Episode 4 Pointless

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless, the quiz show

where obvious answers score big and obscure answers score low.

Let's meet today's players.

And couple number one.

Hi, I'm Darren, from Rochdale, this is my niece Grace, from Telford.

Couple number two.

Hi, I'm Sean and this is my mum, Hilary, and we're both from Chippenham in Wiltshire.

And our third couple.

Hi, I'm Mick, this is my son Mike, and we're from Shoeburyness in Southend-on-Sea.

And our last couple.

I'm Tanya, this is my boyfriend Lewis and we're from Bradford.

And these are our contestants.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thanks very much indeed, everyone. We'll find out more about you all throughout the show.

There's only one person left for me to introduce.

If you think you know your obscure knowledge, you're about to be taken down a peg or two.

-He'll even tell you who made the pegs. He's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hiya. Hello.

APPLAUSE

-Afternoon to you.

-And to you, sir.

-How are you?

-I'm very well.

Excellent. We've got three returning pairs today.

-Lewis and Tanya were very strong last time, weren't they?

-Yes.

They'll actually be very hard to beat. They were unlucky to get knocked out in the head-to-head

so it'll be a toughie. We only have one new pair and that's an uncle and niece.

-Quite an unusual combination on our show. It's quite nice, isn't it?

-Very.

-Like it.

-Yeah, I like it, too.

-Must encourage more of that.

-Yes, more of that.

-Aunties and nephews...

-Yeah.

-..great uncles, great nieces, say.

-Oh, that'd be great.

-Cousins.

-Yeah.

What else could you have? LAUGHTER

Like, an aunt but she's not actually your aunt but, you know, you always call her your aunt

-cos she was always at your house cos she was your mum's friend.

-Yeah.

And so she's become more of an aunt than your actual aunt, who you don't see.

Anyway, what a show we have this afternoon. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

All our questions on Pointless have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants need to find the obscure answers that our 100 people didn't get.

What everyone's trying to do is to find a pointless answer that none of our 100 people gave,

and each time that happens we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Nobody won the jackpot last time so we add another £1,000 to that, so today's jackpot starts off

at a whopping £6,000.

CHEERING and APPLAUSE

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, in this round I'll take an answer from each of you but there's to be no conferring.

The pair with the highest score at the end will be eliminated, so try to make sure that's not you.

OK, our first category today is...

It's Classical Music.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second.

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK. The question concerns...

Composers and their countries of birth. Richard.

We've gone high culture for question one, but don't panic.

If you can get through this it's low culture for question two. You'll be fine.

We'll show you the names of seven composers. You need to tell us the name of the modern-day country

in which each was born, please.

Give us a nice obscure answer, you'll score fewer points

but, as always, an incorrect answer will score you 100 points.

As always, by country we mean a member of the UN that is a sovereign state.

-Very best of luck to you and to everyone at home.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

So, looking for the modern-day names of the countries in which these composers were born.

And on our first board we have got:

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Seven composers.

We need the modern-day name of the countries in which they were born.

-Grace, you're going first.

-OK.

-What do you do, Grace?

-I'm at uni at the moment, a student.

-Whereabouts?

-In Leeds.

-I'm at Leeds Met.

-And what are you studying?

-Sport science.

Sport science. How's your classical music?

-Awful.

-LAUGHTER

But I'll give it a stab. The bottom one -

I know there's a pizza called Sloppy Giuseppe.

LAUGHTER

And that's Italian, so I'm going to say Italy.

Giuseppe Verdi, Italy, says Grace.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many people said Italy for Verdi.

Absolutely right.

Not bad at all.

Very good tactics, as you've removed an easier one to guess from the board, so well done. Richard?

I THOUGHT it was a high-culture round. Turns out it wasn't.

A very good way of working that out.

-Yeah, born in 1813, Giuseppe Verdi.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

Now, Hilary.

There's one I think I know but I'm...

Yes, I'm going to go for that.

Hector Berlioz, France.

Hector Berlioz, France, says Hilary.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many said it.

Absolutely right. Very well done.

APPLAUSE

Brilliant. No clues in the name either.

-Great answer. France.

-Yes, well done, Hilary.

As Xander says, no clues in the name there.

It's actual general knowledge being shown there, wasn't it?

Hilary and Sean got knocked out in the first round last time.

Quite unluckily too, so, fingers crossed, that might see you through this time.

-Very well done. Now then, Mike?

-Hello.

-This is good for you.

-I know this plays to your strengths.

-It does not, I'm afraid.

Oh, no, it was boxing, not classical music. Sorry.

We discovered last time that you used to be a bit of a useful boxer.

-Yep, many years ago.

-What are you going to go for?

It's going to have to be a guess, I think.

I'm going Tchaikovsky and Russia.

Tchaikovsky and Russia, says Mike.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many people knew that answer.

Absolutely right.

46 for Tchaikovsky and Russia.

Yeah, well done, Mike. Tchaikovsky, the big Russian. The big Russky.

-Made his first composition when he was four.

-Thanks, Richard.

Now, Tanya. Remind us what happened last time. Talk us through it.

We got through to the head-to-head and obviously it didn't work out.

They got a better answer. Fluked it, but, you know...

-You did very well.

-One better than us.

-You did consistently well last time.

-And you were Richard's tip to do well today.

-No, don't say that.

Oh, no... Ooh, no, I've said it now. It's out!

We thought you might do quite well. I'm still convinced you will.

I think you've jinxed us.

I'm just going to say Sibelius...

and Greece.

Sibelius and Greece.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many people knew that answer. Sibelius, Greece.

Ooh, bad luck, Tanya, bad luck. I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer.

That scores you the maximum of 100 points. I'm really sorry. It's a really tough board, that.

Yeah, sorry, Tanya. Sibelius is actually the best answer on the board

so well done to everyone at home who said Finnish.

Sibelius is Finnish. It would've scored you three points.

Dvorak - where do you think he was born?

He's either Yugoslav or Czech.

Yeah, Czech Republic, absolutely, would've scored four points.

Manuel de Falla?

I think Manuel de Falla... Brazilian?

He's Spanish. Would've scored you 17 points.

-The biggest score on the board is Beethoven...

-Obviously Germany.

..who is German, absolutely right. 55 points.

Well done to anyone who got them all. Very impressive.

Thanks very much. Halfway through the round. Let's look at the scores.

Seven, Hilary. What a beautifully low score there. Single figures.

-That felt good, didn't it?

-It did.

-That could've gone for ever!

-I feel I've redeemed myself slightly.

-You most certainly have. That was a brilliant score.

Then up to 38, where we find Grace and Darren, up to 46, where we find Mike and Mick.

Oh, Tanya and Lewis! Way up on 100, I'm afraid.

So, Lewis, luckily you know your classical composers like that...

LAUGHTER

..I think, so we should be fine. Very, very best of luck.

We'll come back down the line. Can the second players take their places at the podium.

OK, we'll put seven more composers on the board and here they are.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

Remember, we're looking for the modern-day country of birth of these composers,

and obviously, Lewis, you'll try to find the one the fewest of our 100 people knew.

You are riding quite high at the moment. 100 is your score.

Your nearest rivals are on 46. What are you thinking, Lewis?

200? About 200.

LAUGHTER

Erm...

Well, I think I know two

but looking at the scores I don't think it's worth...

I'm going to take a punt on Villa-Lobos

and go for...Portugal.

Portugal.

Villa-Lobos. No red line for you, you're already the high scorers,

but let's see, Villa-Lobos, Portugal. Is that right? How many people said it if it is?

No. Bad luck!

I'm sorry, Lewis, I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer,

so you score the maximum of 100 points, taking your total to 200. I'm sorry. Richard?

Yes. Sorry, Lewis. You did exactly what you had to.

No point going for one of the obvious ones. You had to take a risk and I'm sorry it didn't pay off.

-I'll give the correct answer at the end of the pass.

-Thanks, Richard.

Mick, last time you promised us that if you came through to this show you were going to...

Cos of course Mick is an occasional boxing MC.

You were going to do a big boxing intro for a little bout between the big man and me.

-And then we're going to fight.

-Then we're going to fight!

-Will you do it in your biggest and best MC voice?

-Right.

-You ready?

-Oh, I think so.

BOXING-STYLE INTRO MUSIC PLAYS

OK, ladies and gentlemen, here we go, then!

A fight you've all been waiting for, the bout of the night,

introducing in the Host Corner,

Alexander "the Hammer" Armstrong!

The Hammer?

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

His opponent in the Laptop Corner,

Richard "the Quizmaster" Osman!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

BELL RINGS

-Let's see your reach. Do that. Do an arm up.

-Oh, my God...

-Oh, that was...

-That was...

-Can you come on every show?

-Oh, wouldn't that be brilliant?

-That's really buoyed me up.

-Yeah!

-Oh!

That was fantastic, Mick. Very, very well done. Good news, you're through to the next round...

AUDIENCE GROANS

Bad news, I want an answer from you.

OK, the high-scorers, you'll never catch up with them, Lewis and Tanya,

they're on 200 points. You're on 46.

But see if there's someone on that board you can name a birth country of.

I know a few of them but, being as there's nothing to lose

I'm going to go for Heitor Villa-Lobos,

which sounds...Spanish.

-You are going to say?

-Spain.

-Spain for Heitor Villa-Lobos.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, how many of our 100 people said it.

Bad luck. Good punt, though.

It was wrong. Scores you 100, takes your total up to 146

but you're through to the next round so it doesn't matter.

Yeah, exactly what to do, Mick. You have to take a risk if you're going through.

So he's not Spanish and he's not Portuguese. (What is he?)

-What is he? He's something.

-What are you, Heitor?

LAUGHTER

-Oh, looking to finding out!

-Yeah. Sean, remind us what you do.

I am recently graduated from a sports journalism degree

and now I'm freelancing a bit.

-How's classical music in your...?

-It's not up there, I'm not going to lie.

But based off some of the guesses we've had so far

and going purely on geography,

I am going to go Heitor Villa-Lobos...

Do you know what? Because actually, if you don't know anything about classical music,

knowing a bit about international football would be useful.

It'll probably help you locate some of these.

I wouldn't do this if we weren't already through.

This is just a bit of fun. So...

-It might be a pointless answer.

-I'm going to go for Andorra.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

That's superb, isn't it?

Absolutely brilliant.

Heitor Villa-Lobos...

LAUGHTER

-I'm sensing that may not be right.

-I did not think you were going to say that.

LAUGHTER

OK, Andorra.

Let's see if it's right and, if it is, let's see how many people said Andorra for Heitor Villa-Lobos.

Ooh! Bad luck.

-I was so sure(!)

-I'm afraid an incorrect answer, scores you 100, takes your total to 107

but you're through to the next round so who cares.

Of all the countries left in the world...

to pick virtually the smallest.

Again, we'll find out where he's from.

-I hope Darren has a go as well.

-He's not Central African Republic, is he?

-That would be good.

-Now, Darren, tell us a bit about yourself.

-What do you do?

-I'm a police officer.

-Are you?

-What department of policing do you cover?

-I'm in safeguarding now.

-Safeguarding.

-Yeah.

-What is that?

-We deal with vulnerable adults and children who...

-I see.

Yeah, who might be being taken down the wrong path.

-Right. Oh, he's a NICE policeman.

-Really...

-Sometimes...

Hold on, hold on, hold on.

You're saying, "Oh, he's a nice policeman," as opposed to...?

Well, just sometimes policemen can be quite hard, quite hard-edged.

-Sometimes they have to be...

-They have to be.

-..because of the job they do.

-Exactly!

They don't just stand up there in a suit and ask questions.

LAUGHTER

-That's... That is sometimes what they do.

-Sometimes they do, actually. Yeah, they do.

I'm glad they're hard-edged cos they do a difficult job, and thank you.

There we are. I'm just saying. There we are.

Now, Darren, let's get out of this...this cul-de-sac!

We are looking for the modern-day countries which are home to the birthplaces of these composers.

Erm... You've probably never had the same answer four times in a pass

-so...

-OK, here goes!

-..I'll give it a go, cos Richard wants me to!

-We'll go for Brazilian.

-Darren, the nice copper,

is going to go for Heitor Villa-Lobos,

Brazil.

I have a very good feeling about this. There's no red line for you

as you're already through, but Brazil, Heitor Villa-Lobos.

Is it right? How many people said it?

-It's right!

-CHEERING

Very, very well done indeed. Down it goes, Villa-Lobos.

Oh!

CHEERING

The crowning glory, Darren.

That is a pointless answer!

It adds 250 quid to today's jackpot, takes the total up to £6,250.

-And it earns you a very well deserved...

-Everything else had been eliminated.

It was the only one that I could say.

That leaves your total at a very impressive 38. Very well done. A tough round.

Yeah. Well played, everyone, in that round, I must say. So it turns out he wasn't Andorran.

LAUGHTER

It turns out he was Brazilian Let's take a look...

Blimey, look how much of the board we've got to fill in!

-Franz Liszt, do you know that?

-Well, he's sort of Eastern European.

-He is.

-He's... I'm going to plum for Hungary.

You're absolutely right. He's Hungarian. Absolutely right. Would've scored two points.

-Richard Wagner?

-German.

Absolutely. Would've scored 40. Mozart?

-Austrian.

-Austrian, yup. 49.

-Chopin?

-Oh! Erm...

I'm going to say he's...Romania.

He's not, I'm afraid. He's from Andorra.

LAUGHTER

-Where is he from?

-No, he's from Poland.

-Oh, he's Poland.

Polish. That would have scored four.

-John Cage?

-America.

-Absolutely right.

That would've scored 12. And Edvard Grieg?

-Norway.

-Norwegian, yup. That would've scored you 13.

Very well done if you got all those at home. Very well done if you got Brazil, and not on your fourth guess.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. At the end of our first round

the pair who will be leaving us with their very high score of 200 points,

I'm really sorry to say it's our nearly elite champions of last time,

Lewis and Tanya.

-I knew John Cage as well.

-Oh, no. So had you gone the other way round...

Yeah, cos I'm guessing you knew something from the first.

She could've just said Beethoven and played it safe.

-And we'd have gone through.

-Oh, well, NOW, Lewis! NOW the expert!

Listen, Lewis and Tanya, you were brilliant last show and I know you would've been brilliant again.

Someone had to go out this question. I am afraid it was you.

Very tough indeed but you've played so well. Sorry to say goodbye to you so soon this show.

But, Lewis, Tanya, lovely contestants. Thanks so much for playing.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs it's now time for round two.

Now, sadly, another pair will be leaving us at the end of this round.

I'm just wondering which pair it's going to be.

We actually scored 400. We had four 100s in that last round.

But Darren and Grace, not you.

We had Verdi - great answer in from Grace.

And, Darren - Heitor Villa-Lobos. We're never going to forget him!

It's a bit embarrassing. I've stolen it, haven't I? Everyone else had all the obvious answers.

It was brilliant, though. Fantastic! And a pointless to boot, so very good.

It's a new category so anything could happen. Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for round two is...

From Composers to Superheroes.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second.

And whoever is going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

..actors who've played superheroes on film. Richard?

Yes, in a moment Xander will show you a list of four superheroes

and we're looking for the name of any actor who's played any of those superheroes

in a feature film up to August 2012, please. Has to be a feature film.

We're not looking for made-for-TV series or cartoons, voice-overs, straight-to-video,

things like that. Just any actor who's played any of these four people in a feature film

prior to August 2012. Very best of luck at home.

So, as Richard mentioned, we'll put four superheroes on the board

and they will stay there throughout the round, and they are...

I'll read those all again.

So remember, we are looking for the names of any actors who have played any of these superheroes.

Grace?

OK... I don't really know anything.

I'll just have to guess a name.

I'll go for...Spider-Man,

-Toby...Blackman.

-Toby Blackman.

OK, let's see if that's right, if it is, let's see how many people said Toby Blackman.

Ooh! Bad luck, Grace. Bad luck.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer, as you probably suspected.

-It scores you the maximum of 100.

-I knew the face, just not the name.

-Bad luck.

Honor Blackman?

-Yeah, it would also have been an incorrect answer, to be fair.

-Obviously.

-Oh, no, she played Hulk, once, didn't she?

-Yes. Famously.

Yeah. Yeah, sorry, Grace, can't accept it.

-Now then, Sean.

-Hello.

-Sean.

You don't need to say which character it is,

just give the name of any actor who's played one of these.

On film.

I think the first Batman in the feature films was Michael Keaton.

Michael Keaton, says Sean. Let's see if Michael Keaton is right,

let's see how many of our 100 said Michael Keaton.

There we are. It's right.

28.

APPLAUSE

28 for Michael Keaton.

Well done, Sean.

He was in Batman and Batman Returns.

Now then, Mick.

I'll also go for Batman, and I think that...Val Kilmer.

Val Kilmer, says Mick.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Val Kilmer.

17! Very well done indeed, Mick.

Great answer. Good score.

Well played, Mick, he was in Batman Forever.

OK, we're halfway through the round. Let's see how the scores are lying.

17 is the lowest score, Mick and Mike,

looking pretty strong on that. Up to 28, we find Sean and Hilary.

Then, oh no, Grace and Darren on 100.

Darren, you've got a bit of time to think of a really good answer

that might just be enough to save you.

Who knows what might happen next pass. Best of luck.

Coming back down the line now.

Can the second players take their places at the podium?

Now then, Mike. Mick has left you in pretty good shape there.

17's your score, the high score is 100, where Darren and Grace are.

Means you can score 82 or less and still be through to the next round.

Which would be fine if I knew one.

It's just going to have to be a guess, I think.

Michael Caine.

Michael Caine.

For fun, tell us which superhero...

LAUGHTER

-Please say Hulk.

-He could have been Spider-Man!

-He could have been.

OK, here's your red line.

If you get below that red line with Michael Caine,

you're through to the next round.

Let's see how many people said Michael Caine.

Bad luck, Mike.

I'm afraid that scores you 100 points, takes you up to 117.

Sorry, Mike, obviously Michael Caine was in the recent Batman films,

but as Alfred the butler.

Now then, Hilary. Hilary.

You're on 28, the high scorers on 117 are Mick and Mike.

If you can score 88 or less with this,

you are through to the next round. How are you feeling?

OK. Not too bad. I know a couple.

One is really obvious, I think,

but I think to be on the safe side

I'll go with Christopher Reeve played Superman.

Christopher Reeve, says Hilary. There is your red line.

If you get below that with Christopher Reeve you're through to the next round.

Let's see how may people said Christopher Reeve.

Well done, you've done it.

Wow, 29!

That's a great score, Hilary, takes your score up to 57.

Very well done, you. Very low for Christopher Reeve, isn't it?

It's quite low, I suppose.

But again, you know, you're naming all the different people,

and some of the younger people of our 100 wouldn't remember him as well.

-Superman four times, Christopher Reeve.

-OK. Thanks very much.

So remember, we're looking for actors who have played any of these superheroes on film.

Now then, Darren, this is exciting. High score is 117 for Mike and Mick.

You're on 100. You have to score 16 or less to stay with us.

Do you think you can do it?

-I have an answer that's got a chance, I think.

-This is good.

The last Superman film,

I think the name of the actor who played Superman was Brandon Routh.

Brandon Routh. There's your red line.

Now, that's the sort of name that I think deserves to

go below that red line.

Sorry, Brandon, if you're watching. I don't mean that.

I know you've done a brilliant job on the movie.

Just, I haven't really heard of him.

I don't suppose he's heard of me either, so that's fair.

Brandon Routh. Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many of our 100 people said Brandon Routh.

It's right.

You've done it!

Oh, very well done, Darren.

Fantastic. Exactly what you needed to do.

One for Brandon Routh takes your total up to 101, you are through

to the head-to-head. Brilliantly played. Richard.

Wow - two answers, one point from Darren so far. Very good.

Yeah, 2006 he was in Superman Returns, Brandon Routh.

There's only one pointless answer on the whole list,

so that was a terrific answer, and that was the first ever

Superman on feature film, played by George Reeves.

There's Brandon Routh.

Mark Ruffalo, the Hulk in Avengers Assemble, he's brilliant in that.

He would have scored 2 points, so that would have been a terrific answer.

I'll go through the answers we would have accepted.

For Batman, there's Michael Keaton, we've had him already, 28.

Christian Bale would have scored you 21. Val Kilmer, we've had, 17.

Adam West, who was in a 1966 Batman film in the cinemas, 15.

And George Clooney would have just scored you 12,

he was in Batman and Robin.

Hulk, we've had Edward Norton for 4, Eric Bana for 3,

and Mark Ruffalo for 2.

-Spider-Man, Tobey Maguire.

-I knew it was Toby! Toby!

He was who you were thinking of.

Tobey Maguire would have scored 13 points as well.

And more recently, Andrew Garfield,

who took over from him, would have scored 3 points.

And Superman - Christopher Reeve we've already had,

Brandon Routh, we've already had, and there's George Reeves.

Brilliant. Well summed up.

And Christopher Reeve was the top answer of anyone.

Really? There you are. Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

At the end of Round Two, the losing pair, with a high score of 117,

I'm afraid is Mike and Mick.

-Bad luck, bad luck. Michael Caine, though.

-I had to go for a punt.

That would have been fun. He might have done, you never know!

I'm so sorry, though. That was a tough round. We said this was back to low culture,

-but it actually was quite a testing round.

-What, who played Hulk?

-I have no idea.

-I've just told you.

-I wasn't listening.

LAUGHTER

I could see you - oh, I saw your mouth moving!

In my head, all I could hear was...

HE SINGS A TUNE

I was thinking about what I was going to have for supper.

-Oh, what are you going to have?

-Steak.

-Are you?

-Yeah.

-That'll be nice.

-Yeah, yeah.

Well, Mike, Mick. I'm so sorry we have to say goodbye to you so soon

but it's been great having you on both shows.

Thank you so much for playing. Great contestants.

APPLAUSE

For the remaining two pairs

it's about to get even more exciting, in the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Darren and Grace, Sean and Hilary.

You're one round from the final and a chance to play for the jackpot,

-which currently stands at £6,250.

-APPLAUSE

Only one pair can play for that money,

and, to decide which, you're now going to go head-to-head.

You are now allowed to confer

and the first pair to win two questions will play for the jackpot.

Well, Darren and Grace, you've done phenomenally well. Some very good scoring there.

But I have to say,

Uncle Darren has been doing the heavy lifting, Grace.

I need to pull my finger out.

A little bit of input from you at this stage wouldn't go amiss.

-All I'm saying.

-I want a good subject, that's why. My subject.

-OK.

-Good subject. You heard what she said.

-I'll see what I can do.

Sean and Hilary, some fantastic consistent low answering from you,

so very, very well done. I'm still very impressed by Hector Berlioz.

In my opinion, the best answer of the show so far,

so thank you very much for that. Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here comes your first question. And it concerns...

Golfers.

Golfers, Richard.

Yeah, quite a complicated one, so if you listen up carefully...

I'm going to show you five pictures now of golfers.

Who are they?

LAUGHTER

Got it. OK. Thanks, Richard.

Let's reveal our five golfers, and here they come. We have got.

OK. Now, Darren and Grace, you have played best throughout the show

so far, so you get to go first.

THEY CONFER

-OK. What are we going to go for?

-We're going to go for

C, Ernie Els.

C, Ernie Els. Sean and Hilary.

We only know two that are up there,

and we think they're the obvious ones.

We're just going to have to take a complete guess.

Were going to go for A, and Ian Poulter.

A, Ian Poulter.

A, Ian Poulter.

So, we have C, Ernie Els, and A, Ian Poulter.

Darren and Grace said that C was Ernie Els, let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

Absolutely right.

It's a good answer. Look at that. 18. Well done.

APPLAUSE

Sean and Hilary have said Ian Poulter for A.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said Ian Poulter.

Bad luck. Bad luck.

Well done, though, Darren and Grace. After one question

-you are up 1-0.

-What are they teaching you

at sports journalism college, just out of interest?

-Not golf!

-Golf wasn't a big one.

They like wearing a hat, don't they, golfers?

Not many sportspeople do. Imagine if football was played in hats.

-I'd say it's the sport's loss.

-Be quite fun, wouldn't it?

A is not Ian Poulter, it's Phil Mickelson. The American.

Would have scored you 8 points.

Plays left-handed, but he's right-handed -

he played mirroring his father. His father showed him how to play,

so he was playing with the left hand to his father's right hand.

-Amazing.

-B is the best answer on the board.

He's been world number one, it's the Englishman Luke Donald.

He would have scored you 3.

Seen Ernie Els there, 18.

D is Rory McIlroy, he would have scored 21 -

that number will go up in the next few years, I suspect.

And E, of course, Tiger Woods. Tiger would have scored you 74.

Two over par. Little golf joke there. LAUGHTER

Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

Now here comes your second question. Sean and Hilary,

we need you to win this question to stay in the game.

Best of luck. It concerns...

..Dundee.

LAUGHTER

Dundee. Why not? Go on.

OK.

We're going to give you five clues now

to facts about the Scottish city of Dundee.

-Can you answer the most obscure of these, please?

-OK. Thanks, Richard.

Let's reveal five clues to facts about Dundee.

And here they come. We have got...

I'll just read those again.

There we are. Five clues to facts about Dundee.

-Sean and Hilary, you go first.

-Right.

Not amazing, but I think that

the nut which traditionally covers a Dundee cake is almond.

OK, you're going to say an almond. An almond nut. Darren and Grace.

Talk us through the board.

-THEY LAUGH

-We don't know the name of the poet.

I've seen Billy Connolly read it on the telly,

that's as much as I know about it.

The preserve, we could just guess at jam or marmalade, not sure.

Going to have a guess at the polite term for a citizen of Dundee

being a Dundonian.

A Dundonian. So, we have almond and Dundonian.

Sean and Hilary, hoping to win this question, you've gone for almond.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said almond.

It's right. 52.

APPLAUSE

-Everything now hangs on whether or not you've just made this up.

-Yeah.

But it could be right. Dundonian.

We did make it up, but I think it might be right.

It's polite, I'll give you that.

Dundonian, say Darren and Grace - is it right

and, if it is, how many people said it?

It's right! Very well done indeed.

And it sees you through to the final, look at that.

Brilliant. 18.

APPLAUSE

It's like Brazil all over again.

Very well done indeed. Dundonian, only 18, beats almond on 52,

which means after only two questions, Darren and Grace,

-you are through to the final 2-0.

-Brilliant. Very well played, guys.

Famous Dundonians include Brian Cox - the actor,

not the astrophysicist - and Edwyn Collins the singer.

-That's as good as I can do.

-It's good.

Let's look at the rest of the answers.

The poet known for his work about the 1879 railway bridge disaster?

-William McGonagall.

-William McGonagall.

Commonly known as the worst poet in the world.

Would have scored you 7. The preserve, it was jam or marmalade.

-Marmalade.

-Absolutely right. It would have scored you 31.

And the firth that the city stands on is the Firth of Tay.

-Firth of Tay, yeah.

-That would have scored 12 points.

So William McGonagall the best answer there. Worst poet, best answer.

OK. So our losing pair at the end of the head-to-head round,

I'm afraid, Sean and Hilary. I'm so sorry.

You've done brilliantly, very consistently throughout the show.

-We had fun.

-Great fun.

Well, it's been lovely having you on the show,

but you came up against Darren and Grace, the unstoppable force.

-Brilliant, yeah.

-Thank you for playing,

it's been lovely having you on the show. Great contestants.

-Sean and Hilary.

-APPLAUSE

But for Darren and Grace it's now time for our Pointless final.

Well, congratulations, Darren and Grace. You fought off

all the competition and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot.

And at the end of today's show the jackpot stands at £6,250.

APPLAUSE

Well, you've done very, very well so far. Still, I think

-Uncle Darren is doing the heavy lifting.

-I knew most of the golfers!

-She knew all the golfers.

-Well, there you are.

-Who came up with Ernie Els?

-Me. I knew that.

-Well, there you are!

-I take that back!

-Give me some credit.

-So what do you hope

is going to come up, in this round?

Well, I do sport science and I'm quite good at biology

-and the body and stuff like that.

-OK.

Any other sort of weird particular things that you know lots about?

-Pop music, current music. Stuff like that.

-OK. Darren.

What can you add to that?

-I tend to be a jack of all trades, master of none, really.

-Perfect.

Perfect qualification. Well, the rules as you know are very simple.

All you have to do is find a pointless answer.

Do that, you will go home with £6,250.

First you have to choose a category, and here are your five options.

They are...

We don't know most of them. Maybe a bit of Science, obviously.

Go for Science

-and hope we don't stand looking blankly for 60 seconds.

-Yeah.

OK. Science. Who do you think is going to be stronger on science?

-Maybe.

-This is her moment.

-If it's not chemistry or physics, we might be all right.

-OK.

Very good. Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many chemical elements

whose symbols end in a vowel as they could. Richard.

Yes, we're looking for any established chemical element

whose symbol ends with a vowel, please.

We won't accept iodine, oxygen and uranium, which are I, O and U,

but any established chemical element whose symbol ends in a vowel.

-Very, very best of luck.

-OK.

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers,

and all you need to win that £6,250

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

Are you ready? OK. Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

THEY CONFER

Is, like, boron Bo or is that just B?

Yeah, tungsten, Tu?

Tu. I think we just maybe...

Tungsten, xenon.

-Beryllium?

-Is helium He?

Beryllium might be Be?

-Right, OK.

-OK, you're happy with the ones you've got?

-Yes.

-Very good.

We'll stop the clock there.

We were looking for chemical elements

whose symbol ends in a vowel. I now need your three answers.

What are you going to give me?

-We're going to go for beryllium.

-Beryllium.

-Tungsten.

-Tungsten.

-And xenon.

And xenon. Of those three which do you think is your best?

-Possibly xenon.

-Xenon's your best shot at a pointless answer.

-Yeah.

OK, we'll put xenon last.

-Which do you think is your least likely to be pointless?

-Beryllium?

-Yeah.

-Beryllium.

-Beryllium. We'll put that first. OK.

Let's pop those up on the board, and here they are.

We've got beryllium, tungsten, xenon.

OK. So we were looking for chemical elements whose symbols

end with a vowel.

You only need to find one pointless answer, remember,

to win that jackpot of £6,250.

So let's see how many people said beryllium.

Is it right?

It's absolutely right.

Good start.

Down it goes into the 40s, into the 30s,

still going down through the 20s into the teens.

Into single figures, still going down. Look at that.

Oh, 1!

AUDIENCE GASPS

1 for beryllium!

APPLAUSE

That was a brilliant answer, absolutely fantastic,

but unfortunately, just one person knew it.

Who is that person?

Unfortunately, not a pointless answer,

which means you have two more chances to win today's jackpot.

Looking very strong if that was your weakest answer,

and it scored only 1.

So if you were to walk out of here with £6,250,

what would be the first thing you would spend it on? Grace?

Well, there's a few things. Obviously, I'm still at uni.

When I leave uni I need to get some savings towards, like, a house

and buying my own car and stuff like that, so savings.

OK, so savings. Very good. Darren.

My wife's been poorly this year, she's had breast cancer,

but she's recovering now,

so a city break for the two of us would be lovely.

And my daughters are 12 and 13,

so I think the Trafford Centre might benefit a little bit there as well.

Well, very best of luck to both of you.

We're looking for chemical elements whose symbols end in a vowel.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, tungsten.

Again, this has to be correct, then it has to be pointless

for you to win that jackpot.

If it's both those things, you leave here with £6,250.

Let's see how many people said tungsten.

Oh, no!

Bad luck. An incorrect answer. We'll discover in a moment why.

You only have one chance to win today's jackpot.

We are looking for chemical elements whose symbols end with a vowel.

Your third and final answer was xenon.

You thought this was your most likely shot at a pointless answer.

So to win that jackpot of £6,250 this has to be pointless.

Let's find out how many people said xenon. Is it right?

It's right.

OK, beryllium took us all the way down to 1.

Tungsten turned out to be an incorrect answer.

But xenon, your most confident shot at a pointless answer,

is still going down.

Oh! 3!

3!

APPLAUSE

Well, out of your three answers, two of them were absolutely fantastic.

Two really good answers. Tantalisingly close.

That beryllium one!

Unfortunately, though,

I'm afraid you didn't manage to find a pointless answer,

which means I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £6,250.

But you've been amazing contestants,

it's been brilliant, thank you so much for playing. Brilliant.

APPLAUSE

And you do of course get to take home the pointless trophy,

-so very well done. Richard.

-Yeah, tough luck.

You played so well throughout and great answers there as well.

Tungsten is W, comes from its old name of wolfram.

And there is currently no chemical symbol Tu. Doesn't exist.

Something will nab it sooner or later. Quite a few

pointless answers, you'll know some.

People at home will have got some of these too.

Let's look at some of them.

Cerium is Ce, cobalt is Co,

germanium Ge,

lutetium Lu, nickel Ni, was a pointless answer,

Nobelium, that's No,

plutonium, Pu, polonium, Po, selenium, Se, there's a few more.

Bismuth, you could have had, europium, gallium,

holmium, protactinium and tantalum. All of those pointless answers,

so very well done if you said any of those.

-Might you have landed on any of those?

-Nickel.

-We said it afterwards, but there you go.

-Yeah. Not many.

-It's easy after, isn't it?

-It is. It always is.

So easy when he puts them up on the board there.

Unfortunately, we do have to say goodbye to you, Darren and Grace,

but it's been wonderful.

Thank you so much for playing. Great contestants.

APPLAUSE

So nobody has won our jackpot today,

which means it rolls over onto the next show,

where we will be playing for £7,250.

Join us next time to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

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