Episode 41 Pointless

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong,

and a very warm welcome to Pointless,

the game where you are always aiming for the lowest score.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hello. I'm Kathie from Lincoln,

and this is my colleague and friend Vijay from Peterborough.

-Couple number two.

-Hi.

I'm Darren, and this is my wife, Helen, and we're from the Wirral.

-Couple number three.

-Hi, I'm Donna.

This is my husband, John, and we're from Leven, in Fife.

And finally, couple number four.

Hi, I'm Tash, this is my dad Greg, and we've come from Crouch End.

And these are today's contestants. APPLAUSE

Thanks very much, all of you.

A very warm welcome to Pointless. We'll get a chance to chat to you

throughout the show as it goes along.

So, that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

too clever for his own good... Seriously, carrying that

massive cranium around has given him a bad back.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard!

Hiya. Hey, everybody.

Hiya. Hello, sir.

-Hello, sir.

-Welcome.

-I know, yes, yes.

I never say welcome. Because it's your show.

-Normally, you ask me how I am, and just as I draw...

-How are you?

I'm very well. And then I draw breath and say, "How are you?"

And you are on, you're on.

-I'm so well.

-Oh, good.

-Very, very well.

I'm looking forward to today's show.

Only Helen and Darren are back from the last show,

and they got knocked out in Round One which, at the time,

they would have thought was terrible,

but you weren't here for Round Two about the Conservative Cabinets,

one of the worst rounds we've ever had.

It was, honestly, it was carnage.

So, you did well to be knocked out when you were, I promise you.

And to come back here now, now the dust has cleared.

-Yes.

-Three new pairs as well.

Six new people. Only one of whom has chosen to wear a tie.

Thank you, John, for bringing a little bit of class to proceedings!

That's nice. The jackpot's gone up a little bit, hasn't it?

-It has, yeah.

-Of course, last time, Vaughn and Eni,

they got a one-pointer on their last question. Oh!

There we are. They didn't win the jackpot last time.

So we add another £1,000 to that jackpot.

Which means today's jackpot starts off at, look at that, £4,250.

Very exciting. APPLAUSE

Someone could be walking away with that.

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

So, remember this. The pair with the highest score

at the end of each round will be eliminated.

No conferring, of course, till we get to the head-to-head round.

But best of luck to all four pairs. Our first category today is...

Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

-Books In Books, Richard.

-Books In Books.

On each board, we're going to show you the titles of

seven fictional books and the books in which they were written about.

We just need you to tell us the author, please.

We've also given you their initials. So, seven authors on the first board

to guess, seven authors on the second board, 14 in all.

-Good luck, everyone.

-Thank you very much indeed.

So, here is our first board of seven Books In Books.

I'm going to read those all again.

Kathie. A warm welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

-Very good to have you with us. What do you do, Kathie?

I'm a manager with a global software firm.

I see, and Vijay works alongside you, does he?

He does, he works for one of my teams.

Very good indeed. Now, what are your interests, Kathie?

Um, music, mainly music.

-Crafting.

-Tell me about the crafting,

-what crafting are you doing?

-Well, these days, it's mainly card-making.

My hands don't work so well for sewing any more.

-But I used to do quite a lot of sewing.

-OK. So, card-making.

Christmas cards and birthday cards, things like that?

-Yeah, greeting cards, yeah.

-Very nice. Very nice indeed, Kathie.

Now, what would you like to go for on our board?

Um, well, there's a few that I actually think I know.

Um, I've got to go for my favourite author,

Who Is This God Person Anyway? Douglas Adams.

Douglas Adams, says Kathie. Let's see how many of our 100 people

have got Douglas Adams.

32 for Douglas Adams, not bad at all. A good start to the show.

Yeah, it was the third in a trilogy of philosophical blockbusters.

There was Where God Went Wrong,

Some More Of God's Greatest Mistakes,

and Who Is This God Person Anyway?

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Helen, welcome back to Pointless.

-Remind us what you do, Helen?

-I am a university administrator.

-In the psychology department?

-Yes, that's right, yes.

At Liverpool University.

Um, and what are your interests when not doing that, Helen?

Er, I enjoy playing poker.

And I also present a radio show on a local radio station.

-What time of day is your show?

-It's a weekend breakfast show.

-That's live?

-It is live, yeah, it is.

So, it's two early getty-uppies, yeah.

-What time are you on?

-7am through to 10am, both days.

That's a long show.

Excellent. Now, Helen, what would you like to go for on this board?

It's, er, it's not the greatest round for me, unfortunately.

Um, so, I'm going to go for the top one and say JK Rowling.

JK Rowling, says Helen, for the top one,

let's see how many of our 100 people agree with Helen?

It is JK Rowling.

72 is your score.

Yeah, continually referenced by Hermione Granger

throughout the series, The History Of Hogwarts.

Thanks very much, Richard.

John, a warm welcome to Pointless.

Thank you for the tie. Look at that.

John, what do you do?

I'm a civil engineer, and I work for the local authority's

in-house contractor in Perthshire.

Very good indeed. And what do you like getting up to

-when you're not doing that?

-Ooh, well, I like to play golf,

but I don't have a lot of time to play golf.

And I like to fish, but I don't have much time to fish.

I like foraging for wild mushrooms, which you only need to find time for

-in the autumn, so that's not too bad.

-I see.

Do you have a favourite mushroom that you go for?

Well, the most commonly found and the best eating ones

-are the chanterelle up where we are, so.

-Very good.

Now, John, what would you like to go for?

Er, well, there are a few.

I'm fairly certain that Sex Is My Adventure

from The Day Of The Triffids is John Wyndham.

John Wyndham, says John.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said John Wyndham.

It's right. Now, 32 is our lowest score at this point.

And you pass it, down you go at 18.

18 for John Wyndham.

Very well done indeed, John.

Yeah, one of the novel's protagonists, Josella Playton,

is a fictional author. Very good answer.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Now, then, Greg, welcome. Good to have you here.

What do you do, Greg?

I work in advertising, I'm a freelance copywriter,

-creative director.

-That's quite fun.

-Occasionally.

-Occasionally.

-It can be.

Mostly, I just sit in the corner at the computer

while somebody else does the presentation.

I know, but copywriting... So many great writers have also been

copyrighters in advertising.

-I don't think that's going to happen here!

-Really? Well, you never know.

-But it's a nice outlet for interesting ideas.

-It is, yeah.

Always keeping things on the boil.

You must get to meet some interesting people?

Oh, indeed, yeah, it's a lot of fun.

-Curious projects put before you.

-Absolutely.

And what are your interests outside advertising?

Musical, I play the bass guitar in a pub band.

Excellent. What's the pub band called?

It's called The Raptors.

Oh, I like that. The Raptors. This is good. Good stuff.

Now, Greg, what would you like to go for on this board?

Um, JRR Tolkien was The Hobbit.

Joseph Conrad was Heart Of Darkness,

and I think it's Ayn Rand is Atlas Shrugged.

But I'm not 100% sure on that.

So, um, Joseph Conrad for An Inquiry Into Some Points Of Seamanship.

Joseph Conrad, says Greg.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Joseph Conrad?

Absolutely right, Joseph Conrad.

Not bad at all, down to 8, best score of the round so far, Greg,

very well done. Eight for Joseph Conrad.

Very well played, Greg.

You're right about Ayn Rand as well,

that would have been an even better score.

But 8 is not bad, so we can't really complain.

Ayn Rand would have scored you 3 points.

Tolkien you're also right about, at the bottom there,

There And Back Again would have scored you 39.

And The Pacific Journal of Adam Ewing.

-Brilliant, David Mitchell.

-David Mitchell, not that one,

would have scored you 4 points. They are both brilliant.

Both brilliant. Thank you, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores.

8 to Greg, the best score of the pass.

Very well done indeed. Greg and Natasha.

18 is where John and Donna are.

32, Kathie and Vijay.

And then Helen and Darren, 72, this is a high score.

Darren, you know what you have to do. Good luck with that.

We're going back down the line now.

Can the second players step up to the podium?

Let's put seven more Books Within Books up on the board,

and here they are. We have got...

I'm going to read those again.

Natasha, welcome to Pointless, good to have you here.

-From London?

-Yeah, that's right.

And what do you do, Natasha?

I'm a student at King's College, London.

-And what are you studying?

-Liberal Arts.

-And what year are you in?

-I've just finished my first year,

about to go into my second.

Oh, exciting. And what are your interests, Natasha?

I like playing music as well.

I collect a few instruments.

I like watching football, watching TV, the usual.

What instruments are in your collection?

Well, I've got a Chinese flute, a Slovakian flute, a banjo.

-They're the interesting ones.

-Do you play all these?

-A bit, yeah.

That's good. What's the difference between

a Slovakian and Chinese flute?

Oh, the Chinese one, there's a pulley thing

and, the Slovakian one's a bit like a recorder.

How amazing. What? So, you pull the Chinese one.

-Do you play like that?

-Yeah, longways.

-Wow.

-Like a swannee whistle almost?

-Yes, sort of.

There you are. Now, Natasha, you're on 8,

our high-scorers at the moment are Darren and Helen on 72,

which means 63 or less is your target.

Um, I'm going to go with the bottom one, John Green.

John Green, The Fault In Our Stars.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said John Green.

There's your red line, Natasha. Get below that, you're into Round Two.

It's right.

And you are through. John Green seeing you very comfortably

to the next round, Natasha.

8, you are equalling Greg's score there.

Fabulous work on the far podium, taking your total up to 16.

Yeah, well played there. The fictional author Peter Van Houten,

played by Willem Dafoe in the movie.

Very good indeed, thank you, Richard.

Now, then, Donna, welcome.

-Hello.

-Great to have you here, Donna, what do you do?

Well, I am a singer and actress, and when I'm not doing that,

I work in a lovely wee theatre

in St Andrew's in Fife, in the box office.

-In the box office?

-Yes.

Very nice. Peering through a little hole, selling tickets.

Do you have one of those exciting tickets thing that feeds tickets

-out of the surface?

-It's called a Boca machine.

-A Boca machine?

-It comes out at the side of me.

-Oh, that's exciting.

-Isn't it?

-That is exciting.

There you are. Donna, what would you like to go for? You're on 18.

Again, 53 or less keeps you comfortably in the game.

OK. There are only a couple on there that I am sure of.

Out of the two, I think I'm going to go with the top one,

-and that's George RR Martin.

-George RR Martin, says Donna.

Here is your red line.

If you can get below that with George RR Martin,

you are through to the next round. How many people said it?

It's right. And you're through.

12. Very well done indeed. Taking your total up to

a very neat 30.

Yes. An historical document listing all the members of the important

-families, of which there are many.

-Mm-hm! Aren't there, though?

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now, then, Darren.

Darren, welcome back. Remind us what you do?

I'm a sales coordinator in a shipping line.

In a shipping line based in Liverpool?

-Yep.

-And your interests when not directing shipping?

Um, I recently got into running,

so that takes up quite a bit of my time when I can get out.

-Well, run a bit faster!

-Well, yeah, I'm getting there!

There we are. Darren, you have a mountain to climb here.

Essentially, we're looking for a negative score from you...

-Yeah.

-..is what we're after there.

How are you feeling about the board? Do you think there's something

-there that will be a suitably low score for you?

-I'm going to have

to take a punt. Because I had the bottom and top one.

So, I'll say Brideshead Revisited, and I'll say Evelyn Waugh.

Evelyn Waugh is the punt you are going to take.

There's no red line for you as you are the high-scorers.

Let's see how far down the column we get with Evelyn Waugh.

20 for Evelyn Waugh, not bad at all.

Surprisingly low score there, taking the total up to 92, not bad.

Yeah, by the book's protagonist, Charles Ryder.

Yeah, thank you, Richard.

Vijay, welcome to Pointless, good to have you here.

-What do you do, Vijay?

-I'm a software programmer

for one of Kathie's teams.

Is she a good person to work for?

-Oh, the best.

-Excellent.

Now, Vijay, what are your interests?

Um, mainly community.

I'm a member of a number of community groups

within my local area.

Promote different various projects.

Good for you. Things like what?

The parish council, are these the sort of things you do?

Yes, I am. I've been on the parish council for seven years,

I was the chair for five of them.

So, I helped set it up, so that's quite good.

I've set up a number of groups within.

So, your parish was council-less until you came along?

-Yes!

-You said, we need a council.

-We did.

-Well done, you. Fantastic.

Now, there you are, you're on 32.

I think you should be able to see yourselves into the next round.

59 is your target.

-Do you want to talk us through the board?

-I wish I could.

I'm going to have to have a punt on the third one down,

Nymphs And Their Ways,

from The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe.

Is it Carroll S Lewis?

Carroll S Lewis?

Carroll S Lewis, says Vijay.

Here is your red line, get below that with Carroll S Lewis,

and you're through to the next round. But is it right?

Ooh.

Not so much Carroll S Lewis, I'm afraid, Vijay.

That scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 132.

Yeah. Sorry, Vijay. Listen, at least you're not in front of your boss!

Um!

And also you've got exactly the right author, it's CS Lewis,

-but it's Clive Lewis. You're thinking of Lewis Carroll.

-Oh!

So you've got Carroll from Lewis Carroll and, yeah, sorry.

It's one of those things that happens.

That's exactly why we have people back twice.

Those sort of brain moments.

Really sorry. Um, now, let's take a look.

CS Lewis, and it would have scored you...

..48 points. So, it would have kept you in the game.

Um, GO?

-George Orwell.

-George Orwell.

That would have scored you 38.

-TP?

-Terry Pratchett.

-Terry Pratchett, yeah.

For ages, I was...

Yeah. 7 points for that.

And the best answer on the board,

The Big Peruvian Book Of Small Peruvian Snakes,

it's Lemony Snicket, Lemony Snicket,

Daniel Handler, the real name.

But 1 point for that, very well done if you got that at home.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

We are at the end of our first round,

and the pair we have to send home with their high score of 132...

I'm afraid, Vijay and Kathie, it is you.

We'll see you again next time,

and I'm sure you'll go much, much further then.

In the meantime, thank you very much, Vijay and Kathie.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining three pairs, it's time for Round Two.

And so three pairs remain at the end of this round.

Obviously, we have to say goodbye to another pair,

so we have two pairs left for our head-to-head.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two today is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

Hm, Richard?

Yeah, we're going to show you 16 pictures now of people who've won

the BBC Sports Personality Of The Year.

All you have to do is name the most obscure of these, please.

Thank you very much indeed. So, as Richard just said,

we're going to put up 16 pictures.

That picture will stay up for the whole round.

You just have to shout out the name of anyone

you can see on that picture. Picture of pictures.

Let's reveal our 16.

And there they are.

16 overseas winners of Sports Personality Of The Year.

I'll give you a moment, Darren, to absorb that picture.

OK. Darren, who would you like to go for?

Um, I think I will say Niki Lauda.

Niki Lauda, says Darren.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Niki Lauda.

That is a good answer.

Down it goes, 16, very well done indeed. 16 for Niki Lauda, Darren.

Yeah, there he is on the bottom row.

The film Rush all about his rivalry with James Hunt.

A terrific film.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Donna.

-Happy days!

-Oh, really?

-Oh!

Um, OK. I think I know two or three.

But I'm not 100% sure, so I will go with the one I am sure of

and say Steffi Graf.

Steffi Graf, says Donna.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Steffi Graf.

It's right.

39 for Steffi Graf, not bad.

Not bad, Donna.

Yes, she won in 1988 where she won all four Grand Slam titles

and the Olympics in the same year.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Now, Greg.

Er. Not so good for me.

I will say Greg Norman.

Greg Norman, says Greg.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Greg Norman.

Mm. I'm afraid Greg Norman not helping you there.

That scores you 100 points.

Yeah, sorry, Greg, I know who you mean,

but it's not Greg Norman, I'm afraid.

Thank you, Richard. We are halfway through the round.

Let's take a quick look at those scores.

16, Darren, well done, the lowest score of the pass there.

Darren and Helen looking pretty good for the head-to-head at this stage.

Then, 39 is where we find Donna and John,

and then 100, I'm afraid, Greg and Natasha.

Natasha, that may not be the last 100 points of the round,

so, if you can find a low score, you could be in with a shout,

you never know. Good luck with that. We will come down the line now,

can the second players please step up to the podium?

So, Natasha.

Um, I think the least obvious one I know is Dan Carter.

Dan Carter. Dan Carter, says Natasha.

No red line for you as you're the high-scorers.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Dan Carter.

It's right.

That is a great score, look at that, very well done indeed, Natasha,

exactly what we required from you,

a 4, taking you up to 104.

Very well played, Natasha, he won it in 2015

when New Zealand won the Rugby World Cup,

the biggest point-scorer of all time

and you've very nicely shown your dad up there as well, so,

-terrific work.

-Very good.

Thank you, Richard. Now, then, John.

There's two or three that I could guess, but I am going to say

-Jack Nicklaus.

-Jack Nicklaus?

-Yeah.

OK, well, your target is 64 or less, that's what you red line looks like,

let's see if you can get below that with Jack Nicklaus.

It's right.

You're into the head-to-head, very well done indeed, John.

Down to 10, very well done.

Takes your total up to 49.

Well played, Jack Nicklaus.

that's who you thought Greg Norman was there.

18-time Major winner, which is a record that people...

It was literally about to be obliterated by Tiger Woods,

and then fate itself intervened and it still remains the record.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Now, then, Helen. Helen, the competition is on here.

We need a correct answer from you that scores you 87 or less.

How do you like the board?

Not very much, really!

Um, there's a couple I think I know.

There is a female tennis player on the top row,

I just can't get her name.

I just can't get her name. It's on the tip of my tongue, unfortunately.

I think there's a boxer,

I think Mike Tyson's there, but I'm going to go for Andre Agassi.

-Andre Agassi, says Helen.

-Mm-hm.

Let's see if it's right, let's see

how many of our 100 said Andre Agassi.

There is your red line.

It's right, and you're through.

30 for Andre Agassi.

Taking your total up to 46.

Won in 1992, the picture of him there, you can see,

is with a very good wig, but it is a wig,

and he writes about it very movingly in his autobiography,

which is a great read.

But he said he was wearing this hairpiece

and actually he didn't give 100% in some games

because he kept worrying that it was slipping or it was going to come off

so he just didn't try his best.

Isn't that amazing when you think back?

-Yeah.

-30 points for him, anyway.

Now, let's fill in the rest of these, shall we?

Up the top there is Usain Bolt, would have scored you 28.

The first-ever winner of the award,

the Australian middle distance runner Herb Elliott,

very well done if you said him, it is a pointless answer,

never beaten over the mile or 1,500 metres.

The tennis player whose name you were looking for is Martina Hingis.

She would have scored you 10.

The next row, next to Dan Carter, was Carl Lewis.

It would have scored you 14.

And then Chris Evert.

She would have scored you 16.

Pele, of course, on the next row, 23.

Not Mike Tyson but Evander Holyfield

would have scored you 8.

Then, Cristiano Ronaldo, lovable as ever, would have scored you 50.

Next row down, you have got Brian Lara...

..3 points.

And then, I know people at home will be split between people

saying Olga Korbut and people saying Nadia Comaneci,

and it's Olga Korbut. She would have scored you 12.

And then Rafa Nadal.

And he scores 30.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

At the end of our second round, the pair we send home

with our highest score of 104...

Natasha and Greg, I'm afraid it is you.

Natasha, the lowest scorer of that round,

seems harsh to be going home with that,

but you've got to carry your dad, I'm afraid, that's just how it is.

We'll see you again next time, and I'm sure you'll go much further.

Thank you so much, Natasha and Greg.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two pairs, it is now time for our head-to-head.

Congratulations, John and Donna, Helen and Darren,

you're now one step closer to the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot which currently stands at £4,250.

APPLAUSE

We have made it to the head-to-head, which is nice because,

from here on in, you can confer before you give your answers,

and the first player to win two questions

will be playing for that jackpot.

Best of luck to both pairs, let's play the head-to-head.

Here is your first question and it concerns...

-Richard?

-Five clues now to facts about the 37th president

-of the USA, Richard Nixon.

-Thank you very much indeed.

Let's reveal our five clues, and here they come.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

John and Donna, you are our low-scorers, so, you will go first.

We know a couple for sure,

-which are probably the highest scorers.

-Yep.

Er...

-We should take the bottom one.

-We'll take the bottom one

-and say David Frost.

-David Frost, say John and Donna.

Now, then, Helen and Darren,

-do you want to talk us through the board?

-I'd love to.

We know a couple. The top one, Watergate.

The only other one we know is Anthony Hopkins, the actor,

-so we'll go with Anthony Hopkins.

-You're going for Anthony Hopkins.

So, we have David Frost and we have Anthony Hopkins.

John and Donna said David Frost, let's see how many of our 100 people

said David Frost for the British broadcaster.

It is David Frost.

51 for David Frost.

APPLAUSE

Helen and Darren, meanwhile, have gone for Anthony Hopkins.

Let's see if that's right for the Welsh actor,

let's see how many of our 100 people got Anthony Hopkins.

It's right.

And it beats 51, look at that, down it goes.

Good answer! 9 for Anthony Hopkins.

Very well done indeed, Helen and Darren.

That means, after one question, you are up 1-0.

Yeah, very well played, the both of you.

Now, the name generally given to the scandal?

-Watergate.

-Watergate, yeah, would have scored you 81.

That's after the Watergate building,

but that's why we put "gate" after all scandals now.

Which is weird because it wasn't a scandal about water,

it was simply Watergate.

Name of the Nixon family dog?

He was accused of taking lots of bribes and said

the only thing he'd ever been given was the dog for his kids,

and it was called Checkers and would have scored you 2.

And his middle name?

-Milhous.

-Milhous, absolutely right.

Also, Bart's best friend in The Simpsons.

It would have scored you 19 points.

It was also his mother's middle name.

She was Hannah Milhous Nixon. And he was Richard Milhous Nixon.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. So, here comes your second question,

Helen and Dan, you get to answer this one first.

But, John and Donna, you have to win this one to stay in the game.

So, best of luck with it.

Our second question today is all about...

OK.

-Richard.

-That's nice, isn't it?

-Isn't it?

-Quite often we show you pictures of lovely, cute animals.

-Yeah.

We're now going to show you pictures of blood-sucking animals.

They might be cute! They might be cute bloodsucking animals.

Five of them. Which is the most obscure?

Let's reveal our five blood-sucking animals.

Ah!

Oh.

Interesting.

Helen and Darren will go first.

OK. Not too great for us, I think, we'll go for A, leech.

A, leech, say Helen and Darren.

Leech.

Now, then, John and Donna.

-We can talk through the board here?

-Oh, please do.

I think that's a lamphrey.

Obviously, C's a something moth.

D's a flea. E's a hungry bird!

LAUGHTER

I think we'll have to go, because we have to win the point,

we'll have to go with lamphrey.

OK, lamphrey say John and Donna.

So, Helen and Darren have gone for the leech for A.

Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said leech for A.

It's right. Oh!

I didn't even have time to say it was right,

that's how high it scored.

91 for leech.

OK. Meanwhile, John and Donna have gone for lamphrey or lamprey.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that for B.

It's right, and it wins you the point.

Very well done indeed, down that goes to 20.

Look at that.

APPLAUSE

That's what we needed, John and Donna,

you are back in the game. After two questions, it's 1-all.

Yeah, very well played.

You're also right that C is a something moth.

I was thinking, something moth? But what is it?

Then you realise it's about blood-sucking animals.

-Vampire.

-It's a vampire moth.

Vampire moth would have scored you 35 points.

D is, of course, a flea, that would have scored you 75 points.

And my favourite name... That's a cute-looking bird, right?

Dial down the lipstick would be my advice.

It feeds off great beasts of burden

and its name, there is a clue to that in its name,

it eats ticks from big beasts of burden.

-So, it's doing a service.

-It's doing a service, exactly right.

And it is, and it's a great name for a band if you're looking for a name,

-oxpecker.

-Ha!

-That is a good name for a band.

-Don't you think?

-Isn't it just?

-1 point.

-Look at that. Oxpecker.

Ha-ha! There we go. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Here comes your third question. This is the decider.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final and plays for the jackpot.

Very best of luck to both players.

Our third question today is all about...

-There we are.

-Five clues to facts about famous attractions in Paris.

-Paris attractions would be another way of putting that.

-There we are.

Very nice indeed. Let's reveal our five clues, and here they come.

We have got...

Let's read those again.

There we are. Now, John and Donna will go first.

-Well...

-OK.

-You, you say.

-Yeah, because it was me who... Ha!

-Your choice.

-OK, we're going to go for number four,

-and we think that's the Bastille.

-The Bastille,

say John and Donna.

Now, Helen and Darren,

would you like to talk us through the whole board?

Yeah, well, the top one's the Eiffel Tower.

The second one down we think is the Champs-Elysees.

And then I think it's Gare du Nord.

And then, Notre Dame at the bottom there.

-Gare du Nord?

-We'll go with Gare du Nord.

Gare du Nord, say Helen and Darren.

So, we have the Bastille and we have Gare du Nord.

John and Donna say Bastille.

Let's see how many of our 100 people went for the Bastille.

It's right.

65, that's quite a high score for the Bastille.

Helen and Darren, meanwhile, have gone for the Gare du Nord.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

It is the Gare du Nord.

And it wins you the point, very well done indeed.

Down it goes, 26,

and it means, very well done indeed, Helen and Darren,

after three questions, you're through to the final 2-1.

Very nicely played.

The Eiffel Tower would have scored you far too many points.

Take a look, it would have got you 81 points.

You were right about the Champs-Elysees,

that would have scored 48.

Do you know this last one?

-Yeah?

-Pantheon?

-It is the Pantheon.

-Phew.

-Pantheon.

-I asked you because I didn't know how to pronounce it

-and I knew you would!

-Ah.

6 points for that. It's where Marie Curie is buried

-amongst many other people.

-There we are. Thank you. Thanks, Richard.

So, the pair leaving us at the end of the head-to-head round,

I'm afraid it's John and Donna. But it's good news, really,

because it means we get to see you again next time.

I'm longing to see what tie John's going to wear.

It's been lovely having you on.

See you next time. We look forward to that very much.

Thanks so much, John and Donna.

APPLAUSE

But, for Helen and Darren, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Helen and Darren,

you have seen off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £4,250.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Well, that will be very nice indeed.

Last time, we said goodbye to you at the end of Round One.

This time, here you are in the final.

Fantastic. I mean, tremendous.

What would you like to see come up in this last round?

Definitely some music, I think. Maybe some music and some film.

Yeah. Stuff from the '90s.

Stuff from the '90s.

OK, let's hope there's something on that board you like the look of.

Four categories will appear any second now, and they are...

Political comedy on-screen could be sort of...

-The Thick Of It and things like that, couldn't it?

-Yeah.

-You're good with that, aren't you? Sort of.

-Yeah.

Or Acting Juniors?

-Should we do Acting Juniors?

-Let's do it.

-All right.

-Acting Juniors.

-Acting Juniors, yeah.

Let's find out. Richard, Acting Juniors.

We are looking for any of the following, please.

We're looking for any film starring Cuba Gooding Jr.

We're looking for any film starring Sammy Davis Jr.

Or any film starring Harry Connick Jr, please.

So, any film starring any of these up to the end of August 2016

according to IMDB. The very best of luck.

Thank you very much indeed. Now, as always, you've got up to one minute

to come up with three answers and all you need to win that jackpot

is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Are you ready?

Good.

Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock. There they are.

Your time starts now.

-OK.

-OK.

-Copycat.

-Copycat.

-Yep. Or... Memphis Belle, remember that?

-Oh, yeah, OK.

-I remember Memphis Belle.

-Cuba Gooding, Daddy Day Camp.

-Daddy Day Camp?

-Yeah, and I'm sure he was in something called

Kangaroo Jack, but I'm not 100%.

That is definitely a film, but you're not sure whether he's in it.

Yeah. No.

-OK. So, Daddy Day Camp.

-Memphis Belle.

-Memphis Belle.

-Copycat.

-Copycat.

-Yeah.

-Any more Harry Connick Jr? No Sammy Davis Jr?

-Don't know.

OK. OK.

Harry Connick Jr. I can see him playing the piano in something.

Harry Connick? He's a musician, though, isn't he?

Yeah.

-Cuba Gooding.

-So we're going to have Daddy Day Camp.

Yeah. Copycat.

-Copycat.

-And Memphis Belle.

-And Memphis Belle.

-Anything else for Harry Connick Jr?

-I can't think of anything else.

-Shall we go with that?

-Yeah.

It sounds like you've got your answers. Shall we stop the clock?

Brilliant, look at that.

OK. Let's have your answers, what have you got?

OK.

-Well, for Harry Connick, we've got Copycat.

-Copycat.

-Or Memphis Belle.

-Memphis Belle.

And for Cuba Gooding, we've got Daddy Day Camp.

-Daddy Day Camp.

-Yeah.

Of those three excellent answers,

which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Copycat?

-Copycat.

-Yeah. We'll go with Copycat.

-Yeah.

-OK, least likely to be pointless?

-Possibly Memphis Belle, yeah.

-Memphis Belle.

-Memphis Belle.

OK. And Daddy Day Camp goes in the middle.

OK. Let's put those answers up on the board in that order,

and here they are.

We've got Memphis Belle, Daddy Day Camp and Copycat.

Well, you've found three good answers there

for your Junior actors.

Any one of those could feasibly win you that jackpot.

£4,250.

A decent jackpot to be taking home. What would you like to do with it?

Helen, I'm going to ask you first.

Well, it's Darren's 40th birthday on the horizon,

so a good chunk of it would go to make that really memorable.

That is really wonderful.

Darren, how about you?

I'm pretty much agreed on that front, I think.

Strange, that, yeah!

-Yeah, I'll take that.

-Very good indeed.

Well, three good answers, as I say. Your first answer was Memphis Belle.

In this case, we were looking for Harry Connick Jr films.

If this is pointless, it will win you £4,250.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Memphis Belle.

It's right.

All it has to be now is pointless for you to win the jackpot, £4,250.

Down we go for Memphis Belle, down through the 20s into the teens.

Into single figures, we're still going down.

6!

APPLAUSE

Not a bad score.

Not a bad score at all. Annoyingly, not a pointless score, though.

So, we have to move on to your next answer, which was Daddy Day Camp.

In this case, we were looking for Cuba Gooding Jr films.

If Daddy Day Camp is pointless, it wins you £24,250.

How many of our 100 people said it? Daddy Day Camp.

It's right.

Well, Memphis Belle took us all the way down to 6.

Daddy Day Camp now takes us down through the 20s, into the teens.

We're into single figures, down it goes.

We pass 6, pass 4,

down to 1! AUDIENCE GASPS

Oh, man!

APPLAUSE

So close.

One person got Daddy Day Camp.

Oh, that is unlucky.

We move on to your third and final answer, which is Copycat.

This is the one you thought was your best shot at a pointless answer.

If this turns out to be pointless, it wins you £4,250.

Let's see how many of our 100 people named Copycat

as a Harry Connick Jr film. Is it pointless?

It's right.

Your first answer Memphis Belle took us all the way down to 6.

Your second answer, Daddy Day Camp, took us all the way down to 1.

Copycat now takes us into single figures.

Down we go, we pass 6, down at 4! Oh, no!

-APPLAUSE

-Oh, well.

Three very good low scores there. Really good.

That second one, Daddy Day Camp,

you were just within touching distance of the jackpot,

but I'm afraid you didn't find that pointless answer you needed.

So, today's jackpot will roll over on to the next show.

But what a strong performance across the show. Really, really impressive.

Plenty to be proud of, and you get to take home a Pointless trophy,

so very well done indeed, Helen and Darren. Very good.

Yes. Really unlucky.

We've had a string of 1-point answers

in our jackpot round recently and, yeah, very unfortunate.

The good news, in the 60 seconds, you mentioned Kangaroo Jack,

which is not on any list here.

There was Lightning Jack which was a pointless answer for Cuba Gooding.

Might be what you were thinking of.

Let's start with those Cuba Gooding Jr films.

Some brilliant films on this list here.

Three great ones and one... Yeah.

A Few Good Men is a pointless answer.

American Gangster with Denzel Washington

is a pointless answer.

Coming To America with Eddie Murphy,

a very small part in that when he was very young.

He plays a boy having his hair cut.

And Norbit, another Eddie Murphy film as well.

Everything pointless there apart from Jerry Maguire, Snow Dogs,

Men Of Honour, Boyz n the Hood.

As Good As It Gets, Selma, Pearl Harbor,

Instinct, The Butler, Rat Race, Boat Trip and Daddy Day Camp.

Sammy Davis Jr.

Cannonball Run 2 was a pointless answer, Johnny Cool, Porgy and Bess,

The Threepenny Opera, everything pointless there

apart from Ocean's 11, which was the biggest scorer.

The original Cannonball Run, Robin And The Seven Hoods, Tap,

Sweet Charity and A Man Called Adam.

And Harry Connick Jr now.

Tougher group of answers here.

Dolphin Tale 2 was a pointless answer.

Dolphin Tale wasn't a pointless answer.

Mickey, PS I Love you, The Simian Line.

His scoring answers were Memphis Belle and Copycat,

Dolphin Tale, The Iron Giant, Independence Day,

Hope Floats, and Little Man Tate.

Very well done if you got a pointless answer at home.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard,

and thank you so much, Helen and Darren.

Very sadly they didn't win the jackpot today,

which means it rolls over on to the next show

when we will be playing for £5,250.

APPLAUSE

Join us then, to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE