Episode 55 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you. I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the show where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners. Let's meet the players.

APPLAUSE

First we welcome Alan and James. How do you two know each other?

We're from Bristol and we met five years ago

-when Alan joined the theatre company that I was a member of.

-Ah! What were you doing?

We've done lots of shows together. The last one we did was the stage version of Dad's Army.

Very good indeed. What do you do, Alan?

I work in sales and marketing.

There's not really more you can say about that. At parties, someone says, "What do you do?"

you give them an answer and that's the end of the conversation, they move on.

-LAUGHTER

-James!

-LAUGHTER

-Marketing, as well. I do events, too,

so I have to organise product launches, demonstrations, exhibitions.

Right. What's the most exciting event you've organised?

I organised quite a big stand at a major exhibition at the NEC in Birmingham,

-so that was quite exciting.

-Very good.

Do you think James would make a good motivational speaker?

-I think he would.

-Very fluid style.

-Good with his hands, as well.

-Yeah, exactly.

-Motivational speaker.

-Career change, maybe.

Richard does offer a some-time careers advice thing on the side.

Is there anything you would suggest for me? I hesitate to ask.

I think you would be good in sales and marketing. LAUGHTER

-Motivational speaking, James.

-I like that idea, talking to crowds, getting people hyped up.

-Yeah!

-Will you try and motivate Alan?

-OK.

Alan, you can do really well today. Are you going to win this show?

-Alan, smile for me, you can do this, be positive.

-Yes, we're going to win!

There we are. Very, very best of luck to the pair of you.

I'm now motivated, as well. Thank you, that was superb.

We welcome back Mary and Sophie. You were on the show last time.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final. This is your second. Remind us what happened.

Erm, I kind of flaked on the "words ending in arm" question.

-So, yeah, hoping to do better today.

-Bit of a high score there.

-Yes.

Mary, what do you like to do in your spare time?

Erm, I read a lot.

I'm also really into my gardening at the moment.

Very good indeed. So a bit of horticulture wouldn't be bad, as well.

Yeah. I'm not great on Latin names, though.

I just kind of know the English names for plants.

Sophie, any other strange things you like to do that you didn't mention last time?

Not necessarily strange, but I enjoy going to the theatre,

gigs with my friends. I also have a couple of friends that are in bands

and that DJ, so I go and see them a bit.

-You follow them, as well.

-Yeah.

-Very good.

Very best of luck to the pair of you. Let's hope we see more of you than we did last time.

And next we welcome back Laura and Naomi.

You were also on the show last time. Remind us what happened.

Well, in fairness, we did lose to the better team,

but we humiliated ourselves on the football question.

and failed to redeem ourselves on the Pink Floyd question.

-Yeah, football and Pink Floyd, not the ideal categories for you.

-Terrible.

-Naomi, what do you like to do in your spare time?

-Well, living in Edinburgh,

we're quite lucky, we do very well for festivals, particularly the fringe festival,

so that keeps us busy during summer months,

there's lots of theatre and comedy that I enjoy.

Laura, how about you?

I love the festival, as well. I love films. We go to baby cinema quite often.

-Baby cinema!

-Yeah.

-How fantastic! But they're adult films, are they?

-No, no, sorry...

-LAUGHTER

-Let me rephrase that. They're not children's films.

-Some of them are,

but the last one was quite gruesome, actually.

Yeah, they generally aim the films at the parents

but they have to be suitable enough for the children to be there.

-Fantastic. Well, it's great to have you back on the show, Laura and Naomi. Very best of luck.

-Thank you.

And finally we have got Jo and Danni. How do you two know each other?

I met this lovely lady about 30 years ago, but I don't really remember it,

and she's stuck around ever since, but mums have a habit of doing that.

-Where are you from, Danni?

-We're from Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire.

Aylesbury. Jo, what would you like to see come up?

Food and drink would be great

because we both love experimental cooking and like drinking wine.

Very good. Experimental cooking? What do you mean by that?

I think the best experimental recipe I tried was turkey lasagne.

Unfortunately, nobody ate it. It was the most disgusting...

-You make a turkey mince?

-Yeah.

-I don't recommend it to anyone.

-A white mince?

-It kind of goes to a mush,

-so you have a turkey mush.

-Mmm! It just gets better and better.

Turkey mush! Mmm!

It was essentially the worst Christmas ever. LAUGHTER

Danni, what else would you like to come up?

-Science I'm OK at. I did science at A-Level, so that'd be OK.

-OK.

Musicals, theatre, we quite enjoy that.

-Books.

-Yeah. 70s music for Mum would be fine. I'd be lost.

OK. Well, let's hope some or all of those things will come up this afternoon.

We'll find out more about all of you throughout the show.

One person left to introduce. He's forever disappointed with evolution. It's just not fast enough.

-He is my pointless friend. He's Richard.

-Hiya.

APPLAUSE

-Afternoon to you.

-Good afternoon to you.

-Should be a good show today.

Two returning pairs. Laura and Naomi probably came up against the best pair of the whole series.

Very unlucky in the Head-To-Head. We didn't see enough of Mary and Sophie, knocked out in the first round,

so they could be a surprise package. I would say Round One will suit Mary today.

You'll be delighted to hear.

-Round One is going to suit you, Mary.

-It's making me nervous.

And me. Thank you very much, Richard.

We put our questions to 100 people before the show, but we're after the obscure answers they didn't get.

To stay in the game with a chance to win our jackpot, score as few points as you can.

What everyone's trying to do is find a pointless answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add £1,000 to that.

So today's jackpot starts off at £4,000.

APPLAUSE

-Right, let's play Pointless!

-APPLAUSE

In the first round, each of you must give me one answer and you cannot confer with your partner.

Whichever team has the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated.

Our first category this afternoon is...

-There you are, Mary.

-Thank you.

-Decide in your pairs who'll go first, who'll go second.

And whoever's going first, step up to the podium.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many trees as they could.

-Trees, Richard.

-The correct answers in this round will all be trees or shrubs

that can be found growing wild in the United Kingdom.

That's according to the Woodland Trust website.

OK. Alan and James, you all drew lots before the show and this afternoon you get to go first.

We're going to give you a choice of seven possible answers in each pass.

Your first set of seven answers reads like this.

I can tell you that at least one of those answers is pointless

and at least one of those answers is incorrect,

so be careful not to pick one of those, because you'll score 100 points.

Now then, Alan, trees. Trees.

-Is this good for you?

-Really no.

Trees are not something I pay much attention to.

-They look nice, but names, no.

-Mm.

But I think that rather than risk going for 100 points,

I'm going to go for the one that is least likely of the ones I know

which is cedar.

Cedar you are saying. Let's see if cedar is right,

and if it is, how many people said cedar.

It's right.

-15!

-APPLAUSE

15 not a bad score at all. 15 for cedar, Richard.

Good start, Alan. Not native to the UK, from Lebanon originally,

but from the 18th century, every stately home had a cedar tree, that's when they became popular.

-Very good. Sophie.

-Yes.

-We come to you.

There's a few on there that I think I've heard of.

-This is good.

-Yeah.

-This is good.

Erm, I think I'm going to go for rowan.

You're going to go for rowan.

At the bottom. Let's see if it's right,

and if it is, how many people said rowan.

It is right.

-20!

-APPLAUSE

-20 for rowan. Richard.

-Yeah, well played.

The rowan tree. Has an association with magic and witchcraft, the rowan tree.

Laura. Remember, we're looking for British trees and shrubs.

There's one up there that I definitely know,

and one that I think is right, but it's very risky,

so I'm going to go for one that I hope is a tree. I'm going to go for aspen.

Aspen. Very good, Laura. Let's see if aspen's right, and if it is, how many people said aspen.

It's right!

Very well done indeed, Laura. That's a great answer and it scores you just one.

APPLAUSE Yeah, very, very good answer.

Much more popular in America. One of the most widely distributed trees in the United States, the quaking aspen.

-So then, Jo, we come to you.

-Oh, dear.

Now then, you're the last person to have this board, so you can fill in all the blanks for us.

There's one that I know that's left,

but I think that's going to be fairly high,

so I'm going to have a guess at the top answer, osier.

-Osier.

-I don't think it's right, but I'll have a go.

Osier says Jo. Naomi is nodding. I don't know if Naomi knows

the first thing about trees, but she's nodding. Osier says Jo.

-Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people said it. Very best of luck, Jo.

-Thank you.

It's right!

I have a feeling this might be going all the way down.

-Yes, it does!

-APPLAUSE

-That's brilliant, Jo!

Very well done. That's a pointless answer, it adds £250 to the jackpot, takes the total up to £4,250

and it scores you nothing. Very well done indeed. Osier, Richard.

Well played, Jo. Great start to your Pointless career. It's been used for centuries for weaving.

A very fast-growing tree. We'll hear more about it cos you can use it for biofuel.

-I suspect osier won't be pointless for long.

-Very good.

Let's fill in the rest of the board. Everyone was quite right to avoid sycamore.

That would've scored you 35 points. It's the highest answer on the board.

Other than wrong answers, of course. Those other two, pointless, wrong?

Well, the Tyburn Tree is famously where they used to hang people.

Absolutely right. It's a gallows in London, so that was incorrect. And gartner?

I... I'm going to guess that you're in a generous mood today and you've put two pointless answers up there

-and gartner is pointless.

-Yeah, it's incorrect. LAUGHTER

Gartner, a character from the German kids' TV show The Singing Ringing Tree.

Well, thanks very much, Richard. We're halfway through the round so let's look at the scores.

Jo and Danni looking brilliant on nothing.

Then we come up one point to where Naomi and Laura are.

Then up to 15, where Alan and James are.

And then up to Sophie and Mary on 20. So all pretty close together.

But, Sophie and Mary, you are unmistakably ahead, so Mary, you'll have to find a nice obscure tree

and hope that's enough to see you through to the next round.

We'll come back down the line. Second players, take your places.

Splendid. We're going to put seven more answers on the board and here they are.

Remember, we're looking for trees and shrubs. And we've got...

Again, I can tell you at least one of those answers is pointless

and at least one of them is incorrect.

Try and avoid those incorrect ones.

Danni, the high scorers are Mary and Sophie on 20. You're on nothing.

If you can score 19 or less,

you are definitely in the next round.

There's quite a few on there that I know

and I'm so glad that I wasn't on the other round,

cos I would've picked a 100-pointer.

On this one, I'll go with a monkey puzzle, cos there was one in our local park that we used to climb.

OK, monkey puzzle. There is your red line.

If you can get below that, you are safely through to the next round.

Let's see if monkey puzzle is right, and if it is, how many people said it.

It's right.

-Very well done!

-APPLAUSE

Eight points for monkey puzzle, takes your total up to eight.

Good answer, Danni. You can relax for the rest of the round. It's a conifer.

It was originally from Chile and Argentina.

-Problem with that?

-No, I was going to say, monkey puzzle, if I were a monkey,

there'd be nothing remotely puzzling about that. It's pretty much straight up and down

-with quite a lot of horizontal branches.

-But it's very, very gnarled and twisty.

But a monkey would go... That would puzzle a monkey for less than a second.

-It would go, "Ooh, ooh. Ahh, ooh, ooh."

-LAUGHTER

It's not a difficult puzzle. It's like an easy Sudoku. But it's still a puzzle. It'd look a little bit.

OK, thank you very much. We come to you, Naomi.

-Yes.

-You're on one. The high scorers are still Mary and Sophie on 20.

If you can score 18 or less, through you go to the next round.

I don't know a lot about trees.

There are some familiar answers up there,

but I think this is going to be quite a tight round.

I'm going to go for silver birch.

OK. Let's see. Silver birch. Is it right? How many people said it?

It's right.

-Ooh! Not quite. Not quite.

-APPLAUSE

That scores you 21 and takes your total up to 22.

-Richard.

-Yeah, not quite, but pretty good answer, Naomi.

Silver birch is native to the UK. You can get silver birch wine in Scotland.

-I don't know if you've ever enjoyed a silver birch wine.

-No.

-Silver birch wine.

-Made from the sap of the silver birch tree.

It sounds revolting. Very good. Now then, Mary.

The high scorers are now Naomi and Laura on 22.

You're on 20, which means if you can score one or less, you are through to the next round.

What does that board look like?

Well, I'm not sure about this one, but I'm going to go for it

because I've got nothing to lose.

-The guelder rose.

-There it is.

Let's see if guelder rose is right, and if it is, how many people said it. Best of luck.

It's right.

Very well done, Mary. Look at that. Down it goes.

-Yes! That's superb!

-APPLAUSE

That has done exactly what it needed to. A pointless answer.

It adds another £250 to today's jackpot, takes the total up to £4,500.

It scores you nothing, Mary, and leaves your total at 20.

You are through to the next round. Very well done. Richard.

-Well played. That's better than last time.

-It is.

Quite a common shrub in the UK with white flowers and red berries.

-Thank you very much. Now, James.

-Yes.

-All to play for in this last answer.

The high scorers are Naomi and Laura on 22. You're on 15. You have to score six or less.

Yes. I'm in a bit of a predicament, because the top two answers,

which are obvious, will be worth far more than the others.

So I'm not going to go for one of those, even though I know they are both trees.

Which means I'm left with the other two in the middle.

So it's going to be a 50/50 chance for me and I am going to go for...

-..larkin.

-You're going for larkin.

-What do you think, Alan?

-I'd have gone for grey willow, but as I said, I know nothing about trees.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people said larkin.

There's your red line. Below that, through to the next round.

Above that, we say goodbye to you.

Larkin.

Bad luck, James.

I'm afraid larkin is an incorrect answer. It sounds right.

It sounds like it could be a tree. I knew monkey puzzle, as well,

-but it was just the way it fell.

-It's got a bit of larch in it or something.

Anyway, sadly, it's incorrect. It scores you 100 points,

takes your total up to 115, I'm afraid. Richard.

Sorry, James. Laura and Naomi are so nice,

they really tried to pretend to look gutted there.

There was just a little look on their faces. It was very kind of them.

Larkin. We chose that because one of his more famous poems is The Trees.

Philip Larkin, of course. And if you'd gone for grey willow,

it was a pointless answer.

Sorry. It was 50/50, as you say.

Grey willow is another name for the pussy willow. Prefers to be known as the grey willow, for some reason.

Let's take a look at the other two. The ash tree was the highest scorer on the board.

That would've scored you 64. And the horse chestnut would've been 36.

So the grey willow would've been the one to save you.

OK. Thank you, Richard. At the end of Round One, the losing pair with the highest score, Alan and James.

Now that was a motivational round.

It was sad times. It's just the way it fell.

-Well, you did exactly the right thing only with the wrong answer.

-Maybe next time.

-Also, can I just commend you on your matching shirts?

-Do you like that?

-Yes.

-Very, very good indeed.

-Thanks.

-Please keep this up for next time.

-We'll do our best for you.

-Splendid.

-Thanks very much, James and Alan. Great to have you on the show.

-APPLAUSE

But for the remaining pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

There's only room for two pairs in the Head-To-Head,

so one of the teams will be leaving us at the end of this round.

Our category for Round Two is...

Decide in your pairs who'll go first, who'll go second.

And whoever's first, step up to the podium.

OK. So our question concerns...

Film stars with alliterative names. Richard.

We'll show you a list of six films on each pass.

We asked 100 people to tell us which star of that film had an alliterative name,

their first name and surname beginning with the same letter. Give us an obscure answer

and you'll score fewer points, but a wrong answer scores 100.

There'll be 12 films in all, 12 stars to guess at home.

You must have been in a film, have you?

-I have, yeah. I haven't really starred in a film, though.

-Oh, OK.

But if we were to say your wedding video, the answer would be Alexander Armstrong, say.

I wasn't the star of that, though.

-Oh, come on!

-Yeah, yeah, I was.

-LAUGHTER You looked pretty good.

-I looked pretty good.

So then, we are looking for the alliterative film stars

from these films. And here is our first list.

There we are. What about those films, Mary?

Well, I'm OK with two or three of them

and the one I'm going to go with is Doris Day, Calamity Jane.

Doris Day, Calamity Jane says Mary. Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people knew that.

It's right.

-Very well done, Mary, 22.

-APPLAUSE

-Good answer. Doris Day, Richard.

-Yeah, well played, Mary.

Or Doris Von Kappelhoff, which isn't alliterative, but she did change it, so...

-Laura.

-Yep.

-Laura. How many of these do you know?

I know two or three, but I'm having a complete blank for one of them.

So I'm going to hope, I think the star of Charlie's Angels was Lucy Liu.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people knew Lucy Liu.

It's right.

-38.

-APPLAUSE

38 for Lucy Liu. Richard.

Yeah, well done, Laura. Came to fame in Ally McBeal, Lucy Liu.

Very good indeed. Now then, Danni. You're the last person to have this board

-so you can talk us through all of the films and their stars.

-There's two I have no idea,

Secrets & Lies and 48 Hours I've no idea.

Rocky, obviously I know that one, that's Sylvester Stallone, but I'm going to go with Under Siege

-and I think it's Steven Seagal.

-Steven Seagal, Under Siege says Danni.

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

It's right.

-40. Wow.

-APPLAUSE

Right but quite a high score. 40 for Steven Seagal, Richard.

Well, popular film, popular actor. He was a martial arts instructor before he became sort of an actor,

Steven Seagal. LAUGHTER

Let's fill in the rest. You were right to avoid Rocky. Would've scored 75 points.

It was Sylvester Stallone. The other two,

48 Hours, do you know that one?

I can only think of Eddie Murphy. Who else is in it?

-It's Nick Nolte.

-Nick Nolte. Good.

Don't see him around so much any more. 12 points.

-And the best answer on the board is Secrets & Lies.

-Brenda Blethyn.

Brenda Blethyn. Would've scored you seven. Well done if you got that at home.

Very good. We're halfway through the round so let's take a look at the scores.

Mary and Sophie, the best answer of the pass, 22. Lovely low score.

Then up quite a way to 38, where we find Laura and Naomi.

And then up a tiny bit to 40, where Danni and Jo currently are.

So, yes, Jo and Naomi, it's between the pair of you.

You're going to have to tussle it out in this next pass to see who stays and who goes, I reckon.

We'll come back down the line. Second players, take your places.

OK, we're going to put six more films on the board. And here they are.

Remember, we're looking for the alliterative film stars,

film stars whose first name and second name begin with the same letter.

Jo, you're trying to find the one the fewest of our 100 people knew.

I know a few of those films,

but, erm, I think I'm going to go for The Sting and Robert Redford.

Robert Redford. You're the high scorers on 40,

so you have to hope this goes down as far as it can.

Robert Redford. How many people said it, is it right?

It's right.

-Wow, 17.

-APPLAUSE

Best answer so far. 17 takes your total up to 57. Richard.

Yeah, well played, Jo. He was nominated for Best Actor for his role as Johnny Hooker in The Sting.

Very good indeed. Now, Naomi, the high scorers are now Jo and Danni on 57. You're on 38.

If you can score 18 or less, you're through to the next round.

-What do you think of this board?

-I could be in trouble.

I think I must spend too much time with the babies at baby cinema

-and not enough time watching the films.

-Have some of these not been on at baby cinema?

Strangely enough, no, we've missed some of these.

There's two that I recognise, and I suspect they will both be popular answers,

but I wouldn't even have an educated guess for any of the others.

So I'm going to go with Mike Myers for Wayne's World.

Mike Myers for Wayne's World. Let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

-45.

-APPLAUSE

45 for Mike Myers, takes your total up to 83. Richard.

Yeah, born in Canada to British parents, Mike Myers.

Started on Saturday Night Live, the Wayne's World sketches.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now, Sophie.

-Yes.

The high scorers are now Naomi and Laura on 83.

You're on 22, which means if you can score 60 or less, you are through to the Head-To-Head.

OK. Erm, I was going to go for Mean Girls and Lindsay Lohan.

-Lindsay Lohan, Mean Girls.

-Yes.

-Very good. Here is your red line.

-If you can get below that red line with Lindsay Lohan, you are in the Head-To-Head.

-OK.

Let's see if it's right, Lindsay Lohan and Mean Girls. If it is, how many people said it?

Absolutely right.

Yep, you've done it.

-32 for Mean Girls. Takes your total up to 54.

-APPLAUSE

-Richard.

-Yeah, well played, Sophie, very good answer, Mean Girls.

Written by Tina Fey, also of Saturday Night Live fame and 30 Rock.

Let's take a look at the rest of the board, fill those in.

-Some Like It Hot.

-Marilyn Monroe.

Absolutely. That was the biggest score on the board, 52.

The Gold Rush. The clue there is in the date, 1925.

-Charlie Chaplin.

-Absolutely right. Would've scored you 14.

And Mrs Miniver. Mrs Miniver. Best answer up there.

-I don't know.

-Would've scored you two points.

She won a Best Actress Oscar for her performance in this film,

-it was Greer Garson.

-Ah.

-Two points.

She gave the longest acceptance speech of all time.

-Wow.

-Five and a half minutes she rabbited on about Mrs Miniver.

-That was in the war, as well. Like time wasn't precious!

-LAUGHTER

Wow. Thank you very much, Richard. So, at the end of the round,

the losing pair with the highest score, I'm afraid it's Laura and Naomi. Head-To-Head last time.

-Round Two this time.

-Not so good.

-Did you know any others on that board?

-I only knew Marilyn Monroe

-so I made the best of what I had.

-I guess it was probably the right one.

Well, it was a very close round actually, in the end,

but someone has to go and I'm afraid you are the high scorers.

It's been great having you on the show, Naomi and Laura.

-Thanks for playing. Wonderful contestants.

-APPLAUSE

For the remaining pairs, things get even more exciting as we enter the Head-To-Head.

Very well done, Jo and Danni, Sophie and Mary, you have made it through to the Head-To-Head.

Only one pair can make it through to the final and play for the jackpot which currently stands at £4,500.

APPLAUSE

For each question each pair needs to give me just one answer but you are now allowed to confer.

All you need is an answer that scores less than the other pair and you win the question.

The first pair to win two questions plays for today's jackpot.

-Let's play Pointless.

-APPLAUSE

Here's your first question.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many Commonwealth Games host cities as they could. Commonwealth Games host cities, Richard.

We're looking for any city that has hosted the Commonwealth Games

since they began as the Empire Games in 1930 all the way up to 2010, please.

OK. Thanks, Richard.

Jo and Danni, you've played best throughout the show so far, so you get to go first.

-THEY WHISPER

-Birmingham?

-THEY WHISPER I

-think it was Manchester.

-OK?

-Yep. We can only come up with one. So fingers crossed that we're right.

-And we're going to go with Manchester.

-OK, Manchester you are saying.

Sophie and Mary? Cities that have hosted the Commonwealth Games.

-We came up with a grand total of one answer, and we're hoping it's right, Melbourne.

-Melbourne.

OK, we have Manchester, we have Melbourne. In the order they were given,

Jo and Danni said Manchester, let's see if that's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

It's right.

-APPLAUSE

-There we are. 22. 22 for Manchester.

Now, Sophie and Mary have gone for Melbourne.

22 is the score it has to go lower than.

Melbourne, let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

-It is right.

-Yes!

Oh, look at that.

-Oh, and you win!

-APPLAUSE

Very close indeed, but 18 for Melbourne beats 22 for Manchester.

So, after one question, Sophie and Mary are in the lead one-nil.

-Richard.

-Two good answers there. Let's take a look at all the answers.

A couple of pointless ones. The first Empire Games were held in Hamilton.

Victoria in British Columbia held it in 1994,

well done if you said either of those.

Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia would have scored you one.

Kingston, Jamaica and Christchurch, New Zealand score two.

Perth, Australia would have scored you three.

Edmonton, Canada four. Cardiff, Wales would have scored you five points.

Vancouver in Canada would have scored you six. Brisbane, Australia seven.

Auckland in New Zealand, one of only two cities to have held it twice, 11. Melbourne 18.

Manchester 22. New Delhi, which was the 2010 Commonwealth Games, would've scored you 27.

Edinburgh, which has also held it twice, 28. Sydney 31.

And London has only held it once in 1934 but still scored 47 points.

Thank you, Richard. Here is your second question.

Jo and Danni, you have to win this question to stay in the game. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many

One Foot In The Grave characters as they could.

-One Foot In The Grave characters. Richard.

-We want any of the six named, credited characters

who appeared in ten or more episodes of the BBC sitcom One Foot In The Grave.

We're looking for the character names not the actors. First names alone will suffice.

OK. Now, Sophie and Mary, you go first this time.

THEY WHISPER

Er, I must admit, I haven't really watched...

I'm aware of it, because who isn't?

And consequently the only character I'm really familiar with is Victor.

OK, Victor it is.

-OK.

-We've never watched it, either.

-No.

-Never watched it.

-Right.

-And that's about the only character we know.

-That is the only character.

-I know he has a wife in it.

-Mrs Meldrew.

-We haven't come up with a name.

Enid. I've no idea. Enid.

You're going for Enid. OK, we have Victor, we have Enid.

Mary and Sophie have gone with Victor, let's see if it's right, and if so, how many people said Victor.

It's right.

-67.

-APPLAUSE

Jo and Danni, this was the question you have to win to stay in the game.

You're saying Enid. Let's see if Enid could do it for you.

Is Enid right? And if it is, will it beat Victor?

Bad luck. Bad luck.

I'm afraid Enid an incorrect answer, which means Sophie and Mary, through to the final two-nil.

-Well done indeed. Richard.

-Unlucky, Jo and Danni. Tricky if you've never watched the programme.

Let's see all the answers. I suspect a lot of fans out there will have got a lot of these.

The next-door neighbour with the bed-ridden mother who you never meet,

Nick Swainey, scored five points.

The couple next door, Patrick Trench played by Angus Deayton, eight,

Pippa Trench played by Janine Duvitski, nine.

Mrs Warboys would have scored you 19.

Margaret Meldrew is his wife, not Enid, played by Annette Crosbie,

that would have scored you 22. And Victor Meldrew, Richard Wilson, 67.

And I can believe it.

-LAUGHTER

-Can you now?

Very good. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

So the losing pair at the end of the Head-To-Head is Jo and Danni.

Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear. You stormed it through. You've had a very good game so far.

-It was just Victor Meldrew that let us down, I think.

-Yeah.

I wouldn't have known any answer apart from the one everyone gave.

Yeah. Well, we will see you again next time and we'll look forward to it very much indeed.

-Thanks so much, Jo and Danni. Brilliant contestants.

-APPLAUSE

But for Mary and Sophie, it's now time for our Pointless final and the chance to win our jackpot of £4,500.

APPLAUSE

Well, congratulations, Mary and Sophie, you've made it through to the final,

you fought off all the competition, and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy. Very well done.

APPLAUSE

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £4,500.

APPLAUSE

The rules very are simple. To win the money,

all you have to do is find a pointless answer, that's one that none of our 100 people thought of.

We've had two pointless answers on the show today. In fact, Mary, you came up with guelder rose.

Just find one more and you will go home with that money. First, choose a category.

You can choose from these three options.

-What do you think? Crime Fiction?

-Crime Fiction or Theatre.

-Cos you read quite a lot of crime.

-And you do, too, don't you?

-Yeah.

-Crime Fiction.

-Crime Fiction it's going to be. OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Agatha Christie Marple and Poirot novels as they could. Richard.

We're looking for any Agatha Christie novel featuring Miss Marple or Poirot.

Plays or short story collections are not allowed. So any novel featuring Poirot or Miss Marple.

-OK.

-Thank you, Richard. OK, you now have up to a minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £4,500 is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

Your 60 seconds start now.

-OK.

-I don't think we should go for...

-Death On The Nile.

Yeah, OK. So what should we go for? Do you know any?

-Murder In The Library.

-Yeah? OK.

-I think.

-I've never heard of that one. So that's a good one.

Something at the ABC.

Monkeys? Is there something with monkeys?

Erm, oh, OK.

-I'm trying to think of all the David Suchet...

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-..Poirots, but my mind has gone blank. Can you think of any more?

-No.

Something about races. Races or poison or...

My mind's gone blank.

Er, erm, OK, think of all the...

-We've got six seconds.

-Five seconds left.

-Er, I think Murder In The Library.

-Yeah.

-And that's it.

OK, there is your minute up.

You were looking for Agatha Christie Poirot or Miss Marple novels.

I now need three answers from you.

-Oh, no!

-Well, we've come up with Murder In The Library.

-Murder In The Library.

-Murder On The Orient Express.

-Murder On The Orient Express.

-Death On The Nile.

-And Death On The Nile.

There we are. Of those three, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Possibly Murder In The Library...

-Murder In The Library.

-..cos we know the other two are really popular.

We'll put Murder In The Library third, then. Which is your least likely, do you think?

-The Orient Express.

-Yeah. I think so.

So we'll put the Orient Express first. We'll put them up on the board in that order. Here we go.

OK, we were looking for Agatha Christie Poirot and Miss Marple novels.

This was your least confident answer.

Remember, you only have to find one pointless answer to win that £4,500 jackpot.

Let's see. Murder On The Orient Express, let's see if it's right, and if so, how many people said it.

It's right. Now, if this goes all the way down to zero,

you'll be leaving here with £4,500.

-40.

-APPLAUSE

-So not a pointless answer.

-No.

-You only have two more chances to win today's jackpot.

What would you do with £4,500, Mary?

I think I'd use it to visit my brother in Australia, actually. Yes.

-Very good. Sophie?

-Put my mother out of her misery and move out of home.

-LAUGHTER

OK, well, let's hope one of these answers will win it for you. £4,500 riding on Death On The Nile.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, how many people said it.

Yes, it's right. Murder On The Orient Express scored you 40,

let's see if Death On The Nile can go down further for you.

Down it goes, into the 30s. This is all looking much better.

-21.

-APPLAUSE

Well, you put them in exactly the right order.

You almost halved your total from the first answer.

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

-Do you think this is right?

-I hope so.

-THEY LAUGH

Murder In The Library. Have you read it?

Erm, no, but I bought my friend the mug.

My friend and I are big Agatha Christie fans,

so I know there's definitely a title called Murder In The Library.

-One of those...

-Penguin Classics.

-..Penguin Classic mugs.

-Yeah.

It's orange, isn't it, that mug, I believe?

-Green.

-Oh, it's green. Oh!

-LAUGHTER

See how little I know.

-Pride And Prejudice is orange.

-There you go.

-Cos we've got that one, haven't we?

OK so you're pretty sure about this.

-I don't want to...

-It's just whether or not it's pointless. OK, £4,500 is riding on it.

You are saying Murder In The Library. There it is at the bottom of the screen.

This is your last shot at that £4,500 jackpot.

It has to be right and it has to be pointless.

If it's both of those things, you leave here with £4,500.

Let's see. Murder In The Library, is it right?

-Oh, bad luck!

-You made that mug up!

-APPLAUSE

Unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer,

so I'm afraid you don't go home with today's jackpot of £4,500, which rolls over to the next show.

But you have been fantastic contestants and you do take home our Pointless trophy. Well done.

APPLAUSE

Let's first solve the mysterious mystery of the mug.

-Yes.

-It's The Body In The Library.

-The Body In The Library. Agh!

But would've scored you four points. Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers.

A couple of Marple books, A Caribbean Mystery and At Bertrams Hotel.

Evil Under The Sun, the Poirot mystery film with Peter Ustinov, that was pointless.

Hickory Dickory Dock, which in America was called Hickory Dickory Death. Great name for a book.

Sleeping Murder, Miss Marple's last case. Taken At The Flood, another Poirot mystery.

All pointless. The Mysterious Affair At Styles, Poirot's first ever case.

They Do It With Mirrors was another pointless answer.

And Three Act Tragedy. Very well done if you got any of those at home. And unlucky. You played so well.

-Tough last category but you were so close.

-Thanks very much.

-Did you know any of those? Yes, you did, by the sound of things.

-Yes.

It's so much easier when you see the answers.

-Isn't it?

-It is.

-LAUGHTER

More than having to dredge through the memory.

Always hard when there's a clock ticking. That doesn't help.

We do have to say goodbye to you, Mary and Sophie. It's been brilliant having you on the show.

-Thank you both so much for playing. Brilliant contestants. Very good.

-APPLAUSE

Nobody has won our jackpot today so it rolls over, which means on the next show,

-we will be playing for £5,500.

-APPLAUSE

-Join us to see if someone can win. Till then it's goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

-..and it's goodbye from me, goodbye.

-CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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