Episode 8 Pointless

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed. Hello, I'm Alexander Armstrong, and welcome to Pointless,

the quiz show where the lowest scorers are the biggest winners.

Let's meet today's players.

Couple number one.

I'm Jo, I'm an artist from Melksham in Wiltshire

and this is my best friend Nici, from Mitcham in Surrey.

Our second couple.

I'm Ian, this is Mike. We met at university.

He's originally from Worcester and I'm from Swansea.

And our third couple.

I'm Jane, this is my husband Owen and we're from Lampeter.

And our fourth and final couple.

I'm Dave, from Middlesbrough.

This is Andy, he's from Darlington, and we're work colleagues.

Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen, these are our contestants.

APPLAUSE

We will find out more about all of you throughout the show

as it goes along. There's only one person left me to introduce.

He makes Mastermind look like multiple choice.

It's my pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya. Hi, everybody.

Hello.

Mastermind sort of is multiple choice.

It's a multiple choice of everything in the world.

-Yeah, that's a mini multiple, multiple choice.

-Yeah.

Forget that.

-How are you, well?

-I'm really well. Very well.

-Excellent.

This jackpot is coming along very nicely at the moment, isn't it?

That is really maturing.

Yes, we had a great show last time, didn't we?

We had a bunch of pointless answers. Very, very exciting jackpot.

They didn't win it. So, plenty of money there. Two returning pairs from that show.

We didn't see a huge amount of either of them, did we, so we expect

to see a little bit more today from Jane and Owen and Ian and Mike.

Andy and David, they've so got the look of Pointless winners,

haven't they?

You get two guys, usually northern, quite unassuming guys,

you think OK, yeah, you'd like to go for a pint with those guys.

And they absolutely sweep all before them.

-Don't you think?

-Yeah.

I might be wrong, you might be unbelievably thick. I don't know.

LAUGHTER

You might be. But that's not the impression you give off.

You give off a quiet, calm assurance, I would say.

Oh, I can't wait for that podium to give an answer.

It's going to be the... Aw!

The second we get onto you guys, I'm going to settle back like that,

just enjoy the answer as it comes.

-Oh, it's going to be great.

-Exciting. All our pointless questions have been asked to 100 people

before the show. Our contestants must find the obscure answers those 100 people didn't get.

Everyone's looking to find a pointless answer that none of our 100 people gave

and each time that happens, we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

As Richard says, nobody won the jackpot last time so we add

another £1,000 to that, so today's jackpot starts off at £11,250.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

Right, if everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, in this round I'll take an answer from each of you

but no conferring. Whichever pair has the highest score at the end of the round will be eliminated,

so try hard to make sure that isn't you.

OK, our first category today is...

..Film. Film.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first, who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, our first question concerns...

-Richard?

-On each pass we'll show you the names of seven films

which are all biopics of famous people, and the name of an actor.

You need to tell us who did that actor play in that biopic, please.

Give us a nice obscure answer, you'll score fewer points.

An incorrect answer will score you 100.

There's going to be 14 to have a go at at home. Very best of luck.

Thanks very much. So, we're looking for the famous people

that are the subjects of these biopics.

And on our first board we have got:

I'll read those all one last time.

Now then, Nici, welcome.

Welcome to Pointless. Lovely to have you here.

-You've come from Surrey.

-Yes.

What do you do, Nici?

I work for the company that maintain the M25.

-Tell them from me they're doing an excellent job?

-Oh, I will.

Thank you. Someone says that, that's so good of you.

Aw, that road is so well-maintained!

How are you on your biopics?

Erm...

Not good, looking at that board.

There are names I think I should know,

but I think the only one I can be sure of

is Nowhere Boy

and John Lennon.

John Lennon, Nowhere Boy, you are saying.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many people said John Lennon.

Absolutely right.

Five!

-Nici, that's amazing.

-APPLAUSE

That's a really good answer. Five for Nowhere Boy.

Well played, Nici, very good answer, very good start to the show.

Absolutely. Directed by Sam Taylor-Wood,

who is married to the star Aaron Johnson. Five points.

The word "the Beatles"

is not mentioned once during that whole film.

-Wow, there's a snub.

-Yeah.

Actually, the word "the" is mentioned,

but the word "Beatles" isn't.

-Now then, Mike.

-Yeah.

