Episode 49 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

where the aim of the game is to score as few points as you can.

You do that by coming up with answers that no-one else could think of.

Let's meet today's players.

APPLAUSE

And couple number one...

I'm Alan and this is Donna, we're from Coventry and Donna's my partner.

-Couple number two...

-My name's Jackie, this is Julian,

we're from Bournemouth and we're friends.

-Couple number three...

-Hi, I'm Sarah, this is my friend Sam

and we're friends from Thirsk in North Yorkshire.

-And couple number four...

-I'm Mike, this is Sean

and we both study at Sussex University.

These, ladies and gentlemen, are today's contestants.

Thank you very much. We'll find out more about you all throughout the show.

There's one person left to introduce.

He's the man everyone would like to have a pint with,

and having done so, I can tell you it's a fascinating, informative and enlightening lesson

in how to avoid buying a round,

-it's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

-Hiya!

Hi, everyone!

Thanks, Richard. All our questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants need to find the obscure answers those 100 people didn't get.

Everyone's looking to find a pointless answer.

Each time that happens, we will add £250 to the jackpot.

Today's jackpot starts off at £1,000.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

In this first round, I'll take an answer from each of you but there's no conferring.

Whichever pair has the highest score will be eliminated. Try and make sure that's not you.

Our first category today is...

Can you all decide who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, the question concerns...

Characters From US TV Shows.

We're going to show you seven characters from long-running US TV shows.

Tell us the name of the TV show that they starred in.

We'll give you the date the show started, in case they've been in more than one.

There's 14 characters in all,

14 shows to guess at home. Good luck.

We are looking for the long-running US TV shows

in which these characters first appeared.

We have on our first board...

I'll read those again.

There we are,

seven leading characters from long-running US TV shows.

Alan, you're going to find the lowest-scoring one you can.

-Welcome to the show. What do you do?

-I'm a window-fitter.

-How long have you been doing that?

-Since I left school, 28 years now.

-How did you and Donna meet?

-I fitted her windows.

-No!

-LAUGHTER

I should've asked for a bigger discount!

Well, yes, in retrospect, yes.

When you're not fitting windows, what do you like to get up to?

I like to watch sport, play on the Xbox.

Do you ever squeeze in any long-running US TV shows?

Yes, I watch quite a bit,

but I don't recognise all the names that are up there.

I think I'll go for Dana Scully and The X-Files.

The X-Files, Dana Scully.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said The X-Files.

Absolutely right.

-53.

-APPLAUSE

Played by Gillian Anderson, alongside David Duchovny as Fox Mulder.

Over 200 episodes of The X-Files.

Now then, Julian, welcome back. Welcome back.

-Tell us what happened last time.

-We got through to the head-to-head.

I don't know if Jethro Tull comes from East Anglia, but the combination wasn't good for us!

You said Jethro Tull for Benjamin Franklin.

We had a picture of Franklin. He thought it was Jethro Tull!

I wouldn't have known Benjamin Franklin,

but I certainly don't know what Jethro Tull looks like.

He's the absolute spitting image of Benjamin Franklin.

Just identical.

-Wow.

-They were often mixed up.

Which is why Jethro Tull was briefly Vice President of the United States.

-Now, remind us what you do, Julian.

-I'm a sales manager.

-That's right.

-What are your hobbies?

-I sing and perform in musicals and shows,

-and I'm a Scout leader.

-Indeed you are.

-What about US TV shows?

-They're not really very good for me.

I do know one, I think it'll be a high scorer,

but I'll say Joey Tribbiani for Friends.

Friends, says Julian, for Joey Tribbiani.

Let's see if it's right and let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

It's still going. Oh!

-Oh, 43!

-APPLAUSE

That's our best score so far, Julian.

-Low score.

-Surprisingly low.

Perhaps the surname has thrown people. He's just known as Joey.

-There's only 236 episodes of Friends.

-Wow.

It's one of the biggest shows in the history of the world. We've made almost twice as many.

And those guys were on a 1 million an episode.

LAUGHTER

-Wow.

-It's something to think about.

-Isn't it?

Whereas out of us, only I'm on 1 million an episode.

I get paid in stamps. Oh, I am not complaining...

Good. Sounded a bit like you were complaining there.

I was about to phone Sue Barker and have you replaced. You know I can!

I know you could and I know she would. You don't need to say it again.

Sarah, welcome to Pointless again! Remind us what happened with you.

-This is your second appearance.

-It is. We got through to the second round.

-Sadly, we joined the 200 Club.

-Yes, you did.

-That was a big score.

-It wasn't a good round for us.

It was a tough second round - countries and their medals.

Now then, we are looking for the long-running US TV shows

in which these were characters.

-What are you going to go for?

-The answer I'll go for,

and I'm not sure if it's correct,

is Sam Malone and Cheers.

Sam Malone and Cheers, says Sarah.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said Cheers.

It's right.

43 - our best score.

Gone through that.

-18! Very well done indeed.

-APPLAUSE

Somewhere, you knew that.

-Cheers.

-Good answer, Sarah. Best answer yet, in fact.

275 episodes of Cheers. Ted Danson played Sam Malone.

Thanks, Richard. Now then, Mike, welcome to the show.

-What do you do, Mike?

-I'm a student at Sussex University.

-Studying?

-Computer science.

-What year are you in?

-Third year.

-It all comes to an end.

-It's getting serious.

-Have you worked out what you're going to do?

-Not really.

I'd like to go into video editing or web design.

-I think that'd be quite interesting.

-Very good.

These are all characters from US TV shows. What were those shows?

I knew four of the answers, three of them have gone,

so I'm not exactly spoilt for choice.

-My maths is pretty good. That means you've one left.

-Yes.

And it is Peter Griffin. He's from Family Guy.

Peter Griffin, Family Guy, says Mike.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said Family Guy.

Absolutely right. 18's been our best score so far.

Let's see where Peter Griffin takes us.

-25.

-APPLAUSE

25 for Family Guy.

Good answer, Mike. Glad that one was left for you. Played by Seth MacFarlane.

-I love Family Guy.

-I love Family Guy.

-Just brilliant.

The other three answers are the hardest ones.

-CJ Parker...

-That one, I know.

-..is from?

-The West Wing.

Ohh! There you are, you see. It's not West Wing.

The clue is the date. That's CJ Cregg.

-CJ Parker...

-Oh!

-It does you great credit not knowing.

..is from Baywatch. LAUGHTER

7 points that would've scored you.

-That's Pamela Anderson's character.

-Terrible!

-I never remembered her name!

-LAUGHTER

I thought the same when it came up. I thought, "Oh, that's West Wing."

-It was about 1999 that West Wing started.

-You're right.

Amanda Woodward, Melrose Place. Well done if you said that. 3 points.

Paul Buchman is from a sitcom that was huge in the States but not over here.

It was called Mad About You. He was played by Paul Reiser.

That would've scored you 2 points. Two of our 100 people knew that.

Thank you, Richard. Let's take a look at those scores.

18, the best score of that pass, Sarah. Well done.

Sarah and Samantha looking pretty strong.

Up to 25, where we find Mike and Sean,

43, where we find Julian and Jackie,

then 53, Alan and Donna.

The first answer also the highest-scoring answer.

-Donna, we need a really good answer to keep you in the game.

-No pressure!

-Best of luck.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

Let's put seven more characters on the board.

We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

We are looking for the long-running US TV shows in which these characters appeared.

-Sean, welcome to the show. You're also at the University of Sussex?

-That's right.

-What are you reading?

-History and film.

-History and film!

-It's a joint course.

-Are you also in your last year?

-Yes.

-Very good.

-It's getting serious.

That why I'm on Pointless!

Good stuff. It's very good preparation for life(!)

-LAUGHTER

-Sean, what are your hobbies?

I like travelling. Whenever I get some spare time, I pack a bag and go somewhere.

-Where's the most exotic place you've ever been?

-I went to Peru.

-That'll do, yes!

-That was good.

-Very good.

That'll be good for any geography rounds that might come up.

You're on 25. The high scorers, a little bit ahead on 53.

If you can score 27 or less, you will avoid becoming the high scorers.

-What do you make of this board?

-Er...

There's only a couple I know for sure.

I'm trying to decide which to go for.

I think I'll go for the last one, Daphne Moon, from Frasier.

Frasier, says Sean.

Here comes your red line. If you get below that, you are through to Round Two.

Let's see if Daphne Moon is Frasier and how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

-Very well done, Sean. Fantastic.

-APPLAUSE

24, taking your total up to 49. Through you go to Round Two.

Played by the brilliant Jane Leeves.

She manages that trick of having a not-very-good English accent, despite coming from England.

-Yes.

-I could never quite work out how that works.

I always think English people in American sitcoms are always on an uphill battle,

-just because American accents sound great on television.

-Yes.

Who wouldn't want to have an American accent and inflection?

-You're good at American accents.

-And then you've got to speak "Liike thaat"...

-Yes.

-Anyway...

Anyway, there we are.

-Samantha, we come to you.

-SHE SIGHS

-How good was Sarah in the first pass?

-Fantastic.

-She did so well.

Lovely low score there.

-Are you feeling confident?

-Absolutely not.

-Really?

I don't watch any American things, apart from The Middle.

That's the only American thing I like.

Samantha, you're on 18. Great score. 53, the high score, Donna and Alan.

If you can score 34 or less, you're in the next round.

-Is there anything on that board you can answer?

-No.

But I will do! I am going to go for Dr John Carter and West Wing.

Dr John Carter, West Wing.

-OK. Well, you're on 18.

-It's a guess.

I said West Wing for the last board. Got it completely wrong.

There's your red line. Below that, you are through to the next round.

Let's see if Dr John Carter is from The West Wing and if he is, how many people said it?

Oh, bad luck, Samantha.

That's an incorrect answer. It scores you 100 points.

-It takes your total up to 118.

-I'm not surprised.

Sorry, Samantha. There is a doctor in The West Wing but it's the president's wife,

so she's not called John Carter. LAUGHTER

Now then, Jackie.

Jackie, welcome back to Pointless.

-Remind us what you do, Jackie.

-I'm an adult education tutor.

-Remind us what your hobbies are.

-Online Scrabble, I love playing.

What's your win-defeat ratio on Scrabble?

-I'm up to 50 percent now.

-Oh!

-That is good.

-I'd like to think so. Getting better.

How many people do you play with online? Do you have a big Scrabble community?

-It's huge. 24 hours.

-Wow.

OK, well, there we are.

There remain six unanswered characters from US TV series.

-How are you feeling about this?

-Not very confident.

I've just got one.

OK, well, the high scorers are Samantha and Sarah on 118.

If you can score 74 or less, you're in the next round.

I'm going to say Jack Bauer,

I'm going to say 24.

OK. 74 your target, 24 your answer.

Let's see. Here comes your red line. If you get below this, you are through to Round Two.

How many people said 24 for Jack Bauer?

You've done it. Very well done. Still going down.

-45.

-APPLAUSE

88 is your total.

Well played, Jackie. You only needed to know one.

Played by Kiefer Sutherland.

It's been 192 episodes, which is, if you divide it by 8, it's 24.

-So there's been eight series.

-Eight series.

-24 each.

Now then, Donna,

welcome to the show. Great to have you here.

-Wooed by a window-fitter.

-Yes!

-Were you like putty in his hands?

-GROANING AND LAUGHTER

-Oh...

-I've been waiting all this time to say that.

-What do you do, Donna?

-I'm a nursery nurse for the NHS.

How long have you done that for?

14 years now.

-Still enjoying it?

-Oh, yes. I love my job.

-Great job.

-What do you do in your spare time?

-We like spending a lot of time outdoors. I read a lot.

-Spending time with friends, and going to the cinema.

-Very good.

-Do you watch a lot of American telly?

-Intermittently.

-The last round, I knew more.

-I knew the last board a lot better than this!

The two that I did know have gone.

But there is one that I definitely know because it's a favourite of mine.

I'm hoping Dr John Carter is from ER.

Dr John Carter, ER.

Samantha and Sarah really hoping that you wouldn't know anything.

It sounds, I'm afraid, like she does.

There is your red line. Below that red line, you stay.

Dr John Carter... Is it ER? How many people said it, if it is?

Absolutely right.

And through you go. Very well done.

-26.

-APPLAUSE

26 your score, 79 your total.

Dr John Carter, played by Noah Wyle. Finished in 2009.

Let's look at the rest of the board.

I know way too much about US TV, that's what I conclude from this round.

-How are you on these?

-Not very good.

-Do you want me to leave you be?

OK, Stan Marsh is from South Park. Would've scored you 9 points.

-George Costanza - do you know that?

-I should do.

-He's from Seinfeld.

-Ah...

-Played by Jason Alexander. That would've scored you 5.

Jack McFarland is from Will & Grace. Played by Sean Hayes. Would've scored you 8 points.

The best answer on the board

is the curly-haired blond one from Beverly Hills 90210.

Would've scored you 1 point. Very well done if you said that.

Thanks, Richard.

So our losing pair, with a high score of 118, it's Samantha and Sarah,

one of our two returning couples.

-That was tough, wasn't it?

-It couldn't have been any worse.

-Did you watch ER?

-No!

LAUGHTER

I don't even watch Casualty!

-If you're going to watch a hospital drama, you might as well keep it local.

-Yes!

Absolutely right.

-I'm so sorry we gave you a tough board.

-Not as sorry as me.

We have to say goodbye. Lovely to have you on both shows. I'm afraid it's the end of the road.

Samantha and Sarah, thanks so much for playing. Great contestants.

BOTH: Thank you. APPLAUSE

For the remaining three pairs, it's time for Round Two.

Sadly, at the end of this round, another pair will be leaving us.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two is...

UK Politics.

Decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second.

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

Let's find out what the question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

Long-Serving UK Prime Ministers. Richard.

We're looking for the name of any British Prime Minister, since the post was founded,

who served for more than five years.

So anyone who's been prime minister for more than five years.

It doesn't have to be concurrently. It can be two separate occasions.

Anyone who's held that post for more than five years.

-Very best of luck.

-Thanks very much indeed.

So, UK Prime Ministers who held the post for more than five years.

-How's politics for you, Alan?

-This is not too bad. Better than the last subject.

I think I'm going to go for...

Benjamin Disraeli.

Benjamin Disraeli, says Alan.

Let's see if that's right and let's see how many people said Benjamin Disraeli.

Absolutely right.

-Very well done indeed. 12, Alan!

-APPLAUSE

Very good indeed.

Well played, Alan. That puts pressure on the other teams.

He was prime minister in 1868 briefly and then from '74 to '80.

So just under seven years in total.

Now then, Julian, how are you feeling about this?

Not...too bad.

I think I'm going to go for

a little bit of a punt and say...

William Pitt the Younger.

Pitt the Younger, says Julian.

Let's see if that's right and if it is, how many people said William Pitt the Younger?

Absolutely right. Very well done, Julian.

Our low score is 12, from Alan.

Ooh, look at that! 5 for Pitt the Younger!

APPLAUSE

Another very good answer. He was prime minister for nearly 20 years.

He was 24 when he started out, just at the end of the 18th century and again at the start of the 19th.

-I'm surprised he scored lower than Disraeli.

-Pitt the Younger?

-Yes.

Well, it was 80-odd years earlier, so...

-Yes.

-Pitt the Younger was before a lot of people's time.

LAUGHTER Whereas Disraeli... You know?

It's good. Yep!

Now then, Mike,

you excelled in the last round. That was the warm-up for this round.

-UK Politics?

-Not great, I'm afraid. Pitt the Younger's a good answer.

Now that that's gone, I'm going to have to give a really bad answer.

I've got nothing. I'm going to have to say Tony Blair.

Tony Blair, says Mike. Let's see if it's right

and let's see how many people said Tony Blair.

It's right.

APPLAUSE

75, Mike. It's better than 100. Maybe there will be some 100s to come.

It may turn out to be a good answer, and a good tactical answer.

-Richard.

-Yes, Anthony Blair, or Tony Blair.

He was a Labour prime minister.

He was just the late part of the 20th century,

into the early part of the 21st century.

-He was prime minister for about 10 years.

-Thanks, Richard.

Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

5, our best score. William Pitt the Younger, Julian! Very well done.

12 - very good for Disraeli.

Then it's a hike - I'm sorry, Mike - up to 75 for Tony Blair.

Quite a lot of pressure on you, Sean, to find a low-scoring answer.

But we're only halfway through the round.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

We're looking for UK prime ministers who've served longer than five years.

Sean, you're going to try and find the lowest-scoring one you can.

-You are the high scorers on 75.

-Yes, I'll have to gamble a bit.

I'm going to go for my favourite prime minister,

Lord Palmerston.

-So many people's favourite.

-LAUGHTER

Lord Palmerston. Normally we'd have a red line.

No red line for you because you're way out in front.

Lord Palmerston. Is it right? How many people said it?

It's right. Very well done, Sean. Lord Palmerston.

5 has been our lowest score so far for William Pitt the Younger.

You've smashed through that! Look at that. 2!

2 for Lord Palmerston. A brilliant answer, taking your total up to 77.

Is that enough to keep you in the game? We'll have to wait and see.

Terrific answer. From the mid-19th century, Lord Palmerston.

Or Viscount Palmerston was his correct title.

Henry John Temple was his actual name, but known by all sorts of titles.

Thank you.

Now then, Jackie, you now have something to aim for.

The high scorers are Sean and Mike on 77. You're on 5.

71 or less keeps you firmly in the game.

-It's getting harder as we go along.

-It's really hard.

I don't want to let Julian down again.

I'm going to say Harold Wilson.

Harold Wilson, says Jackie.

Here comes your red line. Below that, you are through to the next round.

Let's see if Wilson is right and if it is, let's see how many people said it. Harold Wilson.

It's right.

And it sees you through. Very well done, Jackie.

Surprisingly low answer. 30 for Harold Wilson.

It takes your total to 35.

They're playing well again, Julian and Jackie. They look very strong.

He was prime minister twice in the '60s and '70s.

Thanks. Now then, Donna...

You're on 12. The high scorers remain Sean and Mike on 77.

If you can score 64 or less, you're through to the head-to-head.

-How do you feel about this?

-I did think of a couple,

it's whether or not they served for longer than five years.

But we'll try. I'm going to go with David Lloyd George.

Lloyd George, says Donna. David Lloyd George.

Here comes your red line. If you can get below that, you're through to the head-to-head.

How many people said David Lloyd George? Is it right?

Absolutely right.

And you're in the head-to-head. Very well done.

-8!

-APPLAUSE

20, your total, the best total score of the round.

That's a good round, all round. Lloyd George was the Liberal Prime Minister from 1916 to '22.

The only prime minister to have Welsh as his first language.

There's only three pointless answers here.

Very well done if you said any of these.

You could've had the Duke of Newcastle, who was around the middle of the 18th century.

You could've had Henry Pelham, who was just before him.

Or from the mid-19th century, the last Whig Prime Minister, Lord John Russell. Terrific answers.

There's a whole bunch on 1 point. Well done if you said Marquess of Salisbury,

Stanley Baldwin, Herbert Asquith, Robert Walpole, Viscount Melbourne, Sir Robert Peel,

the Earl of Liverpool and Ramsay MacDonald.

All of those scored 1 point.

Let's take a look at the top three. We've already heard one of them.

Churchill would've scored you 51.

Tony Blair scored 75 points.

-What do you think will be at the top?

-Margaret Thatcher.

Absolutely right. 80 points.

At the end of our second round, our losing pair,

with a high score of 77, is Sean and Mike.

Sean, valiant effort there.

Mike, it's always tough.

Have you thought of others that you might've said?

I might've taken a punt on Lord Liverpool, maybe.

-Was that any good?

-Lord Liverpool?

-Yes.

-Well, the Earl of Liverpool.

-OK.

-It would've scored you 1 point.

Ohh! What about that? You'd have been on 3.

Oh, well. Shocker!

You'll be back next time. This is good news.

-The jackpot might be £1,000 bigger, you never know.

-OK.

So there we are! We'll look forward to seeing you then.

-You played very well today.

-APPLAUSE

But the two remaining two pairs are one step closer to the final

and a chance to take home the jackpot, as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Alan and Donna, Julian and Jackie.

You are one round from the final and a chance to play for the jackpot,

which currently stands at £1,000.

APPLAUSE

To decide which pair it'll be, you're going to go head-to-head.

You are now allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for that jackpot.

-Julian and Jackie, we've been here before.

-BOTH: We have.

-But last time, it didn't go so well, did it?

-No.

-Alan and Donna, how are you feeling?

-Good.

-I'm a bit nervous round the edges!

You can be less nervous, I think! You can talk things through.

-If a window question comes up...

-Oh, you're going to see straight through that!

LAUGHTER AND GROANS

Let's play the head-to-head.

Here comes your first question. It concerns...

-Richard.

-I'm going to show you five pictures of piers from across the UK.

Tell us where they are, please. The most obscure answer wins the point.

OK, thanks very much.

Let's reveal our five piers. We have got...

There we are. Five piers. We just need you to name them.

Alan and Donna, you've played best throughout the show so far, so you get to go first.

THEY WHISPER

(I don't know any of them!)

-Shall we go for that one?

-What if they do?

I think we'll go for B, Weston-super-Mare.

B, Weston-super-Mare. Weston-super-Mare, say Alan and Donna.

Julian and Jackie, the rest of the board is yours.

-Talk us through it.

-Erm...!

I know C but I can't think where it is.

-The only one we know for sure, I think, is probably Blackpool.

-I think that's the only one we know.

-What do you think?

-I think Blackpool's going to be quite high.

-Yes.

-But we have to go with what we know.

Let's go for a right answer. Blackpool, D.

D, Blackpool, say Julian and Jackie.

Alan and Donna have said that B is Weston-super-Mare.

Let's see if B is Weston-super-Mare and how many people said it.

It is.

Ooh, it's a good answer.

-Wow! 4!

-APPLAUSE

Very well played, Alan and Donna. 4 for Weston-super-Mare.

Julian and Jackie have said that D is Blackpool.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said Blackpool for D.

It's absolutely right.

High score there, as I think you probably suspected it would be.

Very well done, Alan and Donna. After one question, you are up 1-0.

Let's go through the rest.

-"A" looks gorgeous, doesn't it?

-I love the look of that!

-Shall we go there?

-I think we should.

-Where would we have to go?

-That looks quite Scottish, that building there.

-Ahh, clever!

-It's Bangor in North Wales.

-Oh, right! So quite Scottish!

Would've scored you 1 point.

-We're all coming, Bangor.

-Shall we do a Pointless summer trip?

-Plan that now! Let's go to Bangor!

-Who's in?

-I'm in.

-I'm in.

-Definitely!

-Guys?

-We're in.

-Audience? THEY CHEER

-Viewers?

-Audience at home?

-It's hard to tell with the viewers, isn't it?

I always forget that. You can't see, can you?

I can see. I can see.

-Erm, C, there's a little clue there.

-There's a train.

-There's a little train.

-It's the longest pleasure pier in the world.

-Wow.

It's in Southend-on-Sea.

It would've scored you 13 points.

We've seen Blackpool already.

E is a pointless answer. You'll get it if you live there.

-It's in Lowestoft. Very well done if you said it.

-Wow.

-Bangor is our favourite.

-Bangor...

Bangor... Heaven! There we go.

Thanks very much indeed! Here comes our second question.

Julian and Jackie, we've been here before. You have to win this to stay in the game.

It concerns...

-Richard.

-We'll show you the names of five babies born in 2012 to celebrity parents.

We've put the initials of their mothers in brackets.

-We need you to tell us the mother's name.

-Thanks.

Let's reveal our five celebrity babies. Here they are...

I'll read those again.

There we are. Five celebrity babies, with their mother's initials in brackets.

We need the full names of their mothers.

Julian and Jackie, you go first this time.

This is so difficult!

-Oh, dear! Erm...

-My mind's gone blank!

-THEY LAUGH

-It has! I don't know.

-Go on, go for a blind stab.

-We haven't got a clue.

I'm going to say Theodora Rose Williams, Amy Fox.

Amy Fox.

Amy Fox, say Julian and Jackie for Theodora Rose Williams.

Alan and Donna, talk us through the board.

-Go on, talk us through the board!

-We would if we could!

I knew... Well, I think I know two.

Blue Ivy Carter, I think, belongs to Beyonce Knowles

and Eugene Pip Fox, I think, belongs to Billie Piper.

That's the one we'll go for.

Eugene Pip Fox, you're going to say. Eugene Pip Fox - Billie Piper.

We have Amy Fox and Billie Piper.

Amy Fox, say Julian and Jackie.

Let's see if it's right. Let's see how many people said it.

Bad luck. I'm sorry. I'm afraid Amy Fox is an incorrect answer,

which means, Alan and Donna, you merely have to be correct.

Eugene Pip Fox, Billie Piper. Is that right?

How many people said it if it is?

You've won the question.

Ooh, it's very good. 13! Very well done indeed.

But best of all, Alan and Donna, after only two questions

-you are through to the final 2-0.

-Good work, Donna.

There'll be some people at home who got all five.

It's a subject people know an awful lot about.

You're right about Beyonce Knowles. Blue Ivy Carter, Beyonce and Jay-Z's daughter.

21 points that would've scored you.

Theodora Rose Williams is Robbie Williams' daughter

with his wife, Ayda Field.

Well done if you said that. 2 points.

Aoife Belle Foden... You dated all of The Saturdays, didn't you, in your time?

-All bar one.

-All bar Una Healy,

who's married to Ben Foden, the rugby player. 4 points.

And Hollie Rose Hughes is the daughter of Amanda Holden.

That would've scored 5 points.

Thanks, Richard.

At the end of our head-to-head, our losing pair, I'm afraid,

Julian and Jackie. You've done so well. Until you get to the head-to-head...

You storm through, and then the wheels come off.

Will you please join us on our trip to Bangor?

-We will!

-Yes!

We are going to have a lovely time, the day we go to Bangor!

That has literally gone over the head of anybody under, say, 43!

LAUGHTER

True. Anyway, lovely having you on the show, Julian and Jackie.

You've done so well. I'm sorry we have to say goodbye to you now. Great contestants.

But for Alan and Donna, it's time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Alan and Donna.

You've fought off the competition and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot. The jackpot stands at £1,000.

You've done so well. Your first appearance, straight through to the final.

Oh, yes! Very good.

To win that money, all you have to do is find a pointless answer.

Do that and you leave with £1,000.

You have to choose a category. Here are your five options.

-Can we have another five?

-Yes!

-LAUGHTER

-OK.

-What do you think?

-Not Poets.

British Actors. I can't...

Not World Geography or Funky Music.

-I'm leaning towards British Actors.

-Really?

-Yes.

Boxing, maybe. It depends where they go back in boxing or whether it's a modern...

-What do you think?

-Michael Caine Films...

-It could be.

-British Actors?

-Yes. Are you sure? I'm happy with that, yes.

-OK.

-We're going to go for British Actors.

-British Actors.

Let's find out what the question is. We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many...

-Ray Winstone Films.

-We're looking for any feature film, made for cinema release,

for which Ray Winstone has received an acting credit, prior to November 2012.

No short films, TV films or documentaries. Voice performances do count.

Very good luck, guys.

OK. Thanks very much. You have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that jackpot is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

Your time starts now.

He's in an animated film. He did the voice to an animated film, didn't he?

Indiana Jones. The, er, last Indiana Jones.

I don't know the name.

What was the football one?

-I didn't know there was one.

-Oh!

-Was there?

-Yes.

-The one with Bruce Willis...

-I've no idea.

-Ray Winstone's a bit beyond me.

-Scum is all that's coming to me.

-Can we try and think of the animated film?

-I can't think of it.

He was a war legend of some description.

-A war legend?

-A Norseman. He was in that...

-He did the voice.

-I don't know. Erm...

10 seconds left.

THEY CONFER

-Scum.

-OK. That's the only one we've got.

OK, I'm afraid that's time up.

We were looking for Ray Winstone films. I need your three answers.

We think we've got two for definite,

-which is Scum.

-Scum.

-And Quadrophenia.

-Quadrophenia.

-But we can't think of a third.

-He did the voice on an animated film but I can't remember it.

Let's make one up for sheer entertainment value!

Go on, then. You entertain.

Make up the name of a Ray Winstone film!

Erm... I think he was in Sleeping Beauty.

LAUGHTER

-Definitely.

-OK.

-Sleeping Beauty...

-Mm.

LAUGHTER

OK. There we are. Of those three, which is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Scum.

-Scum, we'll put last.

Which is your least likely to be pointless?

It's a shot in the dark, but I think Sleeping Beauty might be the least likely.

-You never know!

-You do never know.

Sleeping Beauty we'll put first. Let's pop those up in that order.

We have got Sleeping Beauty, Quadrophenia and Scum.

We're looking for Ray Winstone films.

You thought Sleeping Beauty was your least likely shot.

Only one has to be pointless to win that jackpot of £1,000.

Let's see how many people said Sleeping Beauty. Is it right?

-Ooh!

-Shocking(!)

-Terrible! I was convinced!

-Unfortunately, an incorrect answer. Not a pointless answer.

£1,000 is riding on the next two answers.

£1,000 - not our biggest jackpot I'll say.

In fact, it's literally our smallest. Joint smallest.

What would you be doing with £1,000? What would you priorities be?

I think a journey to Bangor on our own would be nice.

-Yes.

-LAUGHTER

-We don't need everybody else with us.

-No, we're fine.

-Fair enough.

-£1,000 worth of ice cream.

Good! Well, only two more chances to win today's jackpot.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, Quadrophenia.

It has to be pointless.

Let's see, for £1,000, how many people said Quadrophenia.

Well, it's absolutely right. Your first answer, Sleeping Beauty, turned out to be incorrect.

Quadrophenia - very much in the right direction. Down it goes.

Going into single figures. Still going down.

Oh!

-3!

-APPLAUSE DROWNS OUT SPEECH

Really? I've never heard of it.

-3 for Quadrophenia.

-Fair effort.

-Absolutely. A great answer.

Let's hope Scum takes you all the way down to zero

and will win that £1,000 jackpot for you.

We are looking for Ray Winstone films. Your final answer was Scum.

You thought this was your most confident shot at the jackpot. It has to be right and pointless.

Let's find out how many people said Scum. Is it pointless?

Well, it's right. Sleeping Beauty, incorrect.

Your second answer took us all the way down to three.

Scum now taking us down to...

-Oh!

-APPLAUSE

-22 for Scum.

-Never mind.

You didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer.

I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £1,000, which rolls over.

You've been brilliant. Thank you for playing.

You do get to take home our Pointless trophy. Well done.

APPLAUSE

It's from a very long time ago, Scum, and yet it's the second-highest scoring of any of his films.

Only The Sweeney beat it. It would've scored 27 points.

I think the animation you might be thinking of was Beowulf.

-That's it.

-That scored 11 points.

-We still wouldn't have got pointless.

Let's take a look at the pointless answers.

Breaking And Entering, with Jude Law. An Anthony Minghella film.

Elfie Hopkins was from 2012. He was in that with Jaime Winstone.

Fanny And Elvis, with Jennifer Saunders, a pointless answer.

London Boulevard, with Keira Knightley and Colin Farrell.

Martha, Meet Frank, Daniel and Laurence. He played Reeves in Ripley's Game.

There's a few of these that are gettable.

The Ian Dury biopic, Sex & Drugs & Rock & Roll, he played Bill Dury in that.

The last two were voiceover works. The Chronicles Of Narnia, he plays Mr Beaver,

and he's Soldier Sam in The Magic Roundabout.

Tube Tales was also pointless. Well done if you said any of those.

-Thanks. Did you know any of those?

-I knew The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.

-London Boulevard.

-How useless were we, then, eh?

-Yes.

We have to say goodbye to you. It's been wonderful having you on.

Really top performance. Brilliant. Alan and Donna...

APPLAUSE

Which means our jackpot rolls onto the next show,

-when we will be playing for £2,000.

-APPLAUSE

-Join us next time to see if someone can win. Meanwhile, goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

-..and goodbye from me. Goodbye.

-APPLAUSE