Episode 21 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong

and Welcome to Pointless, the show where the aim of the game

is to find the most obscure answer possible.

Let's meet today's players. APPLAUSE

Couple number one.

Hi, My name's Kirsty and this is my colleague Karen.

We both work for central government and we both come from London.

-Couple number two.

-I'm Dave. This is my lovely wife, Sandra.

We're from Liverpool. I'm a capacity planner, Sandra's a housewife.

-Couple number three.

-Hi, I'm Brian. I'm a software engineer.

This is my sister-in-law, Pat.

She's a homemaker and we're both from Northern Ireland.

-And finally, couple number four.

-Hi, my name's Eamonn.

I work for the NHS and this is my girlfriend, Riona.

She's a freelance makeup artist.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks very much all of you.

We'll find out more about you throughout the show as it goes along.

So, that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

The factual froth atop our quizzical cappuccino,

it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hiya. Hi, everybody.

-APPLAUSE

-Afternoon. Oh, afternoon to you.

-And to you.

We've had some really, really good shows recently, some real crackers.

There are some familiar faces on today's as well,

who were on our last show. We've got Dave and Sandra coming back.

Lovely to see them. Didn't see too much of you last time.

It would be lovely to see a bit more of you.

On podium four, we've got Riona and Eamonn.

Knocked out by Ricky and Stuart

in a very, very tense second round, didn't they?

Just a last-minute 1 point answer by Ricky saw you knocked out.

And then our head-to-headers last time, Pat and Brian.

-Lovely to have you back as well.

-Thank you.

Seems a bit unfair that Kirsty and Karen are on podium one

-when everyone else has played before.

-I know.

-Now, last show...

-Yes.

-It's a lesson to anyone watching to revise. Revise, revise, revise.

Ricky and Stuart who are lovely fellows and very bright,

but on the way down, they'd revised two topics.

One was Turner Prize winners, one was Booker Prize winners

and the subject came up, Booker Prize winners.

-They took home £3,500 thanks to that.

-Brilliant.

-Hmm.

They did not have a clue what they were talking about,

but they had learned some names. If you asked them today,

they wouldn't be able to name you a Booker Prize winner,

but for that brief golden moment in the sun, they knew it.

-Very exciting indeed.

-Lucky.

-Yeah, lucky, is what I call it. Thanks.

Stuart and Ricky won the jackpot last time,

so today's jackpot starts off back at £1,000. There it is.

Let's see if we can build that up with some pointless answers

over the show. Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

APPLAUSE

All I'm going to say to you is that the pair with the highest score

at the end of each round will be eliminated.

That's all I'm going to say. That's it.

OK, our first category today is...

Oh, Karen, it's going to be fine.

It's going to be absolutely fine. History.

Can you all decide in your pairs

who's going first, who's going second.

Whoever's going first, step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

Bs in History. Richard.

-Bees In History would be a great topic, wouldn't it?

-Wouldn't it?

Famous Bees.

We're simply going to ask you seven questions on each pass,

seven historical questions. All the answers begin with B.

There's going to be 14 in all to have a go at home. Best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed.

Let's put our first board of clues up. Seven of them.

I'll read those once again.

Karen, a very warm welcome to Pointless. Great to have you here.

-What do you do?

-I'm a civil servant.

I work for Government Digital Service,

so we do online transactions, government online transactions.

I see. And what do you like doing

-when you're not doing online government transactions?

-Dancing.

-Love to dance.

-Love to dance.

-Bit of karaoke.

-Do you do formal dancing?

-No.

-Do you do dancing where you go and do classes?

-No, just normal dancing.

-Just normal dancing, but I'm great at it.

LAUGHTER

You didn't need to tell me that, Karen.

How great are you about these Bs from history?

-They're an eclectic mix, I'd say.

-Uh-huh.

OK, I'm going to go for the one that is probably the most obvious,

but it's the one that I know. I'm going to go for Brazil.

-Brazil for...?

-South American country,

first won the FIFA World Cup.

OK, Brazil, 1958. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Brazil.

It's right.

62.

62. Not bad. A lot better than 100

and you might have taken an answer that someone else knew off the board,

so tactically, very shrewd.

-Scary on that first podium as well.

-It always is.

That was the first World Cup of Pele as well, 17-year-old Pele.

Now then, Dave. Welcome back.

What happened last time, Dave? Talk us through that.

Well, we got US geography and I think the first answer was OK

and then the second answer was all right,

but two decent answers, we just got beaten by better answers.

Anyway, we'll put that behind us. Dave, tell us what you do.

-I'm a capacity planner.

-You all know what that is. He plans capacity.

But when you're not doing that, what excites you?

I'm a musician in my spare time.

I'm kind of between bands at the moment

but I've been in Beatles cover bands in the past.

Who were you in the Beatles cover band?

I was, because of the obvious physical similarity,

-I was Paul McCartney.

-Paul McCartney is exactly what I was about to say.

-You can tell.

-Obviously, yes. Did you come in on mic though?

-# Woo. # And things like that.

-I was woo-ing all over the place.

-Ah, I'd love to see that.

-I need money first.

-OK, fair enough.

Now, Dave, these Bs from history.

OK, I have a couple.

I am going to go for the name that links

the first Chancellor of Germany and the battleship as Bismarck.

Bismarck. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Bismarck.

Let's see if it's right.

It IS right.

Well, 62 you pass.

40. We have a new low score.

APPLAUSE

-40 for Bismarck.

-Well played, Dave.

Otto von Bismarck, of course, was the Chancellor.

The ship did not have a first name.

LAUGHTER

-Brian, welcome back.

-Thank you.

-Welcome back.

Great to have you here from County Armagh. But you work in County Down.

That's correct. Our office is located in Carlingford Lough.

It's a beautiful spot, so we can see the Cooley Mountains

and then the foothills of the Mourne Mountains on the other side.

-Lovely.

-It's a beautiful setting.

Brian, what do you do when you're not working?

I used to play a trombone

but I've given that up just being busy with work and stuff like that.

Used to play a bit of golf but, again,

that was knocked on the head for the pressures of work, so...

-But you have your own company, you see.

-Yeah.

-Are you good at NOT working?

-No.

-Or do you go home and you're still...?

You pick up the trombone and think, "Actually, no, I'm going to..."?

Because I'm a software engineer, it's a PC and I just lift it,

bring it home with me and then you can plug it straight back in at home

and continue working.

How many times do you go down in the middle of the night

-when you can't sleep?

-No, I don't do that. Very rarely.

Very rarely, very rarely. OK.

Now, Brian, what are you going to go for on this board of Bs?

There's a couple I would make an educated guess at

and there's a couple I'm fairly certain I know the answer to,

so I'll go with a banker and go for the bottom one,

the name of Disraeli and it's Benjamin.

-OK, Benjamin.

-Yeah.

-Let's see if Benjamin is right

and let's see any of our 100 people said Benjamin.

It's right. 62's our high score. No, it's not. 72...

APPLAUSE ..is now our high score.

Quite a high score, that one.

He was supposedly Queen Victoria's favourite prime minister.

Thank you, Richard. OK, now, Riona.

-You were put through the mill last time. That was tough.

-Yeah.

You thought you were through, you thought you were through

and then Ricky suddenly pulls a score of 1 out at the end of the round.

-Yeah.

-Now, Riona, remind us what you do.

I'm a makeup artist and I work in fashion.

Which means you never get to do comedy makeup

-where you have to put scars on people...

-No.

-..or black eyes.

-No, never, it's just making people look nice.

-Yeah.

What's the weirdest makeup you've had to do?

I've taped people's faces back with tape.

They do that to me before each show, actually.

LAUGHTER

Riona, this is all your board.

This is all yours, so why not try and walk us through it, if you can.

I mean, the first one, a chemical element,

maybe it was named after his surname, balaroxide.

-That's not my answer!

-LAUGHTER

The third one, I'm thinking Buddhism.

And then second from the bottom,

I'd guess maybe Budapest.

-I'm going to go with Buddhism for the third one.

-Buddhism.

OK, Buddhism, for Siddhartha Gautama.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said Buddhism.

It's right. Now, 72's our highest score. You've already passed that.

40's our low. You passed that.

35. Well done, Riona. A gutsy call. APPLAUSE

-Lowest score of the round so far.

-Well done, Riona.

Never have I seen anybody look as happy as Eamonn was

that someone said Buddhism instead of Budapest.

LAUGHTER

That's what THAT expression said. Not the Hanging Gardens of Budapest.

The Hanging Gardens of Babylon.

79 points for that.

The chemical element was bromine.

6 points for that. The painter?

-Botticelli.

-Botticelli.

And that scored 26 points.

Thank you. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores.

35, Riona, very well done indeed. Phew, pressure off, you can relax.

Job well done. We travel up from there to 40,

where we find Dave and Sandra.

Up to 62, Karen and Kirsty.

And then up to 72, Brian and Pat.

-Pat, we need a low score from you.

-I'll do my best.

We need a low score. That was quite punishingly high that, wasn't it?

We're going to come back down the line now.

Could the second players step up to the podium?

OK, let's put seven more clues up on the board and here they are.

I'll read those all one last time.

Eamonn, welcome back. Now then, Riona set you up very well there.

Nice, nice low score of 35.

Remind us what you do, Eamonn.

-I work as an office manager for the NHS.

-For the NHS.

-And before that, a croupier.

-Correct.

-How long did you do as a croupier?

It was about seven years in total, actually. The seven-year itch.

-Presumably why I...

-Yeah, you just had to move on.

Did you enjoy the croupier bit?

It was fun but the hours weren't particularly conducive

-to having a healthy and fulfilled life.

-No, that's true.

-Not cricket.

Your card skills must be second to none.

-Oh, yeah, make your eyes water.

-I bet it would.

-Just all the air coming from the flipping cards.

-Yeah.

I mean flipping cards, you know. LAUGHTER

Right, Eamonn, there you are. 35.

If you can score 36 or less, you are through to the next round.

OK, I think I know four of them, so I'm going to go for the country

that declared its independence from West Pakistan as Bangladesh.

Bangladesh, says Eamonn. Here's your red line.

If you can get below that with Bangladesh, you are into Round Two.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Bangladesh.

It's right.

56 for Bangladesh.

APPLAUSE 56 takes your total up to 91.

I think that will probably see you through.

Yeah, big score but we've seen all sorts of big scores in this round.

Lots of big scores out there. It's very low-lying, Bangladesh.

In 1998, when they had the flooding,

two-thirds of the country was under water.

Whoa.

-OK, now, Pat. Pat, good afternoon to you.

-Good afternoon.

Lovely to have you back. Lovely emerald-coloured top you're wearing.

-Yes, in keeping with the Irish.

-Indeed. Indeed, indeed.

Now, Pat, remind us what you do? You're a homemaker.

Yes, I'm mostly a homemaker

-but I do a wee bit of singing on the side as well.

-Exactly.

You also sing in a choir, is that right?

There are a group of five of us and we do charity concerts

in our local town and our local county.

-We do songs from the musicals.

-Do you sing in harmony?

-All the time.

-I'm an alto, yeah.

-So, a close-harmony group, that's fun.

Fabulous, yeah.

Very good indeed. OK, now, you are on 72,

-so 18 or less is what we require from you.

-Oh, gosh, right.

Well, I was going to say Bangladesh, but obviously, I can't now.

So, there are two others that I think I'm... Actually, three others.

But I think I'll go for the French national holiday

and go for Bastille Day.

Bastille, says Pat. Here's your red line.

Quite low. But if you can get below that, or near that, with Bastille,

you should be doing pretty well.

Let's see how many of our 100 said Bastille.

Ooh, 69.

Quite a high score there. APPLAUSE

141 is your total, but the round is not over yet, by any means.

Yes, commemorating the storming of the Parisian prison.

Thanks very much indeed.

Now then, Sandra, welcome back.

-Remind us what you do, Sandra.

-I stay at home. I'm a housewife.

-And you have children?

-Three girls.

-Three girls.

-Yeah.

-Loud, loud, loud.

-LAUGHTER

-They're going to see this, aren't they?

-What are they called?

-Abby, Charlotte and Jennifer.

-Excellent.

Abby, Charlotte and Jennifer.

And what do you do when you have time to yourself, Sandra?

I like to sew. I like to make dresses.

How many of the things you're wearing now

-are of your own manufacture?

-I didn't trust my...at all.

You can see it in the nightmares, can't you, just disintegrating?

I think that sounds wonderful, absolutely fantastic.

Now, Sandra, you are on 40. You are through to the next round,

come what may. Even if you scored 100 points,

you would be in Round Two, which is great news.

How are you finding our board of Bs? Like beard of bees but...

I know one for sure, but seeing as... I'll take a risk.

The first name of Yeltsin,

-I think it's Boris.

-Boris, says Sandra.

No red line for you, as you're already through.

-Were you going to say that, Kirsty?

-I'm so sorry.

-That's all right.

LAUGHTER

I can recognise the look of somebody who's just had their answer taken.

Boris, says Sandra. Let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

No red line, as you're already through.

79. APPLAUSE

79 takes your total up to 119.

In fact, saved Kirsty there cos that would have seen her knocked out.

-Boris Yeltsin, 79 points.

-Now, Kirsty, you've sat waiting

while all your answers have been taken, all those really good answers.

-Kirsty, what do you do?

-I also work for central government

and I'm a digital geek in the Ministry of Justice.

The Ministry of Justice. So, in Whitehall?

-No, no, no.

-No.

-Yes, I mean.

LAUGHTER

I understand. Not really allowed to say!

-Yeah, no, no, yes, sort of, yes.

-Yes, if you want.

-Yeah, if you like, it could be Whitehall.

-Maybe.

-You could just do it from home, couldn't you?

-I do. Or maybe not...

And what do you do when you're not doing that, Kirsty?

Well, I've got a bucket list that I'm currently working through, so...

-Does it get longer and longer, your list?

-No, I've restricted it to 100.

That's good. What's the most exciting thing you've done so far?

-I've dived with great white sharks. That was pretty...

-In South Africa?

-Yeah, South Africa.

-In a cage?

-Yeah.

I can't swim either which was quite interesting.

And sharks CAN, I don't know if you know that.

LAUGHTER

-Oh, dear. And anything pressing on your list?

-Pointless.

-Starring on Pointless as a contestant.

-That is good.

-This is on your bucket list?

-Yes, it was.

-That's wonderful.

I will say, though, "starring" was on the bucket list.

-Briefly.

-The jury's still out.

-LAUGHTER

-OK, that board's all yours, Kirsty.

-Oh, thanks.

-You have to score 78 or less. That's fine.

-Yeah.

78 or less and, as Richard said,

79 was what Boris scored, so that would have been a costly one.

So, I'm going to go for the only one I know there which is Bell.

Alexander... So, which one, I mean? LAUGHTER

-Sorry. Which...?

-The poet. No, the Scottish-born inventor.

The Scottish-born inventor. Alexander Graham Bell, you say.

Well, here's your red line. If you get below that,

you're through to the next round.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Bell.

It's right.

Ooh, 79!

79, which means...which means

you have a total of 141. Pat and Brian have a total of 141.

-We are in a state of lockdown.

-Lockdown.

-Lockdown!

-TOGETHER:

-# Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Lockdown! #

THEY BEAT RHYTHM

# Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, lockdown. #

THEY BEAT RHYTHM

-Where are the monks?

-Hold on. You've caught the monks unawares.

The monks are in Wetherspoons.

LAUGHTER

We are going to get them a taxi to try and race them round here,

but if not, we'll have to start without the monks.

OK, we'll start without the monks.

OK, as it is a tie and we are in a state of lockdown...

-# Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, lockdown. #

-Tch-go-go-tch.

-Oh, one day we'll have the monks, won't we?

-Mmm.

Now, OK, so, as it's a tie,

the tied pairs each have to give one more answer each

and the pair that has

the highest score will be leaving us.

You can confer before you give these answers, which is good.

So, Kirsty and Karen will go first.

I think we're going to have to guess.

So, why don't we guess the poet?

-Do you know any others?

-No.

-OK, good.

-Good.

So, let's guess

and make up Benjamin Britten, that famous Romantic poet.

Benjamin Britten. OK. I tell you what, he begins with B.

-Now, Pat and Brian.

-We'll go for the second one,

the 18th century arch in Berlin,

-as the Brandenburg Gate.

-The Brandenburg Gate.

OK, so we have Benjamin Britten and the Brandenburg Gate.

Let's see if Benjamin Britten's right.

No! I'm afraid, I'm sorry.

I'm afraid he's simply not. Scores you 100 points.

Takes your total up to 241.

So, Pat and Brian, you have to score 99 or less

with your answer,

the Brandenburg Gate. Let's see if that's right

and let's see how many of our 100 people said Brandenburg Gate.

-It's right.

-Oh, Brian, well done.

It's a good answer as well. 32, taking your total up to 173.

APPLAUSE

Well played, Pat and Brian.

The only answer that would have seen you through is that top one.

-The Edward Heath college. Do you know that one?

-Balliol.

Balliol, absolutely. 17. And the Romantic poet.

-It wasn't Benjamin Britten.

-Byron.

-Byron, yep.

And that would have scored 37 points.

Thank you very much indeed. So, at the end of our first round,

the pair who are heading home with their high score of 241,

I'm afraid it's Kirsty and Karen.

I'm sorry. We went through lockdown together, though, which is nice.

-Exactly.

-That's kind of starring.

We beat the 200 Club.

You beat them easily into a cocked hat, I'd say.

It's been lovely having you on. See you next time.

We look forward to that. Kirsty and Karen, great contestants.

Thanks so much. APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

APPLAUSE

And then, just like that...there were three pairs.

And at the end of this round, we'll have to lose another pair.

But Dave and Sandra, well done. This is what Round Two looks like.

Nice to have you here. Riona, well done, you.

Our lowest individual score of the whole round. Fantastic.

Well played on the far podium there. And, Pat and Brian, just well done.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two is...

Acting Pairs. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going first,

who's going second. Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

Film Co-stars, Richard.

In a moment, Xander's going to show you six pairs of film stars.

We're looking for the name of any feature film

made for cinema release up to April, 2015,

in which they starred together.

So, they both have to have a credit on IMDb.

Any film in which any of these people starred together, please.

Very best of luck.

So, we're going to put six pairs up on the board.

They're going to remain up for the whole round.

You don't need to say which pair's in which film.

You just need to give the name of a film

that one of these pairs has been in.

Let's reveal our six pairs. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are.

So, we're looking for any film that stars any of these pairs of actors.

OK, Sandra.

Right, I think I know one definitely,

but I don't want to take a risk,

so I'll go for, I think it's Hot Fuzz, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost.

Hot fuzz. OK, let's see if it's right

and let's see how many of our 100 people said Hot Fuzz.

Not bad, Sandra, well done. 27.

APPLAUSE 27 for Hot Fuzz.

2007 comedy thriller with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost.

Directed by the brilliant Edgar Wright.

Brilliant, indeed. Now, Brian.

Not really my strongest suit,

-but I'm going to go for Dallas Buyers Club.

-Dallas Buyers Club.

-Yeah.

-Dallas Buyers Club, says Brian. Let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 said it.

Ooh.

Ooh, bad luck, Brian. I'm afraid that's incorrect

and scores you 100 points.

Yeah, not starring any of those pairs up there, I'm afraid,

-Dallas Buyers Club.

-Thank you very much.

Now, Eamonn, Eamonn,

how are we feeling about this board of pairs, acting pairs?

Not great, but I can certainly have a stab in the dark.

So, I'm going to go for Shaun Of The Dead.

Shaun Of The Dead, says Eamonn. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 said Shaun Of The Dead.

It's right.

29. APPLAUSE

Not bad at all.

29 for Shaun Of The Dead.

Yes, a sort of precursor to Hot Fuzz.

Simon Pegg and Nick Frost again

and Edgar Wright directing again.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at the scores.

27, the best score of that pass, Sandra. Well done.

Sandra and Dave looking strong at this point.

Then up to 29, Eamonn and Riona

and then Brian and Pat, 100 points there.

I don't know what to say, except to suggest, perhaps,

-that on the next pass...

-I get zero.

-Let's have a pointless answer.

Maybe that'll see you through. We'll come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

Now then, Riona.

The Brad Pitt and Julia Roberts,

I'm thinking it's either a really modern film that I can't think of

or it's really old because I cannot picture them in a movie together.

And Jennifer Lawrence, Hunger Games is coming into my head.

-I'm going to go with Hunger Games.

-OK, The Hunger Games says Riona.

Let's see if that's right. Here's your red line.

If you can get below that with The Hunger Games, you are through,

but it has to be right. Let's see if it is. How many people said it?

Bad luck.

I'm afraid another incorrect answer. Scores you 100 points,

takes your total up to 129.

Yeah, Jennifer Lawrence in that,

-but no Bradley Cooper in The Hunger Games.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

-Now then, Pat. You have a target.

-Yeah.

-28 or less.

-Right. There are a few,

it's just trying to work out which is going to have the lowest score.

But I'm going to take a chance,

cos I think we need to, and say The Odd Couple.

The Odd Couple, says Pat. The Odd Couple. Here's your red line.

Get below that, you're in the head-to-head again.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said The Odd Couple.

It's right.

You've done it!

25! APPLAUSE

125 is your total.

Wonderful film from 1968 with Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon.

-That's a film worth watching, isn't it?

-Yeah! Thanks very much, Richard.

Now then, Dave, I have good news for you.

You are through to the head-to-head. Talk us through your thoughts.

The Odd Couple was my banker.

I was like, "Yeah, I'm going to say The Odd Couple, no problem,

"that's all I've got." But, whilst thinking about that,

another one popped into my head and that's Paul.

Paul, says Dave. No red line, as you're already through,

but let's see how many of our 100 people said Paul.

It's right.

16.

APPLAUSE Takes your total up to 43.

Lovely low total there, Dave and Sandra.

Simon Pegg and Nick Frost again in Paul. Well played.

Lots of pointless answers here. Let's take a look at a few of them.

Buddy Buddy - that's Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon.

Marvin's Room - that's De Niro and Streep.

Out To Sea - Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon as well.

The Adventures Of Tintin: The Secret Of The Unicorn

and The Boxtrolls - both Nick Frost and Simon Pegg.

The Front Page is Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon.

Othello - that's Michael Gambon and Maggie Smith.

The Grass Harp - that's Walter Matthau and Jack Lemmon

and The Last September - also Michael Gambon and Maggie Smith.

Thanks very much indeed. So, at the end of our second round,

I'm sorry to say the pair with a high score of 129

who are going to be leaving, it's Riona and Eamonn.

I'm so sorry to be saying goodbye to you.

You've been fantastic contestants.

I'm sorry we floored you with this one, but thank you for playing.

Riona and Eamonn, great contestants. APPLAUSE

For the remaining two pairs, it's time for our head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Dave and Sandra, Pat and Brian.

You're now one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot which currently stands at £1,000.

Well, you know the drill.

First pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

You can now confer before you give your answers.

Best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question and it concerns...

Starchy Fruit And Veg, Richard.

We're going to show you five pictures of starchy fruit and veg.

We've also given you the initial of the starchy fruit or veg.

Can you tell us what they are, please?

So, let's reveal our five starchy fruit and veg.

Here they come. We've got...

There we go. Five starchy fruits and veggies.

Well, I mean, Dave and Sandra, how things have changed.

Last show, you were out first round.

Here you are, our lowest-scoring pair. Absolutely fantastic.

Anyway, you've been our lowest-scoring pair,

so you will be going first. Feel free to confer.

INAUDIBLE WHISPERING

Right, we'd like to go for D, water chestnut.

Water chestnut, say Dave and Sandra. Water chestnut.

Now then, Pat and Brian. You were our golden pair last time.

What are you going to go for?

The obvious correct answer is E which is parsnip.

-C, it doesn't look like the shape...

-No.

-The shape of what?

-The coconut.

But the letters.

A and B, I don't know, Brian,

-so I think we'll play safe and say parsnip?

-Yeah.

-E, parsnip.

-Yeah.

OK, so we have water chestnut, we have parsnip.

Dave and Sandra said water chestnut for D.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said water chestnut.

It's right.

It's a good answer. 29 for water chestnut.

APPLAUSE

Meanwhile, Pat and Brian have said E is parsnip. E, parsnip.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right. Ooh. I barely had time to say it was right.

94. I think that's fairly conclusive. Dave and Sandra, well done.

After one question, you are up 1-0.

Let's go backwards. We'll start with C.

-Do you know that one?

-I don't know what that is.

It's where we get tapioca starch from. It's the cassava.

-Oh, thanks, cassava.

-That would have scored you 5 points.

-B?

-Plantain.

-Plantain. Very closely related to the banana.

That would have scored you 47 points.

And A is the best answer on the board. Do you know A at all?

-It's a squash, I think.

-It is a type of squash.

-It's an acorn squash.

-Oh, right.

-It would have scored you 2 points.

Well done to the two people in our 100 who got that and anyone at home.

Thanks. Here comes your second question.

Pat and Brian, you get to answer it first,

but you have to win it to stay in the game.

Best of luck. It concerns...

Countries Made From Chemical Symbols.

You need to know your chemical symbols for this one.

We're going to give you five lists of elements

and if you put their chemical symbols together,

they spell out the names of countries.

What fun. Let's reveal our chemical elements and here they come.

I'll read those again.

-Phew. Pat and Brian, you will go first.

-OK.

INAUDIBLE WHISPERING

-What do you think?

-Yeah, we're struggling a bit with these.

-No, I think we'll go for Copper Barium.

-Yeah, OK.

We'll go for Copper Barium and say Cuba.

OK, Cuba, say Pat and Brian. Cuba.

Now then, Dave and Sandra,

do you fancy talking us through the rest of them?

I think the top one is Argentina.

Then I think it's Poland, then Iceland

and then Singapore.

So, I would probably go for...Singapore.

-Are you happy?

-Yeah.

-Singapore.

-Go for Singapore at the bottom.

So we have Cuba, we have Singapore.

Now, Pat and Brian said Cuba. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said it.

It is right.

33.

APPLAUSE

Meanwhile, Dave and Sandra have gone for Singapore at the bottom there.

Let's see if that's right

and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Singapore.

It is right.

And if this goes below 33, which it does,

you are through to the next round. Well done. 13 for Singapore.

APPLAUSE Very well done.

Dave and Sandra, after only two questions, you are straight through.

-2-0.

-Terrific play. Took us through the board beautifully as well.

I can actually hear a nation of living rooms,

where one person's explaining what this question is to somebody else.

If you don't understand it, don't worry. It needn't detain you.

-But it's fun, isn't it? It's a fun question.

-It is great fun.

And you're absolutely right about all the other ones.

You got Ar-Ge-N-Ti-Na, Argentina, at the top there.

Singapore was actually the best answer.

You knew all of them and you chose the best one. Well played.

Thanks very much. So, the pair leaving us

at the end of the head-to-head round...

They've done so well, twice into the head-to-head round.

I mean, really, a very, very strong performance across both shows,

but I'm afraid this is where we have to say goodbye.

It's been lovely having you on the show. Thanks for playing.

APPLAUSE DROWNS SPEECH

For Dave and Sandra, it's now time for our Pointless final.

APPLAUSE

Well, congratulations, Dave and Sandra.

You fought off all the competition

and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

-Thank you so much.

-You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot,

there it is, stands at £1,000.

Well, I don't know what happened.

You've taken yourselves off after the last show

and given yourselves a stern talking-to

or maybe done some revision. Been incredible, the turnaround.

Yeah, lots of revision really, wasn't it?

-Lots of practice and harsh words.

-A splash of cold water on the face.

LAUGHTER Exactly, exactly.

Anything you'd particularly love to see in this last round

that'll help you take that jackpot home?

I'm a big fan of the Beatles, there's Terry Pratchett,

literature and stuff that I really like.

Anything like that I think I'd really enjoy.

OK, well, very best of luck.

Let's hope there's something on the board you like the look of.

As you know, you choose your category from four options we give.

Let's see what today's selection looks like.

-What's your strongest?

-Well, football's a big thing for me.

I just can't think what South Coast Football would be.

It would probably be players rather than clubs.

I might get caught out there, but I'm happy

to go for South Coast Football and just chance our arm on that.

-I'll help, yeah.

-OK, you're going to go for South Coast Football.

Very, very best of luck.

We are looking for managers in this question.

We're looking for any post-war manager of...

And for all of these, we will accept caretaker managers as well.

So, from 1945 through to February, 2015,

any manager of Brighton & Hove Albion, Plymouth Argyle

or Southampton. Very best of luck.

As always, you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers

and all you need to win that jackpot,

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Absolutely.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

Right, well, Brighton managers I know of

would be ex-Liverpool defender Sami Hyypia, recently.

He didn't last very long.

Jimmy Melia who won the FA Cup with them, I think.

I hope I'm right about that.

Plymouth Argyle, I can only really think of Paul Sturrock.

He's been there a couple of times. And I can probably come up with...

I know there's Lawrie McMenemy, Graeme Souness...

Um...Les Parry, I think his name was.

No, he might have been Tranmere. There's some...

I'm sure I can come up with another Southampton manager,

but definitely Jimmy Melia, Sami Hyypia...

And a Southampton manager I'll think of in a minute,

as soon as I get his name in my head.

-Have you got more than two?

-I can definitely come up with three.

-Ten seconds left.

-Definitely. Happy?

-Yeah, I'm confidant with you.

-OK.

OK, oh, look at that.

OK, I now need your three answers. What are you going to give me?

OK, so, Sami Hyypia and Jimmy Melia are Brighton & Hove Albion.

-Sami Hyypia and...

-Jimmy Melia.

..Jimmy Melia for Brighton & Hove Albion.

-Paul Sturrock for Plymouth Argyle.

-Paul Sturrock for Plymouth Argyle.

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer,

-do you think?

-Probably Sami Hyypia.

-Sami Hyypia goes last.

-Your least likely to be pointless?

-Jimmy Melia.

Jimmy Melia we put first.

OK, let's pop those up on the board in that order and here they are.

We have got...

There we are. Now, let's just imagine that one,

at least one of those, is pointless and you won £1,000,

what would you do with it? Dave?

It'll be going to, like, a European road trip.

The two youngest ones, in particular,

are constantly moaning at us that they've never left the country.

They want a European holiday,

so we think instead of flying them there, let's drive to Italy.

-I would love to.

-Let's make it difficult for them.

-Big car, drive, I would love that.

-Oh, that would be nice.

-Sandra, anything else you'd like to do?

-That's it.

I would just love to travel with the girls.

-That would be lovely.

-I think I can go too.

-Lovely.

-I'm not sure.

You're driving, Dave, what are you talking about?!

OK, your first answer was Jimmy Melia.

In this case, we were looking for post-war managers

of Brighton & Hove Albion.

This has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot of £1,000.

Let's find out how many people said Jimmy Melia.

It's right.

It's right. Now, all that has to happen is this has to go down to zero

and you will then leave here with £1,000 in your back pocket.

Down it goes into single figures. Still going down...

You've done it! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Very well done!

-Oh, my gosh!

-That's brilliant!

-Absolutely fantastic!

-Thank you.

-Superb!

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

ALEXANDER LAUGHS

Well, that was easy, wasn't it? Back of the net. Congratulations.

Jimmy Melia was a pointless answer,

which means you are leaving here with £1,000.

-You are travelling to Italy by car.

-Yay!

-Yes!

-There we go.

APPLAUSE

Very well played indeed. Paul Sturrock would have scored you 2.

-And Sami Hyypia would have scored you 3.

-Oh, my goodness!

So you put them exactly the wrong way round

which we don't like on this show.

You and I, Dave, we're the same age. It's hard to forget Jimmy Melia.

He was the Brighton manager when they got through to the Cup Final

with hair down here and running round the pitch. Terrific answer.

Let's look at the pointless answers.

People would have said all sorts of names at home.

Graeme Souness was a pointless answer, another one you mentioned,

for Southampton managers. Brighton managers.

Everybody for Brighton, apart from Gus Poyet, Brian Clough,

Chris Hughton, Sami Hyypia, Peter Taylor,

Mark McGhee and Oscar Garcia. Everybody else was pointless.

Well done if you got one of those. Let's look at Plymouth Argyle.

Everyone apart from Ian Holloway, John Sheridan, Peter Shilton,

Paul Sturrock and Tony Pulis. Everyone else was pointless.

And Southampton managers.

Some big names. Every Southampton manager,

apart from Ronald Koeman, Harry Redknapp, Lawrie McMenemy,

Mauricio Pochettino, Alan Ball, Dave Jones, Gordon Strachan,

Nigel Adkins, Alan Pardew and Glenn Hoddle.

They're the only ones who scored anything,

so any other answer was pointless. Well done if you got those at home

and congratulations in the studio. Terrific stuff.

You've been terrific. Absolute pleasure having you on both shows.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

-Thanks, Richard.

Thanks, again, to our winning players, Dave and Sandra,

who go away with today's jackpot of £1,000. Very well done.

APPLAUSE

Join us next time

when we'll be putting more obscure knowledge to the test on Pointless.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE