Episode 56 Pointless

APPLAUSE

CHEERING

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless.

This is the show where the questions have all been asked to 100 people before the show

and all our contestants have to do is come up with the answers

that no-one else could think of. Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hi. I'm Naomi, this is Rachel and we're twin sisters from Halifax.

-Couple number two.

-Hi. I'm Zoe. This is my mum, Joy.

We're both originally from Devon and now I live in Lincolnshire.

-Couple number three.

-Hello.

I'm Tom, this is my girlfriend, Ro, and we're from Birmingham.

-And couple number four.

-Hello. I'm Sue,

this is my husband, Colin, and we're from Haywards Heath in West Sussex.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks, all of you. We'll find out more about you throughout the show

as it goes along, so that just leaves one more person

for me to introduce. He's a man so clever

that his online banking security question

is on advanced particle physics.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

CHEERING Hiya. Hi, everybody. Hiya.

-Afternoon.

-Good afternoon to you.

-How are you?

-I'm very well.

-Got a couple of returning pairs today. Naomi and Rachel.

-Yeah.

-Did very well last time...

-Didn't they!

-..through to the head-to-head.

Ro and Tom, probably need to see a little bit more of you

this time, I think.

And we've got a couple from my hometown, or my old home town

-where I grew up, Haywards Heath.

-What about that!

-Sue and Colin, I think that's a first.

We've never had any Haywards Heath-ers on the show before.

Oh, I see. Actually from Haywards Heath.

-That is a terrific position to have attained, isn't it?

-It's amazing.

If you think about the teeming metropolis that is Haywards Heath,

-you'd think we'd have had hundreds of thousands of people from there.

-I think they're very restrained.

I think that's what it is. They're very modest people.

Did you fly up from Haywards Heath International Airport today?

LAUGHTER

There you go. Anyway, let's get on with this show.

Now, every question has been asked to 100 people before the show.

Today's contestants are looking for a pointless answer, that is one that none of our 100 people gave.

Find one of those and we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Now, Dave and Bill won the jackpot last time,

so today's jackpot starts off at £1,000. There it is.

Right. If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

Now, obviously, the pair with the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated.

And remember, there is no conferring in the first two rounds.

OK. Our first category today is...

Historic Figures.

Historic Figures. Can you all decide in your pairs

who's going to go first, who's going to go second.

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

..historical figures who never married.

Historical figures who never married. Richard.

On each pass, we're going to show you seven clues to historic figures who never married.

You just need to give us the most obscure answer, please.

There's going to be 14 clues, so 14 answers to get at home.

Very best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed.

So, we are looking for the names of these figures who never married

and here are the clues.

Our first seven reads like this.

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Now, Naomi and Rachel, you all drew lots before the show

and today you are going to go first for the second time.

-Naomi, welcome back.

-Thanks.

-Tell us what happened last time.

We did a lot better than we thought.

We got through to the head-to-heads, but then we totally fluffed it.

Even though Rachel does a PhD in film and I did a lot of my degree

on Latin America, we were really terrible at Hitchcock films...

-And Brazil.

-..and Brazil.

Yeah. It didn't go as well as it could have done.

But you did very well, you went through to the head-to-head.

OK. Now, you get first dibs on this board. What do you make of it?

I'm not going to lie, I don't...

Honestly, I know this is embarrassing,

but I don't know one of them.

The gravity one seems really obvious, but now I'm stood here,

I can't think of the name.

I'm going to go with the Wuthering Heights novel

and say Emily Bronte...

-Emily Bronte.

-..and hope that's right.

Emily Bronte. Let's hope it is, let's see if it is

and if it is, let's see how many people said Emily Bronte

for Wuthering Heights.

It's right.

-Yay!

-43.

APPLAUSE

43 for Emily Bronte.

Yes, published in 1847, that, under the pseudonym Ellis Bell.

But it doesn't help you get married if you have a male pseudonym.

I bet she totally would have got married if people had known she was a woman.

I bet there were loads of people going, "That's a brilliant book, but I'm not going to marry a guy."

-Don't you think?

-Well, yes.

If you went on a dating website and put your name as a male name,

people wouldn't be clicking on your link, whatever you'd written.

If she'd published it as Emily Bronte,

she'd have been beating them off.

I know. She would have been!

ALEXANDER LAUGHS

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Zoe, welcome to the show.

-Great to have you here. You are from Lincolnshire.

-Yes.

-And what do you do in Lincolnshire, Zoe?

-I'm a doctor.

-What sort of doctor?

-I'm training to be a GP, but at the moment, I'm working in a hospital...

-OK.

-..doing paediatrics.

-Doing your housemanship, is that what that is?

-I'm a senior house officer, actually.

-A senior house officer.

Soon to be a GP registrar which I think sounds a bit better.

-Will you stay up in Lincolnshire?

-Yeah, I think so.

Yeah, I've got a house up there.

-Now then, what about these famous people who never married?

-Yeah.

Erm... I definitely know two

and I think it's just trying to work out which one less people will know.

I'm going to say he supposedly discovered gravity when an apple

dropped on his head and say Isaac Newton.

Isaac Newton, says Zoe. Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It is right. 78!

APPLAUSE

78.

I'm afraid that didn't go down as far as the apple did. Richard.

That is a big score, isn't it?

He was an MP very briefly, Isaac Newton, as well.

But he only had one recorded contribution

to the whole of parliamentary history and it's noted down,

it's suggesting that someone close a window because there was a draft.

-That was his one recorded note.

-There we go. Isaac Newton. Brilliant.

-Now then, Tom. Welcome back.

-Thank you very much.

-Welcome back.

-Now, it was Round Two last time.

-It was, yep.

-What was the question?

-It was a food question.

-Ah, yes, I remember.

We were looking for coq au vin

and unfortunately, we were just one letter out.

-Coq du vin didn't cut it.

-No, wasn't going to do it.

No. So, unfortunately, you know, kumquat may, here we are again.

-Ah, that's good. That is good.

-Oh, my God.

-That is good.

Tom, how are you on this board of unmarried people?

Well, the two out of the three that I knew have gone,

so that leaves me firmly with one choice.

The Queen of England, famously known as the Virgin Queen,

-I'm going to go with Elizabeth I.

-Elizabeth I, says Tom.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said Elizabeth I.

It's right.

-39. Our best score so far, Tom.

-APPLAUSE

39.

-I would be a bit disappointed by...

-39 is...

-That's a very surprisingly low score, isn't it?

-Yeah.

For one of the most famous figures in British history.

This would be a really disappointing dating agency, wouldn't it?

If that was the first page of it.

-Who would you date out of all those descriptions?

-Um...

I'm going to be perfectly honest, it's between the authoress

of Wuthering Heights and the Queen of England.

I think I would... I think I would go on a date with the Queen of England.

I know but... I'm not sure. You're probably likely to get beheaded.

It would be bad if you had two dates and then thought, "Oh, I'm not sure."

Imagine though going to the Brontes'.

You'd have to go around there for lunch in the parsonage.

-You'd probably start eating too soon.

-Sir, you don't appear

to have texted my daughter in three days?

Thanks very much. Now then, Colin, welcome to the show.

Great to have you here. Where have you come from, Colin?

-We come from Haywards Heath.

-Of course!

LAUGHTER

I can't believe I had to ask you that. Haywards Heath, of course.

How is it in Haywards Heath?

It's as it always was, as Richard would remember it. Nice and quiet.

Lovely. So, Colin, you're the last person to have this board.

Do you want to talk us through it and fill in all the blanks?

German composer...

might be Beethoven.

I have no idea about a Polish composer.

A Scottish economist might be Adam Smith.

But I think I'll have an educated guess at the second one down,

empire builder, who I think might be...

-Cecil Rhodes.

-Cecil Rhodes, says Colin. Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many people said Cecil Rhodes.

It's absolutely right.

Oh! Stealth.

-APPLAUSE

-16.

Very nice indeed, Colin.

Best score of the pass. Very well done.

That's a very good answer from the heart of mid Sussex there.

Very well played. Now, you didn't do badly on the rest of them, actually.

You were right about the German composer. That was Beethoven.

He would have scored you 19 points. Rhodes actually a better answer.

You were right about Adam Smith as well, the Scottish economist.

That would have been a better answer. It's the best answer on the board.

Would have scored you 10 points. Very well done if you said that at home.

And the Polish composer, Xander?

-Chopin.

-Chopin. Frederic Chopin.

And he would have scored 14 points.

Thank you very much indeed. OK. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. 16, best score of that pass, Colin.

Very well done. That puts you and Sue in a very good position

at this stage. Then up to 39 where we find Tom and Ro.

Up to 43, Naomi and Rachel.

Then up to 78. Ooh, that was a costly answer.

