Episode 17 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong.

Welcome to Pointless, where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

Let's meet today's players.

-Couple number one...

-Hi, I'm Dan, this is my fiancee Amy, and we live in Birmingham.

And couple number two...

I'm Gail. This is Bill.

He's the husband of a very dear friend of mine.

Couple number three...

Hi, I'm Ashley. This is Sam. We're friends from the University of Chichester.

And couple number four...

I'm Elliot, from Plumstead,

this is Tanya, from Bromley,

and we're mates.

-These are today's contestants.

-APPLAUSE

Thanks very much, everyone. We'll find out more about you as the show goes along.

There's one person left to introduce.

If he were a boxer, he'd be known as Richard

"as always, by country, I mean a sovereign state in its own right" Osman!

-He is my Pointless friend. He's Richard.

-Hiya! Hello!

-Have you recovered from the last show yet?

-Oh!

-How about that?

I'm still a bit hung-over, to be honest,

-from all of Ivor's whiskey!

-Yes.

We gave away the biggest jackpot in Pointless history.

-It was terrific. They won it on Philip Pullman novels.

-Yes.

-Absolutely lovely, so -

-And the party afterwards was fantastic!

-It was sensational!

-Oh!

That Ivor knows some stories, doesn't he? Whoo!

What happens at Ivor's party stays at Ivor's party. Am I right?

We've got three returning pairs here. We've got one new pair - Elliot and Tanya.

We start again with the jackpot and we'll build it up, I'm sure.

But an amazing show last time. If you didn't see it, have a look on iPlayer.

Ivor and Lindsay were very well-deserving winners, weren't they?

They really were. Fantastic. Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

All questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants need to find the obscure answers they didn't get.

Everyone's trying to find a pointless answer that none of them gave.

Each time that happens, we will add £250 to the jackpot.

As you may have gathered Ivor and Lindsay won the jackpot,

so today's starts off at £1,000.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

I'll take an answer off each of you, but there is to be no conferring.

Whoever has the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated. Make sure that's not you.

Our first category today is...

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's first, please step up to the podium.

OK, the question concerns...

-..Famous Nordic People.

-GIGGLING

Famous Nordic People. Richard.

We'll show you clues to the identities of seven Nordic people -

that's anyone born in Sweden, Denmark, Norway or Finland.

Give us an obscure answer, you'll score fewer points. A wrong answer will score you 100.

There's 14 to have a go at at home. Good luck.

OK. Thank you very much indeed. Let's put these clues on the board.

Here is our first board of seven. We've got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are. Seven clues to seven famous Nordic types.

-Amy?

-Yes.

Welcome back to Pointless. What do you hope is going to come up?

-Not that!

-Not Nordic people?

-No!

-Oh, I'm so sorry! I thought that's what you wanted.

Anything book-related would've been a big thumbs-up from me.

-Remind us what you do, Amy.

-I work in a little book shop in Solihull.

-Come on, books! Yay!

-Come on, books!

-Yes!

Now then, famous Nordic people.

I only know one of those.

Erm... I'm going to have to go with the only one I know,

which is Ulrika Jonsson for Shooting Stars captain.

Ulrika Jonsson, says Amy. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Ulrika Jonsson.

-Absolutely right.

-Thank God for that!

-36.

-APPLAUSE

-36 for Ulrika Jonsson.

-Ulrika Jonsson.

Born in Sweden in 1967.

Now then, Bill, welcome back. Another returning pair.

Everyone gets two chances to reach the Pointless final.

You're retired. Remind us what you used to do.

-I used to be in the travel business.

-Right.

Did you ever travel round Nordic countries?

No, I haven't, actually.

So, er, I'm not sure about several of these.

I know the answer to about three.

I think, possibly, I'm going to go for Edvard Munch,

with the painting of The Scream.

-Edvard Munch, says Bill.

-Yes.

OK, Munch. Let's see if that's right

and how many of our 100 people said Munch.

He's right.

-24.

-APPLAUSE

A new low score for Edvard Munch,

or "Munk", some people say.

Good answer. There's four versions of The Scream.

One of them sold for 119 million in 2012.

-Wow.

-That's a lot of money.

Wow?! Is that all I could come up with? Wow?

-I should've gone...!

-LAUGHTER

Very good.

Now then, Sam, remind us what you do.

I am a student at the University of Chichester.

-Studying?

-Sport psychology.

Sport psychology. OK.

What sport psychology are you going to use in this round?

Not a lot. It's not the best round for me.

I knew the top answer. It's going to be a guess, I think.

Erm, I'm going to go for the Liverpool midfielder

and say Michael Laudrup.

Michael Laudrup. Oh! Ashley doesn't think so!

But we'll see! Michael Laudrup, says Sam.

Let's see if that's right and how many people knew that answer.

Ooh! Bad luck, Sam.

Unfortunately, an incorrect answer, which means you score 100 points.

-I'm sorry. Richard.

-Sorry, Sam. He is Nordic,

but he doesn't fit any of the facts I've put on the board.

I'll give you the answer at the end.

-OK. Elliot?

-Hello.

Welcome to the show. Great to have you here.

-What do you do, Elliot?

-I'm a computer programmer.

What kind of programs do you make?

It's financial software that gets sold to banks. It's not very interesting.

-Unless you're a banker! Then, it's fascinating!

-Exactly!

What do you like to get up to when you're not doing that?

I like collecting music. I own 6,000 CDs.

-Wow! Are you a DJ or anything?

-I'm not a DJ.

-Just an anorak, is the word for it.

-Just an avid collector.

Any particular style of music you like?

-Mostly dance music.

-Right.

-House, trance, drum and bass.

All that loud rubbish!

You love drum and bass, don't you?

I love anything that's -

Dubstep or drum and bass, what's your favourite?

Oh! You've put me on the spot there!

-Erm... Probably drum and bass, actually.

-Yes.

-You're quite old school, aren't you?

-Yes. Old school.

Anything that sounds like stuff falling out of a cupboard,

-I am right there! Yes.

-LAUGHTER

-OK. Now then, Elliot, that board is yours.

-OK.

-How good are you on Nordics?

-I know one answer,

and I know the surname of another one.

Er, I think the peace prize is... I'm sure it's Nobel.

However, I'm going to go for the lead singer of A-ha.

-It's Morten Harket.

-Morten Harket.

Morten Harket. OK. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people remember Morten Harket.

It's right. 24 is our best score so far.

Morten Harket. Going down. Ooh!

-25.

-APPLAUSE

Not bad at all, Elliot.

-Good answer.

-Yes. Morten Harket, born in 1959 in Norway.

-It's a name a generation of people won't forget!

-Yes.

Let's take a look at the rest. The author of Hedda Gabler?

-Ibsen.

-Henrik Ibsen, absolutely. 10 points.

It is Nobel who invented dynamite. Alfred Nobel.

Would've scored 53. You did very well to avoid it.

-Leader of the first expedition?

-Amundsen.

-Absolutely. 29 points.

It's not Michael Laudrup, 1984 to 1996, for Liverpool.

It's Jan Molby.

It's the best answer up there. 4 points. Well done if you said that.

Jan Molby was one of the first footballers

to have that half-Scandinavian half-Scouse accent.

-Brilliant.

-It was just perfect.

Thank you very much indeed. Let's take a look at the scores.

24 - the best score of that pass.

Well done. Bill and Gail looking pretty strong.

Up to 25, Elliot and Tanya. Up to 36, Amy and Dan.

And bad luck, Sam and Ashley. 100.

You are way out in front.

However, anything can happen in the next pass. Who knows?

As long as you answer well, Ashley, you may still be with us at the end.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK. Let's put seven more clues on the board to famous Nordic people.

We have got...

I'll read those all one final time.

There we are. We are looking for the names of these famous Nordic people.

-Now then, Tanya.

-Hello.

-Welcome. What do you do, Tanya?

-I'm currently on maternity leave.

-Congratulations. How old is your baby?

I've got a five-month-old called Jake

and a two-year-old called Joshua. He's a big fan of the show.

Excellent. Hi, Joshua. And hi, Jake, of course.

LAUGHTER

-Babies love the sound of the column.

-They do. Joshua cheers.

-Unless it's a wrong answer. They don't like that.

-No!

-What did you do before, Tanya?

-I was an adoption social worker.

-That must be very fulfilling, mustn't it?

-It's a nice job. It's the nice end of social work.

OK. Very good. Now, the high scorers are Ashley and Sam on 100.

You're on 25. If you can score 74 or less,

you'll be through to the next round.

But just so Jake's got something to listen to for longer, try and get a nice low score!

That would be the idea.

OK, this should be good for me because I'm half-Danish.

Oh, it's a shoo-in!

The last board was amazing.

I know a few on this one. It's hard to know which will be lowest.

I think I'll go Directed The Film "The Seventh Seal",

Ingmar Bergman.

Ingmar Bergman, says Tanya. Ingmar Bergman.

Here is your red line. Below that, you are in Round Two.

Let's see if Ingmar Bergman is right and if it is, how many people said it.

Absolutely right. And you are through.

-10.

-APPLAUSE

10. Very well done. Takes your total up to 35.

Swedish filmmaker and producer. Won three Oscars, all for Best Foreign Film.

Now then, Ashley...

-Ashley, welcome back.

-Thanks!

Tell us also what you do.

I do the same as Sam at the University of Chichester, doing sport and exercise psychology.

-Very good. Now, you have a very high score there.

-Yes.

Do any of your areas of expertise cover these sorts of characters?

Well, I worked at Wimbledon this summer and last summer,

so I think I'll just have to go for Bjorn Borg.

OK. Bjorn Borg, says Ashley. You are the high scorers.

You'll just have to hope Bjorn Borg takes you a long way down.

Bjorn Borg. How many people said it?

-45.

-APPLAUSE

45, Ashley. Takes your total up to an unbeatable 145. Richard...

Big score. Former world number one. Won 11 Grand Slam titles.

Bjorn Borg. Born in Sweden in 1956.

Thanks very much. Now then, Gail...

Great news - you are through to the next round.

Even if you score 100 points, you won't overtake Ashley and Sam on 145.

-Gail, you used to be a fashion model.

-That's right.

-An international fashion model.

-Absolutely.

What was the most glamorous job you did as a model?

Probably my first trip to Paris, which was amazing, just after I'd had my daughter.

We were photographed in the middle of the Champs-Elysee, traffic going backwards and forwards.

We actually did the show at the Olympia in Paris,

which is even bigger than the London Palladium, so that was quite something.

-And Zizi Jeanmaire was on the same stage as us!

-Very good.

-Now then, Gail, the board of Nordic people behind me...

-Yes.

Well, I think the last board I preferred.

Erm, this one, I'm going to have a bit of a punt, as they say,

and say Gustav Holst for the composer of the Finlandia.

Gustav Holst, says Gail. Let's see if that right and -

Bill doesn't look very happy.

There's no red line for you because you're already through, so we needn't worry.

Holst.

Bad luck, Gail. An incorrect answer. Scores you 100 points.

You're through to Round Two, so it couldn't matter less.

It was worth taking a punt on something, wasn't it?

Gustav Holst not Nordic, I'm afraid.

Now then, Dan,

are your preparations for your wedding

any further along the line since last time?

I think I've decided what underwear I'm wearing, but that's about it.

OK. Good. This is good!

At this rate, you should have pretty much a full costume by the time the day dawns.

Very good. Anyway, Dan, listen, enough of this flim-flam.

Time to get on with the important matter of famous Nordic people.

The board behind me is full of blanks that you can fill in.

You're through to the next round, anyway.

Even if you score 100, you won't overtake Ashley and Sam.

-That's really good news.

-It is good news.

Talk us through the board, see if there's anything you know.

Widely-used temperature scale - possibly Fahrenheit. Maybe. I'm not quite sure.

Erm, I'm going to have a punt at the fairy story, The Emperor's New Clothes

and say Hans Christian Andersen.

Hans Christian Andersen, says Dan. Let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

No red line for you.

It's right.

-41.

-APPLAUSE

Very well done. Takes your total up to 77.

Born 1805 in Denmark, Hans Christian Andersen.

Let's take a look at the rest of them.

The widely-used temperature scale... Not Fahrenheit. The other one.

-Celsius.

-Absolutely. Anders Celsius, a Swede, would've scored 10.

The composer of the tone poem Finlandia? Not Holst...

-Sibelius.

-Jean Sibelius. Sorry.

-No, no, no, no!

-That's about all I can answer.

-Would've scored 9.

-Surely you know who won the F1 Drivers Championship?

-Mika Hakkinen.

It is. Very well done. The Finn. Would've scored 6.

-And the fascist leader?

-I think I know this. Is it Quisling?

Absolutely right. Another name for a traitor.

17 points. Vidkun is his first name, but we would've taken Quisling.

-Oh! Vidkun!

-Lovely name for a boy.

-Isn't it?

-Lovely name for a traitor.

-LAUGHTER

Thank you very much indeed.

The pair who'll be leaving us, with their high score of 145, Ashley and Sam.

Head-to-headers last time. Round One-ers this time.

-It's been great having you on. Thanks so much for playing.

-BOTH: Thanks.

But for the three remaining pairs, it's time for Round Two.

Sadly, at the end of this round, another pair will be leaving us.

I wonder which pair it's going to be.

Elliot and Tanya, you did very well.

-Half-Danish, Tanya?

-That's right.

-Well done.

-Thank you.

Very well done. Good answering.

Gail and Bill, you came through, despite Holst! That was a good stab in the dark.

Very best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two is...

Classic Novels.

Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first?

Whoever's going first, please set up to the podium.

The question concerns...

Novels of 19th Century Authors. Richard.

Xander's going to show you the names of five classic novelists.

All you have to do is tell us any novel by any of these novelists.

A perfect round for anyone doing GCSE English.

Or anyone who works in a book shop. LAUGHTER

Very good indeed!

We are going to put the names of five authors on the board.

They'll remain there for the whole round.

You just have to name any novel by any one of those five novelists.

OK. Here are the names of the authors...

I'll read those one last time.

Now then, Dan...

Dan, how are we feeling about this?

Erm, it's not my strongest subject,

however, I think I know... possibly a Jane Austen novel

and I'm going to say

Sense and Sensibility.

Sense and Sensibility, says Dan. Let's see if that's right.

How many of our 100 people said it?

He's right.

-16.

-APPLAUSE

Not bad, Dan. 16.

Jane Austen's first published novel, in 1811.

Now then, Bill, how do we feel about this subject?

Er, with one particular writer, pretty good.

-What are you going to go for?

-George Eliot, Middlemarch.

Middlemarch, says Bill. Let's see if that's right

and how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

-10.

-APPLAUSE

10 for Middlemarch, Bill.

-Very well done.

-You're a George Eliot fan, are you?

-I'm reading it on Kindle at the moment!

-That's handy!

Other book-reading devices are available!

-LAUGHTER

-Thank you very much indeed.

Now then, Elliot,

how are we feeling?

Like I've turned up to an exam I've not revised for!

I'm really sorry, Tanya, I've got something really obvious.

-Pride and Prejudice.

-OK.

Pride and Prejudice. Well, Sense and Sensibility scored 16.

Let's see. Pride and Prejudice. How many people said it?

-APPLAUSE

-Well, there's your answer.

-A lot worse.

-Quite a lot worse! 42 for Pride and Prejudice! Wow!

Talk about prejudice!

It's quite low, isn't it? Probably her most famous novel.

Well, it is her most famous novel, from 1813.

There we are. Let's take a look at the scores.

Bill, once again, lovely low score from Bill and Gail.

You're looking pretty strong on 10.

Then up to 16.

Then up to 42, where Elliot and Tanya are.

Tanya, we need a really good low score from you

to make sure you're with us at the end.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK. So we still have our five authors up there.

No-one yet has gone for Elizabeth Gaskell.

Tanya, are you tempted?

Yes. I could do.

I have got a degree in English.

-You've done well with the categories for me today.

-Buh-rilliant!

You are the high scorers. We need a really good low score.

OK.

In that case, I'll go a bit risky.

I'll go Wilkie Collins,

Armadale.

Armadale.

No red line for you. You are the high scorers on 42.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Armadale.

It's right.

Down it goes. A great answer.

Yes! Very well done indeed! That's a pointless answer!

It adds £250 today's jackpot, taking the total up to £1,250.

It scores you nothing and it leaves your total at 42.

Let's hope that's enough to keep you in the game.

-Richard.

-Terrific answer. Well done. From 1866.

That jackpot is nudging its way back up to 20,000, isn't it?

-Incrementally, yes.

-LAUGHTER

Now then, Gail...

-Gail, how are you feeling about this?

-Not very good.

Erm...

The two I knew, obvious ones, have gone,

but... I shall say Emma.

Emma, says Gail. The high scorers are Tanya and Elliot. You're on 10.

If you can score 31 or less, you're through to the next round. There is your red line.

Let's see if Emma can get you below that red line. Emma.

You've done it. Absolutely spot on!

-31 you needed. 31 you got.

-APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed, Gail.

-41, your total. Richard.

-That was close, wasn't it?

-Yes.

Emma. The last novel to be published in Jane Austen's lifetime.

OK. Now, Amy,

you wanted books, we got books for you.

It's a little bit before my time!

Do you only read books after you were born?

I mean, we all only read books after we're born, of course!

-But do you only read books written after you were born?

-Yes.

All the ones I knew have been said already, so it's a bit "Grr!"

Erm...

Robinson Crusoe.

I don't know!

Robinson Crusoe, says Amy. Robinson Crusoe.

Well, you're on 16. The high scorers are Tanya and Elliot.

If you can score 25 or less, you're in the head-to-head.

Robinson Crusoe, though...

Let's find out, is it right?

Bad luck, Amy. We did books for you specially!

But it wasn't my vampire books. I would've been all over that!

-You didn't say vampire books! You said books!

-You said books.

I didn't want to give away my strengths.

I spent all last night doing a book question for you.

Unfortunately, an incorrect answer. It scores you 100 points. Takes your total up to 116.

Robinson Crusoe is Daniel Defoe, I'm afraid.

Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers here.

Basil, which is Wilkie Collins, would've been a pointless answer.

George Eliot's Daniel Deronda.

Hide and Seek, that's also Wilkie Collins.

Mary Barton by Elizabeth Gaskell is a pointless answer. Ruth, also.

Romola, which is George Eliot, that's pointless.

The Dead Secret and The Law and the Lady, Wilkie Collins,

and Elizabeth Gaskell's Wives and Daughters, as well.

There's a bunch of Wilkie Collins novels which were pointless.

Anything other than The Moonstone and The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins

was a pointless answer.

Thank you, Richard. At the end of Round Two,

our losing pair, with their high score of 116, are Amy and Dan.

Dear, oh, dear!

That was a shame!

-A real shame!

-Never mind.

You had some of the other ones, presumably, that others had taken?

Yes. I was going to say Emma.

This cheeky lady on the front row said it first!

Dear, oh, dear! Anyway, listen, great to have you on the show.

I'm sorry we have to say goodbye to you so soon. Thanks for playing.

APPLAUSE

But for the two remaining pairs, things are about to get exciting

as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Elliot and Tanya, Gail and Bill.

You are one round from the final and a chance to play for our jackpot,

-which currently stands at £1,250.

-CHEERING

Only one pair can play for that money

and to decide which pair it is, you will go head-to-head.

You are allowed to confer. The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

So, Gail and Bill...

I mean, Elliot and Tanya - we've given them everything they wanted.

They've had Nordic People and 19th-Century Novelists.

These are the things you wanted. These are the things we got.

-What would you like in this round?

-Countries or Language.

OK. Gail?

-Words. I like anagrams, those sorts of things.

-Oh, yes! They come up!

-And sometimes Food and Drink is good.

-Very good indeed.

You can put your heads together from now on. Anything can happen.

Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here comes your first question.

It concerns...

-LAUGHTER

-That's what you wanted, wasn't it?

-Yes, it's what Gail and Bill wanted.

-Somebody asked for it.

-Fictional Nuns.

-It might've been you who asked for it.

We'll show you five pictures of nuns from TV and film.

Tell us the name of the actor playing any of these nuns, please. Best of luck.

OK, let's reveal our five fictional nuns.

Here they are. We have got...

LAUGHTER

There we are.

Five fictional nuns. Elliot and Tanya have played best

so they get to go first.

-(Is that Raquel Welch?)

-Yes, I think it is.

THEY WHISPER

OK. We don't have a consensus on which answer to go for. Erm...

We're going to say B, Audrey Hepburn.

B, Audrey Hepburn.

B, Audrey Hepburn, say Elliot and Tanya.

Gail and Bill, talk us through the others.

Erm, well, we know E is Frankie Howerd,

-C...

-C is Whoopi Goldberg.

We'll say C, Whoopi Goldberg.

C, Whoopi Goldberg, say Gail and Bill.

We have Audrey Hepburn versus Whoopi Goldberg.

Elliot and Tanya say Audrey Hepburn. Let's see if B is Audrey Hepburn and how many people said it.

It's right.

25.

25 for Audrey Hepburn.

Whoopi Goldberg. Let's see if that's right

and how many of our 100 people said C was Whoopi Goldberg.

It's right. Is it going to beat Audrey Hepburn?

-No, it's not.

-APPLAUSE

Very well done, Elliot and Tanya. You are up 1-0. Richard.

Audrey Hepburn in The Nun's Story and Whoopi Goldberg in Sister Act.

You're right about E, as well, Gail,

but it would've scored you 51.

That's from Up the Chastity Belt, of course.

Gail, I heard you whisper something about D. Who did you think it might be?

-I thought it was...

-Raquel Welch.

-Yes.

You're absolutely right, it is.

It would've scored 14 points. GAIL GROANS

It would've won you the question.

-And A... do you know A?

-I don't know A.

It's Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan as a nun in Machete.

Would've scored you 6 points.

She makes a cracking nun, doesn't she?

-Doesn't Raquel Welch, as well?

-Yes!

-And Frankie, to be fair!

-Yes.

Very good. Brilliant. OK, thanks very much indeed.

Here comes your second question. Gail and Bill need to win this to stay in the game.

It concerns...

-Richard.

-We'll show you the names of five volcanoes from around the world

but we've missed alternate letters. Can you fill in the gaps?

Thanks very much.

Let's reveal our five volcanoes with alternate letters missing.

We have got...

I'll read those all again without the blanks.

There we are. Five volcanoes.

Bill and Gail, you go first this time.

-Krakatoa?

-Do you know the others?

-Vesuvius.

-That'll be high, won't it?

What about second from bottom?

We're going to go for the bottom one, Krakatoa.

Krakatoa, say Gail and Bill.

Elliot and Tanya,

see how many of those you can fill in.

I've only got one other one. I think you've got a few more, haven't you?

-What have you got?

-I've got Vesuvius.

The top one's Stromboli.

I would guess, I don't know it, but the fourth one, I'm seeing Tombola.

But that's just a guess, just because I can see that word.

I don't know the third. What do you think?

-I've never heard of Stromboli.

-Haven't you?

-No.

-Maybe we should go for that one.

-OK. I'm pretty sure of it.

OK. Stromboli.

We have Stromboli versus Krakatoa.

Gail and Bill went Krakatoa. Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

It is right. Krakatoa.

Down it goes. 42.

APPLAUSE

42. Elliot and Tanya, you have gone for Stromboli.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

If you win this, you go straight through to the final.

Absolutely right.

Well done. You've done it.

14.

Very, very well done indeed. Elliot and Tanya,

after two questions, you are through to the final, 2-0.

Well played, Tanya. Terrific answer.

The second one down is Vesuvius.

It would've scored 80, so well avoided.

Now, T-M-O-A, Tombola would fit, but it's not Tombola.

It's Tambora, which is an Indonesian volcano.

It had an even more extraordinarily huge eruption than Krakatoa back in the 19th century,

the biggest eruption in recorded history.

The other one is a pointless answer.

You may not have heard of it, but some people at home might've filled in the gaps.

It's in Chile and it's the Hudson. It's a pointless answer.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Our losing pair, I'm afraid it's Gail and Bill.

You've done such a good job, though. You've sailed through majestically.

And then, in the head-to-head, I'm afraid you've just come up against Elliot and Tanya,

who were quite a formidable foe there.

Two perfectly good answers - Whoopi Goldberg and Krakatoa.

Just Stromboli... That was good volcano-spotting!

Isn't Stromboli a pasta or something? A soup or something?

It's a volcano.

-LAUGHTER

-That's exactly what it is.

Gail and Bill, I'm afraid this is where we have to say goodbye.

It's been lovely having you on. Thank you so much for playing. Great contestants.

APPLAUSE

But for Elliot and Tanya, it's time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Elliot and Tanya.

You have fought off the competition and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

The jackpot stands at...

CHEERING

Whose idea was it to come on Pointless?

-We were both chomping at the bit, weren't we?

-Yes.

-Very good.

I'm guessing, Elliot, Tanya was the obvious choice of person to come on with.

Maybe that's unfair. But I would say Tanya's done a lot of the heavy lifting.

-She has done. She's been very good, actually.

-Thank you.

-You got the only pointless of the game, as well.

-Absolutely.

Think how much Jake would've enjoyed that going all the way down!

-They'll go wild for that.

-Very good.

-Very best of luck. Anything you'd particularly like to see?

-Music would be good.

The periodic table.

Countries and capitals. That sort of stuff.

-OK.

-Fingers crossed.

-Fingers crossed.

Let's see. It always needs a bit of specialist knowledge, this one.

The rules are very simple.

All you have to do is find a pointless answer. You've already found one today.

Do that and you'll go home with that jackpot of £1,250.

You've got to choose a category. Here are your five options.

-ELLIOT CHUCKLES

-There's no Music.

There's no Music. Let's count stuff out.

-Tennis Stars, that is 100 percent no for me.

-No.

BOTH: US Politics, no.

Honours, no.

Mexico? What could that be?

-States in Mexico or something.

-That'd be no for me, as well.

Which means it's all on you and Modern Playwrights.

All right. I may know nothing. It depends who it is.

-Are you all right with that?

-We've had a good time! You've got a trophy!

-OK.

Modern Playwrights it is. Let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Tom Stoppard Plays as they could.

-Richard.

-We're looking for the title of any Tom Stoppard stage play, please.

We'll include adaptations but not translations.

Any Tom Stoppard stage play written up to the end of October 2012.

Where some of those works are in trilogies,

we'll accept either the title or the individual works within it. Very best of luck.

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that jackpot of £1,250

-is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Ready?

-Yes.

Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

-On The Razzle.

-On The Razzle.

-I've seen that. Erm...

-Arcadia is obvious.

-OK.

-Erm...

I think there's one called something like Artist Descending A Staircase.

-OK.

-Let me just try and remember another one.

Erm...

We'll have to go for Arcadia. I can't...

I'm trying to think of one. It's one word and it's not coming.

I'm not sure if it's Artist Descending A Staircase or...

..Artist Descends A Staircase.

-I could try both.

-I'd try Descending, because there's a song called something like that.

-10 seconds.

-It could be based on that.

OK. Time is up. We are looking for Tom Stoppard Plays.

I now need your three answers.

-On The Razzle.

-On The Razzle.

-Artist Descends A Staircase.

-Artist...

-Or Descending.

-Shall we go for Descending?

-"Artist Descending" you want?

-Yes.

I don't think Arcadia is going to be pointless,

so we could try Descends and Descending.

-Should we do that?

-Yes.

-OK.

-On The Razzle's much more likely.

-OK.

-Artist Descends A Staircase.

I just hope those are by Tom Stoppard!

-OK.

-On The Razzle is.

-I think it's a good plan.

Of those three, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-On The Razzle, because I know that's right.

-On The Razzle, we shall put last.

Which is your least likely shot?

Artist Descending A Staircase.

Artist Descending A Staircase we'll put first.

Let's pop those up on the board. Here they are. We have got...

OK. We were looking for Tom Stoppard Plays.

Your first answer, Artist Descending A Staircase,

which you thought was your least likely shot at a pointless answer.

If this were to win the jackpot for you,

what would you do with £1,250, Tanya?

-I need to buy a house and a car.

-LAUGHTER

-Good luck with that.

-LAUGHTER

-Elliot -

-You should've been on the last show.

-I know!

Elliot.

It'll be 625. I could go on holiday with that. Little holiday somewhere. Why not?

-Why not?

-It'd be good.

-OK. Well, let's see.

Artist Descending A Staircase, your first answer.

For £1,250, it has to be right, it has to be pointless.

Let's see if anyone said it.

It is right.

Artist Descending A Staircase, your first answer.

Down it goes, through the 20s, into the teens, into single figures.

Still going down! You've done it! Look at that!

-CHEERING

-Very, very well played indeed!

Wow! Artist Descending A Staircase. Very good indeed. Brilliant.

-Thank you very much!

-Very well done. Good stuff.

-Wow! Congratulations. You covered your bases.

-We did.

Brilliant. Artist Descending A Staircase.

A fantastic answer, a pointless answer,

which means you leave with a jackpot of £1,250.

-APPLAUSE

-Very good indeed.

No offence to Elliot, but how good is Tanya?

-She's very good!

-Amazing!

It quite often happens that the jackpot doesn't go for a long time and then goes a lot in a few shows.

But that's absolutely terrific. Very well played.

And tactically brilliant, as well. You did exactly the right thing.

If you had got that word wrong, we wouldn't have taken it.

-Let's take a look -

-Can I see if I've got a couple?

-You're very good at these.

-Hapgood. Was that what you were thinking of?

-Hapgood would've scored you 1 point.

-Oh!

Every Good Boy Deserves Favour.

Pointless answer. APPLAUSE

Get in!

You know you don't get the money, don't you?

What?

Unless Tanya and Elliot think it's appropriate to share it?

-No.

-To be honest, you've done as much as Elliot

to earn it! LAUGHTER

Aww!

-Elliot's been the moral support!

-Don't "Ahh"! He just won!

Let's take a look at some of the other pointless answers.

HE READS TITLES

Rock'N'Roll. One of those recent ones.

There's a few more. Dalliance would've been a pointless answer. Indian Ink.

Voyage also pointless. Very well done if you said any of those.

Very well played, Elliot and Tanya. Brilliant throughout.

Thanks very much indeed. Thanks to our winning players, Elliot and Tanya,

who go away with today's jackpot of £1,250.

-Very well done.

-APPLAUSE

Join us next time when we put more obscure knowledge to the test.

-It's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd