Episode 56 Pointless

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong.

Welcome to Pointless, the quiz show where obvious answers mean nothing

and obscure answers mean everything. Let's meet today's players.

APPLAUSE

First up, we welcome back Steve and Chris, who were on last time.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final. This is your second and final chance.

Steve, remind us how you know each other.

We met in Canterbury at uni and we work together as medieval jesters

for a local visitor attraction.

-Do you actually do that?

-Oh, yeah.

-Oh, that and more!

-That's the staple move, that one.

-What do you do as medieval jesters?

We leaflet all the passing tourists and try and get them to come in.

-We perform as well - acting, juggling and a bit of singing.

-Dancing around.

-Do you say anything?

-We've got a bit of a system going.

Either people take leaflets or they don't. If they do, it's...

BOTH: Ring the bells of merriment, pluck the harp of joy,

open the door of destiny and sail the ship ahoy!

APPLAUSE

-Then...

-But if they...

Then if they don't take the flyer, it's very sad.

-So we ring...

-BOTH: ..The bells of sorrow.

We pluck the harp of woe, slam the door of destiny,

for ne'er shall we go!

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

Let's hope it's "sail the ship ahoy" this afternoon, rather than "ne'er shall we go"!

Very good. Chris, remind us what happened last time.

We went out in the first round - Countries.

-Countries.

-I can only apologise for mindless arrogance and pointless greed.

Pointless likes a risk-taker. You put Ecuador next to Argentina,

which is a shame, cos God didn't.

-Yeah.

-It's close!

-OK.

Very best of luck. Great to have you back on the show, Steve and Chris.

I'm sure you're going to do much better today.

Next, we welcome Paul and Tina. How do you two know each other?

-Tina is my sister, Alexander.

-What do you do, Paul?

I'm a surveyor for the Ordnance Survey.

And at no point do you ever do work on the side

as a David Cameron lookalike?

-He looks SO like David Cameron, doesn't he?

-Do you think?!

-I don't think so, personally, but I have been stopped in the street...

-Oh, you've had it before?

-Yeah.

Tina, what do you do?

-I'm cabin crew.

-Your geography's going to be second to none.

-Well, that's what we're hoping.

-Are there any surprise areas of specialist knowledge that...?

-America.

-Ah!

-Yeah. I lived there for two years.

-Good stuff!

Well, a very, very warm welcome to the show, Paul and Tina. Lovely to have you here.

Next, we welcome back Lucy and Nell, who were also on the show last time.

Lucy, remind us how you two know each other.

We worked together for about six years for the Arts Council.

Now, Nell, tell us what happened last time. You did brilliantly well.

-We got through to the head to head, which shocked us both.

-It was very close.

Our round came up on Orchestra, which I thought, "Yes!"

-I knew them all, but I picked the wrong one.

-Anyway...

-What do you hope is going to come up?

-Some nature stuff.

Birds and trees and flowers and things. Know a bit about that.

Very, very best of luck to you, Lucy and Nell. Great to have you back.

And, finally, we've got Roger and Ben.

-How do you two know each other, Ben?

-Basically, Roger's my father.

-"Basically", he is your father?

-Yes.

-LAUGHTER

-Roger, what do you do?

-I'm a professional, freelance classical musician,

-playing the organ.

-Right.

OK. I'm guessing music will be a very strong suit for both of you.

Music's going to be a real blessing if we get it.

-Ben, I'm guessing, having grown up in the house of an organist, music won't have escaped you.

-It didn't.

I went into choir singing.

I was head chorister at the age of 14 at Rochester Cathedral.

-And carried it on as a hobby.

-OK.

-Roger, anything else you're hoping might come up?

-Yes.

I'm good on the Laurel and Hardy films. I'm good at the scripts,

so anything from the Laurel and Hardy films.

-Scripts? From the silent era?

-Yeah.

-LAUGHTER

-Yeah, yeah.

-Excellent.

Well, Ben and Roger, a very warm welcome to you.

We'll find out more about all of you throughout the show. Only one person left to introduce.

His knowledge is the only thing more obscure than his offshore tax investments.

-It is my Pointless friend. It's Richard.

-Hiya.

Hi, everybody.

APPLAUSE

-Well...

-What?

-How about this jackpot we've still got going on?

-Wow!

-I know.

-We are within a smidgen of the biggest amount we've given away on Pointless.

-Yeah.

-So it should be an absolute cracking show.

Big money up for grabs. It seems like we've got four good teams.

Question one, possibly the geekiest question we've ever had on Pointless.

And we've had some!

Exciting, very exciting.

All our questions on Pointless have been put to 100 people before the show.

In order to get to the final round and a chance to win the jackpot,

our contestants need to find the obscure answers those 100 people didn't get.

So the fewer of the 100 people who knew the answer, the fewer points you will score.

What everyone's trying to do is find a pointless answer.

This is an answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so we add another £1,000 to that.

So today's jackpot starts off at...

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

In this first round, each of you must give me one answer and you cannot confer with your partner.

Whichever pair has the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated.

So try and make sure that's not you. OK, our first category today is...

Chemical Elements. Can you decide in your pairs, who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

You going first, yeah?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, our question concerns...

Elements in French!

-HE LAUGHS

-Elements in French?!

-I did warn you.

-I did warn you.

-Yeah! Wow!

-How about that?

-Cor!

In this round, we'll give you seven names in French on each pass.

They're the French names for elements from the periodic table.

We need you to tell us what the English name for that element is.

Give us a nice, obscure answer, you're going to score fewer points.

An incorrect answer's going to score you 100.

There are 14 Elements in French to have a go at at home. I bet you cannot wait!

LAUGHTER

Right, Steve and Chris. You all drew lots before the show and today you get to go first.

We're looking for the English names of these French elements. Good luck.

And here's our first board.

I'll read those all one last time.

OK, there we are, seven Elements in French.

Chris, you need to find the most obscure one you think you might know the English for.

I think, if I can get my endings right,

I think brome...

is, erm, bromite.

Brome is bromite, says Chris.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many of our 100 people said bromite.

Ooh! Bad luck, Chris!

An incorrect answer, which scores you the maximum of 100 points.

Sorry, Chris. I'll give the correct answer at the end of the pass.

Tina.

It couldn't be any worse for me!

Really, it's just a pure guess.

Platinum - platine.

Platine - platinum, says Tina. Let see if that's right

and, if it is, how many people said platinum for platine.

It's absolutely right, Tina.

38!

APPLAUSE

-38 for platine.

-Yeah, well done, Tina.

The clue's in the name, platinum.

The international kilogram, that's the individual block whose weight determines what a kilogram is,

is made out of platinum and is kept in a safe in France.

-They get custody of the international kilogram?

-Yeah.

Was there a meeting?

We didn't get it because we had imperial measures for so long.

-Where's the international ounce held?

-In Coventry.

LAUGHTER

They make it out of platinum cos it doesn't react to air or water, so it stays roughly the same weight.

Whereabouts in France is the international kilogram?

It's in a safe. Or, more specifically, it's in "une sauf".

LAUGHTER

-"Une sauf"?

-Oui. That's French for "safe".

D'accord. Now, then...Nell.

So we want the English names of these French elements.

Well, I know one for definite.

So I'm going to go, and I'm really sorry,

but I think you meant to say "bromide" with a "D".

Bromide, says Nell for... Oh, go on! Say the French one.

-Brome.

-Beautifully done.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people knew that answer, bromide.

Ooh! Oh, no, Nell!

Unfortunately, another wrong answer, I'm afraid,

which means you score 100 points, as well.

-It's causing chaos, isn't it?

-Yeah, brome!

-It's like an unexploded brome.

-Oh!

-LAUGHTER

Again, I'll give the correct answer at the end of the pass.

Now, then, Roger, you're the last person to have this board.

You can take us through the board and fill in all the blanks.

That would be good, wouldn't it? This is not my strong subject.

So this is a pure guess. I'm going to go for titane,

because if Titanic was the ship, it was made of iron,

maybe titane is iron, so that's my answer.

Iron, says Roger. Let's see it that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many people said iron for titane.

Oooh!

There we are, another incorrect answer,

which means you also score 100 points. Richard.

-It's going very well, isn't it?

-Isn't it?

That is terrific. Titane, you'll be shocked to hear, is titanium.

-Much simpler than you thought.

-Yes, I was... Yes.

Would have scored you 44 points, so our 100 did well on that.

Now brome, our old friend, it's not bromide.

-It's bromine.

-Bromine.

14 points it would have scored. Both of you were one letter away from 14 points there.

-Take a look at the rest of them. Plomb.

-Lead.

-Absolutely right.

31 points that would have scored.

-"Or" is workable out. There's Palme d'Or, Carte d'Or.

-Gold.

-Gold.

Absolutely right. 32.

So our 100 did very well. Cuivre.

Now, embarrassingly, I thought that was leather.

-But I know enough, I know enough...

-LAUGHTER

..to know that leather isn't yet on the periodic table.

-I was going to say, you are learning.

-Yeah!

-That's good. It's copper.

Very well done if you said that. 11. Azote? Azote is a pointless answer.

It's nitrogen. Nitrogen. Azote is French for nitrogen.

Pointless answer, so very well done if you said that.

Thank you, Richard. Let's look at our scores, halfway through the round.

Only two scores between our four pairs. The best score of the pass...

Kind of the only score of the pass, really, is 38. Very well done, Tina,

with your lovely low score of 38.

Then Chris and Steve, Nell and Lucy, and Roger and Ben

are all absolutely like as they lie

on 100 points.

So, yeah, Ben, Lucy and Steve, it's going to be between you.

A three-way tussle. Very, very best of luck to all pairs.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, we're going to put seven more French elements on the board.

We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are. Remember, we are looking for the English names of these French elements.

Ben, you are trying to find the one the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Now, Ben, you are joint high scorer on 100 points.

You just have to score as low as you possibly can

-and hope for the best.

-There's only one that screams out to me,

which is sulfur and soufre.

Soufre - sulfur, you're saying. There's no red line for you.

You just have to hope this goes as low as it possibly can.

Soufre - sulfur, says Ben. Is it right? How many people said it?

It's right!

Very well done. 12, Ben.

APPLAUSE

That surely ought to be enough to keep you in the game. That takes your total to 112.

Yeah, well played, Ben. Sulfur, absolutely right.

We still spell it with a "ph" a lot of the time, but "f" is now how it's universally recognised.

Now, then, Lucy.

The high-scorers on 112 are now Ben and Roger.

You're on 100. If you can score 11 or less,

you'll avoid becoming the new high-scorers.

I'm not optimistic.

Any answer is going to be a risk. Erm...

I think I'm going to go for silicium and hope

that silica is somewhere on the periodic table.

You're going to say silica.

Silica for silicium. Here is your red line.

Get below that red line, you're in the next round. Best of luck.

Silica, is that right? If it is, how many people said silica?

Oooh! Bad luck, Lucy!

I'm afraid it's an incorrect answer and scores you a maximum 100 points.

And takes your total up to 200. I'm sorry.

Yeah. Sorry, Lucy. It may not necessarily be over in this round.

I'll give you the correct answer at the end of the pass.

Now, then, Paul, you are on 38.

You are through to the next round come what may.

Even if you score 100 points, you won't overtake the high score of Lucy and Nell.

However, I have a feeling you might know some of these answers.

I think I know a couple on there that haven't gone yet.

I'm going to go argent and I'm going to say silver.

Argent - silver, says Paul.

Argent - silver. No red line for you as you're already through.

Let's see if argent, silver's right. Let's see how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

32!

32 takes your total up to a nice round 70.

APPLAUSE

Well done, Paul. Of course, argent French for silver. Also French for money.

-And change.

-Exactly. And in Spanish and Hebrew, their words for money and silver are the same.

Steve, the high-scorers are Lucy and Nell on 200. You are on 100.

You have to score 99 or less to stay in the game.

The top three I haven't got a clue.

I knew silver and I think silicium is probably silicon,

as opposed to silica.

And iode, I think, must be iodine.

But I think I'll go with silicium - silicon.

Silicon, says Steve. Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

Absolutely right! Very well done, Steve.

43!

Takes your total up to 143. You are through to Round Two.

APPLAUSE

-143 the total.

-Well done, Steve. Safely through. Yeah, silica is silicon dioxide.

Once again, you can see our 100 have done very well.

Iode, absolutely right, would have been iodine. Would have scored 33.

-Fer.

-Iron.

-Iron, absolutely right. Ferrous, non-ferrous metals. 36.

-Etain...

-Tin! Tin!

-Tin.

-Absolutely right.

-Just in the nick of time!

-Would have scored you 3. And lanthane is a pointless answer.

It's lanthanum. Very well done if you said that at home.

-Again, the clue's there, if you know chemistry.

-IF you know chemistry!

-If you've heard of lanthanum, then lanthane...

-If you've heard of lanthanum!

..is yours for the taking. Thanks very much indeed, Richard. So, at the end of our first round,

the losing pair with the highest score are Lucy and Nell.

-Oh dear, oh dear! I thought you were a shoo-in for the final.

-Well...

-It all went horribly wrong!

-Should have gone for gold, but there we go.

Lucy and Nell, thank you so much for playing.

I'm sorry we have to say goodbye to you. It's been lovely having you.

You've been brilliant contestants. Lucy and Nell.

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Now, there's only room for two pairs in our head-to-head round,

so one of the pairs in front of me now will be leaving us at the end of this round.

Paul and Tina, on the strength of that, I don't think it's going to be you.

Two correct answers. That makes you unique among the surviving pairs.

Thank you.

Anyway, best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two is...

1960s Music.

Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, the question concerns...

Richard.

Yes, one of those categories we get asked for a lot, '60s Music.

In a moment, Xander's going to show you the names of six famous bands.

We need you to tell us any Top 40 hit by any of those six bands, please,

between January 1960 and December 1969.

So any Top 40 hit by any of the six bands that you're about to see. Best of luck.

OK. Our six bands are...

I'll read those all one last time.

So we are looking for any UK Top 40 single by any of these bands

-in the '60s. Steve?

-Erm...

There's a few running around in my head

and I think the one I'm going to go for may not be hugely scoring,

but I don't think it's going to be particularly low. But I'll go for it anyway.

I'll go for Little Red Rooster by the Rolling Stones.

Little Red Rooster, says Steve. Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many said it.

It's right.

2!

APPLAUSE

2, Steve. Great score!

Very well done indeed.

Yeah, it's a good, low answer. Number One single from 1964. Cover of a Willie Dixon song.

Tina.

-You did so well in that last round.

-Oh, I did!

Oh, 1960s is way before my time!

So I'm going to have to give a guess.

And say...

Jumping Jack Flash by the Rolling Stones.

Jumping Jack Flash, says Tina.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 said Jumping Jack Flash.

Absolutely right.

5!

-APPLAUSE

-I was so sure it was the '70s.

-Five for Jumping Jack Flash.

-Yeah.

-Another Number One single as well, from 1968.

-Roger.

Yes, well, I don't know any answer here.

So I'm going to choose a title.

So I'm going to say Destiny.

OK, Destiny, says Roger. Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said Destiny.

-Not a surprise!

-Bad luck, Roger. I'm afraid an incorrect answer,

which means you score the maximum of 100 points.

They say if you can remember the '60s,

you weren't there.

If you can't remember the '60s, maybe you were playing the organ in Rochester Cathedral.

LAUGHTER

I can't believe you haven't played anything by any of those people at some point.

Destiny, no, not by one of these six, I'm afraid. The Jacksons had a single called Destiny in the '70s,

but not any of these gentlemen.

OK. Thanks very much, Richard.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at the scores.

Steve and Chris looking very, very strong on 2.

Then up to 5, where we find Tina and Paul. And then up to 100,

where we find Roger and Ben, way out in front there.

Ben, whatever we have in the next pass, at the very least we need a very low score from you,

if you are to make it through to the next round. Best of luck with that.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, we are looking for UK Top 40 singles that were hits for any of these bands.

Ben, you're going to try and find the one you think the fewest of our 100 people knew.

You're the high-scorers, quite substantially in front.

This isn't my specialist subject. I only know one.

It's House Of The Rising Sun by the Animals.

House Of The Rising Sun, says Ben. Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

There's no red line for you as you are the high scorers. House Of The Rising Sun.

It's right.

30!

APPLAUSE

30 takes your total

up to an unbeatable 130. I'm sorry, Ben.

Yeah, Number One single from 1964, House Of The Rising Sun. It's a traditional America folk song.

Now, then, Paul, you are through to the next round.

I'm going to go for one I think is in the '60s, and that's

-Brown Sugar by the Rolling Stones.

-Brown Sugar, says Paul.

No red line for you, you're already through, but let's see how many people said Brown Sugar.

-Interesting.

-Yeah.

Interesting. An incorrect answer scores you 100 points.

Takes your total up to 105.

Sorry, Paul. You fell into exactly the trap you worried about. Not a hit till the '70s, Brown Sugar.

But, luckily, you're safely through, anyway.

Now, then, Chris, again, you are through to the next round.

-Maybe you might know a pointless answer.

-Erm...

I'm a huge fan of the Who. I love the Who.

And it was at a Who concert where my mum and dad met for the first time.

Aaah!

I think I'm going to go for one of their later songs, Athena.

Athena?

-Ah! A 1960s top hit?

-Yeah.

-Oh!

Athena, says Chris.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it. There's no red line for you,

as you're already through.

Athena.

Bad luck, Chris.

It scores you 100 points. Couldn't matter less, you're already through

to the next round.

-Yeah, that was 1982, I'm afraid, Chris.

-It was a much later one!

Yeah, you're not kidding!

Have you got any other Who ones you might have gone for?

-Happy Jack.

-Happy Jack would have been a pointless answer.

-Aagh!

-It would have added £250 to the jackpot.

Let's take a look at some more of the pointless answers here.

Dogs, that's another Who song.

Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood by the Animals would have won £250.

-Let's Spend The Night Together by the Stones.

-Blimey!

Magic Bus, that's the Who again. My Mind's Eye, the Small Faces.

Ruby Tuesday, another Rolling Stones' one.

Set Me Free by the Kinks. You could also have had Dead End Street,

Plastic Man, Ev'rybody's Gonna Be Happy, Autumn Almanac - all of those pointless.

Sha La La La Lee by the Small Faces and Whatcha Gonna Do About It?, also by the Small Faces.

So very well done if you said any of those at home.

Let's look at the most well-known songs by those bands in the '60s.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard. So at the end of Round Two,

the losing pair with the highest score will be leaving us.

I'm afraid it's Ben and Roger. Not a good round for you, that one.

Not for me. Ben salvaged what he could.

But I think I put him beyond a point of redemption.

We'll see you again nice time, Ben and Roger. Sorry to say goodbye so soon.

-But thanks very much for playing. Great contestants.

-Thank you.

-APPLAUSE

-But for the remaining two pairs,

things are about to get even more exciting as we enter the head to head.

Congratulations, Paul and Tina, Steve and Chris.

You're now only one round away from the final and a chance to play for the jackpot, which stands at...

AUDIENCE: Wooooh!

You're now going head to head. The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that money,

but the big news is, you are now allowed to confer.

Very, very best of luck to both pairs. Let's play the head to head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question,

and it concerns...

That's just three words.

Executive Branch Buildings. Richard.

I know, don't panic. We're going to show you five pictures of buildings that house

the executive branch of various governments, essentially important political buildings.

You have to tell us in which city would you find any of the five following buildings, please.

OK, let's reveal our Executive Branch Buildings.

And here they are. We have got...

OK, there we are. Five Executive Branch Buildings.

Paul and Tina, you've played best throughout the show so far, so you get to go first.

-(A is Moscow.)

-Or is it St Petersburg?

Erm, quite a tricky round.

But we're going to take a bit of a gamble on A,

and say St Petersburg.

St Petersburg, Paul and Tina say. St Petersburg for A.

Steve and Chris?

We were thinking A might be Moscow,

but then Moscow might be the Kremlin, actually.

Erm, it's a tricky one.

Because, obviously, B and D, you've got White House and Downing Street.

Erm...

Let's go B.

B? B the White House - Washington DC.

Washington DC, OK. Steve and Chris are saying Washington DC for B.

So Paul and Tina have said St Petersburg for A.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said St Petersburg.

Bad luck, Paul and Tina. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

Steve and Chris, that means you merely have to be correct with Washington DC for B

and you will win this question.

Yes! Obviously.

66!

APPLAUSE

Chiefly, it was correct, which means, Steve and Chris, after one question you are up 1-0.

Yeah. Well done, Chris and Steve. You were right about A as well. It is Moscow. That's the Kremlin.

Would have scored 38 points.

Now C is the Casa Rosada,

which is in Buenos Aires.

Which was a pointless answer.

So very well done if you said that.

D is 10 Downing Street, London.

That would have scored you 70.

E is the Grand Palace in Bangkok.

That would have scored you 6 points.

Thanks very much indeed. Here comes your second question, Paul and Tina.

You have to win this question to stay in the game. Best of luck.

It concerns...

-Richard.

-We're going to show you five clues to facts about Sherlock Holmes. Can you solve the clues?

OK, thanks very much indeed. Let's reveal our five clues.

We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are. Five clues to facts about Sherlock Holmes.

Steve and Chris, you go first this time.

Erm, I think we're fairly sure

-that he played the violin.

-OK.

The violin, say Steve and Chris, the violin. Paul and Tina.

-You can take us through the board, if you like.

-Ha, we'd like to!

The magazine, we have no idea.

His friend and lodger - Dr Watson.

-Violin.

-Violin.

-Erm, don't know who the street urchins are.

-No.

We're going to plump for the address, which...

we believe is 221B.

-221B, say Paul and Tina.

-..Baker Street.

221B, Baker Street.

OK, so Steve and Chris have said the violin.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many of our 100 people said violin.

Absolutely right.

69.

APPLAUSE

Paul and Tina have said 221B, Baker Street.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said it.

This is the question you have to win, Paul and Tina, to stay in the game. Best of luck.

Absolutely right.

And you've won it. Very well done.

30!

APPLAUSE

It's exactly what you needed to do, Paul and Tina. After two questions, you're evenly drawn, one-all.

-Richard.

-Very well played. A huge jackpot and now we're going to go to a decider

in the head to head as well - no pressure on anyone.

Let's take a look at the rest of these. Dr Watson, absolutely right.

That would have scored 76 points.

The magazine in which the short stories first appeared was the Strand. 6 points.

The best answer on the board, the street urchins. Do you know that one?

-I can't... I do know it.

-It's the Baker Street Irregulars.

-Irregulars!

And that would have scored 2 points. So very well done if you said that.

OK, here comes your third question. Whoever wins this question goes through to the final

and plays for that jackpot. Best of luck, both pairs!

Our third question concerns...

Richard.

We're going to show the initials of five men who've managed England since 1966,

followed by the initials of the club they were managing just before they became England manager.

Can you unscramble those initials and give us the best answer, please? Very, very best of luck, both teams.

OK, let's reveal our five managers and their former clubs.

And we have got...

I'll read all those one last time.

There we are. Five England Managers And Their Former Clubs.

Paul and Tina, you go first this time.

OK, then!

(Which one do you want to pick?)

I'm going to go SM - M.

Steve McClaren - Middlesbrough.

Steve McClaren - Middlesbrough, say Paul and Tina.

Now then, Steve and Chris, talk us through the board.

We're thinking the bottom one is Terry Venables - Tottenham Hotspur.

-The second one would be Aston Villa.

-And Leeds United for the fourth one.

Oh, would that be Don Revie?

-Yeah.

-Shall we go with him?

-Yeah, let's go.

-OK.

-Don Revie.

-Don Revie - Leeds United.

-Don Revie - Leeds United.

So we have Steve McClaren - Middlesbrough

and Don Revie - Leeds United.

Paul and Tina, have said Steve McClaren - Middlesbrough. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

6!

APPLAUSE

6...

for Steve McClaren.

Steve and Chris have said Don Revie - Leeds United.

Let's see if that's right and how many of our 100 people said that.

Don Revie is right.

Will it beat 6? It's going to be very close!

-Aagh!

-Ooh, 10!

THEY LAUGH

APPLAUSE

Very, very well played, both pairs there.

Two fantastic answers, but, Paul and Tina, you've just got it,

which means after three questions you are through to the final 2-1.

Actually, the best two answers on the board.

That's the way to qualify for a jackpot that size. Well played, both teams.

RG was West Ham United and it was Ron Greenwood. Would have scored you 11.

It is Aston Villa. It was Graham Taylor. Would have scored you 13.

And the biggest answer at the bottom Terry Venables, Tottenham Hotspur.

Well done, if you got all five of those at home.

Thanks, Richard. So our losing pair at the end of the head to head,

I'm afraid to say it's Steve and Chris.

Ring the bells of sorrow!

LAUGHTER

-Pluck the harp of woe.

-Slam the door of destiny...

-We do have to go.

-Yeah, we do.

Listen, thank you so much for playing. You've been brilliant.

This time round more than made up for last time.

And a really exciting head to head there. That was brilliantly done.

Thanks so much for playing. Steve and Chris! Great contestants.

APPLAUSE

Right, for Paul and Tina it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Paul and Tina.

You've fought off all the competition and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

And at the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at...

AUDIENCE: Whoooo!

It's almost, very nearly, one of the highest jackpots we've had on the show.

You've come through this fantastically.

You've been the low-scorers every single round and then a 2-1 victory in the head to head.

Well, very, very best of luck. To win the money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

We haven't had any pointless answers on the show today.

You only have to find one now and you will leave with that money.

First though, you've got to choose a category. You have a choice of five options. They are...

SHE SIGHS

Well...

-I think we can rule out The Government.

-Forget that one!

-Forget Playwrights.

-No way!

-Erm...

-I'm not going to be very good on Pops Stars.

-What about Sportsmen?

-I think that's my strongest subject.

What do you think?

If you weren't here, it wouldn't be a subject I'd choose.

It would be British Actresses, but I think you know Sportsmen more than I know British Actresses.

OK, then, are we going to say Sportsmen?

-Yes. I think.

-You're going to put it all on me, are you?

-I am.

-OK.

-Down to you.

-OK. We're going to go for Sportsmen.

Best of luck. Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes...

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many of the 2012 Six Nations Try Scorers

as they could.

-Richard.

-Yeah, we're looking for any player who scored a try in the 2012 Six Nations Rugby tournament.

Very best of luck.

OK, you now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £15,250 is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Yes.

OK, let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

-I'm struggling already.

-Oh, Paul, I'm relying on you!

-Shane Williams, Wales.

-Right.

-We'll go for that one.

-What about South Africa?

-No, Six Nations.

-Australia?

-Six Nations.

-That's how much I know!

-Erm...

-France, Italy.

-France, Italy.

-England. Scotland.

-Yeah.

-Ireland.

-Yeah, but we need the try scorers.

-I'm reminding you of the countries.

-Erm...

-Erm...

-Who's that one for England who...

-Erm?

-The blond one.

-Little.

-Dan... No, no!

-Erm...

-Wilkinson.

-Er, no.

Jonny Wilkinson I don't think was in the Six Nations this year.

He might have been. We'll bear that one in mind. So Shane Williams...

Erm... Go for Ronan O'Gara from Ireland. Erm...

So Shane Williams, Ronan O'Gara... Scotland?

-France?

-Scotland and France?

-Any French ones?

Yes, there are French, but I can't think of any.

Ten seconds left.

-Erm...

-Just go with one that pops in your head.

-I honestly can't think of...

OK.

There is your time up.

I'm sorry. Not nearly long enough.

No, it's isn't! It's goes very quick when you're here.

OK, so we were looking for 2012 Six Nations Try Scorers.

I now need your three answers.

-One of the answers we're going to give is Shane Williams.

-Shane Williams.

Ronan O'Gara.

-Ronan O'Gara.

-And...

There's an English rugby player... I think his name's...

Flutey, or something like that. Dan Flutey we'll go for.

Dan Flutey.

OK, of those three, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

Erm, I'm going to go for Shane Williams.

Shane Williams. OK, we'll put Shane Williams last.

-Which is your least likely?

-Dan Flutey, cos I think that's just a made-up name.

Dan Flutey. OK, let's put those up on the board in that order. And here they are...

We have got...

OK, so we are looking for Six Nations Try Scorers from 2012.

Your first answer was Dan Flutey. It was your least confident answer.

Remember, you only have to find one pointless answer to win that jackpot of £15,250.

So let's see, Dan Flutey, is it right and, if it is, how many people said it?

Ooh! Bad luck!

-Bad luck. An incorrect answer.

-It was just a guess.

Well, unfortunately, not a pointless answer, but there we are.

He was kind of just holding a place for you there, Dan Flutey.

So you only have two more chances to win today's jackpot.

Let's just say, one of these two answers is pointless,

and you left with £15,250.

-Paul, what would you do with that?

-That would pay for a heck of a lot of holidays for me.

Erm, I love travelling. Erm...

I've been fortunate enough to have been to a lot of places,

but there's still a whole world out there I'd love to go to.

Tina, how about you?

I do love taking my son on holiday and I said to him

if we do win, then I would take him to Hawaii.

Very good. Well, very, very best of luck to the pair of you.

Let's hope one of your two remaining answers is pointless.

We are looking for 2012 Six Nations Try Scorers.

Let's hope nobody's said your next answer - Ronan O'Gara.

It has to be right and it has to be pointless to win that jackpot, so let's see.

For £15,250, how many people said Ronan O'Gara?

Ooh! Bad luck!

OK, you only have one more chance to win today's jackpot, £15,250.

Everything is now riding on Shane Williams.

We're looking for 2012 Six Nations Try Scorers.

You said this was your most confident answer. Your best shot at a pointless answer.

-His!

-Has to be right, then it has to be pointless if you're going to win that jackpot.

So for £15,250, this is your last shot at it.

How many people said Shane Williams?

-Oh, no!

-Never mind.

APPLAUSE

Don't worry.

Bad luck. A really, really, tough, tough category.

Unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer.

But you do still get to take home our Pointless trophy, so very, very well done.

APPLAUSE

Yeah, the jackpot lives on. Sorry, guys.

Shane Williams retired in 2011, unfortunately. He finished with a try, of course.

Ronan O'Gara did play in the 2012 Six Nations, didn't score a try.

I suspect, if he had done, he would have been a pointless answer.

And Dan Flutey, you're thinking of Riki Flutey.

Again, he didn't score in the Six Nations in 2012 either.

Let's look at some of those who did.

Any rugby fans would definitely have got a few of these.

You would have won a lot of money. Perhaps you should come and play.

Let's take a look.

Ben Foden and Ben Youngs both English players.

Fergus McFadden scored a try for Ireland.

Leigh Halfpenny was the biggest point scorer in the whole competition.

He scored 66 points. Manu Tuilagi of England, Richie Gray of Scotland.

Sergio Parisse of Italy. Another Englishman, Tom Croft.

Wesley Fofana of France scored in four out of five games.

I suspect a lot of people would have got him.

Also there's Rougerie of France. Greig Laidlaw, Lee Jones, Keith Earls, Vincent Clerc.

All would have won the money. Well done, if you said those at home. Tough luck, guys.

Well, we do have to say goodbye to you, Paul and Tina. It's been wonderful having you on the show.

Thank you both so much for playing. Excellent!

APPLAUSE

Paul and Tina didn't win our jackpot, which means it rolls over on to the next show,

when we will be playing for a record-breaking...

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Join us then, to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.