I knew Elizabeth I as well.

I'm really annoyed that I didn't go for her.

Never mind. I think Joy looks like she knows exactly

what's going on in this round.

I think we're going to get a low score from Joy

and we're going to need a low score to keep you in the game. Good luck.

We're going to come back down the line now. Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK. Let's put seven more clues on the board and here they are.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

Now, remember, we are looking for the names of these famous figures

who never married. Sue, you're going to try and find the one you think

the fewest of our 100 people knew. How are you, Sue?

-Great to have you here.

-Thank you.

Now, you and Colin have known each other for a long time, haven't you?

We have, I'm afraid. Yes. We both met at senior school

and we've been married for 42 years.

Wow. Congratulations.

Has Colin changed at all over the years?

-I can't imagine him looking any younger, certainly.

-He was...

He was, erm...

not expelled,

but told to leave school

to have his hair cut.

LAUGHTER

I'm glad to see you've kept it nice and short for us today.

Thank you for that. Sue, you're on 16.

You're doing very well indeed. The high scorers on 78 are Joy and Zoe

which means 61 or less sees you comfortably through to the next round.

-And you get first dibs on the board so...

-Yes, yes.

What do you think?

Yeah. There's one I definitely know and one that I think I know.

But the one I definitely know is going to be really high, I think,

so I am going to go for the one I think I know

which is the Romantic poet who wrote Ode on a Grecian Urn

and I think that was Lord Byron.

Lord Byron, says Sue. Lord Byron. Let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Byron.

There's your red line.

Oh, bad luck, Sue.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer,

scores you the maximum of 100 points. Takes your total up to 116.

-Richard.

-Sorry, Sue. Not Lord Byron.

-I'll give you the right answer at the end of the pass. It's a much tougher board, isn't it?

-Isn't it?

-Thanks very much. Now, Ro.

-Hello.

Ro, welcome back. Remind us what you do, Ro?

I work in a school as an art technician.

-And in your spare time, what do you do?

-Sewing...

er, I love Robert Pattinson.

-Um, that's not really a hobby.

-Do you think you could mix those two?

OK. Robert...

-And him. I love Tom too.

-OK.

Sewing and Robert Pattinson. Interestingly, in that order.

Sometimes mix it up a bit.

Ah, well. Anyway, listen, there you are.

39 you are on which means

if you can score 76 or less,

you are through to the next round. What do you make of this board?

It's really difficult.

I think I'm going to be a bit safe and go for "Author who created

"the heroes Elizabeth Bennet and Mr Darcy", and say

Jane Austen.

Jane Austen, says Ro. OK. There's your red line.

Get below that, you're in round two. Let's see if Jane Austen's right. Let's see how many people said it.

It is right.

-And you're through. Well done.

-Yes!

38.

APPLAUSE

One better than Tom. Takes your total up to 77.

Well done, Ro.

-Another low score for Jane Austen.

-I know.

She actually was proposed to and accepted the proposal,

but she changed her mind the next morning.

Wow. It must have been quite a night.

The guy who proposed to her is called Harris Bigg-Wither.

ALEXANDER CLEARS HIS THROAT

And still she said no?

LAUGHTER

There you go. Anyway, now, Joy, welcome to the show.

-It's great to have you here.

-Thank you.

-And you are from Devon?

Yes, a small town, Ottery St Mary.

Famous for all sorts of things.

Famous for a very strange thing. Actually, we have got the birthplace of a famous poet,

-I won't mention his name.

-OK.

The other thing our little town is famous for is the world-famous

flaming tar barrels where people run about the town

carrying enormous tar barrels flaming on their shoulders,

running through crowds of 15,000 people.

-Until they die.

-Well, no-one has died yet.

Joy, you're on 78.

You were the high scorers at the beginning of this pass

but no longer.

Sue and Colin are on 116.

If you can score 37 or less, you're through to the next round.

I'm going to say Oscar Wilde for the Romantic poet who wrote

-Ode on a Grecian Urn.

-OK. You're going to say Oscar Wilde.

Here's your red line. Get below that and you're in the next round.

Oscar Wilde. Is that right?

Bad luck, Joy. I'm sorry.

Another incorrect answer scores 100 points, takes your total up to 178.

Sorry, Joy. Oscar Wilde wrote Ode to a Greek Guy called Urn but not...

LAUGHTER ..not that, I'm afraid.

Now then, Rachel. I have great news.