Tell us what happened last time.

Er, last time theatre came up and me and Ian both said beforehand

if theatre comes up, we haven't got a chance.

And I thought I did really well with William Shakespeare.

But I don't think it was... What, 81, was it?

And we ended up a combined score of 181.

Which is embarrassing, to say the least.

OK. Here we are on Film, though. What do you make of this board?

A Beautiful Mind is a great film, Russell Crowe, love the film.

But I can't remember his name in it. I can't pluck him from anywhere.

Leonardo DiCaprio is, like, my favourite actor,

so I should know his role in that film.

I'm going to have to take a punt

and say that Leonardo DiCaprio was himself, J Edgar, in J Edgar.

We'll need the full name of J Edgar...

-John Edgar.

-OK.

John Edgar, says Mike Y.

Let's see if that's right. If it is, let's see how many of our

100 people said John Edgar for Leonardo DiCaprio.

Bad luck.

Bad luck, an incorrect answer, I'm afraid,

which scores you the maximum of 100 points.

-Richard?

-Sorry, Mike, I'll give you the correct answer

at the end of the pass.

But you notice something about Mike on today's show?

-What?

-He has an errant Y on his name badge.

-Oh, yeah!

-Cos in the previous show,

there were two Mikes.

-So we had Mike M...

-And Mikey.

People are wondering where the Y comes from.

-Yeah, why the Y?

-Why the Y, Mikey?

Or Mike - why?

LAUGHTER

-I should have said that when he gave that answer.

-You should have.

Mike...

why?

LAUGHTER

I don't know.

OK, now then. Jane. What happened last time?

I did abysmally. Off in the first round.

Yeah. Well, no, you had a South American region, Patagonia,

-sadly it wasn't a country.

-No.

How much time do you spend watching biopics?

I have watched some,

I've seen one or two there,

but not that I can remember.

I only think I know one and I think I'll go for,

-if it's accepted, J Edgar Hoover.

-OK.

We've learnt something, Mike, This is good.

OK, well, you are going to go with

J Edgar Hoover for Leonardo DiCaprio.

Let's see if that's right

and, if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said J Edgar Hoover.

It's right.

44.

APPLAUSE

44 for J Edgar Hoover.

Well done, Jane, a biopic about the director of the FBI, J Edgar Hoover.

Remember, we are looking for the famous people who were the subjects of these biopics.

David. You're the last person to have this board.

Tell us a bit about yourself, David. Where are you from?

I'm from Middlesbrough.

-And what you do, David?

-I'm a store manager for a retail group.

And what do you like to get up to in your spare time?

I do a bit of home-brew.

Oh, do you?

-Yes.

-What things do you brew?

-Ciders and beers, passed down from generation to generation.

-Really?

What sort of volume do you make every...

Only about 40 pints at a time.

At a time? How many times? How many times a year?

About three times a year, really.

OK. Now, David,

the board, the gentleman.

Talk us through it.

No idea, really.

The first one, is that something about a mountain? I don't know.

A Man For All Seasons, I want to say Henry VIII,

but I don't think it was about Henry VIII.

I think it was about his Chancellor, I don't know.

Desert Fox - Monty?

But I'd need his full name.

I'm going to have to go for Henry VIII,

because I don't know the full name of Monty, unfortunately.

-OK, you're going to say Henry VIII for...

-A Man For All Seasons.

A Man For All Seasons. Henry VIII, you're going to say.

Let's see if that's right. If it is, let's see how many

knew that answer. Henry VIII.

Bad luck, David. Bad luck.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer which scores you

the maximum of 100 points. I'm sorry.

That is a tough board, actually, I have to say.

But David, you knew the answer to that one.

You said he played Henry VIII's Chancellor and he did.

He played Thomas More.

The film is a biopic about Thomas More and that would have

scored you nine points, would have been a terrific answer. Tough board.

PT 109 is about the early life of JFK.

That would have scored you 10 points.

The Desert Fox, he doesn't play Montgomery, quite the opposite.

He plays Erwin Rommel in that

and that would have scored you 35 points.

Beautiful Mind, we've all seen it, but who does he play?

He plays John Nash.

-2 points. And Frida is the artist...

-Frida Kahlo.

-Absolutely right.

Would have scored 3.

The best answer on the board is John Nash.

We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

5, what about that, Nici and Jo? 5.

Best score by a long chalk.

Then we go up to 44,

where we find Jane and Owen,

then it's all the way up

to 100 where we find Mike - why? -

and Ian

and David and Andy.

So, yes. Andy and Ian, it's going to

be between the pair of you, I'd say,

to see who stays with us and

who leaves at the end of the round. Best of luck.

We'll go back down the line. Second players, take your places at the podium.

OK, we've got seven more biopics

on the board and here they come.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time...

Remember, you are looking for the famous people

who are the subjects of these biopics and Andy, you're going to

try and find the one you think the fewest of our 100 people knew.

So, Andy, how do you and David know each other?

We're work colleagues.

We work for the same company, manage different stores.

Right you are. How often do you see each other in the working week?

-We speak every day.

-Yeah.

-Don't see each other.

Area meetings,

the occasional concert, gig we go to.

Do you? What sort of gigs do you go to?

-Bad ones.

-Bad ones.

Do you set out to go to bad ones?

Occasionally, yeah!

How do you find them?

We both come up with suggestions,

"Do you fancy going to see that?"

You look until you find something, "Oh, that looks terrible."

Last time we went to one, we actually left

after three minutes, laughing.

LAUGHTER

There we go. Now, then, Andy.

What do you make of this board?

There's one obvious one...

the Mel Gibson one, I can't think of.

I'm going to take a chance

and say that Amadeus

is Mozart.

You're going to say Mozart for Amadeus.

Mozart for Amadeus, says Andy.

You're the joint high-scorers at the moment on 100.

Let's see how many people said Mozart.

Absolutely right.

45.

APPLAUSE

Takes your total up to 145.

-Richard.

-Well played, Andy. Tom Hulce's

portrayal of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Very impressive.

Now then, Owen.

I've got great news for you.

The highest scorers are

Andy and David on 145. You're on 44.

Even if you score 100 points,

you are still through to the next round. Well done.

-No pressure.

-No, literally, no pressure.

But let's have an answer.

I think I'm going to say The Iron Lady, Meryl Streep,

and Margaret Thatcher.

The Iron Lady, Margaret Thatcher, says Owen.

Let's see if that's right. No red line for you,

you're already through. Let's see, is it right?

Margaret Thatcher. How many people said it?

It's right.

68.

APPLAUSE

Takes your total up to 112.

Well done, Owen. Redeemed yourself, there.

Yeah, Meryl Streep, again,

won an Oscar for her portrayal of Margaret Thatcher.

Very good indeed. Now, Ian,

we have a game on our hands, here.

The high scorers are Andy

and David on 145, you're on 100.

If you can score 44 or less,

you are through to the next round.

Now, Ian, what are your other areas, your strong suits?

Just sport, really. Football, tennis, rugby.

Anything to do with sport.

-Not biopics, though.

-Not biopics.

OK. What are you going to go for?

Braveheart I should know, but

the name is just not coming to me.

So I'm going to have to have a guess.

The Last Emperor, Julius Caesar.

OK, Julius Caesar, says Ian, for The Last Emperor.

Let's see if that's right.

If it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said

Julius Caesar. There's your red line.

If you get below it, you are through to the next round.

Is it right? How may people said it, if it is?

Bad luck, that's an incorrect answer.

Scores you the maximum of 100 points, taking your total

up to 200.

Sorry, Ian. I'll give you the correct answer at the end of the pass.

Last time we did a round on "bio-pics," I called them biopics

and I read a very interesting, learned paper about pronunciation,

some university, picking up on

the fact that you called it bio-pic and I called it biopic.

And you were right.

Which is why I'm calling them "bio-pics" now.

Ah! but it's a portmanteau word, isn't it, really?

Yeah, if you want.

LAUGHTER

OK. Jo, what do you do?

I'm an artist. A painter. I do glass painting.

-Yes, you do! You presented some glasses for us.

-I did, yes.

Which we've seen, some very fine glasses.

-They're very good, aren't they?

-Yes. With your face and mine.

-Nice.

You have been... I mean, you look great, but in

Jo's picture...

-I look even better.

-She's taken about seven years off you.

-Really?

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jo, great news for you. You're through to

the next round, whatever happens, even if you score 100 points,

partly thanks to Nici's excellent answer,

and partly thanks to Ian and Mike Y's execrable answers,

you are through to the next round. Now, then,

the board is yours. Can you fill in any of the blanks for us?

Braveheart's William Wallace.

But the only one I really am positive on is Shadowlands

and I believe that's CS Lewis.

You're going to say Shadowlands, CS Lewis.

Lovely low score, there, from Nici, of 5.

If you can replicate that,

then this will really be an excellent round for the pair of you.

Shadowlands, CS Lewis, says Jo.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many said it.

No red line, you're already through.

It's right.

12.

Very, very well done indeed.

Fantastic total of 17.

Extremely well played, Jo and Nici.

Well played. Best answers on both passes from your team.

Jo and Nici are good, aren't they?

-Yeah.

-We've got some good players here today.

Really, really tough first question, I think, that was.

Let's look through the ones we don't have here.

The Last Emperor, not Julius Caesar, it's Pu Yi.

Pu Yi is a very tough answer, though. Would have scored 1 point.

Braveheart, Jo, you're right, was William Wallace.

Would have scored you 28 points.

Immortal Beloved is Ludwig van Beethoven,

by Gary Oldman, would have scored 4 points.

And Shine, Geoffrey Rush plays

David Helfgott.

David Helfgott. 2 points.

Well done if he said that.

Pu Yi, Perhaps unsurprisingly,

the lowest answer on the board.

-Some tough answers there, aren't they?

-Very tough.

Both boards difficult. Very well done to anyone who survived that.

They'll be something easier next, I promise.

At the end of our first round, the pair who will be leaving

-the show, with their high score of 200 points...

-200?

You're in the 200 point, Ian and Mike Y.

-We are, we are.

-I'm so embarrassed.

It hasn't gone brilliantly, has it, that round?

I mean, they were tough,

to be fair. I thought you were going to do better.

I thought we'd do better, as well.

-All you need is to have heard of J Edgar Hoover.

-I know.

That was a shoo-in.

Oh, well. We have to say goodbye to you, Ian and Mike.

I'm afraid it's been too short.

Too short.

But thanks for playing. Great to have you on the show.

Ian and Mike.

APPLAUSE

But, for the remaining three pairs it's now time for Round Two.

Obviously, there's only going to be room for two pairs

in our head-to-head round, so one pair in front of me

will be leaving us, very sadly, at the end of this round.

I wonder who it's going to be. Jo and Nici, fantastic.

Oh, straight out of the traps, there. Brilliant low score. 17.

Very, very good indeed. Andy and David did pretty well, there.

Jane and Owen, you made it through.

You're in the second round, now. It's all looking very good indeed.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for Round Two is...

..Football.

Can you decide in your pairs who will go first, who will go second.

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, so our question concerns...

Richard.

Yeah, we're going to show you a picture, now,

of the 1982 England World Cup squad.

-We need you to identify any of the players in this picture, please.

-OK.

So we're now going to show you the image, and here it comes.

Feast your eyes.

There you go. The England 1982 World Cup squad.

That picture will remain up there for the duration of the round.

You each have to name a player pictured there.

So, Jo, how are you feeling about this?

What are your areas of expertise, Jo, apart from art?

-Films.

-Films.

-Chocolate cake.

-Oh.

Very good on that.

And football, not a hope,

cos I can mentally see my husband

sat at home going, "I know that one and I know that one.

"And I know that one."

And all I'm thinking is, "Mullet."

LAUGHTER

-Ray Clemence.

-Ray Clemence, says Jo.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is,

how many of our 100 people said it. Ray Clemence.

It's right.

17!

APPLAUSE

Very, very well done, Jo.

17 for Ray Clemence.

Very well played, Jo. There he is, Ray Clemence. One of the goalies.

Your husband will be punching the air

like a last-minute penalty's been scored. Very well played.

Jane, how are we feeling about this?

Not good! I can't stand football and I was only one in 1982,

so, not a great memory of it.

I'll have to say...

I'm not even sure it's right, Bobby Dalglish.

Bobby Dalglish.

OK, let's see if Bobby Dalglish is right.

If it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said it.

Bad luck, bad luck.

I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer, which scores you

the maximum of 100 points.

I'm sorry.

Last game, Owen made up Rajikistan,

this game you've made up Bobby Dalglish.

That's good, that's one-all, isn't it?

One-all, with the equalising goal scored by Bobby Dalglish.

LAUGHTER

Controversially not picked for the 1982 England World Cup squad.

There's a Kenny Dalglish, who's a Scotland player.

Well, we can see,

the round is young. Anything can happen.

Andy, we come to you.

How are you on football, Andy?

It's around about the time I was collecting football stickers.

Paul Mariner.

-Paul Mariner.

-Paul Mariner.

OK, Paul Mariner, says Andy.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many

of our 100 people said Paul Mariner.

It's right.

Oh, very well done, Andy. Single figures.

8 for Paul Mariner.

Very well done indeed.

Yeah, Paul Mariner, centre forward. Used to play for Ipswich Town.

-Very good answer, Andy.

-Thanks very much indeed.

We're halfway through the round.

Let's look at the scores as they stand. Andy and David.

Lovely low score there from Andy.

So you're looking pretty strong at this stage.

Up to 17, great score from you, Jo.

Jane and Owen, a little bit

exposed, there, I'd say.

Out on 100 points.

So, Owen, quite a burden

on your shoulders, I'd say.

But anything can happen in the next pass. You never know.

We'll come back down the line.

Second players, please take your places at the podium.

Remember, we are looking for the names of any members

of the England 1982 World Cup squad,

as pictured here.

And, David, as always, you're going to try and find the one you think

the fewest of our 100 people knew.

How are you feeling about this?

Are you good on football as well?

Were you collecting stickers around about now?

No.

I was watching Middlesbrough.

They didn't have an international footballer.

LAUGHTER

I'm going to go for Viv Anderson.

Viv Anderson, says David.

Viv Anderson. Here is your red line.

If you can score 91 or less, you're through to the head-to-head.

Viv Anderson.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

It's right and you're through.

Another great answer. Look at that!

4! Very well done.

CHEERING

Taking your total up to 12.

Well done, David.

Well played, David. Another very good answer on that last podium.

The great Viv Anderson, there he is.

The first black player to ever

represent England in a full international.

OK. Now then, Owen.

Quite a lot of pressure on you.

You are high scorers.

Yeah, unfortunately I'm not much of an England football fan,

being Welsh and being born in 1982, so...

..I think in the top left-hand corner

it's Tony Adams.

Tony Adams, says Owen. Let's see if that's right.

No red line for you, as you are the high scorers, but Tony Adams,

let's see how far down the board it can take you if it's right.

Oooh. No, bad luck.

I'm afraid an incorrect answer, which means you score

the maximum of 100 points,

taking your total up to 200.

Sorry, Owen, I can see what you mean,

but it's a bit before Tony Adams's time, 1982.

So, Nici. Great news.

-NICI:

-Phew!

You are through to the head-to-head.

Even if you score 100 points, you won't overtake

the high score of Owen and Jane. You're on 17.

So, there we are. Now, football.

You, I notice, stood back and let Jo go first.

-Is that because you're pretty good on this?

-No. I don't know football.

So, I'm going for a random name,

just cos I hope he was playing that early. Kevin Keegan.

Kevin Keegan, says Nici. No red line for you,

you're already through, but let's see if Kevin Keegan's right and how many said it if he is.

Absolutely right.

45.

APPLAUSE

45 takes your total up to 62.

-Very well done, Nici.

-Good work, Nici.

Could have gone a lot worse.

Yeah, there he is, in the middle of the front row,

playing for Southampton at the time.

Now, there's only one pointless answer up there.

I know some people at home, this would have been a write-off,

and other people at home will have tried to get all 22

and some of you will have succeeded.

Let's go through some of them.

The pointless answer up there on the top row, third from the right,

is the Aston Villa forward Peter Withe.

So well done if you said Peter Withe. That's the pointless answer.

Graham Rix would have scored you 2. There he is in the middle row.

The second along. You would have scored 3 points for Steve Foster,

the Brighton centre-back. There he is at the top row.

The one you thought was Tony Adams was Bryan Robson

in the top left, there. That would have scored 10 points.

And the three biggest scorers, well, Keegan, scored 45,

he's the biggest of all.

But Glenn Hoddle would have scored you 23.

There he is, on the top. And Peter Shilton.

There he is, Peter Shilton, would have scored you 31.

Very well done to anybody at home who got all 22 of those.

I'm sure some people did.

If you only got one or two of them, well done as well.

Let's move on to the new round.

LAUGHTER

Thanks, Richard. So, at the end of Round Two,

I'm afraid our losing pair, with their high score

of 200 points...

Listen, what a shame. It's a tough round, that one.

But you made it through to the

-second round, which is good.

-Yes.

I'm sorry, this time we have to say goodbye.

This really is goodbye. It's been great having you here.

-Owen and Jane, thanks so much for playing.

-Thank you.

APPLAUSE

But, for the two remaining pairs,

they're getting one step closer to the final and a chance of

taking home the jackpot, as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Jo and Nici, David and Andy,

you're now only one round away from the final and a chance to

play for that jackpot, which currently stands at...

AUDIENCE: Oooh!

Now, clearly, only one pair can play for that money,

so we have to decide which pair it's going to be.

To do that, we're now going to go head-to-head.

This time, you're allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be going through

to the final and playing for the jackpot.

As I always say in this round, anything can happen. Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here is your first question and it concerns...

Places In Scotland, Richard.

Quite simply, we'll show you five anagrams

of towns or cities in Scotland.

Can you unscramble them

and choose the most obscure. Good luck.

OK. Thank you very much, Richard.

Let's reveal our five Scottish anagrams and here they are.

We've got...

I'll read those all one last time...

Now then, Jo and Nici.

You've played best throughout the show so far, so you go first.

-JO WHISPERS:

-Kilmarnock.

-NICI:

-Glasgow.

THEY WHISPER INDISTINCTLY

-JO WHISPERS:

-I'd say Kilmarnock.

Glasgow's the only other one I recognise, so Kilmarnock.

We're going to go for Normal Kick being Kilmarnock.

Normal Kick, Kilmarnock, say Jo and Nici.

David and Andy. You can talk us through the board if you like, David and Andy.

Disappointed that Normal Kick went, because I used live there.

Second one's Glasgow.

Not sure of the second two.

The last one's Elgin.

-So it's got to be Elgin.

-You're going to go for Elgin.

OK, so Jo and Nici went for Kilmarnock,

Andy and David have gone for Elgin.

Kilmarnock, let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

32.

32 for Kilmarnock.

David and Andy have translated Nigel into Elgin.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, let's see how many people said Elgin.

It's right.

Oh, is it going to beat...

Oh, no, it's not. 35.

APPLAUSE

35 for Elgin, which means, after one question, Jo and Nici,

you are up one-nil. Well done. Richard.

Unlucky, gents. There's a couple of answers that would have won it for you.

Glasgow wouldn't. You were right that Slow Gag was Glasgow,

but that would have scored you 74.

Do you know any of the other two? Uncured Lamb?

It's near Glasgow. It's Cumbernauld.

That would have scored you 4. Now, Red Beans is a pointless answer.

Very well done if you got it.

Very well done if you're sitting there at this very moment. Bearsden.

-Also near Glasgow. Pointless answer.

-Very good.

Here comes your second question and it concerns:

Charles Dickens, Richard.

Yeah, we're about to show you five clues to facts about Charles Dickens.

Which is the most obscure of these?

OK, let's reveal our five clues to facts about Dickens

and here they come. We have got:

There we are. Five clues to facts about Dickens. I'll read them again.

There we are.

Five clues to facts about Dickens and, David and Andy, you go first.

-We're going to go for Little Dorrit.

-Little Dorrit, you're going to say.

The only female title character of a novel. Now then, Jo and Nici.

Talk us through the board, if you can.

The title of the novel adapted into a musical is Oliver.

-His pen-name for his literary sketches, I believe, is Boz.

-Is it?

He's buried in Westminster Abbey?

-The only one I know is Boz.

-Are you sure?

-I'm pretty confident.

-Shall we go for it then?

-Boz.

-Go on, then.

-His literary pen-name is Boz.

You're going to say Boz was his literary pen-name.

So we have Little Dorrit, we have Boz.

Andy and David, this is the one you have to win to stay in the game.

You said Little Dorrit as the only female title character of a novel.

Let's see if that's right and, if it is, how many people said Little Dorrit.

It's right.

It's right. How far down is it going to go? It's a good answer.

-Look at that. Down it goes to 18. Very well done.

-APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed. Is that going to keep you in the game, I wonder?

Jo and Nici have said Boz is his pen-name used for literary sketches.

Let's see if that's right and, if it's right,

is it going to be 18? Boz, how many people said it?

It is right.

18 to beat. Down it goes. Yes, you've done it.

Very well done indeed. 11 for Boz.

APPLAUSE

Very well done indeed, Jo and Nici.

After only two questions, you are through to the final, two-nil.

-Brilliant, Richard.

-Very well played. Well played, both teams, on both questions.

Boz, Charles Dickens' pen-name used for his literary sketches.

The title of the novel was Oliver Twist.

That would have scored you 45.

Place of worship in which he is buried, you're right,

it's Westminster Abbey. But it would have scored you 22.

-And the first novel first published serially from 1836?

-Pickwick Papers.

That would have scored you 5 points.

-The best answer on the board.

-Thank you very much indeed.

Our losing pair at the end of the head-to-head is David and Andy.

You did so well. You was robbed in many ways! Elgin, a cracking answer.

-You thought they'd won with Elgin.

-Definitely.

Little Dorrit, a brilliant answer. But in both cases

you were just pipped by the brilliance of Jo and Nici.

Anyway, set fair for a great game next time. See you then.

I'm sure you will do as well, if not better.

-In the meantime, thanks very much for playing. David and Andy.

-APPLAUSE

But for Jo and Nici, it's now time for our Pointless final.

APPLAUSE

Congratulations, Jo and Nici. You fought off the competition

and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our Pointless jackpot,

and at the end of today's show the jackpot stands at £11,250.

APPLAUSE

You have done so well. What would round it all off?

What would be the best category for this round?

-Flavours of fudge would be good.

-Wouldn't it?

-Seth MacFarlane cartoons.

-It could be.

They're usually quite specific on this last round.

-It's specific.

-OK, let's see what comes up. Best of luck. The rules are very simple.

To win the money, you have to find a pointless answer.

Do that and you will go home with that £11,250.

First you have to choose a category. Here are your five options.

You've got:

Film awards is the only one.

Yeah, we can only go for film awards.

I don't think there's anything else there. Hip-hop stars? No.

Oh, I'm down with that.

-Film awards.

-Film awards it is. OK.

Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name as many:

We're looking for the name of anybody who's been nominated

for the Academy award for Best Actress or Best Supporting Actress

all the way from the 2000 ceremony right through to the 2012 ceremony. Very best of luck.

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers

and all you need to win the jackpot of £11,250 is for just

one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your 60 seconds start now.

We got Marlee Matlin. We've got Glenda Jackson.

-Shirley MacLaine.

-Has Shirley MacLaine been since...2000?

-Is it since 2000?

-Yes.

-OK, so...

-Just cleaned your list off.

-Marlee Matlin, I think was Children Of A Lesser God.

-That's...

-I'm pretty sure that was...

-I don't know...

-..after then.

I can only think of really obvious ones, like....

I can't think of any of them!

-Helen Mirren?

-Yes.

-Meryl Streep. For The Queen.

-Doesn't matter what it's for.

-Whatever it was.

Helena Bonham Carter? Did she get a nomination for...?

Yeah, I suspect she did. Either Sweeney Todd or something.

-Remains Of The Day?

-The King's Speech?

Ten seconds left.

What are we going to go for? Marlee Matlin.

OK, Helena Bonham Carter.

And... Meryl Streep.

OK.

We're looking for Oscar-nominated actresses of the 21st century. I now need your three answers.

-Meryl Streep.

-Meryl Streep.

-Marlee Matlin.

-Marlee Matlin.

-Helena Bonham Carter.

-Helena Bonham Carter.

-And Helena Bonham Carter.

Of those three, which do you think is your best chance at a pointless?

-Marlee, because I've never heard of her.

-OK, Marlee Matlin, we'll put her last.

-Which is your least likely shot?

-Meryl Streep.

Meryl Streep we shall put first.

Let's pop those up on the board in that order.

And here they are, we have got:

We were looking for 21st-century Oscar-nominated actresses.

Your first answer, Meryl Streep, was your least confident shot at a pointless answer.

You only have to find one pointless to win the jackpot of £11,250.

Let's see, Meryl Streep. Is it right, how many people said it?

Absolutely right.

Meryl Streep kicking us off very well there. Down she goes.

Through the 40s, into the 30s, into the 20s, into the teens.

13.

APPLAUSE

Not bad, 13, for Meryl Streep.

Probably, I would have thought everyone's first choice

of Oscar-nominated actress.

I think that's quite reassuring for your later answers.

Only two more chances to win today's jackpot.

Now then, Jo, £11,250, getting quite close to

one of our biggest-ever jackpots, what would you do with that?

My son's told me I have to take him to Disneyland Paris.

-He's ordered it.

-OK.

-But I've promised myself a tattooed gun.

I just need to find a willing victim now.

-Have you done a course on tattooing?

-No.

-You learn as you go along.

Learn on your son.

There you are. He's a blank canvas.

-They tend to wiggle at that age.

-True, true.

-Nici?

-I would probably use it to replace my poor little squashed car.

-What happened to your car?

-Someone drove into it.

So I think it might be jinxed a bit.

-I might have to buy another even smaller car.

-OK, very best of luck.

We're looking for Oscar-nominated actresses of the 21st century.

Let's hope nobody said your next answer, Helena Bonham Carter.

If this is right and pointless, you will win the jackpot of £11,250.

Let's find out how many people said Helena Bonham Carter.

It's also right.

Now then, Meryl Streep took us down to 13.

Helena Bonham Carter is now going to take us down through the 20s,

into the teens, still going down into single figures. Down she goes.

Oh, four!

APPLAUSE

Four.

Oh, this is very good indeed. This is winning territory, I think.

On your second answer, you hit four. Everything is now resting on your last answer.

You only have one more chance to win today's jackpot.

We were looking for Oscar-nominated actresses of the 21st century.

Your third and final answer, Marlee Matlin,

you thought was your most confident shot at a pointless answer.

That's what it has to be for you to win the jackpot.

So, for £11,250, let's see how many people said Marlee Matlin.

Oh, no!

APPLAUSE

Oh, bad luck. That was all going absolutely in the right direction there

but unfortunately you didn't manage to find that crucial pointless answer.

You don't win today's jackpot of £11,250,

which rolls onto the next show now. You've been fantastic contestants.

You get to take home our Pointless trophy. Very well done.

APPLAUSE

Marlee Matlin, she did win an Oscar for Children Of A Lesser God,

but it was from 1987. That's a long time before we're looking.

Now, there's a lot of pointless answers here. A lot of famous names on this list.

I'm about to read out a whole series of names that are going to get you very annoyed, I'm very sorry.

Let's take a look at some of them.

Anne Hathaway was nominated in 2008.

Cate Blanchett, nominated four times during this period.

Imelda Staunton, nominated for Vera Drake.

Jessica Chastain was nominated for The Help.

Kathy Bates, nominated for About Schmidt in 2002.

Marion Cotillard won the Best Actress Oscar in 2007 for La Vie En Rose.

Michelle Williams, been nominated three times as well.

Penelope Cruz, who won for Vicky Cristina Barcelona, but nominated two other times as well.

Tilda Swinton, who won for Michael Clayton. There's a whole series of other names.

There's Amy Adams, Annette Bening, Carey Mulligan, Diane Keaton,

Frances McDormand,

Holly Hunter, Juliette Binoche, Kate Hudson, Maggie Gyllenhaal,

Marcia Gay Harden, Marisa Tomei,

Samantha Morton, Salma Hayek, Sissy Spacek.

All of those would have won you the money.

When you've got only one minute, it's very tough. But I expect some people at home did well.

We've given out some trophies, but we've also got some Pointless trophies of our own from Jo.

Do you want to see them? The glasses she made of us?

-Oh, look at that.

-How about those!

APPLAUSE

-It looks exactly like me. It's very impressive.

-It is very impressive.

I would trust you with a tattoo gun now. I wouldn't have done previously.

-Cool! Next week!

-When I say I would trust you, I mean hypothetically.

Purely. LAUGHTER

Unfortunately, Jo and Nici, we do have to say goodbye to you.

It's been brilliant having you on the show. An immaculate performance.

I'm sorry that it was so tough to hear all those names.

A tough final round all the same. Thanks so much for playing.

APPLAUSE

Jo and Nici didn't win our jackpot today, which means

it rolls over on to the next show when we will be playing for £12,250.

APPLAUSE

Join us then to see if someone can win it.

-Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd