Episode 19 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless.

This is the show where all the questions

have been asked of 100 people before the show,

and all our contestants have to do

is come up with the answers no-one else could think of.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one...

Hi, my name's Steve, I'm from Portsmouth,

and this is my friend Josh from Horsham.

Couple number two?

Hi, I'm Steve, this is my friend Kayvon, and we're both from Poole.

Couple number three?

Hi, I'm Stuart, this is my wife, Sally, and we're from Birmingham.

And finally, couple number four?

Hi, I'm Natasha, I'm from Surrey,

this is my work colleague Chloe, and she's from Birmingham.

And these are today's contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks very much, all of you, a warm welcome to Pointless.

We'll get to chat to each of you throughout the show as it goes along,

so that just leaves me one more person for me to introduce.

The fly in the ointment, the wrinkle in the plan,

the toenail in the paella... LAUGHTER

..it's my Pointless friend. It's Richard.

-Hiya. Hello, everybody.

-APPLAUSE

Afternoon.

-Good afternoon to you, sir.

-Good afternoon to you.

What a lovely show last time, wasn't it?

-Oh, wasn't that lovely?

-Yeah, some lovely questions,

and we welcome back two pairs from that show. Steve...

Well, Steve S, he is now. Remember when he was just Steve?

-I know, he's got letters after his name!

-Back in the old days.

..and Kayvon. Chloe and Natasha, welcome back.

Got all the way through to the head-to-head.

Now, do you remember, Steve gave us an incorrect answer when we had

pictures of people from the '80s?

-Oh, yes.

-And he gave Jeremy Beadle.

And I thought he gave Jeremy Beadle for Stephen Spielberg,

who looks a bit like Jeremy Beadle.

-Yeah.

-But he didn't, do you know who he gave Jeremy Beadle for?

-Tom Jones?

-Tom Jones.

-No!

-Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which he stupidly admitted to me just now before the show!

LAUGHTER

And I promised I wouldn't say anything.

But welcome back, both pairs, very strong pairs.

Welcome to our new pairs, as well.

Lots of lovely questions, you know,

-what else could you ask for, right?

-Perfect.

Ooh, and more excitingly still,

Simon and Rachel didn't win the jackpot last time,

which means we add another £1,000 to it,

so today's jackpot starts off at £3,750.

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

So, remember this, the pair with the highest score

at the end of each round will be eliminated.

That's all you have to remember.

No conferring till we get to the head-to-head round.

Best of luck to all four pairs. Our first category of today is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second? And whoever's going first,

please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

-Richard?

-Yeah, we're going to show

you the name of seven episode titles of sitcoms

alongside the initials of that sitcom. On each board,

you have to tell us what the sitcom is, please.

There will be 14 in all to have a go at, at home, so very best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed. So, let's reveal our episode titles.

Here's our first board of seven. And we've got...

I'm going to read those all again.

Josh, welcome to Pointless.

Good to have you here.

-What do you do, Josh?

-I work for an insurance broker.

And what are your interests, Josh?

I do a bit of caving, and I'm an Explorer leader.

-An Explorer leader?

-Yes, an Explorer Scout.

I see. How many people are in your teams when you lead them?

So, there's between six and ten kids of between 14 and 18,

depending on how many can make it that week.

Wow. And just back to the caving, Josh, where do you do your caving?

Mostly down in Somerset.

There's not many caves around West Sussex.

Have you ever explored caves that no-one's ever been in before?

I have not, yet.

Have you ever been in a cave where the tunnel has gone underwater

and you come up the other side and you're still in a tunnel?

Yes, there's a bit that we take our Scouts to, to do that bit,

and it's always kind of a challenge...

Do you put a rope under first, maybe, so that they can go...?

Yeah, there's a rope under there, yes.

But have you ever been under with no rope?

No, I haven't.

That would just be terrifying!

Now, Josh, what about our board, here,

of sitcom episode titles, I should say?

TV, not a strong point for me,

but I think The Guru Of Surbiton is The Good Life.

The Good Life, says Josh.

Let's see how many of our 100 people agree with Josh.

It's right.

Not bad, 30.

APPLAUSE

Good start to the round, Josh, well done.

-30 for The Good Life.

-Er, yeah,

it's called Good Neighbors, in America.

In virtually all of these,

they've had a go at doing these in the States.

OK, now, Kayvon.

Good to have you back. Remind us what you do, Kayvon?

-I'm a civil servant.

-You're a civil servant, based in Bournemouth?

-Yes.

-Very good indeed.

And your interests, Kayvon?

Er, I'm a trampoline gymnast.

SCATTERED LAUGHTER

Well, talk us through the disciplines of trampolining.

What different things do you have to do when you compete?

Er, you compete to routines,

one of them's meant to be the sort of easy routine,

-which has easy elements...

-Is it set to music?

No, no. No music, unfortunately.

-OK.

-And then, you've got one sort of, as you'd call it,

a difficult routine,

and your scores are totalled up.

What is the most impressive thing you can do on a trampoline?

-Um...

-What's the thing that gets a little buzz of applause?

Probably a triple front with a half twist.

Tripe front with a half twist?

-Yeah.

-Mm, sounds delicious!

-Very important bit.

LAUGHTER

Um, wow, that's extraordinary.

I mean, how much time do you spend on bouncy canvas?

That's what we call it in, um... LAUGHTER

Until recently, it was most of the day, sort of thing.

-I trained in the daytime and then coached in the evening.

-Yeah.

-But more recently...

-And where do you train?

-I mean, do you have to go to...?

-On a trampoline, I'm guessing!

-LAUGHTER

-That would be where I would do it.

Good point! Does it feel slightly oddly solid,

when you're not on a trampoline?

Yeah, I don't really know what I'm doing here.

Nor do I, to be honest! Um, what would you like to go for, Kayvon?

Um...

It's between two.

I think I'm going to go with...

..In Luton Airport, No-one Can Hear You Scream,

with One Foot In The Grave.

One Foot In The Grave, says Kayvon.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

Well, 30 is the only score we have at the moment,

and you've passed it.

Down to 19, well done, Kayvon, all going in the right direction.

APPLAUSE

-Yeah, very well played.

-Starring Richard Wilson, of course.

Thank you, Richard. Stuart, welcome.

You're from Birmingham? What keeps you busy in Birmingham, Stuart?

I work in IT, in the NHS,

for Birmingham and Solihull Mental Health Trust.

Solihull!

LAUGHTER

-Hold on a minute...

-Yeah.

-Are you a Silhillian?

-No.

Oh. He understood what I asked!

LAUGHTER

If we said Silhillian, would you know what we meant?

-Yeah.

-You see, that's so exciting.

-This is from the last show.

-We learned that from the last show,

-that people from Solihull are Silhillians.

-Yeah. It's...

So, you've missed a whole lot.

If you haven't, you must watch the box sets, because...

LAUGHTER

-There's all sorts of developing storylines you're missing.

-Yeah.

I reckon it's time we had episode titles for Pointless.

-That's a good idea, isn't it?

-The One Where...

-Yeah.

The One Where They Stumble Through Amateurishly.

LAUGHTER

-Yeah...

-The Next One Where They Stumble Through Amateurishly.

Now then, Stuart, what would you like to go for on our board?

Are you a television watcher?

I know most of the ones on this board, except for one.

But I'm going to go with, um, Menopause,

-Absolutely Fabulous.

-Absolutely Fabulous, says Stuart.

Let's see how many of our 100 people agree with Stuart.

It's right.

30 is our high, 19 is our low.

You've passed 30.

29, only just past it.

But not bad, 29 for Ab Fab.

Yeah, Idris Elba had his first-ever speaking role

-in an episode of Absolutely Fabulous.

-Isn't that great?

Yeah. I'd like to go and seek that out.

Yeah! Very good.

Thank you, Richard. Natasha, welcome back.

Great to have you - back on the same podium!

-I know!

-Tremendous deja vu, I'm getting here.

Remind us what you do, Natasha.

I'm business support for a recruitment company.

That's right, and what do you like doing in your spare time?

Going to live gigs and buying shoes.

Oh. What was the last live gig you went to?

It was actually our work colleague's band.

-Which is called?

-It's called Stickman Cartel.

Do they do covers, or are they...?

No, they write their own material,

but they have done one or two covers.

-Are they good?

-They are very good.

Yeah. There you are. I wouldn't go to a work colleague's band

if it wasn't good, I don't think.

Absolutely.

Which is why I failed to see any of your concerts last year, for your...

LAUGHTER

APPLAUSE

Ah...

Ha! I left that one open, didn't I?

Now, Natasha, this board's all yours,

if you want to talk us through it and fill in all the blanks.

OK. Well, I know two of the ones that are left.

They're going be high scores, but I think The Miracle Of Peckham is,

obviously, Only Fools and Horses.

The One After Ross Says Rachel is going to be Friends.

I'd maybe take a guess at The Passion of Saint Tibulus

maybe being Fawlty Towers.

But I think I'm going to...

..play it safe

and go for The One After Ross Says Rachel is Friends.

OK. Well, let's see how safe that is, Natasha.

Friends, let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

Oh, no... It's not bad. 77.

APPLAUSE

77 for Friends.

James Burrows, the famous American sitcom producer and director,

directed several episodes of that.

He took the whole cast to Vegas before the series began,

cos he had a gut feeling about it, and he just said,

"This is the last time you'll have any anonymity in your life."

He said, "So enjoy yourselves."

He was right, wasn't he? Very impressive.

-Wow.

-Now, The Miracle Of Peckham, of course, is Only Fools and Horses.

Surprisingly low score, actually.

We'll go down to The Passion of Saint Tibulus.

It's not Fawlty Towers.

-Father Ted.

-Father Ted, yeah.

The best answer on the board is an unbelievably low score.

-Peep Show.

-Peep Show, yeah.

-So very well done if you said that.

-Thank you very much, Richard.

Well, we're halfway through the round. Let's take a quick look

at those scores. 19 is the best score of that pass,

so very well done, Kayvon. Up to 29, where we find Stuart and Sally.

30 is where we find Josh and Steve H.

And then Natasha and Chloe, 77.

You're a long way ahead. Chloe...

How did you find that board, Chloe?

-It was OK.

-Do you think you'll be able to find

a nice low-scoring answer on the next board,

-I mean, just in this category?

-I don't... I hope so.

-Well, so do I.

-I don't know.

-We need one.

-Yes.

-Best of luck with that.

We're going to come back down the line now. Can the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, let's put seven more episode titles from sitcoms up on the board,

and here they are.

I'll read those again.

Chloe, is that board any better?

The first one was better.

Oh, right, OK.

-Yeah.

-Now, Chloe, remind us what you do.

I also work in recruitment, with Natasha.

-We work together.

-And your interests, when not working?

I like to keep fit,

so I've done a couple of half marathons.

Only half marathons? I mean,

that makes them sound sort of faintly doable.

-It's still a long way.

-It is a long way, yeah.

-13 miles.

-Yeah, yeah.

-They're quite hard.

-Yeah.

-Have you done one this year?

-No, I'm doing one in October.

-OK, right, so getting ready for that.

-I need to start training.

-Yes.

I'd say you probably do. Do you follow the app?

-You get an app, don't you?

-No, I don't know, I just kind of run,

and just see what happens.

Fine. And last time, that was fine?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Fine, good.

Good. Now, Chloe, you're on 77, you're our high-scorers.

-We need a low score from you.

-Um...

Yeah, the only one that I know...

..is...

Yeah, Basil The Rat,

which is Fawlty Towers.

Fawlty Towers, says Chloe.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Fawlty Towers.

It's right.

Well, that's not bad.

133 is your total.

Yeah, the anagrams they used to have on the Fawlty Towers sign

at the start of each show were all made up by a production assistant

on the show called Iain McLean, who was a crossword addict.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now then, Sally.

How lovely to have you here, Sally,

and that's the most exciting hair we've had this series.

-Thanks very much!

-Very good.

Sally, what do you do?

I'm a primary school teacher.

Lovely. How long have you done that for?

12 years now.

Goodness me. You just teach everything, I suppose, don't you?

You have to do a bit of everything, be a jack of all trades.

Perfect grounding for Pointless, I always like to think.

And when the holidays come, what do you love to do?

-Sleep.

-Oh.

-Sleep!

Oh, that's nice. What time are you normally up on a working day?

On a working day, it's about six o'clock, but on a holiday, 11.

Perfect. Sally, great news, you're through to Round Two.

-It doesn't matter what you score here.

-OK.

-What would you like to go for?

-I think I know all of them,

I just want to choose the most obscure,

so I'm going to go for Open Government,

and Yes Minister.

Yes Minister, says Sally. Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

No red line, cos you're already through.

It is Yes Minister, and I have a feeling this will be...

APPLAUSE

73 is your total, not bad.

Well played, Sally. It's the title of the first-ever episode of that,

as well. Theresa May chose an extract from Yes Minister

when she went on Desert Island Discs.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Steve.

Steve S, to give you your full name these days.

Also through to the next round, by the way.

Steve S, we discovered last time you're a civil servant,

and an ex-trampoline...?

Ex-gymnast.

-An ex-trampoline gymnast, shall we say.

-That's right.

-Well, why did you give it up?

-I was just getting too tired.

I think my body was failing me!

And how many hours a day were you on the...

..on the bouncy canvas?

So not as many as Kayvon, but I probably was doing about 12,

15 hours a week at my peak.

Right. Well, maybe you should have done more hours.

There's your answer. Not as many as Kayvon!

What else do you like getting up to, Steve?

Now that I've retired from trampolining, I'm now a judge.

So some of the competitions that Kayvon and others are competing at.

I was suddenly picturing you as a High Court judge!

No, I see. LAUGHTER

Or just... Maybe just a circuit judge.

Yeah, that's where they pick

-a lot of their people from, don't they?

-Yeah!

It is, isn't it? But you go round, judging things?

And you hold up scores?

-I hold up the scores, that's right.

-It's like Strictly, bouncy Strictly!

LAUGHTER Brilliant.

Now, Steve, as I say, you're already through to the next round.

What would you like to go for?

Well, unfortunately, I don't know a lot...well, if any on the board.

The only one I did know was the Fawlty Towers

and the Yes Minister one.

So I'm going to have to take a guess at Bambi.

I'm not sure if it is a series,

but The Young Ones?

The Young Ones, says Steve.

OK, well, no red line, you're already through,

but let's see how far down the column we get with The Young Ones.

It's right.

Very good indeed, strong performance on that second podium there.

Yeah, that's the classic University Challenge episode,

with Footlights College against Scumbag College,

and Griff Rhys Jones playing Bamber Gascoigne.

-Which he does very well.

-It's a slight knife to the heart,

hearing someone who's 27 say,

"I don't know if that was a series, The Young Ones?"

You think, "Oh... That's only my entire childhood, that's all!"

Steve, welcome.

-Hello.

-Great to have you here.

-What do you do, Steve?

-I'm a corporate insurance broker.

I see. And what thrills you when not broking?

-Or maybe that thrills you?

-It does.

That's nice! What else thrills you?

Well, I like to play hockey,

and support Portsmouth Football Club,

-follow them around.

-Very good...

Follow them, follow them around!

They're going, "Go away!" LAUGHTER

Steve, there you are on 30, it doesn't matter what you score,

you'll be through to the next round, even if you score 100,

but I'm sure you won't. Do you feel like talking us through this board

and filling in all those blanks?

Yeah, I think I can name three of them.

The third one down, is... I can't think of anything for that one.

But I think I'm going to go for Appraisals being The Office.

The Office, says Steve. No red line, you're already through,

but let's see how many of our 100 people said The Office.

It's right.

Look at that, 19!

APPLAUSE

Joint lowest score of the whole round,

so very well done indeed there, Steve H.

That takes your total up to 49.

That's great work, Steve. Yeah, Steve Carell, who is the boss

in the American version of The Office, which is brilliant,

said he only watched five minutes of the British Office,

cos he felt, if he watched any more,

he'd end up doing an impression of Ricky Gervais. He didn't want to,

he wanted to bring his own skills to the job, which he does, brilliantly.

Now, I bet you can name all of these.

Who's That Dancing with Nora Batty, then?

-Last of the Summer Wine.

-Yeah, a lot of clues there.

Is That Your Horse Outside?

-Steptoe And Son.

-Steptoe And Son, yeah.

And the best answer on the board, Will Is Home Alone.

-The...

-I can't...

I know, it took me a while.

-But you'll know it, very well. It's The Inbetweeners.

-Oh, of course.

TI, it's very confusing.

TO and TI are both weirdly difficult initials.

Aren't they? Well, thank you very much,

we are at the end of our first round.

And I'm so sorry, I can't bear it, Chloe and Natasha,

we have to say goodbye to you.

Oh... Low-scorers,

-head-to-headers last time.

-I know.

It's been lovely having you here, I'm sorry,

it's far too soon to be sending you home, but Chloe and Natasha, wonderful.

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

And so suddenly we're down to three pairs,

and at the end of this round,

obviously, we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

Well, Kayvon, lowest individual score with Steve H.

Joint low-scorers there, with 19,

and Steve S and Kayvon are lowest combined scores there,

so very well done.

Best of luck to all three pairs for our next round.

Our category for Round Two today is Words.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could. B---E. Richard.

Yeah, looking for any five-letter word in the English language,

in the English world language section of oxforddictionaries.com,

please, that fits the pattern B---E.

As always, no hyphenated words and no proper nouns.

Best of luck. Have a little think about what you're going to say...

Mm-hm.

Steve, always tough going first.

Yeah, I've got one.

-You've got one?

-I have got one.

-You've got one?

I'm going to go with brine.

I know him!

Let's see, brine. How many of our 100 people said brine?

23 for brine, not bad.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, water with lots of salt in it.

Thank you very much, Richard. Now, Steve S.

What would you like to go for?

OK, I think I'm going to go with the word baste.

OK. Baste, says Steve.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said baste.

It's right. 23 is the only score we have at the moment.

Baste passes that, down to 13, very well done indeed.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, to pour fat or juices over meat during cooking.

The turkey I had at Christmas was BASTE on a true story.

Thank you, Richard. Sally.

I'm going to go for brute.

Brute, says Sally.

Let's see how many of our 100 people liked brute.

It's right.

3 for brute. Well played, Sally. APPLAUSE

Well played again, Sally.

Yes, savagely violent man or animal, a brute.

Thank you very much, Richard.

So we are halfway through the round, let's take a look at those scores.

3 the best score of that pass - well done, Sally. Sally and Stuart,

I think you might be in the head-to-head on that basis.

13 is where we find Steve and Kayvon.

23 is where we find Steve and Josh.

So, Josh,

a lovely low score from you is what we need.

Good luck with that. We're going to come back down the line now -

can the second players please step up to the podium?

So, then, Stuart.

It's five-letter words beginning with B, ending with E.

19 or less at this stage guarantees you a place in the head-to-head.

Lovely score from Sally, there, with brute.

OK. I'm going to go with bathe.

You're going to go with bathe.

Let's see, here is your red line.

If you can get below that red line,

you're straight through to the head-to-head.

How many people said bathe?

It's right.

Look at that, through you go! 8!

APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed. 11.

Well played. Don't bathe in brine.

That's my motto.

Best place to bathe!

-What, in brine?

-Bit of saltwater, yeah.

-No.

-I'm interested, by the way, that baste,

which I thought was a very good, lovely answer,

our 100 were all over that.

-Yeah.

-Baste and brine...

-Loved it.

-Brute?

-They weren't finding it.

-What does that tell us?

That tells us they like cooking, and swimming...

..which is nice. I think it's a very fair reflection on them.

That is what it is.

-OK, thank you.

-Have you got an answer, by the way?

-Oh, have I?!

-Have you?

-Yes, I have.

-Good, because I've written one down.

-Oh, good, good, good.

Now, Kayvon.

Kayvon, the high-scorers

are still Josh and Steve H on 23,

so 9 or less is what you should be aiming for.

Um...I think I'm going to go with blade.

Blade, says Kayvon.

Here is your red line. If you can get below that red line with blade,

you are through to the head-to-head. How many people said blade?

It's right.

20 for blade. APPLAUSE

Takes your total up to 33.

-It's exciting.

-See, they're obviously thinking

blade as in cooking, not blade as in brute.

-That's why it scored so many.

-I see. OK.

Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Josh.

You have to score 9 or less,

or we say goodbye.

Blame.

OK, blame, says Josh.

Here is your red line.

Let's see how far down the column we get with blame.

Will it keep you in the game?

25 for blame. APPLAUSE

48 is your total.

That's a very awkward word to get knocked out on, I'm afraid!

Blame. Um...

-Now, what's your word?

-Mine is breve.

-Breve?

-Musical. Breve, B-R-E-V-E.

Oh, I should have thought you'd say breve!

I might have known you'd say...

-I didn't know you'd say breve. 4 points for breve.

-Ah.

A very nice answer. I thought you were going to say...

I bet that was lower-scoring than breve.

It was a pointless answer, yeah.

-Oh! Thank you.

-That's OK.

-Yeah.

It's not the first time I've overestimated you!

-No.

-Is it? Breve is a lovely answer, though.

-Yeah, you know.

No, I think it's a nice answer.

Now, shall we take a look at some pointless answers?

I think you'll enjoy that.

Barre, as in you would have in ballet dancing.

-To belie.

-Mm.

-Belie is a pointless answer.

Bikie, that's a sort of Australia and New Zealand thing

for motorcyclists.

Biome, which is a lot of flora and fauna.

Bocce, which is an Italian game.

Bodge - to bodge.

Boite, that's a small restaurant or nightclub.

Bowie. It'd be nice, wouldn't it, if you got that?

Brume, as well,

which is if you don't know how to spell broom properly.

Very well done if you got any of those.

Let's take a look at the top three,

the ones that most of our 100 people said.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. So at the end of our second round,

the pair we have to say goodbye to, with their high score of 48...

I'm afraid, Josh and Steve H, it is you -

but you'll be back next time,

so you'll have another chance to have a run at the Pointless final.

Good luck with that, I'm sure you'll go much further then.

In the meantime, thanks very much, Josh and Steve.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining two pairs, it's now time for the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Steve and Kayvon, Sally and Stuart.

You are now one step closer to the final,

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at £3,750.

But the great news is we have arrived at the head-to-head,

and that means you can play as a team -

you can chat before you give your answers -

and the first pair to win two questions

will be playing for that jackpot.

So we have our Brummies versus our Jumpers.

This is perfect. Neither of you have been here before,

but we've had some good answers.

Lovely low score from you, Sally, in that last round.

So I think this ought to be close.

Best of luck to both pairs, let's play the head-to-head.

Here is your first question, and it concerns...

-Richard.

-Yeah, we're going to show you five pairs

of professional snooker players now, who share a surname.

We just need that surname, please.

-Best of luck.

-OK, let's reveal our five pairs of snooker players,

and here they come.

There you go. Five sets of snooker players who all share a name.

Now, Steve and Kayvon, you're our low-scorers, so you will go first.

Can you think of any?

No.

My guess would be A, and it would be White.

Is that all we need to say, the surname?

-Yeah.

-It's as good a guess as I've got.

-OK.

We're going to go for A, White.

A, White.

A, White, say Steve and Kayvon.

Now, Sally and Stuart.

Do you want to talk us through the board?

No, snooker's not our strong point!

Um...

I was going to say A, as well, but Taylor.

OK, so you'd like to say Taylor.

We have White and we have Taylor.

Now only one of you can be right.

Let's find out which one it's going to be.

Steve and Kayvon said White for A.

Let's see if it's right,

let's see how many of our 100 people said White.

-Surprised?

-Doesn't necessarily mean Sally and Stuart are right,

but let's find out.

Taylor, say Sally and Stuart.

Ah, and they are right. Look at that.

36. APPLAUSE

Well done, Sally and Stuart.

That means, after one question, you are up 1-0.

Yeah, that's Dennis Taylor, of course, the world champion,

and David Taylor, the Silver Fox.

B is the biggest scorer by some way.

-Higgins.

-Yes, Alex and John Higgins.

Would have scored you 62.

-C. Neil Robertson...

-Exactly.

..and that's Jimmy Robertson next to him, so Robertson.

Would have scored you 8.

I've bagged myself a pointless answer with this other one,

and that is way back from the glory days of kind of early '80s snooker -

the Welshman Cliff Wilson

and one of the future stars of snooker, Kyren Wilson.

So, Wilson - well done if you said that,

I know snooker fans will have done.

-Pointless answer.

-Look at Cliff Wilson, what a dude.

-Yeah.

-That's when snooker was snooker.

-Look at that.

And E is Kirk and Matthew Stevens -

and that would've scored you 11 points.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So here comes the second question -

Steve and Kayvon, you have to win this one to stay in the game,

but Sally and Stuart will be answering it first,

so good luck with that.

Our second question today is all about the Eiffel Tower. Richard.

We're going to show you five clues now to facts about the Eiffel Tower.

Can you give us the most obscure answer?

OK, let's reveal our five Eiffel facts, and here they come.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

-Sally and Stuart will go first.

-OK.

We only know two, so we're going to go for the last one,

about the...the prison that was stormed,

-and we think that's the Bastille.

-Bastille, say Sally and Stuart.

Now, then, Steve and Kayvon.

Do you fancy talking us through that board?

Not really. Um...

We know that the city is Paris,

we thought that the prison would be the Bastille,

but what did you want to...?

You can talk out loud -

you can do all your reasoning out loud, if you like.

We were thinking of...

We were thinking of guessing the first name of the engineer.

THEY WHISPER

We're going to go with Paris as the city.

OK.

OK. So, we have Bastille and we have...

Sorry, I've forgotten what it's called, remind me.

Paris. Sally and Stuart have gone for Bastille.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Bastille.

49 for Bastille. APPLAUSE

Steve and Kayvon taking a bit of a punt here,

saying the city of Paris.

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many of our 100 people got that.

Well, yes.

That was better than I thought it was going to be!

APPLAUSE 88 is what Paris scores -

and it means, after only two questions,

Sally and Stuart are straight through to the final.

Were you going to have a guess at the first name of the...?

We were. You were going to say?

I was going to say Pierre.

I'm not sure if the timelines are right,

but I was going to say Isambard, as in Isambard Kingdom Brunel.

-I don't know if that's...

-Paris was a good answer, it's fine!

Ah, Lordy Lord.

They both work in the same place, they both trampoline...

..their knowledge of the Eiffel Tower,

I'm going to put it in the woeful category,

that's where I'm going to put it. The, er - do know the top one?

I'm going to - is it Les Invalides, is it?

It's not, it's not, it's a place...

We've all been there, that's the thing.

you know when you have to get off at a certain Tube station

and all that kind of stuff, and then it just drifts out of my head.

It's the Champ de Mars.

Would have scored you 5 points.

Now, if you had to guess the decade, it's a tricky one,

those decades ones are always slightly difficult.

Now what would you say for the decade?

Well it's... It's got to be 19th century.

Um, 1890s.

Ooh! 1880s.

Yeah. Very well played. Would have scored you 11 points.

And the first name, not Pierre, not Isambard.

It's not even a French name.

No, I... He's Gustave.

Gustave is exactly the name, yes -

and Gustave would've scored 8 points.

So the best answer on the board is Champ de Mars.

-Well done if you said that.

-Thank you very much indeed.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round...

Steve and Kayvon, I'm so sorry.

The wheels came off slightly in that round,

but it's been great having you on.

Two great shows you've been in,

and I'm sorry we have to say goodbye now,

but thank you so much for playing. Steve and Kayvon, fantastic.

APPLAUSE

But for Sally and Stuart, it is now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations Sally and Stuart,

you've fought off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

-Yes!

-You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £3,750.

Well, this is nice.

Sally, this is good, because it means you can, you know,

you can get a train back up north, get a nice early night

and lie in tomorrow. Oh! Fantastic.

How nice, your class will all be watching.

-Yes.

-Well they will be now.

-They will be.

-You can tell them.

-Yep.

-They're going to be so proud.

You're not going to be allowed to show them your trophy, presumably,

-until after this has gone out.

-Of course.

-Have to keep it under lock and key.

-I will.

Well, Stuart, you've got to win this jackpot, by the way.

It can't just sit there getting bigger.

What would you like to see come up, what's going to help you win it?

Er, I would like films, actors,

music of certain eras, classic rock music maybe.

-Sally, anything you want to add to that?

-Same -

just movies, films, TV shows.

-No sport.

-No sport.

-Right, well, very, very best of luck.

Let's see what today's selection looks like. We've got...

OK for Alternative Bands?

And then it's your fault.

-I...

-LAUGHTER

-Yes, I think we'll have to go for Alternative Bands.

-Yeah.

Alternative Bands it is.

OK, very, very best of luck.

We are looking for any UK top 40 hit studio album

by any of the following bands, please, up to February 2016.

So...

So no greatest hits, live albums, anything like that.

Just studio albums released by any of those three bands

that were UK top 40 hits according to the officialcharts.com.

-Very best of luck.

-Thank you very much.

Now, as always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers,

and all you need to win that jackpot

is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Yes.

-OK.

Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are, your time starts now.

-I think we've picked the wrong subject.

-Yes. OK...

I don't know...

Shall we pick a song where an album might be named after a song?

I was thinking of a band name,

-could be an album name for some of them, maybe.

-Yeah.

-So we could say The Cure...

-The Cure...

No self-titled albums, guys.

-No self-titled, OK.

-OK.

-Boys Don't Cry?

-Boys Don't Cry, yeah...

Um...

Any other songs by Siouxsie And The Banshees?

The Cure? Friday I'm In Love?

Friday I'm In Love, yes, let's go for that.

And...anything by Siouxsie And The Banshees?

-Any songs?

-I don't know.

-No? Anything by Talking Heads?

Jen's going to kill me!

Um...

Anything by Talking Heads that you know?

We'll make one up.

-OK.

-Ten seconds left.

Friday I'm In Love and...

-You invent something.

-I don't...

-Make one up.

OK, that is your minute up. I'm so sorry.

That minute's... Sometimes those minutes aren't too long.

I think that minute was 60 seconds too long for you, wasn't it.

-It was.

-That was tough.

It's tough, we don't know...

Let's have - well, it's quite funny,

you can make up some album titles if you want to do.

What are you going to go for?

With The Cure, we're going to go for a couple of their songs

and hope there was an album the same.

So, Boys Don't Cry.

-Boys Don't Cry.

-Friday I'm In Love.

Friday I'm In Love.

And then for Talking Heads, we're going to say...

This...is completely your invention.

Smash.

Smash. OK. Now, of those three,

which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

Um, Boys Don't Cry?

Boys Don't Cry goes last. Least likely to be pointless?

-Smash.

-Smash.

-Smash.

And then we've got Friday I'm In Love in the middle.

OK. Well, let's put those answers up in that order,

and here they are. We've got...

Well, three brave answers, let's say, there -

and two of them, at least, could be right.

And they could end up being pointless.

If you would win that jackpot of £3,750,

what would you like to do with it? Sally, you first.

Ooh. We've got our wedding reception coming up.

We eloped on Valentine's Day, so now we owe everyone a party.

-Lovely.

-So it would go towards maybe an Elvis impersonator

or a band to come and play

because we were married by an Elvis impersonator in Las Vegas.

Fantastic.

Well, congratulations.

Are you absolutely certain it was an impersonator?

Well!

He was pretty old, he could have been,

he could have been the real one.

OK. So, a big party is what you need.

Stuart, anything you want to add to that?

It's the same, or put it towards a classic Volkswagen camper van.

OK. Well, best of luck. Three answers, as I say, on the board.

Let's see if any of those -

well, let's see if any of them are right, to start with.

Smash was your first answer.

In this case, we were looking for albums by Talking Heads.

If it is right and if it is pointless, it will win you £3,750 -

but let's see how many people said it. Is it right?

It's not right.

Sadly.

So we move quickly on to your next answer, Friday I'm In Love.

In this case we were looking for albums by The Cure.

Again, if it's pointless, it will win you £3,750.

How many people said Friday I'm In Love?

Bad luck. Another incorrect answer.

So we turn to your third and final answer, Boys Don't Cry,

another Cure song -

you're hoping this might be the name of an album

that nobody else could remember.

If it's pointless it wins you £3,750.

How many people said Boys Don't Cry?

Oh, bad luck.

Bad luck. Well, that was a game effort, I have to say.

It could have gone much better, that round,

had it been some bands you knew.

It's always like that in this last round, though,

but really strong performance throughout the show.

Very good indeed.

You get a Pointless trophy to take home, each, as well,

and you did it all in one show -

which is a stealth raid, you might say.

So very, very well done. Sally and Stuart.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, you chose exactly the right tactic, as well,

to go for the names of Cure songs.

Boys Don't Cry was an album, actually, but not a hit album -

it was number 71, something like that, Boys Don't Cry -

but exactly the right tactics.

Let's take a look, now, at the pointless answers,

cos I know some people at home will have done well on this

if you like any of these bands. The Cure...

So, they were the only four pointless answers,

so well done if you got one of those.

Talking Heads, there's only two pointless answers here...

And Siouxsie And The Banshees.

Let's take a look.

Also could have had Peepshow, Superstition and The Rapture.

They were all pointless.

Very, very well done if you got any of those at home.

Thanks very much, Richard. And thanks very much, Sally and Stuart.

Sadly, they didn't win our jackpot today,

which means it rolls over onto the next show,

when we will be playing for £4,750.

Join us then, see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

..and it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.