Wall Night 1 - Part 2 Only Connect

Welcome back to the Only Connect Wall Night special,

perfect for people who like to spend hours staring at a wall - prisoners.

It's Connecting Walls only.

Earlier, 18 were whittled down into four. The remaining teams are...

They'll get 2½ minutes to solve each wall this time,

but if two teams get the same score, the time it took to find the first group is taken into consideration.

Also, you can still play along live at home

at the same time as the teams.

Before we do all that, let's hear from some favourite alumni,

guests from our previous Only Connect charity specials.

What's great about the Connecting Walls

is they involve lateral knowledge, cultural knowledge.

It's not just memorising the date

or knowing who the bass player was in Blodwyn Pig.

What we're trying to get to is a set of 16 words,

all completely varied, some are names, some are places,

some may be even symbols or numbers,

and when the contestants first look at this board,

they think, "What on earth can possibly connect all these things?"

I think what I find most challenging is that moment when you look at them

and for sometimes quite a considerable period

you can see no pattern whatsoever to what's in front of you.

Then I try to link them arbitrarily,

rather like trying to do an anagram by jumbling letters around and seeing if a pattern emerges.

But there is that moment of terror, followed by despair,

when you think that all your cognitive capacity has failed

and perhaps some cerebral event is happening. That's the worst moment.

Now we have the option where you can play along with the team by playing along live.

You can feel like you're the fourth member of the team and help them solve the grid if they're stuck.

The first time it comes up, I pause it and see what I think and make my guess at what I think they'll be,

not like, "I think there's a category there that's Famous Donalds,"

or, "Look, Great British Poisoners," or whatever, then I let it go itself.

But I always give myself about 20 seconds start,

then sit back with the comfort of going, "No, you fools, it's not that, ha-ha,"

cackling like a Bond villain and twirling my moustache.

With the words of those charity quizzers ringing in their ears,

we bring back the Knitters and the Editors for the first semi-final.

-Editors, are you enjoying being back with Only Connect?

-It's fun.

It's good to see the old faces and recognising people off the telly and realising, "I do recognise them."

Thank you very much! You have a choice, of course.

-Lion or Water?

-Lion, please.

-The Lion Wall will be the first of the semi-final.

-You get 2½ minutes now.

-OK.

And they're going to start now.

That's a financial term, isn't it?

-Yes.

-Banana? Banana bread, banana republic?

-Banana split.

-Banana split.

-Banana...

-Skin.

No, it must be another one.

-Banana bread? We had that.

-We tried that.

-Banana kick?

-Banana kick, yes.

-Try banana kick.

-Split.

-Republic.

-Republic and bread possibly.

Kick, split, republic and skin.

Republic, split, skin, bread.

Perhaps we should try a different...

OK, we'll try one more.

Kick, republic, bread.

Yeah, OK. So what have we got? Haircut... A financial term?

-These are musicals.

-Rodgers and Hammerstein, Lerner and Loewe.

Ashley...

Boublil, I don't know. Short?

Glazer?

I think Glazer.

Try that one, try that one.

No, but that's...

-No.

-No.

-Move on?

Split, so it's not "banana".

-Short.

-Split.

-Haircut...

-Short - is that financial?

-I don't know.

They're names in finance anyway, maybe this will work. Rally...

No.

Split, is it betting?

Betting, ah, spread bet, split bet! Very good.

-Um...

-Short odds? No, I don't know.

You've got a minute left.

No.

What else do we know?

-Glazer...

-That's the manager of...

That's the people who own Manchester United.

-How about managers of football teams?

-OK. Try it. Kander and...

-No.

-No.

I want to say Rodgers for the Lerner and Loewe thing.

-OK, yeah, Rodgers, Lerner...

-Who else would it be then?

You've got 30 seconds.

Do these go in front of any words? Something rally?

Short change, peace...

We had that with "banana".

Um...

Let's go back to the musicians.

Musicians, OK.

You've got ten seconds.

Five seconds.

That's it. Your time is up. You got one group.

Can you tell me the connection - Kick, Skin, Bread, Republic?

-Banana.

-You can put "banana" in front of all of them.

Let's resolve the wall.

Lerner, Kander, Boublil, Rodgers?

They're musicals, the composers of musicals that come in pairs

like Lerner and Loewe, Rodgers and Hammerstein?

Yes, the first half of song-writing duos -

Lerner and Loewe, Kander and Ebb,

Boublil and Schonberg and Rodgers and Hammerstein or Hart.

Absolutely right - half of song-writing duos.

Next - Short, Peace, Glazer, Ashley.

-It's owners of football clubs.

-They are owners of Premier League teams.

-Do you know which teams?

-Glazer's Man U. Peace is...

-We don't know.

-We don't know.

-Ellis Short owns Sunderland FC,

Mike Ashley - Newcastle United, Jeremy Peace - West Bromwich Albion.

I've barely heard of the teams, never mind the owners.

And the last group - Haircut, Rally, Split and Spread.

Financial terms in the markets.

They're stock market terms.

You got one group, but all four connecting points.

That is a total of five. Let's bring back the Knitters to see what they can do with the Connecting Wall.

-Is it just like old times, Knitters, or is it harder than it used to be?

-It's like we've never been away.

-Where did that hair go?

-The Water Wall is awaiting you. You have 2½ minutes to solve it now.

And that time starts now.

Land Of Hope And Glory, Land Of My Fathers.

-Rising Sun.

-Land Of Plenty.

OK.

-Do we find five Land Ofs?

-Yeah.

Are these newspapers - The White Eagle, Pravda, The Rising Sun?

-Another newspaper?

-Try Skylight.

-No.

-We should try the...

-Land Ofs.

-Were there more than four?

Yeah. Land Of Hope And Glory, Land Of My Fathers.

-Land Of The Rising Sun.

-White Eagle?

-Land Of Plenty.

-Got it.

-Well done.

Oriel, is that a...?

Opticians. Oculus, chinrest.

-Um...

-Picture?

-What's an F-hole?

-F-hole is cameras.

No, OK.

-That could be cameras.

-Skylight...

-What was...?

-Pegbox, picture, oculus and F-hole are parts of a camera.

-Is the skylight part of a camera? What about bridge?

-Try it. Go, go.

What the heck's Licking Hitler? I don't really want to ask!

-Who knows?

-A film, play, book?

-Oriel, plenty...

-Um...

Bridges?

Oriel bridge, bow bridge...

Ties?

-Is it bow tie or...?

-Truth? Do things mean "truth"?

Pravda is a play and Plenty is a play.

Licking Hitler must be a play.

And, and, and, and...

You've got a minute left.

-Stick with those three.

-It's David Hare plays.

-Skylight? Yes.

Parts of your face - the bow of your lips, the bridge of your nose.

-Your oculus is your eye.

-Chinrest? What's an oriel?

-Try.

-OK.

-Two more guesses.

-Did you say bits in a camera?

-Camera, yeah.

-And they were...?

-Oculus, F-hole.

-Or parts of an eye maybe.

-Pegbox?

-Is that in a camera?

-You've got 30 seconds.

-Um...

-Well, chinrest is at the optician's, isn't it?

-Yeah.

The pegbox...

-Bow bridge...

-Pegbox.

You've got time.

That's it. The wall has frozen. You've had your three lives.

So you got two groups. Now I need the connections.

My Fathers, The White Eagle, The Rising Sun, Hope And Glory.

-Land Of...

-That's exactly right.

Next group - Licking Hitler, Plenty, Pravda and Skylight.

-They're plays by David Hare.

-They are plays by Sir David Hare.

You can also get points for the connections in the groups you didn't find, so let's resolve the wall.

It should look like that - Bridge, Pegbox, Chinrest, F-hole.

It's things in a violin, bits in a violin.

-They're parts of a violin. You suddenly see it sometimes.

-Yeah.

And the last one - Bow, Oculus, Picture, Oriel.

Do you think they're things to do with the eye

-or the optician's?

-I don't know.

-Parts of a camera?

-I need an answer.

-Parts of a camera.

You were closer with things to do with an eye. It looks out of them.

They're windows, types of window.

But you did find two groups

and got three bonus points, so that is a total of five.

Let's have a look at the scores.

It's a tie-break situation, guys. It is going to come down to which team got the first group fastest.

I can now reveal that to get the first group, the Editors took 38.9 seconds.

The Knitters took 27 seconds.

So, Editors, you have been just pipped and we're losing you here.

Knitters, you're through to the final later.

We've got another semi-final first, but let's have a few more words from our starry alumni.

To play it in the studio is terrifying,

partly because you're overwhelmed by everybody else who's there.

You look up and it's the Poet Laureate

and Stuart Maconie will be the Poet Laureate one day, so it's rather daunting.

Then there's that awful panic moment

when you realise you'll have to deliver the goods and you're not sure you have any goods to deliver.

I don't think we did particularly well.

By the time we got to that round, we had a bit of a lead

and I thought if the other team has nailed the wall,

then we'll be neck and neck or we shouldn't be too far behind,

not that we were being very competitive about it. It was all in a good cause.

I think I was the only Only Connect nut amongst them,

so I was going, "No, leave this to..."

Not, "Leave this to me,"

but Andrew's soft-spoken and went, "What's happening with this wall?"

I said, "Leave this to me, poet. Leave this to me, Andy. I can do this.

"Mumba - Samantha." I felt like I had the advantage over them in that.

I have nightmares about preaching to the Queen and I get up to the pulpit and I've forgotten my sermon,

but I could have an anxiety nightmare easily about being confronted by a wall on television

and having no idea what it means.

So some people find it terrifying to play the Connecting Walls.

I'll have to see what I can do to make it worse!

It's going to be Technologists versus Hitchhikers now.

Technologists, you go first. Do you find it scary to play the wall?

-Yeah.

-We're terrified.

-Good, good.

You have a choice - Lion or Water?

-Lion.

-Lion. That seems the scarier one.

You've got 2½ minutes starting now.

Sponge, pie, sigh, duff.

-Up the duff, up the junction.

-Good.

-Up the creek.

-One more to go with those.

-Flannel, flummery, soft soap and...

-Up the ante.

-Puff.

Up the ante, up the duff,

-up the junction...

-And up the creek.

There you go.

-Very good.

-There's aisle as well.

-Yeah. Up the ante, duff, junction and the fifth one is...

-Creek.

-So leave out creek.

-Leave out creek, leave out ante.

And leave out junction.

And leave out duff. Excellent.

Three strikes and you're out now.

-Peach cobbler, peach pie, peach duff?

-Charlotte sounds like a pudding.

Cobbler is a pudding, sponge is a pudding, pie is a pudding.

-What do we think of the last one?

-So is duff.

-We had this problem last time.

-What are the other things?

The Tao of Pooh, the...

Beater...

World beater, egg beater?

-What does Tao mean to you?

-Taoism.

"Isms"?

Custard perhaps? Custard pie... No, it's not going to work.

Duff...

People? Do you see people's names?

Beater's out there, beater and sigh.

-What goes with beater and sigh?

-Why are they together?

-They're not puddings.

-OK.

Shall we spend one?

Is this called peach duff?

You've got a minute left.

You've solved the wall!

Fantastic stuff. Four points. Bonus points for the connections.

The first one - flannel, flummery, puff, soft soap.

I don't know how to describe it.

-You'll need to find one.

-It's ways of promoting.

-Talking rubbish.

-Spoofing...

-Sort of inflating their sense of worth.

For heaven's sake, I'll accept it. Flattery I would have taken.

-We don't know the word flattery!

-Next one.

Ante, creek, junction, aisle.

-Up the.

-Yes, it can go in front of all of them.

Cobbler, Charlotte, sponge, duff.

-These are all puddings.

-Absolutely.

Last group?

These are all homonyms for something else.

That's not quite good enough. Your problem may be an accent one.

If I say them for you - beater, tao, pie, sigh.

-Greek letter!

-They sound like Greek letters. You needed English voices.

But you found all four groups

and three bonus points. That's a total of seven. We're going to bring back the Hitchhikers now.

-How are you enjoying your return visit?

-You don't get used to this.

We know it was our weak point, but we're ready. Bring on the wall.

The Technologists chose the Lion wall, the scarier option,

so you get Water. Two and a half minutes to solve it starting now.

-OK, The Fly is...

-A film with...

-Jeff Goldblum.

But I don't know any others.

David Cronenberg films! The Fly, Crash...

-And Vertigo...?

-There's deadly sins.

-Pride, envy, greed, sloth.

-Are there any more in there?

-Is desire?

-No, it isn't. Good grief!

-Pack... A pride, a pack, a...

-Oh, I see.

-A desire? Collective nouns, I think.

-You might get a greed.

No.

-Um, disco...

-Are there any other films?

Are there any other...?

I'm just pushing.

-You can go.

-You can have a beetle drive.

-What is it about Ireland?

-That's the country...

-I don't know.

-I'm sure vertigo...

-Green with envy, green Ireland. Anything else?

-Green, green...

-It's not green.

-No, not really.

No, right.

Crash, hazard... Hazard warning. Fire hazard.

-You can burn with desire. Can you burn with anything else?

-No...

-Crash and burn?

-Crash and burn...

-Burn with desire. I don't...

-No, you don't, do you?

-Try the films again.

-The Fly, Crash...

-I'm not sure what the other ones are.

-A minute left.

-But I don't see anything here.

-Um...

-What on Earth is the Crown and Anchor?

-I don't know.

-So you have hazard lights. Any other kind of lights?

-Hazard lights...

Hazard. Go.

-Just for...

-No.

-Oh, green is go.

-Green with envy, Ireland is green and...

-Islam is green.

-Yes, well done!

Um...

-So that leaves...

-You've got 30 seconds.

-The Fly, Crash...

-I'm guessing here.

-What kinds of beetle can you have that go with anything else?

-A beetle drive, a beetle...

-Car.

-Volkswagen.

-No other Volkswagens are there.

-No.

A pride, a pack, a greed... and a crash?

-A hazard?

-10 seconds.

-Keep going.

-5 seconds.

-No, and that's going to be it.

-The wall has frozen.

-We got one!

-Can you tell me the connection? Envy, go, Ireland, Islam.

-All associated with green?

-Yes, many Islamic countries have green in the flag.

There are more connection points, so let's resolve the wall.

-Discotheque, The Fly, Desire, Vertigo.

-Cronenberg films.

It sounds like they could be.

They are number one singles... from U2.

-Oh!

-The band U2.

-Not a fan?

-No.

-Not enough of a fan.

-Third group.

Beetle, Breed, Hazard, Crown and Anchor.

-I can't see anything there.

-I...

-No?

-No.

These are dice games.

-I said beetle drive. I've never heard of the others.

-The last group.

Pack, crash, pride, sloth.

Collective names for animals. Pride of lions, pack of hyenas...

-Noun would be the part of speech.

-I don't know why it took so long!

A crash of rhinoceros and a sloth of...

-Sloth?

-Of bears. A sloth of bears. Well done. You found one group

and got two connecting points. So three. Let's look at the scores.

So Hitchhikers, we're saying goodbye to you again.

Technologists, very well done. You're through to the final.

If you're feeling inspired, you can continue to play on the website.

Plenty of connecting walls are waiting there for you like muggers in an alley.

If you started biting your nails at the beginning, prepare to reach your elbow - it's final time.

The Knitters are taking on the Technologists for the title of Wall Night champion.

In a shock twist, both finalists will be playing the same wall.

Total mano a mano, Knitters. And you're going first.

I'm not offering you a choice. There's only one wall.

You've got two and a half minutes starting now.

-Magazines. ID, GQ.

-Is PSP a magazine? A PlayStation magazine?

-Could be. SFX is. NME.

-FHM is a magazine.

-FHM is a magazine.

-Yes.

-Airports - LAX?

-LAX is an airport.

-San Francisco? Would that be SFO?

-Try it.

There's games consoles as well.

-PSX.

-PSX.

What's NME if it's not...?

SMS would be text messaging, I presume.

Sega Mega System?

-Oh, nice work. What was the other one?

-NES, Nintendo. Oh!

What other kind of consoles are there? Gameboy and X-Box.

Amiga?

-Is PSX...?

-Keep trying.

-Any ideas for the other?

-No. Just keep going, keep trying.

-They're words. Excellency. Enemy.

-Lovely.

-Oh, yes!

-SA.

-PSP? SMS?

SAN? NES?

-SFO.

-PSX...

-Lax is a word, isn't it?

-Yeah, but it's phonetic.

-Escapee!

-Oh, my goodness.

Three strikes and you're out now.

-That's an airport.

-Victoria Coach Station?

-They're all abbreviations.

-You've got a minute left.

-Transport.

-What connection?

-It's got to be NES and PSP. It's the PlayStation.

What's SAN? Any ideas for it?

-Oh, I don't know!

-Just try something at random.

-OK.

Go with those two. Did we do that last time?

-Two more go's.

-Any other ideas?

-That's text messaging.

-Yeah.

-30 seconds.

-Oh, my God!

-And two lives.

-Plenty of time.

-Shall we try airports?

-Go on.

-San Francisco?

-Yeah, give it.

-That could be San Francisco.

PSX might be one.

What else could be...?

-Shall we try that again with another one?

-OK.

You're under 10 seconds now. And the wall has frozen.

OK, you found two groups. What links them? How about the blue group?

-They're all magazines.

-I-D, GQ, SFX and FHM - all monthly magazines.

The green group?

-That's words phonetically...

-If you pronounce the letters.

They call them gramograms. Letters that sound like words.

Escapee, enemy, essay, excellency.

Very good. Bonus points available.

Let's resolve the wall.

-How about that red group?

-Are they...?

-Shall we say messaging systems?

-Messaging terms.

-Messaging systems?

They aren't! I thought you were going to get this. Gaming consoles.

I don't believe it!

-What about the last group?

-Airports?

Transport hubs?

I'm going to accept it. Airports.

They're Californian international airports.

PSP is Palm Springs, SFO I believe is San Francisco,

SAN is San Diego and LAX for Los Angeles.

You found two groups and got three bonus points for a total of five.

We'll bring back the Technologists now and give them the exact same wall. How will their scores compare?

We have never had such an exact comparison. How do you feel about that, Technologists?

-We're feeling lucky. Right?

-We feel lucky.

Let's see how lucky. Two and a half minutes to solve this wall, starting now.

-Wow.

-Ah.

-Airports.

SFO... No.

-Oh, man.

-Interesting.

-NES, PSP...

-Yeah, yeah. Those are computer games.

-No, computer systems.

VCS is one and PSX.

-So there's one more out there.

-SFX is a magazine, FHM is a magazine.

-GQ.

-And so is I-D.

Good. NME is a magazine.

No, sorry, that's the actual...

-Um...

-LAX is an airport.

SFO is an airport.

Um, SAN? SAN sounds right.

-SMS is a messaging term.

-Yeah.

SAN means nothing. Is that a computer language?

It sounds like a computer thing. Should we go like...three computer things and XLNC as the last one?

-No, the NES and PSP are computer...

-So we need five, right?

They're like gaming consoles.

So leave out VCS, leave out PSX.

So we're missing a computer game of some sort. Maybe.

Short message service. SKP? NME?

-Enemy is a word! If you say it out.

-NME.

SA. Essay!

-SFO...NES. NES?

-You've got a minute left.

LAX...

Escape? Escapee?

Escapee! PSP...

-Can you guys try to figure it out and I'll just put everything...?

-No, you can't do it.

-Excellency.

-Three strikes and you're out now.

-We've...

-What are we after, Bruce?

-We're after the computer games.

-We're just missing one. SFO?

-30 seconds.

-Shall we go with the airports?

-Yeah, something different.

-PSX looks like an airport.

-It looks like one.

-VCS?

-VCS.

-Just one life now.

What about mobile phone terms?

I don't think so.

-Go with the computer games again.

-Things that you do with your...

-5 seconds.

-SMS.

-Let's go with the airlines.

-NES?

-Yeah, go for it.

-That's it.

The wall's frozen. But you found two groups and there are bonus points.

-What about the blue group?

-They're magazines.

-That's right.

-Next one down?

-They make words if you say them out loud.

-That's right. They sound like words.

More bonus points available. Let's resolve the wall.

PSX, VCS, NES, SMS.

-Computer games consoles.

-Home gaming consoles. Do you know any of them?

PlayStation, Atari VCS, Nintendo NES...

And the SMS is a Sega one. Sega Master System.

Home gaming consoles. Well done.

And the last one. PSP, SFO, SAN, LAX.

-Airport abbreviations.

-Can you be more specific?

-In...North America.

-Well, in California.

-San Francisco, LA...

-The specific answer is airports in California.

So you found two groups,

you got four points for connections. That is a total of six points.

Let's see who the winner is.

Very well played, Knitters, but, Technologists, you are the Only Connect Wall Night champions.

There is your lovely trophy. Very well done to you.

I hope you enjoyed our Wall Night special. Sorry to anyone whose favourite is the missing vowels.

You must have been trrbly dsppntd. Goodbye.

Subtitles by Subtext for Red Bee Media Ltd - 2011

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