Comedy Pointless Celebrities


Comedy

Comedy edition of the quiz, with Andi Osho, Holly Walsh, Kevin Eldon, Dave Jones, Barry Cryer, Omid Djalili, Stephen Frost and Helen Atkinson-Wood.


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Transcript


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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

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Thank you very much indeed.

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Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and a very warm welcome to this

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special comedy edition of Pointless Celebrities,

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the game where we aim for the obscure and we ignore the obvious.

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Let's meet today's Pointless celebrities.

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And couple number one.

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Hi, I'm Andi Osho, I'm a comedian and actor.

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Hi, I'm Holly Walsh.

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-I'm a comedienne!

-ANDI GASPS

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-LAUGHTER

-Yeah.

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Wow. What about that?

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-She went there.

-It's a lady comedian.

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Look at that.

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Couple number two.

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Hello, I am Kevin Eldon,

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-I am an ACTOR and comedian.

-LAUGHTER

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I'm Dave Johns.

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I'm a lady comedian and a gentleman actor.

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Couple number three.

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My name's Barry Cryer and they told me I was going to

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be with Omar Sharif,

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but I get a lot of work as a Brad Pitt lookalike.

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LAUGHTER

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My name is Omid Djalili. I'm very honoured to be Mr Cryer's partner,

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and he thought I was Omar Sharif but then he actually said that he was

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disappointed that...

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He actually thought I was Stavros Flatley. That's the...

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I didn't think that would get a laugh.

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And you were right.

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Just clap and let's move on as if that never happened.

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And, finally, couple number four.

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Hello, I'm Rick Stein,

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-a fish chef...

-LAUGHTER

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..or Sean Connery.

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You decide.

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Stephen Frost, comic improviser and actor.

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And I'm Helen Atkinson-Wood, and I am an actress,

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and I'm probably best known for doing comedy.

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Thank you very much, all of you. A very warm welcome to Pointless,

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and we'll get to chat to each of you

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throughout the show as it goes along.

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So, that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

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He gave up doing the Fringe years ago.

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He prefers a side parting these days. LAUGHTER

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It's my Pointless friend - it's Richard.

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Hiya. Hey, Everybody.

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Good evening.

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Good evening to you.

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Good evening. You did actually have a fringe once upon a time.

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-I did, yes.

-Yeah, I remember you had a fringe.

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Blimey, that's a big spoiler.

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-Yeah.

-Goodness me.

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-Yeah, a long time ago.

-Yeah.

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But enough of me. How are you?

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-Do you know what? I mustn't grumble.

-This should be fun.

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I always think when you get comics on, I always think the same thing,

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"This is going to be a very, very long recording."

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That's what I always think.

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Now, we've had some legends on this show before.

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We have had H from Steps,

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we have had the Cheeky Girls,

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we have had that guy from Made In Chelsea...

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-Do you remember that time?

-Yeah.

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But Barry Cryer! What a joy to have Barry Cryer on the show, isn't it?

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-But it should be fun, right?

-I think it should be.

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-What's the worst that can happen?

-Right.

-Yeah.

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Thank you very much indeed. Now, as always,

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all of today's questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

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Our contestants are looking for those

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all-important pointless answers.

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These are answers that none of our 100 people gave.

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Find one of those and we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

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Now, as today's show is a celebrity special,

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and each of our celebrities is playing for a charity,

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we are going to start off with a jackpot of £2,500,

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and there it is.

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Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

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Now, remember this - the pair with the highest score at the end of each

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round will be eliminated.

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Very, very best of luck. No conferring, of course,

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for the first two rounds.

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Our first category this evening is...

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Compass Points. Can you all decide in your pairs

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who's going to go first, who's going to go second,

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and whoever goes first please step up to the podium.

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OK, and the question concerns...

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-Ah...

-Oh...

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Ah... Yeah, we're going to give you a series of clues on each board,

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seven clues on each board, and all of the answers have

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a compass point somewhere in their name.

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They have the north, south, east or west somewhere in their name.

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Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

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OK, let's reveal our first board of

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things with directions in their names.

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Here come the clues...

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I'll quickly read those again.

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There we are.

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Seven clues, seven answers containing points of the compass.

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Andi, welcome to Pointless again.

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-Thank you.

-Now, Andi, you've been directing a film,

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-you've been directing a film called Amber.

-That's right. I did.

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-When did that happen?

-Well, it's still happening, actually.

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We're just still in the process of finishing it.

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-Is this your directorial debut?

-Yes, it is. Yeah.

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Are you good, do you think, behind the camera?

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Are you very patient?

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Yes, I think I am.

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I was quite nice to the actors sometimes -

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you know, I let them go home and sleep and things like that.

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Did you overrun every day?

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-Not at all?

-Yeah, overrunning would have involved having set hours.

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I see. So it was that kind of nice, relaxed schedule?

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-Yeah, we work until it's finished. Yeah.

-Very nice.

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Very nice. And still going well?

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-You're enjoying it?

-Yeah, I am.

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-Very, very, very best of luck.

-Thanks.

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Now, Andi, the questions.

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I know some of them. I know...

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Yeah, I know some of them.

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OK, I'm going to go for the second one,

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the 12 Years A Slave one.

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I think Solomon North.

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-Solomon North...

-Yes.

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..says Andi, with a little bit of hesitation.

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-Solomon North.

-Yeah, I swallowed it a bit, didn't I?

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It's got a point of the compass in it.

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Let's see if it's right, Solomon North.

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How many of our 100 people said it, if it is right?

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-Oh, no.

-Oh...

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Bad luck, Andi.

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That's an incorrect answer - scores you 100 points.

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Sorry, Andi. I'll give all the correct answers

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-at the end of the pass.

-Oh...

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Thank you very much indeed.

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Now, Kevin.

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-Hello, Xander.

-Hello, Kevin.

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-Welcome.

-Nice to be back.

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-Well...

-I brought my dad this time.

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Actually, Dave gave you your first stand-up job.

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-Is that true?

-His big break.

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-Is that really true?

-Mm-hmm.

-Yeah.

-Where was it?

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In the early '90s, he had me on, paid £5...

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It was a lot in those days.

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-Yeah.

-And in Newcastle, it was.

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I'm still very grateful to him. That's why I've had him back.

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That's why you've brought him along.

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-It wasn't a club, it was just a skip.

-Yeah.

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-In a back lane.

-Yeah, there were three people in there.

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It was an anoraky character, a sort of...

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He was, sort of, scrunched up.

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I often used to be waiting in the wings, about to go onstage,

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and security would come along and try and get me of the building.

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Cos I was in character, you know. But that was...

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Yeah, Kevin Boyle was that character's name

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that I did for a little bit.

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You see, stand-up, I could almost do stand-up in character.

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It's just terrifying otherwise.

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-Have you ever done it at all, stand-up?

-No.

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I've done after dinner speaking, which is a posh stand-up.

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It's very posh stand-up, yes.

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Posh stand-up with a lectern.

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I would love to watch that.

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-There's a challenge, Xander.

-There you go.

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I would enjoy that.

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I would see him at the Glasgow Empire, or something like that.

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-Yeah?

-That'd be nice.

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Just tales of the Oxfordshire countryside.

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LAUGHTER

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Xander Armstrong's Tales Of The Cotswolds.

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LAUGHTER

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Let's just also talk about Horace Batchelor, as well,

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your blues band...

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-My blues band...

-And the Zeebra Kittens.

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And the Zeebra Kittens. We've been together for 32 years now,

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and we once supported BB King.

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We did... We quite...

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That's the only thing I'll ever boast about, BB King and...

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Yeah, we can play a bit of blues.

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-Excellent. Now, Kevin.

-Yes.

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-To the question.

-Yeah.

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We've had one incorrect answer,

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-which takes a little bit of pressure off you.

-Yes, well, I'm...

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There are some that I think are just too easy, and the others are very,

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very difficult, but I seem to remember

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that it was West Ham who took over the Olympic Stadium,

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so I think that that first one there is probably West Ham...

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-West Ham, says Kevin.

-..United.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people said West Ham.

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It's right.

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Look at that. 50.

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-Exactly halfway down, there, Kevin.

-Yeah.

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-Very good indeed.

-Not bad.

-APPLAUSE

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Well played, Kevin. Yeah, now called the London Stadium.

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They were at Upton Park for 112 years before that.

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It seemed longer, to me.

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Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

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Omid, a warm welcome to Pointless.

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-Nice to have you.

-Nice to be here. Thank you.

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There are various comedians who also have acting careers

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that have, kind of, splintered off from their comedy,

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and I would say your acting career is of

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an altogether different calibre.

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I mean, your CV in acting terms...

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You've been part of huge films like The Mummy and Gladiator.

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You did that lovely TV adaptation of My Family And Other Animals.

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And what are you up to at the moment?

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Have you got any exciting projects?

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Yes, I'm touring a show called Schmuck For A Night,

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a stand-up show,

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and I'm also promoting my documentary We Are Many,

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which Andi very kindly saw and appreciated, so...

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See, that's right. There's a new departure for you there

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in serious documentary-making.

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-Do you enjoy it?

-Yeah, it's about the anti-war demonstrations of 2003,

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which were 800-strong in 800 different cities,

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and it's basically one of those non-political films

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about people power.

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Right you are. Omid, what would you like to go for on our board here?

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I would like to go for the TV drama broadcast from '99 to 2006

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created by Aaron Sorkin, which I think is The West Wing.

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The West Wing, says Omid.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people agree with Omid, The West Wing.

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It's right. 100 was our high score - you've passed that.

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50's our low score, and you've passed that.

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Down it goes. Good stuff. 37 for West Wing.

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-Ah, 37.

-That's all right.

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I'll have that, I'll have that.

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-Very good.

-Very well played, Omid.

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Now, if you put Pointless and The West Wing together,

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between us we've won 26 Emmys.

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Wow. We are doing some of the heavy lifting there, aren't we?

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-Isn't that amazing?

-Yeah.

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That is... When you think... God, I mean, it's crazy.

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-Yeah.

-God, it's quite humbling, isn't it?

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-Isn't it?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, between us.

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-Yeah. 26.

-Yeah.

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RICHARD WHISTLES Very good.

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Helen, welcome to Pointless.

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-Thank you.

-Very good to have you here.

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Known to many, I should think, for Mrs Miggins.

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I guess so, but I...

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But also, let's just talk a bit about Radio Active -

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hugely popular in the 1980s,

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and then it went on to be KYTV,

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and then I suppose everyone just did so well they, sort of,

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went off and did their own things.

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Well, I'd like to think so, yeah.

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We certainly had our own individual careers for a while.

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It's probably because of the fact that we're, you know, great friends

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and we've all been on holiday together, and we're all, you know,

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each other's godparents, and we all spend Christmas together,

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that we just thought we would...

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-SHE BLOWS AIR

-..you know, dust off Radio Active

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and run it up the flagpole, and we took it up to

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the Edinburgh Festival, and people seemed to like it quite a lot.

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That's such lovely news. So, how...? It went well?

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-Yes, yes, yes.

-And what is going to be happening next?

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Well, we're going to have a meeting on Thursday,

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so I'll have to come back another time

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-and tell you what happened.

-That's exciting.

-But I think...

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I've just been speaking to Steve about the wonderment of

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even performing at the Glastonbury Festival,

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and I think we might, you know,

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go to some festivals or something like that.

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-Brilliant.

-Thank you.

-That's fabulous news.

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Now, Helen, this board is all yours,

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if you wanted to talk us through it and fill in all the blanks...

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Right. The one that's leaping off the board in my direction,

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probably because I love the Tube map as, you know,

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as a fabulous piece of artwork, and I also live on the...

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On the Northern line, which is the London Underground line

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coloured black on the standard Tube map.

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That's my answer.

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The Northern line, says Helen.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people said the Northern line.

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Well, you've beaten our high score.

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The low score is still 37.

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Oh, and you join them. Look at that.

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-Hooray!

-Very cosy there...

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on number 37.

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-Very well done, Helen.

-Well played, Helen.

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Now, let's clear up the rest of this board.

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Andi, incredibly unlucky.

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You went for a risk and you were two letters away from

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a correct answer there.

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-Is it North...?

-Solomon Northup.

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-Yes.

-Yeah, I'm so sorry.

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It would have scored you 1 point as well -

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far and away the best answer on the board.

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That's really, really unlucky.

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The BBC soap opera is, of course...

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-EastEnders.

-..EastEnders.

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That would have scored you 79.

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The first name of Kanye and Kim's daughter?

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-North.

-North.

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Yep. That would have scored 27.

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And so you've got the faces of the four presidents.

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Now, this is a low-scorer, simply because...

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South Dakota is the answer.

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South Dakota is the right answer, yep,

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and that would have scored you 7 points.

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There we are. Thank you very much indeed.

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We're halfway through the round.

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Let's take a quick recap of those scores.

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37 was the lowest score of the pass.

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Very well done, Helen and Omid.

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It puts both your pairs right at the top of the table, there.

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Then we travel up to 50, where we find Kevin and Dave.

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And then 100, Andi and Holly -

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-undeservedly, really.

-In a parallel universe, we're winning.

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-So, whatevs.

-Yeah.

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LAUGHTER Yeah.

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OK, right, we're going to come back down the line now.

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Can the second players please step up to the podium?

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OK. Shall we put seven more points of the compass up on the board?

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Here they are. Seven more clues.

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Let me read those all one last time.

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Stephen, welcome.

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-Thank you.

-Welcome to you.

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I'd never spotted the Rick Stein before.

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-Yeah, I get it all the time.

-Yeah, of course.

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Yeah, I've... My parents used to live down in Cornwall...

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-Exactly.

-..near Mousehole, and I've been to a restaurant there

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three times, and when I ask for the bill they say,

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"You don't have to pay, Mr Stein.

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"How were the prawns?"

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And I always say, "Well, give me another bottle of white wine

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"and I'll tell you exactly how the prawns are."

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It happens all the time.

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-Which is exactly what Rick Stein would say.

-Yeah.

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Now, you compere Bestival.

0:15:380:15:40

Well, I just... Rob Da Bank used to live round the corner from me.

0:15:400:15:44

-He's the guy who sets it up.

-Yeah.

0:15:440:15:45

I have a VW camper van and he has a VW camper van,

0:15:450:15:47

so we started talking about that,

0:15:470:15:48

but the great thing is I get to introduce heavy metal bands,

0:15:480:15:52

Major Lazer, Hot Chip,

0:15:520:15:55

Stevie Wonder, but the best gig I ever did was

0:15:550:15:57

Bestival on the Isle of Wight -

0:15:570:15:58

I had to introduce the Chuckle Brothers.

0:15:580:16:01

And they were brilliant.

0:16:030:16:04

And the reason why me and Mark started in comedy

0:16:040:16:06

all those years ago was to get rid of people like that.

0:16:060:16:09

It didn't work, and I'm glad it didn't,

0:16:090:16:10

cos they did 20 minutes of "To you, to me, to me, to you" -

0:16:100:16:14

20 minutes, big laughs, 14,000 people.

0:16:140:16:17

I learnt so much.

0:16:170:16:19

-Yes.

-That's amazing.

0:16:190:16:21

-Yeah.

-That is amazing.

0:16:210:16:22

-Anyway, Stephen, there you are. You're on 37.

-Right.

0:16:220:16:25

If you can possibly score 62 or less,

0:16:250:16:27

-you won't even become high scorers after a second answer.

-Right.

0:16:270:16:30

Well, I know quite a few of those answers,

0:16:300:16:32

but those will be the obvious ones, so I'm going to go...

0:16:320:16:36

The bottom one I know, so I'm going to go for...

0:16:360:16:39

And it's the 1959 film,

0:16:390:16:41

the Hitchcock one about, I think it's Cary Grant on the run,

0:16:410:16:44

it's called North By Northwest.

0:16:440:16:45

-North By Northwest, says Stephen.

-Yeah.

0:16:450:16:47

Let's see if it's right and how many of our 100 people said it.

0:16:470:16:50

There is your red line. Get below that, you're into the next round.

0:16:500:16:53

Yup, very well done.

0:16:560:16:58

-29...

-That's good.

0:17:000:17:01

APPLAUSE ..takes your total up to 66.

0:17:010:17:03

Well played. Yeah, Cary Grant, as you say.

0:17:040:17:05

That's packing an awful lot of compass points

0:17:050:17:07

-into one answer, that, isn't it?

-Isn't it?

-Goodness me.

0:17:070:17:10

-Barry.

-Yes.

-Welcome to Pointless.

0:17:110:17:13

-Thank you.

-Lovely to have you here.

0:17:130:17:15

Now, Barry, you have been involved closely involved in comedy

0:17:150:17:18

right the way through so many different periods of it -

0:17:180:17:21

the satire boom in the '60s,

0:17:210:17:23

the sketch comedy in the '70s...

0:17:230:17:25

Yes.

0:17:250:17:26

Kenny Everett, The Two Ronnies...

0:17:260:17:29

Right the way through.

0:17:290:17:30

Do you have a favourite era of comedy?

0:17:300:17:32

Is there any era you would say was the golden era? Maybe now?

0:17:320:17:35

My favourite comedy era is now.

0:17:350:17:37

-Good.

-I like talking about the past. I don't want to live there.

0:17:370:17:40

I think there's so much talent around now.

0:17:400:17:42

I've just been up doing the Fringe again, at my advanced age,

0:17:420:17:46

and there's so much talent around.

0:17:460:17:48

I had a marvellous time back in the '60s and '70s, and it was great,

0:17:480:17:53

but I refuse to go,

0:17:530:17:54

"Golden age, oh, those were the days,"

0:17:540:17:56

as if there's nothing around now.

0:17:560:17:58

There's more good comedy around now than there ever was.

0:17:580:18:01

-It's brilliant.

-Well said, fantastic.

0:18:010:18:03

Now, Barry, you're on 37.

0:18:030:18:05

Our high scorers are still Holly and Andi on 100,

0:18:050:18:08

so 62 or less gets you through.

0:18:080:18:11

Yes?

0:18:110:18:13

The complex on the River Thames that includes the Royal Festival Hall

0:18:130:18:17

and Hayward Gallery.

0:18:170:18:19

-Is...

-Southbank.

0:18:190:18:21

Southbank, says Barry.

0:18:210:18:22

OK, here is your red line.

0:18:220:18:24

If you can get below this red line with Southbank,

0:18:240:18:27

you are through to the next round.

0:18:270:18:28

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Southbank.

0:18:280:18:31

He's right.

0:18:340:18:35

Through you go to Round Two.

0:18:360:18:38

Oh.

0:18:380:18:39

-Whoa!

-29...

0:18:390:18:40

Nice one.

0:18:400:18:41

..taking your total up to 66.

0:18:410:18:44

There you are, again, exactly the same score as Stephen and Helen.

0:18:440:18:48

Well played, Barry. Built in 1951 for the Festival of Britain.

0:18:480:18:52

If there was a monologue in the opening ceremony,

0:18:520:18:54

I imagine you wrote it.

0:18:540:18:55

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

0:18:580:19:00

Now then, Dave...

0:19:000:19:02

-Hello.

-Dave, there you are on 50.

0:19:020:19:04

Now, Dave, you've had an extraordinary

0:19:040:19:06

and extremely successful career.

0:19:060:19:09

You've been a compere, you've been a club compere...

0:19:090:19:13

You've also... You adapted The Shawshank Redemption.

0:19:130:19:15

Yeah, me and another comic, Owen O'Neill,

0:19:150:19:17

we adapted the stage adaptation of it, yeah.

0:19:170:19:20

And that's been touring... Is it still touring?

0:19:200:19:22

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it tours every autumn,

0:19:220:19:24

-so that's quite nice.

-So it started in Dublin,

0:19:240:19:26

and then it came into the West End...

0:19:260:19:28

Yeah, and now it's out on tour, so it's... Yeah...

0:19:280:19:30

Have you heard, Dave? The cast have escaped.

0:19:300:19:32

Really?

0:19:320:19:34

But, also, you've been part of this brilliant revival

0:19:340:19:37

up at the Edinburgh Festival where 12 Angry Men

0:19:370:19:39

-and One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest were done.

-Yeah.

0:19:390:19:42

But then, now, you've been doing this Ken Loach film.

0:19:420:19:44

Yeah, I just starred in the new Ken Loach film, yeah, which was amazing.

0:19:440:19:47

-Yeah.

-It's been garlanded with praise everywhere it goes.

0:19:470:19:50

-It has, yes.

-It's won all sorts of awards.

0:19:500:19:52

-It won the Palme d'Or in Cannes.

-It did. Yeah, it did.

0:19:520:19:54

That was pretty much a shock, you know?

0:19:540:19:56

I mean, Cannes was just crazy.

0:19:560:19:58

I'd never been to any place like that before.

0:19:580:20:00

It's all, sort of, you know, motorcades

0:20:000:20:02

and, sort of, darked-out limousines and red carpets.

0:20:020:20:05

-It was crazy.

-Very exciting indeed.

0:20:050:20:07

Anyway, now Dave, we have a game on our hands here.

0:20:070:20:10

You are on 50. If you can score 49 or less,

0:20:100:20:13

you are definitely through to the next round.

0:20:130:20:16

Yeah, OK.

0:20:160:20:17

Well, there's a couple of high ones there, I think.

0:20:170:20:20

I'll go for the Jake Gyllenhaal film...

0:20:210:20:27

which is Southpaw.

0:20:270:20:29

Southpaw.

0:20:290:20:31

Southpaw, says Dave. Here is your red line.

0:20:310:20:33

If you get below that with Southpaw,

0:20:330:20:35

you're through to the next round.

0:20:350:20:36

How many of our 100 people said Southpaw?

0:20:360:20:38

It's right.

0:20:400:20:41

Gets you through.

0:20:440:20:45

And it's a lovely low score.

0:20:470:20:48

Look at that, lowest score of the round. 12 for Southpaw,

0:20:480:20:50

taking your total up to 62.

0:20:500:20:52

Very well played, Dave.

0:20:530:20:54

Yeah, he's incredibly fit in that film and he plays a boxer.

0:20:540:20:57

The role was originally meant for Eminem, unbelievably,

0:20:570:21:00

and he had to pull out, so it went to Jake Gyllenhaal.

0:21:000:21:02

Wouldn't think the two of them would share any roles.

0:21:020:21:04

No. Interchangeable? Not really.

0:21:040:21:06

-Yeah.

-That's interesting, Holly.

0:21:060:21:08

-Isn't it?

-Now, you went into comedy having worked in an art gallery.

0:21:080:21:12

-Yeah.

-Well-worn path, obviously(!)

0:21:120:21:14

-Yeah, the traditional way(!)

-Yeah.

0:21:140:21:16

What was the lure?

0:21:160:21:17

What called you into comedy?

0:21:170:21:19

I was just fed up with working with artists

0:21:190:21:22

who got to say and do whatever they wanted,

0:21:220:21:24

and I thought, "I want to do that,"

0:21:240:21:25

so I became a comedian,

0:21:250:21:27

and it, sort of, worked out.

0:21:270:21:30

I tell you what hasn't worked out, though, I'm afraid,

0:21:320:21:34

is your Pointless debut.

0:21:340:21:36

-I'm afraid your score...

-But that wasn't...

0:21:360:21:37

That was entirely down to my, erm...

0:21:370:21:39

Yeah.

0:21:390:21:41

-I made this.

-LAUGHTER

0:21:410:21:44

Now then, you are...

0:21:440:21:45

Yes, I'm afraid we'll have to say goodbye to you

0:21:450:21:47

at the end of this round, but you have this board.

0:21:470:21:49

If you wanted to, you could fill in all those blanks

0:21:490:21:52

and leave in a blaze of glory.

0:21:520:21:54

-Yeah, I could do that...

-Yeah.

-..but I can't...

0:21:540:21:56

-OK.

-..because I don't know the answers to most of them.

0:21:560:21:59

Any ones you want to have... Volunteer an answer?

0:21:590:22:01

I'll do the old... The bottom one, cos that's my era.

0:22:010:22:04

Well, it was...

0:22:040:22:05

-East 17 is the answer.

-East 17.

0:22:050:22:07

East 17, says Holly.

0:22:070:22:08

No red line for you, as I'm afraid you're already our high-scorers.

0:22:080:22:10

Let's see how many of our 100 people said East 17.

0:22:100:22:13

Oh, look at that. Look at what you could have won.

0:22:180:22:20

38, Holly...

0:22:200:22:22

takes your total up to 138.

0:22:220:22:24

Oh, so you would have scored 39.

0:22:250:22:27

It would have been the lowest score of the whole round if you'd just got

0:22:270:22:30

those two extra letters on there.

0:22:300:22:32

Oh, well, there we are.

0:22:320:22:33

Two letters away from the second round. I am sorry.

0:22:330:22:35

Let's take a look at the rest of these, shall we?

0:22:350:22:37

The common name for aurora borealis?

0:22:370:22:39

-Northern lights.

-Northern lights.

0:22:390:22:41

That would have scored you 59 points.

0:22:410:22:44

Now, I bet you don't know this duo.

0:22:440:22:46

I loved them. I like it when they have duos on X Factor.

0:22:460:22:48

-South?

-Journey South.

0:22:480:22:50

-Oh!

-Journey South, there you go.

-Journey South.

0:22:500:22:53

-Four points. They had a number-one album, Journey South.

-No!

0:22:530:22:56

How about that? And the US actor and director...

0:22:560:22:59

-Clint Eastwood.

-Clint Eastwood,

0:22:590:23:00

and that would have scored you 56 points.

0:23:000:23:03

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

0:23:030:23:05

So, at the end of our first round,

0:23:050:23:06

I'm afraid the pair we have to say goodbye to,

0:23:060:23:08

with our high score of 138,

0:23:080:23:09

Holly and Andi, it is you.

0:23:090:23:10

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

0:23:100:23:12

You'll just have to come back and win next time.

0:23:120:23:15

-Come back without me.

-No...

-Come back together.

0:23:150:23:17

Come back together and win.

0:23:170:23:19

I mean, nothing wrong with your answers apart from two letters,

0:23:190:23:21

as Richard says. Lovely having you here.

0:23:210:23:23

I'm afraid it's far too soon to be sending you away,

0:23:230:23:25

-but send you away we must.

-Thank you.

0:23:250:23:27

But come back, as I say. Thanks so much, Holly and Andi.

0:23:270:23:29

But, for the remaining three pairs, it is now time for Round Two.

0:23:320:23:35

And so, suddenly, we are down to three pairs

0:23:390:23:41

and at the end of this round, we will have to be down to two pairs

0:23:410:23:44

in time for our head-to-head round.

0:23:440:23:45

This is very close indeed.

0:23:450:23:47

Omid and Barry, Helen and Stephen,

0:23:470:23:49

you were absolutely drawn at the halfway point of the last round,

0:23:490:23:53

and absolutely drawn at the end, as well. Spooky!

0:23:530:23:56

And, Dave and Kevin, only four points ahead of them.

0:23:560:23:59

But, Dave, very well done -

0:23:590:24:00

Southpaw, the best score of the whole round, so that was fantastic.

0:24:000:24:02

Best of luck to all three pairs.

0:24:020:24:04

Our category for Round Two this evening is...

0:24:040:24:06

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

0:24:080:24:11

who's going to go second, and whoever's going first,

0:24:110:24:13

please step up to the podium.

0:24:130:24:14

And the question concerns...

0:24:180:24:20

Companions in the TV series Doctor Who. Richard...

0:24:250:24:28

Yeah, we're about to show you a board with 16 pictures on it,

0:24:280:24:31

all of whom are actors who have been a companion

0:24:310:24:33

to Doctor Who at some point.

0:24:330:24:35

We just need you to name the most obscure actor

0:24:350:24:37

you can see up here, please.

0:24:370:24:38

So, we're looking for the name of the actors you're about to see.

0:24:380:24:41

OK, thank you very much indeed.

0:24:410:24:42

So we're going to put up this image, as Richard said,

0:24:420:24:45

that has 16 companions of Doctor Who.

0:24:450:24:47

We just need to know the names of the actors,

0:24:470:24:49

and there are those actors.

0:24:490:24:52

There we go.

0:24:560:24:59

Kevin.

0:25:010:25:02

KEVIN GULPS

0:25:020:25:04

Yes, that's...

0:25:040:25:06

Erm...

0:25:060:25:07

That's quite tricky, isn't it?

0:25:070:25:09

You've got to be a Whovian.

0:25:090:25:10

Is that what they're called?

0:25:100:25:12

-A Whovian.

-A Whovian to know some of those.

0:25:120:25:15

A Whovian?

0:25:150:25:16

I... OK, I'm going to go for one.

0:25:160:25:19

I think, probably, third along,

0:25:190:25:22

second down, Elisabeth Sladen.

0:25:220:25:25

Elisabeth Sladen, says Kevin.

0:25:260:25:29

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Elisabeth Sladen.

0:25:290:25:31

It's right,

0:25:350:25:37

and I think that's going to be a very good score.

0:25:370:25:39

Down it goes. Elisabeth Sladen taking you down into single figures.

0:25:390:25:42

7. Very well done indeed, Kevin. What a start to the round.

0:25:420:25:45

7 for Elisabeth Sladen.

0:25:450:25:46

Well played, Kevin. Yeah, she played Sarah Jane Smith.

0:25:470:25:50

Of course, you worked alongside...

0:25:500:25:51

I did, yeah. Thank you very much, Richard.

0:25:510:25:54

Now, then, Barry. Barry, if you like,

0:25:540:25:56

you don't have to identify which of

0:25:560:25:57

the companions you're talking about.

0:25:570:25:59

You can just throw a name out there,

0:25:590:26:01

if it makes it any easier.

0:26:010:26:03

-So it's...

-Carole Ann Ford.

0:26:030:26:04

Carole Ann Ford.

0:26:040:26:06

Carole Ann Ford. Let's see if that's right,

0:26:060:26:08

and let's see how many of our 100 people said Carole Ann Ford.

0:26:080:26:10

It's right.

0:26:130:26:14

APPLAUSE One for Carole Ann Ford!

0:26:200:26:22

Very well done indeed, Barry.

0:26:220:26:24

Well, that was quite impressive, wasn't it?

0:26:300:26:32

-That was impressive.

-Yeah, she's in the very first episode.

0:26:320:26:34

Played William Hartnell's granddaughter, Susan Foreman.

0:26:340:26:37

Thanks very much. Now, Helen...

0:26:370:26:40

If only I'd watched more Doctor Who.

0:26:400:26:42

And I know that obscurity

0:26:420:26:45

is the way forward...

0:26:450:26:47

Yes.

0:26:470:26:48

..but I'm really struggling with this round.

0:26:480:26:50

OK, but I'm going to nominate, obviously, Catherine Tate,

0:26:500:26:55

because she is such a fantastic comedy actress,

0:26:550:26:57

and this is a comedy show,

0:26:570:26:59

and she was fabulous with David Tennant

0:26:590:27:01

as his sidekick on Doctor Who, so Catherine Tate.

0:27:010:27:03

Catherine Tate is your answer. Helen says Catherine Tate.

0:27:030:27:06

How many of our 100 people said Catherine Tate?

0:27:060:27:09

It's right.

0:27:120:27:13

39.

0:27:150:27:16

-I like 39.

-39 for Catherine Tate.

0:27:160:27:20

Well played. Yeah, she played Donna Noble -

0:27:200:27:22

as you say, was a companion to David Tennant.

0:27:220:27:24

Thanks very much. We're halfway through the round.

0:27:240:27:26

Let's look at those scores, starting with the lowest score

0:27:260:27:28

of the pass, Barry, which is yours. Very well done.

0:27:280:27:30

Carole Ann Ford, great answer. 1 point.

0:27:300:27:32

7 is where we find Kevin and Dave.

0:27:320:27:33

39, Helen and Stephen -

0:27:330:27:36

a little bit ahead there.

0:27:360:27:37

Stephen, let's have a nice low-scoring answer from you.

0:27:370:27:39

Good luck with that. We'll come back down the line.

0:27:390:27:42

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

0:27:420:27:44

So, Stephen...

0:27:470:27:48

I hid behind the sofa when all

0:27:500:27:53

the ones in black and white were on,

0:27:530:27:55

so I didn't see the credits.

0:27:550:27:56

I'm going to go for

0:27:560:27:58

Sue Jamieson.

0:27:580:28:00

-Sue Jameson.

-Oh, yes.

0:28:000:28:01

Sue Jameson, says Stephen.

0:28:010:28:03

No red line, as you're the high-scorers at the moment.

0:28:030:28:05

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Sue Jameson.

0:28:050:28:07

-GROANING

-What?

-What?!

-What?!

0:28:110:28:14

I'm lost for words.

0:28:140:28:15

I'm afraid Sue Jameson is an incorrect answer,

0:28:150:28:17

so I'm afraid it takes your total up to 139.

0:28:170:28:20

Yeah, sorry, Stephen. Not Sue Jameson, I'm afraid.

0:28:200:28:22

Even though Barry Cryer definitely went, "Oh, yes," when you said it.

0:28:220:28:25

Thanks very much indeed.

0:28:280:28:29

Omid...

0:28:290:28:31

I recognise a lot of them

0:28:310:28:32

but only by the character names.

0:28:320:28:34

and I'm going to go easy -

0:28:340:28:36

I'll just go Billie Piper.

0:28:360:28:37

Billie Piper, says Omid.

0:28:370:28:38

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Billie Piper.

0:28:380:28:40

No red line - you're already through.

0:28:400:28:42

Yeah, exactly.

0:28:470:28:49

APPLAUSE 62 takes your total up to 63.

0:28:490:28:51

Yeah, safe and sound. Like so many people who appear in Doctor Who,

0:28:520:28:55

a genuinely wonderful actor, Billie Piper.

0:28:550:28:57

A big scorer as well. Played Rose Tyler.

0:28:570:29:00

-Thank you very much. Now, Dave...

-Right...

0:29:000:29:03

I stopped watching Doctor Who in about the late '60s,

0:29:030:29:07

but I'd say...

0:29:070:29:10

Peter Purves.

0:29:100:29:12

Peter Purves, says Dave.

0:29:120:29:14

Peter Purves.

0:29:140:29:15

No red line - you're already through.

0:29:150:29:17

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Peter Purves.

0:29:170:29:19

It's right.

0:29:210:29:23

Look at that, down to 6!

0:29:270:29:29

Very well done indeed.

0:29:290:29:30

Takes your total up to 13.

0:29:310:29:33

He's quite difficult to recognise there, isn't he?

0:29:340:29:37

I wonder if people got him just from the picture.

0:29:370:29:39

Now, let's fill in the rest of these, shall we?

0:29:390:29:41

The top row, you've got Jenna Coleman,

0:29:410:29:44

who would have scored you 14.

0:29:440:29:45

Next to Jenna Coleman, it's Louise Jameson.

0:29:450:29:49

-Louise Jameson, not Sue Jameson.

-Oh, that's it...

0:29:490:29:51

She would have scored you 10.

0:29:510:29:53

Nicola Bryant, she would have scored you 1.

0:29:530:29:56

Next row, Freema Agyeman.

0:29:570:30:01

Freema Agyeman would have scored 4 points.

0:30:010:30:03

Next to Elisabeth Sladen, there, is Katy Manning,

0:30:030:30:06

who would have scored you 1.

0:30:060:30:07

Very good answer if you'd have said that.

0:30:070:30:09

Next to Catherine Tate,

0:30:090:30:10

you've got Bonnie Langford -

0:30:100:30:12

she would have scored 38.

0:30:120:30:14

John Barrowman, he would have scored you 30.

0:30:140:30:16

I would've thought he'd scored more than that,

0:30:160:30:18

but the picture maybe doesn't quite look like him.

0:30:180:30:20

Sarah Sutton would have scored you 1.

0:30:200:30:22

The bottom row, Lalla Ward -

0:30:220:30:25

she would've scored you 3 points.

0:30:250:30:27

Arthur Darvill would have scored 3 points,

0:30:270:30:29

and Mary Tamm would have scored you 1.

0:30:290:30:31

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

0:30:330:30:34

So, at the end of our second round,

0:30:340:30:36

the pair we have to say goodbye to - high score of 139 -

0:30:360:30:38

Stephen and Helen, I am afraid it is you.

0:30:380:30:41

It's been lovely having you on the show.

0:30:410:30:42

Thank you for coming to play. Please come and play again.

0:30:420:30:45

But, in the meantime, thank you so much, Stephen and Helen.

0:30:450:30:48

But, for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

0:30:510:30:54

Well, congratulations, Dave and Kevin, Omid and Barry.

0:30:570:31:00

You are now one step closer to the final

0:31:000:31:01

and a chance to play for that jackpot,

0:31:010:31:03

which currently stands at £2,500.

0:31:030:31:06

This is where we decide who goes through and plays for that jackpot.

0:31:080:31:11

We do it by making you go head-to-head.

0:31:110:31:13

The difference is, you can now start playing as pairs.

0:31:130:31:15

You can chat, you can confer before you give your answers.

0:31:150:31:18

It takes a bit of pressure off, I think, does it not, Omid?

0:31:180:31:20

-It does.

-This is good. The first players to win

0:31:200:31:22

two questions will play for the jackpot.

0:31:220:31:24

I think this will be very close.

0:31:240:31:26

Two fantastic pairs, so best of luck to both pairs.

0:31:260:31:28

Let's play the head-to-head.

0:31:280:31:30

Here is your first question, and it concerns...

0:31:360:31:39

Obviously!

0:31:410:31:42

We are now going to play you five extracts from songs,

0:31:420:31:45

all of which have an item of food in their title.

0:31:450:31:48

We need you to tell us the artist behind each of the songs, please.

0:31:480:31:52

OK, yes, who are the artists behind each of these songs?

0:31:520:31:56

Let's have a listen, here is song A.

0:31:560:31:59

# Jambalaya and crawfish pie and file gumbo

0:31:590:32:03

# For tonight I'm gonna see my ma cher amio

0:32:030:32:08

# Pick guitar, fill fruit jar and be gay-o

0:32:080:32:13

# Son of a gun, we'll have big fun on the bayou... #

0:32:130:32:19

Here's song B.

0:32:190:32:21

# I started singin'

0:32:210:32:22

# Bye-bye, Miss American Pie

0:32:220:32:26

# Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry

0:32:260:32:30

# And good ol' boys were drinking whiskey and rye

0:32:300:32:34

# Singin' this'll be the day that I die

0:32:340:32:38

# This'll be the day that I die... #

0:32:380:32:40

Here is song C.

0:32:400:32:42

# The DJ that he knows well on the spot always around 12

0:32:420:32:45

# Plays the mix that Diego mezcla con la salsa, y la baila

0:32:450:32:49

# And he dances y la canta

0:32:490:32:52

# Asereje ja de je de jebe

0:32:520:32:55

# Tu de jebere seibiunouva, majavi an de bugui an de buididipi... #

0:32:550:33:00

Here's D.

0:33:000:33:02

# All I need is for you to come home

0:33:020:33:06

# You're sweet like chocolate, boy

0:33:060:33:09

# You're sweet like chocolate

0:33:090:33:13

# You bring me so much joy

0:33:130:33:17

# You're sweet like chocolate, boy... #

0:33:170:33:21

And here is E.

0:33:220:33:24

# Vindaloo, vindaloo

0:33:240:33:27

# And we all like vindaloo

0:33:270:33:31

# We're England

0:33:310:33:32

# We're gonna score one more than you

0:33:320:33:40

# England! #

0:33:400:33:41

OK, there we are. Dave and Kevin, you're our low scorers,

0:33:410:33:44

so you will go first - feel free to confer.

0:33:440:33:46

Yeah, we'll go for...

0:33:460:33:48

-The first one, was it?

-Yes.

-A.

0:33:500:33:53

The Carpenters.

0:33:530:33:54

The Carpenters for A.

0:33:540:33:56

A, The Carpenters. Now, Omid and Barry.

0:33:560:33:59

Over to you.

0:33:590:34:00

I think C is a girl group.

0:34:000:34:04

I think their name was Ketchup, I'm not 100% sure.

0:34:040:34:08

-Oh, yes.

-We do know that E is Keith Allen's football...England song.

0:34:080:34:13

I can't think who... I mean, B was the cover of Don McLean's song.

0:34:130:34:18

Yeah, we couldn't get the cover of American Pie.

0:34:180:34:21

-And D, I can't think who that was.

-No.

0:34:210:34:24

-OK, they've gone for A, shall we go for Keith Allen?

-Yes.

0:34:240:34:28

Fat Les, Keith Allen. I know Keith Allen, that was his song.

0:34:280:34:32

-Keith Allen, Fat Les.

-Yes.

0:34:320:34:33

-Let's go Keith Allen, Fat Les.

-I'll go with you on that.

-OK.

0:34:330:34:36

So, Dave and Kevin have gone for The Carpenters for A.

0:34:360:34:40

Let's see if that's right.

0:34:400:34:42

Let's see how many of our 100 people said The Carpenters.

0:34:420:34:44

16.

0:34:540:34:55

Omid and Barry, meanwhile, have gone for Keith Allen and Fat Les.

0:35:000:35:05

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of

0:35:050:35:07

our 100 people said that.

0:35:070:35:08

-Oh!

-14.

0:35:180:35:19

14, which means, Omid and Barry, after one question, you are up 1-0.

0:35:230:35:28

Yeah, Fat Les, Keith Allen was their singer.

0:35:280:35:30

There was also Alex James and Damien Hirst in that band.

0:35:300:35:33

Now, let's fill in the rest of these, shall we?

0:35:330:35:35

B, have a little listen to that.

0:35:350:35:37

# I started singin'... #

0:35:370:35:39

As you say, it's a cover of American Pie.

0:35:390:35:41

The biggest score on the board, actually, because it's by Madonna.

0:35:410:35:43

Madonna's cover of American Pie would have scored you 33.

0:35:430:35:46

JC, not a million miles away -

0:35:500:35:51

it's got Ketchup in the name. It's Las Ketchup.

0:35:510:35:53

Spanish band, Las Ketchup.

0:35:530:35:55

Would have scored you 7 points.

0:35:560:35:58

And let's listen to a little bit of D.

0:35:590:36:02

# All I need is for you to come home... #

0:36:020:36:05

-Now, it's Sweet Like Chocolate.

-Sweet Like Chocolate.

0:36:050:36:07

And it's a band named after our nicknames,

0:36:070:36:10

it's Shanks and Bigfoot.

0:36:100:36:11

It's a pointless answer, so very well done if you said that.

0:36:120:36:15

-You all right, Shanks?

-Yeah, not so bad, BF.

0:36:150:36:18

There we are.

0:36:180:36:20

Thanks very much indeed. So, here comes your second question.

0:36:200:36:23

Dave and Kevin, you have to win this one to stay in the game.

0:36:230:36:27

Our second question is all about...

0:36:270:36:29

Oh, boy!

0:36:310:36:33

Yes, we're going to show you five tabloid-style headlines now

0:36:340:36:36

which outline plots from different soap operas.

0:36:360:36:39

Can you tell us which soap operas these plots were taken from, please?

0:36:390:36:42

Thank you very much indeed.

0:36:420:36:44

OK, let's reveal our five tabloid soap-opera plots,

0:36:440:36:46

and we have got...

0:36:460:36:48

OK, so there we are, five tabloid soap plots there.

0:37:180:37:23

Omid and Barry will go first.

0:37:230:37:26

OK. I did not know 1955, that one, but you did.

0:37:260:37:30

I think that's pretty obscure.

0:37:300:37:33

Farmer's son's wife in tragic attempt to rescue horse!

0:37:330:37:37

-Do you want to go for that?

-What do you think it is?

-What?

0:37:370:37:40

If I say it, we are committed, aren't we?

0:37:400:37:42

-OK...

-Farmer's son's wife in tragic attempt to rescue horse is the...

0:37:420:37:46

Is The Archers, it's Grace Archer.

0:37:460:37:49

OK, The Archers, say Omid and Barry for B.

0:37:490:37:52

Now then, Dave and Kevin, talk us through the rest of the board.

0:37:540:37:57

Right, um...

0:37:570:37:59

Oil baron thought dead found alive in shower is...

0:37:590:38:02

That's Dallas. Yorkshire village pub floods during siege -

0:38:020:38:06

Emmerdale. Melbourne Labrador dreams of marriage to bog next...

0:38:060:38:09

BOG next door?!

0:38:090:38:11

-That's Neighbours, is it?

-Yeah, Neighbours.

0:38:110:38:14

And, Merseyside patio excavation reveals grisly secret - Brookside.

0:38:140:38:19

-Yes, Brookside.

-We're going to go for C...

0:38:190:38:22

-Brookside.

-Brookside.

0:38:220:38:23

OK, Brookside, C, say Dave and Kevin.

0:38:230:38:26

So we have The Archers and we have Brookside.

0:38:260:38:28

Omid and Barry went for The Archers for B. Let's see if that's right,

0:38:280:38:32

let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

0:38:320:38:34

It's right.

0:38:360:38:38

Look at that - 10 for The Archers. Good answer, there.

0:38:430:38:46

APPLAUSE

0:38:460:38:48

Dave and Kevin, meanwhile, have gone for Brookside for C.

0:38:500:38:55

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Brookside.

0:38:550:38:59

It's right.

0:39:010:39:03

38...for Brookside. APPLAUSE

0:39:060:39:09

Which means, very well done, Omid and Barry, after only two questions,

0:39:090:39:13

you're through to the final 2-0.

0:39:130:39:14

Yes, well played, Barry, it's a terrific answer. Grace Archer.

0:39:140:39:17

In fact, it was on the same night as ITV launched -

0:39:170:39:19

it was designed to spoil the launch of ITV, the death of Grace Archer.

0:39:190:39:22

You went for the best answer of the other ones you could have

0:39:220:39:25

gone for, gents. You knew them all, I think.

0:39:250:39:27

Dallas is A, Dallas would have scored you...

0:39:270:39:29

..53.

0:39:300:39:31

You'd have got 41 for when Bouncer dreamt of marriage

0:39:330:39:37

to the dog next door in Neighbours, Joe Mangel's dog.

0:39:370:39:39

41. And 55 for Emmerdale.

0:39:390:39:42

Thanks very much indeed.

0:39:440:39:46

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

0:39:460:39:49

I'm afraid, Dave and Kevin.

0:39:490:39:51

I'm so sorry. Fantastic play the whole way through the game.

0:39:510:39:54

-Yes.

-It's been good fun, really good fun.

0:39:540:39:56

-It's been lovely having you on.

-Thanks very much. Cheers.

0:39:560:39:59

Brilliant, impressive low scoring. Come and play again, please.

0:39:590:40:01

Dave and Kevin, fantastic.

0:40:010:40:03

APPLAUSE

0:40:030:40:07

But, for Omid and Barry, it's now time for our Pointless final.

0:40:070:40:09

Congratulations, Omid and Barry, you have fought off

0:40:130:40:16

all the competition and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

0:40:160:40:20

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

0:40:260:40:28

for your charities. And at the end of today's show,

0:40:280:40:31

the jackpot is standing at £2,500. There it is.

0:40:310:40:33

APPLAUSE

0:40:330:40:36

Well, very well done - your first appearance on the show,

0:40:380:40:40

-straight through to the final.

-Yes, amazing.

0:40:400:40:42

-2-0 in the head-to-head.

-Yes.

-No arguing with that at all.

0:40:420:40:45

You know what happens in this last round,

0:40:450:40:47

four categories will appear on the board.

0:40:470:40:49

Is there anything you badly would like to appear up there?

0:40:490:40:52

-I like my sport.

-I'll be...

-I hope there's nothing with history.

0:40:520:40:55

-History is not my strong...

-I'll be a weak link on sport with you,

0:40:550:40:58

-I'm afraid.

-OK. What do you like?

0:40:580:41:00

Boring, I suppose.

0:41:000:41:02

Comedy and television.

0:41:020:41:04

-Yes, comedy.

-That would be nice.

0:41:040:41:05

-Politics.

-Yeah, that would be great, wouldn't it?

0:41:050:41:07

OK, well, let's see what's going to be on the board today.

0:41:070:41:11

What do you... The Letter N?

0:41:210:41:22

-I don't know.

-The Letter N might be interesting.

0:41:220:41:25

-Yes.

-Shall we do that? I wouldn't do Irish Pop.

-No.

0:41:250:41:28

-Child Actors...

-Child Actors...

-Run out of steam.

-Yeah.

0:41:280:41:31

-Sporting Achievements...

-Sporting Achievements...

0:41:310:41:33

-The Letter N?

-Let's go on Letter N.

0:41:330:41:36

-Letter N.

-Letter N.

-Letter N it is, Richard.

0:41:360:41:38

Yes, not a bad choice, I think, cos three very different categories

0:41:380:41:41

here, so hopefully one of these will suit you,

0:41:410:41:42

or maybe more than one of them will suit you.

0:41:420:41:44

We are looking for the name of any chemical element which contains

0:41:440:41:47

the letter N, as of June 2016.

0:41:470:41:51

We are looking for any Best Picture winner at the Oscars

0:41:510:41:54

that contains the letter N.

0:41:540:41:56

Or we are looking for any countries of the world

0:41:560:41:59

beginning or ending with the letter N. As always by country,

0:41:590:42:02

we mean a sovereign state that is a member of the UN in its own right.

0:42:020:42:05

So any chemical elements containing the letter N,

0:42:050:42:08

Best Picture winners at the Oscars containing the letter N,

0:42:080:42:10

or countries beginning or ending with the letter N.

0:42:100:42:12

-Very best of luck.

-Thank you very much indeed.

0:42:120:42:15

Now, as always, you've got up to one minute to come up with

0:42:150:42:17

three answers, and all you need to win that jackpot for your charities

0:42:170:42:20

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

0:42:200:42:22

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Yes.

0:42:220:42:23

Good, OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

0:42:230:42:26

There they are. Your time starts now.

0:42:260:42:28

-Countries, countries where...

-Yes.

0:42:280:42:31

..it finishes with the letter N.

0:42:310:42:33

-Beginning or ending.

-Countries beginning or ending? OK.

0:42:330:42:36

Yes. Right in now? Can I go right in with one?

0:42:360:42:39

I think we have to consult about which one we're going to choose.

0:42:390:42:42

-Nyasaland.

-Where is that?

-Nyasaland.

-Is that a country?

0:42:430:42:48

-Yes.

-Nyasaland? Where is it?

0:42:480:42:50

Well, it's just south of...

0:42:510:42:53

-Of?

-The other place.

0:42:530:42:55

LAUGHTER

0:42:550:42:56

-Nyasaland.

-Finland.

0:42:560:42:59

-Where? I've never heard of Nyasaland.

-It doesn't matter,

0:42:590:43:02

it's a country beginning or ending with the letter N.

0:43:020:43:05

OK, that's one question, all right.

0:43:050:43:06

What about Best Picture winners containing the letter N?

0:43:060:43:10

-Oh, just containing?

-Yeah.

-Not beginning.

0:43:100:43:13

Wow. Well, the last Best Picture was...

0:43:130:43:16

-We have to think of some quickly.

-Ten seconds left.

0:43:160:43:19

-Schindler's List.

-Schindler's List.

0:43:190:43:20

And chemical elements containing the letter N.

0:43:200:43:22

-Yes, but they're...

-Nitrogen.

0:43:220:43:25

OK, you've got the three questions.

0:43:270:43:29

OK, there we are. Your time is up.

0:43:290:43:31

If you could give your three answers and say which category

0:43:310:43:33

-you're answering in...

-You're saying the questions are Nyasaland...

0:43:330:43:36

-Yes.

-Nyasaland is one of your answers.

0:43:360:43:38

-OK.

-Schindler's List.

-Schindler's List.

0:43:380:43:41

Schindler's List might be good.

0:43:410:43:42

And then, we can think of another Best Picture winner...

0:43:420:43:45

How about Niagara? Didn't Niagara win something?

0:43:450:43:48

-OK.

-He did...

0:43:480:43:49

-Niagara. You're going to go for Niagara?

-Let's go for Niagara.

0:43:490:43:52

So, we have got...

0:43:520:43:53

Nyasaland, we have got Schindler's List and we've got Niagara.

0:43:530:43:56

Yes. Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

0:43:560:43:59

I would say Nyasaland, because I've never heard of it.

0:43:590:44:01

Nyasaland we'll put last. Least likely to be pointless?

0:44:010:44:04

-Niagara, possibly.

-Niagara, OK.

0:44:060:44:08

So, Niagara, Schindler's List, Nyasaland.

0:44:080:44:11

OK, well, let's put those answers up on the board in that order, then,

0:44:110:44:14

and here they are. We've got...

0:44:140:44:16

Well, very best of luck. If you were to win this jackpot,

0:44:200:44:22

you'd be sharing it between your charities.

0:44:220:44:25

What charities are you playing for? Omid?

0:44:250:44:26

Mine would be the Chain Of Hope charity,

0:44:260:44:28

which is for children with heart problems.

0:44:280:44:30

-Barry?

-St Luke's Hospice, Harrow.

0:44:300:44:32

Very good.

0:44:320:44:34

APPLAUSE

0:44:340:44:36

Two lovely charities there.

0:44:360:44:37

Let's hope one of these answers is pointless so we can split

0:44:370:44:40

that jackpot between them. Your first answer was Niagara.

0:44:400:44:43

In this case, we are looking for any Best Picture award at the Oscars

0:44:430:44:46

containing the letter N.

0:44:460:44:49

Let's find out if Niagara is right.

0:44:490:44:50

If it is pointless, it will win you £2,500 for your charities.

0:44:500:44:54

Let's see how many people said Niagara.

0:44:540:44:56

I'm afraid not Niagara.

0:45:010:45:03

So let's move quickly on to your next answer, which was Schindler's List.

0:45:030:45:06

Again, we were looking for Best Picture Oscar winners

0:45:060:45:09

containing the letter N.

0:45:090:45:11

Schindler's List, if it is pointless, will win you £2,500.

0:45:110:45:14

How many people said it?

0:45:140:45:16

It's right. Niagara, your first answer, was incorrect,

0:45:180:45:21

but Schindler's List is absolutely on the money.

0:45:210:45:23

Down it goes, through the 30s.

0:45:230:45:25

Into the 20s. We're still going down.

0:45:250:45:26

Through the teens. We are into single figures.

0:45:260:45:29

Down we go to 5.

0:45:290:45:30

GROANING AND APPLAUSE

0:45:300:45:33

-Close.

-5 for Schindler's List.

0:45:360:45:37

You're moving in the right direction, but everything

0:45:370:45:39

is now riding on your third and final answer, which was Nyasaland,

0:45:390:45:42

which you thought was probably your best shot at a pointless answer.

0:45:420:45:46

If this is pointless, it will win you £2,500 for your charities.

0:45:460:45:49

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Nyasaland.

0:45:490:45:52

-Oh!

-Oh!

0:45:560:45:57

APPLAUSE Sorry.

0:45:570:46:00

Your third answer, Nyasaland, was also incorrect, I'm afraid,

0:46:000:46:03

so you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer,

0:46:030:46:06

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £2,500.

0:46:060:46:09

However, as it is a celebrity special

0:46:090:46:12

and all of our celebrities are playing for nominated charities,

0:46:120:46:15

we are going to donate £500 to each celebrity pair,

0:46:150:46:17

to split between their charities.

0:46:170:46:18

So there we are. It's been wonderful having you on the show.

0:46:180:46:21

Thank you so much for playing and playing so well, Omid and Barry.

0:46:210:46:24

Remember, you get a Pointless trophy to take home as well.

0:46:240:46:26

-Fantastic, Omid and Barry.

-Thank you.

0:46:260:46:28

-APPLAUSE

-Close. Nyasaland...I believe...

0:46:280:46:34

Yeah, sorry about Nyasaland. Nyasaland is now Malawi.

0:46:340:46:38

Oh, yes, it changed.

0:46:380:46:40

It changed its name in 1964.

0:46:400:46:42

LAUGHTER

0:46:420:46:45

To be fair, it is only 52 years ago,

0:46:450:46:48

so it's... We're all getting used to it.

0:46:480:46:51

-I think that's the thing.

-No wonder my letters never arrive!

0:46:510:46:55

LAUGHTER

0:46:550:46:57

Let's take a look at the pointless answers in the different categories.

0:46:570:47:01

We'll start with chemical elements - lots of pointless answers here.

0:47:010:47:04

You could have had coppernicium, dubnium, you could have had indium,

0:47:070:47:10

tantalum, all sorts of pointless answers there. Scandium as well.

0:47:100:47:13

Now, Best Picture winners, it's so hard in 60 seconds,

0:47:130:47:16

cos there's going to be so many of these names that you know,

0:47:160:47:19

but the time runs out so quickly.

0:47:190:47:21

Lawrence Of Arabia, Midnight Cowboy...

0:47:210:47:23

You could have had A Beautiful Mind. Annie Hall was a pointless answer,

0:47:250:47:28

would have been a lovely one, Around The World In 80 Days,

0:47:280:47:31

From Here To Eternity, Gandhi was a pointless answer,

0:47:310:47:34

How Green Was My Valley, In The Heat Of The Night, No Country For Old Men,

0:47:340:47:37

On The Waterfront, Ordinary People, Shakespeare In Love - a pointless answer.

0:47:370:47:40

The Bridge On The River Kwai, The English Patient,

0:47:400:47:42

The French Connection, The Sting, Unforgiven.

0:47:420:47:44

Lots of pointless answers out there.

0:47:440:47:46

Well done if you got one of those at home.

0:47:460:47:48

Now, these countries beginning or ending with the letter N.

0:47:480:47:51

There is a lot of the "-stans".

0:47:510:47:53

There is also Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Tajikistan and Uzbekistan.

0:47:550:47:59

All of those were pointless answers.

0:47:590:48:01

Very well done if you got one of those at home.

0:48:010:48:03

You've been terrific entertainment all the way through, gents.

0:48:030:48:06

I'm sorry it wasn't quite the right final category for you.

0:48:060:48:09

Thanks very much, Richard, and thank you so much, Omid and Barry.

0:48:090:48:12

It's been lovely to have you here. Join us next time, when we will be

0:48:120:48:14

putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

0:48:140:48:17

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

0:48:170:48:19

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

0:48:190:48:21

APPLAUSE

0:48:210:48:24

A special celebrity comedy edition of the general knowledge quiz in which four teams try to come up with the answers that no-one else could think of. Presented by Alexander Armstrong and co-host Richard Osman. Featuring Andi Osho and Holly Walsh, Kevin Eldon and Dave Jones, Barry Cryer and Omid Djalili, and Stephen Frost and Helen Atkinson-Wood.