Episode 14 Pointless


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Transcript


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CHEERING / APPLAUSE

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Thank you. Hello. I'm Alexander Armstrong,

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and welcome to Pointless, where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

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Let's meet today's players.

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And first we welcome back Paul and Nick.

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You were on the show last time. Everyone gets two chances,

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and this is your second and last chance.

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Remind us what happened.

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-Oh, well, picked a topic I don't like - football.

-Oh, dear.

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Just couldn't think of anything. Totally blank.

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So now you're going to atone for that performance.

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What's going to come up, Nick, that will be a chance for you

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-to dazzle us?

-As long as it's not football, we'll be fine.

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Any general knowledge... Paul's very good at that.

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We have quizzes all the time. Christmas time... Competitive streak you wouldn't believe.

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Partners say, "It's only a game." "No, it's not."

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-Taken very seriously.

-It's great having you back. Best of luck.

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-I hope we'll have you for much longer this time.

-So do we.

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Next we welcome Lynne and Glenys.

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How do you two know each other?

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We met about 11 years ago, when I was lady captain at a golf club

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that we're no longer members at, and Glenys came along to join,

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and we just became really firm friends.

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What would you like to see come up? What would be a cracking subject?

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Anything that's been on the programmes before would be helpful,

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the ones I've watched, and I've watched lots of them.

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I am a bit sad. I've got it on series link,

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because I haven't been in lately. I've been playing golf.

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So basically your specialist topic is Pointless.

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-Pointless.

-OK. Very good.

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-Glenys, what would be great for you?

-General knowledge, I'd really like,

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-or travel or geography.

-OK.

-I've travelled a lot.

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I've been really lucky. My daughter worked for a well known airline

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for ten years, long-haul, so I got to travel quite a lot of the world with her.

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-And my son lives in LA.

-Oh, perfect! Perfect excuse.

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Let's hope all of those things come up.

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-Thank you.

-Great to have you on the show.

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Next we welcome Diane and Marc. How do you two know each other?

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About four years ago, I was fed up of working as a counsellor

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on my own, and Marc came to join me. And we've been friends ever since,

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-We've known each other four years.

-Whereabouts do you work?

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-We work in a sixth-form college in Huddersfield.

-In Huddersfield?

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And I moonlight as a sex therapist.

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LAUGHTER

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Slightly unfortunate choice of words there, Diane, but...

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Yeah. OK. And Marc, what do you do in Huddersfield?

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-You're a counsellor?

-With Diane, yeah.

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-OK. Any moonlighting from you?

-No.

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No. What would you like to see come up this afternoon?

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What sorts of things do you like to do?

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I guess I'd like '60s French music to come up.

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-That would be my speciality.

-'60s French music?

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-Fingers crossed, yeah.

-Yeah.

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-Is it on?

-Yes. It's a '60s French-music special, Marc.

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Great. I'm in.

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Diane, while Marc's listening to his '60s music,

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-what do you like to do?

-I really like to listen to Star Wars music.

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Star Wars. I like to sort of, you know, chill out.

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My kids will be laughing their heads off as I'm saying this.

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-Star Wars.

-Yeah. I like Star Wars.

-She's a sci-fi nerd.

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-I'm a bit of a geek.

-Are you?

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-But Star Wars is the acme of all science fiction?

-Absolutely.

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-It's great to have you on the show. Very, very best of luck.

-Thank you.

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Finally we welcome back Ali and Lucy. You were here last time.

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-Remind us how you did.

-We did pretty well.

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We got to the head-to-head, but it all folded after that.

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-Warsaw Pact was unfortunate.

-Yeah. Rising Damp.

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Rising Damp was unlucky, I think.

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Lucy, obviously last time we heard all about Ali's bank.

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In fact, not just "about" - we heard Ali's band as well.

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What do you like to do? You're a student at York.

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Yeah. I'm studying English literature,

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so I'm hoping something with literature comes up, obviously.

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Very good. Ali, what would you love to see come up?

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-What would be a brilliant category?

-I'm pretty strong on UK geography.

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-I've been all over the British Isles.

-In a minibus.

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-Yeah.

-I know some odd places,

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and I think I'm quite strong on food and drink.

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I say that, and it's going to come up and I'll embarrass myself, but...

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Well, we'll find out soon enough. It's great to have you back.

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We'll find out more about all of you later.

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There's only one person left for met to introduce.

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In the bath of obscurity, he's the Pointless rubber duck.

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-He is my Pointless friend. He's Richard.

-Hiya.

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How are you?

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-Good afternoon to you.

-Very good afternoon to you too.

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Got two returning pairs today. They had differing fortunes last time.

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Paul and Nick were unlucky, got knocked out in the first round,

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and Ali and Lucy got all the way to the head-to-head.

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Had a tough head-to-head, but they've proved themselves.

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It should be a tough show. Even better for Ali,

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the first category, if he likes UK geography,

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-is right up his street.

-Very good indeed.

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We put all our questions to 100 people before the show,

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but this is Pointless, so we're after the answers they didn't get.

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To stay in the game with a chance to win our jackpot,

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our players need to score as few points as they can.

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Everyone's trying to find a pointless answer,

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an answer none of our 100 people gave, and each time that happens,

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we will add £250 to the jackpot. Nobody won the jackpot last time,

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so we add another £1,000 to that. So today's jackpot starts off...

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at £3,500.

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AUDIENCE CHEERS

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Right! Let's play Pointless.

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In the first round, each of you must give me one answer,

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and you cannot confer with your partner.

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The team with the highest score at the end will be eliminated.

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OK. Our first category this afternoon is...

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..islands. Decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second.

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And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

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OK. Let's find out what the question is.

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We gave 100 people 100 seconds

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to name as many Hebridean islands as they could.

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Yeah. The correct answers in this round will all be islands

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in the Inner or Outer Hebrides.

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OK. Thank you very much, Richard.

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Now, before the show you all drew lots,

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and Paul and Nick, you get to go first.

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You'll be pleased to hear we're going to give you a choice

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-of seven possible...

-Phew. LAUGHTER

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"Phew!" We'll give you a choice of seven possible answers

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on the board in each pass. Your first set reads like this.

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At least one of those answers is Pointless,

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but be very careful indeed, because at least one of them is wrong.

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Pick an incorrect one, and you will score the maximum of 100 points.

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So, Paul, you're in a better position now I've told you...

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Yeah, because I don't know any of them except one, I recognise.

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-Right.

-Never heard of any of the others.

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-OK.

-Oh, maybe two.

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Have you ever been up there, to the Hebrides?

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I've been on one of them. I'm going to take a little gamble.

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Just trying to read what Nick thinks of that.

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I don't think he knows any of them either!

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PAUL LAUGHS

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I'm going to go with Corncrake.

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Corncrake, you are saying? There it is, one up from the bottom.

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-What do you think, Nick?

-I've got no idea,

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-so I guess it's as good as any.

-Good luck. Let's see if it's right,

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and if it is, how many people said Corncrake.

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Oh!

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Bad luck, Paul!

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-Not another one!

-Unfortunately Corncrake is incorrect,

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which means it scores you the maximum of 100 points.

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-Bad luck. Richard?

-Yeah. Sorry, Paul.

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Corncrake is a rare Scottish bird, not an island, I'm afraid.

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-PAUL SIGHS

-Here we go again.

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There we are. Now, then, Lynne. Lynne, we come to you.

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-I think you might know quite a few of these.

-Not a clue!

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-Not a clue?

-Never been that far up.

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Well, maybe there was only one incorrect answer on the board.

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-Maybe.

-And maybe Paul has just mine-swept for you.

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-Maybe.

-Maybe.

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There is most definitely one pointless answer on the board.

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I like the sound of...Barra.

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Barra.

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-Don't know whether it's there or not.

-Is that a complete guess,

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-or do you think you've heard of it?

-I don't think I have.

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OK. Barra.

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Let's see if Barra's right, and if it is, how many people said Barra.

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-It is right!

-Good one. Yes, well done.

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-22 for Barra.

-I'm happy with that.

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-Well done.

-22. Not a bad score.

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-Richard, Barra.

-Well done. Barra's in the Outer Hebrides,

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one of the larger, better-known islands in the Outer Hebrides.

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OK. Now, then, Diane, we are looking for Hebridean islands.

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-What do you think?

-Well, I know one,

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and the other one's gone,

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so I'm going to go for one I think is right - Lismore,

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-but I don't... Yeah, go on.

-Lismore, you're saying.

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Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people said Lismore.

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It's right!

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-Yeah!

-Not only right!

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-CHEERING / APPLAUSE

-It's a pointless answer.

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That means it adds £250 to today's jackpot,

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and takes the total up to £3,750.

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And it scores you nothing. Very well done. Richard?

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Well played. Great start to the show. It's in the Inner Hebrides, Lismore.

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It's got a population of about 150 people.

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Hello, if you're watching.

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THEY LAUGH

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Ali, we're looking for Hebridean islands.

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I'm certain about one. I'm pretty sure about another,

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and the other two I've got no idea about.

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So I've got... Skye is a dead cert for me,

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and Muck is the one I'm pretty sure about.

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I'm not sure about the other two, so I'm going to go for Muck.

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I'm sort of quietly confident that that's...that's, er, one.

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-What do you think, Lucy?

-I trust your judgement.

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-Thank you.

-You know Scotland.

-Muck.

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Muck.

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-Did Elliot Minor play Muck ever?

-LUCY LAUGHS

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We never got that far. One day, maybe.

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One day. One day.

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Let's see if Muck's right, and if it is, how many people said Muck.

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That's right. Well done, Ali.

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Come on, come on, come on, come on.

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Very, very well done.

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-APPLAUSE

-Four points for Muck.

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That's pretty good.

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-Richard?

-Yeah, very well played, Ali.

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Gaelic for "Isle of Pigs". Let's look at the rest of the board.

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-Which is the place you've been to, Paul, on there?

-Skye.

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You could've said it. Skye would've scored you 55 points.

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Of Caboc and Grimsay, one is correct and one is pointless.

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I think Grimsay is right, because there are a few that end A-Y.

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Well done if you said Grimsay at home. That is a pointless answer.

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And Caboc is a Scottish cheese, so that's an incorrect answer.

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-It's a delicious incorrect answer.

-Very good. Thank you, Richard.

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Let's take a look at the scores. Diane and Marc looking very strong

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with a beautiful score of zero, then we go up to Ali and Lucy on four,

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and then up to Lynne and Glenys on 22...

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and then up quite a long way to Paul and Nick on 100.

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-Nick, you have your work cut out.

-To say the least.

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To say the least. Good luck with that.

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OK. Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

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OK. We're going to put seven more answers on the board.

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We are looking for Hebridean islands, and here we go.

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Again I can tell you at least one of those answers is pointless,

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and at least one of those answers is incorrect,

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so try and avoid those incorrect ones.

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Now, Lucy, Ali has set you up fabulously there with Muck.

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-Yeah.

-You're on four. The high scorers are Nick and Paul on 100.

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If you can score 95 or less, you are through to the next round.

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I'm trying to look for ones that sound Gaelic.

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I know Irish Gaelic. I don't know how similar it is.

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And there's one that rings a bell, but I don't know if it's...

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if it's because it's an island, or if I know it from somewhere else.

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-How do you know Irish Gaelic?

-I went to school in Ireland,

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-secondary school.

-I see. So you lived in Ireland?

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-Yeah, eight years.

-Eight years.

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I'm going to guess, because we're in quite a comfortable position,

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-so I'm going to say Mull.

-You're going to say Mull?

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Sounds good to me. Mull. Here is your red line.

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Below that red line, you are through to the next round.

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Very best of luck. Is Mull right? How many people said it?

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It's right. Very well done, Lucy. You're through.

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-30 for Mull.

-APPLAUSE

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Very good. That takes your total up to 34.

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Richard?

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Well played, Lucy. Safely through with Mull.

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One of the better known of the Hebridean islands.

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Marc...

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-How well did Diane do?

-Brilliantly.

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-Brilliantly!

-Absolutely. I don't know how you pronounce it,

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-but I'm going to go for Gigha.

-You're going to go for Gigha.

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-If that's how you say it, yeah.

-Very good. There is Gigha,

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third one down. Let's see if that's right, and if it is,

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let's see how many people said Gigha. There's your red line.

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It's right.

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Not just right!

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APPLAUSE

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That's pointless! It adds £250 to today's jackpot,

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takes the total up to £4,000.

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It scores you nothing, and it leaves your total at nothing.

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-Very well done. Richard?

-Blimey, Marc and Diane!

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Look at Diane's poker face there!

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Gives nothing away, doesn't it?

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Gigha was bought in 1944 by Sir James Horlick,

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of the hot-drink company.

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-Glenys!

-Hmm...

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Remember, we are looking for Hebridean islands.

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I really liked the answers in the first round.

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I did know four of them. But I somehow think...

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I remember hearing the shipping forecasts,

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because I'm rather ancient, and I think Tiree is an island.

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-Tiree. It's definitely something.

-It is definitely something.

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It rings a very strong bell. Tiree!

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-Is it a Hebridean island?

-Hope so. I hope so.

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Oh, I hope so too. The high scorers are Nick and Paul on 100.

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If you can score 77 or less with Tiree,

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you are through to the next round. There is your red line.

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Let's see if Tiree's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

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Tiree.

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Well done! It's right, and you are through to the next round.

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Brilliant.

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Oh, it's a brilliant score!

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Four for Tiree. Takes your total up to 26.

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-Richard?

-Yeah, very well done, Glenys.

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Tiree is one of Britain's sunniest places in the summer.

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The whole of the Hebrides, very beautiful.

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-It's worth a visit. Have you been?

-Oh, and how! I love it.

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Wonderful, aren't they?

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-Nick, I tell you some terrible news.

-Oh, no. What?

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I have awful news for you. I'm afraid your high score of 100

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is unbeatable. You haven't even given your answer,

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and already you are the high scorers.

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Some very good scores before me. I can't complain.

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That's true. I tell you what you can do, though.

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Your legacy to this show

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could be to add £250 to the jackpot by finding a pointless answer.

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-I think you can do it.

-I'm glad you do, because I'm not too sure.

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You're the last person to have this board. Talk us through.

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I'll have to have a shot in the dark. I don't think Rum's one.

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It probably is. St Clair or Eigg, I'm thinking of, to be honest.

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It might even be Summerisle. I don't think Rum's one,

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but who knows? And then the Gaelic theme,

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-if I go with Eigg...

-You're going to go with Eigg?

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Yeah, why not? "Eigg" on our face. We might as well carry on.

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-HE LAUGHS

-OK. Eigg, you are saying.

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There's no red line for you cos you are the high scorers.

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Let's see if it's right. Eigg. How many people said it?

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Well done, Nick. It's right.

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Go on. Come for nothing.

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-Go on.

-Let's see. Let's see.

-Go on!

0:17:330:17:35

-Oh, 11!

-Well done.

0:17:350:17:37

-APPLAUSE

-11 for Eigg.

-I'm happy with that.

0:17:370:17:41

Takes your total up to 111.

0:17:410:17:44

A nice way to finish, Nick. Well done.

0:17:440:17:46

Long associated with the Clan MacDonald, the Isle of Eigg.

0:17:460:17:50

Let's take a look through the rest of the board.

0:17:500:17:52

Rum is a Hebridean island, but would have scored you nine points.

0:17:520:17:57

Slightly better answer. And those other two, Xander?

0:17:570:18:00

Well, we all know the Isle of St Clair.

0:18:000:18:03

Yeah. That's an incorrect answer. She used to be on The Generation Game.

0:18:030:18:07

-And Summerisle?

-That's definitely an island, yes.

0:18:070:18:10

That's right, yeah, Summerisle.

0:18:100:18:13

-Oh, no!

-Summerisle is the island on The Wicker Man.

0:18:140:18:18

Summerisle. Sorry about that. It's an incorrect answer.

0:18:180:18:22

Thank you very much, Richard! At the end of round one,

0:18:230:18:26

the losing pair with the highest score again, Paul and Nick!

0:18:260:18:29

It's just not right. I was thinking at least head-to-head.

0:18:290:18:32

-We will be head-to-head when we get out.

-Oh, yeah!

0:18:320:18:36

It has been lovely having you on the show.

0:18:360:18:38

We haven't seen nearly enough of you, and we have to say goodbye now.

0:18:380:18:42

Great contestants. Thank you.

0:18:420:18:44

APPLAUSE

0:18:440:18:46

But for the remaining three pairs, now it's time for round two.

0:18:460:18:50

There's only room for two pairs in the head-to-head,

0:18:560:18:59

so one of these pairs will be leaving at the end of this round.

0:18:590:19:03

Our round-two category this afternoon is...

0:19:030:19:06

TV. Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

0:19:060:19:09

who's going to go second.

0:19:090:19:11

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

0:19:110:19:15

And our round-two question this afternoon concerns...

0:19:180:19:21

TV shows and their spin-offs.

0:19:210:19:24

We're going to show you six spin-offs on each pass.

0:19:240:19:27

We asked 100 people which show did they spin off from.

0:19:270:19:30

The more obscure ones will score fewer points.

0:19:300:19:32

An incorrect answer will score 100 points.

0:19:320:19:35

There's 12 spin-offs in all. See how many you get at home.

0:19:350:19:38

Thanks very much, Richard. We are looking for the original TV shows

0:19:380:19:41

of which these are TV spin-offs. And we have got...

0:19:410:19:45

So, there they are. Now, Glenys... Now, then, Glenys.

0:20:010:20:05

What's this like as a category for you?

0:20:050:20:07

Not very good. Um... I know a couple of them,

0:20:070:20:12

but I don't want to go for them

0:20:120:20:14

because I think they might be the sort of obvious answers.

0:20:140:20:18

I'm probably going to go for an obvious answer anyway,

0:20:180:20:22

but I'm going to go for, The Colbys was a spin-off from Dallas.

0:20:220:20:26

The Colbys, Dallas. Let's see if that's right,

0:20:260:20:28

and if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer.

0:20:280:20:32

-Oh!

-Oh, God!

-Bad luck, Glenys!

0:20:320:20:35

I shouldn't have said that. Sorry!

0:20:350:20:37

You clearly shouldn't have said that.

0:20:370:20:39

That is an incorrect answer,

0:20:390:20:42

which I'm afraid means you score the maximum of 100 points,

0:20:420:20:45

-I'm sorry to say. Richard?

-I won't give the correct answer,

0:20:450:20:48

just in case Marc or Lucy want to have a go at the same one.

0:20:480:20:51

Marc, we're looking for the TV shows of which these show are spin-offs.

0:20:510:20:55

You and Diane scored a double pointless in the first round.

0:20:550:21:00

Let's see if you can follow that up with another super-low score.

0:21:000:21:03

-Do you watch a lot of television?

-I watch quite a lot, yeah.

0:21:030:21:06

-So this is a good topic?

-I know a few of those up there.

-OK.

0:21:060:21:09

Just depends on how confident I'm going to be

0:21:090:21:12

on going for the one I'm less sure about.

0:21:120:21:15

Maybe Glenys's high score might give you a boost of confidence.

0:21:150:21:19

I'm going to go for my favourite TV programme in the '80s,

0:21:190:21:22

and the spin-off of The Colbys came from Dynasty.

0:21:220:21:26

Dynasty. Yes.

0:21:260:21:29

There you are, Glenys.

0:21:290:21:31

Dynasty. Let's see if that's right. The Colbys, Dynasty.

0:21:310:21:34

There we are. Well done, Marc.

0:21:350:21:37

27.

0:21:410:21:42

-APPLAUSE

-Not a bad score at all,

0:21:420:21:46

-for Dynasty. Richard?

-Yeah. Well played, Marc.

0:21:460:21:48

Tough luck, Glenys. It was Dynasty.

0:21:480:21:51

The Colbys starred Charlton Heston,

0:21:510:21:53

and ended after two series with an alien abduction.

0:21:530:21:56

-I had no idea!

-Mm, yeah. It was quite something.

0:21:560:21:59

Very good. Great answer, Marc. So, Lucy, we come to you.

0:21:590:22:03

You're the last person to have this board,

0:22:030:22:05

so talk us through all the answers you can give.

0:22:050:22:08

I only know one, I'm afraid, but I do know it for certain,

0:22:080:22:12

so I'm going to have to, even though it's obvious,

0:22:120:22:14

say The Green Green Grass and Only Fools And Horses.

0:22:140:22:17

Only Fools And Horses, you are saying.

0:22:170:22:20

Let's see if that's right, and how many people knew that answer.

0:22:200:22:24

There we are. It's right.

0:22:240:22:26

46.

0:22:280:22:30

-APPLAUSE

-Not a terrible score.

0:22:300:22:33

46 for Only Fools And Horses.

0:22:330:22:35

Well done, Lucy. A nice safe score. Featured Marlene and Boyce.

0:22:350:22:39

Let's take a look at the others. The biggest answer of all is Lewis,

0:22:390:22:43

a spin-off from Inspector Morse. That would have scored 67 points.

0:22:430:22:46

-Tucker's Luck is a spin-off...

-From Grange Hill.

-Exactly right,

0:22:460:22:49

with Todd Carty. 38 points.

0:22:490:22:52

George And Mildred, slightly tougher one.

0:22:520:22:54

Spin-off from Man About The House. Well done if you got that at home.

0:22:540:22:58

Would have scored 17. The best answer is Rhoda,

0:22:580:23:00

more famous in America than here.

0:23:000:23:02

It was a spin-off of The Mary Tyler Moore Show.

0:23:020:23:05

Scored four points. That's the best answer on the board.

0:23:050:23:08

We're halfway through the round, so let's take a look at the scores.

0:23:080:23:13

Marc, you've done it again - the lowest score on the pass, 27.

0:23:130:23:17

Then up to 46, Lucy and Ali.

0:23:170:23:19

And then Glenys and Lynne. I'm afraid an incorrect answer there.

0:23:190:23:23

That scored you 100.

0:23:230:23:25

So, Lynne, you have your work cut out in the next pass.

0:23:250:23:28

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

0:23:280:23:33

OK. We'll put another six answers on the board,

0:23:360:23:38

and we have got...

0:23:380:23:40

Remember, we are looking for the original TV shows

0:23:540:23:57

of which these are spin-offs,

0:23:570:24:00

and you're trying to find the one the fewest of our 100 people knew.

0:24:000:24:03

Now, Ali...

0:24:030:24:05

Now, then, Ali, Lucy's left you in a pretty comfortable position.

0:24:050:24:08

Lynne and Glenys are the high scorers on 100.

0:24:080:24:11

If you can score 53 or less with your answer,

0:24:110:24:14

you are definitely through to the next round.

0:24:140:24:16

I don't think I'm going to be able to. I literally know none of them.

0:24:160:24:20

TV is one of the weakest things I... I watch reality TV, and that's as far as it goes.

0:24:200:24:25

Lucy is desperately trying to beam answers into you.

0:24:250:24:30

I bet she knows at least half of them, if not more.

0:24:300:24:33

I'm going to go for Torchwood. I've got a vague idea of what it's like.

0:24:330:24:37

I'm going to go for... Inspector Morse.

0:24:370:24:40

Another Inspector Morse spin-off.

0:24:430:24:45

-LAUGHTER

-Er, Torchwood...

0:24:450:24:47

-What are you thinking, Lucy?

-I know the answer, so...

0:24:470:24:51

You know the answer, yeah. There you are.

0:24:510:24:54

There's your red line. Below that, through to the head-to-head.

0:24:540:24:57

Torchwood, Inspector Morse, you're saying.

0:24:570:24:59

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many people knew that.

0:24:590:25:03

Bad luck, Ali. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer,

0:25:040:25:07

which means you score the maximum of 100 points,

0:25:070:25:10

taking your total up to 146.

0:25:100:25:11

-Richard?

-Yes, it is an incorrect answer.

0:25:110:25:14

There was an episode of Morse where he used a torch in a wood.

0:25:140:25:18

-THEY LAUGH

-That's what I was thinking.

0:25:180:25:20

I won't give the answer in case Diane or Lynne want to have a go at it.

0:25:200:25:24

Diane, remember, we're looking for the TV shows

0:25:240:25:27

of which these shows are spin-offs.

0:25:270:25:29

The high scorers are Ali and Lucy on 146.

0:25:290:25:33

You are through to the head-to-head.

0:25:330:25:35

Whatever happens, you'll never overtake that score.

0:25:350:25:38

Bearing that in mind, why not see if you can find a low-scoring answer

0:25:400:25:45

-on this board?

-Because I don't know any!

0:25:450:25:47

I think the only two I know are high-scoring.

0:25:470:25:51

I'm going to go... Frasier, I think, was from Cheers.

0:25:510:25:55

-Frasier, Cheers, you are saying.

-Yeah. I think I know that one,

0:25:550:26:00

-for a change.

-Very good. Well, there's no red line for you.

0:26:000:26:04

You are through to the next round whatever happens.

0:26:040:26:07

So let's see if that's right. Frasier, Cheers.

0:26:070:26:10

Well done.

0:26:100:26:12

43! Not a bad score.

0:26:140:26:16

Takes your total up to 70.

0:26:160:26:19

-Richard?

-Well played, Diane. Safely through.

0:26:200:26:23

Frasier Crane leaves the bar in Boston and moves to Seattle

0:26:230:26:26

to be a radio counsellor.

0:26:260:26:28

-Very good. Now, then, Lynne...

-Yes.

-It's all in your hands.

0:26:280:26:31

-I know.

-The high scorers are Ali and Lucy on 146.

0:26:310:26:35

If you score 45 or less with this,

0:26:350:26:37

you stay and are through to the head-to-head.

0:26:370:26:40

You're the last person to have this board,

0:26:400:26:43

-so talk us through it. Is this a good subject for you?

-Not really.

0:26:430:26:46

I knew Frazier. I think I know Torchwood.

0:26:460:26:49

Knots Landing could be the one that Glenys said the last time.

0:26:490:26:53

Benson I can see, but I can't see the programme before Benson,

0:26:530:26:59

so I'm going to have to go with Torchwood,

0:26:590:27:01

and I think it's going to be a lot more than 46, if it's right.

0:27:010:27:05

So I'm going to say Doctor Who.

0:27:050:27:08

Torchwood, Doctor Who. Were you anywhere near saying that, Ali?

0:27:080:27:11

I'm going to say that, honestly, that crossed my mind.

0:27:110:27:14

I'm not lying, but... Um, I think it's right.

0:27:140:27:18

The question is, will it go below 45?

0:27:180:27:21

-I think not.

-45 or below.

0:27:210:27:25

Only one way to find out.

0:27:250:27:27

Let's see. Is Torchwood, Doctor Who right,

0:27:270:27:30

and if it is, how many people said it?

0:27:300:27:32

There's your red line. Below that red line,

0:27:320:27:35

you are in the head-to-head. Above that red line,

0:27:350:27:38

Ali and Lucy are in the head-to-head.

0:27:380:27:42

-Oh!

-APPLAUSE

0:27:460:27:48

Bad luck, Lynne. I'm afraid that scores you 67,

0:27:490:27:52

which takes your total up to an unbeatable 167.

0:27:520:27:55

-Richard?

-Yeah. Big sigh of relief from Ali there.

0:27:550:27:59

Torchwood. It's an anagram of Doctor Who, as well.

0:27:590:28:01

Let's look at the rest of the board. If you had given the same answer,

0:28:010:28:05

if you'd said Dallas, it would have scored you a much lower 38 points.

0:28:050:28:10

Mork And Mindy was a spin-off from Happy Days,

0:28:100:28:14

believe it or not. That would have scored you 11 points.

0:28:140:28:17

It became as famous as Happy Days.

0:28:170:28:19

Benson was a spin-off from Soap. Would have scored you seven.

0:28:190:28:22

And the best answer of all, very obscure -

0:28:220:28:24

a spin-off from The Cosby Show, A Different World.

0:28:240:28:27

Would have scored three. Very well done if you got that one.

0:28:270:28:31

OK. Thank you very much, Richard. At the end of round two,

0:28:310:28:34

the losing pair with the highest score, I'm afraid, Lynne and Glenys.

0:28:340:28:38

It was quite tough, this. A lot of American shows there.

0:28:380:28:41

My favourite's Frasier. I still watch that now.

0:28:410:28:45

A lot more successful than Cheers, I'd say.

0:28:450:28:47

No. Cheers, probably the most successful US sitcom of all time

0:28:470:28:51

apart from, maybe, M*A*S*H. Frasier very successful, though.

0:28:510:28:55

Well, sadly you're not incredibly successful in this round.

0:28:550:28:59

However, we will see you again next time,

0:28:590:29:01

when I have every confidence you will storm it through to the final.

0:29:010:29:05

Meanwhile, thanks for playing. Great contestants. Lynne and Glenys.

0:29:050:29:08

-APPLAUSE

-But for the remaining two pairs,

0:29:080:29:12

things are about to get even more exciting as we enter the head-to-head.

0:29:120:29:16

Very well done, Diane and Marc, Ali and Lucy.

0:29:210:29:23

You've made it through to the head-to-head.

0:29:230:29:26

Only one pair can make it to the final and play for the jackpot,

0:29:260:29:29

which currently stands at £4,000.

0:29:290:29:32

AUDIENCE CHEERS

0:29:320:29:34

You'll go head-to-head on the best of three.

0:29:360:29:39

For each question, each pair needs to give me just one answer,

0:29:390:29:42

but you are now allowed to confer. You have to come up with an answer

0:29:420:29:46

that scores less than the other pair.

0:29:460:29:48

The first pair to the best of three will play for today's jackpot.

0:29:480:29:52

Let's play Pointless.

0:29:520:29:54

OK. Here is your first question.

0:29:590:30:01

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

0:30:010:30:04

to name as many winners of the Cricket World Cup as they could.

0:30:040:30:09

We're looking for any team that has won cricket's World Cup

0:30:090:30:12

from the first tournament in 1975 up to and including 2011.

0:30:120:30:15

OK. Thanks very much. Diane and Marc,

0:30:150:30:18

you've played best so far, so you get to go first.

0:30:180:30:21

So, we're looking for winners of the Cricket World Cup.

0:30:210:30:24

THEY WHISPER

0:30:240:30:26

-THEY LAUGH

-Er, we don't know.

0:30:310:30:34

-I think I know.

-Go on, then.

0:30:340:30:36

Um, you don't...

0:30:360:30:39

-SHE SIGHS

-I'm going to say India.

0:30:390:30:42

India.

0:30:420:30:44

OK, very good.

0:30:440:30:46

India. I'll take India. Ali and Lucy...

0:30:460:30:49

-What do you think?

-Sport's kind of my...

0:30:490:30:51

-I would've thought India.

-India and Pakistan are both...

0:30:510:30:55

They're definitely one, I'm pretty sure.

0:30:550:30:58

I'm not sure which one would be lower.

0:30:580:31:01

-Well, we can't go for India, so...

-But there's also England,

0:31:010:31:04

there's South Africa... There's some big cricketing nations.

0:31:040:31:07

-Is South Africa low?

-I don't know if they've won it,

0:31:070:31:10

but since 1970... I don't know how often it is,

0:31:100:31:14

if it's every year or every two years.

0:31:140:31:16

Cricket's not my sport. If you want to go safe, I'd say Pakistan.

0:31:160:31:19

If you want to go risky, we can go for something...

0:31:190:31:21

I don't really know, so it's up to you.

0:31:210:31:24

-Pakistan. I think it's safe.

-You're going to say Pakistan.

0:31:250:31:28

We have India, we have Pakistan. Let's put them to the test.

0:31:280:31:32

Diane and Marc said India. Let's see if that's right,

0:31:320:31:35

and how many people said India.

0:31:350:31:37

Yes, of course.

0:31:370:31:39

78 for India.

0:31:390:31:42

APPLAUSE

0:31:420:31:44

Ali and Lucy have gone with Pakistan.

0:31:460:31:49

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many people said Pakistan.

0:31:490:31:53

78 is what you have to beat.

0:31:530:31:56

It's right...and it wins.

0:31:560:31:59

-54!

-APPLAUSE

0:31:590:32:01

54 beats 78, so after the first question,

0:32:040:32:07

Ali and Lucy are up one-nil. Richard?

0:32:070:32:09

Well done, and lucky you didn't say England or South Africa,

0:32:090:32:13

because neither of them have ever won it.

0:32:130:32:15

There are five answers. A couple would have beaten Pakistan.

0:32:150:32:18

The West Indies won the first two tournaments. 36.

0:32:180:32:21

Sri Lanka won in 1996. That would have scored you 39.

0:32:210:32:24

Pakistan won it in 1992, Imran Khan's last game. That was 54.

0:32:240:32:28

India there, 78. They've won it twice.

0:32:280:32:30

And, typically, Australia right at the top.

0:32:300:32:33

They've won four times, and would have scored 81.

0:32:330:32:35

-Well done if you got all of those.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

0:32:350:32:38

Here is your second question. Diane and Marc, you have to win this

0:32:380:32:42

to stay in the game. Here it comes.

0:32:420:32:44

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

0:32:440:32:46

to name as many Pink Ladies and T-Birds in Grease as they could.

0:32:460:32:52

Yes, any original members of the Pink Ladies or the T-Birds

0:32:520:32:55

in the film Grease, and we're looking for the character names,

0:32:550:32:59

-not the actors' or actresses'.

-Thank you very much.

0:32:590:33:02

Ali and Lucy, you get to go first this time.

0:33:020:33:05

-OK.

-You look very pleased with this category, Lucy.

0:33:050:33:08

I like Grease.

0:33:080:33:10

Um, we're going to say Marty.

0:33:100:33:14

Marty. OK.

0:33:140:33:16

Ali and Lucy going with Marty.

0:33:160:33:18

-Diane and Marc?

-I think that's a very good answer,

0:33:180:33:21

and I think I'm going to struggle to beat it.

0:33:210:33:24

-My mind's gone blank!

-There's Frenchy

0:33:240:33:26

and Kernickie, but I think they're probably quite high-scoring.

0:33:260:33:30

Er, Rizzo...

0:33:300:33:32

-You have to win this to stay in the game.

-Kernickie.

0:33:320:33:34

-Go on. Kernickie.

-Kernickie.

-Kernickie.

0:33:340:33:37

OK. Marty and Kernickie. In the order they were given,

0:33:370:33:40

Ali and Lucy have gone with Marty. If you win this point,

0:33:400:33:43

you are through to the final. Marty.

0:33:430:33:47

Is it right? How many people said it?

0:33:470:33:49

It's right.

0:33:490:33:51

Down it goes. Down it goes! Look at that. Two for Marty!

0:33:540:33:59

CHEERING / APPLAUSE

0:33:590:34:01

Marty.

0:34:010:34:04

That's a brilliant answer, Lucy. Very well done.

0:34:060:34:09

Now, Marc and Diane, let's see if Kernickie's right,

0:34:090:34:12

and if it is, how many people said Kernickie.

0:34:120:34:15

Loads!

0:34:150:34:17

Oh! 12!

0:34:220:34:25

APPLAUSE

0:34:250:34:27

Not a bad answer at all for Diane and Marc.

0:34:270:34:30

Kernickie. A great score.

0:34:300:34:33

Sadly, Marty was two. There's no beating that.

0:34:330:34:36

Which means, after only two questions,

0:34:360:34:39

Ali and Lucy are through to the final. Richard?

0:34:390:34:41

Good teamwork from Ali and Lucy. Ali wins the first point,

0:34:410:34:44

Lucy wins the second one. Through to the final.

0:34:440:34:47

There would have been some beating Marty. Let's look at those answers.

0:34:470:34:51

Putzie and Jan would have scored one point.

0:34:510:34:54

Sonny would have scored you two, as would Marty and Doody.

0:34:540:34:58

Kernickie there with 12, played by the late Jeff Conaway, of course.

0:34:580:35:02

There's Frenchy on 19, Rizzo, 24, and right at the top, Danny on 40.

0:35:020:35:07

Thanks very much. So the losing pair at the end of the head-to-head,

0:35:070:35:11

I'm afraid it's Diane and Marc. Did you know any of those other ones?

0:35:110:35:15

-Yeah.

-They just eluded you when the pressure was on.

0:35:150:35:18

I was thinking of Putz, but I couldn't have come up with Putzie.

0:35:180:35:21

I was remembering a line from Grease,

0:35:210:35:24

when a name was in it, but...

0:35:240:35:26

-You gave us two pointless answers in round one.

-I did, yes.

0:35:260:35:29

-Didn't we?

-You shone from the start.

0:35:290:35:32

You will shine again. You made it through to the head-to-head.

0:35:320:35:35

You'll be back next time, when I'm sure you will do as well

0:35:350:35:38

if not better, but thanks for playing.

0:35:380:35:40

-Great contestants. Thanks.

-APPLAUSE

0:35:400:35:43

But for Ali and Lucy, it's now time for our Pointless final,

0:35:440:35:47

and the chance to win our jackpot of £4,000.

0:35:470:35:51

Congratulations, Ali and Lucy. You've fought off the competition

0:35:560:36:00

and won our coveted Pointless trophy, so very, very well done.

0:36:000:36:03

You now have a chance to win our jackpot,

0:36:090:36:11

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £4,000.

0:36:110:36:14

There it is.

0:36:140:36:17

The rules are very simple. To win that money,

0:36:180:36:21

all you have to do is find a pointless answer,

0:36:210:36:23

an answer none of our 100 people could think of.

0:36:230:36:25

We've had two on the show today, so you only have to find one more

0:36:250:36:28

to go home with that money. First you've got to choose a category,

0:36:280:36:32

and you can choose from these three options.

0:36:320:36:34

-None of them are great, are they?

-They're all a bit horrid. Um...

0:36:400:36:43

-What do you reckon to screen icons?

-Out of the three,

0:36:430:36:46

I think screen icons is probably...

0:36:460:36:49

I mean, pop legends is so... I know literally a handful,

0:36:490:36:53

and then the rest would be a problem.

0:36:530:36:56

Fashion is so broad. It could be anything.

0:36:560:36:58

-It's between the top two. How much do you know about fashion?

-Not a lot.

0:36:580:37:02

-Screen icons?

-OK. Screen icons.

-Screen icons it is,

0:37:020:37:05

by a process of elimination. Let's find out what the question is.

0:37:050:37:09

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

0:37:090:37:12

to name as many Audrey Hepburn films as they could.

0:37:120:37:17

Audrey Hepburn films. Richard?

0:37:170:37:20

Any feature film made for cinema release

0:37:200:37:22

for which Audrey Hepburn has received an acting credit.

0:37:220:37:25

TV films, short films, documentaries don't count.

0:37:250:37:28

-Any Audrey Hepburn film, please.

-You now have up to one minute

0:37:280:37:32

to come up with three answers, and all you need

0:37:320:37:34

to win that £4,000 jackpot is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

0:37:340:37:38

Your 60 seconds start now.

0:37:380:37:41

-What do you reckon?

-I don't know.

0:37:410:37:43

I know Breakfast At Tiffany's. That's definitely not pointless.

0:37:430:37:46

Throw it in as a right answer. I can't think of...

0:37:460:37:49

-I can just about picture her.

-There's so many that...

0:37:490:37:52

I don't think I would ever know any pointless ones.

0:37:520:37:55

Can you think of any trigger word that might make up a title

0:37:550:37:58

-that could be the title?

-No!

0:37:580:38:00

I don't... I can't even think... I can't even think...

0:38:000:38:04

-What era was in it? '50s, '60s?

-I think '50s. It's old.

0:38:040:38:08

LAUGHTER

0:38:080:38:10

-We're young.

-They're old films.

-This is not good.

0:38:100:38:14

Are we just going to make up titles and hope they sound good?

0:38:140:38:17

-What do we guess, though?

-Old films.

0:38:170:38:20

-Murder On The Orient Express.

-OK, yeah. That's all.

0:38:200:38:23

-Was she in it?

-Hopefully.

0:38:230:38:26

There's two. Come up with a third one that sounds like a film title,

0:38:260:38:30

-that would have her in it.

-I can't. This is really annoying me.

0:38:300:38:33

-I can't think of one she's in.

-Got to come up with one quickly.

0:38:330:38:36

-Bella.

-OK, Bella.

-Right.

0:38:360:38:39

OK. You have three titles.

0:38:390:38:41

Your time is up. We were looking for Audrey Hepburn film titles.

0:38:410:38:46

I now need your three answers. What are you going to give me?

0:38:460:38:49

-We only really knew one.

-You knew one.

0:38:490:38:52

I'm pretty sure it's her biggest film,

0:38:520:38:54

so it won't be pointless, but we have one right answer at least.

0:38:540:38:58

-That's Breakfast At Tiffany's.

-Breakfast At Tiffany's. OK.

0:38:580:39:02

I doubt if she's in it, but Murder On The Orient Express.

0:39:020:39:06

-Murder On The Orient Express.

-And the third one,

0:39:060:39:09

in the last five seconds I came up with a made-up title.

0:39:090:39:12

I think she's good-looking, isn't she?

0:39:120:39:14

-Yeah.

-So Bella, which is...

0:39:140:39:16

-Bella.

-Good luck.

0:39:160:39:19

Brilliant. It might be a film, and she might be in it.

0:39:200:39:24

OK. Which do you think is your most confident punt?

0:39:240:39:29

-Breakfast At Tiffany's.

-We'll put that third.

0:39:290:39:31

-Least confident?

-Bella.

0:39:310:39:34

Bella. We'll put that up first.

0:39:340:39:36

Let's put them up on the board in that order, and there they are.

0:39:360:39:40

Three answers. We were looking for Audrey Hepburn films.

0:39:460:39:49

You said this was your least confident answer.

0:39:490:39:52

It's a film you've actually just made up.

0:39:520:39:54

-Yeah. Sounds good, though.

-There's a film called Bella.

0:39:540:39:57

In fact there might be several...remakes...

0:39:570:40:01

-THEY LAUGH

-..in Italian.

0:40:010:40:03

THEY LAUGH

0:40:030:40:05

You only have to find one pointless answer to win that jackpot of £4,000.

0:40:050:40:09

Let's see if Bella's correct, and if it is,

0:40:090:40:11

let's see how many people said Bella.

0:40:110:40:14

Ooh!

0:40:140:40:16

Alas,

0:40:160:40:18

Bella not a film with Audrey Hepburn in it.

0:40:180:40:21

Unfortunately not a pointless answer.

0:40:210:40:24

Two more chances to win £4,000.

0:40:240:40:28

-What would you do with £4,000?

-Not get a job.

0:40:280:40:31

THEY LAUGH

0:40:310:40:33

-Um, go on holiday.

-Yeah.

0:40:330:40:36

We could survive without a job with £4,000.

0:40:360:40:39

-And a holiday.

-Brilliant.

0:40:390:40:41

-Just live frugally.

-You can watch lots of Audrey Hepburn DVDs.

0:40:410:40:45

OK. Your next answer is Murder On The Orient Express.

0:40:450:40:49

Does it have a little sort of gamine Audrey Hepburn figure in it?

0:40:490:40:54

Let's find out! Audrey Hepburn, Murder On The Orient Express.

0:40:540:40:58

Is that right, and if it is, how many people said it?

0:40:580:41:01

Oh! Bad luck!

0:41:020:41:05

Unfortunately also not a correct answer, so therefore not pointless,

0:41:060:41:10

which means you only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

0:41:100:41:13

Well, I know this is right, but I don't think it's pointless.

0:41:130:41:18

This is right. This is right, you think?

0:41:180:41:20

Breakfast At Tiffany's. We are looking for Audrey Hepburn films.

0:41:200:41:24

This is your last shot at today's jackpot of £4,000.

0:41:240:41:27

You have to hope that it's right and it is pointless.

0:41:270:41:31

Breakfast At Tiffany's. How many people said it?

0:41:310:41:35

Is it correct?

0:41:350:41:37

There we are. It's right. It's right.

0:41:390:41:42

If this goes all the way down to zero, you are leaving -

0:41:420:41:45

-Oh!

-THEY LAUGH

0:41:450:41:47

APPLAUSE

0:41:470:41:50

With £4,000, I was about to say.

0:41:500:41:53

Unfortunately 58 people knew that,

0:41:530:41:57

so I'm afraid it's not a pointless answer,

0:41:570:42:00

which means you don't win today's jackpot of £4,000,

0:42:000:42:03

but you have been fantastic contestants,

0:42:030:42:05

and you do get to take home our Pointless trophy, so well done.

0:42:050:42:09

APPLAUSE

0:42:090:42:11

-So, Richard?

-Unlucky, guys. You played very well throughout.

0:42:150:42:19

I would recommend a weekend's Audrey Hepburn marathon, though.

0:42:190:42:23

She made some absolutely brilliant films.

0:42:230:42:25

Charade, Wait Until Dark, Funny Face - you would love them all.

0:42:250:42:29

There's a whole bunch of pointless answers.

0:42:290:42:31

Let's talk about Murder On The Orient Express, though -

0:42:310:42:35

the big '70s version was Lauren Bacall and Ingrid Bergman,

0:42:350:42:38

but no Audrey Hepburn. Let's take a look at some pointless ones.

0:42:380:42:41

Always was her last-ever film. She donated her entire fee to UNICEF.

0:42:410:42:45

Bloodline, How To Steal A Million, a brilliant film with Peter O'Toole.

0:42:450:42:49

Love In The Afternoon, The Secret People, They All Laughed, all of these pointless answers.

0:42:490:42:53

Very well done if you got those. Two For The Road,

0:42:530:42:57

We Will All Go To Monte Carlo and Young Wives' Tale,

0:42:570:43:00

-but very well played, and tough luck.

-We have to say goodbye to you,

0:43:000:43:04

but it's been brilliant having you on the show. Thank you for playing.

0:43:040:43:08

APPLAUSE

0:43:080:43:10

Nobody's won our jackpot today, so it rolls over,

0:43:110:43:14

which means on the next show, we will be playing for £5,000.

0:43:140:43:18

-THEY CHEER

-Join us then.

0:43:180:43:20

-See if someone can win it. It's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

0:43:200:43:24

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

0:43:240:43:27

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0:43:320:43:36

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0:43:360:43:40

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0:43:400:43:40

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