Episode 26 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you. Hello. I'm Alexander Armstrong. A very warm welcome to Pointless,

the quiz show where popular answers mean nothing and obscure answers mean everything.

Let's meet today's players.

First, we welcome Hlupe and Tiwo, our first pair this afternoon.

-How do you two know each other?

-She's my older sister and we live together in Leeds.

That doesn't sound like a Leeds accent to me!

I know. I grew up in a few places and travelled a little, so my accent's odd.

-You have an accent of the world.

-Exactly.

-International accent.

-Where would you call home?

-Probably Rome, Italy,

because I was born there and I grew up there for most of my life.

-And you, too, Hlupe?

-I was born in Malawi and we moved to Rome when I was very young.

-You're so cosmopolitan!

-Yes! We do embellish the story

and make it even more exciting sometimes!

Sometimes. "Not this afternoon. We're going to keep it quite dull!"

-Lovely having you on.

-BOTH: Thank you.

Next, Alexandra and Francis. How do you know each other?

-I'm the youngest of three. Francis is my father.

-Very good.

-Francis, your idea to come on the show or was it Alexandra's?

-Alexandra's.

-It was my idea.

-I see.

-What do you do, Francis?

-I'm a retired mathematics teacher.

Ahh! Another teacher.

They do very badly.

-They haven't covered themselves...

-By and large!

-You'll buck the trend, I'm sure.

-Best of luck to the pair of you. Lovely having you here.

Sarah and Caz, how do you two know each other?

This lovely lady is my mummy.

It's a parent-and-child show!

We enjoy doing things together, so we decided to come on the show.

-What do you do, Sarah?

-I work in a school.

But I'm not a teacher.

-I'm a learning support assistant.

-Very good indeed.

-How about you, Caz?

-I'm a retired school teacher!

-LAUGHTER

-Is it the same school?

-It is!

-It is the same school! Very good.

Great to have you on the show. Best of luck to the pair of you.

And finally, we welcome back Lesley and Ben.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final. This is your final chance.

-Ben.

-Hello.

-What are you hoping's going to come up this afternoon?

-I'd like some film questions. Bit of television, maybe.

-Film and television.

Amazing how often that comes up.

-Lesley, how about you?

-Similar, and perhaps some music thrown in.

-Some music thrown in.

Richard, I'm sure, will see what he can do.

-LAUGHTER

-You're going to love this show!

Very best of luck. We'll find out more about all of you throughout the show.

One person left to introduce, a man for whom facts and figures are bread and butter.

-He's my Pointless friend, he's Richard.

-Hiya.

-Hello.

-How are you, sir?

-How are you?

-I'm very well, thank you.

Only one returning pair today, that's Lesley and Ben,

who were rather good last time. Let down by the medical round.

And three new pairs,

two of whom have teachers, or retired teachers,

one of whom's got a learning support assistant, as well. So they're doomed!

Looking very good for Hlupe and Tiwo, isn't it?

Especially as Round Two, if you can get through to it,

has a geographical bent to it, I would say.

Sort of.

-Geographical bent?

-It will help to be well travelled.

-OK, well, thanks very much, Richard.

We put our questions to 100 people before the show,

but we are after the obscure answers they didn't get.

You're trying to find a pointless answer, an answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add another £1,000 to it.

So today's jackpot starts off at £4,000.

-AUDIENCE: Ooh!

-Very exciting.

Right, let's play Pointless.

In the first round, each of you must give me one answer

and you cannot confer with your partner.

Whichever team has the highest score will be eliminated.

Our first category this afternoon is:

Hlupe's thrilled with art.

-I am so happy right now(!)

-Very good.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many movements and schools in art

as they could.

Movements and schools in art.

-Richard.

-The correct answers in this round

are all movements and schools... LAUGHTER

..in art.

Hlupe and Tiwo, you all drew lots before the show,

and this afternoon you get to go first.

In this round, you'll be glad to hear,

we'll give you a choice of seven possible answers.

The first set of seven answers reads like this:

I'll read those one more time.

At least one of those answers is pointless.

Be careful, because at least one answer is incorrect.

If you pick an incorrect one, you will score the maximum of 100 points.

Hlupe, you weren't looking forward to this one.

-No.

-Not a good category for you?

-Not really.

But now you see this behind me,

you surely recognise some of those.

-I do.

-This is good.

-Yes.

Er, I think...

I'm going to go for something safe. Or at least what I think is safe!

OK.

And I'm going to go for Cubism.

Cubism.

OK. A safe answer, you think. Let's see if that is correct.

If it is, let's see how many people said Cubism.

33.

33, Hlupe. Not a bad answer. Cubism, Richard?

Yes, Cubism was started really by Picasso and Braque

as a way of showing different sides of something on the same flat surface.

-Beautifully put.

-Thank you. Just don't ask me to paint one.

OK, very well done, Hlupe. 33 points.

-Alexandra.

-I recognise some of them.

It's just, whether to go for it, or go for one that I know is right.

-I think I'll go for Surrealism.

-You're going to go for Surrealism.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said it.

It was right.

It beats Cubism.

12!

-Phew.

-Not a bad answer, Alexandra. That scores you 12.

So, Richard, Surrealism?

A movement that came out of France in the mid 1920s,

influenced by Sigmund Freud, amongst other people.

Dali and Magritte are probably the most famous Surrealists.

Thank you very much, Richard.

OK, so, Sarah, we come to you.

Remember, we're looking for schools or movements in art.

I'm going to guess at, erm...

..Photorealism.

Photorealism.

-Fingers crossed.

-Fingers crossed.

Photorealism.

It sounds right!

-Hopefully.

-Hopefully, it will be. Let's see.

Photorealism.

It's right. Very well done, Sarah.

It's the best answer so far!

CHEERING

Very well done. Photorealism is a pointless answer. It adds £250 to today's jackpot.

Takes the total up to £4,250 and it scores you nothing.

-Well done. Photorealism, Richard?

-Well done, Sarah.

-Well, flukily done.

-It was!

-But it doesn't matter. It's still £250 and zero points.

Photorealism emerged in the late '60s.

It's paintings that are made to look as much like photographs as possible, this painstaking detail.

Chuck Close would be probably the most famous Photorealist.

-Have you seen any of it?

-Chuck Close?

-It's amazing.

-It's like a photo!

-It is like a photo.

-It's so real!

Very well done, Sarah. Good guess.

-Ben.

-I was going to go for Surrealism, because that's probably my favourite.

So, you have a favourite? This means that you're at home in this category.

They ring a bell. A lot of them ring a bell.

A lot of them ring a bell.

But I'm going to go for the Pre-Raphaelites.

The Pre-Raphaelites. OK.

Let's see if it's right and if it is, let's see how many people said Pre-Raphaelites.

There we are.

-Not bad.

-The Pre-Raphaelites score you 10.

-Pre-Raphaelites, Richard?

-The Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood

were formed in London in 1848.

Dante Gabriel Rossetti one of the more famous members.

Let's go through the board. Romanticism is a school of art. That would've scored you 6 points.

Out of those other two, Colour Field Painting and Cassagnes,

one of those is pointless, one of those is incorrect.

One of them sounds obvious, but maybe that's the reason I shouldn't go for it.

I'm afraid I don't have big enough Cassagnes to go with my first instincts!

-Colour Field Painting is a school.

-Absolutely right. Colour Field Painting.

Rothko, Barnett Newman were the most famous proponents. Big blocks of colour.

And Cassagnes, Andre Cassagnes, is the guy who invented the Etch A Sketch.

LAUGHTER That was an incorrect answer.

Very good.

We're halfway through the round, so let's take a look at the scores. Sarah and Caz on nothing.

Look at that. What a brilliant, brilliant answer.

Then we come on 10 to Ben and Lesley.

And then up to 12, Alexandra and Francis.

Hlupe, 33, not a bad score at all, but that puts you way out ahead.

OK, can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, seven more answers on the board.

We are looking for movements and schools in art.

Here we go.

I'll read those again.

At least one of those is pointless

and at least one of those is incorrect.

Avoid the incorrect ones or you'll score the maximum 100 points.

Now then, Lesley.

Is this a good subject for you? It is, isn't it?

It's not bad.

Just to put you in the context, the high scorers are Tiwo and Hlupe on 33.

If you can score 22 or less, you are definitely through to the next round.

I don't want to go with one that's too obvious, because we haven't got such a great score.

-OK.

-So I'll go with, erm,

-Geocentrism.

-Geocentrism.

Is that a stab in the dark?

-A little bit.

-Are you a collector of Geocentrist art?

-Only in my spare time.

-Only in your spare time.

Possibly in your dreams. We'll have to see.

Below that red line, you're through to the next round.

Let's see if Geocentrism is indeed a movement or school of art,

and if it is, let's see how many people said it.

I'm afraid it is in your dreams, Lesley.

That is an incorrect answer. You score the maximum of 100 points, taking your total up to 110.

-Richard.

-Sorry, Lesley. Geocentrism is the belief that the earth is the centre of the universe.

It was widely discredited in the 17th century,

-but...

-Isn't it?

Isn't it?!

It's just to the left of centre. LAUGHTER

So geocentrism not a school or movement in art.

One in five Americans still believe

-the earth is the centre of the universe.

-They still do?

-Yes.

Interesting.

Remember, we are looking for movements and schools in art.

-Caz, Sarah managed to find a pointless answer on that board.

-Thank you for reminding me!

I tell you what, there is at least one, maybe only one,

incorrect answer on that board and it has gone.

Which means there's at least one pointless answer still lurking.

Right.

I think I've heard of Impressionism, but I'm not sure.

-So I'm going to go, please, with Impressionism.

-You are going on a limb.

-You think you've heard of it.

-I think so!

There it is at the top of the board.

-No red line for you. You're through, whatever happens.

-Yes!

The high scorers are Lesley and Ben on 110.

-You're on nothing, thanks to Sarah's expert answer in the first pass.

-I could've said anything!

So let's see. Impressionism. Is it right?

If it is, let's see how many people said it.

Yes!

28 that scores you.

Takes your total up to 28. Richard.

-Impressionism?

-Impressionism developed in France from the 1860s.

The first ever group show of Impressionism was greeted with absolute derision.

They thought Monet and his contemporaries were lunatics.

And now it's probably the most popular form of art anywhere.

I saw Mike Yarwood last year at Blackpool Palace Theatre.

He was terrific.

-Yes. Brilliant.

-Bobby Davro, I saw.

-Yes.

-LAUGHTER

-All the impressionists. Marvellous.

Now, remember, we are looking for movements and schools in art.

-Francis.

-I'll play it safe and go for Minimalism.

Minimalism. There it is, third down.

The highest scorers are Lesley and Ben on 110.

If Minimalism can score you 97 or less, you are through to the next round.

Let's see if Minimalism is right. If it is, let's see how many people said it.

It's right, and you're through.

Very well done.

Minimalism scoring you just 3 points, taking your total up to 15.

Richard.

Good answer. It's an extreme form of abstract art,

developed in the States in the '60s.

OK, Richard, thank you.

-Tiwo...

-Yes.

You are the last to play.

-You can have as much fun as you like with this board. Think of it as your palette.

-Right.

I'm going to tell you that the high scorers remain Lesley and Ben on 110.

If you can score 76 or less you are through to the next round.

There is still a pointless answer on that board.

Still also at least one incorrect answer on the board.

I'm really worried about this, but when I first saw the board come up, I had one in mind.

-Mm-hm.

-Erm...

Pop art wasn't it, because I think that might be a few points.

Suprematism and Ferrule, I just don't know.

I was going to go for Dada, which I seem to have heard somewhere,

but I hope it's art-related, because otherwise we won't progress.

-I'm worried, but I'll go for Dada.

-OK, that's what you're going to say.

I can tell you that my ART belongs to DADA.

LAUGHTER

-Very good.

-That's a Stoppard line.

Anyway, let's see if that's correct and if so, how many people said it.

There is your red line, Tiwo. Below that red line and you are through to the next round.

Very well done, Tiwo. You're through.

9.

-APPLAUSE

-9 for Dada.

That takes your total up to 42.

-Richard.

-Very well played, Tiwo.

Dadaism started in Zurich during the First World War.

Marcel Duchamp's urinal, probably the most famous Dadaist piece of art.

Indeed.

Let's look through the rest of the board.

Pop art actually didn't score that many. It scored 11 points.

Suprematism and Ferrule, Alexander.

One is pointless and one is incorrect. What do you think?

Ferrule? No. Suprematism?

-Suprematism.

-Exactly right. Well done if you said that.

It's a Russian school of art from round about 1913.

Ferrule is the little metal band on paint brushes

that hold the bristles in. That's a ferrule.

Thanks, Richard. At the end of Round One, the losing pair, I'm afraid to say,

Lesley and Ben, it's you.

-This wasn't part of the script at all.

-No.

-You're meant to be going through to the final.

-We were.

-Can we stay?

-LAUGHTER

If you can persuade one of the other pairs to go, you're very welcome to!

You've been great. It's a shame we have to say goodbye.

-Thanks very much for playing. You've been great.

-Thank you.

For the remaining three pairs, it's time for Round Two.

APPLAUSE

Only two pairs can make it through to the Head To Head,

so one team is going to be leaving at the end of this round disappointed.

Your category for Round Two is:

WHISPERS: I'll go first.

Travel. There you go, Hlupe!

Decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second.

Whoever's first, please step up to the podium.

OK. So our Round Two question this afternoon concerns

international airports and their countries.

In this round, we're about to show you a list of airport names.

We asked 100 people to tell us which country these airports are located in.

-Richard.

-We're going to show you six airports on each pass.

Tell us the country they're in. The more obscure ones will score fewer points.

If you give us an incorrect answer, you'll score 100 points.

By "country", we mean a member of the UN

that is a sovereign state in its own right.

See how many you can get at home.

We're looking for the country in which these airports are located. Here we are.

We have got:

I'll read those one more time.

-Now then, Tiwo.

-Yes.

-There are the airports.

I want you to find a nice obscure one

and tell me which country it is located.

There's one that I'll probably hazard a guess at,

and that's Frederic Chopin in Poland.

Frederic Chopin, Poland. Francis knows that one and is nodding.

Tick. I think you might've got a star for that, as well.

-Thank you!

-Let's see if that's correct.

If it is, let's see how many people knew that answer. Frederic Chopin, Poland.

Very well done.

Very well done indeed. 14, Tiwo.

-Frederic Chopin, Richard?

-Well done, Tiwo. Poland's busiest airport.

-Named after Chopin, who, of course, was Polish. That's the clue, isn't it?

-Indeed.

Now then, Alexandra. Your father, I think, is rather good at this.

-Yes! No pressure.

-He's very good at this. No pressure at all.

There's definitely two that I know, but I think they'll be quite high.

The third one... I'm going to go for Narita in Japan.

Narita in Japan.

-Your father has nodded.

-Has he?

-That means it's good.

-Is it good? I hope so!

It's got to be. Francis says yes. It's probably right.

Let's see if Narita is in Japan and if it is, how many knew that.

Very well done. It is in Japan.

-Very good.

-Thank you!

7 points for Narita.

Very good answer. It serves Greater Tokyo, Narita Airport.

Thank you very much.

-Sarah.

-I would say this is probably going to be the most popular,

but I would say John Lennon is in the United Kingdom.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people knew.

John Lennon. Is it in the United Kingdom?

Yes, it is.

-And unsurprisingly...

-Well done.

..that was known by quite a lot of people. 63 that scores you.

Richard, 63 for John Lennon.

In Liverpool, of course. Renamed after John Lennon.

-Previously Jimmy Tarbuck Airport.

-That's right.

It's not the highest score on the board, though.

You did well to avoid Charles de Gaulle, which is the highest.

Would've got you 73. In France, of course.

-Kingsford Smith, Alexander?

-Australia.

It is. Sydney. Would've scored you 4.

-And El Prat, do you know that one?

-Is in Spain.

-It is.

If you go to Barcelona, you will land at El Prat.

Best answer. Well done if you got that.

Thanks, Richard. We're halfway through the round, so let's look at the scores.

On 7 points, Alexandra and Francis.

Then we double your score and we get to Tiwo and Hlupe on 14.

And then we come to Sarah and Caz.

I'm afraid you are way out ahead on 63.

Caz, you're going to have to hope for a really good board

so you can pick a nice obscure answer next pass.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

We're going to put six more airports on the board. Here they are:

I shall read all of those again.

Remember, we are looking for the country in which these airports are located.

You're trying to find the most obscure one.

Caz, you're the high scorers on 63. You have to find a low score here.

No, I don't think so!

I don't know any airports at all.

Erm... So it's going to be a high score.

It's going to have to be John F Kennedy International

-in the United States of America.

-OK.

You're going to have to hope this scores as low as it possibly can.

JFK Airport in the United States.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many said it. No red line for you.

Well done, it's right.

As you feared, it's a high scorer. That scores you 75.

It takes your score up to an unbeatably high, I'm afraid, 138 points.

-Richard.

-Yes, previously Idlewild Airport in Queens, New York.

So, Francis, you're through to the Head To Head.

Whatever happens, you'll never overtake Caz and Sarah's high score.

Bearing that in mind, have a bit of fun with the board.

Maybe see if you can find... Take a bit of a risk.

I suspect you might know all of these.

-Teachers don't guess. Particularly mathematics teachers.

-No!

-We're terribly exact!

-Yes.

We're going for Oliver Tambo, South Africa.

Oliver Tambo, South Africa. I...

-You might as well just give him the points.

-The very definition of magisterial.

Let's see if it is right. Francis says it is, it must be.

And if it is, how many people said Oliver Tambo?

It's right!

Very, very well done. 10 points for that.

Takes your total up to 17.

Richard. Oliver Tambo?

Well done, Francis. It serves Johannesburg.

-Named after the anti-apartheid politician.

-Thank you very much.

-Now then, Hlupe.

-Yes.

-You're on 14.

Whatever happens, you're through to the next round.

I'm going to be loyal in my answer

and I'll go for Malpensa,

because I believe that's in Italia.

OK. Malpensa, Italy. Let's see if it's right. If it is, let's see how many people said it.

Very well done. It is.

Look at that. Very, very well done, Hlupe.

That scores you 5. Takes your total up to 19.

Now, Richard, Malpensa, obviously I'm no linguist,

but to me, that sounds like it means "bad thought", "evil thought",

which I think is a shocking name for an airport.

It would be a shocking name for an airport in France.

But in Italy, it means "happy landing".

LAUGHTER I think that's right.

-Your Italian is better than mine.

-What dictionary was that you were using?

-Yes.

-Do you know what city it serves?

-Milano.

-Yes, exactly right.

Very, very good answer. Let's go through the rest of the board.

The Chhatrapati Shivaji. That, as the name might suggest, is India.

It would've scored you 11 points.

Schoenefeld is Germany.

Formerly the biggest airport in East Germany.

Jorge Chavez International, what do you think, Alexander?

Jorge Chavez... Venezuela.

It's the best answer. Would've scored 2.

Well done at home if you said Peru.

-It serves Lima in Peru.

-Lima in Peru.

Thanks. At the end of Round Two,

the losing pair with the highest score is Sarah and Caz.

Oh, dear, dear, dear!

-We haven't served you well, have we?

-You can say that again!

We've given you some rotten categories.

I'm really sorry.

Next time, because you will be back, let us know what we should do.

What should we be giving you?

-Luton Town Football Club would be good!

-OK.

-And maybe musicals.

-Musical theatre. Musicals would be good.

-Musicals and theatre.

-Yes.

I've got to say, that sounds like the worst show in the whole world!

But we'd win!

Let's keep our fingers tightly crossed!

-We'll very much look forward to seeing you back next time.

-Thank you.

For the remaining two pairs, things are going to get even more exciting as we enter the Head To Head.

Well done, Alexandra and Francis, Hlupe and Tiwo.

You've made it through to the Head To Head.

Only one pair can make it to today's final and play for the jackpot, which stands at £4,250.

CHEERING

You're going to go head-to-head on the best of three questions.

Each pair needs to give me just one answer. You are now allowed to confer.

Come up with an answer that scores less than the other pair and you will win that question.

The first pair to get to the best of three will play for today's jackpot.

Let's play Pointless.

Here is your first question.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many James Bond films with a single-word title as they could.

-Bond films with a single-word title, Richard.

-We're looking for any official James Bond film

whose title is a single word, up to the start of 2011.

There are five films on the list. See how many you can get at home.

OK. Thanks very much. Alexandra and Francis,

because you've played best throughout the show so far, you get to go first.

CONTESTANTS WHISPER

-What's it going to be?

-Octopussy.

-Octopussy.

OK. Alexandra and Francis going for Octopussy.

Hlupe and Tiwo, James Bond films with single-word titles.

We're getting a bit stuck, aren't we? We had Octopussy and GoldenEye.

I think we'll just have to go with it. Gone blank.

-GoldenEye.

-GoldenEye.

Very good. We have Octopussy and we have GoldenEye.

Alexandra and Francis have gone for Octopussy. Let's see how many people said Octopussy.

41.

APPLAUSE

41 for Octopussy.

-You're not happy with that.

-No.

-My second one was better.

-You don't fancy your chances against GoldenEye?

-No.

-Wow!

-Whereas you don't fancy your chances against Octopussy!

Would you like to swap?

-BOTH: We'll see!

-We'll see how it goes.

GoldenEye. Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many said it.

Which one is going to be lower?

-Whoa!

-Wow, look at that!

-16 for GoldenEye.

-What?!

APPLAUSE

Incredulity from Hlupe there!

After the first question, it is 1-0 to Hlupe and Tiwo.

-Richard.

-Well played, Hlupe and Tiwo.

-What was your other answer, Francis?

-Thunderball.

-Also would've lost.

-BOTH: Oh.

-GoldenEye's the best answer on the board.

-FRANCIS: Well done.

-Wow.

Let's take a look at all five. Yes, wow!

There's GoldenEye, 16. Thunderball, 34.

Moonraker, 35. Octopussy, 41 and Goldfinger on 69.

Well done to everyone who got all five.

Thanks very much, Richard.

Here is your second question.

This is the best of three. Alexandra and Francis,

you have to win this question to stay in the game.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many African countries beginning with 'S' as they could.

-African countries beginning with 'S'.

-Yes, African countries beginning with 'S'.

We mean a sovereign state that's a member of the UN in its own right

at the beginning of 2011.

We're looking for the English names, as listed on the UN website.

Any country in Africa beginning with 'S'. There are eight names on the list.

Thanks, Richard.

This time, Hlupe and Tiwo, you get to go first.

CONTESTANTS WHISPER

-Have you come up with an answer?

-I think we've got one locked in.

-We're pretty sure.

-Yes.

-Erm...

We're going to go for Sao Tome and Principe.

Sao Tome and Principe.

Very good.

-Did you have that one?

-We didn't have that one.

We've got Sierra Leone, Somalia,

Sudan, South Africa. Erm...

-Senegal?

-Yes.

-Senegal.

-Senegal.

-Senegal.

-Senegal.

-We'll try Senegal.

-Senegal.

So we have Sao Tome and Principe.

Let's put that to the test, see how many people said Sao Tome and Principe.

Very well done. I have a feeling this will be going a long way down.

-Oh, wow, look at that!

-CHEERING

Very well done. That is a pointless answer.

That adds £250 to today's jackpot,

taking the total up to £4,500.

It scores you nothing.

Alexandra and Francis, the very best you can hope for here is another pointless answer,

-and that would be a tie.

-No!

-Otherwise...

Otherwise, Hlupe and Tiwo

will be going straight through to the final. 2-0.

OK, you have said Senegal.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said it. Good luck.

Senegal.

It's right.

-29.

-Ooh, gosh, that many!

Wow.

Very well done indeed, Hlupe and Tiwo.

A great answer there, and a pointless one to boot.

It means that after only two questions, you are through in straight sets.

-Richard.

-Unbeatable and unstoppable.

You gave the best answer on both, so there's nothing that Francis and Alexandra could've done.

Let's take a look at all eight countries.

There's Sao Tome and Principe at the bottom.

Seychelles on one. Sierra Leone, 15. Swaziland, 20.

Senegal, we've already seen, 29. Somalia, 34.

Sudan with 46. Obviously that's at the beginning of 2011.

-South Africa at the top with 58.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

The losing pair at the end of the Head To Head, I'm afraid, is Alexandra and Francis.

-A faultless performance from you. You've just been outclassed.

-Yes.

Extraordinary. The two answers given are the two best answers giveable.

What are you going to take away from your first Pointless experience?

-We should've gone for GoldenEye!

-LAUGHTER

Dear, oh, dear! We'll see you again next time,

when I'm sure you'll go all the way through to the final.

Thanks for your input, Francis, and for your excellent performance as a pair.

Well done!

For Hlupe and Tiwo, it's time for our Pointless final

and the chance to win our jackpot of £4,500.

Congratulations, Hlupe and Tiwo. You've fought off the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £4,500.

The rules are simple. All you have to do is find a pointless answer,

an answer that nobody can think of.

We've had two pointless answers. You only need to find one more now to go home with that money.

You've got to choose a category and you can choose from these three options:

I'd probably go for international politics.

-What do you think?

-That would be more in your field. I'm happy to go with it.

-I know nothing about soul singers.

-OK. In which case, yes.

-Do you feel comfortable with politics?

-No, but I think...

-I'll go along for the ride!

-It's...it's...

That's not good!

-All right, well...

-International politics.

-Yes.

International politics it is. OK, let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Irish leaders as they could.

-Irish leaders. Richard.

-HLUPE: I have no idea.

Anyone who's held the office of president or prime minister of the Republic of Ireland since 1937,

right through to the 1st of January, 2011.

Effectively, that's any leader of Eire or the Republic of Ireland since 1937.

Phew! OK, you have up to one minute to come up with three answers,

and all you need to win that £4,500

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

Your 60 seconds start now.

-We've had a great time, haven't we?

-It's been great! Thanks, guys!

Unfortunately, that's one area of politics I really don't know much about.

Irish leaders, no idea.

I... I just don't know. I don't know why Neil Kinnock springs to mind.

He's probably someone totally different. But, erm... Who else?

I'm staying quiet.

I really can't think of anyone else right now.

-It's probably something really obvious, as well.

-I know.

It's seriously so difficult. I just, erm...

Do you reckon that if...

We'll just have to put the one person that you've got, because I know nothing about that.

Me, neither. That's one person that's probably wrong.

-Shall we just...?

-Yes.

-Do you want to...

-Let's use the 60...

-We need three answers.

-You need three answers?

-We need three answers.

Neil Kinnock? I don't know. We'll just have to make names up.

LAUGHTER

Paddy Ashdown.

OK, there is your minute up. Let's have three names.

We're looking for Irish leaders. I need three names from you and we will put them to the test.

-Erm... I'm going to go with Neil Kinnock.

-Neil Kinnock.

I actually know this is wrong, but I have no other names,

so I'm going to go for Paddy, because that's a popular first name, and Ashdown.

-And I know that's wrong!

-Well, we'll put him down. Paddy Ashdown and Neil Kinnock.

This is probably really ignorant, because he might be Scottish,

so I'm sorry about this if I've offended anyone, but Tony Benn?

Tony Benn.

Would you like to nominate one of those to be your last,

-your most confident answer?

-AUDIENCE CHUCKLES

-Not really!

-I think Neil...

-Neil Kinnock? We'll put him third.

-Which is your least confident?

-Paddy Ashdown!

OK, we shall put them up in that order.

We were looking for Irish leaders.

You only need to find one pointless answer to win that £4,500 jackpot.

Let's see if Paddy Ashdown is right. I think we know the answer to this.

Nonetheless, let's try it out. Paddy Ashdown. Make sure the column's working.

We knew that.

We knew that was the outcome. Your first answer was incorrect.

You only have two more chances to win today's jackpot. Let's try your next answer.

Tony Benn, you've said.

This has to be correct and it has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot.

But let's just see.

Is it a correct answer and if it is, how many people said Tony Benn?

-Oh, God!

-No. Bad luck.

-Where's he from?

-Bad luck.

-SHE SIGHS

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

Everything is riding on Neil Kinnock.

There he is at the bottom. You came up with this name quite quickly.

-Yes, I don't know why.

-From somewhere. Well...

People have landed on pointless answers

-for precisely that reason.

-Yes.

What would you do with £4,500?

-Shopping spree, maybe.

-Yes!

I'll be honest, I've got frivolous things in mind!

Well, you are one pointless answer away from that jackpot.

This has to be pointless. Your last of three shots at that £4,500 jackpot.

You're saying Neil Kinnock.

We are looking for Irish leaders. Let's see if it's right.

If it is, let's see how many people said it. Neil Kinnock.

-THEY GROAN

-Bad luck.

You didn't find that all-important pointless answer,

so you didn't win today's jackpot of £4,500, which rolls over to the next show.

You've been fantastic contestants and you get to take home our Pointless trophy.

BOTH: Thank you. APPLAUSE

So, then, Richard...

-Well, all three of them were politicians.

-Thanks!

That we can say! None of them Irish or in Irish politics, but they were politicians.

-Yes.

-Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers.

There's some big names on the list.

Albert Reynolds. Issued the Downing Street Declaration with John Major, '92 to '94.

He was the Taoiseach.

John Bruton followed him as Taoiseach.

Douglas Hyde. Charles Haughey, who was Taoiseach three times.

Patrick Hillery, Sean T O'Ceallaigh,

Erskine Childers, Cearbhall O'Dalaigh, Liam Cosgrave,

all pointless answers, all would've won the money.

Well done if you got any of those at home.

-Did you recognise any of those?

-Just one.

-Patrick Hillery.

-It's reassuring to know that it would've never come.

-I wouldn't have known.

-It is somehow.

It was tough. Unfortunately, we do have to say goodbye to you, Hlupe and Tiwo.

You have been fantastic. Great having you on the show.

-Thank you both so much for playing.

-BOTH: Thank you.

APPLAUSE

Nobody's won our jackpot today, which means it rolls over onto the next show

when we'll be playing for £5,500.

AUDIENCE: Ooh!

-Join us next time. Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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