Episode 9 Pointless

APPLAUSE

Thank you very much. I'm Alexander Armstrong and welcome to Pointless,

the quiz show that puts obscure knowledge to the test.

Let's meet today's players.

-Our first couple.

-My name's Andy.

I'm from South Shields, live in South Shields. This is Dave.

He's from Middlesbrough and we're both retail store managers.

-Our second couple.

-Hi, my name's Sam.

This is my wife Charlotte and we're from Llanbedr, South Wales.

-And our third couple.

-Hi, I'm Liz.

This is my daughter Steph and we're from Loughborough.

And our fourth and final couple.

Hello, my name's Elton and this is my little brother Tim,

and we're from Essex.

And these, ladies and gentlemen, are our contestants.

APPLAUSE

Thanks very much indeed, all of you.

We will find out more about you as we go through the show.

There's only one person left for me to introduce.

We're going to see the sights of obscurity and here is your tour guide.

It's my Pointless friend, it's Richard.

Hiya. Hello.

-Good afternoon.

-Good afternoon.

-Should be a good show today.

The jackpot is still ramping up, isn't it? Still rammed.

It's getting very big, and last show, we really, really nearly lost it,

cos there was a pointless answer, on Oscar nominees,

female Oscar nominees, and there were so many pointless answers there,

and unfortunately, Jo and Nicky, they didn't quite hit upon

the right ones, but I thought it was about to go, but it's still there.

Got one returning pair, that's Andy and David, who were very,

very strong last time, so if anyone's going to nick the money,

it could well be them.

Question one, it's a lovely question,

a question everyone's going to be able to have a little go at.

-Nice little question.

-I like that. Thanks very much.

All our questions on Pointless have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants need to find the obscure answers

those 100 people didn't get.

Everyone's looking to find a pointless answer that

none of our 100 people knew, and each time that happens,

we will add 250 quid to the jackpot.

Now, as Richard said, nobody won the jackpot last time,

so we add another £1,000 to that, so today's jackpot starts off at...

CHEERING

Right. If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

OK, in this round, I want an answer from each of you,

and there is no conferring.

The pair with the highest score at the end of the round

will be eliminated, so try and make sure that is not you.

Our category for round one is...

Birds. Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first

and who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, and the question concerns...

Richard.

Every year, the British Ornithologists' Union produces a list

which is all the bird species recorded in the UK.

We're looking for any of the birds on that list,

but Xander is about to show you six words.

We need any bird that's on that list that contains one of the following six words, please.

So anything on the official British list of 2012

made by the British Ornithologists' Union that contains one of the following six words.

-Very, very best of luck.

-OK, thank you.

As Richard mentioned, I'm going to put six words up

on the board and they will be there throughout the whole round,

and you have to name any bird that includes one of these words.

OK, here they are. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Six words. So, Andy, tell us what happened last time.

Charles Dickens happened last time. Charles Dickens.

You made it all the way through to the head-to-head

and then you were clobbered in the head-to-head.

-2-nil.

-2-nil.

-Andy, remind us what you do.

-Store manager.

And you and David work in the same job but in different stores.

-We do, about 13 miles apart?

-Yeah.

-OK. Now, Andy. Birds.

-The only thing I can think of is barn owl.

-Barn owl, says Andy.

Let's see if that's right, and if so, let's see how many of our 100 people said barn owl.

Absolutely right.

Ooh! 72.

-72.

-Yeah, very big score, isn't it, barn owl?

Much loved British bird with the heart-shaped face.

-That's a tough start. At least it's not 100.

-Yeah. There we are.

Charlotte, welcome. Welcome to Pointless.

-Tell us again where you're from.

-From Llanbedr in South Wales.

-What do you do, Charlotte?

-I work for a mental health charity.

-How did you meet Sammy?

-We met at university in a gig we were at.

He was sort of jumping around wildly and fell on me

and that was the first time we sort of said hello to each other.

-How are you on your birds?

-Not good.

I'm thinking of something,

but I don't know whether I've got it from the Brownies.

-I think I'm going to go tawny owl.

-Tawny owl, says Charlotte.

Let's see if tawny owl's on the list.

Let's see how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

It beats barn owl.

52.

APPLAUSE

All going in the right direction, Charlotte.

It's gone very owl heavy so far, this round, hasn't it?

The Tawny owl, they're the ones that do the "twit-twoo" which we associate with all owls.

-Ah, yes.

-Also known as a brown owl, the tawny owl.

-Hence the Brownies.

I've got it. Very good.

-OK, now then, Liz. Liz.

-Yes?

Welcome to Pointless, lovely to have you here. What do you do, Liz?

I organise a programme of classes for adults with learning disabilities.

Very good indeed. Whose idea was it to come on Pointless?

Guess.

-And you were the obvious choice to come.

-We think we're a good balance.

Very good. Which of the categories do you think you'll be covering?

-Probably food and literature.

-Excellent. Birds at all?

-Had you banked on that?

-I'm phobic to birds.

-Get out of here. You're phobic? Any particular birds?

-All of them.

Oh, no. Terrifying.

-So...

-What are you going to go for?

-I'm going to try a bullfinch.

-A bullfinch, says Liz, a bullfinch.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

Oh, down it goes, look.

There's 20.

APPLAUSE

An excellent answer, a bullfinch, for 20.

Well done, Liz, best answer yet.

Bullfinch, another very common bird in the British Isles.

-Half bird, half bull, which is what it got its name from.

-Terrible.

-Thank you very much, Richard. Now, then, Elton.

-Hello.

Elton, you're from Essex. Whereabouts in Essex are you from?

Buckhurst Hill, which is near Epping Forest.

FAINT CHEER

Wow, some fans in.

-A fan's in.

-It's not my mum.

-What do you do, Elton?

-I'm a car salesman.

Are you now? Excellent. How are you on your birds?

I was a Young Ornithologist many moons ago, yeah.

So this is a walk in the park for you.

There's got to be a pointless answer in there, Elton, surely. Surely.

Well, I'm hoping so, yeah.

-I'm going to go for cold tit.

-OK.

Let's see if that's right and if so, how many of our 100 people said cold tit.

It is right. Is it going to go down as low as Liz's excellent answer?

Ooh! Almost. 21.

APPLAUSE

21 for cold tit.

Another good answer. Well played.

One of the less colourful of the tits, the cold tit.

-Sort of brown and black.

-Thanks very much.

We're halfway through the round. Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

20 very much the best score in that pass.

Liz, thank you very much for that. Well done.

Liz and Steph looking pretty safe on that, I'd say, as are Elton

and Tim on 21.

Up to 52, where we find Charlotte and Sammy,

and then up to 72, Andy and David.

-You good on birds, David?

-No.

-Well, you've got a bit of time to learn.

Very best of luck. We're going to come back down the line now.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

-OK, Tim. So, what do you do, Tim?

-I'm a civil servant.

-I work for a bank.

-Civil servant working for a bank.

-Yeah.

I can't really say too much cos it's quite a secure,

James Bond-style bank.

Oh!

LAUGHTER

-Wow.

-Wow.

-I didn't know there was a James Bond-style bank.

I don't think we're supposed to know!

LAUGHTER

-Yeah.

-Wow. Erm...

Is there anything I can ask you about that?

You've presented me with a closed door now. I'm intrigued.

I want to know everything I can possibly know.

What are we allowed to know on this need-to-know basis?

-You can know where I work.

-Is it in the City? It's in Essex.

LAUGHTER

Really? There's a James Bond bank in Essex?

LAUGHTER

You're literally the worst spy in the world.

LAUGHTER

-How are you on birds?

-Uh... Not very good.

-OK.

Tim, what are you going to go for?

I would probably hazard a guess at blue tit.

Elton doesn't look thrilled with that.

Elton just looked at the sky then. OK, you're on 21.

That's a really good score.

The highest scorers are David and Andy on 72.

If you could actually score 50 or less with this,

you are straight into the next round.

That's what 50 looks like, that red line there.

Below that, you're through. Let's see. Blue tit, is it right? How many people said it?

Wow. 90.

APPLAUSE

90. That is a high score. That takes your total up to 111.

Wow.

That's the single most uncertain round of applause I've ever heard.

LAUGHTER

Cos it's right. Obviously a very common visitor to our gardens.

-Thank you very much indeed, Richard. Now then, Steph.

-Hello!

-Steph, hello. What do you do, Steph?

-I'm a university time tabler.

-Oh!

Oh, that's fun. Do you get lots of people bribing you

so they don't have 9:00 lectures?

Or to get home in time for Pointless.

-Very good. How are you on your birds?

-Worse than Mum.

She didn't do badly. Worse than Mum? Everyone's worse than Mum.

I'm really surprised!

Listen, you are almost through. You're on 20.

The high scorers are Tim and Elton on 111.

That means if you score 90 or less, essentially blue tit down...

LAUGHTER

-..you're through.

-I'm going to play safe then and go with snowy owl.

-Snowy owl. Liz doesn't think that's safe at all!

-Do you not?

She went just like this, she went...

That's what your red line looks like.

If you get below that with snowy owl,

you are through to the next round.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, let's see how many people said snowy owl.

It's right and you're through.

Very, very well done.

18, the best score so far.

APPLAUSE

-Well played, Steph and Liz. Lovely low total of 38.

-Well played, Steph.

Harry Potter's owl, Hedwig, is a snowy owl.

-What was your concern there?

-I thought it was Canadian.

-Ah.

So long as they're seen in Britain, they appear on the list.

Thank you very much, Richard. Now then, Sammy. Sammy, what do you do?

I'm a pastor in a church.

What does that involve?

It's very much like a vicar or a minister.

Writing sermons, studying for Bible studies, counselling people.

So you have your own church in your parish.

There's two of us with the same church, my boss

and I'm his assistant, so we've got a different kind of skill set,

so I often end up doing a lot of the administrative work, which is...

That's fun(!) Yeah, while he gets out and does all the glad-handing.

Well, I like that. How long have you done that for?

I've been doing it for about...18 months, I think,

and then a few years' training before that.

Right. Fascinating. That's great.

The highest scorers are Tim and Elton on 111.

You're on 52, which means if you can score 58 or less, you're through.

-How are your birds, Sammy?

-All my owls have gone.

I don't even know what one of those birds is.

I'm going to go for...

-a blue-breasted finch.

-A blue-breasted finch.

-Why not?

-Why not? Here comes your red line.

If you get below that red line with blue-breasted finch,

you're through to the next round.

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said blue-breasted finch.

Bad luck, Sammy!

I'm sorry, I'm afraid that's an incorrect answer which means

you score the maximum of 100 points.

-That takes your total up to 152. Sorry.

-Sorry, Sammy.

There is a bird called a blue-breasted finch,

it's another name for the blue waxbill, but not on this list.

OK. Now then, David, you've had a bit of time.

The high scorers, you were the high scorers,

but by no means are you still.

Sammy and Charlotte now have that honour, 152 their score.

You're on 72 so you want to be scoring 79 or less.

Erm...

-Great tit.

-OK.

Great tit, says David. There is your red line.

If you get below that red line, you're through to the next round.

Let's see if it's right, and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said great tit.

It's right.

And you're through. Very well done.

40. That'll do.

Takes your total up to 112.

Well played, David. Green and yellow with a black and white head as well.

Let's look at some of the pointless answers.

Some people really know their birds, so they would've done well on this.

I'll take you through a few of the pointless answers.

The eyebrowed thrush. Don't get many of them in the UK but there are some.

The hawk owl, the penduline tit.

-The rock thrush, the rustic bunting. That's nice, isn't it?

-Yeah!

The scarlet rosefinch.

Tengmalm's owl, the trumpeter finch, White's thrush,

-all of those pointless answers. Very well done if you said any of those.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

At the end of our first round, the pair who'll be leaving us with their high score of 152,

I'm sorry, Sammy and Charlotte, it's you.

But you were doing the right thing there, Sammy.

I didn't have another answer to give, really,

so tough luck, wasn't it?

There we are. We try and encourage people to go obscure

and you most certainly did that.

I'm afraid this is where we say goodbye to you.

We'll see you next time. We look forward to that.

Meantime, thanks very much for playing. Sammy and Charlotte.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's now time for round two.

Now sadly, at the end of this round, another pair will be leaving us.

I'm wondering which pair that's going to be.

Elton and Tim and Andy and David, not much between you.

Just one point in that last round.

Steph and Liz, lovely low score, a total of 38. How are you feeling?

-Fluke. It was a fluke.

-Really?

-Totally.

-Total fluke.

Everyone else was fluke-y that round.

None of us, apart from Elton, obviously, are ornithologists.

But you did very well. Lovely low score.

Keep that up, you should be sailing through to the final.

Best of luck to all three pairs. Our category for round two is...

Brainboxes. Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first,

who's going to go second?

And whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, so this question concerns...

Mensa members. Richard.

On each pass, we're going to give you clues to six people

who've been reported to be members of Mensa.

Obviously the more obscure your answer, the fewer points you'll score.

-There's 12 in all to have a go at at home. Very best of luck.

-OK.

Thanks very much, Richard. So we are looking for Mensa members described by these clues,

and here they are. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

So there you are. Six clues to famous members of Mensa.

Now then, David.

Erm, I'm going to go with a comedy genius, The Man With Two Brains.

-Steve Martin.

-The Man With Two Brains and The Jerk, Steve Martin.

Let's see if that's right and let's see how many people said Steve Martin.

It's right.

21.

APPLAUSE

Well played, David. Good answer. Steve Martin,

an actor now more recently just plays his banjo.

He does. That's the role he plays most often now.

He won a Grammy in 2010 for Best Bluegrass Album.

Yeah, he's an amazing banjo player.

-Now then, Liz.

-OK. Erm...

I know the women, so I think I'll go for Goldie Hawn, please,

playing Private Benjamin.

Goldie Hawn, the actress who played Private Benjamin.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said Goldie Hawn.

It's correct.

48.

APPLAUSE

-48 for Goldie Hawn.

-Well played.

That's quite a big score there for Goldie Hawn.

She won an Oscar at 24 for Cactus Flower, Goldie Hawn.

Mother of Kate Hudson.

She'd be a very good answer in women who won

Best Supporting Actress Oscars.

-Yes. Yes.

-Let me just check that's not coming up. No, it's fine.

We're fine.

Tim, we're looking for these famous Mensa members.

I'd probably hazard a guess at Desert Storm being

a World War Two officer, but the only one I know,

and I'm probably in competition with myself to try and beat 90,

Richard Whiteley's co-host on Countdown, Carol Vorderman.

Richard Whiteley's co-host, Carol Vorderman.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said Carol Vorderman.

It's right.

58. Not bad.

-Richard.

-As you say, it beats 90, doesn't it?

It's the biggest answer on that board.

Now one of the Loose Women, of course. Let's go through the rest.

-The author of the 1983 book Castaway, do you know that?

-No.

Lucy Irvine would've scored five points.

-The Army officer who commanded Operation Desert Storm?

-Er...

-Schwarzkopf.

-Yeah, Stormin' Norman Schwarzkopf. Three points.

That's the best answer on the board. And the Russian-born author? Erm...

Asimov, Yeah, Issac Asimov, absolutely right. Nine points.

Very well done to anyone who got all six of those.

Thank you, Richard. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at the scores as they stand.

21, very much the best score of that pass, David. Very well done.

David and Andy looking relatively strong.

Up to 48, where we find Liz and Steph.

Quite close to 58 are high scorers Tim and Elton.

So, yes, Elton and Steph, I would say it might be between you two.

But anything can happen on the next pass. Best of luck.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

OK, let's put six more clues on the board.

We are looking for Mensa members and here they are. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

There we are. Now remember, we are looking for these Mensa members.

Elton, you're going to try and find the one you think the fewest of our 100 people knew.

Erm... I know quite a few of them,

so the trick is to guess the one not many people had.

So I'm going to go for inventor of the C5, Clive Sinclair.

Clive Sinclair. Very well done. Now, you're the high scorers on 58.

There's no red line for you. You just have to hope this is a nice, low score.

Sir Clive Sinclair, says Elton. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

40.

APPLAUSE

Not bad at all, takes your total up to 98.

That's another pretty hefty score, isn't it, for Sir Clive Sinclair?

They did a drama-documentary thing about him

on BBC Four called Micro Men. Did you watch that?

-Yeah, I did watch that.

-He was played by...

Who's that, erm...

He was played by you, wasn't he?

LAUGHTER

-In sort of like a bald wig and ginger hair.

-Yeah, I looked like a clown.

LAUGHTER

Then you went into make-up and looked like Clive Sinclair.

Thanks very much, Richard. Now, Steph.

Steph, the high scorers are now Elton and Tim on 98.

You're on 48, which means if you can score 49 or less,

you're in the head-to-head.

I know two of them definitely and I'm pretty confident about a third,

and I think, considering the scores, I'm going to go for the third

and say...

Jamie Theakston presented Live And Kicking with Zoe Ball.

You're going to say Jamie Theakston. OK, here is your red line.

Below that red line, head-to-head.

Jamie Theakston. Let's see if it's right and how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

Yep, you've done it. Very well done.

Eight!

APPLAUSE

There you go. Well done. That's a great score.

Takes your total up to 56.

That's two rounds in a row you've had the best answer.

-Very well played. Now you and I both know Jamie very well.

-Yeah!

But a member of Mensa? Really, Jamie?

Really?

OK. Now then, Andy.

The high scorers are still Elton and Tim on 98.

You're on 21.

76 or less is what you need to score and you're back in the head-to-head.

-Talk us through the board, Andy.

-I only know two of them.

Pulp Fiction's Quentin Tarantino,

no idea about the Susan Sarandon film or the swimmer.

But I think who played Drago in Rocky IV was Dolph Lundgren.

-Dolph Lundgren.

-Dolph Lundgren.

-Dolph Lundgren.

Here comes your red line.

If you go below that red line, you're back in the head-to-head.

Dolph Lundgren. Is it right?

Will it get Andy and David into the head-to-head?

It's right. And yes it will. Very well done.

11.

APPLAUSE

11, taking your total up to 32, our lowest score of the round.

Very, very well done, Andy. Richard.

Another good answer. Born Hans Lundgren.

He's got a degree in chemistry from Washington State University.

-And now a member of Mensa.

-Yeah. How about that?

He sits on a table with Jamie Theakston.

Of course Mensa means table.

It's the nominative single of Mensa.

RICHARD SIGHS

LAUGHTER

Let's go through the rest of the board.

You're right, it's Quentin Tarantino for Pulp Fiction, would've also seen you through.

Would've scored 26 points.

The 100-metre breaststroke gold was won by Adrian Moorhouse.

Very well done if you said that. Three points. Very good answer.

An even better answer,

co-starred with Susan Sarandon in Thelma And Louise...

Erm...

-Geena Davis.

-Geena Davis, absolutely right.

That would've scored two points, so well done if you said that.

There we are. Thank you very much indeed, Richard.

At the end of round two, the pair with the highest score who'll

be leaving us, I'm afraid, Elton and Tim.

You didn't do badly there, though. It was just Carol Vorderman.

-Yeah, that was the only one I knew.

-Carol Vorderman.

Very, very high score for Carol Vorderman. It was hard to know.

Well, there we are. We'll see you again next time, Elton and Tim.

We'll look forward to that. Mean time, thanks very much for playing.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining pairs, they're one step closer to the final and the chance of taking home

that jackpot as we enter the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Steph and Liz, Andy and David.

You are now only one round away from the final and a chance

to play for that jackpot, which currently stands at...

Clearly, only one pair can play for that money.

To decide which pair it will be, you're now going to go head-to-head.

This time you're allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for the jackpot.

Let's play the head-to-head.

OK, here's your first question, and it concerns...

James Bond film posters. Richard.

We're about to show you five promotional film posters

but in foreign languages. We need you to tell us

the names of these films as they were released in Britain.

-Most obscure wins. Good luck.

-OK.

Let's reveal our five Bond posters in foreign languages.

I'm so looking forward to this, and here they are. We have got...

There we are, five Bond posters in foreign languages.

Steph and Liz, you've played best throughout the show,

so you get to go first.

(OK, A is Thunderball.)

WHISPERING

We're going to go for E, Dr No.

E, Dr No.

Dr No.

Andy and David, all those other posters are yours.

Talk us through them.

A, we think is Thunderball and B was...

Possibly From Russia With Love.

C, On Her Majesty's Secret Service and D, Moonraker.

We're going to go with B, From Russia With Love.

B, From Russia With Love.

B, From Russia With Love. So we have Steph and Liz say Dr No, E.

Is that right? If it is, how many people said it?

Absolutely right.

Oh, it's a great answer. Look at that. Ten!

Very, very well done indeed, Steph and Liz.

APPLAUSE

Andy and David have said B is From Russia With Love.

From Russia With Love. Let's see if that's right,

and if so, let's see how many people said From Russia With Love.

Bad luck, Andy and David. An incorrect answer, I'm afraid, which means, Steph and Liz,

after one question, you are up one-nil.

-Very well done. Richard.

-Well played, Liz.

-What were the clues there for you on that poster?

-Ursula Andress.

Ursula Andress, very good.

And guys, From Russia With Love is a Sean Connery Bond film.

-We knew it was wrong.

-It is Roger Moore.

This is actually the best answer up there.

Would've won you the points, but it's For Your Eyes Only.

Five points, that would've scored. In Toedlicher Mission.

-They're great posters, aren't they, some of those?

-Yeah.

-Amazing.

A is Thunderball. That would've scored you 48 points.

Now C I think both teams spotted.

It's the only George Lazenby Bond film,

so it's On Her Majesty's Secret Service.

Quite a low scorer. That would've only scored 20 points.

And D, not Moonraker, Moonraker was a Roger Moore film

and this is Diamonds Are Forever.

And that would've scored 58, the biggest scorer there.

-Very well done if you got all five of them.

-Thanks very much, Richard.

So here comes your second question.

Andy and David, you need to win this one to stay in the game.

It concerns...

Irish towns and cities. Richard.

We're going to show you five anagrams now of towns

or cities in the Republic of Ireland.

-Can you unscramble these and pick the most obscure?

-OK, thanks very much.

Let's reveal our five anagrams of towns and cities

in the Republic of Ireland, and here they are. We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

Now then, Andy and David, you go first this time.

THEY CONFER

Yeah, yeah. Go with Limerick.

-Um...the fourth one down, YAW LAG, Galway.

-Galway?

-Galway.

-OK, Andy and David say Galway for YAW LAG.

Steph and Liz?

The only other one we know is ROCK - Cork.

OK, so you're going to go for Cork. So we have Galway and Cork. Andy and David said Galway.

Let's see if that's right for YAW LAG, and if it is, let's see how many people said it.

It's right.

-47.

-APPLAUSE

47 for Galway. Steph and Liz have gone for Cork for ROCK. Let's see if that's right.

Let's see how many people said that.

Yeah, it's right. It's a high one...

-SCATTERED APPLAUSE

-..unsurprisingly.

Very well done, Andy and David. That's exactly what you needed to do.

-You're back in the game. It's 1-1. Richard.

-Yeah, the two biggest scorers up there,

Cork and Galway. YAW LAG, Galway backwards.

Now, the other three. RICE MILK, it's Limerick.

And that would have scored 23.

DREW FOX. Do you know DREW FOX?

-It's a county as well.

-Oh, it's Wexford!

-Wexford. Absolutely right.

It would have scored 29. And the best answer on the board

is ETHANOL. It would score you six points.

Very well done everyone at home who said Athlone.

-Ah!

-Athlone, six points.

Thank you very much indeed, Richard. OK, here comes your third question. This is the decider.

This will decide who goes through to that final and plays for that massive jackpot. Best of luck.

It concerns...

Michael Schumacher. Richard.

Five clues now to facts about Michael Schumacher.

The team that gives us the most obscure will be going through to that final.

Let's reveal our five clues. Here they are.

We have got...

I'll read those all one last time.

Now then, Steph and Liz,

you go first again this time.

I know four of them.

-It's just which one.

-Which one do you want to go for?

-I know his nationality...

-No, we don't want that.

-I know the record number of Drivers' Championships.

-I think that's a good one.

-Do you?

-Mm-hm.

-I know the team,

-and I know the name of his brother. Which one do you want me to go for?

-I think the record number.

We're going to go with the record number of Formula 1 World Drivers' Championships he won,

and it's seven.

Seven. Seven say Steph and Liz.

Now then. Andy and David,

the board is yours. Talk us through the board.

We think his nationality is German.

The team, we think, is Ferrari.

The former driver could be Ayrton Senna, it could be Alain Prost.

His brother's called Ralf.

We'll go with his brother, Ralf.

Ralf. OK,

so we have seven, the record number of Formula 1 World Drivers' Championships.

He won seven, say Steph and Liz.

Let's see if that's right, and if it is, let's see how many of our 100 people said seven.

It's right.

-16!

-APPLAUSE

Are you happy with 16?

-Mm...

-Ah.

-LAUGHTER

Andy and David have said Ralf. Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said Ralf.

It's right.

It has to beat 16.

Oh, 38!

APPLAUSE

Bad luck, Andy and David.

Well done, Steph and Liz. Very well done indeed.

After three questions, you are through to the final, 2-1.

-Richard.

-Sorry, gents. Very well played, Steph and Liz.

Now, the team with whom he won his first Formula 1 title would have scored 11 points.

But it wasn't Ferrari.

-It's... D'you know that one?

-Benetton?

Benetton. Absolutely right. It would have scored 11 points.

The nationality, he's German. That's a very big scorer -

86 points. And the former champion... It's not Prost, it's not Senna.

It's Juan Manuel Fangio,

and would have scored three points. Very well done to anyone who got all five of those.

Anyone who got all 15 of them, that's very impressive.

-Should join Mensa!

-They should.

Yeah. Thanks very much, Richard. So our losing pair at the end of the head-to-head...

I'm sorry, Andy and David. You gave them a really good run for their money there.

It's been great having you on the show. I'm sorry we have to say goodbye.

Andy and David, you've been great contestants. Thanks so much for playing.

APPLAUSE

But for Steph and Liz, it's now time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Steph and Liz, you've fought off

all the competition and you have won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our jackpot,

and at the end of today's show, the jackpot stands at £12,250.

You've done so well! You've done fantastically well.

The rules are very simple. To win the money, you have to find a pointless answer.

Do that and you'll go home with the money. First, you've got to choose a category. These are your options.

Good luck. They are...

-Nordic Playwrights is a no.

-No.

Tennis Stars is a no.

Honours is a no.

I think it's going to have to be Film Trilogies, unless you want to go with Funky Music.

-I haven't got a clue what Funky Music is.

-Neither do I!

It's all quite subjective, Funky Music, surely?

-It depends what your idea of funky is.

-I don't think we could trust ourselves with that.

-No.

-We're going to go with Film Trilogies, please.

-Film Trilogies,

say Steph and Liz. Let's find out what the question is. Here it comes.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds to name

as many actors in the Jurassic Park trilogy as they could.

-Richard.

-We're looking for any actor or actress who received an acting credit

at the end of any of the three theatrically released Jurassic Park movies.

Any uncredited cameos, such as that by Steven Spielberg, won't count.

So anyone who received a credit at the end of any of those three films. The very best of luck.

You now have up to one minute to come up with three answers.

All you need to win that £12,250

is for just one of those answers to be pointless.

-Are you ready?

-Yeah.

-OK. Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

There they are. Your time starts now.

-OK.

-There has to be Jeff Goldblum.

-Jeff Goldblum.

-Richard Attenborough.

-Yeah, but everybody will know them.

-Do you know anyone else?

-No.

-OK.

I think he might have to go!

Um... Oh, I love these films!

-Um...

-Can we do the dinosaur?

No, we can't say the dinosaur!

-Em, hang on. Let me...

-There's a little boy.

There was a little boy and I don't know what his name is.

And the blonde annoying girl. I don't know what her name is.

-Is Jodie thingy in it?

-Jodie who?

-Foster?

-Mm.

-No.

Um...Alan what's-his-name was in the main one.

-Rickman?

-No. Um...

My mind's gone totally blank. I'm trying to think of the third one.

Somebody like Adrien Brody?

We can try Adrien Brody, if you want to.

-Ten seconds left.

-It's a guess.

-It's a guess? Oh, I don't know actors at all.

-Come on.

-OK, we'll just go with those three.

-OK.

-OK, those are your answers?

-Yeah.

-Right.

OK. Well, there's time up. We were looking for actors in the Jurassic Park trilogy.

I now need your three answers.

Mum thinks that Adrien Brody was in it.

Adrien Brody.

-Richard Attenborough.

-Richard Attenborough.

-Jeff Goldblum.

-Jeff Goldblum.

OK, of those three, which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-THEY SIGH

-Jeff Goldblum.

-None of them!

Jeff Goldblum, we'll put him last. Which is your least likely to be pointless?

-Attenborough.

-Richard Attenborough, we'll put him first

-and Adrien Brody in the middle!

-It's a guess.

-You never know.

-It looks like him.

-OK, let's pop those up on the board in that order. We have got...

OK, so we were looking for the actors in the Jurassic Park trilogy,

any actor from any of those three films.

Richard Attenborough, you said, was your least confident shot at a pointless answer.

You only have to find one pointless answer to win that £12,250 jackpot.

Let's see how many people said Richard Attenborough.

It's right.

Down it goes, through the 70s, through the 60s,

into the 50s. Halfway.

Into the 30s, 20... 27. OK, 27.

APPLAUSE

Unfortunately not a pointless answer,

-but actually, quite surprisingly low.

-Yeah, very low.

I'd have thought he was probably the most famous actor from that trilogy. Anyway, who knows?

But still, we can be heartened by that. Only two more chances

to win today's jackpot.

Now then, that's a big jackpot, Liz.

£12,250.

What would be the first thing you'd like to do with that?

Well, jointly we've got a plan to go on holiday to Vegas,

and perhaps one of my children to get into one of the little chapels there

-and tie the knot.

-Not me.

-Not her.

-Not me!

-THEY LAUGH

OK, Steph, anything else you'd like to do?

Well, I quite fancy, on the way to Vegas, to stop off at Harry Potter Land!

-Yeah.

-That'd be pretty cool.

-Very good. The very best of luck.

We are looking for actors in the Jurassic Park trilogy. Let's hope nobody said your next answer,

Adrien Brody.

Of course, it has to be right as well, which it might be. Who knows?

This has to be pointless, obviously, to win that jackpot of £12,250,

so let's see, is Adrien Brody right, and if it is, how many people said it?

Bad luck. An incorrect answer, I'm afraid.

So only one more chance to win today's jackpot.

We're looking for actors in the Jurassic Park trilogy. Your final answer

was Jeff Goldblum. This one you thought was your best shot at a pointless answer. So let's see.

Jeff Goldblum. It has to be pointless for that jackpot to be won.

So, for £12,250, how many people said Jeff Goldblum?

Well, it's right.

Now, Richard Attenborough took us all the way down to 27.

How far down is Jeff Goldblum going to take us?

He's going down through the 30s and the 20s... Oh, 22!

APPLAUSE

-Never mind!

-Well, two good answers

in there, but unfortunately, you didn't manage to find that vital pointless answer,

so I'm afraid you don't win today's jackpot of £12,250,

which rolls over onto the next show. But you have been fantastic contestants,

and you get to take home our Pointless trophy, so very well done.

APPLAUSE

Unlucky. You played very well. There's not many big scorers there.

You've seen two of the biggest scorers. Sam Neill and Laura Dern also scored quite high.

Not pointless, though. People like Samuel L Jackson would have scored two points.

Vince Vaughn would have scored one point. Pete Postlethwaite and Julianne Moore both scored three.

Adrien Brody wasn't in it, but he was in King Kong, which might have been where the confusion was.

There are similarities to the two films. Let's take a look at some of the pointless answers.

Alessandro Nivola played Billy Brennan.

Ariana Richards played the granddaughter. You were talking about the grandkids.

Bob Peck, a famous British actor, was the gamekeeper in the first one.

The other grandkid was Joseph Mazzello, the grandson.

Martin Ferrero, Michael Jeter, both of those pointless answers.

Richard Schiff, perhaps better known as Toby Ziegler from The West Wing.

Tea Leoni, also a pointless answer. Very well done if you said that.

And Wayne Knight. You may not know the name, but you'd recognise him.

He's in Seinfeld, 3rd Rock From The Sun. Very well done if you said any of those at home.

And tough luck, you played very well.

There we are. Unfortunately we do have to say goodbye to you, Steph and Liz,

but it's been wonderful having you on the show. You've done so well. Thanks for playing. Steph and Liz!

APPLAUSE

So, Steph and Liz didn't win our jackpot today, which means it rolls over onto the next show

when we will be playing for £13,250.

-AUDIENCE:

-Whoo!

-Join us then to see if someone can win it. Meanwhile, it's goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

..and it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd