Episode 35 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Hello. I'm Alexander Armstrong. A very warm welcome to Pointless,

the quiz where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

-Let's meet today's players.

-APPLAUSE

So first we welcome back Dan and Danny.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final and this is your final chance.

Dan and Danny, remind us what happened last time.

We got all the way to the first round

where, er, Dan didn't know his U2.

-I did, I just didn't say them.

-LAUGHTER

-Oh, you two!

-LAUGHTER

It's great to have you back.

-Remind us what you do, Dan.

-I'm a marketing executive for a political communications company.

Which is as sexy as it sounds.

-What do you do, Danny?

-I'm a trainee teacher.

I'm about to go out to China to do some teaching.

-What are you going to be teaching?

-English.

-Wow.

-Where are you going in China?

-Just outside of Shanghai.

Right you are. Great having you back on the show. Best of luck.

Next, we welcome back Bob and Bill. You were also on the show last time. Remind us how you did.

We got to the Head-to-Head and lost it.

-Yes, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie...

-Yes.

-..and the names of their spawn.

-Yep.

LAUGHTER

And you came up with David, which, frankly, Brad and Angelina, is a perfectly sensible name!

What do you do in your spare time, Bob?

I'm a poor piano player.

-You can't be a poor piano player.

-I assure you, I can!

-Really?

What about you?

I like to play the guitar and sing.

Have you ever put your skills together?

-Many years ago we played in a band.

-Oh, you did? Were you on keyboards, Bob?

-I was on drums then.

-On drums.

You're multi-instrumentalists! You're like Justin Bieber!

Great to have you back on the show. Let's see if we can't get you all the way to the final.

Next we welcome back Liz and Jane. You were on the show, as well, last time.

Three returning pairs. What happened to you?

We got to the second round and then I thought of the wrong quotation.

You wanted literature to come up last time. Did it? No, it didn't.

What would you like, Liz, this afternoon?

I would like anything to do with perhaps mythology.

-It does come up from time to time.

-The arts...

-LAUGHTER

-Not today!

Not today.

-Liz, what do you do in your spare time?

-I go trampolining, erm -

No, no! Just stop there a second!

-You do it professionally?

-No.

-I mean properly.

And finally, we have got Emily and Amy.

-How do you two know each other?

-We met four-and-a-half years ago at Loughborough University.

-What were you studying, Emily?

-Psychology.

-I always imagine Loughborough has something to do with sport.

-Yes.

-Usually.

-But you weren't doing the psychology of sport?

-No.

-Or, sorry, sport psychology.

-No sports was involved in my life back then.

-Unlike now!

-Now's a different story.

-They can't get you off that trampoline!

-LAUGHTER

-Oh, dear!

What about you, Amy? What were you doing at Loughborough?

-Communication and media studies.

-In sport. Yes. Brilliant.

It's fabulous having you both on. We'll find out more about all of you throughout the show.

There is only one person left for me to introduce. A tour de force in the world of obscure knowledge.

-He's my Pointless friend, he's Richard.

-Hiya.

APPLAUSE

In the world of obscure knowledge, you are a tour de force.

-The world of obscure knowledge.

-LAUGHTER

HE SIGHS

-Shall we get on?

-Let's!

-Excellent.

It's going to be a battle royale today, I think.

Three returning pairs. Bob and Bill got through to the Head-to-Head. They were very strong.

Emily and Amy may have their work cut out.

The first two questions, both very different areas.

High culture and low culture.

We put all our questions to 100 people before the show.

We are after the obscure answers they didn't get.

You're looking to find a pointless answer, an answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add another £1,000 to that.

Today's jackpot starts off at:

Right, let's play Pointless.

In the first round, you must give me one answer. You cannot confer with your partner.

Whichever team has the highest score will be eliminated.

Our first category this afternoon is:

Mm... Food.

Can you all decide who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many types of curry as they could.

As many types of curry. Bill's thrilled with that.

-Richard.

-The correct answers will be dishes

that can typically be found on a curry house menu.

Dan and Danny, you all drew lots before the show and you get to go first.

In this round, we'll give you a choice of seven possible answers in each pass.

Your first set of seven answers reads like this:

I'll read those one more time.

At least one of those answers is pointless,

but be very careful because at least one is incorrect.

Pick an incorrect one and you will score the maximum of 100 points.

Dan and Danny, curries...

-Do you eat a lot of curries?

-Yes, I really love them.

So, this is playing to your strengths?

-I think I know a pointless, but I'm not going to risk it.

-What?

-Not after last time.

-What? No! Atone!

-LAUGHTER

-I just want to get a right one.

It's probably the hottest curry there is.

I had it on a night out and it was really a bad decision.

-I'm going to say phaal.

-Phaal.

-OK. You're hoping phaal is the correct answer.

-Yes.

And if it is, you're hoping hardly anyone said it.

Let's find out how many people said phaal.

It's right. It's right down...

Very well done. Look at that.

Well, you didn't suffer in vain, Dan.

That phaal has just scored you 6 points. Very good. Richard.

Well done. That's probably the hottest curry on most menus.

10 to 12 ground chillies in a standard portion.

OK, well, phaal scored you 6.

-Bob, types of curry... Sounds fun?

-It does, yes.

-Do you eat curry?

-I eat a lot of curry.

I always have the same meal.

Exactly. I don't study the menu enough to know what is on there.

I'm going to go for rogan josh.

You're going to go for rogan josh.

Let's see if it's correct, and if it is, how many people said it. Good luck, Bob.

He's right.

Down it comes. 37.

It's a correct answer, but it's a high scorer.

-Rogan josh.

-Yes, a medium-strength curry.

It used to be Kashmiri lamb stew but has been changed over the years by curry houses.

Thank you very much, Richard. Now then, Liz, types of curry?

I'm not a curry eater, so this is a complete guess.

Because I like the name of it, I shall go for pasanda.

Pasanda. There it is, three up from the bottom.

OK. Pasanda, you're saying.

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, let's see how many said pasanda.

It's right. Well done, Liz.

Down it comes. 13. Very well done. Pasanda.

-Pasanda, Richard?

-It's a mild curry with a creamy sauce,

usually with almonds and coconut.

-Emily.

-Hi!

-We're looking for types of curry.

Do you eat curries?

-Rarely.

-Really?

-Only if my dad's paying.

-Really?

I'm tempted to say vindaloo, obviously, because that's the main one, but...

..samba...

I'm just going to have to apologise, but I'm going to say samba.

-Samba.

-Samba.

-What do you think samba is? Sounds delicious.

-Erm, a dance?

-LAUGHTER

-Sorry!

Samba, you're saying. Let's see if it's right.

-If it is right, I reckon it's going to go a long way down.

-OK!

It has to be right, and if it is, let's see how many people said it. Good luck.

It's right! Very well done, Emily.

Down it comes. Very, very well done!

CHEERING

Samba is right. It's a pointless answer. It adds £250 to today's jackpot

and it scores you nothing.

The total is now £3,500.

-Very well done. Richard.

-Very well played. A pointless answer.

It's a hot-and-sour curry with lemon juice and lentils,

as you well know.

Very good. Let's take a look at the rest of the board.

If you had gone for it, you'd have got a fairly hefty score of 70 points. Well avoided.

Ceylon is also a curry, but a very low-scoring one. It would've scored you 2.

And Yegor is a character played by Tim Curry in Fly Me To The Moon.

It was an incorrect answer.

Very well done at home if you said samba.

Very well chosen, Emily.

Halfway through the round, let's take a look at the scores.

On no points at all, Emily and Amy. Looking very strong.

Then we come up to Dan and Danny, courtesy of your phaal.

Then up to 13 for Liz and Jane.

Bob and Bill, 37. Who would've thought that would be a high score?

You are way out in front.

Bill, you're going to have to find a low-scoring answer, maybe a pointless answer.

We'll come back down the line. Can the second players take their places at the podium?

OK, we'll put seven more answers on the board.

We are looking for types of curry. We have got:

I'll read those one more time.

At least one of those answers is pointless.

But be very careful, because there is at least one incorrect answer.

Try and avoid those incorrect ones.

So, Amy, no pressure. We are looking for types of curry.

The high scorers are Bob and Bill on 37.

If you can score 36 or less with this answer,

you're definitely in the next round.

I think, because of Emily,

I'm going to play it safe a little bit now,

and I think I'm going to go for bhuna.

-You're going to go for bhuna?

-Yes.

OK. Let's see if that's right. There is your red line.

Below that red line and you are through to the next round.

Let's see if bhuna is right, and if it is, let's see how many said bhuna.

Well done.

Very well done, Amy. You're through to the next round.

Bhuna scores you 19. It takes your total up to 19.

-Richard.

-Very well played, Amy. Through to the second round.

It's a medium-hot curry, a bhuna.

Well done, Amy. Now then, Jane.

Liz doesn't eat curry at all

and she managed to score 13.

-Yes.

-What are you thinking, Jane?

Well, it's a lot to live up to.

-Do you eat curry?

-I do.

-Hooray.

-I've had it in India, as well.

-Very good.

-I think when I was in India,

I had one that sounded very much like mughlai!

The high scorers are Bob and Bill on 37. You're on 13.

You want to score 23 or less with this

-to make sure you're in the next round. Mughlai.

-Yes.

It has to get below that red line, then you are in the next round.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, let's see how many said mughlai.

-It's right!

-Well done.

You are through to the next round. Very well done indeed!

CHEERING

Mughlai is a pointless answer.

It adds £250 to today's jackpot. Takes the total to £3,750.

It scores you absolutely nothing. Leaves you with a total of 13 and a place in the next round.

-Richard.

-Very well done, Jane. A medium-mild curry.

The curry house version has ginger, ground almonds, yoghurt and cream.

Very good. Thank you. Remember, we are looking for types of curry.

Bill, you are the high scorers on 37,

even after two pairs have answered with their second-pass answers.

You have to try and find a really obscure answer.

As we've discovered, Dan - a bit of an expert in curry.

There's nothing to suggest that Danny

mightn't know his way around a curry menu.

-Bill.

-I think I know most of those.

Does that make it easier or harder?

Because there's most certainly an incorrect answer on that board.

I'll go for pathia.

You're going to go for pathia?

Let's see if that's correct. There's no red line for you, Bill.

You just have to hope pathia is right and that it goes all the way down.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, let's see how many said pathia.

It's right. Well done, Bill.

It could be going a long way down, I think.

Very well done! Perfect! Very good answer.

It scores you 2 and it takes your total up to 39.

Is it enough? Is it enough? Richard?

Very well played, Bill. You kept yourself in the round.

It's a traditional Parsee, a fish cooked in dark vinegar sauce.

Now then, Danny, the pressure is on you.

-Dan is feeling it. I'm feeling it. Are you feeling it?

-I am.

Good. The high scorers are Bill and Bob on 39.

If you can score 32 or less with your answer,

you're through to the next round. Otherwise we say goodbye.

I know definitely korma and jalfrezi are curries.

I'm not too sure on the other two, so it's whether I risk it.

I'll go with jalfrezi.

You're going to go with jalfrezi?

There's your red line. Red line - somehow appropriate for a jalfrezi.

Let's see if it gets you down below that red line. That's the issue.

The burning issue, we might say. Let's find out.

Is it right, and if it is, how many said jalfrezi? Good luck, Danny.

It's right.

Oh, you're through!

You are through. That scores you 29.

Takes your total up to 35.

-Jalfrezi, Richard.

-Very good answer, Danny, well done.

Korma would've lost it for you. Jalfrezi was the right answer to go for.

It's a hot curry, made hotter by cooking with green chillies.

Let's look at the answers. Korma would've been a big scorer. Would've scored you 60.

Dopiaza would've scored you...9.

And the incorrect answer is Hathi,

which is the elephant from The Jungle Book.

Thanks very much, Richard. At the end of Round One,

the losing pair, I'm sorry to say, is Bob and Bill.

Head-to-Head last time round. Curries have flushed you out.

-LAUGHTER

-And 39...

That doesn't look like a losing score to me.

Great having you on. Thanks for playing.

-Sorry, we say goodbye.

-APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's time for Round Two.

Only two pairs can make it through to the Head-to-Head,

so one team will leave us.

The category for Round Two is:

Poetry.

There you are, Jane.

Can you decide who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

And our Round Two question concerns poems and their poets.

Poems and their poets.

In this round, we're about to show you a list of famous poems.

We asked 100 people to tell us who they were written by. Richard.

We're going to show you six poems on each pass.

The more obscure the poem, the fewer points you score for giving the correct poet.

If you give an incorrect answer, you score 100 points.

See how many of the 12 you can get at home.

OK, thanks, Richard. We are looking for the authors of these famous poems.

Here's our first six:

I'll read those one more time.

So, then, Dan, there are the poems.

We want the poets who wrote them.

-You're looking quite worried.

-I can't even think of a poet!

-You can't think of a single poet?

-HE GROANS

I know Lord Byron exists and he was a poet -

-I'm going to say he EXISTED!

-Existed, yes. All right.

I'm going to say Paradise Lost by Lord Byron.

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, let's see how many knew that.

Paradise Lost. Byron.

Bad luck, Dan. That's an incorrect answer,

which means you score the maximum of 100 points for that.

-Richard.

-On the plus side, yes, Lord Byron did exist.

LAUGHTER That is confirmed.

I won't say what the answer is, just in case Liz or Amy want to have a go at that one.

OK, thanks very much, Richard. Now then, Liz...

Liz.

I shall go for The Rime of the Ancient Mariner and Coleridge.

You say Coleridge, Rime of the Ancient Mariner.

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many knew that answer.

Very well done. 18.

18 for Coleridge.

Very well done, Liz. Rime of the Ancient Mariner.

Contains the line, "Water, water, everywhere, Nor any drop to drink."

Amy, how good is your knowledge of poets and their poems?

Erm, awful.

Really? Is it better than Dan's?

No!

Do you have any idea?

I've heard of a poem, but I don't know who wrote it.

-I've heard of Jabberwocky.

-OK.

I'm going to have to guess for Paradise Lost and Hemingway.

Hemingway's Paradise Lost.

Let's see if it exists, and if it does,

let's see how many said Hemingway, Paradise Lost.

Bad luck. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

Great news for Dan and Danny,

but bad news for Emily.

You are joining them as high scorers on 100 points. Richard.

Also very bad news for John Milton, who will be turning in his grave.

-Yes. He didn't see that coming.

-He really didn't.

I suspect Ernest Hemingway and Lord Byron might also be turning in their graves.

-I don't know?

-They're not going to see this, are they?

So John Milton was the author of Paradise Lost.

Would've scored you 34 points.

Let's fill in the rest of the board. The Raven is...

I'm sure you can fill in this board. The Raven?

-Is Edgar Allan Poe.

-Yes. Thank you.

-Would've scored you 26 points.

Jabberwocky is Lewis Carroll. Would've scored you 23.

-If...?

-Rudyard Kipling.

-Absolutely. Would've scored you 22.

The best answer on the board is The Charge of the Light Brigade. Would've been the smallest score.

-It's Alfred Lord Tennyson.

-Tennyson, yes.

Would've scored 8. Well done if you got that at home.

OK. We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at the scores.

Well, Liz and Jane!

You're looking fantastic there. 18. Lovely low score.

Then Amy and Dan.

Two very high 100s there.

Well, I mean, they're 100s.

They're not high 100s. They're just 100s.

So the battle is on between Emily and Danny.

Let's come back down the line. Can the second players please take their places?

We're going to put six more poems on the board. Here they are.

We have got:

I'll read those one more time.

Now, remember, we are looking for the poets who wrote these poems.

You're trying to find the one that the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Emily, you're the high scorers, along with Danny and Dan, on 100.

We need a really low score from you, otherwise...

-..we might well be saying goodbye.

-I think we might be. Erm...

I've heard of these. I've heard of nearly all of them.

But I can't put a name to the titles.

Erm... The Owl and the Pussy-cat and I'm going to say William Blake.

The Owl and the Pussy-cat, William Blake, you're going to say.

-Yes.

-Well, you're the high scorers, so there's no red line for you.

Let's see if it's right. It needs to be a low score.

-It also needs to be correct.

-SHE GIGGLES

The Owl and the Pussy-cat, William Blake. Let's see how many people said William Blake.

Bad luck. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

It scores you the maximum 100, taking your total up to an impressive 200.

-Richard.

-Big score, but it's possible it could be a tie.

I won't give the answer, just in case Jane or Danny want to have a go.

OK, Jane. You are the low scorers on 18.

It doesn't matter what you score, you are through,

because you'll never overtake the high score of Emily and Amy on 200.

I actually know quite a few of those.

So I'm going to go for the Divine Comedy by Dante.

Very good. OK. There's no red line for you.

Let's see, though, if Dante is right,

and if it is, let's see how many people said it. Dante, the Divine Comedy.

Very well done.

Down it goes to 18.

Same score as Liz had in the first pass.

Takes your total up to 36.

-Richard.

-Well played, Jane. The inscription on the gates of hell is,

"Abandon hope all ye who enter here,"

-which we should've said at the beginning of this round.

-Yes!

Well done. You're through to the next round.

Now, Danny. Danny, Danny, can you salvage something?

I doubt it very much! Erm...

I've not really got a clue on any of them.

Apparently, there's a poet called Lord Byron,

so I'll go Ode to a Nightingale, Lord Byron.

Ode to a Nightingale, Byron, you're going to say. OK.

You want to score 99 points or less with this.

There's your red line. You have to get below that red line.

Is Byron, Ode to a Nightingale, right, and how many people said it?

No.

That's an incorrect answer, which means you score the maximum of 100 points,

taking your total up to 200.

-Richard, not much you can say.

-No. Other than, "Emily, I told you so!"

-The Head-to-Head's going to be exciting.

-Yes!

LAUGHTER

This is very exciting, as well. It's a tie.

The tied pairs have to give me one answer each.

Your scores are going to be reset to zero.

Oh, look at that!

OK. You have gone down to zero. You are now allowed to confer.

The pair that gets the lowest score...

-This is going to go on forever!

-LAUGHTER

..will go through to the Head-to-Head.

OK. Dan and Danny, you go first.

We've got nothing. Can you think of a poet?

Not other than Lord Byron.

We'll go for Lord Byron again.

Lord Byron.

-LAUGHTER

-GIRL: This is nerve-racking.

No, I'm going to say I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud.

I've heard of that one.

-Yes.

-Let's go for it.

-It's a poet and a poem, so...

-..it must be.

-OK.

-100 percent.

-You're going to say Byron.

I'd stake my life on it.

I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud, Byron. OK, erm, don't do that!

-LAUGHTER

-Er, let's see if that's right,

and if it is, how many people said Lord Byron, I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud.

-Aww!

-Bad luck. I'm afraid that's incorrect.

Now then, Emily, Amy,

please know the answer to one of these!

-I have an inkling.

-This is good.

And I can recite The Owl and the Pussy-cat, but I can't tell you who it is.

-Do you know who it is?

-No. I have an inkling on I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud.

William Wordsworth.

I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud, William Wordsworth.

-Shall we say that?

-Yes, we'll definitely say that.

Good. Very well done. You are on zero, the high scorers are Dan and Danny.

If you score under 99 points with this, basically just get it right,

you are through to the Head-to-Head.

Is it by Wordsworth? Is it? Let's find out.

LAUGHTER

Very well done!

-CHEERING

-Very well done.

That scores you 52. But most importantly, it was right.

Gets you through to the Head-to-Head. Richard.

Very well done, Amy. You've saved us a lot of bother.

I was thinking, "How are we going to get out of this...before Christmas?"

Let's fill in the rest of the board, shall we?

The Owl and the Pussy-cat was Edward Lear. Would've scored you 26 points.

Ode to a Nightingale is Keats. Would've scored 22.

-The Wasteland?

-TS Eliot.

-Exactly.

His name, of course, is an anagram of TOILETS.

LAUGHTER

Do you know To A Mouse? Best answer on the board.

-Erm, it's Robert... Rabbie Burns.

-It is.

Robert "Rabbie" Burns. 13 points. Very well done if you said that.

"Tim'rous beastie. Wee tim'rous beastie." I think.

Sorry, I'll shut up. Anyway, thanks, Richard.

So at the end of round two, the losing pair with the highest score, it's Dan and Danny.

-It's only an obscure subject that no-one knows anything about, though.

-Ah, well.

Bad luck. I'm afraid this is also the last time we see you.

We haven't seen you at your best. You've been ill-served by the categories.

But it's been great having you on. Thank you for playing.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining pairs, things are going to get even more exciting as we enter the Head-to-Head.

Well done, Liz and Jane, Emily and Amy. You've made it through to the Head-to-Head.

Only one pair can make it through to the final and play for the jackpot, which currently stands at:

CHEERING

You're going to go head-to-head, best of three.

For each question, each pair needs to give me just one answer.

You are now allowed to confer.

Come up with an answer that scores less than the others and you win that question.

The first to reach best of three will play for today's jackpot.

Let's play Pointless.

Here is your first question. We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many colours that feature on a Scandinavian flag as they could.

-Richard.

-We're looking for any colour

that appears on the flags of either Norway, Sweden or Denmark.

OK. Norway, Sweden or Denmark. Colours on their flags.

Liz and Jane, because you've played best, you get to go first.

We are looking for colours on the Scandinavian flags.

THEY WHISPER

-OK, we have an answer?

-We do.

-Shall I say it?

-Yes.

-Yellow.

Yellow. Liz and Jane are taking yellow.

Emily and Amy, any other colours on the Scandinavian flags?

We're thinking between two. Erm...

We do know some flags, quite a few, but this is one that we're not 100 percent.

We're going to have to guess... Was it red and white?

-Is that...

-Shall we guess red?

-Yes. We'll guess red.

-Red?

-Yes.

We have yellow from Liz and Jane, we have red from Emily and Amy.

Let's take them in order. Yellow.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many said it.

It's right.

50.

50 points for yellow.

Emily and Amy, let's see how many people said red.

67.

So after our first question, Liz and Jane are up 1-0. Richard.

Tough luck, Emily and Amy. Well played, Liz and Jane. It was an unbeatable score, yellow.

Let's take a look at all four of them.

Yellow scored you 50,

red - 67,

blue - 70, white - 71.

Norway, red, white and blue,

Denmark, red and white, Sweden, blue and yellow.

A Danish flag fell from heaven in 1219, according to legend.

-From heaven?

-Yes.

-Heaven designed their flag.

Not that much of a palette up in heaven, then?

It's 1219, so it's one of their early flags.

Thanks, Richard. Here is your second question.

Liz and Jane, if you win this question, you are through to the final.

Emily and Amy, if they win this question, they are through to the final.

You know what you have to do. We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Dad's Army actors as they could.

Dad's Army actors. Richard.

We're looking for any of the seven actors

who played the core Home Guard at Walmington-on-Sea.

We won't accept Colin Bean, because he wasn't in it long enough.

We're looking for the seven actors from the first series

who played the core members of the Walmington-on-Sea Home Guard.

Thanks very much, Richard.

So, Emily and Amy, you get to go first this time.

-Any idea?

-I think I know one, but it's probably the most popular.

I think his name is Arthur Lowe.

Arthur Lowe? OK. You're going to say Arthur Lowe.

Liz and Jane...

-Ian Lavender.

-Yes.

-JAMES Le Mesurier.

Yes. There was, er, a butcher, Jones.

-What's his name?

-Clive... No.

-Dunn.

-BOTH: Clive Dunn.

-The spiv.

-I can't think what his name is.

James somebody?

-Let's go with somebody.

-OK, shall we say Ian Lavender?

Ian Lavender.

We have Arthur Lowe and Ian Lavender in the order they were given.

Emily and Amy, you have to win this to stay in the game.

Let's see if it's right and how many people said Arthur Lowe.

Very well done. It's right.

Down it comes. 43!

43 for Arthur Lowe. Liz and Jane, you have gone with Ian Lavender.

If you win this point, you are through to the final.

Let's see if Ian Lavender's right and how many people said it.

You've done it! There we are. 30 against 43.

Very well done, Liz and Jane.

Ian Lavender a more obscure answer, which wins you the points.

You are through to the final, 2-0.

-Richard.

-Unlucky, Emily and Amy. Good answer with Arthur Lowe.

Let's take a look at them. There'll be some familiar names.

The spiv, Private Walker, was played by James Beck.

If John Laurie was on Emily and Amy's team he'd be saying, "We're doomed."

Arnold Ridley was Private Godfrey.

Ian Lavender, who was Pike, on 30.

Clive Dunn, Corporal Jones, 43.

Arthur Lowe also on 43. He was Captain Mainwaring, of course.

And Sergeant Wilson, right at the top there,

John Le Mesurier.

The losing pair at the end of the Head-to-Head is Emily and Amy.

Two quite tough categories for you, I'm guessing.

You came up with two correct answers.

They were just high scorers, that's the only problem.

-We will see you again next time. Meanwhile, thanks for playing.

-BOTH: Thank you.

For Liz and Jane, it's time for our Pointless final and the chance to win our jackpot of £3,750.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Liz and Jane.

You've seen off all the competition to win our coveted Pointless trophy.

BOTH: Hooray!

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

The jackpot stands at £3,750.

CHEERING

To win the money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer that no-one could think of.

-We've had two on the show today. You came up with one of them with mughlai.

-I did.

You only need to find one more and you go home with that money.

You've got to choose a category and you can choose from these three:

THEY LAUGH

Football, opera, fashion.

-I don't know much about any of them, really.

-No.

-But fashion?

-Lesser of the...!

-I think fashion's the lesser of three evils.

-OK.

Fashion. Right, let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Designer of the Year winners as they could.

-Designer of the Year, Richard?

-We're looking for any winner of this award,

which is awarded annually by the British Fashion Council.

Anyone who's won that award from 1984,

all the way through to 2010.

Thank you. You have up to one minute to come up with three answers,

and all you need, to win that £3,750

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

Your 60 seconds start now.

-Can you think of any designers at all?

-Dress designers or shoes?

-Fashion.

-Fashion. Erm...

-My mind's gone a complete blank.

-Mine, too!

-I can think of Vivienne Westwood, but she's probably before then.

-She's still popular.

-Anybody else?

-Erm...

-Erm... Galtieri?

-Yes.

-Galtieri.

-Yves St Laurent. No, they do makeup.

-That's makeup.

-Who else?

-Er...

-What about Stella McCartney?

-Stella McCartney.

-Yes, I think they're the three.

-I think so, yes.

We're stuck with the three that we've been able to think of!

OK, you've got three. You're happy with those?

-You don't want to go any further?

-I don't think we'll think of any more.

OK. We'll stop the clock. Very good. You've come up with three answers before your time is up.

We were looking for Designer of the Year winners. I need those three answers.

-Stella McCartney.

-Stella McCartney.

-Vivienne Westwood.

-Vivienne Westwood.

And John Galtieri. If I'm saying it properly.

John Galtieri. You're going to submit Galtieri.

OK. Of those three,

which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

I think they're all pretty useless.

-Stella McCartney?

-Stella McCartney.

Stella McCartney last. Which shall we put first?

-Your least likely.

-Put Vivienne Westwood first.

-Vivienne Westwood.

And the one we can't say in the middle.

Galtieri in the middle! OK. There we are.

Let's put those up on the board in that order.

Here they are. Vivienne Westwood,

John Galtieri and Stella McCartney.

There they are.

We were looking for winners of Designer of the Year.

This was your least confident answer. You only need one of these to be pointless

to win that jackpot of £3,750.

Let's see if Vivienne Westwood is right.

If she is a correct answer, let's see how many people said it.

It has to be right and pointless for you to win that jackpot.

Vivienne Westwood?

-Well done, it's right.

-That's a surprise!

-Very good.

Down it goes, into the 50s. 40s. 30s.

It was a good answer.

-16!

-That's a surprise!

-Better than I thought!

-Yes!

Not a bad answer. That would be a fantastic answer in normal play.

Unfortunately, it's not pointless. At this stage, we need pointless answers.

You only have two chances left to win today's jackpot.

HE SIGHS

Let's see if your next answer is correct.

John Galtieri.

What would you do with £3,750?

-Er, holidays, I think.

-I think so.

I think it'd be nice to book a great big house somewhere, where the whole family could go.

-All four sisters, do you think?

-Yes.

-Plus Mum.

-Plus Mum.

-And children.

-Everybody else!

-I'm guessing that's quite a crowd.

-BOTH: Yes.

-It is.

-Yes. Very good. Good luck.

OK, John Galtieri is your second submission.

It has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot.

For £3,750, let's see if it's a correct answer, and if it is, how many people said John Galtieri.

Bad luck. Unfortunately, that's an incorrect answer.

You only have one chance left to win today's jackpot.

-This is your best shot, though.

-We hope so!

-We'll see.

We are looking for winners of Designer of the Year.

Your third answer is Stella McCartney.

You said this was the answer you were most confident with.

It has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot of £3,750.

Let's see if Stella McCartney is right, and if it is,

let's see how many people said for Designer of the Year Stella McCartney.

Well, it's jumped the first hurdle.

It has to go all the way down to zero

if you're going to win that jackpot of £3,750.

-THEY GROAN

-Bad luck!

18 people...

..knew Stella McCartney.

Unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer

so you don't win today's jackpot, which rolls over to the next show.

You've been amazing contestants and you get to take home our Pointless trophy.

BOTH: Thank you. APPLAUSE

Now then, Richard.

Unlucky, Liz and Jane. You played ever so well across both shows.

-John Galtieri - I think you may have been thinking of John Galliano?

-Yes.

He would've scored you 1 point.

-BOTH: Oh!

-Probably not worth the heartache.

Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers. I hope you don't recognise them.

Betty Jackson,

who designed the outrageous costumes on Absolutely Fabulous.

Christopher Bailey has won twice as Chief Creative Officer of Burberry.

Giles Deacon, who's got his own clothing range - Giles. All pointless answers.

-Hussein Chalayan won in '99 and 2000.

-Jasper Conran.

Jasper Conran, also a pointless answer.

Katharine Hamnett, famous for her sloganeering T-shirts.

She was a pointless answer.

Luella Bartley won it in 2008. Rifat Ozbek won it twice, as well.

The winners in 1989 were Workers For Freedom. Well done if you got any of those.

We do have to say goodbye, Liz and Jane. It's been great having you. Thanks for playing.

-It's been lovely.

-BOTH: Thank you.

Nobody won our jackpot, so it rolls over. On the next show,

we'll be playing for £4,750.

-AUDIENCE: Oooh!

-Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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