Episode 3 Pointless

Thank you very much. I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the quiz show where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

Now, let's meet today's players.

-And our first couple?

-Hi, I'm Hilary. This is my son, Sean.

We're both from Chippenham in Wiltshire,

although Sean currently lives in Preston.

I'm a retired nurse who used to work with transgender patients.

-On to our next pair.

-Hi, I'm Lewis. This is Tanya.

-We're a couple from Bradford.

-On to our next pair.

Hi, I'm Judy, this is my friend Mary.

We're both from Plymouth in Devon.

I volunteer in a donkey sanctuary near Plymouth.

And our final pair.

Hi, I'm Mick, this is my son Mike. We're from Southend-on-Sea.

Fabulous. These are our contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thank you. We'll be finding out more about you as the show goes on.

There's only one person left for me to introduce.

He's like a question mark in a suit.

Must be a nightmare for him to buy suits.

-It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hi.

-Afternoon.

-Afternoon to you.

-Are you well?

-Very well.

We've got four new pairs today, haven't we? A rare occasion, doesn't happen very often.

Should be an absolute cracker.

And one of our contestants today is a boxing MC. Can you guess who it is?

One of our contestants is a boxing... I haven't...

-I have an inkling. Let's see.

-I'll give you one clue.

-Yeah?

It's not Hilary.

Ah...

-Should be a cracker, shouldn't it?

-Excellent. Looking forward to it.

Now, all our questions at Pointless have been put to 100 people before the show.

All our contestants need to do is find the obscure answers our 100 people did not get.

Now, what everyone is trying to do is find a pointless answer

that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time, so today's jackpot starts off...

at £5,000. There we are.

APPLAUSE

Right, if everyone is ready, let's play Pointless!

OK. In this round, I'll take an answer from each of you.

There is to be no conferring.

Whichever pair has the highest score will be eliminated, so try and make sure that's not you.

OK, our first category today is...

Can you all deciding your pairs who is going to go first, who is going to go second.

And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

..as they could. Words ending in T-I-A-L. Richard.

Yeah, any word which has its own entry in the Oxford dictionary of English that ends -TIAL.

As always, no proper nouns or hyphenated words.

Very best of luck. Quite a few on this list.

-Let's see how well you do at home.

-Now then, Sean.

-You live up in Preston?

-Yes, I do.

-So what's taking you up there?

-I went there to go to university.

-What did you study up there?

-I studied sports journalism.

-Very good. What is your favourite sport?

Football. It was just football journalism.

-I say sports, I don't really know any other sports!

-OK.

Well, I should let you think a little bit.

-I'm going to say substantial.

-Substantial, says Sean.

Let's see if it is right, and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

It's right.

Not bad at all, Sean. Very well done.

APPLAUSE

-Six for substantial.

-Yeah, could be a low-scoring round, this one.

There are so many words on the list that none of them scoring a huge amount. Yes, substantial.

-You know what substantial means, don't you?

-I have an inkling.

-Tanya, how long have you and Lewis been going out?

-Two years.

-How did you meet?

-Oh, well...

HE LAUGHS

Oh, God. Really?

I tell you what, I'm going to down settle back and enjoy this.

Go on, Tanya.

We had mutual friends and we were out in a bar one night

and Lewis came to talk to me and he was like, how are you?

And he was like, I'm a footballer.

I was like, oh, really? He made out that he played for Birmingham FC.

-Just the youth squad.

-Oh, yes, fine(!) One step at a time, Lewis.

-Under the name of George Phillips.

-Does that work?

-Apparently.

Going up to someone, saying would you like a drink, kind of thing,

and then lying about who you are?

-It must only work on me!

-Evidently, it works. OK.

Well, a word ending in -TIAL is what we are after.

I'm not too sure on the last -TIAL spelling, but, credential?

Credential, says Tanya. Let's see if it's right. Let's see how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

Very, very well done indeed - one!

-Good work. One point for Tanya.

-Well played, Tanya. Very good start.

A qualification showing your suitability for something.

But Lewis' credentials were dubious, would be a way to use that word.

George Phillips, has he ever played for Birmingham?

George Phillips, I'll have a little look.

Wanted by Bradford Police...

OK.

Mary, how have you been preparing for Pointless?

I have been studying on the internet things I'm not very good at,

like film stars and American presidents, Australia presidents...

You were telling me before that you have been studying Liam Neeson?

Yes, I didn't even know what he looked like until I went on the internet.

So I thought, I'll pick out something about him and maybe I'll be lucky and it will come up.

That's good. Round two is what does Liam Neeson looked like? So that is...

-that is handy.

-I still don't know!

-Good round. Do you like words rounds?

-I love words.

-Excellent. Well, have you got a good one ending -TIAL?

-Well, I hope so. Palatial.

-Palatial says Mary, let's see if it's right.

Let's see how many people said it. Palatial.

It's right.

Six!

-Great score, Mary. Six for palatial.

-Well played, Mary.

Another very low score. It's going to be a cracking round, I think. Yes, resembling a palace.

Now, then. Mike.

What would be your perfect category, Mike?

-Anything to do with boxing, I think.

-You have been a boxer?

-I have done.

-No longer, you are saying?

-I stopped about five years ago.

-About five years ago. What do you do now, Mike?

-I work in IT now.

Very good. Have you had long enough to think of a -TIAL-ending word?

I have. If it's spelt right. Circumstantial.

Circumstantial, if you please.

Good word.

OK, let's see if it's right, and let's see how many of our 100 people said circumstantial.

Absolutely right.

Five.

Good score.

-Five for circumstantial.

-Well played, Mike, another good score.

Pointing indirectly to someone's guilt but not necessarily proving it.

Thanks very much. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

One is very much our best score in that pass, Tanya, very well done.

Then we go up to five, where we find Mike and Mick.

Then six, where Judy and Mary and Hilary and Sean are.

Yes, it's all very very close. The very best of luck to you.

We're coming back down the line now. Can the second players take their places at the podium.

OK. So we are looking for words ending in -TIAL. Now then, Mick.

What do you do?

I'm a health and safety manager for a large scaffolding company.

What do you do in your spare time? Maybe I'm prying?

-Maybe he can't tell me that?

-Maybe he can't tell you what he does in his spare time?

Well, yes, because if maybe it would ruin... I've got to guess who is the boxing MC.

It would only ruin it in the unlikely event that Mick is the boxing MC.

Which I don't think he is.

Who is it between, in your head?

Judy and Mick, if I'm honest.

You're going to have to go for one or the other.

OK. Mick, what do you do in your spare time?

-I'm a boxing MC.

-Yes!

APPLAUSE

Oh, fantastic!

Do you have a boxing MC voice?

-Yeah, I can put one on.

-What is your voice?

-Go on, announce a bout between me and Richard.

-If you announce a bout between us,

-we will then fight for 15 three-minute rounds.

-I can't.

-Put me on the spot.

-Oh, I'm sorry.

-I tell you what, if you don't win this show, and you're in the next show, maybe you can do it then.

-OK.

They can't win this show. Mick, have you got a good word ending -TIAL?

-I have, yes. Partial.

-OK, partial. You're on five.

The high scorers on six, Judy and Mary, and Hilary and Sean.

That means you want to be scoring a pointless answer to be sure

of staying in the game.

Let's see if it's right, and let's see how many of our 100 people said partial.

It's right!

Wow! 27 for partial. Who would have thought? Takes your total up to 32.

-Richard?

-Yes, a big score isn't it? 27. Existing only in part.

-You should never send your Christmas present by PARTIAL FORCE.

-Judy.

-Hi, there.

-Now, what do you do at the donkey sanctuary?

Basically, riding for the disabled and we also take the donkeys

-out to residential homes to meet the residents as well.

-Lovely.

-How many donkeys have you got?

-Got about 16 at the moment.

-Love donkeys.

-If you come back on the show, will you bring a donkey with you?

-Oh, they've got to come back! Bring a donkey.

-I've got Mary!

AUDIENCE WINCES

Now then, Judy. The highest scorers are now Mick and Mike on 32.

You're on six, which means if you can score 25 or less,

-you are through to the next round.

-I'll be lucky!

Remember, we are looking for words ending in -TIAL.

-Um... I'll go for initial.

-Initial, says Judy. Here is your red line.

Get below that, through to the next round.

Let's see if it's right, let's see how many people said initial.

Absolutely right.

37!

Wow! 37 takes your total up to 43.

-Yes, and Mick and Mike clamber back off the ropes there.

-Yeah.

-Initial, existing in the beginning. Initial.

-Now, then.

-Lewis, explain yourself.

-I wouldn't say I am a sleaze.

I know it seems like I'm coming across as one now,

but at the time it was just a bit of fun.

Me and my friends, just having a laugh. That's not quite as bad.

-And I did only say youth squad. I wasn't raking in the money.

-That was fair enough, yeah!

Can you back it up, are you quite a tidy footballer?

I'm all right at five-a-side, I wouldn't put myself up

-with the Birmingham squad.

-Very good.

Well, you're on one, thanks to Tanya's brilliant answer.

The highest scorers are Judy and Mary on 43.

If you can score 41 or less, you're through to the next round.

Have you got a good word?

Um, I think I have a better one in my head,

but I'm not going to risk it now.

-I'm going to play a bit tactical with impartial.

-Impartial.

We've had partial, you're going to go impartial.

OK, here's your red line. Not too low.

Let's see if you can get below that red line with impartial.

If you do, you're through to the next round. How many people said impartial?

It's right!

You've done it!

Down it goes, to eight. Very well done.

Takes your total up to nine.

Good work, Lewis, best score in this pass as well for your team.

-Impartial, meaning treating all disputants equally.

-Now then, Hilary.

You were saying earlier that you are retired now

but you were a transgender nurse?

-Amongst other things, on a private patients' ward, yes.

-Wow, yeah.

And you nursed on some of the earliest transgender operations?

It was the leading hospital at the time, around the world.

What do you like to do now, Hilary?

I do a lot of puzzling, reading,

-I like to try and compile simple crossword puzzles.

-There we are.

-Now, you have had a nice bit of time to think about words ending in -TIAL.

-I have.

I have one in my head, I hope I haven't made it up.

Expedential.

Expedential, says Hilary. Our high scorers on 43 are Judy and Mary.

You're on six. Which means that you want to score 36 or less.

Here's your red line.

Get below that, you're through to the next round.

Let's see if expedential is right, and let's see how many people said it.

Oh, bad luck, Hilary!

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer, which means you score the maximum of 100 points.

I'm very sorry. That takes your total up to 106. Richard.

-Yeah, Hilary, it does sound like a word.

-It's not a word, even?

-It's not a word, no.

-I don't know where I got it from!

That's why we're not accepting it.

It sounds like exponential to me.

Which would have scored you two points.

-Expedential, I'm afraid not.

-Expedient...

-That's what I thought.

-I thought...yeah.

-There's lots of pointless answers.

-I know you always have a little think on this.

-Interstitial.

-Interstitial would have scored you one point.

-Oh, no!

-That's all right, that's good!

-It's all right...

-Yeah.

I wanted to add pretend bunny to that.

Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers.

Sean and Hilary's time here has been experiential. If nothing else.

Inconsequential and inessential.

Both of those would have been pointless answers.

All of those would have been pointless.

That's a bad start to a CV, by the way. If that's how your CV is starting.

All sorts of pointless answers down there.

But those were the most common amongst them.

Very well done if you got any of those pointless ones at home.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

So, at the end of our first round, the pair who will be leaving us with their high score of 106,

so sorry, Hilary and Sean, it's you!

-Oh, it's OK. We'll be back.

-Oh, yes, you'll be back.

And you know what, Sean, you were the first out of the traps. Six, in fact.

Sean, can you remind me what your special subject is, as well?

-Football.

-Football. OK.

-You might want to close your eyes before Round Two starts.

-Oh, no!

Anyway, we will see you again next time.

We look forward to that very much. Meanwhile, thank you very much for playing. Hilary and Sean!

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for Round Two.

Now, sadly at the end of this round, another pair will be leaving us.

I wonder which pair that is going to be? Lewis and Tanya,

you did very, very well. Lovely low score there of nine in total.

Mike and Mick, did you think you were going to be leaving?

-Until initial come out, yeah.

-And Mary and Judy, still here as well.

-Phew.

-Just.

-Just.

Well, very, very best of luck to all of you in Round Two.

Our category is...

International football.

Can you decide in your pairs whose going to go first and who is going to go second?

Whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

And our question concerns...

Fifa World Cup Golden Shoe winners and their national teams.

Fifa World Cup Golden Shoe winners and their national teams. Richard.

On each pass we're going to show you the name of six footballers, all

of whom have won the Golden Shoe, or the Golden Boot as it is often known,

at a World Cup tournament.

The player who scored the most goals at that tournament.

All you need to do is tell us which teams of these men represented when they won that, please.

-It's going to be 12 in all to have a go at at home. Good luck.

-OK.

So we are looking for national football teams

of these players who won the Golden Shoe.

And we have got on our first board...

I'll read those all one last time.

-There we are. Six footballers. Oh, Tanya, you're not looking happy.

-No!

You've not met any of these in Bradford on a night out?

Now, as always, you're going to try and find the lowest scoring

answer, a nice obscure national team for one of these footballers.

What are you thinking?

Er...

I'll go for...

Thomas Muller,

-Germany?

-Sounds good!

Thomas Muller, Germany, says Tanya.

Let's see if that's right and let's see how many of our 100 people knew that. Germany.

Absolutely right, Tanya. Well guessed.

31.

Brilliant.

-Germany.

-Well done, Tanya. A good bit of detective work there.

He scored five goals for Germany in the 2010 World Cup.

Now then, Judy.

-How are we feeling about this board?

-I haven't got a clue.

Have a bit of fun saying the names to yourself and see

if anything springs to mind.

Drazen Jerkovic... Whatever he's called. Um...

I'll go for Hungary.

Drazen Jerkovic. You're going to say Hungary.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Hungary.

Ooh!

Bad luck, Judy. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

That scores you the maximum of 100. I'm sorry.

Yeah, sorry, Judy. It's a good name for a Bond villain, not from Hungary, I'm afraid.

-I'll give you the correct answer at the end of the pass.

-Now then, Mike.

-I have a feeling this will be quite good for you.

-Not at all.

-Oh, really?

-No. I know nothing about football whatsoever.

-Oh, I thought you were going to tidy up here.

-No.

-Um, it's going to have to be a guess.

-OK.

Mario Kempes. Italy?

Mario Kempes, Italy, says Mike.

Let's see if it is right and if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer. Italy.

Oh, no, bad luck, Mike. I'm afraid, another incorrect answer.

Scoring you 100 points. Richard.

Yeah, sorry, Mike, Mario Kempes scored six goals in 1978 for Argentina.

Argentina, I'm afraid, would have scored you 12 points.

Drazen Jerkovic, actually the best answer on the board,

it's a very tough answer. It was from 1962 and he scored for Yugoslavia.

Very well done if you said that. It's the best answer up there.

Eusebio, one of the most famous footballers of all time,

won the Golden Boot in 1966 for Portugal,

would have scored you 23 points.

Ronaldo won it much more recently.

Ronaldo won it in 2002, scored eight goals for Brazil.

That's the Brazilian Ronaldo, not the Portuguese one. 33 there.

And Davor Suker is Croatian.

He would have scored you seven points.

Well done if you got all of those.

Thanks very much, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's look at the scores - both of them.

LAUGHTER

Tanya and Lewis, looking very strong indeed on 31,

and then all the way up to 100,

where we find Judy and Mary and Mike and Mick.

Quite a party going on at number 100.

So yes, Mick and Mary, you're going to duke it out

to see which stays and which leaves us at the end of the round.

Very best of luck. We'll come back down the line now.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK. We're going to put six more footballers on the board

and here they come. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Six footballers.

Remember, we are looking for the national teams

for which these winners of the Golden Shoe played.

Mick, when you're doing your MCing,

do you have a big frilly shirtfront?

-Yeah.

-Good.

-Yeah, the old bow tie. Yeah.

Just a bit disappointed you're not wearing it today, but there we are.

Now then, Mick, you're joint high scorer on 100.

-Well, there's one I'm pretty sure you'll know there.

-Yeah. Yeah.

You won't be going for that one.

We're not big into football, but if I take the one we know,

Gary Lineker, England.

Gary Lineker, England, says Mick

-and you're hoping that's going to score less than 100 points.

-Well...

-They're next!

-Yeah, I know. Good point. Very good point.

There's no red line for you, as you are joint high scorers.

You just have to hope that Gary Lineker and England take you down

as far as they can on that column.

OK, Gary Lineker. How many people said England?

Absolutely right.

70! There you go.

APPLAUSE

Well done, Mick. Takes your total up to 170. Richard.

-That is lower than you'd expect, isn't it?

-Yeah.

He scored six goals in 1986 to win the Golden Boot in that tournament.

Now then, Mary...

-I don't know anything about football.

-OK.

I'm going to have a go

at Paolo Rossi.

Just because the name looks Italian, I'll say Italy.

Paolo Rossi, Italy, says Mary.

There is your red line.

If you get below the red line, you are through to the next round.

Paolo Rossi, sounds pretty good for Italy. Is it right?

How many people said Italy?

-It's right.

-Well done!

And you are through to the next round.

Very, very well done, Mary.

Wow.

33.

133 is your total and you're in the head-to-head.

Very well done. Richard?

Yeah, that was a game of what nationality

does Paolo Rossi sound like he is?

You know, he's not Dutch, I'll tell you that.

He won the Golden Boot in 1982, Paolo Rossi.

Lewis. You're through to the head-to-head. This is good news.

I have a feeling you're going to be quite good on this, though.

Take us to the board.

I could've taken you through the last board.

A lot more familiar names in that.

I'm struggling on this one.

For some reason I think Lato is Greek. Um...

I would guess Salenko is Ukraine.

I've heard of Kocsis, but I've just heard of him.

So I'll probably go for Lato and Greece.

You're going to go with Grzegorz Lato, Greece?

Let's see if that's right,

and, if it is, let's see how any people said it.

Bad luck, incorrect. Couldn't matter less, though.

Scores you 100 points, takes your total up to 131

but you are through to the head-to-head anyhow.

-So, Richard?

-Sorry, Lewis, scored seven goals in 1974 for Poland.

Well done if you said that. Lato would have scored you 6 points.

The man who scored the most goals in a World Cup final Just Fontaine,

scored 13 for France.

He would have scored you 12.

Oleg Salenko scored six goals, scored five goals against Cameroon

in a World Cup final for Russia.

That would have scored you 7.

Sandor Kocsis, Judy, if you'd been the other way round,

it would have been a perfect answer cos he's Hungarian.

Hungary the answer there, 9 points.

The best answer on that board is Lato, for 6 points.

-Notice how I stay off the Christian name there?

-Yeah.

-"Jiggosh"?

-How are you saying that?

-"Jiggosh."

-"Jiggosh"? Are you sure?

No, no idea.

LAUGHTER

There we are. OK. Thanks, Richard.

At the end of Round Two, the pair with a highest score

who'll be leaving us, I'm afraid, it's Mick and Mike.

Bad luck. I thought you were just going to brilliant at that!

-No, not football.

-Well, I'm afraid we have to say goodbye to you.

The good news is we'll see you again next time.

The better news is you're going to do an MC introduction for us. Yes!

Thanks very much for playing. Mick and Mike, great contestants.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining two pairs, things get more exciting as we enter the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

Well, congratulations Lewis and Tanya, Mary and Judy.

You are now only one round away from the final

and a chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at £5,000.

AUDIENCE: Oooh!

Now, obviously only one pair can go through to the final

and play for that money.

To decide which pair it is going to be,

you are now going to go head-to-head.

This time, you're allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for the jackpot.

Now then, Lewis and Tanya, you've done incredibly well.

In fact, that last round, the Football round, Lewis,

-Tanya really knew her stuff.

-LAUGHTER

Mary, Judy, how will you feeling it's gone?

Fluke. Just a fluke.

You've done it, though. You've made it through this far

and anything can happen in the head-to-head.

Very, very best of luck to both pairs.

Let's play the head-to-head.

APPLAUSE

OK, here comes your first question.

And it concerns...

Fathers Of The House, Richard?

Fathers Of The House is the term you give to the MP

who's sat in the House of Commons longest.

Been various definitions over the years,

but that's basically what it means.

We'll show you five photographs of MPs

who've been Fathers Of The House.

I have to warn you, before we start, we've got three ladies here -

I know an awful lot of ladies watching at home

and in the audience, some of these guys are HOT.

LAUGHTER Hoo!

-Yeah.

-OK. Forewarned is forearmed.

Let's reveal our five Fathers Of The House. Here they are.

We have got...

Tsss!

Hubba-hubba!

LAUGHTER

There they are, five Fathers Of The House.

Lewis and Tanya, you've played best throughout the show so far,

so you get to go first.

-I've no idea on any of them.

-Churchill, I'd say.

-Which one's that?

-D.

Go on, you can go for it. I think we've got nothing on the others.

It's going to have to be D, Winston Churchill.

D, Winston Churchill.

OK, Mary and Judy, talk us through the board.

A is Ted Heath.

C is James Callaghan.

We think is E might be Rab Butler, but we're not sure.

So we'll go for C, James Callaghan.

C, James Callaghan?

So Lewis and Tanya went with D, Winston Churchill.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people

said D was Winston Churchill.

91.

Nine people didn't recognise that person.

LAUGHTER

Mary and Judy have said that C is James Callaghan.

Let's see if that is right

and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 said James Callaghan.

Well done.

-46.

-APPLAUSE

46. Very well done, Mary and Judy.

After one question you are up 1-0. Richard?

Well played, Mary and Judy.

Good answer. You were right about Edward Heath as well.

He would have scored more points though - he would have scored you 70.

B, he was Leader of the House and 2005 until 2010,

the Labour politician Alan Williams.

He would have been a pointless answer, so well done if you said him.

He would have been a great answer.

E, you were right as well, it would have been a terrific answer.

You won the point anyway, but it is Rab Butler.

Absolutely right and that would have scored you 7 points.

The Fathers Of The House Calendar 2013 is now in all good shops.

LAUGHTER

I recommend you take a cold bath before you look at June.

LAUGHTER

Here comes your second question.

Lewis and Tanya, you've got to win this one to stay in the game.

Best of luck. It concerns...

Films With Animals In The Title, Richard?

We're going to show you the names of five films

which have animals in the title, but we've left out the animal.

Fill in the gaps and give us the most obscure answer.

OK, let's reveal our five films with the animal missing from their title.

And we have got...

I'll read them all one more time, without the dates.

Five film titles with animals missing from the title.

Mary and Judy, you go first this time.

-WHISPERING:

-Gorillas In The Mist?

-Yeah.

And Reservoir Dogs.

-Shall we go for Gorillas In the Mist?

-Yeah.

We'll go for Gorillas In The Mist.

Gorillas In the Mist say Mary and Judy, Gorillas In The Mist.

Lewis and Tanya, talk us through the board and pick one.

I think we've got Chicken Run, The Mighty Ducks,

Big Fish and Reservoir Dogs.

I'm not 100% about The Mighty Ducks.

It's whether to go for Reservoir Dogs or Big Fish.

-WHISPERS:

-Big Fish.

-We'll go for Big Fish.

-Big Fish, say Lewis and Tanya. Big Fish.

So, Mary and Judy went for Gorillas In The Mist.

Let's see if that's right, and, if it is,

let's see how many of our 100 people said Gorillas In The Mist.

It's right.

73.

APPLAUSE

Lewis and Tanya have gone for Big Fish.

Let's see if that is right. If it is, how many people said it?

This is the question you have to win to stay in the game.

It's right. Will it go lower than 73?

Yes, it will.

Oh, good answer.

-Look at that, 2!

-Wow!

APPLAUSE

Very, very well done, Lewis and Tanya.

Big Fish, great answer.

All of which means, after two questions, you are one apiece.

-Very well done. Richard?

-Well played, Lewis and Tanya.

Tim Burton film, of course, Big Fish. Let's fill in the rest.

You were right, Chicken Run.

It would have scored you 30 points.

The Mighty Ducks was correct. That would have scored you 24.

You weren't certain whether to go for Big Fish or Reservoir Dogs.

Do you think Reservoir Dogs would score more than 2?

-Quite considerably.

-Reservoir Dogs scored as many as Winston Churchill.

-It scored 91 points.

-Wow.

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Here comes your third question, the decider.

Whoever wins this goes through to the final and plays for that jackpot.

Our third question concerns...

The Caribbean, Richard?

Yeah, five clues to facts about the Caribbean Sea and its islands.

Very, very best of luck to both teams.

OK. Let's reveal our five clues to facts about the Caribbean.

Here they are. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Lewis and Tanya, you go first this time.

-WHISPERING:

-I don't know any of these.

It's Trinidad and Tobago.

We're going to go with the island which forms a nation with Trinidad

and...Tobago?

Tobago, you're going to say? Tobago.

Now, Mary and Judy...

-talk us through the board.

-Wish we could!

We'll have a go at, um...

..the self-governing territory, just a guess at Puerto Rico.

Puerto Rico, you're going to say? We have Tobago and Puerto Rico.

Lewis and Tanya have gone with Tobago

as the island which forms and a nation with Trinidad.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many people said that. Tobago.

It's right.

60.

APPLAUSE

Now, Puerto Rico, say Mary and Judy,

as the internally-governed US territory whose capital is San Juan.

Let's see if that's right. If it is, how many people said Puerto Rico?

Absolutely right.

And it wins you the point.

Very well done. 16 for Puerto Rico.

Mary and Judy, you are through to the final. Very, very well done.

2-1, the final score.

Well played, Mary and Judy, straight through to the final.

Very well played. There's a pointless answer up there.

Let's take a look at a couple of the others first.

Largest island country in the Caribbean, what do you think?

-Jamaica?

-It's not Jamaica. It's Cuba.

-Oh, of course it is.

Very well done if you said that at home.

It would have scored 17 points.

-Jamaican estate where Ian Fleming lived?

-Goldeneye.

Goldeneye, absolutely right. That would have scored you 11.

Noel Coward also lived there.

The channel which links it to the Gulf of Mexico is a pointless answer.

It's the Yucatan Channel. Very well done if you said the Yucatan Channel.

-Pointless.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

Our losing pair at the end of the head-to-head is Lewis and Tanya.

You've come all this way, you've done so well.

And then you've come up against the behemoth that is Mary and Judy.

So we say goodbye to you. But the good news is we'll see you next time

when I am sure you'll do even better.

Thanks so much for playing. Lewis and Tanya, great contestants.

APPLAUSE

But, for Mary and Judy, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Mary and Judy.

You fought off all the competition

and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

At the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £5,000.

You said at the top of the show

that you'd been studying very specifically Liam Neeson.

You decided that's what you were going to study.

I'm afraid he hasn't come up yet. Yet.

Well, that would be the icing on the cake.

I tell you what, I think the spirit of Liam,

he's has been a good mascot for you.

First round, "initial" was one of your answers. Very high score.

Then I think you said Hungary for Jerkovic in the second round,

very high score.

But through you came.

Here you are, in the final round.

-Any chance of Liam Neeson coming up?

-Yeah, no.

-Really?

OK, the rules are very simple.

To win the money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

Do that and you'll go home with that £5,000 jackpot.

First you've got choose a category.

You have these five choices to pick from. They are...

..and Liam Neeson.

LAUGHTER

European Playwrights.

Which of those would you like?

-The only one that makes any sense to me is Powerful People.

-Yeah.

We'll go for Powerful People.

Powerful People. OK, let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

Forbes 100 Most Powerful Women as they could. Richard?

Quite simply we're looking for any of the 100 people on the list

of the 100 most powerful women in the world,

compiled by the 2012 Forbes Magazine, please.

There is no Liam Neeson on this list, I'm afraid.

But very, very best of luck.

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £5,000 jackpot

-is for just one of those answers to be pointless. Are you ready?

-Yes.

Let's put 60 seconds on the clock, there they are.

Your time starts now.

Indira Gandhi? Indira Gandhi?

Yeah. How about, um... Hillary Clinton?

-Jackie Onassis.

-Yeah, Jackie Onassis.

-They don't have to be alive, do they?

-No.

-Um...

Who else is there?

Women, women, women.

We've got...

We could go for Indira Gandhi, Jackie Onassis...

..and Hillary Clinton? I can't really think of any.

What about Margaret Thatcher?

She was powerful in her time, wasn't she?

-She was.

-Influential, anyway.

Who else do you think? Can you think of anybody else?

-Any Americans that you can think of?

-10 seconds left.

-No.

-Just go with those three.

-It's the only three we've got.

-Probably be people we've never heard of.

-OK.

OK, then. Yeah.

OK? Time is up.

We were looking for the Forbes 100 most powerful women.

I now need your three answers.

-Indira Gandhi.

-Indira Gandhi.

-Jackie Onassis.

-Jackie Onassis.

And...

-Hillary Clinton.

-And Hillary Clinton.

Of those three, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Jackie Onassis.

-OK, Jackie Onassis.

OK, we'll put Jackie Onassis last.

-And which is your least likely?

-Hillary Clinton.

Hillary Clinton, we'll put her first.

OK, let's pop them up on the board in that order. Here they are.

We have got...

OK, we were looking for Forbes 100 most powerful women.

Your first answer was Hillary Clinton.

This was your least confident shot at a pointless answer.

You only have to find one pointless answer to win that jackpot.

So, let's see. For £5,000, how many people said Hillary Clinton?

It's right.

37.

APPLAUSE

At least that's right.

37 for Hillary Clinton.

Unfortunately, not a pointless answer.

You only have two more chances to win today's jackpot.

If you won that £5,000, Mary, what would you do?

I would probably put it towards

a laptop for my husband.

Because he's always hogging my computer.

LAUGHTER

Judy, how about you?

I like driving different vehicles and things, so my ambition is to

drive a Chieftain tank, so perhaps I might be able to put that money

-towards finding a tank that's still in existence and...

-Maybe get a Chieftain tank.

-Might be able to buy one, yeah!

-Maybe. Very best of luck.

Two more answers for you to win that jackpot with.

We're looking for Forbes 100 most powerful women.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, Indira Gandhi.

Again, this has to be correct

and it has to be pointless to win that jackpot.

For £5,000, let's see how many people said Indira Gandhi.

Oh.

-Surprise, surprise.

-Bad luck, I'm afraid.

That's an incorrect answer, which means you only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

Everything is now riding on Jackie Onassis.

We are looking for Forbes 100 most powerful women.

You said this was your most confident shot at a pointless answer

and it has to be right then pointless for you

to win the jackpot. Let's find out.

For £5,000, let's see how many people said Jackie Onassis.

-Never mind.

-Bad luck!

I'm afraid you didn't manage to find

that all-important pointless answer,

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £5,000,

which rolls onto the next show, but you have been fantastic contestants.

You do, of course, get to take home our Pointless trophy, so very, very well done.

Unlucky. Good answer with the first one. The other two not on the list.

It's an amazing list, if you want to go online

and look at the Forbes 100 most powerful women in the world.

Hillary Clinton number two on the list.

Second most powerful woman in the world.

Who's number one?

Adele.

LAUGHTER

Angela Merkel was number one. Not a pointless answer, though.

Let's take a look at some of those pointless answers.

At the top, the president of Argentina,

Cristina Fernandez De Kirchner,

would have been a pointless answer, surprisingly.

Diane Von Furstenberg, fashion designer, Ellen DeGeneres,

the US talk show host, comedienne.

Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, the president of Liberia.

Gisele Bundchen, who they say is the world's most powerful supermodel.

That would be pretty good on a dating website, wouldn't it?

Your first line,

"Gisele, world's most powerful supermodel."

LAUGHTER

Ho Ching is married to the president of Singapore, a businesswoman.

Marjorie Scardino, the CEO of Pearson, Miuccia Prada,

who works at the Prada fashion label.

And media mogul, Tina Brown. All of those pointless.

There's other ones as well.

Genuinely a very interesting list to look at.

-Unlucky, but very well played.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

Thanks very much. Unfortunately, we have to say goodbye to you, Mary and Judy.

It's been lovely having you here. Thank you for playing.

And playing so well. Brilliant.

APPLAUSE

Nobody's won our jackpot today, which means it rolls over onto

the next show where we'll be playing for £6,000.

APPLAUSE

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd