Episode 44 Pointless

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thanks very much.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the quiz show where the aim is to score as few points

as you possibly can.

To do that, you need to come up with the answers that no-one else

can think of. Let's meet today's players.

So first up, we welcome Phil and Trev.

Phil, how do you two know each other?

Trev and I met in 1975,

when we both joined the police cadets in Staffordshire.

We did our time, we served our time...

-As police officers...

-Yes!

And we retired five years ago.

What would you like to do with your retirement, Trev?

I have a part-time job. During the day, we look after

our grandsons and that's a pretty much full-time job.

It's easier to be in the service, actually!

Trev, what do you hope will come up today?

Prime ministers who like Status Quo would be quite good for me.

OK.

Prime ministers who like Status Quo.

Absolutely.

OK, Phil and Trev, welcome to the show, great to have you.

Next, we welcome Tom and Dave, who were on the show last time.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final.

This is your last chance. Tom, remind us how you know each other.

We're housemates, we go to university together.

And Dave, what happened last time?

We did OK on the first round and in the second, we joined the 200 club.

You did really well in the first round.

The second round was albums. UK number-one albums.

With one-word titles, is that right?

Yes, that is correct.

Why were you so rubbish at that?

We hadn't seen Top Of The Pops 2 lately.

-It was all proper old music, so...

-There was a bit of new music there.

On my board, the most recent year was 1996, and I was like, four.

Uh!

What am I supposed to do?

Anyway, listen - we'll have some up-to-the-minute stuff today,

-I'm sure. What would you like it to be?

-Um, football again, Pokemon.

I like my Pokemon. Er...

I drink a lot of milk, so I'll go for dairy products...

What?!

Tom, back a bit.

You drink a lot of milk?

Yes. I drink about six to eight pints a day of milk.

And I pay for them.

How are your calcium levels?

Pretty high, I think.

Also my blood pressure is very high for my age

and I've got the cholesterol level of an obese 50-year-old.

It's the gift that keeps on giving, isn't it?

Very best of luck to you, Tom and Dave.

And next, we welcome Ruth and Neil.

How do you two know each other, Neil?

Ruth and I work together in the same bank.

I'm Ruth's manager.

Ruth does all the work, I take all the credit.

It works out pretty well, for me.

And where is this, Ruth?

So we both used to work together in Cardiff,

but I recently moved to London a couple of months ago,

so luckily I only have to speak to Neil on the telephone these days!

Now, Ruth, what do you like to get up to

when you're not working at the bank?

In Cardiff, I used to be a Girl Guide leader,

so a lot of craft, camping...

But I've moved to London, so I left my Guide unit behind in Cardiff.

-That was irresponsible.

-I know!

Neil, what do you get up to?

I'm a big music fan, so I'm hoping for some music rounds today.

Go to Glastonbury most years.

So music, festivals, travel.

Camping equipment!

Camping equipment would be fantastic.

Neil and Ruth, a warm welcome to the show, lovely to have you here.

Finally, we welcome Anne and Vicki - how do you two know each other?

This is my mum, so I've known her all my life.

All your life. Where are you from?

Cambridge.

-And what you do?

-I'm a singing teacher.

What sort of singing do you teach?

Any sort of technique from rock stars up to opera stars.

What do you like to get up to, Vicki?

I like musical theatre, so going to see shows, concerts,

watching TV at the moment. That comes up.

I've watched a lot of Jeremy Kyle recently,

so anyone that's been on that...

OK. Any of those kinds of subjects...

It's been a while since we had a fight.

-It has.

-Yeah.

We are due one, aren't we?

Yes, God. Yes, I should think any day now.

Oh, remind me at the end of the show I need to tell you something

about your wife?

Now...

Did you see the episode of Jeremy Kyle the other day

about the guy who drinks eight pints of milk every day? Whoo!

Good. A warm welcome to both of you.

We'll find out more throughout the show as it goes along.

There's only one person for me left to introduce, he sniffs out

obscurity like a hungry dog with the smell of food in its nostrils.

It's my Pointless friend, Richard.

Hiya.

APPLAUSE

Hi, everyone. Hello.

-Good afternoon.

-Good afternoon to you.

We've got two coppers on podium one, haven't we?

I don't buy all this retired nonsense. They never retire.

Look at the two of them.

Have you noticed Trev does that thing, he pretends to be smiley

and all that.

Imagine sitting across an interrogation table from Trev.

That smile comes on, then Phil wanders in with a cup of tea

and Trev goes just mental.

-You can imagine, can't you?

-Good cop, bad cop.

You might be playing good contestant, bad contestant.

Bad cop, worse cop!

Round one today is guaranteed to make everyone go, "Oo!"

-How about that?

-OK.

Round one, that's going to be the reaction.

All our questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

To get through to the final round

and be in with a chance to win the jackpot, our contestants

need to find the obscure answers those 100 people didn't get.

So the fewer of the 100 people who knew the answer, the fewer points you score.

What everyone's trying to do is find a pointless answer -

an answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add another £1,000 to that,

so today's jackpot starts off at £2,000.

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, in this first round, each of you must give me one answer

and you cannot confer.

Whichever pair has the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated,

so make sure that's not you. Our first category today is...

Words.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second.

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many words

ending in "..oo" as they could.

-Words ending in double "O". Richard.

-We're looking for

any word which has its own entry in the Oxford Dictionary of English

that ends "oo". As always, no hyphenated words or proper nouns.

Very best of luck. Lots of good words in this round.

Lots of good words to have a go at at home here.

OK, Phil and Trev, you all drew lots before the show

and today you are going to go first

and Phil, you have stepped up to the podium first.

Racked my brain and I can come up with igloo.

Igloo, says Phil. Let's see if it's right,

let's see how many people said igloo.

Absolutely right.

17.

Sounds good to me. 17 for igloo.

Well done. The Inuit word for a dome-shaped house,

usually built out of blocks of solid ice.

Tom.

Um... I think it's a word - kazoo.

Kazoo, says Tom. Kazoo.

Let's see how many people said kazoo.

Is it right?

Absolutely right.

Oh, Tom!

Very, very well done indeed. Kazoo scores you 1.

Good answer, Tom. A very simple, small musical instrument.

Makes a funny noise.

Yeah!

Neil. Remember, we're looking for words ending in "oo".

Ruth is generally better at these types of rounds,

so I'll play it safe and go for tattoo.

Tattoo, says Neil.

Let's see if that's right. How many people said tattoo?

3! Wow.

Incredible.

Tattoo.

Got a tattoo?

Yeah.

No, I haven't. I haven't.

Why is a tattoo either something you have inked permanently...

Remember that, kids - permanently!

Permanent - they're there for ever!

-But they are COOL.

-Yeah.

Yes, or a sort of military...tournament.

-Why does one word mean two different things?

-Yes, I know,

but is there any link between the two? Any link at all?

Nope.

So then, Vicki - we come to you.

Fortunately, no-one has stolen my word - I only had one.

I'm hoping it'll be fairly low.

-Taboo.

-Taboo.

Someone was going to say it(!)

OK, let's see if it was right and if it is, how many of our 100 people said taboo.

It's right.

4.

4 for taboo.

Yes, something you're forbidden from mentioning or doing

for religious or social reasons.

OK, we're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

Tom and Dave, wonderful low score there from you, Tom.

Looking very strong on one.

Up to 3, where we find Neil and Ruth.

Up to 4 where we find Vicki and Anne and then up to 17,

where we find Phil and Trev.

Phil paying the price there of going first.

Always the way with these words rounds, I think.

Luckily, he's got Trev to back him up, so Trev,

if anyone can save you, I'm sure it's you.

Best of luck. We'll come back down the line now -

can the second players please take their places at the podium.

OK, we're looking for words ending in "oo", Anne.

The high scorers are Trev and Phil on 17,

you're on 4. A score of 12 or less sees you through to the next round.

I have two possibles, one I'm sure of...

Hullabaloo.

Oh, she's good. Hullabaloo. Here is your red line.

If you get below that red line, you are through to the next round.

Is it right? How many people said hullabaloo?

It's right.

Phew!

Very well done! 3 for hullabaloo.

Takes your total up to 7.

Yes, a commotion or a fuss.

Well done on the final podium, Anne and Vicki.

Now then, Ruth.

You're on 3, the high scorers are still Trev and Phil on 17.

A score of 13 or less sees you through to the next round.

Well, I had two in my head as well.

One of them a safe bet, one a bit more of a gamble.

Hullabaloo was going to be my gamble,

so I'll go with the one I think should be a safe bet and say cuckoo.

Cuckoo, says Ruth. Cuckoo.

How many people said that?

It's right.

You've done it! 3.

3 for cuckoo.

Takes your total up to 6.

Exactly the same score, funnily enough.

Lots of very low-scorers on this one.

There are a lot of words that people know.

Now then, Dave.

Tom scored 1, I think what would be right, fit, neat, proper,

would be for you to score nothing.

We are looking for words ending in "oo".

Double O.

I'm going to say vindaloo.

Let's see how far down your vindaloo goes.

Is it right?

It is right.

And you're through. Oh! Very well done.

You've equalled Tom's low score of 1, takes your total up to 2. Well done indeed.

We're getting so close to pointless answers here from everybody. Well played again.

There are lots of pointless answers out there, as well.

Vindaloo, a very hot and spicy curry.

Now, Trev.

I'm afraid you are the high scorers, even before you've given your answer.

Probably to reflect where we are at the moment,

I'm going to go with poo.

LAUGHTER

I'm looking forward to your bit(!)

OK...

There's no red line for you, you've already crossed it(!)

Let's see how many people said it...

Poo.

9.

There you are, 9 takes your total up to 26.

Oh, Trev.

Really, until very recently, safeguarding our streets.

Tell you what,

I can tell you're spending plenty of time with your grandchildren.

There's plenty of pointless answers out there.

Let's see how good your memory is.

A few shows ago, we mentioned the name of a penguin in one

of the rounds which would have been a pointless answer in this round. Do you remember?

Yes.

It's called a... Yes.

I can't remember. I do remember it coming up.

It's called a gentoo.

A gentoo.

That would have been a pointless answer.

There's quite a few more. Let's take a look.

Well done to anyone who said aloo, Indian potatoes, goes very nice

with your vindaloo. Ballyhoo, a pointless version of hullabaloo.

Means much the same.

Buckaroo, which is an informal name for a cowboy.

Cockapoo.

Which of course is a mix between a cocker spaniel and a poodle.

Didgeridoo.

We all know peekaboo.

That's a pointless answer.

Smackeroo - a big kiss.

Switcheroo, to change something at the last minute,

and wallaroo, a cross between a wallaby and a kangaroo.

Even kangaroo would only have scored you five points.

There's a few other nice ones -

boohoo,

boogaloo,

wazoo,

which is an American name for your backside.

As in, boohoo, I've got a didgeridoo up my wazoo.

LAUGHTER

Yes.

Let's take a look at the worst answers, the most popular answers. Too scored 20 points.

Zoo scored 20 also.

And right at the top, on 25, loo.

Very good indeed. Thank you, Richard.

So, at the end of our first round, the losing pair with

the highest score I'm afraid, a lovely, low score as well - 26.

You'd be glad of that in any round, normally.

So listen, Trev, Phil - a great waste we have to

let you go so early, but we'll see you again next time.

Meanwhile, thanks very much for playing.

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Obviously, there's only room for two pairs in our head-to-head round, so one of the pairs

in front of me now will leave us

at the end of this round. Best of luck.

Our category for Round Two today is...

Weddings.

Can you all decide in your pairs who'll go first, who'll go second.

And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. Our question concerns...

Women who married famous men.

Women who married famous men, Richard.

On each pass, we'll show you the names of six women and the year in which they married a famous man.

Can you name that man, please?

Nice, obscure answer will score you fewer points,

but an incorrect answer as always, 100 points.

There are 12 famous men to guess in all.

OK, thanks, Richard. We're looking for the famous men who married

these women in the years shown.

We have got on our first board...

I'll read those one last time.

We've got Shakira Baksh, 1973,

Anne Hathaway, 1582,

Debbie Rowe, 1996,

Elin Nordegren, 2004,

Coretta Scott, 1953,

and Priscilla Beaulieu, 1967.

Six women, and the years in which they were married to famous men -

who were those men, Tom?

Um, I see another 100 coming. I'm not going to lie!

-I know none of them.

-Time to guess.

Bring in your faculty of reasoning.

-Look at the dates.

-Well...

I don't know any of them, so I'm going to go Anne Hathaway...

married "Man" Hathaway,

in 1582.

You know in the 16th century, they had names?

OK, let's see.

"Man Hathaway."

Is it right? How many people said Man Hathaway for Anne Hathaway?

No. Alas!

Darn it. Didn't see that one coming!

Unfortunately, that's an incorrect answer.

I'm afraid that means you score the maximum of 100 points.

Richard.

What would the odds be?!

Firstly, he's got the same surname as her...

And his first name, which isn't a first name, rhymes with hers.

And he's not famous.

I'll give you the correct answer at the end of the pass!

-Ruth?

-Well,

I'm secretly a little bit glad that they got that wrong,

because I'm not sure on any of them,

but I think I might know one - Priscilla Beaulieu -

I think did she marry Elvis Presley?

Priscilla Beaulieu, did she marry Elvis Presley, asks Ruth?

If she did, how many people knew that answer?

Absolutely right.

60.

APPLAUSE

60 it scores, but it's right.

Yes, Priscilla Beaulieu became Priscilla Presley, of course.

So remember, we're looking for the famous men who were married

to these women in the years shown.

Anne, you are the last person to have this board,

so you can talk us through all the answers.

-All of them? Every one?

-If you can.

Shakira Baksh might be Michael Caine.

Anne Hathaway is William Shakespeare.

Debbie Rowe, Michael Jackson.

I don't know the next two.

I'll go for what I'm sure of, which is Debbie Rowe and Michael Jackson.

Debbie Rowe, Michael Jackson, says Anne.

Let's see how many people knew Debbie Rowe, Michael Jackson.

Absolutely right.

21. Very well done indeed, Anne.

APPLAUSE

-Yes, well done, Anne. I can't believe that didn't last, can you?

-No!

Very weird(!) Anne Hathaway was William Shakespeare

and that scored 49 points, so you did well to avoid that.

Shakira Baksh, you're absolutely right, was Michael Caine.

That was a very good answer, would have scored 10 points.

-Ellen Nordegren - know that one?

-Tiger Woods?

Tiger Woods, famously, yeah. Absolutely. 8 points.

And Coretta Scott? Married Martin Luther King.

And that's the best answer on the board, 2 points.

Very well done if you said that.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at those scores.

Anne and Vicki, very good scoring.

Could have been even lower if you'd gone for Shakira Baksh,

but 21, good enough.

Up to 60, where we find Ruth and Neil

then up to 100, where we find Tom and Dave.

-Dave, you know what you have to do.

-Yeah.

-Very best of luck with that.

Can the second players please take their place at the podium?

OK, we're going to put six more women on the board

and here they are. We have got -

I'll read those all one last time.

We want the men married to these women in the year shown

and you're going to try and pick the one the fewest of 100 people knew.

You're on 21. The high scorers are Tom and Dave on 100.

You can score 78 or less and be sure of a place in the next round.

OK. There's a couple out there that I'm 90% on.

But I'm doubting the first names of their husbands, which is never good.

So I think I'll go with Eva Duarte and I think it's Juan Peron.

Juan Peron, says Vicki. Juan Peron. Who is your red line, nice and high.

Below that, you're through to the head-to-head.

Juan Peron, is it right? How many people said it?

Well done, Vicky. You are through to the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed. Takes the total up to 45.

Well played, Vicki. Great progress again from that final podium.

Juan Peron became president of Argentina.

And obviously, Eva Peron, better known as Evita.

So, remember, we're looking for the famous men who were married

to these women in the years shown.

Neil?

I think I know three of the ones that are left.

The high scorers are Tom and Dave on 100.

You're on 60, so 39 on this will see you through to the head-to-head.

I'm going to play the safest one, and go for Jacqueline Bouvier,

who married John F Kennedy.

John F Kennedy, says Neil, for Jacqueline Bouvier.

Here's your red line. Get below that, you're in the head-to-head.

Jacqueline Bouvier, John F Kennedy, is that right? How many people said it?

Absolutely right.

47.

47, takes your total up to 107, Richard.

Yes, just left the door open there for the final podium.

Jacqueline Bouvier became Jackie Kennedy.

Bouvier being Marge Simpson's maiden name as well.

-In an inspired piece of writing. I love that.

-Yeah.

-David, you have been thrown a slim lifeline.

-Very slim.

OK, the high scorers are now Neil and Ruth on 107. You're on 100.

Six or less sees you through to the head-to-head. Come on, Dave.

Talk us through the board.

OK, Ivana Zelnickova, I don't know.

Could be Boris Yeltsin. I don't know. That's guessing.

Sonia Maino, I've not heard of. Cynthia Powell, I've heard of.

I could probably make an educated guess at.

But I'm going to go for Clementine Hozier, Winston Churchill.

Winston Churchill, you're going to say for Clementine Hozier.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, how many people said that as their answer.

There is your red line. Very low.

Let's see if Winston Churchill gets you below that red line.

It's right.

AUDIENCE GASPS

11.

So sorry!

11, takes your total up to 111.

I'm afraid, by four points,

you are our high scorers.

Unlucky, Dave, that's a good answer.

There is one pointless answer that would've won it.

I'll take you through some of the others.

I also commend your pronunciation of Ivana Zelnickova. Very good.

But she married Donald Trump.

She became Ivana Trump, of course, and scored 22.

-Cynthia Powell. Do you know that one?

-John Lennon.

-Became Cynthia Lennon.

Absolutely. Would have scored 16. And Sonia Maino was the pointless answer.

Very tough answer, so very well done at home,

anyone who said Rajiv Gandhi. Rajiv Gandhi. Pointless answer.

Thanks, Richard. So at the end of round two,

the losing pair with the highest score, I'm afraid it's Tom and Dave.

-Tom and Dave.

-Well, Tom. Let's be fair.

-Man Hathaway.

If somebody says 1582 on a quiz, just say Shakespeare.

LAUGHTER

Or, just don't say Man Hathaway!

LAUGHTER

Anyway, Tom, Dave, I'm afraid this is the end of the Tom Dave line.

We have to say goodbye, but thanks very much for playing, Tom and Dave.

APPLAUSE

But, for the remaining two pairs, things are about to get

even more exciting, as we enter the head-to-head.

Well, congratulations Anne and Vicki, Neil and Ruth.

You are now only one round away from our final and the chance

to play for the jackpot which currently stands at £2,000.

APPLAUSE

You're now going to go head-to-head

and the first pair to win two questions will play for the jackpot.

The difference of course is that you are now allowed to confer.

Well, two new pairs in the head-to-head.

Anne and Vicki, very impressive low scoring answering

throughout those first two rounds.

Particularly that last round. How are you feeling?

Feel better now that we can talk to each other.

We kind of complement each other, so it's better to be together.

You can COMPLIMENT each other, of course. Go ahead and do that.

You've been wonderful!

Neil and Ruth, you are looking fabulous!

Neil, have you been working out?!

LAUGHTER

You're looking all kind of hench!

NEIL LAUGHS

Anyway, so, yes, you can now put your heads together.

Anything can happen. Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here comes your first question. And it concerns -

Human organs, Richard.

You'll see five pictures of organs normally found in the human body.

Can you identify them, please?

OK, thanks very much indeed.

Let's reveal our five human organs, and here they are. We have got -

There we are. Five human organs.

Anne and Vicki, you've played best

throughout the show so far, so you go first.

THEY CONFER INAUDIBLY

We're not very good at science.

Probably should've brought my dad along for that.

But we're hoping if we say one, they won't know any of the others. Sorry!

So we're going to go E and brain.

E and brain.

Neil and Ruth. Do you hear what they said?

They thought you wouldn't know any others.

I think we've got an idea on three of the others.

A is the stomach, B is the liver.

I think my liver doesn't look as healthy as that!

Not sure on C, maybe the gallbladder.

So, I think we're going to go for B and liver.

B, liver. So, we have E, brain and B, liver.

Anne and Vicki have said E, brain.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said brain for E.

ALEXANDER LAUGHS

It's not 100!

No, it's not 100.

No, it's absolutely not 100.

Neil and Ruth have said liver, for B.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

It's right, and you've won the question. 67.

APPLAUSE

All of which means, after one question, Neil and Ruth are up 1-0.

Well played. Took us very nicely through some of the others as well.

Because A is the stomach. That would've scored you 59.

Even more impressively, C is the gallbladder.

-That would've scored you 20. And did you have a guess for D?

-Lung?

It's not actually, it does look like a lung, and you can see why,

with the vein and the artery coming out, but it's actually the spleen.

Would've scored you 6 points. It's the best answer on the board.

Your second question, Anne and Vicki, you have to answer

this question to stay in the game. Best of luck, here it comes.

It concerns the Eurovision Song Contest.

Now, Richard.

We'll show you five questions about the Eurovision Song Contest.

Can you pick the most obscure answer?

OK, thanks very much.

Let's reveal our five things about the Eurovision.

I'll read all those one last time.

There we are. Five clues to facts about Eurovision.

Neil and Ruth, you go first this time.

So, I said I was hoping music came up.

I wouldn't particularly class this as music

but I would say the song Abba won the contest with -

-Waterloo.

-Waterloo,

say Neil and Ruth. Waterloo.

Anne and Vicki, what are you going to say?

Talk us through the rest of the board, if you can.

We're not sure of

the first year but the Irish singer would be Dana.

Wogan would be the commentator

and Lordi won for Finland.

We are going to go with the bottom one.

-Yeah?

-You sure?

-Yes. And say, Lordi.

Lordi.

OK, right, Neil and Ruth have said Waterloo was

the song Abba won with in 1974.

Let's see if that's right and,

if it is, let's see how many people said Waterloo.

It's right.

60.

APPLAUSE

60 for Waterloo.

Anne and Vicki are saying

Lordi won for Finland with Hard Rock Hallelujah.

Let's see if it's right.

This is the question you have to win to stay in the game.

It is right. Will it beat 60?

Yes, it will.

By quite a lot. Look at that.

8 for Lordi.

APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed, Anne and Vicki.

You've clawed it back.

After two questions, you're back in the game. 1-1. Richard.

Second best answer on the board,

Anne and Vicki. Very good. It had sort of

an operatic bent to it, didn't it?

Operatic heavy metal with monster movie make-up, Lordi.

His final TV commentary for BBC, absolutely right, was Terry Wogan.

That would have scored you 57 points.

Also would have won you the point. The Irish singer, as you also said,

was Dana, who became an MEP.

That would have scored 21.

And the best answer on the board is the year of the first competition.

Well done to anyone who said 1956.

It would have scored you 5 points.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. So, here comes

your third question. The decider.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final and plays for the jackpot.

Our third question concerns...

Mythical creatures. Richard.

We're going to show you the names

of five mythical creatures with alternate letters missed out.

Can you fill in the gaps and pick out the most obscure?

Best of luck to both teams.

OK, let's reveal our five mythical creatures

with missing alternate letters.

Here they come. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Five mythical creatures.

Anne and Vicki go first again this time.

We are going to go for the fourth one down

and say Sphinx.

OK, Sphinx, say Anne and Vicki. Sphinx.

Neil and Ruth, talk us through the rest of the board.

So...

We think we know what all of the rest of them are.

I think the top one is unicorn.

I think the next one down is ogre.

Then phoenix, sphinx and leprechaun for the bottom one.

So, I think I'm going to go for

ogre.

OK, you're going to say Ogre, for the second one.

So we have sphinx and we have ogre.

In the order they were given - sphinx -

let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said sphinx.

Absolutely right.

21.

APPLAUSE

21 for sphinx.

Neil and Ruth have gone for ogre.

Is it right and, if it is, will it beat 21 for sphinx? Ogre.

It is right.

Will it go down below 21?

Oh, no, 26.

APPLAUSE

26.

Which means, Anne and Vicki, very well done. After three questions,

-you're through to the final, 2-1. Brilliant.

-And the two best answers

on the board there so very well done. Both teams

did all you could, there.

Let's fill in the scores for the others.

Unicorn would have scored you 76.

Phoenix would have scored you 51

and leprechaun would have scored you 57.

Very well done if you got all five of those.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

So, our losing pair at the end of the head-to-head, it's Neil and Ruth.

But, wow, fantastic play. It's been great having you

on the show. We'll see you again next time. We'll look forward to it. Neil and Ruth,

thanks very much for playing.

But, for Anne and Vicki, it's now time for out Pointless final.

Congratulations, Anne and Vicki, you fought off all the competition

and you have won the coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot

and at the end of today's show the jackpot stands at...

APPLAUSE

Well, you've done very, very well indeed. Lovely low scoring from you.

You weren't quite the lowest scorers in the first round

but you have been the lowest scorers in subsequent rounds.

You have shown a lot of brain and then you went

and chose brain as your human organ. This is the tough bit, though.

This is where you get a choice of five categories

and they're always pretty tricky, these ones.

So, very, very best of luck. The rules are very simple.

To win the money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

We haven't had any pointless answers today.

You only have to find one now and you will go home with that money.

Firstly, you've got to choose your category. Here are your choices. We have...

OK.

-Not Rugby.

-Not Rugby. Not Literary...

It's going to be Geography, isn't it?

-Not Elections. American Actors?

-I literally know, like, four.

-OK. European Geography.

-Shall we go with it?

-Yes.

European Geography, please.

European Geography it is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many non-EU countries

that border the EU as they could.

Richard.

We're looking for any country which is not an EU member

which shares a border with one that is an EU member.

Very, very best of luck.

OK, you now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £2,000

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-OK, let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

Where is Tajikistan?

Is that anywhere near?

I have no idea.

Would it border EU countries like the Lithuanias and the ones

-that broke off from Russia?

-Very possibly.

-Shall we go with that one?

-Uzbekistan?

-Uzbekistan has to be somewhere around there.

And then, what about...

-Is Liechtenstein a member of the EU?

-Yes. Yes, it is.

Tajikistan, Uzbekistan...

Isn't Iceland...

No, that's an island. Never mind. Carry on.

They're all European ones I'm thinking of.

So, Tajikistan, Uzbekistan. Where else is there?

What about, like, Jordan or anywhere near there?

My geography is not that good.

Jordan. You know my geography's awful. Ten seconds.

Uzbekistan, Tajikistan and think of somewhere else.

Jordan?

No, that's not...

OK. That's your time up.

We were looking for non-EU countries that border the EU.

I now need your three answers.

OK, we are not really sure on any of them. We are going to try Jordan...

-Jordan.

-..Uzbekistan...

-Uzbekistan.

-..and Tajikistan.

And Tajikistan. Of those three,

which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-I think best shot would be Tajikistan.

-Tajikistan.

OK, we'll put that last.

-Your least likely?

-Jordan.

-Jordan.

-We'll put that first.

-Yes.

OK, let's put those on the board in that order. And here they come.

We have got Jordan, Uzbekistan and Tajikistan.

OK, so we were looking for non-EU countries that border the EU.

Your least confident shot at a pointless answer was Jordan.

Remember, you only have to find

one pointless answer to win that jackpot of £2,000.

So, let's see, Jordan, is it right and, if it is,

how many of our 100 people said Jordan?

This, for £2,000.

OK, an incorrect answer. So, obviously not a pointless answer.

Which means you only have

two chances left to win our jackpot today.

Now, the jackpot is £2,000. Anne, what would you do

with your £2,000 jackpot?

-Obviously, Vicki would take half of it.

-Well, indeed.

The other half, I would give to my son to make it fair...ish.

-That's not fair on you.

-It is.

-Really?

-Yes.

-You almost got a clap there.

-Go on, clap.

A single clap there, from someone's son.

Yeah.

Vicki.

I got my leaver's ball on Friday

-so I'd go buy an expensive pair of shoes for that.

-No, she wouldn't.

Yes, I would. And then probably just save it for uni

and build a little nest egg.

OK, well, we are looking for non-EU countries that border the EU.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, Uzbekistan.

That sounds like a good answer to me. Let's see.

Uzbekistan - is it right? How many people said it? For £2,000.

Oh, bad luck.

An incorrect answer.

So, everything is now riding on Tajikistan.

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

Everything, now, rides on Tajikistan for £2,000.

Is it right?

How many people said it? Tajikistan.

-Oh, bad luck.

-Oh, well.

APPLAUSE

We are rubbish at geography.

Well, unfortunately,

you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer

but you do still get to take home our Pointless trophy.

So, very, very well done.

APPLAUSE

I'm all right with that.

You played so well throughout.

There was one point there, Anne and Vicki,

where one word just cost you £2,000.

And that's when Vicki said, "Is Liechtenstein a member of the EU?"

-Oh, no.

-And instead of saying no, you said yes.

It isn't and it would have been a pointless answer.

-It would have won you the money.

-Sorry.

-It's all right.

Funnily enough, the Uzbekistans and Tajikistans,

not the places to go on here. Uzbekistan is bordered by

Turkmenistan, Tajikistan, Kyrgyzstan, Kazakhstan.

The four pointless answers are here.

Andorra, which is nestled in the Pyrenees.

Liechtenstein would have been a pointless answer.

Moldova and San Marino.

Those were the pointless answers.

Very well done if you said any of those at home.

Plenty of people would've gone the same route

as you did of some of the former Soviet republics

but actually you want to look more inside Europe rather than outside.

Unfortunately, we have to say goodbye,

Anne and Vicki, but it's been great having you on the show.

Thank you both very, very much for playing. Great contestants.

APPLAUSE

Well, Anne and Vicki didn't win our jackpot today so it rolls over.

Which means on the next show we will be playing for £3,000.

CHEERING

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd