Musicals Pointless Celebrities

Thank you very much, indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong.

A very warm welcome to this special musicals edition of Pointless Celebrities.

The show where the aim of the game is to score

as few points as you can and you do that by coming up with the answers

no-one else can think of. Let's meet today's Pointless celebrities.

And couple number one.

Don Black, songwriter.

Tim Rice, songwriter.

-Couple number two.

-I'm Phill Jupitus,

currently appearing in the UK tour of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

with one of the other contestants.

I'm Cory English.

I've been doing Broadway and West End musicals for 25 years now.

Couple number three.

Hello, I'm Nigel Planer and, in fact,

Sir Tim over there gave me my first job in musicals.

A long time ago I was the David Essex understudy in the musical Evita.

I'm Claire Sweeney and I am playing Phill's long-suffering wife

in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang in the UK.

And, finally, couple number four.

My name's Siobhan Dillon.

I'm currently starring in Sunset Boulevard

at London Coliseum with the beautiful Glenn Close.

I'm Connie Fisher.

I'm best known for playing Maria in The Sound Of Music.

I present BBC One's Songs Of Praise and work as a TV producer.

Thank you very much, all of you. A very warm welcome to Pointless.

It's lovely to have you all here.

We'll get to chat to each of you during the show as it goes along,

of course. So that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

It's not all about me, me, me, it's about him, him, him as well.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya. Evening, everybody.

Good evening, Xander.

-Good evening.

-Now, what a line-up.

-How lovely.

-I know.

-This is going to be a joy.

I wonder... Listen, I love everybody, don't get me wrong,

but have we ever had a more distinguished podium one than we have this evening?

-Never.

-Goodness me.

That's classy. Also, their introductions, so classy.

Right. If I was one of the other pairs - and you're all welcome, you know that -

I would feel very guilty at knocking them out at any point of the show.

-Yeah.

-Would be my opinion.

Also, the two of them probably very able to employ the other six

-at any time, as well.

-Yes.

-Yes.

-And you, as well, to be fair.

-Don't think that's escaped my notice.

-Given I can't sing,

I'm the only person here who doesn't have to impress you at any time.

That's the good news.

-Although, you know, I can...

-You certainly can.

Yeah, I've got a mezzo soprano hidden away somewhere.

-Yes, I met her.

-Yeah.

I should... Really should let her out.

Again, I don't wish to favour podium one,

but Round One is the sort of round you should be very good at if you

are two of the country's greatest ever lyricists, I would say.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, as usual, all of today's questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants here are looking for those all-important pointless

answers. These being answers that none of our 100 people gave.

Find one of those, we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

Now, as today's show's a celebrity special and each of our wonderful

celebrities here is playing for a nominated charity,

we're going to start off with a jackpot of £2,500. There we are.

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

So, all you have to remember is this.

The pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated. That is it.

No conferring till we get to the head-to-head round.

Best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category today is...

Words. It's...

ALEXANDER LAUGHS

..a words round, podium one.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second.

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many words ending

in O-O-T as they could.

Words ending in O-O-T.

Yeah, were looking for any word which has its own entry

in the British and world English section of

the Oxforddictionaries.com, please, that ends O-O-T.

As always, no proper nouns, no hyphenated words.

I'm going to predict what you're going to say, but

it's quite tricky on this one. I've got it wrong three times in a row.

I know. Normally, your...

It's almost like we're drifting apart, somehow.

That's fine. Every relationship goes through its rocky patches.

Yes, it does, it does. Let's see if we can bring it back

-on course today.

-Let's do exactly that.

Come on. Come on, big guy.

Thanks, Rich.

Tim, welcome back to Pointless.

It's lovely to have you here, as ever.

Now, Tim, you are on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame.

-Yeah.

-Now that's... I don't think we've had... We've never had

anyone on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame on Pointless before.

-Chico.

-We've had Chico.

Tim, how does that happen?

How do they tell you about it, to start with?

Well, you basically pay for it.

-Really?

-I think you have to be nominated.

I got a letter, and that was great.

Does the letter come in a big gold envelope?

I can't remember. But it's obviously a very nice thing to have.

I was last there before I was so honoured to see my heroes

The Everly Brothers. I went to visit their gold star

and they were outside a rather dubious shop.

But actually, it was rather good because as people came out of

that shop, they were looking down,

so The Everly Brothers are probably seen more than most people.

LAUGHTER

-I bet they are.

-But, no, it was great.

It was a nice thing to have happen.

Wonderful. Tim, we're looking for any word that ends O-O-T.

Well, I can think of a few risky ones,

but I'm going to be boring and play safe and go for scoot.

-Scoot...

-Scoot.

..says Tim. Let's see how many of our 100 people said scoot.

25 for scoot.

APPLAUSE

To leave somewhere quickly. To scoot.

-I've got one.

-Have you got one?

I've written down what I think you have, but...

-If you know what I mean.

-I do.

Cory, a very warm welcome to you.

Now, you've been on Broadway, you've been on the West End,

you have a very, very long experience of both.

What's the difference between American audiences

-and British audiences, do you think?

-Yeah, good question.

Well, the Broadway audiences do have Times Square

and that energy of New York City.

All the shows start at eight o'clock

and everybody running late to the theatre,

-and there is that buzz of Broadway, that helps.

-Yeah.

Here, everybody's on time.

You know, they get to the theatre on time, it's at 7:30, 7:45

is the start, so it's nice and calm.

It sometimes just lacks a little bit of the buzz,

-but once they're in the theatre, it's the same.

-There we are.

Now, Cory, we're looking for any word that ends O-O-T.

All right. Let's go with...

-loot.

-Ah, loot.

Also the name of a Tim Rice musical, actually, in a different spelling,

but there we are. Loot, says Cory.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

AUDIENCE GROAN

-Whoa! Look at that!

-Nelly Furtado!

Look at that, Cory.

That really is... That's quite a score, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, to loot, to steal, or what you steal is also loot.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Now then, Nigel, welcome back to Pointless.

-Yes.

-Tell me about Doctor Who live. This is extraordinary.

You've been doing a live show of Doctor Who playing a villain.

Yes, with the live orchestra on stage, playing Murray Gold's music.

-Yeah.

-Yes, I was the only human being in the show.

The rest were all what's known as skin workers, people who put on...

Monster players.

-Wow!

-And they had to be all the different monsters.

And there was me and, Matt Smith was in it, but he was on a big screen.

He'd pre-recorded all his scenes...

-Oh, that's lazy.

-..so I had to time my lines to his pre-record

and it looked like we were having dialogue.

-Yeah.

-And I caught him in a little booth.

A sort of hologram booth, and I captured him cos I was a baddie,

and at the end of the first half I managed to say,

"Welcome to my experiment, Doctor."

-Which was great.

-Amazing.

Nigel, words ending O-O-T.

Well, I'm going to take a cos I'm not even sure if it is a word,

but if it is, I think it won't have been chosen by many people,

so I may completely blow this. I'm going say moot.

-M-O-O-T.

-Moot? Moot, says Nigel.

Well, let's see. How many of our 100 people said moot?

It's absolutely right.

86 our high score and you pass that very comfortably.

Oh. 54 for moot.

I'm surprised.

Oh, I thought we were going to get a really obscure one there.

A moot is what surrounds a castle for Geordies.

LAUGHTER

Thanks very much, indeed.

Connie, welcome back to Pointless. Great to have you here again.

-Thank you.

-When you did How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria?,

did they approach you? Did they come to you and say or do they go around

various drama schools and say, "Would anybody be interested?"

-Or did you audition?

-They didn't, actually.

I was working in telesales

and I was auditioning for a lot of Sir Tim Rice's shows at the time.

I wasn't getting them. So my friend in telesales said,

"Have you listened to Front Row?" And so I was listening to Front Row

and I heard Lloyd-Webber say he was looking for a girl.

But even though I'd got a degree in musical theatre,

a piece of paper when you're performing isn't very handy, so...

-No.

-But, yeah, I turned up and I won it.

-I couldn't believe it.

-Very good. Now then, Connie,

what would you like to go for? We've had a range of scores.

Oh, I've got lots of words running through my head.

They're probably not words.

I'm going to go - it's probably not a word - cahoot.

-Ooh.

-Yeah, good one.

-Very good.

-Is it?

Does it exist in the singular?

How many of our 100 people said cahoot?

Oh, no. Oh, no!

Oh, no, that's so unfair, because you were taking a risk.

And I might say the first person to have done so.

-But cahoot, I'm afraid...

-Boot would've been 100, so...

It scores you 100. But, listen, Cory is just literally

-beside you in the scoring, so don't worry.

-Just the plural, I'm afraid.

Cahoots but no cahoot.

But, as I say, you know what, there's some big scores out there,

-so you may still go through.

-I should think so.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at those scores.

25, Sir Tim. 25, the best score of that pass,

putting you and Don at the top the table.

Then up to 54, where we find Nigel and Claire,

then up to 86, where we find Cory and Phill,

and then up to 100, where we find Connie and Siobhan.

So, Siobhan, you're not that far ahead,

but far enough ahead for you to need a low-scoring answer,

so very good luck with that when we come back down the line,

which we're just about to do.

Will the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, Siobhan, so remember, it's words ending O-O-T.

Siobhan, what was your route into musical theatre?

The reality TV show How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria?

-I was at fashion college at the time.

-You just heard about

-it and applied?

-Heard about it. Friend of mine pulled open

the Stage newspaper and said, "I'm going to go to this,

"do you want to come?" And I was like, "Yeah, great,

"come and see me in London, we'll do it together." And the day before,

she pulled out, so I went with my housemate, instead.

Ah, well, that's nice.

-How is Glenn Close?

-Beautiful. She's amazing.

She's talented and she's humble and she's a team player.

She's really, really brilliant.

Wonderful. Now, Siobhan, words ending O-O-T.

We really need a low scoring one.

We haven't... Quite often, we get some pointless words in

-these words rounds.

-Pressure.

-So, no pressure, then?

I'm not going to lie, there is a little bit of pressure

-involved here. Yeah.

-I'd like to go with beetroot.

Ah, you see!

What about that? Music to my ears and my taste buds.

Extremely good for you, the beetroot.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said beetroot.

No red line for you, as you're the high scorers.

It's right. Our lowest score is 25.

I rather fancy this might go below it, and it does.

Six.

You see, Siobhan. Very well done, indeed.

106 is your total. I think you might have done enough.

That's more like it, isn't it? A great answer, yeah, beetroot.

I'm not a fan of beetroot. You sound like maybe you like it.

I used to hate... You know how some of the things you come to love more

and more when you're a bit older?

Quite often, they're things you hated when you were younger.

-I hated beetroot. Love them now.

-Really?

-Beetroot, whisky.

-Beetroot and whisky.

-Beetroot, whisky, anchovies.

-I know what I'm getting you for Christmas.

Lovely big beetroot.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Claire, now, my goodness.

You, uniquely amongst our eight contestants,

have acted alongside Patrick Swayze.

Yes. Yeah, God rest his soul.

-How was that?

-Oh, he was gorgeous.

Abso... I couldn't believe every night I was getting paid

to kiss him.

LAUGHTER

It was fabulous.

And this is the Donmar Guys And Dolls, wasn't it?

-It was, yeah, which Cory did, as well, didn't you?

-It was brilliant.

I went in just after Cory.

Such a great... And Douglas Hodge was in it, as well.

-Doug Hodge, yeah.

-It was an amazing cast.

Now, you've got a young child.

-I have, an 18-month-old boy.

-Yeah.

How do you find that works around the sort of eight shows a week?

He comes everywhere with me and I have a wonderful nanny

-who looks after him when I'm on stage.

-Yeah.

-But it's so good

for him, cos he's surrounded by happy faces, music, dancing.

-Yeah.

-He comes to warm up with me. He's great.

-Very good.

-Now then, Clare, you are on 54.

-Oh, my goodness.

The high scorers behind you are Siobhan and Connie on 106.

So, 51 or less gets you through.

See, there's words going through my mind,

but I'm not sure if they're actually words,

so go for one of those and get 100, or play safe and...

I'm going to play safe. I'm sorry, Nigel.

I'm going to go for foot.

-Foot. Foot. Foot. There's your red line.

-That's fine, isn't it? O-O-T.

If you can get... I think it is. Let's see how many of our 100 people said foot.

AUDIENCE GROANS

-85.

-I'm sorry.

-Well, listen...

it's one better than loot. Takes your total up to 139.

That was my original choice, so...

I think this might be the highest scoring words round we've ever had.

-I believe so.

-I think.

-Yes, yes. I'm now so pleased with my one.

-A lot of pressure taken off you now.

-Yeah.

Phill, now, you have sort of set up home in musical theatre.

-What was the first one you did?

-I did Hairspray.

I'm not entirely sure...

why I was asked. To be honest, there is a lovely man called James Orange

and a man called David Grindrod, who are casting directors.

They got me in and said, "We'd like a chat with you about musicals."

And I'm like, "Why?" And they went, "You know that bit on Buzzcocks

"where you do the beginning of songs? We can see that you can

"hold a tune." And I thought, well, the bar's quite low

in musical theatre if me going...

"Doof doo doo-doo doof doof"

..ends up with me dressed as a woman in the West End for money,

which is probably where my career was going to end, anyway, so!

And then you went from that. You've been in Spamalot,

-you've been in The Producers.

-Yeah.

-You're in Chitty Bang Bang.

Yes, yes, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, with Claire.

And if you think that she's delighted she was paid

to kiss Swayze...

LAUGHTER

..now is when she morally pays back.

Kissing me for less money.

-Now, you're on 86, Phill.

-Yes.

The highest scorers are in front of you,

Claire and Nigel on 139.

So 52 or less brings you home.

-Yeah.

-Come on, Phill. Come on, Phill!

-Loot. What were you thinking?

-Carry me!

-Carry me.

-Good lord.

I'm going to go with cheroot.

-ALL:

-Ooh!

-Very good, very good.

Cheroot, says Phill.

Now, here is your red line, just over halfway up the column.

Cheroot. Let's see how many of our 100 people went for that.

It's right. And surely...

And it does get you through.

Nine.

Nine. I mean, it's no beetroot, but still, it's good enough.

Takes your total up to 95.

Well played, Phill. Yes, a cigar with both ends open.

I saw Phill in Hairspray. He was brilliant.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

-And Don.

-Yes.

Don, what a great pleasure to have you here.

Think of all the collaborations you've had.

I mean, you have worked with incredible composers,

you've worked with amazing singers.

Quincy Jones, Michael Jackson, you've worked with.

I mean, extraordinary, extraordinary range of people.

When you're writing songs, do you have a notebook on you at all times,

and a pencil?

More or less. Yeah, it's always good to write.

If anyone says anything... If I was in a restaurant,

and I heard at the next table somebody said,

"You've lost that loving feeling," I'd write it down right away.

Someone has done that already.

-It wasn't you, was it?

-No, no.

-Oh, phew.

Wouldn't that be awkward?

Well, Don, listen, the great news is you're through to the next round.

It doesn't matter what you say, but I'm pretty sure

you'll have a brilliant answer.

I've always been a great lover of Western movies.

Cowboys and Indians.

And the word tenderfoot comes up a lot.

Tender... Now that, that's either going to hit one or the other end

-of the column...

-That's right, exactly.

-..I reckon.

Tenderfoot. There's no red line for you, Don,

for the lovely reason that you're already through,

but let's see how many of our 100 said tenderfoot.

It is right.

I think we might be hearing the ding of a pointless here.

Look at that! CHEERING

Very well done, indeed, Don. Beautifully done.

That's a pointless answer and adds £250 to today's jackpot, takes

the total up to £2,750.

It scores you nothing. It leaves your total at 25,

which is by a margin the lowest score of the whole round.

That's a terrific answer, Don. Very well played.

Yeah, it means a newcomer, or novice.

As you say, often used in those old westerns

and in the old western books, as well.

Lots and lots of pointless answers.

-ALEXANDER COUGHS

-I haven't forgotten you.

-OK, OK.

-He's very needy sometimes.

LAUGHTER

Go on, then. No, go on.

-Arrowroot.

-You know what, that was my second choice for you.

-I'm annoyed, now.

-Was it?

-Yeah.

-Oh, no.

I went for... I thought you would say bandicoot.

Oh, no, I did think bandicoot, as well.

I'm so annoyed. Arrowroot would've scored two.

-What was bandicoot?

-Bandicoot was three. So you did better than me.

-Oh, phew. OK. There we are.

-So that's good.

There's lots of good pointless answers though.

Let's take a look at some of them.

A coralroot is an orchid. Crapshoot is a pointless answer.

Flatfoot, also a pointless answer,

often used as a name for a police officer.

Outroot. Overboot, something you put over your boot.

Pussyfoot. See, when you hear them, they're kind of obvious.

To troubleshoot. Underfoot.

Unroot. You could have had pinkfoot, you could have had outshoot,

goosefoot, forefoot. You could've had jackboot.

There's all sorts of good pointless answers up there.

Let's take a look at the top three scorers.

Normally, this is, "Let's have a laugh at the biggest scorers,"

but some of these will be familiar.

LAUGHTER

Foot would've scored you 85.

Look at that, Cory, loot with 86.

And boot, which would have scored you 90.

There we are, thanks very much indeed, Richard.

So, and the end of our first round, I'm so sorry.

Claire and Nigel, two returners we have to send away,

with a high score of 139.

It's been lovely having you here.

Thank you so much for coming to play. Far too soon to be

sending you away, but thank you, Claire and Nigel.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And so three pairs remain.

At the end of this round, we will have to say goodbye to another pair.

Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two this evening is...

-Yes!

-Pop Music, something many of you are familiar with.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second. And whoever's going first,

please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

Young chart stars, Richard.

On each board, we're going to show you the names of six UK

top 40 singles, all of which became hits when the act who released them

was under 20 years old. Just need to name those acts, please.

Six on the first board, six on the second,

12 in all to have a go at home. Very best of luck.

OK, so we're looking for the name of the artists who had hits

with these songs.

Here's our first board.

We have...

I shall read those all again.

Tim.

Xander, I know...

I think I know four of them.

And, being an old codger, I'm going back into the past.

I'll go for Musical Youth, Pass The Dutchie.

Musical Youth, says Tim.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Musical Youth.

Not bad. 34 for Musical Youth.

APPLAUSE

That is a solid start. Yeah, sold over four million

copies worldwide, Pass The Dutchie.

Not bad at all.

Now then, Cory.

Doomed.

Puppy Love.

Oh, gosh.

Stitches.

Well, I've just got to make...

an uneducated guess.

-Yes.

-And say Depeche Mode, Uptight.

-Argh!

-We got it. This is it. No, no, no, think positive, Phill.

OK.

S...

They weren't even born in '66!

-Oh, God!

-LAUGHTER

SW.

Depeche Mode, says Cory. LAUGHTER

Let's see how many of our 100 people...

..said that.

Let it be there, let it be there.

There we are. I'm afraid...

APPLAUSE

I'm sorry, Corey. An incorrect answer, as it turns out.

Scores you 100 points.

Yeah, although they were originally called Sepeche Wode.

-LAUGHTER

-So it's not a bad answer.

-Yeah.

Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Siobhan, this board's all yours.

Would you like to go through it and fill in all our blanks for us?

I'm really struggling, I'm not going to lie.

Do you want to go through them and do some thinking aloud?

No, absolutely not. That would just be embarrassing.

Let's just put it out there. Puppy Love, Donny Osmond?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Donny Osmond. CHEERING

Is that the answer you want to go for?

-That's the answer.

-"Of course," says Cory!

Sepeche Wode.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Donny Osmond

for Puppy Love. Let's see how many people.

-Well, 100 was our high score and you've passed that.

-Yay!

71 is where you end up with Donny Osmond.

-Not bad.

-Yeah, a cover of a Paul Anka song, that was.

Now, let's fill these in, shall we?

All Kinds Of Everything, D.

-Dana.

-Dana, yeah. Absolutely. That would have scored 38.

Now, No No No. It's Destiny's Child.

-CONNIE:

-We should have gone for that!

-Stitches, which is

the most recent one on the board, is Shawn Mendes,

who came to fame on Vine and now sells millions of records.

Would have scored you six points.

-And Uptight (Everything's Alright).

-Stevie Wonder.

-Stevie Wonder,

of course it is. 21 points for that.

So Destiny's Child the best answer on the board.

-Well done if you said that.

-Thanks very much indeed.

Well, let's see where we find ourselves halfway through the round.

34, the best score, Tim and Don.

Once again looking very strong at this stage for the head-to-head.

Then up to 71, quite a leap up there,

where we find Siobhan and Connie.

And then it's up to 100, Cory and Phill.

However, if one was thinking of there's a sort of handicap race,

I would say that that's probably about right,

cos, Phill, got a bit of a mountain to climb,

but you knew all of that. He's going to be fine.

You're going to be fine. Best of luck with that.

We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium.

OK, we're going to put six more clues up on the board,

six more songs, and here they are.

We've got...

I'll say all those again.

Now then, Connie, if you could possibly score 28

-or less, you'd be definitely...

-We won't.

-..in the next round.

Clearly, I'm not going to go for the third one,

because everyone's going to get that.

HS. Who could it be?

Oh, hang on, HS!

Don't laugh. It's not Harry Secombe, is it?

LAUGHTER

-Would it be Harry Secombe?

-OK, Harry Secombe.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Harry Secombe.

-There's your red line.

-There it is, there it is.

-Just leave us waiting.

-Oh!

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, not Harry...

-Was it Harry Styles?

-Not Harry Secombe!

LAUGHTER

Scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 171.

-You're still in the game.

-Absolutely. You know what,

not a terrible answer. You got the initials right.

At least you didn't say Depeche Mode.

-There we are.

-That's right!

-Thank you very much. Phill.

-Hello.

Now, listen, if you could score 70 or less, you're in the head-to-head.

OK. All right, all right!

Well, I want to go out burning,

I want to go flaming into the ground.

Let's do it.

Don't Treat Me Like A Child, Helen Shapiro.

Helen Shapiro.

AUDIENCE OOHS Oh, listen to that.

Appreciative buzz from our audience there.

Here is your red line. Nice and high.

Get below that with Helen Shapiro, you're into the head-to-head.

-How many people said Helen Shapiro?

-Come on, Phill Jupitus.

It is Helen Shapiro.

You are in the head-to-head.

Good.

18.

-118 is your total.

-I should not be here!

18, incidentally, the lowest score of the round so far.

She was 14 years old when she released that song,

and then moved to Basildon in the '80s and formed a synthesiser group

called Depeche Mode. That was her band.

-Thank you very much indeed. Now, Don.

-Yes.

I've great news. You're through, it doesn't matter what you score.

-Right.

-What are you going to go for on this board?

-I'll talk you through the first one.

-Yes.

-Because I know that.

And I'll go for Lena Zavaroni.

Lena Zavaroni, says Don.

No red line for you, you're already through.

Let's see how many people said Lena Zavaroni.

It's right.

29 for Lena Zavaroni,

taking your total up to 63, the lowest total by some distance

-of the round.

-Well played, Don, yeah, found fame

on Opportunity Knocks, Lena Zavaroni.

Now, this next one, do you remember this next one down?

-One of those many novelty singles.

-Do you know, I don't.

It was by Claire And Friends.

Three points for that. Later covered by Metallica.

-LAUGHTER

-Now, Rockin' Robin.

-Connie.

-I think it's Michael Jackson.

Michael Jackson. Absolutely right.

Big score, though. It would still have seen you knocked out.

-Yeah.

-Would have scored you 58. I Think We're Alone Now.

Tiffany. That's a good song.

30 points for that. Now, Whip My Hair, Will Smith's daughter, Willow.

That would have scored 14.

Thanks very much, Richard. So, at the end of our second round,

I'm sorry, the pair we have to say goodbye to,

heading home with their high score of 171, Connie and Siobhan.

-It is you. It's been lovely having you here, though.

-Thank you.

-Please come and play again. Connie and Siobhan.

-Thank you!

But for Cory and Phill, Don and Tim, it's now time for our head-to-head.

Well, congratulations, Don and Tim, Corey and Phill.

You're now one step closer to the final and a chance to play for our

jackpot, which currently stands at...

So here we are. We've reached the head-to-head stage.

This means we have to decide who goes through to the final to play

for that jackpot and we do it by making you go head-to-head,

but you can start playing as a team, which is great.

You can chat before you give your answers.

First pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

This is very exciting.

So we have here two of the finest lyricists of all time

versus two of the finest musical and comedy talents

of the West End and Broadway.

Fight! Let's play the head-to-head.

Here is your first question and it concerns...

Winners Of The Best Actor Olivier Award. Richard.

We're going to show you five pictures now of people who have won

the Best Actor or Best Actor In A Musical at the Olivier Awards.

Can you identify the most obscure of these, please.

OK, let's reveal our five actors, and here they come.

There we are. Five Best Actors.

Don and Tim, you're our low scorers, so you'll go first.

Right. Yes...

Well, we think we know three of them,

which is not very good, really.

We're going to go for A, is that right?

We're going to go for A, and that is Robert Lindsay.

Robert Lindsay say Don and Tim. Robert Lindsay.

Now then, Corey and Phill, talk us through that board.

Yeah, I know them all.

So it's Bob Lindsay, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Spacey,

Cumberbatch and Jacobi.

I thought D, maybe.

-No, they know?

-Everyone knows Cumberbatch.

I don't think that they'd know Jacobi.

-Yeah. All right.

-I'll go with Jacobi, E.

-Derek Jacobi.

-Derek Jacobi.

There we are. So we have Derek Jacobi and Robert Lindsay.

Don and Tim said Robert Lindsey for A

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many of our 100 people

said Robert Lindsay.

It's right.

Oh, it's a good answer. 26.

26 for Robert Lindsay.

Now, meanwhile, Cory and Phill have said Derek Jacobi for E.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people said Derek Jacobi.

It's right.

It's...

very good.

Look at that, 19 for Derek Jacobi. Very well done, indeed.

Very well done. It means Corey and Phill, after one question,

-you are up 1-0.

-Yeah, well played. Funnily enough, Benedict Cumberbatch

also would have won the point, cos he would have scored you 25.

Would have been more exciting telly if you had said Cumberbatch.

Best answer on the board, though, is B, by a long way.

Chiwetel Ejiofor. He would have scored you six points.

Well done if you said that at home.

And the biggest score on the board, Kevin Spacey.

-Who?

-With 52.

Thank you very much. Here is your second question.

Now, Don and Tim, Corey and Phill will get to answer this first, but

you have to win it to stay in the game, so very, very best of luck.

It concerns, this second question of ours...

-Cameron Mackintosh Productions. Richard.

-The answer to every

clue here is the name of a show produced or associated

with Cameron Mackintosh. Very best of luck.

Now, rather than me reading out the clues here,

we've got someone else. We have Sir Cameron Mackintosh himself.

Hi, Xander and Richard, I'm really sorry I can't be with you

and I've had to sit in my little hovel of an office here,

but I've got five questions about my musicals I'd like to give you.

What was the name of the musical that I produced in 2001,

based on the story of Pygmalion?

What is the name of the musical that I co-created in 2004 that was based

on the books of PL Travers and a famous Disney film?

What was the name of the TV show that I was in where,

for my production of Oliver, starring Rowan Atkinson,

the viewers had to choose who was going to play Nancy?

Which musical of mine contains the songs Movie In My Mind

and The American Dream?

Which musical of mine is based on TS Eliot's poems?

With a little bit of luck, you'll get all the questions right.

Good luck, everybody.

OK, let me read through those questions one more time.

There we are.

Now then, Cory and Phill will go first.

This is you. It's yours.

Come on. Come on, Stateside.

Well, the most obscure, we've got...

The second thing.

-Yes.

-101 Dalmatians.

101 Dalmatians.

OK. Now then, Don and Tim.

That board is all yours. Talk us through.

We know four for sure, I think.

But the one that we think will get us the least points...

Just get it right, Don.

The Movie In My Mind and the American Dream

comes from Miss Saigon.

Miss Saigon. So we have 101 Dalmatians versus Miss Saigon.

In the order they were given,

Corey and Phill said 101 Dalmatians for the PL Travers book.

Let's see if that's right.

Oh, they're getting the eggs ready.

No, I'm afraid.

Not 101 Dalmatians,

which means, Don and Tim,

you merely have to be correct with your answer of Miss Saigon...

We know it as well!

..and you'll be back in the game.

Let's see if it's right.

Look at that. Very well done.

Good answer.

Look, right down to four.

Best answer on the board, I would imagine there.

And it means, Don and Tim, you're back in the game.

-After two questions it is 1-1.

-We had to give them a chance!

Not just a good answer, the best answer on the board,

so very well played. Now it's not 101 Dalmatians, I'm afraid.

That's written by Dodie Smith.

PL Travers wrote...

-Mary Poppins.

-Mary Poppins.

It would have scored you 21 points.

The top one, the musical based on Pygmalion.

-My Fair Lady.

-My Fair Lady.

Would have scored 30.

The title of the TV show?

I'd Do Anything.

Yeah. Six points for that.

And this musical is based on a collection of poems.

-It's Cats.

-It's Cats. And that would have scored you 41.

There we are. Thank you very much indeed.

OK, here comes your third question. This is the decider.

Whoever wins this one goes through to the final

and plays for that jackpot. Best of luck to both pairs.

Our third question concerns...

Types Of Bean!

-Types Of Bean.

-What better way to divide you than this?

We are now going to show you the names of five types of bean,

but in the form of anagrams.

Can you unscramble them?

And the team giving us the lowest score

is going through to play for that jackpot. Very best of luck.

Here we go. Let's reveal our five beans.

And here they come.

So, Don and Tim, you will go first.

I feel like a has-been.

Very good.

That's all you need.

We're going to have a go at the fourth one down.

Which is haricot.

Haricot, haricot say Don and Tim.

Now then, Corey and Phill.

The only one that I can solve the anagram of

is the one that will be the highest answer and haricot will

knock it right out of the park. So, start the van, Barry.

Uh...

Um...

Oh, come on. Runner.

-One.

-Runner.

OK, so we have haricot and we have runner.

We have Don and Tim going for haricot.

Let's see if that's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people got haricot.

It's right.

28 for haricot.

-Now...

-Mid '80s.

-Mid-80s, says Phil.

-Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we're back to Depeche Mode again, are we?

Corey and Phill went for runner. Let's see if it's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said runner.

Oh. 74, 74.

Sorry, Cory and Phill.

-Very well done.

-I feel sorry for the runner bean, falling out of favour.

Don and Tim, very well done.

After three questions you're through to the final, 2-1.

Yes, a couple of answers that would have beaten your score there.

Not the bottom one. The bottom one would have scored too much.

-That's...

-Broad.

-Broad bean.

That would have scored 47. Chip cake. Do you know that one?

We don't think of it as a bean.

Chickpea. That would have scored 13.

Now, this is the hard one. A solo papa.

You'd have to have heard of this, I suspect.

It's an appaloosa.

Appaloosa. Would've scored you two points.

Lovely word to use in a song, though.

Appaloosa. Isn't it? Tuck that away.

Don't Cry For Me, Appaloosa.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round, I'm afraid, is Cory and Phill.

-Oh.

-Come on, they're the better team.

They should be here. Come on.

-Yeah, yeah.

-Hey, no-one's denying that, Cory.

Although... Although, if Cameron is watching, I think

101 dogs loose on a stage in the West End is an excellent idea.

Cory and Phill, it's been fabulous having you here.

Thank you so much for playing and playing so well. Cory and Phill, everyone.

APPLAUSE

But, for Don and Tim, it is now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Don and Tim,

you have seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

Can we now be known as... What was it, Don, you said?

Tenderfoot and Haricot.

Tenderfoot and Haricot.

Congratulations, Tenderfoot and Haricot.

You can be called anything you like, frankly,

now you've made it this far. You now have a chance to win

our Pointless jackpot, and at the end of today's show,

the jackpot is standing at £2,750.

APPLAUSE

Very, very well done.

Now, you started off, in the first round, with a pointless answer.

All you have to do now is round it off, bookend it with another

pointless answer at this end of the show and you will

take home that jackpot for your charities.

As you know what happens, we put four categories up on the board

behind me and you've just got to hope there is something up there

you quite like the look of. Very, very best of luck.

Today's selection looks like this.

I'm not bad at Geography, but the other two, Fashion, hard to believe.

Just look at us, I mean, pretty obvious.

We are fashion icons, but that worries us.

I think Music By Numbers.

Between us we might be lucky.

OK. Music By Numbers.

OK. Haricot says Music By Numbers.

Very best of luck. Here are your three questions.

I hope one of these suits you.

We are looking for the name of any track on Adele's album 25.

So any track on the original release of that.

We're looking for any track on George Michael's greatest hits album

Twenty Five, released in 2006,

or any tracks on A-ha's greatest hits album,

25: The Very Best Of A-ha,

released in 2010.

So tracks on any of these 25s.

Adele, George Michael, or the very best of A-ha.

Very, very best of luck.

OK, as always, you've got up to one minute to come up with

three answers and all you need to win that jackpot for your charities

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Well...

-We are ready.

OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

I don't think people will know that.

-No, I don't think that...

-Living Daylights?

Crying In The Rain, but they'll forget that one.

-Which one?

-On A-ha.

-OK.

-And the only track I can remember on Adele's album is Hello.

And everyone will know that.

-OK.

-George Michael.

Is that a greatest hits album or...

-Yeah, greatest hits album.

-Greatest hits album.

What was a small greatest hit he had?

One that people won't know?

I only know his big hits.

But I think you're right, the A-ha, I think A-ha is good,

because not many people know too much about A-ha.

Um... Well, I think... I would like,

-definitely, to go for Crying In The Rain.

-OK.

-Last two.

-We've got to think of two others.

Panic. George Michael.

What's he done? Things like Faith and...

Yes.

Father. What was that...? Father Figure.

That'll be...

It's hard to think of titles.

We're struggling here.

We're struggling. And Adele's...

-Pavements?

-OK.

That is your time up.

Let's have your three answers.

-Well we're definitely going for Crying In The Rain by A-ha.

-OK, Crying In The Rain.

And a George Michael track.

-Yes. A duet.

-Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me.

Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me.

By George Michael. What was the other A-ha one you thought of?

The Living Daylights, the James Bond.

-And Living Daylights.

-Yeah.

OK, those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-I think the Crying In The Rain.

-I think Crying In The Rain, too.

Let's put that last. Least likely to be pointless?

-The other one. What was the other one? I forgot.

-The other one was...

-Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me.

-Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me.

OK. And Living Daylights in the middle.

OK, well, let's put those answers up on the board in that order,

and here they are. We have got...

Well, very, very best of luck. Three good answers there.

Let's hope one of those, at least, is pointless

and will win that jackpot for your charities.

What charities are you playing for, Don, you first.

Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital.

Excellent. Tim?

Chance To Shine, which is a charity that, through cricket,

enables people from state schools to get out and play more sport.

Very good indeed. Two wonderful charities there.

APPLAUSE

Fingers crossed one of these answers will win that jackpot for you to

split between those charities. Well, best of luck. As I say,

your first answer was Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me.

In this case we were looking for tracks from

George Michael's best-of album called Twenty Five.

It has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot, so let's find out,

for £2,750, how many people said Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me?

It's right.

It now just has to go down to zero

and you will leave with that jackpot to split between your charities.

Down we go. Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me, into the teens,

into single figures. Down it goes.

Still going down...

Oh, two! We stop at two.

That's not bad.

That's really not bad.

-OK.

-Not bad at all.

Very, very well done.

Sadly, not a pointless answer, which means we move on to your answer,

which is The Living Daylights.

In this case, we were looking for A-ha tracks from

25: The Very Best Of A-ha.

It has to be pointless, so, for £2,750,

let's see how many people said The Living Daylights.

Again, it's right.

Just has to go down to zero.

Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me stopped at two.

The Living Daylights now going down through the teens.

We are into single figures again. Down it...

Six. For The Living Daylights.

Close. This is the big one for you.

OK. Two very good low scores, by the way.

However, it's only pointless answers that count in this last round.

Your third and final answer.

Crying In The Rain, the one that you thought was

probably your best shot at a pointless answer.

Again, it's an A-ha song.

We are hoping it's on that album, 25: The Best Of A-ha.

If it is, and if it is pointless, it will win £2,750 for your charities.

Let's find out. Crying In The Rain. How many people said it?

It's right. OK, well, your first answer,

Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me, took us down to two.

The Living Daylights, your next answer, took us down to six.

Crying In The Rain now takes us into single figures.

Down it goes, past the six, down it goes, passes two.

Very well done indeed!

APPLAUSE

Congratulations. Very well done indeed.

Fantastic. Crying In The Rain was a pointless answer,

which means you go home with that jackpot

of £2,750 for your charities. Brilliant.

-APPLAUSE

-Thank you.

Brilliant work and, like the showmen you are, you left the pointless answer to the last.

Terrific stuff. Genuinely been our pleasure and our honour to have two such wonderful talents on the show.

So thank you very much. I'm so glad we are sending you home with that money.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers now

in the different categories, see how well you did at home.

We will start with the Adele album.

Lots of pointless answers here.

You also could have had Love In The Dark, Million Years Ago,

Send My Love To Your New Lover and Water Under The Bridge.

All of those were pointless answers.

Well done if you said any of them. Now for George Michael.

You could have had...

You could have had An Easier Affair, Flawless, Freedom 90.

Heal The Pain was a pointless answer. Well done if you said that.

Shoot The Dog. This Is Not Real Love. All of those were pointless answers.

Well done if you said any of those. And now A-ha.

Look at the first one on this list.

Crying In The Rain winning you that money. Congratulations.

Everything apart from Take On Me, understandably,

The Sun Always Shines On TV, The Living Daylights,

Hunting High And Low, Manhattan Skyline,

Cry Wolf and Summer Moved On.

Well done if you got one at home.

Congratulations for your answer in the studio.

Thanks very much, Rich,

and thanks once again to our winning players, Don and Tim,

who go away with today's jackpot of £2,750 for their charities.

Very well done indeed.

APPLAUSE

Join us next time when we'll be putting

more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

-..and it's goodbye from me.

Goodbye.

APPLAUSE