You are through to the next round, even if you score 100 points.

You are through,

-Tom, kumquat may. There you go.

-Feel free to use it whenever you want.

Listen, I'm going to. I'm going to.

I'm going to help myself to that one.

That board is all yours, Rachel, so talk us through it,

fill in all the blanks.

The top one, my cousin goes to a Steiner school,

so I think it could be Rudolf Steiner.

The Romantic poet, no idea.

Founder of modern nursing, I'd go for Florence Nightingale.

Don't know the other two.

I'd like to go for the bottom one, just for fun,

cos I know he's a French philosopher so...

Michel Foucault.

-You're going to say Foucault...

-Yeah.

-..for author of Candide? OK.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said it. No red line for you.

You're already through. But how many of our 100 people thought Foucault?

Oooh.

Tough board. Very tough board indeed.

An incorrect answer, as it turns out. Takes your total up to 143.

-But you're through. Couldn't matter less.

-It's all right.

-Richard.

Yes, not Foucault, I'm afraid. But you went for a risky one.

You were right about Florence Nightingale.

She is the founder of modern nursing there.

She would have scored you 63 points.

-Now, it's a tough board, Xander. How are you on this board?

-I'm OK.

-From the top, Maria Montessori.

-Maria Montessori, yeah.

Lots of Montessori schools up and down the country.

That would have scored you 17. Now, who wrote Ode on a Grecian Urn?

-That, I believe, is John Keats.

-It is John Keats, yeah.

-Good answer as well. Would have scored 8 points.

-8!

-The Renaissance artist.

-I would take a punt. Michelangelo.

-Oh! It's one of the other Mutant Ninja Turtles, I'm afraid.

-Is it?

-Yeah.

-It's Raphael.

-Raphael. I nearly went Donatella Versace, but I didn't.

Five points there. I think there's a clue in this one,

-the British Prime Minister.

-That one I know, Pitt the Younger.

-Yep.

That's a fairly good answer. 16 points for that.

And do you know the bottom one, the author of Candide?

I think it's Voltaire, but it might...

-It is Voltaire.

-Phew.

And that would have scored you 9 points.

So, Raphael is the best answer up there, but a very tough board.

-Well done if you got most of those.

-Thank you very much indeed.

So, at the end of our first round, I'm afraid the pair leaving us

with a high score of 178 is Joy and Zoe.

Dear, oh, dear.

-Never mind.

-Never mind.

-Oh, well.

-The good news is we get to see you again next time.

-Yep.

We'll look forward to that very much

and hear a little bit more about Ottery St Mary.

Looking forward to that in particular.

Thanks so much for playing, Joy and Zoe. Lovely contestants.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And so now three pairs remain. Sue and Colin, welcome to Round Two.

Good to have you here. Lovely low score from you with Cecil Rhodes there, Colin.

Ro and Tom, this was where you fell last time, Round Two.

Naomi and Rachel made it through to the head-to-head.

We'll be saying goodbye to one of you at the end of this round.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two is...

Football Managers.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name...

as many long-serving football managers as they could.

Long-serving football managers. Richard.

We're looking for the name of anyone who's managed the same

Premiership club for over 100 games, please.

So, any manager who's managed the same Premiership clubs

for over 100 games, from the beginning of the Premiership in 1992

all the way through to the start of the 2013-2014 season.

There's over 40 names on the list.

There's plenty of pointless ones, if you know your football.

But I suspect for some people it might be a damage-limitation round, this one.

Thanks very much indeed. OK.

-Naomi, football, is this good for you?

-OK. Not too bad.

I'm going to go for David Moyes.

David Moyes, says Naomi. David Moyes. Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

-APPLAUSE

-31.

Not bad. 31 for David Moyes.

Yes, David Moyes was manager of Everton for ten years.

-Pretty good going. He's a terrific manager.

-Thanks very much indeed.

Now, Tom. Are you feeling better about this than Ro seems to be?

Not much, no.

If I could pick the worst category that you could throw at me

-in a game of Pointless, this would have been right up there.

-OK.

-So, I'm going to go Kevin Keegan.

-Kevin Keegan.

How are you feeling about that, Ro?

Er...

If you'll forgive me, I'd say you're looking kumquat worried there.

OK. Let's see. Kevin Keegan, is that right?

If it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It is right.

31 is our only score so far

and you've beaten that. Down it goes.

Still going down. 13. Very well done indeed. Tom.

APPLAUSE

13 for Kevin Keegan.

Well done, Tom. That really is damage limitation. That's terrific.

Managed that feat with two clubs, actually. Man City and Newcastle.

Yeah, I knew that.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. Colin, we come to you.

This is a good round for you, isn't it, Colin?

-I've got one or two ideas which might be good answers, I hope.

-OK.

Which do you think is your best shot?

I'm going to go for a manager of Richard's team, Fulham.

-I'm going to try Chris Coleman.

-Chris Coleman, says Colin.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

13, our low score at this point.

Stormed past that.

Down to pointless. Look at that, Colin. Very, very well done indeed.

That is a proper pointless answer.

It adds £250 to today's jackpot, takes the total up to £1,250

and it scores you nothing. That's a fabulous answer.

-Proper Haywards Heath of an answer there.

-Yeah, really is.

-Richard.

Brilliant, Colin. Very well played.

Very unlike someone concerned with Fulham to score no points.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. That lovely last score from Colin,

the best of that pass. In fact, the best of the entire game.

Nothing is what they scored and nothing is where they are.

13 is what Tom and Ro are on. Then up to 31 where we find Naomi.

So, Rachel, we're going to need a nice low score

from you to make sure you get through to the head-to-head again.

Best of luck. We're going to come back down the line.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

So, Sue, we're looking for anyone who's managed

a team in the Premiership for more than 100 games in total.

-Didn't Colin do well?

-Didn't he?

-That was fabulous.

With an ex-Crystal Palace player as well and I'm thinking

about going with another ex-Crystal Palace player

and I think I'll go with Alan Pardew.

Alan Pardew says Sue.

She knows her football. It's good, isn't it?

There's your red line.

Get below that with Alan Pardew and you are in the head-to-head.

Let's see if it's right. Let's see how many people said Alan Pardew.

Oh, not again!

She doesn't know her football, does she, Richard?

LAUGHTER

-I'm sorry. That's an incorrect answer. It sounded so good.

-It did.

I thought that might have been a double pointless,

but I'm afraid you score 100 points and that takes your total up to 100.

It may not be the highest total of the round. Richard.

Yes, to be fair, Sue does know her football. It's a very good answer.

-I'm surprised it wasn't on the list.

-Ro.

Now, the high scorers are now Sue and Colin on 100.

You're on 13, so 86 or less

sees you through to the head-to-head.

Now, what are you thinking?

OK. I have absolutely no idea,

so I'm going to say Alex Ferguson.

I thought you might say that.

Oh, did you?

There's your red line.

Well, let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

You've done it!

72.

-APPLAUSE

-Wow.

That takes your total up to 85. You are in the head-to-head.

Very well done indeed. I thought that was going to be one of those occasions

-where it started and stayed on 100.

-Yeah. Over 800 games in charge

-for Sir Alex Ferguson.

-Rachel.

I've got a few in my head.

But I'm going to be safe because I just want to get it right.

Let me just remind you how safe you need to be.

68 or less keeps you in the game.

The high scorers are obviously on 100. You're on 31.

I'm going to go for Rafa Benitez.

Rafa Benitez, says Rachel. OK.

There's your red line. Get below that, you're in the head-to-head.

Let's see if Rafa Benitez is right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It is right.

There you are, through you go.

-HE LAUGHS

-Three for Rafa Benitez!

-APPLAUSE

-Wow, 34 is your total.

The lowest total of the round, very well done.

Very good answer, over 200 games in charge of Liverpool, Rafa Benitez.

Won the Champions League as well, of course, with them.

For people playing at home, I know some will be racking their brains,

trying to get some of these.

Quite a few pointless answers. Let's take a look at a few of them.

You could have had Alan Curbishley at Charlton. Alex McLeish at Birmingham.

Claudio Ranieri at Chelsea.

You could have had... Gareth Southgate would have been a pointless answer.

Gerard Houllier, again at Liverpool. Joe Kinnear, Wimbledon.

Mick McCarthy. Steve McClaren would have been a pointless answer.

Trevor Francis. You also could have had Brian Little at Villa.

Chris Coleman, we've already had, a great answer.

Gerry Francis at Spurs.

Jim Smith at Derby. John Gregory at Villa.

John Lyall at Ipswich. Or Roy Evans at Liverpool.

All of those were pointless answers.

Very well done if you survived that round,

very well done if you got a pointless answer, football fans.

Thanks very much, Richard.

At the end of our second round, the pair leaving us with their high,

but I'd say undeservedly high score of 100, is Sue and Colin.

But that was a great round,

and very well answered, although technically wrong.

LAUGHTER

Lovely to have you, we look forward to seeing you next time.

Sue and Colin, thanks for playing.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining pairs, time for the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Ro and Tom, Naomi and Rachel.

You're one step closer to the final,

and a chance to play for our jackpot which currently stands at £1,250.

To decide who gets to play for that money in the Pointless final,

you are now going to go head-to-head.

This time, you are allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

Let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Here comes your first question. And it concerns...

Celebrity fathers. Richard?

We have five pictures of celebrities,

all of whom have a famous dad. We need you to name the dad, please.

Very best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed.

So, let's reveal our five celebrities with famous dads.

And here they are, we have got...

There we are. Five celebrities with famous dads.

Ro and Tom, you've played best throughout the show,

and have the lowest overall score, so you get to go first.

THEY WHISPER

Erm, I was hoping for Angelina Jolie, but she's not there.

SHE LAUGHS

We're going to go for E, and I think his father is Jon Snow.

-E, Jon Snow.

-Oh, God.

Now, Naomi and Rachel, talk us through the board, if you can.

We don't really know any of them.

We think C's Nigel Lawson.

Nigella's dad.

I have a feeling E, I was going to guess

and say David Coulthard just because he's got a very similar jaw.

It is like, if you look under the nose, it looks like him.

But, everyone else, we don't have a clue.

So, we're going to go for C, Nigel Lawson,

just because I think it's right, and it's not just the jaw.

LAUGHTER

It is not just the jaw!

OK, you're going to say C, Nigel Lawson.

So, we have Ro and Tom saying E, Jon Snow.

Let's see if that's right, and how many of our 100 said E, Jon Snow?

Ooh! Bad luck.

Sorry, Ro and Tom. Incorrect.

Which means, Naomi and Rachel, you merely have to be correct,

with Nigel Lawson for C, to win that point.

Let's see, is it right?

It is right, very well done indeed.

-40, for Nigel Lawson.

-APPLAUSE

Well done, Naomi and Rachel.

You have broken their serve. After one question, it is 1-0 to you.

Well played, Naomi and Rachel.

E is Dan Snow, the TV historian,

but his dad is David Coulthard, I'm afraid.

LAUGHTER You can see the res...

The thing to do in this round, look at the jaw.

That's how I play it, just look at the jaw.

No, his dad is Peter Snow, who is Jon Snow's cousin.

-Oh, man!

-So, really unlucky.

13 points that would have scored you, well done if you'd said that at home.

-Now, A, Xander, do you know A?

-I do, Edward Fox.

That's Emilia Fox, her father is Edward Fox.

She would have scored you 17 points.

-B?

-Is Johnny Ball.

Zoe Ball, daughter of Johnny Ball.

Think of a number, that number is 53. HE GIGGLES

-You're right about Nigella Lawson.

-And D?

-That's Angelina Jolie.

-LAUGHTER

Uncanny.

That is the brilliant film director Duncan Jones, David Bowie's son.

Would have scored you three points.

Well done if you'd said that, the best answer up there.

Thank you very much indeed. Now, here comes your second question.

Ro and Tom, you have to win this question to stay in the game.

But Naomi and Rachel get to answer it first.

Our second question today concerns...

Damien Hirst. Richard?

We're going to give five clues, to facts about Damien Hirst,

very best of luck, both teams.

Let's reveal our five Damien Hirst facts.

Here they are. We have got:

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are, five clues to five facts about Damien Hirst.

Naomi and Rachel, you will go first.

THEY WHISPER

-Shall I just go for that?

-How sure are you?

I'm going to guess that the organic compound he used

to preserve his calf was formaldehyde.

Formaldehyde, you're going to say. Naomi and Rachel say formaldehyde.

Ro and Tom, talk us through the rest of the board?

-Fill in as many answers as you know.

-Oh, this is so embarrassing.

-You know all of them?

-No!

-SHE LAUGHS

No, I've got an art degree, but I'm not very good at this board.

Ro, you didn't have to tell us you had an art degree.

-You could have kept that quiet.

-Now the whole world knows!

Grade he got for his A-level in art? I'd guess something like a C.

Name of art movement is modern art

but I don't know if I'd have to say modernism.

Shall we have a guess at the decade?

How old do you think he is?

-What's a decade?

-'80s, '90s, '70s.

OK. I would say...

LAUGHTER

How did your art degree go?

LAUGHTER

Oh, gosh. Oh... Shall we say he got a C?

-Yeah, let's do that.

-OK.

Let's say he got a C.

You're going to say a C for his A-level.

Naomi and Rachel say formaldehyde is the compound

in which his calf was preserved. Let's see if it's right,

and how many of our 100 people said formaldehyde?

Absolutely right.

-APPLAUSE

-20.

20 for formaldehyde.

Meanwhile, Ro and Tom have said he got a C in his A-level art.

Let's see if that is right, and how many people said a C?

Oh, bad luck! Bad luck, Ro and Tom.

An incorrect answer. It means Naomi and Rachel,

after two questions, are through to the final, 2-0.

-Very well done indeed.

-Guys, shall we do the handshake?

APPLAUSE

He wouldn't have made all that money in art if he'd got a C.

-He got an E!

-Oh, man.

That would have scored you seven points.

Given you have lots of grades to choose from for A-level

and very few decades to choose from,

it might have been better to go for the top one.

-What decade would you have gone for?

-I'd say '60s.

-Born in the '60s?

-Yeah.

-You would have just scored yourself a point.

-Oh.

-Absolutely right, it would have scored 15.

-Oh, man.

Name of the art movement he is most associated with is the...?

-Brit art.

-Young British Artists.

That would have scored... Exactly, one point.

-The restaurant he opened in Notting Hill?

-Pharmacy.

Pharmacy is the answer. A tough board.

That would have scored you five points.

So, the Young British Artists is the best answer there.

-Thanks very much indeed.

-Pleasure.

The pair leaving at the end of the head-to-head, Ro and Tom.

-Ro, you didn't need to tell us you'd done an art degree.

-I know.

-Please don't tell anyone.

-It's fine, it's our little secret!

It's been wonderful having you on the show. You've done very well.

You've been the lowest scoring pair, you've done phenomenally well.

We're going to have to say goodbye. It's been a real pleasure,

Thanks so much, Ro and Tom.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

But, for Naomi and Rachel, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Naomi and Rachel, you fought off all the competition

-and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy. Well done.

-Yay.

You have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, that jackpot stands at £1,250.

-You've done incredibly well.

-I know.

-What a big surprise.

Despite Foucault in the first round.

I don't know anything about art but I know how to preserve a calf.

-I'm pleased about that.

-LAUGHTER

There you are, you did very well, formaldehyde preserved you.

LAUGHTER

As always, you need to choose a category in the final.

Your choices are as follows...

-What's wrong with Hull?

-LAUGHTER

I said, "Go for Hull." "Why won't you choose Hull?"

You have loads of different categories within Hull.

So it's not about Hull, it something from Hull.

-What do you know from Hull?

-What do you know about Russian culture?

LAUGHTER

-What would you go for?

-Dance Acts.

-Hull.

-That would be like Strictly.

-I don't watch Strictly.

-Hull, apparently.

-No, we can go Dance Acts, if you want.

-No. Hull.

-Hull, please.

-LAUGHTER

-Hull.

-They've gone with Hull, Richard.

-LAUGHTER

What else?!

The word Hull is starting to lose all meaning.

LAUGHTER

You have gone for Hull, very well done.

Let's look at the three options within that category.

We're looking for the name of any feature film made for cinema release

for which Hull actor Tom Courtenay received an acting credit.

We are looking for any top 40 UK single by The Beautiful South.

We're looking for any member of Hull City's 2013 promotion winning team.

-Very best of luck.

-Thanks.

As always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers.

And, to win that jackpot of £1,250,

all you need is to find one pointless answer.

Just one answer has to be pointless.

The answers you give can come from any of these three categories.

It could be one from each category, two from one, one from another,

-it's entirely up to you. Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Yep.

Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are, your time starts now.

Blackbird On The Wire?

We don't know any Tom Courtenay films. Do you know any?

-I don't know any, no.

-I'd have to go purely Beautiful South singles.

Blackbird On The Wire.

There's The Table. Perfect 10.

What's the other one on the album?

That's all I've got, actually.

Keep thinking.

-Perfect 10. The Table.

-Carry On... Oh, that was the album.

-Surely there's something called Carry On, then?

-Maybe. I don't know.

-There's some more obvious, there's Rotterdam.

-Oh, yes.

-Don't Marry Her.

-They're too obvious.

-Yeah.

I think The Table and Blackbird On The Wire were quite obscure-ish.

What's another one we could do with that? Perhaps with The Housemartins?

-No.

-Erm..

-10 seconds left.

-What have we said?

-Take The Table, Bird On The Wire.

-And Rotterdam.

-That's too obvious.

-Don't Marry Her.

-That's obvious.

-What's the other one?

-I don't remember.

OK, that's your time up. That is your time up.

I didn't want to stop you singing, because it was lovely.

What are your answers going to be?

All our answers are Beautiful South singles

because we don't know any from the other categories.

We are going to go for...

-The Table.

-The Table.

-Blackbird On The Wire.

-Blackbird On The Wire.

-And we're going to go for Perfect 10?

-Yeah.

-And Perfect 10.

-Yeah.

Of those three, which is your best shot?

-I think The Table.

-The Table.

-The Table we'll put last.

-Blackbird On The Wire in the middle.

-In the middle.

And Perfect 10 first.

Let's put the answers on the board in that order.

Here they are. We have got...

Very best of luck. Three fabulous sounding answers.

Impressive knowledge of The Beautiful South, I have to say.

They're the first band we ever saw.

Our parents took us to see them in Sheffield

when we were about 13, 14 years old.

-So there should be a pointless answer up there?

-We hope so.

If one of those answers is pointless,

and you win £1,250, what would you do with it?

Well, I'm going to Iceland next year, with 12 or 13 friends,

so it might buy us a round of drinks in Reykjavik.

It'd be spent on that, I think.

I want to save up for going travelling after my PhD, hopefully.

I'd put it towards that. Or buy her a drink in Reykjavik as well.

Very best of luck.

We're looking for top 40 singles by The Beautiful South.

Perfect 10, you thought was your least likely to be pointless.

-Yep.

-Let's find out.

Only one answer has to be pointless to win the jackpot. Let's see.

Perfect 10, is that a Beautiful South top 40 single,

and how many people said it?

Well, it's right.

Down it goes, through the 50s. Through the 40s.

This will give us some idea of how much our 100 people know

about The Beautiful South. 18.

-Not bad.

-We'll take it.

-APPLAUSE

Probably their best-known single.

Yeah, it is, actually.

But not a pointless answer.

We now leave their better-known singles,

and we head into unknown, some might say uncharted territory,

with Blackbird On The Wire, your second answer.

Let's see if it's right,

and how many of our 100 people knew it to be a Beautiful South single?

-It's right.

-Oh.

Perfect 10 took us all the way down to 18.

Blackbird On The Wire, meanwhile, taking us through the 20s,

through the teens, smashes past 18, down in single figures,

Down it goes, still going down...

Yes, you've done it!

-Very well done indeed. Brilliant.

-APPLAUSE

That's superb.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Very well done.

Congratulations, Blackbird On The Wire was a pointless answer,

which means you go home with that jackpot of £1,250.

Drinks all round in Reykjavik, I think.

APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed. What about that, Richard?

That's brilliant, isn't it? Very well done.

Lovely that The Beautiful South brought the jackpot in as well.

Terrific answer. Number 23 hit in 1997.

That is good pointless knowledge.

Let's take a look at some pointless answers from all the categories.

Tom Courtenay Films. Last Orders would have been a pointless answer.

Let Him Have It, the film about Derek Bentley.

One Day In The Life Of Ivan Denisovitch, also a pointless answer.

And one of the Philip Pullman novels, The Golden Compass,

that was a pointless answer. Well done if you said any of those.

Top 40 singles by The Beautiful South,

quite a few pointless answers.

You could also have had some beautiful songs,

I'll Sail This Ship Alone was a pointless answer.

Old Red Eyes Is Back, Prettiest Eyes,

those were all pointless answers, all worth checking out too.

Hull City's 2013 promotion winning team,

these all played on the last day of that season, or on the bench.

Abdoulaye Faye. Jack Hobbs.

Liam Rosenior, Leroy Rosenior's son. Paul McShane.

You could have also had Alex Bruce, Steve Bruce's son.

Jay Simpson, Matty Fryatt, also pointless answers.

Very well done if you said any of those at home.

Congratulations in the studio, terrific work.

Thanks very much indeed.

Thanks again to our winning players,

Naomi and Rachel go away with today's jackpot of £1,250.

APPLAUSE

Join us next time to put more obscure knowledge to the test.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me, goodbye.

APPLAUSE