Halloween Pointless Celebrities

APPLAUSE

THUNDER

I tell you what, we're going to have to get that cappuccino machine fixed.

Thanks very much indeed. Hello. I am Alexander Armstrong

and a very warm welcome to this special Halloween edition

of Pointless Celebrities,

the show where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

Let meet today's Pointless celebrities.

APPLAUSE

And couple number one.

I'm Ruth Madoc.

I'm delighted to be back because I'm working with my friend

Russell Grant. I've known him since he was...18?

Only a few years ago.

I'm Russell Grant.

I sometimes look at the stars, but I dance a lot more

and this is my mate Ruth Madoc.

APPLAUSE

Couple number two.

I'm Trick. And I'm Treat.

And together we are... BOTH: Trick or treat!

Smell my feet, give me something good to eat!

Also known as John and Edward - Jedward. Yes. And we're twins.

APPLAUSE

Couple number three.

I'm Louie Spence

and nothing much has changed since the last time I was here.

I'm still a short, high-kicking homosexual with a speech impediment.

LAUGHTER

Oh, no. I've got a costume on this time.

HE HISSES

Hi. And I'm Linda Lusardi, actress, model and photographer.

Sorry, darling.

APPLAUSE

And finally, couple number four.

And I'm the real Linda Lusardi

and I am an actress, presenter and I do a bit of photography

and I've actually taken pictures of Chico in the past. Yes!

Hello. My name's Chico and, yeah, as in Chico Time.

I'm the founder of the charity Rainbow Child Foundation.

Happy to be here again. Love it.

APPLAUSE

Thanks very much, all of you.

We will find out more about you throughout the show.

So, that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

He's a winner of life's genetic lottery.

A huge intellect and a third nipple - what are the chances?

It's my Pointless friend. It's Richard.

APPLAUSE Hiya. How are you doing, everybody?

Good evening.

Well, well, where do we start? This is scary, isn't it? Yeah.

This is different. It is. I can't believe you didn't dress up.

I dressed up. Yeah, I did.

HE GROWLS

Horror. Actually, I've got to complete my costume.

Oh, yeah. LAUGHTER

Can I ask a question? Yes, please. Cos I can't remember.

Do you normally start the show coming out of a coffin?

Every time. For the last two series. I've never noticed it before.

What do you think about this? It's very slimming.

Is it? Oh, that's nice. Look at that. This is just the porch.

It goes way back. Oh, does it? LAUGHTER

We're going to knock all that through, I think.

How lovely. I'm pleased with it. Yeah, it's going to be quite eerie.

It's terrifying, isn't it? Absolutely terrifying.

Oh, Rich, thanks very much indeed.

Now, as usual, all of today's questions

have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants are looking for

those all-important pointless answers.

Those are answers that none of our 100 people gave.

John and Edward, if you talk all the way through,

you won't understand the rules.

We're not going to talk. We're going to focus.

We've been here before. We watch it all the time. I know!

It's like on an aeroplane - you may have flown many times before,

you still have to listen to the safety instructions.

Yeah, but on an aeroplane, you go on the aeroplane

and then you just get the flight.

OK, now... My comeback wasn't as great.

The exits might be in different positions is what I'm saying, John.

There's one there, for example.

Now, as today's show is a celebrity special

and each of our lovely celebrities is playing for a nominated charity,

we start off with a jackpot of ?2,500.

There we are.

APPLAUSE

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, now, all you have to do is remember this -

the pair with the highest score at the end of each round

will be eliminated.

Your job, if you like - John and Edward in particular -

is to make sure you are not that pair, OK? OK.

Don't be the high-scoring pair.

There is to be no conferring until we get to the head-to-head round.

No conferring. Are we clear on that?

OK, best of luck, all four pairs.

Our category for Round One this evening is...

Can you all decide who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

Do you want to go first?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

Famous duos. Richard.

Yeah, on each pass, we're going to give you

the names of seven famous duos.

We're going to give you their surnames.

We need you to give us the first names of those duos, please.

There are going to be seven on each pass,

14 in all to have a go at at home. So, very best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed.

Let's reveal our first seven famous duos and here they come.

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Russell, a very warm welcome back to Pointless.

It's lovely to have you with us again... Thank you, Alexander.

..on this terrifying night. It is. Ooh!

Now, Russell, you... It's a terrifying subject.

..you were the Astrologer Royal.

Yes, that was the name given to me by the media

after I presented an astrological chart to the queen mother.

And it was all done in public... Yeah.

..and the pictures shot round the world

and the next thing, there were headlines - Astrologer Royal.

You'll take that.

Yes, she's a wonderful woman. Excellent. Now, Russell.

Russell, which of our duos do you like the look of?

Oh, goodness me. I would love to go for Lerner and Loewe,

and I should, really, being in musicals, but I can't

cos I can't remember their names.

I'm going to go for Torvill and Dean

and I'm going to go for Jayne Torvill and Christopher Dean.

Jayne and Christopher. Let's see if Jayne and Christopher is right.

Let's see how many of our 100 said that. Jayne and Christopher.

It is right.

72. It's a lot. APPLAUSE

It is a lot, but it's a lot better than 100. 72.

Now, they won the BBC's Sports Personality of the Year

together in 1984. No-one's ever won it together before.

First time it's been given to more than one person.

But how could you split them? How could you?

Imagine if they had given it to Christopher Dean.

Jayne Torvill sitting there going, "Huh? You're serious?"

Thanks, Richard.

Now, then, Edward. Yes, last time you were here...

Last time, I lost it. ..you wore your hair down

and this time, it's gone back up again.

You found your rain hoods.

The thing about it is, you always change.

You wake up one morning and go...

It depends what hair products you have.

If you're out of products, you go, "Let's have it flat."

But it doesn't matter. We have it up today for Halloween.

Also, it's scary. It is scary. Hair-raising. It's not scary.

Miley Cyrus does her hair... Oh!

We were doing the fashion show with Jean Paul Gaultier

and he loves our hair.

And all the people in the fashion industry really think it's iconic.

And you think about it, most guys nowadays actually have this hair.

If you look at Richard,

he's got a wave or some sort of flow going on there.

Oh, you've reminded me - "Must get a haircut."

LAUGHTER

So, I have to guess their first names?

But I think I only know one.

I'm not sure. Probably the whole public know it anyway.

I'll go for Kylie Minogue

and...Jason Donovan?

Kylie Minogue and Jason Donovan.

Kylie Minogue and Jason Donovan!

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people

said Kylie Minogue and Jason Donovan.

You see, it's right. What, what, what!

64. 64. Look at that. APPLAUSE

Scoring less than Torvill and Dean. Wow.

Yeah, they met on Neighbours, of course,

which is 30 years old. Wow. I know. That's terrifying.

Guys, guess what. What?

We were in Australia clubbing with Dannii Minogue. No way!

Yeah. You are kidding me.

The thing about it is, Dannii Minogue,

like, she's so hip and cool,

she loves hanging out with younger guys

and she was in the club with me and Edward giving it loads.

She was dancing and it was good. Is that the end of that story?

Yeah. LAUGHTER

The thing about me is I get straight to the point.

No, the point is that when we were on X Factor, she voted us out

and now we're, like, breaking it down on the... In Australia.

Every time we go to Australia, she always wants to hang out

or, like, meet up with us.

Shout out to Dannii Minogue. Times have changed.

Rory, welcome back.

Listen, lovely to have you back. Great to be here.

Now, listen, Rory, last time, we were measuring you up

for the trophy winner's suit -

the traditional trophy winner's suit -

and you went out in Round One.

I know. Can you remember what the question was?

It was about the euro. My least favourite subject

and I think my partner let me down badly.

It was Nick Hancock. I wasn't going to mention his name.

Nick Hancock. Absolutely, yeah.

You noticed he hasn't been invited back.

LAUGHTER Rory... Yes.

..the first names of these characters here. Yes.

I think Simon and Garfunkel probably won't score that many,

so I'm going to go for a couple of old friends of mine,

Giedroyc and Perkins, which I believe are Mel and Sue.

Mel and Sue, says Rory. Let's see if Mel and Sue is right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Mel and Sue.

It's right.

39 - our best score so far, Rory.

Boy, that makes a change. Yeah, well played, Rory.

Very well known, of course, as Mel and Sue,

but the surnames are perhaps less well known.

Linda, welcome.

Linda and Chico are deep in conversation about the board.

I was just explaining the board

cos Chico thought that 39 was a worse score than 72. Ah!

Not in this game. Chico, you've even been on the show before.

I know I have.

Being Moroccan, we read from right to left,

so that's probably what...

Yeah, I got it wrong.

Yeah, that's 39. Not 93. Yeah. That's...

OK, now, Linda, welcome back.

Thank you very much for having me back.

Now, Linda, you started out as a model. Yes.

Now as a photographer extraordinaire.

But you're making skincare products now.

I am. They're taking the world by storm.

Cos I'm 97, really, you see.

Not at all. Every time Linda comes on, she has to dress up.

Last time, you were on our Christmas one. I was.

You dressed up as a pantomime costume. Now Halloween.

I was a wicked queen last time.

I don't look that much different today, do I, really?

I'm a bit wicked-looking. Certainly.

Now, Linda, this board is all yours.

Do you fancy talking us through all of it

and filling in all those blanks?

Well, I know Burton and Taylor

and I know Morecambe and Wise

and I know Simon and Garfunkel.

So, I'm trying to think which the public would know least.

Actually, Burton and Taylor didn't jump out at me

first of all, so I'm going to go with them.

So, it's Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor.

OK, Richard and Elizabeth, says Linda.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 said Richard and Elizabeth.

It's right.

Look at that. 55. Very well done. APPLAUSE

That's all right. It's in the middle. It's OK.

Very nice indeed. 55 for Richard and Elizabeth.

You chose the lowest score of the ones you knew, so, well done.

Simon and Garfunkel is Paul and Art.

Paul Simon, Art Garfunkel - 61. That's high.

Morecambe and Wise - of course, Eric Morecambe, Ernie Wise.

It would've scored 76.

The best answer, the musical duo, it is...

Do you know that one?

I've just literally been reading about them

cos they've just found their new songs, haven't they?

Yes. Alan Lerner and Frederick Loewe. There we go.

3 points for that. Very well done if you said that at home.

Thank you, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's look at the scores.

This is a nice, family scoreboard, I'd say.

Everyone's quite neatly bunched together.

The best score of the round was yours, Rory. Well done. 39.

Then up from there, we travel to Chico and Linda.

There you are on 55. Well done.

Then up to 64, where we find Jedward.

And then up to 72, where we find Russell and Ruth.

So, Ruth, you are not that far ahead,

but you are ahead, so we need a low score from you.

Let's have a low-scoring answer on the board.

Let's hope there's something you like the look of.

We come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, we're going to put seven more famous duos up on the board

and here they are. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

Chico, we are looking for the first names of each of these famous duos.

Now, Chico, welcome to Pointless again.

It's wonderful to be back. Lovely.

You were a finalist last time. I was, with the lovely Sinitta.

Now I'm here with the gorgeous Linda. There we are. Exactly.

I couldn't remember who was whispering to you last time.

That's right. It was Sinitta. LAUGHTER

Now, Chico, you've got kids. I do.

What's your sort of Halloween routine?

Do you have traditions? Yes, there is.

One of my best friends called Flora decks out her house

and it's become, like, the must-go-to night of the year.

So, we all dress up, Chris and Flora's Halloween party,

and that's what we do.

Wonderful. Wonderful. Now, there you are on 55.

If you can score 16 or less, you will avoid becoming the new high scorers.

You don't have to score 16 or less,

but a nice, low score should get you into the next round.

Hale and Pace.

I'm going to go for Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie.

Stephen and Hugh, says Chico. Here's your red line.

Were you to get below that red line,

you'd be straight through to the next round.

Let's see how far down the column you get with Stephen and Hugh.

It's right.

Oh, look at that! Is that all right? APPLAUSE

80. 80 takes your total

up to 135, Chico.

That's the biggest score so far, isn't it?

This is going to be a very tight round, I think.

There we are. Chico still hasn't got the hang of the rules.

I heard him saying, "Is that good?" LAUGHTER

To be honest with you, it was the only one I knew out of that,

so it was either that or nothing. There we are. Exactly.

There we are. Not bad at all. 135. You may still be in with a shout.

Louie, welcome back. Thank you. Love the peak.

It's quite nice, isn't it? Yeah! Very nice. Different.

Yeah, it's good. It's very good.

Now, Louie, when was the last time you were actually hoofing

eight shows a week on the West End stage?

It wasn't the West End stage.

I've just finished a tour with The Producers -

the Mel Brooks musical - with Jason Manford and Phill Jupitus.

So, I've just come off the stage hoofing. Fantastic.

Yeah, it was fantastic. Fantastic. I was Carmen Ghia.

Where did you tour with that? All over?

I did Birmingham, Manchester, Southend, Bristol

and various other places around there.

I know a few people who saw it. They said it was brilliant.

Yeah, I heard that as well. Well, it's a fantastic score,

so you can't really go wrong.

They had a fantastic cast. I don't mean me. Well, we do.

Thanks. But how nice for you because you obviously do pantomime.

Yeah, I love panto. Absolutely.

Is that the first big show you've done since the Pineapple days? Yeah.

Well, it's the first sort of show I've done -

stage show I've done - apart from pantomime.

So, yeah, it's the first stage show since...

My last one was Cats, so...

Really? Yes. Was it fun? Did you get back into the routine? Yeah, yeah.

Absolutely loved it. It was...

It's hard work, but absolutely loved it.

Well, listen, Louie, you are as good as through, I would like to say

because if you can score 95 or less... Right. ..through you go.

Obviously, you have to get something right from this board.

All right, I'm going to go with Lee and Herring

and it's going to be Stewart and Richard.

Oh, that's good. I am good. Oh, that's good. I know.

LAUGHTER Here's your red line.

Here is your red line. It's lovely and high.

Stewart and Richard.

Let's see how far down the column you get with that.

Down it goes, Louie.

You and Rory, I think,

will be scoring very low with this.

11. Very well done indeed.

A lovely round score of 50.

APPLAUSE

Very well played, Louie. It's a terrific answer.

Richard Herring has a chequered history on Pointless, doesn't he?

He does. He does. He's not had much luck. He hasn't.

But he tries and tries. I know. One day.

OK, now, Edward. Edward, listen.

Edward. Whatever. You just get over there, John.

John's kind of freaking out.

I don't think he knows any of these people.

I do. Of course I do. John.

John, you've performed to Barack Obama.

Yeah, it was a great moment.

I feel like he normally meets people in suits and stuff like that

and he met us in red sparkling outfits and spiky hair.

He sometimes wears that, doesn't he?

LAUGHTER But, yeah, it's great.

And we did, like, loads of other cool things,

but we're here right now on Pointless for a second time,

so this has been the highlight of everything.

Thank you for saying that. That's nice.

Yeah. Barack Obama said the same thing when he came on. Yeah.

LAUGHTER Did he?

Yeah, he came on with one of the Cheeky Girls.

LAUGHTER Now, if you can score 70 or less -

70 or less, John - you're through to the next round.

Come on. You can do this.

OK, Mitchell... Mitchell and Webb.

OK, I'm going to go for Al Mitchell and Richard Webb.

Al Mitchell and Richard Webb. OK.

There has to be a duo out there somewhere... Al and Richard.

..with those names in the UK. Here's your red line.

Get below that with Al and Richard

and you are through to the next round.

Let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many people said Al and Richard.

Oh, I'm sorry, John. I'm sorry.

That scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 164.

That little look Edward just gave John.

I wasn't ready to leave the show.

LAUGHTER

Yeah, not Al and Richard, I'm afraid. No.

Although it's got a ring to it. Mm. Mm!

Ruth... Yes.

..a very warm welcome back to Pointless. Thank you.

It's lovely to have you here. SHE LAUGHS

You know, one of the things we've decided on Pointless -

we just come across this again and again -

is if you ever did anything that was big in the '80s,

you have lasting fame forever and ever.

So, to be part of one of the great, classic sitcoms of the '80s,

everybody knows all about you, will always be interested.

Do you find that follows you around everywhere?

People still will say, "Hi-de-Hi!"?

Well, the most interesting thing to me was when they were repeated

and they started at 4:45 and finished at 5:15.

They were on BBC Two.

What was on BBC One? Pointless.

And when I looked at the ratings,

Hi-de-Hi! got about 5,000

and then Pointless - they all switched over.

Five million in the ratings. Fantastic.

I know. We got Hi-de-Higher ratings thanks to you.

LAUGHTER No, not at all.

So, anyway, let me see what I can do with this board.

If you can score 91 or less, Ruth - 91 or less - you are through. OK.

Talk us through that board if you like. Fill in all the blanks.

Well, it's Daryl Hall and John Oates,

Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan.

I don't know any of the others,

so I will go for Daryl Hall and John Oates.

Daryl and John, says Ruth.

Here's your red line. Lovely and high.

If you can get below that with Daryl and John,

you are through to the next round.

Let's see how many of our 100 said Daryl and John for Hall and Oates.

It's right and you are through. Very well done indeed.

That's a really good answer, Ruth.

23. There's your reward. APPLAUSE

95 is your total.

That's a terrific answer. Safely through to the next round.

Very well played.

Madeley and Finnigan - it is Richard and Judy.

It's a bigger score.

That would have scored you 68 points. Yeah.

Hale and Pace is... Gareth and Norman.

..Gareth Hale and Norman Pace.

17 points. Now, you do know McPartlin and Donnelly.

You know them much better by the names... Ant and Dec.

Ant and Dec, of course. Yeah. 63 for that.

And Mitchell and Webb. I love Mitchell and Webb.

They're good, aren't they? So funny.

They are David Mitchell and Robert Webb.

23 points for that.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. So, at the end of our first round,

the team, I am afraid, we are sending home -

I'm so sorry - with our high score of 164,

John and Edward.

Oh, Richard, I just want to thank you

for having us back on for a second time.

It's always a pleasure.

You must come back for a third. You've been on twice,

but you've only been on for two rounds.

Do you know our second names? LAUGHTER

Do you guys know our second names? Yes, Grimes, both of you.

Yes, Grimes. Grimes and Grimes. Yeah.

Listen, you can come back until you get through to the final,

which I think will keep us going... That could be years and years!

I feel like I'm stuck in a time warp.

I'll always be stuck in the first round.

Got to get past the second round. We'll have nightmares about this.

I'm going to go home and cry now. You'll have nightmares?

What about the poor kids watching? It's Halloween. Like, seriously.

But it's all cool. We beat the rush hour traffic.

There are a lot of houses to go trick or treating.

Yes, come on. John and Edward, thank you so much for playing.

Wonderful. Wonderful as ever. APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Well, this being Pointless, obviously we are now down to three pairs

and at the end of this round, we will have to lose another pair.

Massive hats off to you, Louie. Very well done.

Best score of that round with Stewart and Richard - Lee and Herring.

APPLAUSE Exactly. Exactly. Yes.

And well you might.

And, Ruth, very well done - Daryl Hall and John Oates. Superb.

But well done. Plaudits to be shared equally between you all.

Best of luck with this round. Our category for Round Two is...

Travel. Decide in your pairs who's going first, who's going second.

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Greek island destinations as they could.

Greek island destinations. Richard.

Yeah, we're looking for any of the major Greek islands,

the 26 most major Greek islands.

So, any island that belongs to Greece.

The way that we've measured them

is any island that has a national, international or municipal airport.

Just any of the biggest Greek islands, please.

There's 26 islands on the list. Very best of luck.

Well, this is nice. Nice sort of summery round for us. Yeah.

We can just think about Greek islands.

I need my Greek sister-in-law with me right now.

You've been to Greek islands, though, Russell. You can remember.

I filmed there, yeah. I have.

Can you remember a really obscure island you might have visited?

How many do you want? Just one.

Let me go for Kos. Kos. Yes. Kos. K-O-S.

Also did very well in our lettuce round.

It did, yeah. Did do very well. LAUGHTER

OK, Kos, says Russell.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Kos.

It's right.

42. Not bad. APPLAUSE

Not bad at all, Russell. Not bad. 42 for Kos.

Nice start, Russell.

Yeah, the third largest of the Dodecanese islands. OK.

Thank you very much indeed.

Rory. Hello. Rory.

What are you going to go for, Rory? A nice Greek island.

I might go for one of the Ionian Islands

which I think has an airport.

Well, I landed there in a plane,

so I'm hoping it had an airport. LAUGHTER

And that is the island of Zante, which is called Zakynthos as well.

Zakynthos.

Zakynthos, OK. Let's see if that's right.

If it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Zakynthos.

It is right.

Well, 42 is our only score so far

and you pass that very comfortably indeed.

19 for Zakynthos. APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed, Rory.

In fact, you landed at Zakynthos Airport. That's right.

There you go. LAUGHTER

Now, then, Linda.

Well, I've been to the Greek islands a lot,

but I am going to say Skiathos.

But I'm just hoping it's got an airport.

Skiathos? Sure it's got an airport. It should have. Skiathos.

If it hasn't, it should have one. Come on, Skiathos.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Skiathos.

It's right. Well, 42 is our high.

You pass it.

Zakynthos is our low.

You pass it. Yes! Yay!

APPLAUSE 5. Very well done indeed.

Yeah, served by Alexandros Papadiamantis Airport,

of course. Oh, Papadiamantis. Yeah, yeah.

Marvellous. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

Linda, the best score of that pass. Very well done. 5.

Then up to 19 where we find Rory and Louie.

Then up to 42, Russell and Ruth.

Ruth, we're going to need a low score from you. Yeah.

We're going to need a low score. Good luck with that. Get thinking.

OK, we'll come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, now, Chico. Remember, Chico,

we're looking for the name of any Greek island.

Any Greek island that happens to have its own airport.

I only know the main ones.

I'll go for Rhodes.

Rhodes, says Chico. Rhodes. Here's your red line.

If you can get below that with Rhodes,

you are through to the next round.

Let's see if Rhodes is right. Let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

Ah! Oh! 42. APPLAUSE

42 takes your total up to 47.

The largest of the Dodecanese - Rhodes.

I kind of miss Jedward. Do you?

LAUGHTER Yes. It's like the ghosts

of two Victorian chimney sweeps have left us.

LAUGHTER

Yeah, I'm missing them. I'm missing them. Louie.

I've got a few, but I'm not sure if they've got an airport.

I think you fly...

I think they've probably all got airports. All right. Haven't they?

I think they've probably all got airports. All right. Haven't they?

I can think of two gay ones.

One where the gay boys go and one what sounds like gay girls.

I'll try Mykonos.

Mykonos, says Louie. Mykonos.

OK, here's your red line.

Get below that with Mykonos and you are in the head-to-head.

How many people said Mykonos?

You've done it!

APPLAUSE Very comfortably indeed. 16.

Well done. 16.

Taking your total up to 35.

Another very good answer there.

Very good on that middle podium, aren't they? They are.

A Cycladian island, Mykonos.

Thank you, Rich. Now, Ruth, we can't say goodbye to you now.

We simply can't.

You're on 42. You have to score 4 or less. It's tough.

Well...

You've given me inspiration, Louie.

I'm going to say Lesbos.

LAUGHTER

How good does that sound in Ruth's voice? Oh, fabulous.

So, Ruth is going to say Lesbos. There is your red line.

If you can get below that with Lesbos,

you are through to the head-to-head.

Good luck.

It's right.

Oh, nearly! Nearly! APPLAUSE

Nearly, darling. 15 takes your total up to 57.

Yeah, one of the largest islands in the Aegean, Lesbos.

Let's go through some of the pointless answers,

see if you got any of these at home.

I won't be able to pronounce any of these.

All of these are pointless answers.

Sounds nice, doesn't it? Kastellorizo.

All of those are pointless answers.

Let's take a look at the top three answers,

the ones that most of our 100 people said.

Corfu. Crete.

We'll guess the top one in a second. So, Rhodes was 42.

Crete.

Crete - 54. And top one? Corfu. Corfu.

Corfu - 54, as well.

So, Corfu and Crete - joint highest.

Very nice. Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

So, at the end of our second round, the pair who are heading home

with our high score of 57, I'm afraid it's Ruth and Russell.

I'm so sorry. Very close, though.

Very close indeed. Lovely having you on the show.

Thank you so much for coming along and playing with us

on this most special night.

But we will look forward to seeing you again, I hope, soon.

In the meantime, thank you so much. Thank you. Ruth and Russell.

APPLAUSE Thank you. Thank you very much.

Oh!

But for Chico and Linda, Rory and Louie,

it's now time for our head-to-head.

Congratulations, Rory and Louie, Chico and Linda.

You are now one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot, which currently stands at ?2,500.

APPLAUSE

So, this is where we decide who goes through to the final

and plays for that money and we do that by making you go head-to-head.

The good news now, Chico,

is that you can confer before you give your answers...

Fabulous. ..which is nice.

You can pool your resources, if you like, can't you?

And the first player to win two questions

will be playing for that jackpot.

Well, we've had some moments of brilliance there. Louie. Louie!

Lee and Herring still. I know. That is a standout answer.

And Chico and Linda,

you blooming well got through it all, which is great.

By the skin of our teeth. You were about to say,

"You are very lucky."

No, you're not. You're brilliant. You did very well.

You scored less than everyone else. Skiathos, for heaven's sake.

Skiathos. Only cos I've been there. Oh, that was brilliant.

A jewel of an answer.

I just couldn't say it. Otherwise, I would have.

LAUGHTER Listen, best of luck to both pairs.

Let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question and it concerns...

It concerns ghosts. Richard. Just ghosts? Spooky, right?

We're going to show you five clues now to facts about ghosts.

Can you give us the most obscure answer?

OK, let's reveal our five clues and here they come. We've got...

I'm going to read all those again superfast.

APPLAUSE I thank you very much.

Now, then, Rory and Louie.

You've been our low scorers throughout,

so you get to go first.

WHISPERS: I think we'll start with the Shakespearean character.

Do you know that? Yeah. Well, if you know it, go for it.

I think I'm going to go for...

Banquo is the character who haunts Macbeth at the banquet.

OK, Banquo. Banquo, say Rory and Louie.

Now, then, Chico and Linda.

Talk us through the rest of the board as much as you can. Well, we know...

It doesn't matter now if we say it out loud, does it?

No, you can say it all out loud. We think we know the first one.

We know Ghostbusters, but I think

we're going to go for the first one, aren't we? First one, I think, yeah.

Poltergeist. Poltergeist.

So, we have Banquo and we have poltergeist.

Now, Rory and Louie went with Banquo. Did they go for the right one?

We will discover. Anyway, how many people said Banquo?

It's right. Not many people know Shakespeare.

I know a bit of Shakespeare.

I did it at school, but...

25.

APPLAUSE Everyone knows poltergeist.

25 for Banquo.

Is it enough? Should you have gone for poltergeist?

Let's find out. Now, Chico and Linda said poltergeist.

How many people said that?

It's right. I thought it wasn't right for a minute. It has to go...

Oh, look! 69. Wow. There you are. APPLAUSE

There's your answer. Well done.

Well done, Rory and Louie. After one question, you are up 1-0.

Banquo, actually the best answer on the board.

Couldn't beat it, so, well played.

The film, as I think you all knew, was Ghostbusters.

That would have scored 72.

The Dickens story is A Christmas Carol.

That's 62. And anyone know the actor who played...?

John Cleese. John Cleese.

Another good scorer, as well, actually.

Would have scored you 32 points.

Thanks very much. Richard. OK, here comes your second question.

Chico and Linda, you will get to answer this one first,

but you have to win it to stay in the game, so best of luck.

It concerns...

Famous cape wearers. Richard.

We're going to show you five pictures now

of people wearing capes.

Can you identify the most obscure of these, please?

OK, let's reveal our five cape wearers and here they come.

We've got...

There we go. Five famous cape wearers.

Chico and Linda will go first.

We're either going to go with C or E.

We just wonder which one they would have known least.

I would go for C.

I'd go for Oscar Wilde.

Oscar Wilde, then. OK.

You're saying Oscar Wilde for C.

Rory and Louie, talk us through the rest of the board if you like.

Chico and Linda have gone for Oscar Wilde.

Well, we were going to go for Oscar Wilde.

A is Elvis. Elvis.

B is Liberace. Liberace. D is...

Marlene Dietrich. ..Marlene Dietrich.

And E is Vic Reeves, by the looks of it.

I wouldn't have thought of Liberace as a cape wearer, as such.

I'd have thought of him as more with rings, Liberace.

Let's go for Liberace. Gay. Was he gay?

We're going to go for Liberace. What the hell!

You're going to go for Liberace.

OK, Liberace, say Rory and Louie.

So, Chico and Linda said Oscar Wilde for C.

Let's see if that's right and if it is,

how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

SPEAKS INAUDIBLY

APPLAUSE Ooh!

24 for Oscar Wilde.

Rory and Louie, meanwhile, have gone for B.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Liberace.

It's right.

It has to beat 24, though. Is it going to?

No. 41.

APPLAUSE Well done, Chico and Linda.

You're back in the game. After two questions, it's 1-1.

Yeah, I know you weren't thinking of going for Vic Reeves

on that first podium, but if you had,

you'd be in the final now cos he scored 23 points. No!

I think cos it doesn't really look

like him, does it? 23 points.

We thought it was Bob Mortimer.

You could've said something.

You could've shouted something out, Richard.

You also thought of going for Marlene Dietrich.

That would have seen you

through to the final as well

cos it's the best answer

on the board - 15 points.

15 for that.

And the other answer on the board, of course, is Elvis Presley.

Do you want to have a guess at what Elvis scored?

I would imagine in the 90s. 92.

98. 98. What about that?

What do you think that cape first...?

Cos obviously, when you see that cape now, we think Elvis cape,

but when he actually wore it for the first time,

that must have looked extraordinary.

I think he came out of make-up

and he forgot it was on. Yeah!

LAUGHTER Thanks very much, Richard.

It all comes down to your third and final question.

This is the decider.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final

and plays for that jackpot.

Best of luck to both pairs. It concerns...

We're going to give you five clues now to facts about Beyonce.

Simply the team that gives us the most obscure answer

is going through to play for our jackpot.

So, very best of luck, both teams.

OK, let's reveal our five clues and here they come.

I'll read those one last time.

There we are. Rory and Louie will go first.

Hang on.

THEY WHISPER

I mean, that's...

I think the second one...

The first two, I definitely know.

The last one, I don't know

so I would go with the first one maybe

rather than the second one cos I think the second one,

I mean, everyone knows that.

Well, this is really a solo round for Louie.

Sorry to dump the pressure on you.

Well, it's out of one and two and I think, don't you know

what that second one is by just the description of it?

I could guess it, but I couldn't guess the first one,

so go with that. I'll go for the first one cos I think

that might be more obscure than the other ones, so Dreamgirls.

Dreamgirls, say Rory and Louie.

Now, Chico and Linda,

talk us through as much of the board as you can.

Well, it comes down to one and two, really.

And we've got only two so I think we're going to go for...

Which one's going to be less? Number two, do you think?

Yeah, I think more people will know she was in Destiny's Child than...

Well, we know it's not going to be their answer.

It's the only one that we know. It's the American Super Bowl.

The Super Bowl. Yeah. OK, the Super Bowl.

So, we have Dreamgirls and we have the Super Bowl.

Rory and Louie went for Dreamgirls.

Let's see how many of our 100 said Dreamgirls.

It's right.

It's going to be quite high, though.

Not bad at all. Look at that.

19 for Dreamgirls. Good.

APPLAUSE Good work, Louie.

Chico and Linda have gone for the Super Bowl.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said the Super Bowl.

It's right.

Now, whoever wins this goes through to the final so this will decide...

31 for Super Bowl. APPLAUSE

Very well done, Rory and Louie.

After three questions, you're through to the final 2-1.

Let's take a look at the rest of these. You chose right there.

You also knew Destiny's Child, but it's a big scorer.

Would have scored you 49 points.

In 2014, she appeared in this video.

Also Condoleezza Rice appeared in it,

Jane Lynch, Jennifer Garner, all sorts of people,

to ban the word 'bossy'. Yes.

Oh, I would never have got that.

Quite right, too. 5 points for that.

And the title of her first solo album is a pointless answer.

Anyone who said Dangerously In Love -

terrific answer.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round -

I'm sorry to say - is Chico and Linda.

Very strong performance across the show, though.

Chico, nearly a second final for you.

Almost. Close, but not quite there. But we loved it. Absolutely.

It's been a lovely day. Thank you very much. Great fun.

It's been lovely having you on. Thank you so much, Chico and Linda.

Wonderful contestants. APPLAUSE

But for Rory and Louie, it's now time for our Pointless final.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Rory and Louie.

You've fought off - in fact, you've killed - all the opposition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at ?2,500.

Ooh! There we are. APPLAUSE

That could be going to your charities

if only you can get a pointless answer in this round.

Now, Rory, it was Round One last time.

You've upgraded. I'm trying a bit harder.

And last time, it was for Sport Relief

and I'm more a Halloween person than a sports person, so...

That's it. Now, Louie, head-to-head before. Yes, yeah.

Never a finalist.

No, never. Always a winner, but never a finalist.

Dreamgirls - that was the killer answer.

There we go. Well, it was brilliant.

It's a great performance right across the show.

Consistent low-scoring, so this is the right result.

Now, as always, you get to choose your category

from the four that we put up on the board behind me. OK.

Let's hope there's something up there you like the look of.

Today's choices are...

Well, I think fashion...

Horror film directors - no.

British box... I think it's got to be The Beatles.

Yeah. It's The Beatles. It's got to be the fab four.

Well, fingers crossed. Three questions here.

Hopefully, for a big Beatles fan, one of these will suit you.

We are looking for any tracks on the original release of...

Any of the tracks on the original release of those three albums

as according to The Beatles website. Very, very best of luck.

Now, as always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that jackpot

is for just for one of those answers to be pointless.

Are you ready?

Yes. Yes.

OK. Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

I think there's an obscure track on Rubber Soul... OK, well...

..called What Goes On.

I think there's one the same. What Goes On on Rubber Soul.

Revolver, there's all those jingly ones.

Oh, jingly.

# Turn off your mind, relax... # I would have gone for fashion.

THEY MUMBLE LYRICS What's that song called?

You chose The Beatles, darling, so...

He Said She Said... He Said She Said.

..is on Revolver. On Revolver.

Tracks on... Let's think of a track on Abbey Road.

Abbey Road. Now, that must be...

Love Me Do or something? No. No, of course not.

Let me think all the way through.

I can see them walking across the zebra crossing.

Oh! Darling is on Abbey Road. Oh! Darling on Abbey Road.

We've got one off each now, so even if...

Do you want another one just thrown in extra?

If you want to keep... We've got 23 seconds.

See if there are any more obscure ones.

Well, in that case, Her Majesty on Abbey Road. Her Majesty.

Everyone forgets Her Majesty.

Don't mind if you do, ma'am. LAUGHTER

I'm Only Sleeping on Revolver, of course, is...

Ten seconds left. Yeah, so...

# What goes on in your heart? # LOUIE MUMBLES LYRICS

That's it, yeah. Yeah, that one. Yeah.

LAUGHTER What's that one on...?

And Oh! Darling... Oh, darling! There we go. Your time is up.

Now, which three are you going to do?

You said the most obscure one on Rubber Soul, the first one...

What Goes On. What Goes On. What Goes On, Rubber Soul.

From...? From Rubber Soul. Rubber Soul.

He Said She Said. He Said She Said from...?

# He said, I know what it's... # LOUIE MUMBLES LYRICS

And Her Majesty from Abbey Road. From Abbey Road.

And Her Majesty. Thank you very much, ma'am.

OK, now, of those three, which do you think is the most...

Your best shot at a pointless answer? The most obscure?

I think What Goes On on Rubber Soul. I'd go with the Rubber Soul.

We'll put that one last.

The least likely to be pointless, do you think?

Probably... I think people might know Her Majesty from...

So, we'll put Her Majesty first, from Abbey Road.

OK. She's very popular.

Let's pop those answers up on the board and here they are.

We've got...

Very, very best of luck. Thank you.

Three great answers up there.

I would like to think all three of them are pointless.

I mean, it'd be nice, wouldn't it? That'd be fantastic.

Do we get three times the amount?

No, you get 30 times the amount, which is...

No, we don't! You're lying. No, you don't. I'm afraid you get...

But however, listen, will you just remind us what your charities are?

Because two wonderful charities you're playing for.

My charity is Crohn's Colitis. And Rory?

Mine is a charity called Get Connected,

which helps teenagers in crisis. Very good.

APPLAUSE

Two wonderful charities there.

Let's hope one of these answers here

will win that jackpot for those charities.

OK. So, we were looking for rare tracks on Beatles albums.

In the first case, we were looking for tracks on the Abbey Road album.

It has to be pointless, this, for you to win.

You said Her Majesty.

How many of our 100 people said Her Majesty?

For ?2,500, is it pointless?

It's right.

That was the first thing it had to be.

I reckon this might do it.

The second thing it has to be is pointless

and if it is, you'll leave here

with that jackpot for your charities.

Down it goes through single figures.

Still going down.

Oh! It stops at 1. Oh!

APPLAUSE

That's... That is just wrong.

That's a fabulous, fabulous score. However, it's not pointless.

You have two more shots at today's jackpot.

Your second answer was He Said She Said.

In this case, we were looking for tracks on Revolver.

Let's hope nobody's said it.

It has to be pointless for you to win.

So, for ?2,500, how many people said He Said She Said?

I don't know. I'm so nervous now.

I wasn't expecting to be nervous today at all.

I thought we'd have fun.

Ooh! Oh.

He Said She Said.

Whoa. There'll be a Stewards Enquiry, don't you worry.

Are you saying it's not on Revolver?

Well, we will discover. We will discover.

Which means you only have one more shot at today's jackpot. Oh, dear.

Everything is now riding on your third and final answer,

which is What Goes On.

In this case, we were looking for tracks on Rubber Soul.

Hmm.

OK. This was your most confident shot at...

Well, afterwards, he said he's not so confident once he'd said it.

LAUGHTER I'm going to hide behind this.

Now, to win the jackpot of ?2,500, it has to be pointless.

Let's find out how many of our 100 people said What Goes On.

Is it pointless?

It's right.

Well, your first answer was right and that took us down to 1.

Your second answer, He Said She Said,

was wrong, it turned out.

What Goes On takes us now into single figures.

Down it goes. Still going down.

You've done it!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Very well done indeed!

Absolutely fantastic. Brilliant.

Thank you. Brilliant. Brilliant.

Wahey! Congratulations.

What Goes On - that was a pointless answer,

which means you go home with that jackpot of ?2,500

for your charities. Brilliant.

APPLAUSE

What Goes On is the only Beatles track - or song - ever

with a Lennon, McCartney and Starkey credit in the writing.

Ringo Starr - Richard Starkey - wrote about five words

and got a credit for it. Very nice.

That's right. Also sings it, doesn't he?

He does. Of course, yeah.

It's She Said She Said is the track off Revolver, not He Said She Said.

Oh, I see! That's from my elocution lessons.

One letter out. But who cares? Who cares?

We've won. You won the money.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers on the different albums.

We will start with Rubber Soul.

You also could have had If I Needed Someone and Wait.

All of those were pointless answers.

Very well done if you got one of those at home.

Fewer pointless answers on Revolver.

Here, There And Everywhere is a pointless answer amazingly. What?!

I know. It's the most famous song...

I Want To Tell You and I'm Only Sleeping - also pointless.

You mentioned it in your 60 seconds.

I wouldn't have thought it was pointless, but it was.

And Abbey Road...

Oh! Darling - another song that you'd mentioned.

Three others - I Want You,

Mean Mr Mustard is a pointless answer,

and You Never Give Me Your Money also a pointless answer.

Very well done if you said any of those at home.

Terrific work in the studio. Lovely end to our Halloween special.

Brilliant performance from start to finish

and a brilliant end to it, as well. Thank you. Thanks very much.

Well, thanks, once again, to our winning players, Rory and Louie,

who go away with today's jackpot of ?2,500 for their charities.

Brilliant.

APPLAUSE Thank you. Thank you. Well done you.

Join us next time when we'll be putting

more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard. Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE