Episode 42 Pointless

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless,

the show that makes big winners out of the lowest scorers.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one?

Hello, my name is Mark and this is my friend Alex,

and we are from Penrith in Cumbria.

Couple number two?

Hi, I'm Vijay from Peterborough,

and this is my friend and colleague Kathie from Lincoln.

Couple number three?

I'm Jon, this is my wife Donna, and we're from Leven in Fife.

And finally, couple number four?

Hi, I'm Greg, this is my daughter Natasha,

and we're here from Crouch End in North London.

And these are today's contestants.

Thank you very much, all of you. A warm welcome to Pointless.

Great to have you with us. We'll get a chance to chat

to each of you throughout the show as it goes along.

So, that just leaves one more person for me to introduce.

As watchable as an internet video in which a goat and cat are friends,

it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya. Hi, everybody. Hiya.

That does sound watchable.

-Doesn't it?

-Yeah. Now, lots of...

Lots of old friends re-joining from the last show, which is really nice, isn't it?

Jon and Donna are back, got through to the head-to-head.

Jon once again wearing a tie.

He's in a suit this time. Suit.

He's gone the full Monty...

Well, not the Full Monty, the opposite of the Full Monty!

The full suity. That's nice, isn't it?

And a couple of people have got to making up to do after the last show.

Vijay's got some making up to do for Kathie,

they're on podium two, and, more importantly,

Greg has really got some making up to do for his daughter,

who was great. Greg less so.

You know, it's just so hard when you bring your dad on national television, right?

What can you do?

It's going to be fun, though. And one new pair, Mark and Alex,

-and we've put them on podium one.

-And that's nice.

-Do you think?

-I think that's difficult.

-Yeah.

-No hiding place there.

-No.

-There's no hiding anywhere, let's be honest.

-Those podiums are too short.

-LAUGHTER

But podium one especially.

To be fair to them, they have camouflaged themselves quite well.

I think someone gave them a bum steer on what our set was going to be, though.

It's the jungle set we haven't done so much, have we, this time?

Exactly, yeah.

They look like they're on The Island with Bear Grylls.

-There we are. Well, thank you very much.

-Pleasure.

Now, Helen and Darren didn't win the jackpot last time,

so we add another £1,000 to that.

So today's jackpot starts off at...

Wow!

Right, if everyone is ready, let's play Pointless.

OK. Now, remember this, the pair with the highest score at the end of each round will be eliminated.

So, just keep your scores nice and low, you'll be fine.

No conferring, of course, until we get to the head-to-head.

Other than that, best of luck to all four pairs.

Our first category this afternoon is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. And the question concerns...

Richard?

We're going to show you seven definitions of words on each board.

Each of those words are also used as boys' names.

Just try and give us some nice obscure answers.

There's going to be 14 in all to have a go at, so the very best of luck, everyone at home.

Thanks very much indeed.

Let's reveal our first board of clues, and here they are.

We have got...

I will read those all again.

-Mark?

-Mmm-hmm.

-Welcome to Pointless.

-Hello.

-Welcome to Pointless.

-Now, Mark, what do you do?

-I'm currently a student studying in Leeds,

a business student.

There we are. How's that going, the business studies?

-OK, yeah.

-What year are you in?

I'm just about to start my third year now.

-OK. So this is the last year in Leeds?

-Yeah, final year.

Did you know Leeds at all before you started studying there?

-No.

-Do you love it?

-I do. Fell in love with the city.

Fantastic. Masses going on in Leeds.

-Yeah, yeah.

-Mark, there's a good boys' name, just to start with, right there.

Mark, what would you like to go for on our board?

I think I'm going to go for the river in western and central Scotland,

and I'm going to go with Clyde.

Clyde. Let's see how many of 100 people went for Clyde.

It's right.

Always tough going first in these rounds,

and you have absolutely smashed it.

Well done. 25, Mark.

-Good start to the show.

-Yeah, a very good start.

Well played, there, on podium one.

It's not used so much these days, Clyde.

-Perfectly nice.

-Yeah.

Bonnie and Clyde. He was Clyde.

-He was a Clyde.

-The Clyde.

-The Clyde one in Bonnie and Clyde.

-I wonder if Clive has sort of slightly edged Clyde out?

Yes, and then Clive itself has been edged out by every other name.

-Yeah, it's true. Yeah.

-Hasn't it?

-Yeah.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now, Kathie, welcome back.

-Hello!

Round One. Round One last time.

Kathie, remind us what you do?

I'm a manager for a global software company.

Very good indeed. And what are your interests, Kathie?

-I'm a musician.

-What do you play?

I play the trombone.

-Do you?

-I do, indeed.

And in what sort of environment? What sort of ensemble do you play?

Anyone who asks me! But basically I play with three bands regularly.

I play with a ten-piece swing band, a full big band,

and I play with the oldest police band in the country,

the Humberside Police Band.

The oldest in the country? How long's it been going?

Literally since last September! That is...

1861.

-That's amazing.

-And it's not a brass band, it's a copper band.

-LAUGHTER AND GROANS

-Absolutely.

And - hahaha - that's funny!

You got a... HE GROANS

I don't mind. You know what, any reaction, I'm fine.

But that shows you the versatility of the trombone.

-Absolutely.

-There it is, swing or big-band, slightly brassy.

And in the police band, I imagine slightly more sort of..

-You know?

-All sorts of things. All sorts of things.

Slightly more mellow in that sort of ensemble?

-It is. Beautiful instrument.

-Oh, very beautiful instrument.

Now, Kathie, what would you like to go for?

Well, I'm going to go with one of my big band members' names,

and that's a person who defeats an enemy or opponent in a battle - Victor.

That's a big band name, isn't it? SHE LAUGHS

Definitely. Victor. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Victor.

It's absolutely right.

-Oh!

-Oh!

Oh, 83 for Victor!

I'll get him. I'll get him next Tuesday.

-You should.

-It's quite a brave name, Victor, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-If you call a tiny baby Victor.

-Victor.

-It's quite a lot of pressure on their shoulders.

-Yeah.

-Might as well call your child Captain Awesome.

LAUGHTER

I'm not sure I know anyone under the age of maybe 87 called Victor.

Yeah, Vic you would think would be a name that could come back.

-Vic.

-You would think maybe some of the hipsters would start calling their kid Vic.

Vic. Thank you, Richard. Right, Donna, welcome back.

-Thank you.

-Remind us what you do, Donna?

Well, I am a singer and actress,

but when I'm not doing that I work in the box office of a lovely little theatre in St Andrews in Fife.

Oh, that sounds lovely.

Do you have sort of touring shows that come round there,

or do you have your own repertory there?

No, we are a receiving house now,

we used to be a repertory theatre but no longer, sadly.

Oh, that's a shame. OK, now, Donna.

What would you like to go for on our board of boys' names?

Well, I think I know a few...

..but I've decided I'm going to go with...

..agree to give or allow - Grant.

Grant. Grant, says Donna.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Grant.

It's right, obviously.

Down it goes. 25's our low score.

35's where you end up with Grant.

Not bad at all.

Yeah, that's well chosen, I think, Donna.

Well played. It was originally a surname, Grant, became a first name.

And it comes from the French, grande, so it means large or big, Grant.

I didn't know that. There we go, thank you. Thank you.

Now then, Greg. Remind us what you do, Greg?

I'm a freelance copywriter in advertising.

What are your interests when the copywriting is done?

I like to travel. We like to travel as a family.

We... Actually Natasha grew up in Hong Kong.

We lived there for 25 years.

And from there we travelled to lots of different places.

Anywhere left you're longing to go that you haven't yet been to?

Antarctic is still on our bucket list, yeah.

Yes, you have to be sort of ship-bound, don't you?

-Yes, indeed. It has to be a cruise.

-Definitely, yeah.

This board is all yours.

If you want to go through it, you'd be very, very welcome.

I'd love to, but I'm not going to do a very good job, I don't think.

A device for lifting heavy objects is Jack.

North American word for a toilet is John.

At a stab I'd say the aromatic plant...

I was thinking might be Benjamin.

I don't know what the overzealous or obsessive fan is.

So, I'm going to go safe and hope that Natasha's got a really good answer

and say North American word for a toilet, John.

John, says Greg.

Well, 83's our high score at the moment,

let's see how far down the column we get with John.

It's right. Well, you pass the 83.

74. Not bad.

-Poor John, though.

-I know.

Spelt differently, that's the key.

Now, shall we fill the rest of these in?

You were right about the device, that is of course a jack.

Would have scored you 53. Would have been a better answer.

-The aromatic plant...

-Basil.

-It's basil.

Would have scored you 40.

Now, this last one is interesting, isn't it?

It looks like it should be stalker.

All I can think of is stalker, that's all I can think of.

Which is not a boys' name. Don't even think about it.

So, this, actually... This is a very recently coined word,

and it comes from a song by Eminem.

And the answer is...

-Stan.

-Stan. I have heard someone say Stan before.

-There you go.

-Wow. It's now in usage?

Yeah. We learn something new every day, don't we?

-We do.

-Haven't we learned something, there?

Thank you very much, Richard. Now, we're halfway through the round.

Let's take a quick look at those scores. 25, well done, Mark.

Our newcomers here, and first podium to answer, as well.

So, very well done indeed. 25, good stuff.

35's where we find Donna and Jon.

74 is where we find Greg and Natasha

and then 83, Kathie and Vijay.

Vijay, there'd be something very poetic about you riding to Kathie's

rescue, here. So if you can find a nice low scoring answer, good luck with that.

We're going to come back down the line now.

Could the second players please step up to the podium?

OK, let's put seven more definitions up on the board, and here they are.

We have got...

I'll do that again.

There we are. Natasha.

Remind us what you do, Natasha?

I'm a student at King's College, London.

Very good. And what are you studying?

Liberal arts.

Excellent. Tell me what liberal arts is.

You do a bit of everything, so I get...

I get, like, the opportunity to do geography at the same time as film.

-That's quite fun.

-It's the new thing, liberal arts.

Liberal arts. It's very, very fashionable now.

And it just keeps your horizons quite broad, as well.

-Yeah.

-Do you, then specialise, come your last year, or...?

Yeah, so I've chosen film as my major.

There we go. That's fun.

Very good. Now, Natasha, 74 is your score at the moment.

If you could possibly score eight or less you would definitely be in the next round.

I don't think that's going to happen.

I'm going to have to...

I'll try the bottom one, and say...

Duke.

Duke, says Natasha.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Duke.

There is your red line.

Bad luck, I'm afraid, not Duke.

That scores you 100 points, takes your total to 174.

It's another good name, though.

If you are about to have triplets, I would say Duke, Stalker and Victor,

you could do an awful lot worse.

That sounds so like someone's badly made-up NATO phonetic alphabet, doesn't it?

What's the number plate? Duke, Stalker, Victor, eight.

Stalker, Duke...

Thank you very much. Now, then, Jon.

Welcome back. Lovely to have you with us.

And so impeccably dressed, as ever.

Jon, remind us what you do?

I'm a civil engineer and I work for the local authority's contractor in Perthshire.

Very good. In what sort of areas of civil engineering?

-Roads maintenance.

-Do you have, somewhere in the back of your car,

a flashing light that you can just stick on the roof?

I absolutely do, yes.

-In orange, though?

-Yeah, orange.

Oh, that's a shame. It would be fun if it were blue.

I have to admit, it doesn't go on the roof very often,

cos I don't like scratching the paint.

Sometimes highway maintenance cars have sort of things that are a little bit police car like.

-Yeah.

-Do you have that on your car?

-Well, no.

-Always quite funny when people think there's a police car and everyone is going very slowly.

"Oh, it's highway maintenance..." Vroom! Off they go.

Now, Jon, 35 is where you are.

You'll never overtake Natasha and Greg's high score of 174,

even if you score 100.

What would you like to go for, safe in the knowledge that you are through?

So there's only one there that I don't know,

and it's the engineering one, which I should.

But I'm going to say that to tease someone in a playful way is Josh.

Josh, says Jon. No red line for you. You're already through.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Josh.

It's right.

It's a good answer, Jon.

Look at that. Cracking Jon form, there.

13 is your score, the lowest score of the round so far,

taking your total up to 48.

Well played, Jon. I recently did, for a Radio 5 thing,

I looked through every single player in the Premier League,

and Josh is the most popular name in the Premier League.

-Is it really?

-Yeah, and there was only one Gary.

There's 400 names and only one Gary left.

That says a lot.

-Doesn't it? No stalkers. Not a single one.

-Yet.

-Yet.

-Thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Vijay.

Vijay. Oh, you've been handed a bit of a lifeline here, Vijay.

Vijay, remind us what you do?

I'm a software developer and I work in one of Kathie's many teams.

-That's right. Whose idea was it to come on the show?

-I don't know.

I think it was myself. We were just bantering around the office kind of thing -

"who wants to go on Pointless?" And Kathie was the first one, the loudest.

-She was the only person!

-She was the loudest, I would say.

We're both the loudest in the office, shall we say.

So, you know when we are in the office.

-Do you watch Pointless in the office?

-I watch it vigorously.

Wonderful. Vijay...

90 or less keeps you in the game.

I was going to go a risky one, but Natasha gave me a lifeline

and now I'm going to go for the bottom one.

-I'm going to say Dean.

-Dean, says Vijay.

Here is your red line, nice and high.

Let's see how far down the column we get with Dean.

It's right, and you're through.

47 for Dean.

130 is your total.

Well played, Vijay. And that's where the name Dean comes from.

It comes from the job. That's nice, simple.

-It is nice.

-Wrapped in a tight little bow.

There you are. Nice, thank you very much, Richard.

Now, Alex, welcome to Pointless.

What a nice way to arrive on Pointless.

Thanks to Mark's low scoring antics, you are now through to the next round,

so it takes all the pressure off.

-I commend you on your shirt, by the way, which is nice.

-Thanks.

Always good when people make an effort, Richard.

Yeah, we should one day.

Like that'll ever happen!

-What do you do, Alex?

-I'm a student in Leeds, with Mark.

At Leeds as well, and also from Penrith?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Have you known Mark for years and years and years?

Yeah, since we were about ten.

That's nice. And what are you studying?

Business with Mark.

Did you choose your degree course because your best friend, Mark,

-was doing it, or is it just complete coincidence?

-No, coincidence.

-Oh!

That's nice. Very good, good.

Now, Alex, remember, you're through, so it doesn't matter what you go for.

Why not just talk us through this board and just see if you can find

a really nice low scoring one up there,

cos there is definitely one that's flummoxing everyone.

It's a good job he did well in the last round, really,

cos I'm struggling a bit here. Erm...

I'll go small cut or notch - Nick.

OK, Alex says Nick.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Nick.

No red line for you.

It's right.

And there we are. 70 is what it scores you.

95 is your total.

You are in round two.

Well played, and that actually means victor.

Cos Nick comes from Nike, which is Greek for victory.

Nicholas is victor of the people.

How about that? Yes, there's one that's going to be confusing everyone.

It took me a long time to get the second one, down the valley.

-Dale.

-Dale, I know, ridiculous.

Would have scored 42 points.

Let's look at the network of interconnecting rabbit burrows.

-Warren.

-Warren. Would have scored you 79.

And the male of various animals.

-Tom.

-Tom.

Would have scored you 55.

-And this last one.

-Shall we have some guesses at this?

-Anyone else?

-Lemuel.

-Not Laurie, not Lemuel.

-That's a shame.

-Levi.

-Lewis?

-Lewis is the answer.

Would have scored you one point. Very well done if you got that at home.

-Best answer up there.

-There we are.

Thank you very much indeed. We are at the end of our first round.

We have to say goodbye to one of our pairs. And Natasha and Greg, I'm so sorry.

It could have gone either way. It was Round Two last time.

-Could have gone up to the head-to-head and beyond.

-Yeah.

I'm afraid it's Round One, we have to say goodbye to you.

Anyway, it's been great having you on. Thanks so much for playing, Natasha and Greg.

APPLAUSE

But, for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

So, here we are into Round Two, with only three pairs.

And at the end of this round we'll have to say goodbye to another pair.

I'd like to congratulate our newcomers, Mark and Alex,

for making it through that round with such aplomb.

Well done. But Jon and Donna, our lowest combined scorers.

And Jon, Josh was the lowest score of the whole round,

so, well done to you. Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two this afternoon is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

Would whoever's going first please step up to the podium?

OK, let's find out what the question is.

Here it comes. We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many countries that have won Eurovision more than once as they could.

Yes, looking for the name of any country apart from the UK that's won

the Eurovision more than once, up to and including the 2016 contest.

Thank you very much indeed.

Alex, Eurovision.

I think I'm going to go for the Republic of Ireland.

The Republic of Ireland, says Alex.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said the Republic of Ireland.

78. Not bad.

78 for the Republic of Ireland.

Yeah, they've won it seven times.

But haven't won it for 20 years.

So, we still do jokes about Ireland winning,

and they haven't won since 1996.

-Really, they haven't?

-Yeah.

-There it is.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Now, Kathie.

I'm feeling I need to apologise to Vijay now,

because, apart from the UK, the only one I could think of was Ireland.

This is a great opportunity for you to

-explore your knowledge of Eurovision.

-Yes.

An informed choice here, even if it's just a guess.

I'm going to go for...

-..France.

-France, says Kathie.

OK, well, let's see how many of our 100 people said France.

-It's right.

-Of course it's right.

You see? And it's scored you much less than Ireland.

44.

Yes, five wins for France. They haven't won since 1977.

There we are. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Donna.

-Hmm.

-Hmm.

-OK.

I haven't watched the Eurovision Song Contest for a long time,

but I think I'm right in thinking that Israel had more than one go.

OK, let's see. Israel, is that right?

How many of our 100 people said Israel?

It's right. 78 is the high score, we pass that.

44 is the low score, we pass that.

Down we go.

Oh, Donna, 16.

Very well done indeed.

Yes, a very good answer. They won two years in a row, '78 and '79, Israel,

and then a few years later with Dana International.

-Got their third win.

-Thank you very much.

We are halfway through the round. Let's have a quick look at those scores.

16, Donna, look at that. Donna and Jon, once again, supreme.

Then up to 44, where we find Kathie and Vijay.

78 is where we find Alex and Mark.

Well, we're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please step up to the podium?

So, remember, Jon,

we are looking for countries that have won the Eurovision Song Contest more than once.

Not a good one, this, for me at all.

I know that we have, but that's not my answer.

I'm going to say, and I hope it's right, Sweden.

Stands to reason, surely, Jon.

Well, I know they've won it once, so...

Well, exactly.

There we are. Now, lovely low score from Donna has set you up well.

There is your red line. If you can get below that with Sweden you are

into our head-to-head. Let's see how many of our 100 people said Sweden.

It's right.

Not bad. 64.

80 is your total. I think you've done enough.

Yes, six wins for Sweden, the very first one being Abba in 1974.

They've also won twice in the last five years.

Which goes to show it's not entirely dominated by the Eastern bloc these days.

Thank you, Richard.

Vijay. Vijay, let me just tell you now before you give your answer,

35 is what you are aiming for.

Just trying to wrack my brain as to which one's going to be the lowest one.

I'm going to say...

-..Italy.

-Italy, says Vijay.

Here is your red line. That's what you have to get below to be sure of

a place in our head-to-head.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Italy.

It's right.

You've done it. Look at that. Down you go.

Down to 18. Not bad at all.

Takes your total up to 62.

Two wins for Italy, 1964 and 1990.

Thank you, Richard. Now then, Mark.

Ooh, yes, this is going to be interesting.

We need the lowest score of the round.

You need to score 1 or less here, Mark.

Sorry. Yes, you need to score 1 or less.

-Do you watch the Eurovision Song Contest at all?

-Not really, no.

I was hoping it was going to be X Factor or Britain's Got Talent

when I saw the category come up.

But I'm going to risk it and go with Latvia.

Latvia.

That's what 1 or less looks like. And Latvia.

That's what 1 or less sounds like to me, certainly.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Latvia.

-Oh.

-I had to risk it.

It was Latvia or bust, wasn't it? And I'm afraid it's bust.

100 is what that scores you, and 178 is your total.

But a brave way to go out, Mark.

Yeah, exactly what you had to do. They have won once, in 2002.

Ireland is the biggest scorer by quite some way,

so you were left with a mountain to climb.

There's no answer that would have won it for you, in fact,

cos the lowest scorers would have scored you 9 points

and they are Luxembourg and Switzerland.

Well done if you said one of them.

10 points for Austria, 11 for The Netherlands.

14 for Ukraine would have been a very good answer.

15 for Denmark.

You would have got 23 for Norway, 30 for Spain, and Germany,

who have been in it since 1956, have only ever won it twice.

But would have scored you 42 points.

And we've heard the top three scorers already.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. So at the end of our second round,

the pair we have to say goodbye to with their high score of 178, Mark and Alex, it is you.

But I have no doubt that when you return next time you'll do much, much better.

It's been great having you here. Thank you so much, Mark and Alex.

But for the remaining two pairs, it's now time for our head-to-head.

Congratulations, Jon and Donna, Kathie and Vijay.

You are now one step closer to the final and a chance to play for our

jackpot, which currently stands at £5,250.

The big news is we are now at the head-to-head round,

which means you can start playing as a pair,

you can confer before you give your answers,

and the first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

Now, Jon and Donna, we were here last time.

You were our low scorers, I think, as well, in the head-to-head last time.

And you failed on that occasion to get through to the final,

so you've got to be hoping that this will be your opportunity.

But Kathie and Vijay, you left us at the end of round one last time and

here you are in the head-to-head.

So, who knows, with that kind of trajectory behind you, what might happen?

Very, very best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head-to-head.

Here is your first question. And it concerns...

-Richard.

-We're going to show you five pictures of actors now

dressed up as Father Christmas. Can you tell us who the actors are, please?

Thanks very much indeed. Let's reveal our five actors, and here they are.

We've got:

There we are. Five actors in Father Christmas costumes.

Jon and Donna, you will go first as you are our low scorers.

We are going to go for E,

and that's Billy Bob Thornton.

E, Billy Bob Thornton, say Jon and Donna.

Now then, Kathie and Vijay, can you talk us through that board?

No.

We know A and B.

B is Sid James and A is Richard Attenborough.

Shall we take a punt for D, then?

Just make up a name? Cos we're not going to...

Well, if you've got a name, go for it.

I just think we're going to make one up.

Because we're not going to get lower than E at that rate.

A, Richard Attenborough, Xander.

I loved your optimism that your chances

of making up a name that happened to be right...

LAUGHTER

Who knows? Well, we never will, sadly.

But you're going to go for A, Richard Attenborough.

So, we have Jon and Donna saying Billy Bob Thornton for E.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

It's right.

17 for Billy Bob Thornton.

Kathie and Vijay, meanwhile,

have gone for A and said Richard Attenborough.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Richard Attenborough.

It's right.

37. Not bad. Not a bad score.

But it means, Jon and Donna, very well done,

after one question you are up 1-0.

Yeah, good answer, Billy Bob Thornton,

second best answer on the board.

Sid James is the biggest scorer on the board.

Would have scored you 68 points.

We will leave C for the moment and go on to D.

That is Lindsay Lohan. And C, let's take a look.

Now, he's very famous for a big American drama series now.

He's bald in that.

And it doesn't look... He looks more like Hugh Dennis there,

-I'm going to say.

-He does a bit.

-But it's Bryan Cranston.

And it was a pointless answer, as well, so well done if you said that.

Completely, I would say, unrecognisable.

Completely. There we are.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. OK, here comes your second question.

Kathie and Vijay, obviously you get to answer first but you have to win

this one, so a little bit of pressure on you there.

So our second question is all about...

-Michelangelo, Richard.

-Yeah, I really hope you know your Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, both teams,

because... No, we are going to ask you five questions now about the artist,

the Italian Renaissance artist, Michelangelo.

What's the most obscure answer?

Thank you very much indeed. OK, let's reveal our five clues, and here they are.

I'll read those all again.

Kathie and Vijay will go first.

I think we should stick with the safe one.

-We've got no choice.

-OK.

OK, we are not terribly sure on the majority of the board,

so we are going with the middle one, and the Sistine Chapel.

Sistine Chapel, say Kathie and Vijay.

Now, Jon and Donna.

Talk us through that board.

Well, we're pretty sure that the statue is David.

We should know his surname beginning with B.

I feel I should know, but it won't come to me.

And no idea about the Pope, either.

-So, we are going to have to say David, aren't we?

-Yeah.

OK, David versus the Sistine Chapel.

Sistine Chapel, say Kathie and Vijay.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said that.

Sistine Chapel is right.

72.

Unsurprisingly quite a high score, there.

Jon and Donna, meanwhile, have gone for David.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said David.

It's right.

And it wins you the point.

Down to 41 for David, and that means, Jon and Donna,

after only two questions you're straight through to the final, 2-0.

Yeah, very well played.

Now, this second one, the surname,

absolutely the sort of thing you think you should know, isn't it?

One of those things you must have heard.

-Do you know it?

-No.

-Do you think you should know it?

Oh, I think I really should.

Michelangelo Buonarroti.

-Very well done if you said that.

-Buonarroti.

-11 points.

-Good for our 100. That's good.

-11, that's good.

Now, the decade in which he died. We know it's after 1513.

That's the good news. It's actually quite a long time after 1513.

1560s is the answer, there.

Would have scored you ten.

And the Pope was Julius II, and that is a pointless answer,

so, very well done if you said that.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Well, that brings us to the end of our head-to-head round and the pair

we have to say goodbye to, I'm afraid, Kathie and Vijay.

Much, much stronger performance across the show today.

Great to see much more of you this time, but I'm afraid this is where we say goodbye.

But thank you so much for playing, Kathie and Vijay.

But, for Jon and Donna, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Jon and Donna. You have seen off all competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot is standing at £5,250.

Now, that's exciting.

That would be a nice prize to be taking home.

Last time, into the head-to-head,

beautiful low scoring all the way through the first two rounds,

low scorers in the head-to-head,

and then you didn't make it through to the final.

This time, you've come back and made sure you do it absolutely properly,

through 2-0, which is always a good sign.

What would you like to see come up in this last round?

For me, it would have to be musical theatre.

Well, that's quite good. I mean, musical theatre quite often creeps into this round.

-Would be good. Or celebrities.

-Or celebrities, OK.

Jon, how about you?

Well, I'm not fussy, to be honest. Whatever comes up, it's fine.

Do you know what, just as I watched Jon,

this nice, benign, smiling face, I think you'd make a great Father Christmas, Jon.

-He would, eh?

-I'd have to grow a beard, though.

-Has he'd done it before?

-No, but he should,

-cos he has had a bigger beard than that.

-Yeah.

There are always well stuffed stockings in our house.

Yeah, I'm going to stop you there, Jon!

LAUGHTER

Let's see what today's selection of categories looks like.

Let's hope there's something in there that you like the look of.

We have got...

opera, red things,

most capped international rugby players,

Game of Thrones.

Well... If we did that one, you'd be on your own.

Yeah, I would, wouldn't I?

Which is the one you're thinking of?

Game of Thrones. I've just watched that myself.

I'm not allowed to watch that. I get too excited, so she watches it on her own.

-Opera would be useless.

-No.

-Red things is a bit of a potluck, isn't it?

-Yeah.

And rugby - no.

-So it's red things or Game of Thrones.

-Absolutely.

Well, do you fancy playing on your own?

Not really. Not really!

LAUGHTER

-Will we go red things, then?

-I think we should.

-Right, red things, please.

Red things. OK, longing to find out what this is.

That's what we call chickening out, by the way, that's what we call that.

That's perfectly all right, perfectly all right.

Three very different questions here. Hopefully one of these will suit you.

We are looking for any of the following, please.

Any actors in the 1998 film The Thin Red Line, according to IMDB.

Any stations on the Central Line on the TfL map, please, in London.

Or we are looking for any artists who have had singles which feature

the word red in the title who have had a UK top 40 hit, please,

up to the beginning of August 2016.

HE READS OPTIONS

Very, very best of luck.

Thanks very much indeed. As always,

you've got up to one minute to come up with three answers.

And all you need to win that jackpot is for just one of your answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

Let's put 60 seconds up on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

Well, you can forget about the actors in The Thin Red Line because

-I don't know that film at all.

-That's me as well.

Artists who have had a single, red.

What about red balloons, whatever her name, Neneh Cherry.

-No, it wasn't that.

-What's her name then?

UB40 - Red, Red Wine.

-Well, done, Jonny!

-Chris De Burgh, Lady In Red.

Was it not just Nena, the girl with the balloons?

-Nena, you're right.

-99 Red Balloons, it was Nena.

You're doing great.

Stations on the Central Line. Liverpool Street.

What's his name, Neil Diamond, did he not have one about red, red wine?

-He did! Neil Diamond.

-That's another one.

Was that a single, though, I don't know?

Possibly not. The other ones were.

Definitely. Anything else?

-Ten seconds.

-I know.

-Stations on the Central Line.

I don't know. I ken, I've been on it loads, but I can't remember.

I don't know. Liverpool Street is the only one I can think of,

and I'm not even going to go there.

OK, that is your time up.

Sounds like you've got some good answers, though.

-Let's hear them.

-Right.

So, out of those ones we mentioned, are we sticking with Nena?

-Yeah, we'll go with her.

-OK, Nena.

-Nena.

-Nena.

And we're going to go with UB40 - Red, Red Wine.

UB40.

-And...

-And the other one you said was... Chris De Burgh - Lady In Red.

Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Nena, I think.

-Nena, we'll put Nena last.

-Least likely to be pointless?

-UB40, I would say.

And Chris De Burgh goes in the middle.

OK, let's put those answers up on the board in that order, then.

And here they are.

We have got UB40, Chris De Burgh and Nena.

Well, very, very best of luck.

Three good answers on the board, there.

If one of these turns out to be pointless

and wins that jackpot for you, quite a nice jackpot today, 5,250 quid.

What would you like to do with that? Jon, I'm going to ask you first.

If I got that money,

I would give it to Donna and she would spend it on taking me on a cruise.

LAUGHTER

-Donna?

-I second that.

Wonderful! That reflects exactly the same sort of teamwork as we saw during that minute there.

That's fabulous. Now, three good answers.

UB40 was your first, for Red, Red Wine.

In all three cases we were looking for any UK top 40 single

with the word red in its title.

If this is pointless, it will win you £5,250.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said UB40.

It's right. Now, if UB40 takes us all the way down to zero,

you leave here with £5,250.

Down we go. Through the 30s, into the 20s.

27.

But that's why you put that one first.

We move your next answer, Chris De Burgh.

In this case we were looking for the Lady In Red,

another UK top 40 single with red in its title.

How many of our 100 people said Chris De Burgh?

If it's pointless it wins you £5,250.

It's right.

UB40 took us all the way down to 27.

Chris De Burgh now takes us down through the 30s.

30 for Chris De Burgh.

But we'd have been very surprised if these had been pointless answers.

We now move onto a really good answer.

Your third and final answer, Nena.

You had no hesitation putting this as your last one,

the one you thought was probably your best shot at a pointless answer.

99 Red Balloons is the song.

If it's pointless, it wins you £5,250.

How many of our 100 people said Nena?

It's right.

UB40 was right, took us all the way down to 27.

Chris De Burgh was also right, took us to 30.

Well, we've passed 30 and we've past 27.

Down we go. Nena...

Ooh - 9.

Well, that's a great score, though.

Fabulous low score, 9.

Annoyingly, though, we only take pointless answers in this last round,

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot.

That will roll over onto the next show. But it's been lovely having you here on shows.

And you've done so, so well right across each show you've been on.

It's just been great fun to have you with us.

And you get a Pointless trophy to take home for your trouble.

So, very well done indeed, Jon and Donna.

APPLAUSE

Yes, three correct answers, there.

Well done. I can't help thinking you might have done better on Game of Thrones, but we'll never know.

We will never know. There's only two other artists

who would have scored more than one point on the red one.

Those are three of the top four answers.

Prince and the Rolling Stones, with Little Red Corvette,

and the Red Rooster also would have scored you 10.

8 and 1 point for Kate Bush, Basement Jaxx, Taylor Swift, Billy Ocean and the Sugababes.

Everything else is pointless. We'll take a look in a moment

at the pointless answers. We'll start with The Thin Red Line,

a brilliant film, and some big actors here.

Everyone pointless in that film apart from Sean Penn, Nick Nolte,

John Travolta, Jim Caviezel, George Clooney and Adrien Brody.

Loads of pointless answers on the Central Line.

The pointless train also stops at Barkingside, Chigwell, Debden,

East Acton, Fairlop, Gants Hill, Holland Park, Lancaster Gate,

Newbury Park, change at Queensway for Redbridge, Roding Valley,

Ruislip Gardens, Snaresbrook, South Woodford, West Acton,

White City and Woodford.

All of those pointless answers. Well done if you got one.

And artists, now, who've had a single with red in the title.

Garth Brooks - The Red Strokes. Kylie Minogue - Red Blooded Woman.

The Beautiful South with the wonderful Old Red Eyes Is Back.

The Drifters - You're More Than A Number In My Little Red Book was a pointless answer.

Lots of others. Daniel Merriweather and Elbow both had songs called Red,

both pointless answers. Elvis Costello, Turning the Town Red.

Meatloaf is there. Red Letter Day by the Pet Shop Boys, as well.

Lots of other pointless answers there. Very well done if you got one at home.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard, and thank you, once again,

Jon and Donna. It's been great having you here.

Very sadly, though, they didn't win today's jackpot,

which means it rolls over onto the next show when we will be playing for £6,250.

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE