Episode 12 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong

and welcome to Pointless, the quiz show that puts obscure knowledge to the test.

Let's meet today's players.

APPLAUSE

So first up, we welcome Richard and Emma. Where have you come from?

-Sheffield.

-From Sheffield. Emma, what are you hoping is going to come up this afternoon?

Anything to do with Patrick Swayze, really.

-Anything to do with Patrick Swayze.

-Yeah, anything.

OK. You've got the full Swayze canon...?

Not all of them, but I was in his fan club before he died.

What, you just stopped being a fan after he died?

-Well, no, but it's not the same, really.

-Really?

Yeah, but I've got a poster of him next to Daniel Craig and A-ha in my bedroom.

-OK, that makes up for it, I'm sure.

-Yeah.

-Richard, how do you know Emma?

I was at the delivery when she was delivered. I'm her dad.

-Aw! I'm glad. You could have been the obstetrician, but yes.

-Yes.

-Or both!

-True.

Richard, what'll be a strong suit for you?

-'80s music, probably.

-Why's that?

-I used to be a DJ in the '80s.

-Who was your favourite band?

-Human League, probably.

-Oh, Sheffield band as well.

-True, I forgot.

-Absolutely, love The Human League.

Very good. Lovely to have you here, welcome to the show.

Next, we welcome Nathan and Damian back to the show.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final.

This is your second chance. Remind us what happened.

We lost in the deciding round of the head-to-head

on Government acronyms.

-Oh, Government acronyms!

-DEFRA.

-That's right, DEFRA.

-You went for fisheries.

-It used to be fisheries, but now it's food.

-I see.

-Disappointed, I should've known!

-Very disappointing.

-AUDIENCE LAUGHS

-..If it's food.

-To be fair, though, it wasn't crisps, was it?

-No, it wasn't.

Crisps is Damian's particular pet subject.

-They might come up.

-Who knows?

-They didn't last time.

-No, I'm devastated.

Looking very strong for crisps. How do you two know each other, Nathan?

-We're brothers.

-What do you hope will come up? What will make up for the lack of crisps?

-Anything to do with West Ham.

-OK, West Ham.

-Or music.

My favourite band of all time is Joy Division, closely followed by Suede.

Lovely to have you back, Nathan and Damian. Very best of luck.

Next, we welcome back Diane and Paula. You were also on the show last time.

-Remand us what happened to you.

-We went out in the second round.

-What was the category?

-History.

-Paula, what would you like to see come up?

Maybe children's literature.

Good, with particular emphasis on what, what are your favourite children's authors?

Any sort of crossovers, so Alice In Wonderland, Narnia, Northern Lights.

-OK.

-..Harry Potter.

-Harry Potter. Diane, how about you?

I think '80s music would be a good subject.

We've got The Human League, Joy Division, Suede...

-Favourite band?

-Beautiful South, as was.

-I was about to say, Aswad?!

-"As was!" They're not together any more.

-Indeed.

Well, very, very best of luck. Lovely having you back on the show.

Finally, we welcome Pam and Andrew. How do you two know each other?

Well, one of my good friends, Martin, is Pamela's son.

-Right, and where have you come from?

-From Blyth in Northumberland.

-God's own country.

-Exactly.

Pam, what do you hope will come up this afternoon?

-Soaps, probably. Anything but Hollyoaks.

-Anything but Hollyoaks?

-Yes.

And also '80s music again.

Pam, nominate your favourite band.

-Queen.

-Queen?

-Meat Loaf.

-Almost '70s music, actually.

-Yes.

-'70s, '80s music.

-What do you do, Pam?

-I work for St Oswald's Hospice in Newcastle.

-I'm a children's administrator.

-Very good indeed. Andrew, what about you?

I'm an archivist in the civil service.

Right, is that... I'm trying to think what that might turn into in a Pointless round.

Does that give you any strength in this show?

-Not really. I would say that history's not a strong point.

-OK.

-An archivist not so big on history!

-AUDIENCE LAUGHS

I did manage to find Pamela in the archives, though.

LAUGHTER

Very good. Welcome, lovely to have you here. We'll find out more

about all of you throughout the show.

Only one person left to introduce.

When Google doesn't know something, they ask Richard. They "Richard" it.

-He's my Pointless friend, he's Richard.

-Hiya, hello. APPLAUSE

-Afternoon.

-Top of the afternoon to you.

-Are you well today?

-I'm extremely well.

-Should be a good show today. Nathan and Damian, very unlucky last time.

Went all the way through to the last point in the head-to-head, so they'll have

just one extra point to prove today, I think.

But Diane and Paula were unlucky in the round they got knocked out in,

so they are tough competition as well.

The good news for Emma, if you like everything about Patrick Swayze,

Round One is about Patrick Swayze's pets.

LAUGHTER

-So, good news?

-Hmm, sort of. Sort of, no.

Very good. And after the Patrick Swayze's Pets round, anything else we can look forward to?

Yes, we're looking for The Hats of Patrick Swayze in Round Two.

Very good. We'll look forward to that. Thank you, Richard.

All our Pointless questions were put to 100 people before the show,

but we are looking for the obscure answers that they didn't get.

To stay in the game with a chance of winning our jackpot, our players need

to score as few points as possible. What everyone is trying to do is find a pointless answer -

an answer none of our 100 people gave. Each time that happens, we'll add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add another £1,000 to that. Today's jackpot starts off at...

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Ready? Let's play Pointless.

Now, in this first round, each of you must give me one answer, and you cannot confer.

Whichever team has the highest score at the end will be eliminated.

If you give an incorrect answer, you will score the maximum of 100 points, so try and avoid those.

Our first category this afternoon is...

Decide in your pairs who is going to go first and second.

THEY CONFER

Whoever is first, step up to the podium.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

-Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. Richard.

-Yeah, another one of our

Hollywood couple questions. They've been a couple for nearly 30 years.

I need the name of any cinema feature film, for which either Kurt Russell

or Goldie Hawn received an acting credit, or both of them together.

No TV films, documentaries or short films, but voice performances count.

I was going to give double points for a film with both,

but that would be a very bad thing and pointless.

LAUGHTER

Thank you, Richard. Now, then, Emma and Richard, you all drew lots before the show,

and this afternoon, you are going to got first.

Emma, Kurt Russell... Well, let's start with film.

Films that don't have Daniel Craig or Patrick Swayze in them,

do you even bother seeing them?

Yeah, I do. Unfortunately, I don't know who Goldie Hawn is.

I might do... I'd probably know who they are if I saw them, but the names...

-Does that go for that go for Kurt Russell, as well?

-I'm not sure. I've got an idea, but it could be wrong.

My dad's probably screaming in his mind at me, right now, cos I know he'll have a good answer.

-So it's going to be a little bit of a guess.

-OK.

So, I'm going to say, Escape From LA.

Escape From LA. I have no idea. I wouldn't even be able to come up with that.

Escape From LA, says Emma. Is it right? If so, how many of our 100 people said Escape From LA?

It's right! Very well done.

It's a brilliant answer, Emma! Look at that!

Escape From LA scores you 5.

Perfect answer, Emma. That is indeed Kurt Russell. The relief on your dad's face was a sight to behold.

1996 John Carpenter film.

-Nathan... Nathan.

-Yes. Going to go for Goldie Hawn and, I think, Private Benjamin.

Private Benjamin. That is the answer I would have given.

LAUGHTER

We can find out together how much we jointly know about Goldie Hawn.

Private Benjamin, says Nathan. Is it right? How many people said it?

It's right.

32.

-32 for Private Benjamin.

-And 32 years old that film is, as well.

-Not to depress anybody.

-Really?

-Yep, 1980.

-Yeah.

-Oh, wow.

That's a kick in the teeth, isn't it?

LAUGHTER

Yeah.

OK, Diane. So we're looking for Goldie Hawn or Kurt Russell films.

I think I'm going to go with Goldie Hawn and say, Death Becomes Her.

Death Becomes Her, Goldie Hawn.

Let's see if that's right. How many people said Death Becomes Her?

It's right.

Look at that! Brilliant! What a great answer! Diane!

Death Becomes Her.

-Best score so far.

-Great answer. Stars with Meryl Streep.

They drink a potion which makes them immortal - only in the film.

-Only in the film.

-Although, you never know.

Perhaps they are.

Now, then, Pam.

-Yes.

-Remember, we are looking for Goldie Hawn or Kurt Russell films.

-Is this a good category for you?

-It was until the answers that have just gone that I was thinking of.

I'm going to... I'm not sure if she was in it, but it's the only one I can think of,

-Nine Till Five.

-OK, let's see if that's right.

And if it is, how many of our 100 people said Nine Till Five.

Bad luck, Pam, I'm afraid that's incorrect,

which means you score the maximum of 100 points.

-Richard.

-Sorry, Pam, there's Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, Dolly Parton, Nine To Five, but no Goldie Hawn.

And no Kurt Russell, either. If he'd had a walk-on part, that would have been an amazing answer.

A credited walk-on part, yeah.

Oh, well, it wasn't to be. Halfway through the round. The scores, as they stand.

We've got everything there, from 1, where we find

Diane and Paula, up to 5,

where Emma and Richard are.

32, Nathan and Damian, pretty strong there, right up to 100,

I'm afraid, where Pam and Andrew currently are.

Andrew, I'm really hoping you've got a fantastic pointless answer

lurking there somewhere.

You've got a Kurt Russell film,

I know you have. We're coming back down.

Can the second players take their places at the podium?

OK, Goldie Hawn or Kurt Russell films.

Andrew, you are the high scorers,

on 100.

What Pam needs from you now

is a fabulous low score.

Well, Pamela is going to be very disappointed.

Unfortunately, I was in the same boat as Pamela.

My two answers have both gone.

So, I'm going to guess that Kurt Russell has been in some sort of

fighting, war-type films. Don't even know what era it would be,

but I'll say, Platoon.

Please can Kurt Russell be in Platoon? Let's see if that's right

and, if so, how many people said Platoon.

No red line for you, cos you're the highest scorers. Platoon.

-ALL:

-Oh!

Bad luck, Andrew. It's a good guess, but also a bad guess.

It's an incorrect answer, causing you the maximum of 100 points,

taking your total to an unbeatable 200, I'm sorry to say. Richard.

Sorry, Andrew, he's not in Platoon.

It's Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda and Dolly Parton that are in that.

-Paula... You're through to the next round.

-Hurrah!

Even if you score 100, you won't overtake Andrew and Pam on 200,

so that takes some pressure off. Maybe see if you can find a pointless answer

somewhere at the back of your mind.

I think Goldie Hawn was in a film called Housesitter.

That sounds great.

Let's see if that's right. No red line, you're through.

Housesitter. How many people said it?

It's right.

It's right... Looks like it's going a long way down...

That's 2, brilliant!

APPLAUSE

Gives you a total of 3.

I told you Diane and Paula weren't going to muck around today.

That's a brilliant score. 1992, Housesitter, with Steve Martin.

Now, then...Damian, Nathan - you are through to the next round.

-That's the good news. Damian...

-I've got a choice of two.

One from each. But I think they're going to be quite high.

-I'm going to go for Wildcats.

-Wildcats.

-That's probably what you were trying to think of, Andrew.

-It is.

That's the one.

-Better ask - is that Goldie Hawn or Kurt Russell?

-Goldie Hawn, sorry.

So it probably wasn't the one you were thinking of!

I was thinking that was a war thing and then suddenly, nyah...maybe not.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many people said Wildcats.

It's right.

Well done, Damian... Oh, look at that!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Look at that!

That's pointless. It adds £250 to today's jackpot,

takes the total up to £2,250.

It also scores you nothing and leave your total at 32.

Very well done, Damian.

Brilliant work. Our two returning pairs on fire.

From 1986, she plays someone who takes over an inner-city high school football team,

the Wildcats.

-First ever film of Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes.

-Really?

-Yep.

-There we are. Now, Richard,

there is good news - you're through to the next round.

Possibly slightly less good news is we require an answer from you, just for form's sake.

We're looking for Goldie Hawn and/or Kurt Russell films.

The one I think will probably,

hopefully, be pointless would be The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes.

-From Disney.

-The Computer...?

-Wore Tennis Shoes.

-The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes?

-I think so.

The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes.

My Kurt Russell/Goldie Hawn knowledge is rubbish.

The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes - this surely, has got be pointless, hasn't it?

-Hope so.

-Well, let's see if it's right, first.

If it is, let's see how may people said The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes.

It IS right.

It is right. This could go a long way down, something tells me.

and it does!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

That's brilliant. A pointless answer.

It adds another £250 to today's jackpot

and takes the total up to £2,500.

It scores you nothing, it leaves your total at 5.

Have you seen The Computer Wore Tennis Shoes?

It's an amazing answer - it is a Disney film from 1969.

It's about a computer who wears tennis shoes. Or used to.

Used to wear tennis shoes and wouldn't wear them

because of a traumatic incident.

Then it's about a high school coach played by Goldie Hawn,

funnily enough, a very early role for her,

and Kurt Russell plays, let's say... a computer maintenance engineer.

-And former tennis pro.

-Brilliant.

And they win the mixed doubles at Wimbledon.

Against John Newcombe and Billie Jean King. It a very, very moving ending.

I'm going to watch that.

And at the end, Kurt Russell looks at the computer,

and the computer goes, "Well...played...buddy,"

and it's just...like that. It's absolutely lovely.

So that aside, it is a terrific answer.

Two pointless answers in a row in the first round.

Let's take a look at some more pointless answers,

see if you got any of these at home.

Deceived is a Goldie Hawn film.

She's also in Woody Allen's Everyone Says I Love You.

She sings in that as well. She's also in Foul Play with Chevy Chase.

Poseidon - Kurt Russell is in the remake of the Poseidon Adventure.

Goldie is in Protocol. Silkwood, that's Kurt Russell with Meryl Streep.

Sugarland Express - very early Steven Spielberg film.

Goldie Hawn is in that.

She's also in The Duchess And The Dirtwater Fox,

and Kurt Russell was in the Tom Cruise movie, Vanilla Sky.

There are three films that they both appeared in - Overboard, they're both in.

Swing Shift. And I have to look at this one -

The One And Only, Genuine, Original Family Band.

Well done if you worked out any of those as well.

Thank you very much, Richard.

So at the end of Round One,

the losing pair with the highest score - it's Pam and Andrew.

-Oh. You join our 200 club.

-Thank you.

-This is good.

You're going out in a blaze of glory - it's good.

Next time, we'll see you go all the way through to the final, I have absolutely no doubt.

-We look forward to that. Andrew, Pam, thank you so much for playing.

-APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

APPLAUSE

Obviously, there's only room for two pairs in our head-to-head,

so one team will be leaving us at the end of this round.

Our category for Round Two is...

Can you decide in your pairs who'll go first and who'll go second?

Whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, so our Round Two question concerns...

Famous scientists and their countries of birth, Richard.

We'll show you six on each pass - you tell us in which modern-day country they were born.

Give us a nice, obscure answer, to score fewer points, but give us a wrong one - it'll be 100.

12 for you to get at home. As always, by country, we mean a member of the UN,

-which is a sovereign state in its own right.

-Thank you very much, Richard.

So we're looking for the modern-day name of the countries in which

these famous scientists were born. We have got...

I'll read those one more time...

There we are. Richard, what do you make of that little lot?

Um... I can guess two. Or three.

Do you KNOW any? For sure?

-Yes, I think I know one.

-OK.

I think I'll have to go safe

with Aristotle and Greece.

Aristotle and Greece, you are saying. Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer.

It is right.

60.

APPLAUSE

60 - not bad.

Better than 100, and it might be a tricky round

for a few people. So 60 might not be a bad score by the end of it.

-Nathan, how are you feeling about this?

-Not confident.

The one I'm going to go for is probably going to be quite high,

but I'm going to go for Pierre Curie -

-France.

-Pierre Curie, France. Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer.

It's right.

49.

APPLAUSE

49 not bad at all. Richard?

Born in Paris in 1859, Pierre Curie. You're a scientist yourself, Nathan?

Doesn't really help, though.

Diane? You're the last person to have this board,

so you can talk us through all of these famous scientists.

I don't know any, so I'm going to have a guess at Wilho...

Wilhelm Rot...Rontgen...?

Erm...!

-And Germany.

-Seems reasonable.

Wilhelm Rontgen - was it Germany?

If it was, how any people knew that answer?

Very well done, Diane.

Look at that - down it goes - best answer of the round. Brilliant.

20 to Diane for Wilhelm Rontgen - Germany.

Best score of the round for the discoverer of the X-ray, Wilhelm Rontgen.

Let's take a look through the rest of the board.

Hideki Yukawa is probably the least known,

but I think a lot of people guessed Japan.

He's probably the least known there

but probably the most interesting of all the scientists on that board.

-Do you know what he discovered?

-Shreddies?

I'm trying to have a serious discussion.

He is the man who invented The Computer That Wore Tennis Shoes.

-There you go.

-That was Hideki Yukawa.

Well done if you knew that at home.

Dennis Gabor is the man who invented the hologram.

He was born in Hungary for 5 points. And the best answer

would've scored you 1 point - Francis Beaufort - after whom the wind scale is named.

He was born in what is now the Republic of Ireland.

Would've scored you just 1 point.

Very, very well done if you got all six.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

We're halfway through the round - let's see those scores.

Lovely low score from Diane.

So Diane and Paula looking very strong on 20.

Up to 49, where we find Nathan and Damian, and then 60

is where Richard is - Aristotle absolutely right,

but quite a costly correct answer there.

Emma, we need a nice obscure answer if we're going to see you in the head-to-head.

Best of luck with that.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, we're going to put six more famous names on the board

and we have got...

Alessandro Volta.

That's John Travolta's... lesser-known brother.

Ernest Rutherford, Louis Pasteur,

Albert Einstein, Marie Curie

and Alfred Nobel.

I'll read those one more time...

There we are. We are looking for the modern-day names of the countries

in which these famous scientists were born.

Paula, you're on 20 - the highest scorers on 60 are Emma and Richard.

If you can score 39 or less, you are definitely in the next round.

Erm...

not sure, but I'm going to go with Alessandro Volta and say Spain.

Alessandro Volta - Spain.

OK, here's your red line.

Get below that line, you're through to the head-to-head. Best of luck.

Alessandro Volta - is Spain right?

If it is, how many people said it?

Ooh, bad luck.

That's an incorrect answer,

which scores you the maximum of 100 points.

That takes your total up to 120. Damian, you're on 49.

The highest scorers are now Paula and Diane on 120.

If you can score 70 or less, you are through to the next round.

I'm going to have a stab in the dark at Alessandro Volta - Italy.

Alessandro Volta.

Is it right, Italy?

And if it is, how many people said it?

It's right.

You're in the head-to-head.

20.

20 takes your total up to 69.

Very well played, Damian.

Safely through.

Born in Como in 1745, was instrumental in the invention of the electric battery.

OK, thank you very much indeed. Emma - moment of truth.

Paula and Diane are on 120, you're on 60.

A score of 59 or less will keep you in the game.

Remember, we need the modern-day names of the countries in which these famous scientists were born.

Talk us through the board if you like.

I've never heard of the second one.

The third one,

Louis Pasteur, I'll probably guess, with the name Louis, France.

Albert Einstein - Germany, I think.

That Marie one - don't know that one.

Alfred Nobel - I'll guess at Norway

and I'm going to have that as my answer.

Alfred Nobel - Norway.

Here's your red line.

If Alfred Nobel and Norway gets you below that red line,

you are through to the head-to-head. Good luck. Is it right?

And if it is, how many people said Alfred Nobel - Norway?

Oh...bad luck, Emma. Bad luck.

That's an incorrect answer.

Scores you the maximum of 100 points

and takes your total up to the new high of 160. Richard.

A good wrong answer, if there is such a thing.

He was born in Sweden, actually. But the Nobel organisation has strong ties to Norway.

If you'd said Louis Pasteur, France,

you'd still have been knocked out, cos that would have scored 66,

but funnily enough, if you'd said Albert Einstein, Germany,

you'd be through, because it's only 38 points.

Pierre Curie we found out was born in France, but Marie Curie - born in Poland.

Would've scored you 4 points.

And Ernest Rutherford is a pointless answer.

-America?

-New Zealand.

-Pointless answer - well done if you said that.

-Thanks, Richard.

So at the end of Round Two, the losing pair with the highest score,

Emma and Richard, it's you.

As Richard said,

that was a good wrong answer. You can leave with your heads held high.

Any tips you're going to take away from your first appearance?

Just probably have a guess, rather than... Cos it was a good guess.

I'm glad I went for it.

You played so well, very strong in the first round - a pointless answer from Richard.

Lovely low score from you, Emma. We look forward to seeing you next time.

Emma and Richard, thanks so much.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining two pairs,

things are getting even more exciting as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Nathan and Damian, Diane and Paula.

You are now only one round away from the final

and the chance to win our jackpot, which currently stands at £2,500.

APPLAUSE

Obviously, only one pair can play for that money.

To decide which pair it'll be, you're going to go head-to-head.

For each question, you'll be shown five options on the board.

Each pair needs to answer just one of them, but you're allowed to confer.

All you have to do is score less than the other pair to win that question.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for the jackpot.

Let's play head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question.

It concerns...

Richard.

We'll show you five photographs of people whose surname begins with Z.

You just have to give us the most obscure of those, please.

Thanks very much, Richard. Now, Nathan and Damian,

you've played best throughout the show so far, so you get to go first.

Let's reveal our five people whose surnames begin with Z

and we have got...

There is our Z list.

LAUGHTER

Nathan and Damian, you have to find the most obscure of those -

the one you think the fewest of our 100 people knew.

(I think the first one's Billy Zane.

-(Think it's Aldo Zilli.

-Just do the first one.)

-We're going to go for A - we think that's Billy Zane.

-A.

Billy Zane.

OK. Thank you very much. Diane and Paula.

You can talk us through the whole board, if you like,

before submitting your final answer.

-(It's Aldo Zilli.

-OK.)

We know two of them. And we're going to go for B, who's Aldo Zilli.

Aldo Zilli. So we have Billy Zane and Aldo Zilli.

Nathan and Damian, you have gone for A - Billy Zane. You're saying A is Billy Zane.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

It's right.

Ooh, it's a good answer - look at that. 19 for Billy Zane.

So 19 is what you have to beat with Aldo Zilli, who you're saying is B.

B, Aldo Zilli - is that right?

If it is, how many people said Aldo Zilli?

It's right.

Ooh, well done! You've done it - 8.

8 for Aldo Zilli - very well done.

After one question, Diane and Paula are up 1-0. Richard.

Well played, Diane and Paula. One answer on the board would've beaten Aldo Zilli -

we'll get to that.

There's Billy Zane, 19. Aldo Zilli, 8.

C is Renee Zellweger - that was the highest scorer up there,

would've scored you 47.

D would've won the points -

that's the president of South Africa since 2009, Jacob Zuma.

Would've scored you 1 point.

And E is the former Chelsea striker,

Gianfranco Zola.

He would have scored you 11.

Can I just say...

that doesn't really look like Renee Zellweger.

Do you not think? To be fair, that's cos you're looking at Jacob Zuma.

Oh, THAT'S her there. Oh, yes. Yep.

Yep. Fair enough. OK, here's your second question. Nathan and Damian,

you have to win this one to stay in the game.

Here comes your second question - it concerns...

THEY GIGGLE

Anything you'd like to share with us, ladies?

Why are you laughing at that?

We rib somebody at work, cos he hates Oliver Twist, and we say, "What would you do not to read it?"

And he goes, "Anything!" Like that. He's never heard it,

so he doesn't even know that's a song in it.

..Richard.

LAUGHTER

This time we're going to give you five clues

to facts about Oliver Twist.

-The most obscure facts win you the points.

-Thank you very much.

Let's reveal our five clues to facts about Oliver Twist, and we've got...

I'll read those one more time...

So there are your five clues to facts about Oliver Twist.

Diane and Paula, you go first this time.

We're going to go with the name of Bill Sikes' dog, which is Bull's-eye.

Bull's-eye. Bull's-eye for Bill Sikes' dog.

Nathan and Damian, you can talk out loud if you like,

go through the rest of the board.

Hopefully it was written by Charles Dickens. But...!

Shall we go for century published? 19th century.

OK, 19th century.

So we have Bull's-eye for Bill Sikes' dog

and the 19th century for the century in which it was written.

Diane and Paula, Bull's-eye - is it right? How many people said it?

It's right.

20.

20 for Bull's-eye.

Nathan and Damian, 20 is what you've got to beat to stay in the game.

Very best of luck.

19th century - Nathan and Damian have said was the century in which

it was written. Is that right and, if it is, many people said it?

It is right. Down it goes.

Ooh!

Bad luck.

38.

Which means, after only two questions,

Diane and Paula are through to the final, 2-0. Richard.

Tough luck, guys. You played well throughout and last time, as well.

Two head-to-heads. But very well done, Diane and Paula.

Let's fill in the rest of the board.

Nathan, you're quite right - Charles Dickens. That's a relief!

Would have scored 77, so plenty of people who DON'T know that.

The name of the parish beadle is Mr Bumble.

That would've scored you 10 points.

You also would have won the point if you'd given us the best answer

on the board, which is the real name of the Artful Dodger.

Jack Dawkins would have scored 4 points,

so very well done if you said that at home.

Thank you very much, Richard.

So the losing pair at the end of the head-to-head is Nathan and Damian.

We've come to the end of the road.

But you made it through to the head-to-head last time, with another very, very close...

-Still no trophy.

-Come back in a disguise another time.

I'll just wear a dress.

That would do it.

Fantastic. Sorry, I'm just getting that picture out of my head!

You've been brilliant, played fantastically in both shows,

and I'm sorry that we won't see you through to the final. Nathan and Damian, thanks so much.

APPLAUSE

But for Diane and Paula, it's now time for our Pointless final.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Diane and Paula. You have fought off all the competition

-and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

-BOTH: Hurray!

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £2,500.

APPLAUSE

The rules are very simple. To win that money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

We've had two pointless answers today.

You only have to find one more and you'll go home with that money.

First you have to choose a category from these five options. They are...

What do you think?

-You're good at Children's Books.

-What if it's awful?

-Might be awful.

Let's try it anyway.

-OK.

-Can we have Children's Books, please?

-Children's books.

-It's what you said.

-Yes, it might come back to bite me in the...

Remind us what your strong areas are in children's literature.

Harry Potter, crossover ones...

books you can read as an adult.

You said that before, and I was thinking, "What does crossover mean?"

But now you've explained. Good, thank you.

Let's find out what the question is. Very best of luck.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name...

-Richard.

-Well, it's a Potter, if that helps.

We're looking for any specific character

mentioned in the title of any of the 23 tales of Beatrix Potter, please.

It has to be a real character's name, so not, for example, Two Bad Mice -

just a specific name mentioned in one of the books by Beatrix Potter.

-When those books have more than one character in the title, we'll accept either of those characters.

-OK.

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £2,500 is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-You ready?

-Yes.

-OK. Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

There's The Tale Of Jeremy Fisher, who was a frog.

The Tale Of Tom Kitten, who was a kitten!

Then there's Jemima Puddle-Duck.

-That'll be popular.

-Peter Rabbit.

-Yeah.

-Mrs Tiggy-Winkle, who I love.

She's my favourite.

-I think the first two...

-Maybe just say Mrs Tiggy-Winkle as a...

-So, Jeremy Fisher, The Tale Of Tom Kitten, Mrs Tiggy-Winkle.

-Yeah.

-There we are.

We'll stop the clock. Fantastic.

You didn't even need the full minute.

You've come up with three answers.

We were looking for eponymous tales of Beatrix Potter...

characters who feature in the title. I now need your three answers.

We're going to go for The Tale Of Jeremy Fisher...

-Jeremy Fisher.

-..The Tale Of Mrs Tiggy-Winkle...

-Mrs Tiggy-Winkle.

-..and The Tale Of Tom Kitten.

-And Tom Kitten.

-Of those three, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Jeremy Fisher.

-We'll put him last. Your least likely?

-Miss Tiggy-Winkle.

We'll put her first. OK. We'll put them up on the board in that order.

Here they are. Mrs Tiggy-Winkle, Tom Kitten and Jeremy Fisher.

We were looking for eponymous Beatrix Potter books.

Your first answer, Mrs Tiggy-Winkle, is your least confident shot at a pointless answer.

Remember, you only have to find one pointless answer to win that £2,500 jackpot.

Mrs Tiggy-Winkle, is that right? If it is, let's see how many people said Mrs Tiggy-Winkle.

It's right.

Down it goes.

If this goes all the way down to 0, you will be leaving here with £2,500.

Still going down into the 30s, 20s...

Teens... Whoa - 16.

APPLAUSE

16 for Mrs Tiggy-Winkle. Unfortunately not a pointless answer.

You only have two more chances to win that jackpot. What you think?

-Is that a fair score?

-It was lower than I thought.

-A lot lower.

OK. Now, 2,500 quid, what would you do with that?

I'd put a deposit on a new car, because mine's a bit of a shed.

Bit of a shed! ..How about yours? How about yours?!

-How about your car, Diane?

-My car's all right!

-Good!

-How about you, Diane?

-I'm booking a holiday. Caribbean. Yes.

-Very good.

Very best of luck. Let's hope you can do that.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer. The Tale Of Tom Kitten.

Tom Kitten.

This has to be correct and pointless if you're going to win that jackpot,

so for £2,500, how many people said Tom Kitten?

It's also right.

Mrs Tiggy-Winkle went down to 16.

How much further down do you think Tom Kitten is going to go?

If it goes all the way to 0, you will leave here with...

Oh. 6. 6!

APPLAUSE

It's a great answer, though. Only one more chance, though.

This next one has to be pointless if you're going to win today's jackpot.

We're looking for Beatrix Potter - eponymous book titles.

Your last answer was Jeremy Fisher. Let's see if that's right.

This was your most confident answer.

It has to be correct and it has to go all the way down to 0 and if it does both of those things,

you'll be leaving here with £2,500. Is Jeremy Fisher pointless?

Well, he's right.

16 and 6.

It's all moving in the right direction, down it goes.

If this goes down to 0...

Ooh! No! 9...

for Jeremy Fisher!

APPLAUSE

Three great answers there, but, unfortunately, you didn't manage

to find that all-important pointless answer, so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £2,500,

which rolls over to the next show. You've been brilliant contestants

and of course you do take home our Pointless trophy, so very well done.

APPLAUSE

-Richard.

-You played so well, particularly in the head-to-head.

I'll show you all the pointless answers now. I suspect you'll know some of them. I hope not.

Little Pig Robinson was a pointless answer, Cecily Parsley,

from Cecily Parsley's Nursery Rhymes.

Ginger from The Tale Of Ginger And Pickles - all of those, pointless.

Mr Tod, the villainous fox, and Mrs Tittlemouse - pointless.

Pickles from The Tale Of Ginger And Pickles, also pointless.

Pigling Bland, Samuel Whiskers, Timmy Tiptoes.

But I suspect some people got those at home, so well done if you did.

Thank you very much, Richard. You knew some of those, didn't you?

If you'd used the full minute, might you have remembered them?

-It's very hard to know, isn't it?

-Probably not, to be fair.

-Hard to pick which one is going to be pointless.

-It is.

Unfortunately, we do have to say goodbye to you. It's been brilliant having you on the show.

-Thank you so much for playing. Brilliant.

-BOTH: Thank you.

APPLAUSE

Unfortunately, Diane and Paula didn't win our jackpot today,

so it rolls over, which means on the next show,

we will be playing for £3,500.

-ALL:

-Ooh!

-Join us to see if someone can win it. Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And goodbye from me - goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd