Episode 25 Pointless


Episode 25

Quiz in which contestants try to score as few points as possible by plumbing the depths of their general knowledge to come up with the answers no-one else can think of.


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Transcript


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APPLAUSE

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Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

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the show where we are always striving to find the most obscure answers.

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Let's meet today's players.

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APPLAUSE

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-Couple number one.

-Hello, I'm Mariam and this is my friend, Sarah,

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and we're both originally from Newcastle.

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-Couple number two.

-Hi, I'm Peter. this is my son, Tristan,

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-and we're from Tonbridge.

-Couple number three.

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Hi, I'm Tom, from Solihull.

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This is my friend Nina and she's from Cirencester.

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And finally, couple number four.

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Hi, I'm Charlotte, and this is my partner Stuart,

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and we live in Sydenham in South London.

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And these are today's contestants.

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APPLAUSE

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Thanks very much all of you. A warm welcome to the show.

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We will get to chat to each of you throughout the show as it goes along.

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That just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

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All about the grey matter -

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because he's going grey and it doesn't matter.

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It's my Pointless friend - it's Richard.

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-You're not going grey.

-Hiya, everybody.

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Good afternoon.

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APPLAUSE

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I kind of wish I was going grey a little bit.

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People accuse me of dyeing my hair and I never do.

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I get a little bit of grey at the sideburns.

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Oh, that's annoying. Yeah.

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But I think I'd be quite distinguished.

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I think people might finally take me seriously if I start going grey.

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The trouble is, everybody wants to go George Clooney grey, don't they? And nobody does.

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That's true.

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Anyway, we've only got one returning pair today - that's Tom and Nina.

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That was a great final round last time.

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Ian and Mark got a one-pointer, didn't they?

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Look how gutted everyone looks.

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That's a shame, isn't it? It's a shame,

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it's a shame the jackpot has gone up £1,000, isn't it? Aw!

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Sorry, everybody. So it should be a lot of fun today.

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Three new pairs. They all look like fun, don't they?

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-Don't they, though?

-Don't you think?

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-Don't they?

-It's going to be a rollercoaster.

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Is it? Is that what you've got planned?

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You know what it's going to be? It's going to be a log flume.

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That's better than a rollercoaster any day.

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I prefer log flumes. Every time.

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So put on a mac before you start watching.

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Wah!

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OK, Ian and Mark didn't win the jackpot last time so we add another

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£1,000 to that, so today's jackpot starts off at...

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£2,000. There we are.

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APPLAUSE

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Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

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APPLAUSE

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OK, this is the thing you have to remember.

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The pair with the highest score at the end of each round will be

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eliminated - that's the thing.

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Our first category today is...

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Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

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who's going to go second. And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

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OK, and our people question is all about...

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Famous scientists.

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Some vigorous nodding from the near end of the podium.

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Famous scientists. Richard?

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On each board we're going to show you seven clues to famous scientists.

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You just have to give us the most obscure answer you can, please.

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14 in all to have a go at at home.

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-Best of luck.

-Thank you very much.

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Let's reveal our first board of clues.

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And here they come. Seven on the first board.

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I'm going to read those all again.

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-Mariam.

-Hello.

-A very warm welcome to Pointless.

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-Great to have you here.

-Nice to be here.

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-What do you do, Mariam?

-So I'm currently an English literature

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and sociology student at the university in Leeds,

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but in my spare time I like to join in in the Labour society

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and do a lot of political campaigning and that.

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Would you say, of your time - there it is, big, big pie chart of your time -

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how much of that, honestly - and the people at Leeds won't be watching -

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how much of that time do you dedicate to your actual academic pursuits?

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I dedicate quite a lot of time, actually, to the society - too much time.

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Probably more than I should do.

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I spend more time actually doing that than maybe studying.

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Do you think your career will be going in that direction?

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No, not really. I mean,

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-it's fun to do in my spare time but I think politics for me will more be a hobby.

-OK.

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So at no stage in the future will people be watching you and saying,

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"Oh, my goodness, I can't believe the Minister of Education -

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"there she was on Pointless back in 2016!"

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Well, maybe in, like, ten, 20 years' time,

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but certainly not in the near future.

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OK. Mariam, scientists.

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I watched the Imitation Game and thought it was great but I can't

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for the life of me remember what the scientist is called,

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so I'm worried I'm just going to have to go for a really obvious one.

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I think I'm just going to have to go with the first one,

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which is Isaac Newton.

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Isaac Newton, says Mariam.

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OK, let's see how many of our 100 people went for Isaac Newton.

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It's right.

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63. It could have been higher.

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A lot better than 100, anyway.

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Gets us off to a good start.

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Isaac Newton, reassuringly,

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predicted the world would end no sooner than 2060.

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He said it may even end later, but said it's not going to end before 2060.

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-So that's good news.

-Phew.

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So we'll be nearly 90.

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-It's fine. It can end then.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

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Fine by me. Quite a nice way to go out, actually.

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Thank you very much, Richard. Now, Peter.

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-Hi.

-Peter, welcome to Pointless.

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Great to have you here from Tonbridge.

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-That's right.

-And what do you do, Peter? What keeps you busy in Tonbridge?

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I do voluntary work now.

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I volunteer at the local Citizens Advice Bureau and local charity bookshop.

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Quite satisfying, I should think?

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It is. There is a pleasure in doing it. You're helping people out, yeah.

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People are grateful, I imagine.

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-Oh, yeah.

-Pleased to get that.

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Yeah, I bet. Now, Peter, scientists. Yep.

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Right.

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I know most of them and there's two that I don't.

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The second one down I know, just not 100% sure on his Christian name.

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I'm going to play it safe and go for the Benedict Cumberbatch one and say Alan Turing.

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Alan Turing, says Peter.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Alan Turing.

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Not bad. 31.

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31.

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31. Well played, Peter. It wasn't until 1974 that they lifted all their security embargos

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about Bletchley Park. We knew nothing about it until then.

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Isn't that extraordinary?

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One of the most important places in British history and it was completely secret.

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Blimey. There we are. Thank you very much indeed.

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Now, Nina, welcome back.

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-Thank you.

-Remind us what you do, Nina?

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I'm a commissioning editor.

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You commission legal tomes?

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-I do.

-On what basis?

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Is it relevance or...?

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It depends if it's a new text or if it's an existing title.

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So if it's something new it will be because there is a requirement

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for it and if it's something that's already going, it's because there's

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-been changes in the law.

-Amendments to legislation.

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-Yeah.

-I see.

-And it needs to be brought up to date.

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And so basically, you're bidding for this because you know the minute

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it comes out lots of, everyone in the profession has to buy it, presumably?

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No, it doesn't quite work like that.

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-We have copyright of all our titles...

-Right.

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..and we commission prominent lawyers, academics, to write on them.

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So it's us organising the work,

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as opposed it coming out and then us bidding on it.

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-I see.

-We could write a legal book.

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We've written plenty of illegal ones, haven't we?

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Haven't we just? It should be illegal.

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-We could knock one out, couldn't we?

-Yeah.

-Law about something or other.

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Yeah. Tort is your thing, isn't it?

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Yes, tort law.

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And you are very good on corporate governance.

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Yeah, that's me.

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Yeah. Thank you very much, Richard.

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Now, Nina, what would you like to go for?

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OK. The one I was going to go for has been taken.

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I think I know two others on the board.

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And I think I'm going to go for the woman Nobel prize-winner,

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which I believe is Marie Curie.

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Marie Curie, says Nina.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Marie Curie.

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It's right. Well, 63 is our high score, which you've passed.

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31 is our low score.

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44 is where you settle.

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APPLAUSE

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Yeah, she won the Nobel Prize for physics and then for chemistry.

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I was terrible at both of them.

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Never did physics or chemistry.

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Physics. I mean, physics later on becomes really very exciting,

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but at school it's a bit...

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HE YAWNS

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If I ever dated Marie Curie, we would have so little in common, I don't think it would last.

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Really? Oh, but she must have been fascinating.

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You know, scientists at that level tend to be such polymaths, anyway.

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Listen, I wouldn't be bored with her, I'm saying she would be bored with me.

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I see. No, she wouldn't.

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Yeah, I think she would.

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Not with your tort knowledge.

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By the time I made her watch Pointless Celebrities for the fifth time,

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-she might be a bit kind of...

-HE YAWNS

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"Anyway..." And she'd be off to the lab.

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Thanks very much indeed.

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Stuart, welcome to Pointless.

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Good to have you here. Stuart, what do you do?

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I'm a brewer. I brew beer.

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You brew beer?

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How many different sorts of beer do you brew?

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We have kind of four core range and we make another four or five,

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depending on the seasons.

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-Yeah.

-Yeah, you'll have sort of visiting ones or short-term limited edition.

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-Summer beers, that kind of thing.

-Boutique brews.

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-What sort of quantities?

-We're a ten-barrel brewery.

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So when we brew, we do about 2,500 pints.

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-Ah!

-Yeah.

-Good stuff. Now, Stuart, you're the last person to have this board.

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Do you want to go through it and fill in all missing scientists?

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Some of them. I think it's Nikola Tesla.

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Charles Darwin.

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And Benjamin Franklin.

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And I'm stuck on Nicole Kidman's...

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So I think I'm going to go for Nikola Tesla.

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Nikola Tesla, says Stuart.

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Let's see how many of our 100 people went with Nikola Tesla.

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Absolutely right, Stuart.

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Very well done. 63 is our high score. You pass that very comfortably.

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31, our low score - you pass THAT very comfortably.

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Nikola Tesla, 15.

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Very well done.

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Very well played. That's the one, Peter, you were slightly worried about going for.

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-The Nikola, Nicholas thing.

-I couldn't remember if it was Nikola or

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-Nikolai or...

-Yeah, it's a very good answer.

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Well played. Let's fill in the rest of this board.

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We've already heard two of the answers.

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It's Charles Darwin.

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Everybody did well to avoid Darwin.

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It would have scored 68.

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And it is Ben Franklin, Benjamin Franklin.

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-Sounds like I know him, doesn't it? Ben Franklin.

-Yeah.

-22 for that.

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And this is the best answer on the board.

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Nicole Kidman played Rosalind Franklin.

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One point for that, so very well played, if you said that.

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Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

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So we're halfway through the round, so let's take a look at those scores.

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15, Stuart. Well done. Stuart and Charlotte looking very strong on the back of that.

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Then we travel up to 31, where we find Peter and Tristan.

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44, Nina and Tom.

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And then 63, Mariam and Sarah.

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So, Sarah, you're not masses ahead, but we need a low score to keep you in the game, so good luck with that.

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We're going to come back down the line now.

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Can the second players please step up to the podium?

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OK. Let's put seven more clues to scientists up on the board.

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Here they come.

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Let's read them again.

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-Charlotte, welcome to the show.

-Hi.

-Great to have you here. Charlotte.

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-What do you do?

-I work for a broadcasting company.

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Basically, we take the American shows,

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edit them for the UK TV and then sub them with European audios.

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-I see. Oh, that's fun. So you've got to get people in to redub things?

-Yeah, exactly.

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Hilarious. I've done that a few times.

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Yeah. Fun.

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Quite fun.

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So, listen, you're on 15.

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Great answering from Stuart in the first pass puts you quite comfortably

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at the head of the field. So 47 or less gets you through.

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That's good, because I knew most of the last board

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and I think maybe I know half of these ones.

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I think they're going to be higher-scoring, all the ones that I know.

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I'm not sure which one to go for.

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I will go with the Scottish bacteriologist.

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I hope his first name is Alexander Fleming.

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Alexander Fleming, says Charlotte.

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Here is your red line. You have to get below this red line with

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Alexander Fleming. Let's see if you can.

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49. I think that's good enough.

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49, taking your total up to 64.

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Very well played. One of our hundred genuinely said Aretha Franklin.

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LAUGHTER

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Well, she is Scottish.

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Thanks very much, Richard.

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-Tom.

-Hello.

-Welcome back.

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-Thank you.

-So, Tom, remind us what you do.

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I work for the Environment Agency.

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That's right, in the legal department.

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-Yes.

-And your interest, we discovered last time was...

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Running, long-distance running.

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Long-distance running.

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So do you do lots and lots of marathons?

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I've done a lot of half marathons.

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I mean, a half-marathon for me is a very long way.

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-Yes.

-I mean, I'm sure it's not when you're training for it but how do you approach that?

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It's all about establishing a steady pace.

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-Yeah.

-That's the most important thing.

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Feeling comfortable when you're running,

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not pushing yourself too much too early.

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Terrifying. Anyway, Tom, there you are.

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You're on 44. I mean, ideally, you'd be scoring 19 or less to remain with us.

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I don't think this is going to get us 19 or less,

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but I'm going to go for the inventor of the telephone,

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Alexander Graham Bell.

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Alexander Graham Bell.

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Well, your red line comes in there.

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Can you get below that with Alexander Graham Bell or close to it, at least?

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Let's find out how many people said Alexander Graham Bell.

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67.

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67 for that, taking your total up to 111.

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Well, you might have done enough to see yourself into the next round.

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Yeah, all sorts of controversy as to who really invented the telephone

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and its development. But he is credited with it.

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Thank you very much, Richard. So, Tristan.

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Welcome. Good to have you here.

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-What do you do, Tristan?

-I'm doing a master's currently

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in international development and emergencies.

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How long have you been doing that?

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It's almost finished, so about six months, seven months.

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And is there quite a lot of practical experience in that,

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getting involved in charities?

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Yeah, we do a consultancy project throughout the year which has just

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finished. I'm trying to get involved in charities afterwards, yeah?

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Right. So do you have anything lined up for post-master's?

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I want to go to Greece to do some work with refugees there.

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Very good. OK, so, Tristan, you're on 31.

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The high scorers at the moment are Tom and Nina on 111.

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79 is your target.

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Nice, easily achievable target, I think.

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OK.

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I'm going to go with the theoretical physicist who wrote A Brief History Of Time.

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Go with Stephen Hawking.

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Stephen Hawking, says Tristan.

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Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said Stephen Hawking.

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There's your red line, nice and high.

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It's right, and you're through.

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44.

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That takes your total up to 75.

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It's been bought by over 10 million people worldwide, that book.

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It's been read by over 10 people worldwide.

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Thank you, Richard. Sarah, welcome to Pointless.

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Good to have you here. Now, Sarah, tell us what you do.

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I'm a history student.

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History student. Whereabouts?

0:17:140:17:16

York, I go to York St John's.

0:17:160:17:18

York. In which year?

0:17:180:17:20

-First year.

-All going well?

0:17:200:17:21

-Yeah, so far so good.

-Have you enjoyed your course?

0:17:210:17:23

You won't be changing to a different faculty at any stage?

0:17:230:17:26

-No.

-You're going to see history through. I mean, it's a great place to be, York.

0:17:260:17:30

-Oh, yeah.

-Did you know York well before?

0:17:300:17:32

Yeah, I've been there on holiday before -

0:17:320:17:34

cos I live in Newcastle, it's quite close so I've been there

0:17:340:17:37

for days. It's full of history, so it's great.

0:17:370:17:40

Beautiful place. Now, 63 is your score.

0:17:400:17:42

You have to score 47 or less.

0:17:420:17:44

Well, I'm trying to think back to my GCSE science and it's just not there.

0:17:440:17:49

I think I've got rid of all that out of my head now,

0:17:490:17:52

so I'm going to have a punt on the British ethologist.

0:17:520:17:57

I don't know why - Jane Graham is ringing some sort all of bell.

0:17:570:18:00

Jane Graham, ethologist.

0:18:000:18:02

Let's see if Jane Graham is right.

0:18:020:18:06

There is your Red Line. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Jane Graham.

0:18:060:18:08

Is this a brilliant answer, or have you just made it up?

0:18:080:18:12

We'll find out.

0:18:120:18:13

Oh, no!

0:18:160:18:17

Oh, bad luck.

0:18:190:18:20

I'm afraid not Jane Graham.

0:18:200:18:21

An incorrect answer scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 163.

0:18:210:18:25

But I applaud the spirit of your answer.

0:18:250:18:27

Sorry, Sarah. The answer must be up there somewhere, it's Jane Goodall.

0:18:270:18:30

-Oh.

-Is the answer.

0:18:300:18:32

First person ever to observe chimpanzees using tools, Jane Goodall,

0:18:320:18:36

or certainly the first person to notify us of seeing it.

0:18:360:18:39

She would have scored you seven points if you had said that.

0:18:390:18:42

The inventor who set up the research lab,

0:18:420:18:44

one of the most famous inventors of all time.

0:18:440:18:45

-Edison.

-Thomas Edison, yeah. But only scored nine points.

0:18:450:18:49

Amazing. Discovered the nucleus of an atom.

0:18:490:18:52

One of the elements is named after him. One of my favourites.

0:18:520:18:54

Oh, it's our friend Rutherford.

0:18:540:18:55

-It is - Ernest Rutherford.

-Ernest Rutherford.

0:18:550:18:58

14 for that.

0:18:580:18:59

-And the Nobel prize-winning physicist...

-Albert Einstein.

-..Albert Einstein,

0:18:590:19:03

would have scored 65. So Jane Goodall, the best answer on the board.

0:19:030:19:06

Thank you very much indeed.

0:19:060:19:07

Well, at the end of our first round, we have to say goodbye to one of our

0:19:070:19:10

pairs and I'm afraid it's our first pair here, Sarah and Mariam.

0:19:100:19:12

We have to say goodbye. You were so nearly there.

0:19:120:19:14

Jane G... Jane Goodall.

0:19:140:19:17

Anyway, it was a brave shot. We'll see you again next time and I'm sure

0:19:170:19:20

you'll get much, much further. But in the meantime,

0:19:200:19:22

thanks very much for playing, Sarah and Mariam.

0:19:220:19:24

APPLAUSE

0:19:240:19:28

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

0:19:280:19:30

So, three pairs remain. At the end of this round,

0:19:360:19:38

we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

0:19:380:19:40

Well done. We made it through scientists.

0:19:400:19:42

That was quite tough but, Stuart, very well done.

0:19:420:19:45

Nikola Tesla the best answer of that round.

0:19:450:19:47

Best of luck to all three pairs for our next round,

0:19:470:19:49

the category for which is...

0:19:490:19:51

Charity fundraising, Tristan.

0:19:540:19:55

Can you all decide in your pairs - who's going to go first,

0:19:550:19:58

who's going to go second.

0:19:580:19:59

And whoever is going first, please, step up to the podium.

0:19:590:20:02

And the question concerns...

0:20:050:20:08

All-star choirs, Richard.

0:20:120:20:13

Yeah, we're going to show you a picture now of the all-star choir

0:20:130:20:16

who performed the 2014 Children In Need single.

0:20:160:20:19

You just need to name anybody you're about to see on this image, please.

0:20:190:20:22

We won't accept Pudsey Bear, I'm afraid.

0:20:220:20:24

Thanks very much. So we are going to show you an image,

0:20:240:20:27

that's going to stay up for the whole round.

0:20:270:20:28

Here is that image.

0:20:280:20:30

There we go.

0:20:360:20:37

That is the all-star choir.

0:20:370:20:39

We just need the name of anyone pictured there.

0:20:390:20:45

Tristan.

0:20:450:20:46

I can only really pick out one or two.

0:20:480:20:50

So I'm going to go with Jo Brand.

0:20:520:20:54

Jo Brand. Jo Brand, says Tristan.

0:20:540:20:56

Let's see if that's right.

0:20:560:20:58

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Jo Brand.

0:20:580:21:00

74. 74.

0:21:040:21:06

There she is on the bottom row, Jo Brand.

0:21:110:21:12

They made a series of them recording this.

0:21:120:21:15

She was very funny because she didn't want to be told what to do.

0:21:150:21:18

-No.

-She didn't realise that it's actually quite hard work and she was so naughty.

0:21:180:21:22

She thought everyone was going to be naughty as well.

0:21:220:21:24

-Yeah.

-And she was kind of the only one.

-Very funny.

-Excellent.

0:21:240:21:28

Nina.

0:21:280:21:29

I'm going to go for...Larry Lamb.

0:21:300:21:34

Larry Lamb, says Nina.

0:21:340:21:35

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Larry Lamb.

0:21:350:21:38

It's right. You've passed 74 quite comfortably there.

0:21:410:21:45

Down it goes. Larry Lamb - to 28.

0:21:450:21:46

That's great, Nina. Very well done indeed.

0:21:460:21:49

Yeah, best known for playing Archie in EastEnders and, of course,

0:21:510:21:55

the father in Gavin And Stacey as well. Larry Lamb.

0:21:550:21:57

Thanks very much, Richard. Now then, Charlotte.

0:21:570:22:00

It's getting harder.

0:22:000:22:01

Yep. I'm really struggling with this one.

0:22:030:22:04

So Mel, I know...

0:22:040:22:06

..but she's got a funny surname.

0:22:070:22:09

I think it's...

0:22:090:22:11

Oh, no. Stuart's going to hate me.

0:22:110:22:13

I think it's Mel Gildrick.

0:22:130:22:14

Gildrick? Gildrick. Can I say Gildrick?

0:22:160:22:19

Mel Gildrick. Mel Gildrick, says Charlotte.

0:22:190:22:21

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Mel Gildrick, if that's right.

0:22:210:22:25

No. I'm sorry, Charlotte, I'm afraid that's incorrect.

0:22:280:22:32

Scores you 100 points.

0:22:320:22:33

-Sorry, Charlotte. I'll give all the correct answers at the end of the pass.

-Of course.

0:22:330:22:37

Thank you very much. Now, well, we're about to come back down the line.

0:22:370:22:40

Before we do that, let's take a quick look at those scores.

0:22:400:22:42

28, Nina. Look at that.

0:22:420:22:43

The star of the pass, Nina, very much.

0:22:430:22:46

74 is where we find Tristan and Peter.

0:22:460:22:48

Then up to 100 where we find Stuart and Charlotte.

0:22:480:22:51

So, Stuart, yes, you know what we need from you.

0:22:510:22:53

And do you know what? I bet that's not the last 100 of the round.

0:22:530:22:56

OK, we're going to come back down the line.

0:22:560:22:58

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

0:22:580:23:01

OK, so remember, Stuart,

0:23:030:23:05

we're looking for the name of anyone pictured here with Pudsey Bear.

0:23:050:23:09

Yeah.

0:23:090:23:11

I'm in quite a similar position, as in that that I know it's Mel something.

0:23:110:23:16

I know the Strictly Come Dancing guy but I can't remember his name.

0:23:170:23:20

The rest of them,

0:23:210:23:23

I don't recognise them at all.

0:23:230:23:25

I think I'm going to have another stab at Mel.

0:23:270:23:30

Gedric.

0:23:300:23:31

Gedric. Mel Gedric.

0:23:310:23:33

-Yeah.

-Mel Gedric, says Stuart.

0:23:330:23:35

OK, there's no red line for you as you're the high scorers.

0:23:350:23:38

Let's see if that is right.

0:23:380:23:41

Let's see how many of our 100 people said it if it is.

0:23:410:23:43

Oh, I'm sorry.

0:23:480:23:50

I'm afraid that scores you 100 points - takes your total up to 200.

0:23:510:23:54

Yeah. Sorry.

0:23:540:23:56

Yeah. Thank you, Richard.

0:23:570:24:00

Tom. You get through to the next round, because Stuart and Charlotte

0:24:000:24:04

are so far ahead.

0:24:040:24:06

You won't overtake them, even if you score 100.

0:24:060:24:09

I think I know two, and I'm going to go for Linda Robson.

0:24:090:24:13

Linda Robson, says Tom.

0:24:130:24:15

Linda Robson. No red line. How many people said that?

0:24:150:24:18

It's right.

0:24:200:24:21

22.

0:24:270:24:28

22, taking your total up to 50.

0:24:300:24:32

The lovely Linda Robson from Birds Of A Feather and Loose Women

0:24:320:24:35

-and all sorts of things.

-Wonderful.

0:24:350:24:37

Thank you, Richard.

0:24:370:24:38

Peter, good news for you as well -

0:24:380:24:40

you are also going to be in the head-to-head, no matter what you score.

0:24:400:24:42

Do you want to talk us through it?

0:24:420:24:44

I presume the guy in the middle is Gareth Malone.

0:24:440:24:47

Is it Mel Giedroyc?

0:24:470:24:49

The only one I think I know is Alison Steadman so I'm going to go Alison Steadman.

