Episode 9 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong

and welcome to Pointless, the show where the aim of the game

is to avoid the obvious answers and find the obscure ones.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

My name's Adrian. This is my son, Max.

And we're from Trowbridge in Wiltshire.

Couple number two.

Hello, my name is Nigel. This is my lovely wife, Sue.

And we're from the sporting capital of England, Leicester.

Couple number three.

Hello again, I'm Gyasuddin, and this is my younger sibling Kulsum,

-and we're from Blackburn.

-And finally, couple number four.

Hello, my name is Thomas. This is my friend, Aled.

And we're from Pontypridd in South Wales.

And these are today's contestants. APPLAUSE

Thanks very much, all of you. A very warm welcome to Pointless.

Great to have you here. We'll get a chance to chat to each of you

throughout the show as it goes along.

So that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

More positive than a weekend at a self-belief seminar,

it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hiya. Hey, everybody. Afternoon.

-APPLAUSE

-Good afternoon to you.

-And to you.

-Now, three returning pairs.

It seems unfair, we've put our new pair on podium one.

Poor old Adrian and Max.

And we cleverly go in order of how well people did

from podium four onwards.

Well, we'll start with podium two,

where Nigel and Sue got all the way through to the head-to-head.

Gyasuddin and Kulsum got through to Round Two.

And Round One, unfortunately,

for our gents there on the fourth podium,

where Thomas gave the best answer possible pretty much,

gave an unbelievably good answer.

Aled, I'm going to say less so.

Certainly, if one of them has some making up to do, it's Aled.

That's all I'm saying. It won't happen, Aled, I'm sure,

because you're a very bright man.

I'll tell you what I'm wrestling with.

Adrian is Max's dad.

And you think he looks like his brother?

He could be his older brother.

Well, is there a way we can ask without alerting them to the fact

-that we're asking?

-I don't know, could be a bit awkward.

-In your chat, why don't you...?

-Maybe in my chat, I'll just ask,

I'll come right out with it and just say...

Just ask what year he was born in or something like that.

-Well...

-That's the way to do it, isn't it?

What was the number one when you were born? Something like that.

-Yes, that's a really good idea.

-Then we can look it up.

-I'll look it up and I'll tell you.

-Got it.

-Boom. That's a great idea.

Lovely. Thank you very much indeed.

Now, Linda and Liz didn't win our jackpot last time,

which means we add another £1,000 to that,

so today's jackpot starts off at £3,000.

There we are. APPLAUSE

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, only one thing to remember as ever and that is this -

the pair with the highest score at the end of each round will be

eliminated, so do what you can to make sure you are not that pair.

Very best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category today...

Literature. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

Whoever's going first, please, step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

-Richard.

-Yeah, on each board we're going to show you some lists of

characters who all appeared in certain novels.

You just need to tell us the name of the novel, please.

It's going to be 14 novels in all to guess at home. Good luck.

OK, so we're looking for the novels that first featured these characters

and here's our first board of seven.

It reads like this. We've got...

I'll read those all again.

Max...look at that. Our newcomers, on podium one, welcome to Pointless.

-Great to have you here from Trowbridge.

-Yes.

What do you do, Max?

I'm a student at uni at the minute. I'm in UWE in Bristol.

Very good, and what do you study?

-Studying journalism.

-And you're in your first year?

-Yeah, just finished my first year.

-So at this stage it's still pretty

-general journalism, is it, you're not...?

-Yeah, yeah,

we tend to specialise in the third year,

so still getting into it at the minute.

-Getting an idea where you might want to specialise?

-Sports, probably.

-Sports.

-A big sport fan, so...

Max, can I ask if you took a year out before university?

Or did you go straight to university?

-I went straight to university.

-And you're in the first year?

-I am.

-OK...

-This is all... This is all very good background.

-I've got that.

-Just good background stuff.

-Yeah.

Very good. Max, how is your literature?

Um...it can be good,

but with this board, it doesn't look like it's going to be.

I'm just going to have to take a random guess.

I'm going to have to go with Pride And Prejudice for...

Arthur Dent, Ford Prefect and Zaphod Beeblebrox.

-That's just...the first one that came into my mind.

-OK!

Zaphod Beeblebrox, Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect...

Pride And Prejudice. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people got that.

No. No.

Little bit after Jane Austen's time. 100 points for you, then.

First one that came into my head.

Yes, she missed a trick there, didn't she,

not having a character called Zaphod Beeblebrox in Pride And Prejudice?

That would have made that film a bit more interesting.

I'll say. Thanks very much, Richard.

Sue, welcome back.

Sue, what do you do?

I'm a study skills tutor at De Montford University,

and I'm kind of a part-time artist.

Now what sort of art do you do?

I design and print my own materials and do up old furniture and...

So you go out and find sort of things in junk shops and...

-Yes.

-And up... What do they call it? Up something?

-Up-cycle.

-Up-cycle, is what you do.

-Yeah.

-So what's the most ambitious thing you've done?

I've just done a really nice button backed chair for a customer.

Oh, fantastic. That sounds great.

Sue, now, what about these characters from novels?

Um, well, I had a quick panic there,

but I'm going to go for the fourth one down

and Rebecca.

Rebecca. Rebecca for Mrs Danvers, et al.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Rebecca.

It's right.

Well, you passed our high score

the minute you came down the column there.

19 for Rebecca. Very well done indeed.

Yeah, by Daphne du Maurier, of course.

Mrs de Winter narrates the novel

and is married in that novel to

-Zaphod Beeblebrox.

-That's right. LAUGHTER

Thank you very much indeed.

Kulsum, welcome back to Pointless.

-Remind us what you do.

-I'm a research assistant,

working in stroke research at university.

And what do you like getting up to when you're not hard at work?

Um, mainly keeping active, running and going to the gym,

-that sort of thing.

-Very good indeed.

-Do you read much?

-Erm... I used to, not so much any more.

Um, this board isn't looking great for me.

-OK.

-Um...

-This is good news for Max.

-Possibly.

-Yeah.

What would you like to go for there?

Going to take a bit of a risk and go with the second one,

-Yossarian and co.

-Yeah.

And say Catch-22.

Catch-22, says Kulsum.

Let's see if that's right for Minderbinder, etc.

Let's see how many of our 100 people got it, if it's right, Catch-22.

It's right. Very well done indeed, Kulsum.

You are now approaching 19,

passing 19. There you are, our new low score.

Very, very well done indeed,

Catch-22, 14.

Yeah, terrific answer, Kulsum. Very well played.

Obviously it's introduced the whole concept of catch-22

into the English language.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now, Aled, welcome back.

-Hello.

-Welcome back. Far too soon we had to say goodbye to you last time.

Remind us what you do, Aled.

I'm a teacher's assistant at a primary school.

A teacher's assistant at a primary school

and remind us what your hobbies are.

My hobby, which I went into a lot last time, was radio.

Radio.

It's fantastic, you have a late-night show,

-don't you, on local radio?

-Yes, that's right.

Do you get to choose everything you do on that show?

Is it a complete free swim, or...?

I like to make it as equal as I can

but every now and then I do slip in a few personal favourites.

Not meant to, not meant to.

-Oh, really?

-No.

-Are you given a playlist?

Bit of a slap on the wrist if you change it, yeah.

But you're given a kind of broad range of so-and-so from the charts.

-Right.

-And so-and-so of your choice.

-Brilliant.

-Now, Aled, this board is all yours.

-Do you want to talk us through it and fill in all the blanks?

-Right.

Once we reached there, I had two answers I knew.

And they haven't been taken,

so I knew tactically there I was safe from here on.

-Right.

-So it's either...

Well, I'm going to be biased and choose the one that I adore

and I love Douglas Adams,

so I'm going to go for Arthur Dent, Ford Prefect and Zaphod Beeblebrox,

with Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy.

Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy says Aled.

Let's see how many of our 100 people

got Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy.

It's right. Well, 100 was our high score.

You passed that a while ago.

19 is the next high score.

34.

Not bad at all, Aled. 34.

It's better than my personal best, isn't it?

-It certainly is.

-Well played, Aled. That's more like it, isn't it?

It's more fun when you know them. Now let's fill in these.

Jean Valjean, etc?

-Is Les Mis.

-Les Miserables, yeah.

All of these have been films as well. 25 points for that.

Elizabeth Bennet, Fitzwilliam Darcy?

Now THAT'S Pride And Prejudice.

That is Pride And Prejudice. Max, yeah, unlucky.

40 points for that. Athos, Porthos, Aramis?

-Three Musketeers.

-Three Musketeers.

For 58. And do you know the bottom one?

-Jack Torrance, Danny Torrance?

-I do, it's The Shining.

It is The Shining. Absolutely. And that would have scored 5 points.

Well done if you said that at home, best answer there.

Thank you, Richard. We're halfway through the rounds,

so let's take a look at those scores. 14, very well done, Kulsum.

You are the low scorer there.

I hope that gets you into the next round.

Then up to 19, where we find Sue and Nigel.

Then up to 34,

where we find Aled and Thomas. Then up to 100,

where we find Max and Adrian.

Mm. Yeah...

Very, very best of luck with finding a nice low score, Adrian.

Who knows? There might be another 100 scored in the next pass.

You don't know. But a low score from you is definitely what we will need.

We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, now, let's put seven more sets of characters from novels

up on the board and here they are.

We have got...

I'm going to read those all again.

Thomas, welcome back to Pointless. Remind us what you do, Thomas.

I am currently a master's student studying health,

sport and exercise science at the University of South Wales.

Right, and you've got one more year of that.

No, I'm doing my dissertation now over the summer.

Brilliant, well, what are your interests, Thomas?

I enjoy music and watching sport, so...

Very good. What kind? Do you play music?

-Do you play an instrument?

-I sadly don't play music.

I wish I did, but I go to a lot of gigs all the time.

Do you sing, Thomas?

Badly, in my own free time, but...

That's OK. At least it's not on anyone else's time, Thomas!

Bad singing on someone else's time is unforgivable.

There you are on 34. You should be able to get through.

65 is your target before anyone else has even answered.

So, yes, let's hope. Aled's set you up pretty well there.

What would you like to go for?

Cos the pressure is off due to Adrian and Max's score,

I'll go for Katniss Everdeen, Peeta Mellark and Effie Trinket,

-for The Hunger Games.

-The Hunger Games, says Thomas.

Vigorous nods all around. There's your red line.

If you get below that with The Hunger Games, you're definitely

through to the next round. But let's see how far down we get.

It's right.

And you're through! Look at that!

Down it goes. A surprisingly low score.

30, taking you up to 64.

Very comfortably through the line, too.

Well played, Thomas. By Suzanne Collins.

It spent over six years on the New York Times' bestsellers' list.

-Thank you very much indeed. Gyasuddin, welcome back.

-Thank you.

Good to have you here. Remind us what you do?

I'm a pharmacist working in a community village pharmacy.

Where we sell the special salts.

You... HE LAUGHS

Special...? Exactly. The boutique pharmacist.

-That's the one.

-It's not a chain, it's a boutique.

Nice soaps. Very good indeed.

Yes, being a village pharmacist, I mean, you're in the background.

You have a direct line to what's wrong

-with everyone in the village, then?

-We do, yeah.

Well, I've been at this village pharmacy for about eight years now.

-Right.

-And they count me as part of the community now

and they all come in with all their problems,

whether medical or nonmedical!

My father was a doctor.

And when my voice broke, I started to sound quite like him.

And so if I ever answered the telephone at home,

people would just tell me what was wrong with them, until I could go,

"Stop, stop, I'm not him!"

Gyasuddin, there you are on 14.

If you can score 85 or less, you're definitely through.

Well, literature is definitely not one of my strong points.

And I only knew two answers on the board and one of them has gone.

So, I'm going to go for Heathcliff, Catherine Earnshaw and Mr Lockwood -

-Wuthering Heights.

-Wuthering Heights, says Gyasuddin.

Here is your red line. If you can get below that

with Wuthering Heights, you're straight through to the next round.

How many people said Wuthering Heights?

It's right,

-and you are through. Well done.

-Good job.

Not bad at all. 52.

66, your total.

Yeah, well played. It's her only novel, of course,

but they say she did write another one that's never been found.

-Never been found.

-Have they looked in the drawer?

No. No-one has actually looked.

-They should look.

-Yeah, no, they should look.

They said, "Look, at some point we will look but it's a mess in there."

-So they haven't.

-Thank you very much indeed.

-Now, Nigel, welcome back to Pointless.

-Thank you.

Remind us what you do, Nigel?

I'm a technician.

I work for the county council on assistive technology.

That's right. We heard about assistive technology last time.

Remind me what that is! NIGEL LAUGHS

I remember, but for the people who don't.

I forget frequently.

We put equipment into people's houses

to help them live independently.

Now that's a brilliant thing. Assistive technology.

A wonderful thing. Helping people to live independently.

A great thing. Now, Nigel, what are your hobbies?

I've recently taken up walking football.

-OK. Right. That's one up from sedentary football...

-It is!

..where people just go around on stools.

Only just. That's very much like we all look.

It's basically a way of getting old men back into football.

-That's quite fun.

-Because we can no longer run.

How long before you all break into runs, though?

Or is it you're absolutely not allowed to run?

No. It's not allowed to run, and basically most of us can't anyway.

It's essentially, if you ever been to see Fulham play,

-it's essentially that.

-LAUGHTER

That's extraordinary. Seriously, what constitutes a run?

You must keep one foot on the ground at all times and then apparently

-you're walking.

-That must look hilarious.

-It does.

-Now, Nigel, there you are, you're on 19.

Our high-scorers, Adrian and Max, are on 100.

So 80 or less gets you through.

OK. Boo Radley etc are in

To Catch A Mockingbird.

To Catch A Mockingbird. To Catch A Mockingbird, says Nigel.

OK, here is your red line.

You have to go below that red line.

Is that a right answer? Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

No.

No, Nigel.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer. That scores you 100 points.

It takes your total up to 119.

Ooh, Adrian! Adrian.

-Wow.

-Wow!

-We could have a chance?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, sorry, Nigel.

I will give all the correct answers at the end of the pass.

Thank you very much indeed.

Now then, Adri... How old are you, Adrian?!

LAUGHTER

-I'm 44.

-Are you really?

-Good nick for 44.

-Lots of sport, lots of drinking water.

Lots of sport, lots of drink...and water.

-There we are.

-Next to whisky!

Now, Adrian, what do you do?

I'm a business development manager for a fire sprinkler company.

For a fire sprinkler company?

Yeah. So we put fire sprinklers into residential properties.

This is where all the water comes?

To get that complexion, so youthful!

That's quite fun, isn't it?

Yeah, I'm mainly in the sort of sales contract side of it.

Oh, I see. So you don't get to test it?

-No. I've never seen one go off in the...

-No?

..in the five years I've been doing this.

-Many complaints coming through? No?

-No.

-Good stuff.

Now, Adrian, you have been handed

the most enormous and unexpected lifeline there

by Nigel and Sue, who I have to say are our most qualified players today

in terms of how they performed last time.

If you can score 18 or less...

That's a big ask.

Winston Smith is 1984.

And Boo Radley is To Kill A Mockingbird.

I'm going to go for To Kill A Mockingbird out of those two.

To KILL A Mockingbird. I'm sorry, Nigel.

You are thinking of To Catch A Thief.

Maybe. To Kill A Mockingbird.

HE SIGHS

Here is your red line. You have to get below that

with To Kill A Mockingbird.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said To Kill A Mockingbird.

Well, let's see, are you go to get below that red line?

No! Oh, no! 20!

I can't believe it!

What a knife-edge close

to our exciting first round.

Takes your total up to 120.

Wow.

Blimey, you got away with that, Nigel, didn't you?

The confidence with which you gave

To Catch A Mockingbird was wonderful.

And so many people at home would have gone,

"Yeah, To Catch A Mockingbird."

And it's, yeah, To Kill A Mockingbird.

The top one, Holden Caulfield

is The Killer In The Rye.

It's The Catcher In The Rye, forgive me.

11 points for that. I think maybe in your head, you had both of them.

-Possibly.

-You mixed them up a little bit.

Winston Smith, Julia etc was 1984.

Would have scored you even more points, though,

would have scored you 45. Estella, Joe Gargery and Miss Havisham?

-Great Expectations.

-Great Expectations.

25. The best answer on the board, Dorothea Brooke etc

-is...?

-Middlemarch.

-Middlemarch, yeah.

That would have scored you 1 point.

So very well done if you said that.

Thank you very much indeed.

So at the end of our first round, the pair who are heading home

with their high score of 120, I'm afraid,

Adrian and Max. Not a bad score from you.

But, Max, the Jane Austen/ Zaphod Beeblebrox mashup there,

was, I'm afraid, a costly one. But we'll see you again next time.

I'm sure you'll get further then. But in the meantime,

thanks very much, Adrian and Max.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Look at that, suddenly we're down to three pairs.

Ooh, it just happens like that, doesn't it?

And then at the end of this round, we'll be down to two.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two today is...

It's Eurovision. Can you decide on your pairs

who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

-Richard?

-In a moment, we're going to show you 12 flags on this board,

and we're looking for the name of any act

that has won the Eurovision Song Contest

for one of these countries, please.

I see. Thank you very much indeed.

OK, so now we're going to show you an image, as Richard says,

with various flags on. That image is going to stay up

for the whole round.

You just have to say the name of any acts that you think might correspond

with one of these flags. Here is the image.

There we go.

12 flags.

Sue, we start with you.

Erm...

-Lulu.

-Lulu, says Sue. Lulu.

Let's see if it's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

Absolutely right.

Fantastic. 8 for Lulu.

What a great score. A good start to the round.

Yeah, Boom Bang-A-Bang was a joint winner.

-Four winners that year. But Lulu was one of them.

-Those were the days.

When was the last time there were four joint winners?

Well, I'd imagine then - 1969.

France, Spain and the Netherlands also won that year.

-Which is virtually everyone who was in it!

-Yeah.

Thank you very much indeed.

-Now, Kulsum.

-I can think of some...

..that I think might be fairly obvious.

But I'm going to go with someone whose flag I hope is up there.

I'm going to say Conchita?

Conchita.

We might need more than just Conchita.

There were two names there.

I haven't the foggiest!

I might have to go with my code word for when I don't know it,

and say Conchita Flapjacks.

LAUGHTER

That is the most extraordinary coincidence.

I've always said, one of these days, it's going to happen.

But...

Conchita Flapjacks, let's see if that's right.

Oh, I'm sorry!

Oh, Conchita Flapjacks is such a good name.

There you are. 100 is what that scores you, I'm afraid.

Yeah, sorry, Kulsum, but Conchita Flapjacks is a brilliant name.

If we don't have Conchita Flapjacks

representing us in the next few years...

It's a great name.

There we go. Now, Thomas.

-What would you like to go for?

-I was struggling with the first name

of the answer on podium two.

So now I've got the first name, I'll go for Conchita Wurst.

Conchita Wurst, says Thomas.

Conchita Wurst. Let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Conchita Wurst.

It's right.

Look at that! 3 for Conchita Wurst.

Very well done.

Yeah, well done, Thomas. Rise Like A Phoenix won for Austria.

There's the Austrian flag.

Thank you very much. Well, we're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores. 3, the best score of the pass.

Thomas and Aled looking very strong at this point, I might add.

Then up to 8 where we find Sue and Nigel.

Than 100, Kulsum and Gyasuddin.

So, yes, we're going to need a low score from you.

You never know what will happen in the next pass, Gyasuddin,

so a nice low score might be enough.

We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second person please step up to the podium?

Now then, Aled.

Aled... I mean, for a seasoned radioman like you,

I'd have thought this is just a walk in the park, a round like this,

-isn't it?

-It's music in the broadest of senses, isn't it?

But may I just say, Conchita would probably have been my go-to.

But the other one that I've got is Lordi.

WELSH ACCENT: Lordi?

That's good. Is that how we should be saying it?

It's how I am saying it!

-LAUGHTER

-Who knows?

-Lordi.

OK, I'm going to say it like that, too. 96. There's your red line.

If you can get below that, you are through.

Lordi. Sounds great like that.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right and you're through.

Very well done.

8 for Lordi.

Taking your total up to 11.

-Very good.

-Well played, Aled.

They mean business today, those boys, don't they?

Yeah, won in 2006 for Finland

with Hard Rock Hallelujah.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now then, Gyasuddin...

-I'm struggling with this one!

-Oh!

Erm...

Catherine And The Waves, is it?

Catherine And The Waves.

-I'm not sure if that's right but...

-Catherine And The Flapjacks.

Let's see. Is it right? No red line for you. You're the highest scorers.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Catherine And The Waves.

Oh, bad luck, Gyasuddin. I'm sorry.

That's another incorrect answer,

taking your total up to 200.

Yeah, joining the 200 club, I'm afraid.

I'll give all the answers at the end of the pass.

Thank very much indeed.

Now then, Nigel, what would you like to go for?

-Sandie Shaw.

-Sandie Shaw says Nigel.

No red line for you.

You're already through. But let's see how many of our 100 people

said Sandie Shaw.

It's right.

26 for Sandie Shaw.

34 is your total.

Yeah, Puppet On A String, also a UK number one, won in 1967.

Now, let's look through some of these answers, shall we?

You've got Israel in the top left.

Dana International would have scored you 7.

Milk And Honey would have scored you 1.

And Izhar Cohen And The Alphabeta was a pointless answer.

Spain, Massiel, 1. Salome was a pointless answer.

Sweden, four pointless answers.

Mans Zelmerlow, who won in 2015.

Charlotte Nilsson, Herreys and Carola.

One point for Loreen.

And the highest answer on the board, unsurprisingly, Abba with 51.

Denmark there and three pointless answers here as well.

Emmelie de Forest, Grethe and Jorgen Ingmann

and the Olsen Brothers are all pointless answers.

Ireland, should be some scorers here.

Johnny Logan would have scored you 14.

Dana would have scored you 16.

And pointless answers, Eimear Quinn, Linda Martin, Niamh Kavanagh,

and Paul Harrington and Charlie McGettigan.

So very well done if you said any of those. The next flag is Azerbaijan.

Ell and Nikki would have been a pointless answer there.

Austria, we've had Conchita Wurst,

but also Udo Jurgens would've been a pointless answer.

Now the UK - we've had Sandie Shaw and Lulu.

Katrina And The Waves, Gyasuddin,

Katrina And The Waves would have scored you 13 points.

Buck's Fizz would have scored you 37 points.

Bigger scorer anyway. And 10 points for Brotherhood Of Man.

And Switzerland, Lys Assia was a pointless answer.

Celine Dion who, of course, famously won for Switzerland

would have scored you 4 points.

Norway, Alexander Rybak, Bobby Socks and Secret Garden,

all pointless answers.

And two one-pointers for Germany, who are Lena and Nicole.

Very well done if you said any of those pointless answers at home.

Thank you very much indeed. So at the end of our second round,

the pair we have to say goodbye to, with their high score of 200,

newest members of the club, Gyasuddin and Kulsum.

I'm afraid this is the end of the road.

It's been great having you here.

Thank you so much for coming to play. Gyasuddin and Kulsum.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

Well, congratulations, Thomas and Aled, Nigel and Sue,

you're now one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at £3,000. There we are.

OK, so we've reached the head-to-head,

which means you're now allowed to play as a pair.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

Best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here is your first question.

And it concerns...

-Richard?

-We're going to show you five photos

of cast members now of TV shows that begin with the letter D,

but what are the shows, please?

OK. So let's reveal our five pictures, and here they come.

We've got...

There we go. Five television shows that begin with the letter D.

Now, Thomas and Aled, you are our low scorers, so you will go first.

We'll go for A and Desperate Housewives.

Desperate Housewives, say Thomas and Aled.

Now, Nigel and Sue, that board's all yours.

Talk us through it.

C is Downton Abbey.

E is Doc Martin.

-And D...

-Is Dallas.

So you choose which we go for now.

D, Dallas.

You're going to go for Dallas. So we have Desperate Housewives

and we have Dallas. Thomas and Aled said Desperate Housewives for A.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

22.

Good score. This is going to be very interesting.

I wonder what Dallas is going to score these days.

D, Dallas, say Nigel and Sue.

Will it beat 22?

Oh! 35 for Dallas.

It still lives on in the public consciousness.

And that means very well done, Thomas and Aled,

after one question, you are up 1-0.

Well played, gents. It's actually the best...

Of the three answers you knew,

that was the best score you could have got as well.

Cos C is Downton Abbey, a very big score, 85.

And a big score for Doc Martin as well, it's a big hit.

59 points for that.

And the best answer is B.

It's an American sitcom.

It was over here for a couple of years.

Dharma And Greg, sitting in the front there,

and that would have scored you 2 points.

-Very well done if you said that.

-Thanks very much indeed.

OK, here comes your second question and this is one you have to win,

Nigel and Sue, to stay in the game.

But you get to answer it first, so good luck with that.

Our second question is all about...

-Richard.

-Yeah, simply five clues now to facts relating to Venus.

Can you give us the most obscure answer?

OK, let's reveal our five clues and here they come.

We've got...

I'll read those again.

Nigel and Sue, what would you like to go for?

We'll go for the second one down which we think and hope is Mercury.

Mercury, say Nigel and Sue.

Mercury. Now, Thomas and Aled,

you can talk us through the board if you can.

Do you know any for certain?

-Er...

-Because otherwise, I'll go for my punt.

-Yeah.

-Go on, then.

-Have a stab in the dark.

-Top one, Aphrodisiac?

QUIET LAUGHTER

No? OK.

No, I think they were laughing

because it was such a pleasingly correct answer, Aled.

LAUGHTER

Nigel and Sue went for Mercury.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many of our 100 people

said Mercury.

33 for Mercury.

Thomas and Aled have gone for Aphrodisiac for the goddess of love.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see if it's right.

It's not quite right.

But very well done, Nigel and Sue, you're back in the game.

After two questions, it's 1-1.

Yeah, a bit early for an aphrodisiac, isn't it?

Although aphrodisiac does come from the answer which is Aphrodite.

Aphrodite would have scored you 30 points.

-The Paris museum...?

-Is the Louvre.

Louvre. Absolutely. It would have scored you 54.

-The one at the bottom, the British pop group?

-Bananarama.

Bananarama. Would have scored 19 points.

That would have been a very good answer.

The best answer on the board is the author.

You either remember it or you don't, this one.

-It's John Gray.

-John Gray.

-John Gray would have scored you 2 points.

So, again, very well done if you got that.

Thank you very much indeed. OK, here comes your third question.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final

and plays for that rather nice jackpot

so best of luck to both pairs.

Our third question is all about...

-French Cities, Richard.

-Good luck, both teams.

We're just going to show you five names of French cities now

but with alternate letters missing.

Can you tell us what the cities are, please?

OK, let's reveal our French cities with bits missing.

And here they are.

I'll read those one last time.

Thomas and Aled will go first.

We'll go for the one we know.

We'll stick with Marseille, for the bottom one.

You're going to say Marseille for the bottom one, OK.

Marseille. So, Nigel and Sue, talk us through the board.

Struggling with the top one.

The second one we think is Avignon and then Grenoble, and then Limoges.

We think we're going to go for Avignon.

-Yeah, Avignon, please for the second one.

-You're going to go for Avignon.

So, we have Marseille and we have Avignon.

Thomas and Aled went for Marseille. Let's see if that's right

and see how many of our 100 people got Marseille.

65 for Marseille.

Meanwhile, Nigel and Sue have gone for Avignon.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people got Avignon.

Well done. Avignon pips it.

-Well done!

-26 for Avignon.

Which means, Nigel and Sue, after three questions,

-you're through to the final 2-1.

-Very nicely done.

We'll fill in the scores now for the other ones that you knew.

Limoges is correct.

Limoges would have scored 44. Grenoble is also correct.

That would have scored 39. The best answer is the top one.

It's Besancon.

Besancon, and would have scored you 8 points.

-Very well done if you said that.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

Thomas and Aled.

Very strong performance all the way through the show

and we can forget all about your early exit last time

on the strength of that. But I'm afraid you didn't just manage

to carry it over the line into the final.

But it's been wonderful having you on the show.

Thanks so much. Thomas and Aled, great contestants.

APPLAUSE

But for Nigel and Sue, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Nigel and Sue,

you have seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

And at the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £3,000.

Well, I mean, people can fluke their way through to the head-to-head.

You know, that happens from time to time.

But if you make it through twice, you know you're onto something.

You are in your rightful place, it's fair to say, Nigel and Sue.

-Thank you.

-I wish you were right.

It's great to have you here. Now...

the board behind me, you know what it's like in this round.

Four rather random seeming things will come up

and they might all look impossible but there will be slightly kinder

subcategories behind each one. Today's selection reads like this.

We've got...

Oh, dear.

Great offices of state - we might have a punt.

I think the scorers we ought to have a go at, don't you?

You think so? I'll go with you.

-OK. We'll go for Top Scorers In 14/15, please.

-Top Scorers, Richard.

Very best of luck. Three different sports here.

We're looking for any of the 50 top scorers

in the English Premier League in 2014/2015, please.

We are looking for any of the 30 top scorers at the Cricket World Cup

in 2015. Or we are looking for anyone

who scored three tries or 40 points

at the Rugby World Cup in 2015, please.

So, Premier League top 50 goal-scorers,

Cricket World Cup, top 30,

and then anyone who scored three tries or 40 points

in the Rugby World Cup in 2015. Very best of luck.

Thank you very much indeed.

Now, as always, you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers

and all you need to win that jackpot

is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yes, I think we are.

-Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are, your time starts now.

I think we must have a punt on David Nugent.

-OK.

-I'm not even sure whether he's in the top 50.

-No.

-But I think he was...

We've got to give a chance with Jamie Vardy.

I don't know how many he scored last year.

-But again he's got a chance of being in the top 50.

-Yes.

-Other than that...

-What about the bloke in rugby

with the crinkly hair?

Can you be a bit more specific, do you think?

I'm really not good... I can only think of...

Tigers.

Oh, I see. Tuilagi.

-Yes.

-You think Tuilagi? Might have been, mightn't he?

Well, yeah, we weren't there very long, were we?

Yeah, let's go for him. Let's go for Manu Tuilagi.

-Well, he's a bit obscure, isn't he?

-Yeah, let's go for that one, then.

Those three? David Nugent...

-Anybody in cricket?

-..Jamie Vardy,

Manu Tuilagi. No, I've no idea about the Cricket World Cup top scorers.

Ten seconds left.

I could take a punt at one of the Indians but I wouldn't...

-No real confidence.

-Well, let's go...

OK, that is your time up. I now need your three answers.

Sounds like you've arrived at them anyway.

OK, so, the Rugby World Cup, we'll go for Manu Tuilagi.

Manu Tuilagi.

The Premier League top scorers,

we've got to give Jamie Vardy a mention.

-Jamie Vardy.

-And also David Nugent.

David Nugent. Of those three,

which is your best shot at a pointless answer, do you think?

-Well, I would think...

-The rugby one.

-OK.

-Manu Tuilagi, we'll put last.

-Yeah.

-Least likely to be pointless?

-Jamie Vardy.

-Jamie Vardy.

-Which puts David Nugent in the middle.

In the middle. OK, well, let's pop those answers up on the board

in that order, then. And here they are...

We've got Jamie Vardy, we've got David Nugent

and we've got Manu Tuilagi.

OK, well, very, very best of luck.

Now, if one of these answers were to win that jackpot for you, £3,000,

what would you do with it? Nigel, you first.

I think we just might have a hell of a Pointless party.

-Push the boat out.

-Oh, fantastic.

-Sue, how about you?

-Yeah, I think I'll have to go with that.

-We'd have to have a...

-Big Pointless party.

-Yes.

-Oh! Anyway, very, very best of luck.

As I say, your first answer was Jamie Vardy.

In this case we were looking for Premier League top goal-scorers

from the 14/15 season. This has to be pointless, obviously,

for you to win that jackpot.

Let's find out, for £3,000, how many people said Jamie Vardy.

Is it right? Is it pointless?

-No, bad luck.

-Oh.

Not a correct answer but you managed to get him mentioned.

Got Leicester into the show once again.

Which means you only have two more shots at today's jackpot.

Your next answer was David Nugent.

Again, we're looking for top goal-scorers

in the Premier League in the 14/15 season.

It has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot.

For £3,000, how many people said David Nugent?

Oh, no!

Oh, we're going for a hat-trick, I think.

I'm afraid another incorrect answer there.

So everything is now riding on your third and final answer,

which is Manu Tuilagi.

This has to be correct, then it has to be pointless

for you to win that jackpot of £3,000.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Manu Tuilagi.

Is it a pointless answer?

Oh, bad luck!

I'm afraid...

..that was a lovely clean sweep you made of that round.

A bridge too far.

Oh, I'm sorry that category didn't quite suit you there.

You didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer.

So I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £3,000.

That will roll over onto the next show.

It's been brilliant having you on both shows,

really strong performance across both of them.

Great to have you through to the final,

and great to be able to send you home with a Pointless trophy each.

Very well done indeed. Nigel and Sue.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, it's unlucky. Tuilagi didn't play at that World Cup.

You were really unlucky with Vardy and Nugent,

both of whom scored five goals,

and six goals was what you needed to be in that top 50.

There was a Leicester player, though,

who scored 11 goals in that season

who was Leonardo Ulloa.

And he was a pointless answer.

-Oh!

-I'm so sorry.

Let's start with the Premier League top scorers.

18 goals for Charlie Austin. Remember the season he had?

Danny Ings also had an amazing season.

David Silva. Papiss Demba Cisse.

You could have had Aaron Ramsey, Ander Herrera,

you could have had Gomis,

Charlie Adam, you could have had Sakho, Glenn Murray, Graziano Pelle,

Sigurdsson, Jason Puncheon, Jonathan Walters, Jordan Henderson,

Kevin Mirallas, Leroy Fer, Loic Remy.

You could have had Fellaini, Nacer Chadli, Nikica Jelavic, Oscar,

Sadio Mane, Santi Cazorla.

You could have had Stewart Downing, Steven Naismith,

lots and lots of names there. I'm so sorry.

Let's take a look at cricket now.

David Warner of Australia,

Ed Joyce who played for Ireland in that World Cup,

the leading run-scorer of all in that World Cup, Martin Guptill.

You could have had Dhawan as well.

You also could have had David Miller, Glenn Maxwell,

Coetzer, Ul-Haq,

Rohit Sharma, Sean Williams, William Porterfield of Ireland.

You could have had Virat Kohli as well.

So plenty of pointless answers there too.

And we'll move on to the rugby now.

Again, some big names here, Dan Biggar of Wales,

Greig Laidlaw of Scotland.

You could have had Milner-Skudder, Nick Easter.

Everybody apart from Carter, Savea, Farrell,

Davies, Habana and JP Pietersen,

everybody else on that list was a pointless answer.

Very well done if you got any of those at home.

And I'm so sorry that a Leicester striker

for the first time in a long time didn't win something.

Thanks very much indeed.

Nigel and Sue, great having you on the show.

Sadly, though, they didn't win today's jackpot

which means it rolls over onto the next show

when we will be playing for £4,000.

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.