0:24:510:24:54

Alison Steadman, says Peter.

0:24:540:24:56

No red line for you. You're already through.

0:24:560:24:57

How many of our 100 went for Alison Steadman?

0:24:570:24:59

It's right.

0:25:020:25:03

Oh, that's a great answer. Look at that. 10, Peter.

0:25:070:25:10

This is very impressive. 84 is your total.

0:25:110:25:13

Nicely done, Peter. There is Alison Steadman on the left in the middle.

0:25:140:25:17

Of course, married to Larry Lamb in Gavin And Stacey.

0:25:170:25:20

And thank you, Peter,

0:25:200:25:21

for pronouncing Mel Giedroyc's surname perfectly as well -

0:25:210:25:24

because I know she has about a million different pronunciations but Mel Giedroyc is the right one.

0:25:240:25:28

Mel would've scored you 25 points.

0:25:280:25:30

You're right about Gareth Malone, being right in the middle there.

0:25:300:25:33

He obviously put the all-star choir together.

0:25:330:25:35

He would have scored you 20.

0:25:350:25:36

There is a few good obscure answers here.

0:25:360:25:38

Top left there, that's the former footballer Fabrice Muamba -

0:25:380:25:42

would have scored you one point.

0:25:420:25:43

Next to him - he's slightly hidden -

0:25:430:25:45

so actually only scores 14 points but the unmistakable face...

0:25:450:25:48

-Of...

-..lovely John Craven.

0:25:480:25:51

No! Is that John Craven?

0:25:510:25:54

-Yeah.

-Who did you think it was?

0:25:540:25:56

I thought it was Christopher Biggins.

0:25:560:25:58

LAUGHTER

0:25:580:26:00

I was thinking, "Yes, he's largely hidden there."

0:26:000:26:03

The Biggins. It's John Craven.

0:26:030:26:05

Yeah, John Craven that is.

0:26:050:26:06

Next to him, from EastEnders, a wonderful comic actor as well, Nitin Ganatra.

0:26:060:26:11

One point for Nitin.

0:26:110:26:12

Craig Revel Horwood is the Strictly guy.

0:26:120:26:14

Would have scored you 33.

0:26:140:26:16

Just below him, a pointless answer - rugby player Margaret Alphonsi.

0:26:160:26:19

Very well done if you said that pointless answer.

0:26:190:26:21

Bottom left the corner there -

0:26:210:26:23

he's been on the show.

0:26:230:26:24

He was lovely,

0:26:240:26:25

Blue Peter presenter Radzi Chinyanganya.

0:26:250:26:27

And the only person we haven't mentioned right next to Gareth Malone there,

0:26:270:26:31

Alice Levine, who would have scored you one point.

0:26:310:26:33

There we are.

0:26:330:26:34

Gareth Malone. He looks a little bit like he's been superimposed

0:26:340:26:37

into that photograph, if I'm being perfectly honest.

0:26:370:26:40

Everybody else look like they're very much in the frame. Gareth...

0:26:400:26:44

-Superimposed in.

-Yeah, exactly.

0:26:440:26:45

And also I'll tell you who else looks a bit like they're superimposed in -

0:26:450:26:48

Christopher Biggins up there.

0:26:480:26:50

-Yeah.

-Doesn't he?

-Thank you very much, Richard.

0:26:500:26:53

So we are at the end of our second round.

0:26:530:26:55

And I'm afraid the pair we have to say goodbye to -

0:26:550:26:57

it's Stuart and Charlotte.

0:26:570:26:59

I mean, well done, two game attempts at Mel's surname,

0:26:590:27:01

and it is a tough one.

0:27:010:27:03

But we've now all learnt how to say it properly.

0:27:030:27:05

We will see you again next time, when I hope you'll do much better,

0:27:050:27:08

but in the meantime, thanks very much, Stuart and Charlotte. APPLAUSE

0:27:080:27:13

But for Tom and Nina, Peter and Tristan,

0:27:130:27:15

it's now time for our head-to-head.

0:27:150:27:17

Congratulations, Peter and Tristan, Tom and Nina.

0:27:220:27:25

You are now one step closer to the final and a chance to play for that jackpot,

0:27:250:27:28

which currently stands at £2,000.

0:27:280:27:31

APPLAUSE

0:27:310:27:34

Well, we've made it to this fun plateau of the head-to-head,

0:27:340:27:37

where you can start playing as teams and chat before you give your answers.

0:27:370:27:40

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

0:27:400:27:43

Now, Tom and Nina, you've done one better than you did last time -

0:27:430:27:46

through to the head-to-head.

0:27:460:27:47

Can you go one step further, I wonder, and make it through to the final?

0:27:470:27:50

It would be a fitting end to your Pointless careers.

0:27:500:27:52

However, you're up against Peter and Tristan, who've shown some form.

0:27:520:27:55

We've had some lovely low-scoring answers from them in both the rounds,

0:27:550:27:58

as we have from you, Nina, in that last round.

0:27:580:28:00

So I think this should be close.

0:28:000:28:01

Best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

0:28:010:28:04

APPLAUSE

0:28:040:28:10

Here is your first question and it concerns...

0:28:100:28:14

African capital cities,

0:28:160:28:17

-Richard.

-Yeah, I think if you were to have one single question

0:28:170:28:20

that would sum up the entire history of Pointless, it would be this.

0:28:200:28:22

I'm going to give you five anagrams now of African capital cities.

0:28:220:28:26

Can you unscramble them and give us the most obscure?

0:28:260:28:28

Thanks, Richard. Here are the five anagrams of African capital cities

0:28:280:28:32

and we have got...

0:28:320:28:33

Peter and Tristan, you've been our low scorers up to this point, so you will go first.

0:28:440:28:49

THEY WHISPER

0:28:490:28:56

We're going to go for the second one down - Mogadishu.

0:29:030:29:06

Mogadishu. Mogadishu, say Peter and Tristan.

0:29:060:29:09

Now then, Tom and Nina.

0:29:090:29:11

Do you fancy talking us through the others?

0:29:120:29:14

We think we know three others.

0:29:150:29:18

So there's Tunis at the bottom.

0:29:180:29:22

Nairobi.

0:29:220:29:23

And Rabat at the top.

0:29:230:29:26

And we're going to go for Rabat.

0:29:280:29:30

You're going to go for Rabat. So we have Mogadishu and we have Rabat.

0:29:300:29:34

Now then, Peter and Tristan went for Mogadishu.

0:29:340:29:36

Let's see if that's right, maid hog us. How many of our 100 got that?

0:29:360:29:39

16.

0:29:490:29:50

OK.

0:29:530:29:55

Peter and Tristan have thrown down their gauntlet at 16.

0:29:550:29:58

Tom and Nina, that's what you have to beat with Rabat.

0:29:580:30:01

A brat. There it is up there.

0:30:010:30:02

Let's see how many of our 100 people spotted Rabat.

0:30:020:30:05

It is Rabat.

0:30:080:30:09

Oh, it's going to be close.

0:30:120:30:13

Oh, it is close. Oh, 17!

0:30:130:30:17

Wow. I told you you'd be well matched.

0:30:170:30:20

Well done, Peter and Tristan. After one question, you are up 1-0.

0:30:200:30:24

That was close. The capital of Somalia beating the capital of Morocco.

0:30:240:30:28

Shall we fill in the rest of this board?

0:30:280:30:30

You were absolutely right, it's Tunis.

0:30:300:30:34

The capital of Tunisia, 35.

0:30:340:30:35

And Nairobi, Nairobi would have scored you 28.

0:30:350:30:39

And this is the best answer on the board.

0:30:390:30:41

It's got its name in the name of the country as well.

0:30:410:30:43

It's the capital of Guinea-Bissau.

0:30:430:30:45

And it's Bissau - would have scored you one point.

0:30:450:30:47

So very well done, if you said that at home.

0:30:470:30:49

Thanks very much, Richard. Here comes your second question.

0:30:490:30:52

Tom and Nina, you get to answer it first,

0:30:520:30:53

but you have to win it to stay in the game.

0:30:530:30:55

So good luck with that.

0:30:550:30:57

Our second question this afternoon is all about A Royal Education.

0:30:570:31:01

A Royal Education.

0:31:010:31:03

-Richard.

-We'll show you five pictures now of royals when they were in education.

0:31:030:31:07

Can you tell us the most obscure of these, please?

0:31:070:31:09

OK. Let's reveal our five royals in education. Here they are.

0:31:090:31:14

We've got...

0:31:140:31:15

And...

0:31:370:31:38

There we are. Five royals in education.

0:31:440:31:46

Tom and Nina, you'll go first this time.

0:31:460:31:48

THEY WHISPER

0:31:480:31:53

We're going to go with C, Zara Phillips.

0:32:020:32:05

C, Zara Phillips.

0:32:050:32:07

C, Zara Phillips, say Tom and Nina.

0:32:070:32:09

Now, Peter and Tristan, can you talk us through that board?

0:32:090:32:11

Not really. D is the Queen, I think.

0:32:130:32:16

B, you think is...?

0:32:160:32:17

-Is Will.

-Oh, is William. I think E is Viscount Linley.

0:32:170:32:20

A, I haven't got a clue.

0:32:200:32:24

I think on the basis that Zara Phillips would probably beat

0:32:240:32:27

the Queen or Prince William, shall we go for E, Viscount Linley?

0:32:270:32:31

-Yeah.

-You're going to go for Viscount Linley.

0:32:320:32:35

OK, so we have Zara Phillips and we have Viscount Linley.

0:32:350:32:37

Tom and Nina said Zara Phillips for C.

0:32:370:32:39

Let's see how many of our 100 people got that.

0:32:390:32:41

It's right.

0:32:450:32:46

50.

0:32:490:32:50

APPLAUSE

0:32:500:32:54

Peter and Tristan, taking a bit of a punt on E and saying Viscount Linley.

0:32:540:32:59

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people went for Viscount Linley.

0:32:590:33:03

It is Viscount Linley.

0:33:050:33:06

And, unsurprisingly, that wins you the point and takes you down to two.

0:33:090:33:13

Look at that! Very well done indeed, Peter and Tristan.

0:33:130:33:16

Good punt to take there.

0:33:160:33:18

And it means, after only two questions,

0:33:180:33:19

you're straight through to the final 2-0.

0:33:190:33:21

Yeah, very well done. How did you recognise Viscount Linley?

0:33:210:33:24

I don't know, I just recognised the face.

0:33:240:33:26

-Isn't that funny?

-I don't know.

0:33:260:33:27

That was when he was just going to audition for Oliver Twist.

0:33:270:33:30

Wasn't he just? I like the fact you went for it

0:33:300:33:32

because you thought your other two answers were too obvious,

0:33:320:33:34

and both of your other two answers were wrong! So, yeah -

0:33:340:33:38

that worked out very nicely, didn't it?

0:33:380:33:40

The top answer is a very good scorer, the top answer, that is...

0:33:400:33:43

I would say Edward VII.

0:33:430:33:44

It is Edward VII.

0:33:440:33:46

And would have scored you three points.

0:33:460:33:48

Now, the second one, it's not Prince William - it's Prince George.

0:33:480:33:52

It's his son. That's cute. Wrong answer, though.

0:33:520:33:54

He would have scored 61 points.

0:33:540:33:57

And equally, D is not the Queen - it's her sister.

0:33:570:34:01

-Princess Margaret.

-Princess Margaret, yeah.

0:34:010:34:02

And that would have scored 14.

0:34:020:34:04

There we are. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

0:34:040:34:07

So the pair leaving us, I'm afraid, at the end of the head-to-head round,

0:34:070:34:10

Tom and Nina. This is where we say goodbye.

0:34:100:34:12

Much better performance this time.

0:34:120:34:14

Great to have you in the head-to-head

0:34:140:34:15

but I'm sorry you didn't get a better shot at the final.

0:34:150:34:17

But you've done very well.

0:34:170:34:19

Tom and Nina, it's been great having you on the show. Thanks very much for playing.

0:34:190:34:22

APPLAUSE

0:34:220:34:24

But for Peter and Tristan, it's now time for our Pointless final.

0:34:240:34:27

APPLAUSE

0:34:270:34:31

Congratulations, Peter and Tristan,

0:34:310:34:33

you've seen off the competition and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

0:34:330:34:38

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

0:34:430:34:45

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £2,000.

0:34:450:34:50

APPLAUSE

0:34:500:34:54

Well, there's no arguing with your performance right across the show.

0:34:540:34:57

It's been very strong - 2-0 in the head-to-head.

0:34:570:35:00

Any citizens' advice you would give yourselves at this point, Peter?

0:35:000:35:04

-Don't panic.

-Don't panic.

0:35:040:35:06

Yeah, absolutely, particularly in this last round.

0:35:060:35:08

You'll know what these boards are like.

0:35:080:35:10

Quite often they look quite forbidding.

0:35:100:35:11

Quite often, there's something inside you should be able to have a go at.

0:35:110:35:15

But let's hope one of the topics on today's board fits the bill for you.

0:35:150:35:19

Today's selection looks like this.

0:35:190:35:20

-Not musicals.

-Definitely not musicals. No.

0:35:320:35:36

Sporting Williams?

0:35:360:35:37

-I mean, it could be anything.

-Just Williams surname, sporting figures.

0:35:370:35:41

-Tolkien.

-You know Tolkien.

0:35:410:35:43

Not that...you know Tolkien as well as I do.

0:35:430:35:45

Yeah, we both like Lord Of The Rings.

0:35:450:35:47

I mean, do you want to go for Tolkien?

0:35:470:35:50

It will give us a punt on something, won't it?

0:35:500:35:53

Yeah, we'll have a go at that.

0:35:530:35:54

On the basis we don't think we know much about anything else,

0:35:540:35:56

we're going to go for Tolkien.

0:35:560:35:58

Tolkien. OK, Tolkien it is.

0:35:580:36:00

Also on the basis that you both know a lot about Tolkien as well.

0:36:000:36:04

To be fair. It's three different questions.

0:36:040:36:05

If you know your Tolkien, I suspect you'll do very, very well.

0:36:050:36:08

We're looking for any of the following, please.

0:36:080:36:10

We're looking for the names of any of the 13 dwarves that set out with

0:36:100:36:13

Bilbo and Gandalf on the journey to the Lonely Mountain in The Hobbit.

0:36:130:36:16

We're looking for any of the chapter titles in the Lord Of The Rings trilogy.

0:36:160:36:19

So any of the chapter titles in The Fellowship Of The Ring,

0:36:190:36:22

The Two Towers and The Return Of The King.

0:36:220:36:24

Or we're looking for any of Bilbo's party guests in the Fellowship Of The Ring.

0:36:240:36:27

That's any of the surnames of the families of hobbits invited by

0:36:270:36:31

Bilbo to dine in the pavilion.

0:36:310:36:32

So the dwarves in The Hobbit, any of those 13 dwarves, please.

0:36:320:36:35

The chapter titles in Lord Of The Rings,

0:36:350:36:37

or the family surnames of any of Bilbo's party guests in the Fellowship Of The ring.

0:36:370:36:42

Good luck.

0:36:420:36:44

OK. Now, as always, you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers.

0:36:440:36:48

All you need to win that jackpot is for just one of your answers to be

0:36:480:36:52

pointless. Are you ready?

0:36:520:36:53

-Yeah.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

0:36:530:36:56

There they are. Your time starts now.

0:36:560:36:58

You've seen the film The Hobbit, haven't you?

0:36:580:37:00

Yeah. I'm trying to remember the names of the dwarves.

0:37:000:37:03

Chapter titles in The Lord Of The rings -

0:37:030:37:05

we're not going to get many of the chapter titles but wasn't there one

0:37:050:37:08

about Tales of Tom Bombadil which wasn't from the films?

0:37:080:37:11

-The towers?

-The Tales of Tom Bombadil, which is part of the book, wasn't it?

0:37:110:37:15

But was that a chapter title?

0:37:150:37:18

-Let's go with that.

-Go for that. You know Bilbo's party guests?

0:37:180:37:21

What were the name of the really annoying family that he doesn't...

0:37:210:37:23

They're like unwanted guests.

0:37:230:37:25

The neighbours of...

0:37:270:37:28

-The Bagginses.

-Think of the dwarves.

0:37:300:37:33

-Cos you've seen the films, haven't you?

-Um...

0:37:330:37:37

Bodril or something like that.

0:37:370:37:39

Bodril. That ringing a bell?

0:37:390:37:42

-Go for Bodril.

-OK.

0:37:420:37:44

And...

0:37:440:37:46

What was the name of the...?

0:37:460:37:47

-10 seconds left.

-..of the king dwarf?

0:37:470:37:49

It's not coming.

0:37:540:37:55

-No, let's just go with that.

-OK.

0:37:570:37:59

-OK.

-That is your time up. Let's have your three answers.

0:37:590:38:02

Well, we're going to go for Bodril.

0:38:020:38:03

-Bodril.

-For the dwarves in The Hobbit.

0:38:030:38:06

We're going to try for The Tales Of Tom Bombadil for one of the chapter

0:38:060:38:09

-titles in the Lord Of The Rings.

-The Tales of Tom Bombadil. Yeah.

0:38:090:38:12

And the Bagginses in the party guests

0:38:120:38:15

cos there must have been some other of Bilbo's relatives.

0:38:150:38:17

OK, some Bagginses. Exactly.

0:38:170:38:19

You couldn't have a party without asking the relatives, surely.

0:38:190:38:22

-That's true.

-Of those three, which is your most confident answer?

0:38:220:38:25

Well, I think we'll go for the...

0:38:250:38:27

Shall we go for the chapter title, The Tales Of Tom Bombadil?

0:38:270:38:29

OK. Bombadil goes last.

0:38:290:38:31

Least likely to be pointless?

0:38:310:38:33

-Bodril?

-Bodril.

0:38:330:38:35

Bodril. And then we'll put Baggins in in the middle.

0:38:350:38:37

OK, well, let's put those three answers on the board in that order, then. And here they are.

0:38:370:38:41

We have got...

0:38:410:38:42

Well, very, very best of luck.

0:38:470:38:49

Three answers on the boards - who knows?

0:38:490:38:51

One of them might be a brilliant pointless answer.

0:38:510:38:53

If that were to be the case and you were to win £2,000,

0:38:530:38:56

what would you do with your spoils? Peter, you first.

0:38:560:38:59

Well, the correct answer would be, I'd treat the wife and take her away,

0:38:590:39:02

but probably the incorrect one is I'd spend it on my season ticket for next season.

0:39:020:39:07

OK, where's that?

0:39:070:39:08

Stamford Bridge. Sorry.

0:39:080:39:09

Right. Tristan.

0:39:090:39:11

Yeah, so it's Mum's birthday - 60th, next year, so we might treat her.

0:39:120:39:16

I'm glad at least one of you remembered that, Tristan.

0:39:160:39:19

-Favourite son.

-Yeah.

0:39:190:39:21

Well said.

0:39:210:39:22

Good luck. Three answers on the board.

0:39:240:39:25

Let's hope they're all right.

0:39:250:39:27

Bodril was your first answer.

0:39:270:39:28

In this case, we were looking for dwarves in The Hobbit.

0:39:280:39:31

Bodril. I mean, it sounds right, doesn't it?

0:39:310:39:34

If it is right and if it's pointless, it will win you £2,000.

0:39:340:39:36

How many people said Bodril?

0:39:360:39:38

No. Bad luck, I'm afraid.

0:39:420:39:44

Bodril, an incorrect answer.

0:39:440:39:46

So obviously not pointless,

0:39:460:39:47

which means we only have two more shots at today's jackpot.

0:39:470:39:50

Your next answer was the Bagginses.

0:39:500:39:52

We were looking for the surnames of Bilbo's party guests.

0:39:520:39:55

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of 100 people went for the Bagginses.

0:39:560:40:00

For £2,000, is it pointless?

0:40:000:40:02

It's right.

0:40:050:40:06

Well, your first answer, Bodril, was incorrect, your second answer,

0:40:070:40:10

the Bagginses, is absolutely on the money.

0:40:100:40:12

Down it goes through the 30s, to 38.

0:40:120:40:15

APPLAUSE

0:40:150:40:19

Which means...

0:40:190:40:20

-Bit of a relief getting one right.

-Only one more shot at today's jackpot, though.

0:40:200:40:23

Your last answer, The Tales Of Tom Bombadil.

0:40:230:40:27

Now, Peter, you came up with this quite confidently during your minute

0:40:270:40:30

quite early on, as a chapter heading from The Lord Of The Rings.

0:40:300:40:33

Let's find out if it's right, then let's find out if it's pointless.

0:40:330:40:36

For £2,000, how many people went for The Tales Of Tom Bombadil?

0:40:360:40:40

Oh, no. Bad luck.

0:40:430:40:45

Oh.

0:40:450:40:46

APPLAUSE

0:40:460:40:49

Well, that was a punishing final round.

0:40:490:40:52

I mean, a very strong performance right the way through the show,

0:40:520:40:56

until we got to this last round and then you went for Tolkien, which,

0:40:560:40:58

as I was saying, we're going to know lots of these names, I'm sure,

0:40:580:41:01

when we see them up on the board.

0:41:010:41:02

But very hard to conjure up, isn't it, when that minute's ticking by?

0:41:020:41:06

But sadly, you didn't find a pointless answer,

0:41:060:41:08

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £2,000.

0:41:080:41:11

That will roll over on to the next show.

0:41:110:41:12

But, as I say, great performance right across the show.

0:41:120:41:15

Been great having you on. Lovely to meet you both and you get a

0:41:150:41:17

Pointless trophy each to take home, so there's always that.

0:41:170:41:20

Thank you.

0:41:200:41:21

APPLAUSE

0:41:210:41:22

Yeah, it was a valiant effort.

0:41:250:41:26

Terrific effort all the way through the show as well.

0:41:260:41:29

Let's go through your answers one by one. Yeah, the Bagginses is a big score.

0:41:290:41:32

The annoying family you were thinking of were their cousins,

0:41:320:41:34

-the Sackville-Baggins.

-Oh, yeah.

0:41:340:41:36

That would have been a pointless answer, a terrific one.

0:41:360:41:39

The Tales Of Tom Bombadil.

0:41:390:41:40

There's poetry called The Adventures Of Tom Bombadil and there is also a

0:41:400:41:43

chapter in Lord Of The Rings which is called In The House Of Tom Bombadil.

0:41:430:41:47

And that was a pointless answer as well.

0:41:470:41:49

Bodril, I'm afraid, was not one of the dwarves.

0:41:490:41:51

I think you got mixed up because Bodril is the name of the hot beef drink

0:41:510:41:54

that they drink on the journey, I'm afraid.

0:41:540:41:56

So that's unlucky.

0:41:560:41:58

Now, let's go through all of the pointless answers.

0:41:580:42:01

There's only two pointless answers in the dwarf category.

0:42:010:42:03

Very well done if you said any of those. Everyone else scored points.

0:42:060:42:08

Lots and lots of chapter titles were pointless answers.

0:42:080:42:12

Let's take a look at a few of them.

0:42:120:42:14

In fact, the only chapter titles that scored any points at all were A Knife In The Dark,

0:42:200:42:24

Many Meetings and Mount Doom.

0:42:240:42:25

Every other chapter title, if you got one of them,

0:42:250:42:27

you'd have got yourself a pointless answer.

0:42:270:42:29

And the final one. Some of those families.

0:42:290:42:32

Every family except the Bagginses, the Tooks, the Proudfoots,

0:42:360:42:38

the Brandybucks and the Boffins.

0:42:380:42:40

All the other families were pointless.

0:42:400:42:41

Well, it's been fun reading out those names, at least.

0:42:410:42:44

-Hasn't it?

-Yeah.

-Hasn't it just?

0:42:440:42:46

Thank you, Richard. Well, very sadly,

0:42:460:42:48

Peter and Tristan didn't win our jackpot today,

0:42:480:42:50

which means it rolls over on to the next show, when we will be playing

0:42:500:42:54

for £3,000.

0:42:540:42:55

APPLAUSE

0:42:550:42:58

Join us then and see if someone can win it.

0:42:580:43:00

Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

0:43:000:43:01

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

0:43:010:43:04

APPLAUSE

0:43:040:43:06

Quiz in which contestants try to score as few points as possible by plumbing the depths of their general knowledge to come up with the answers no-one else can think of. Presented by Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman.


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