Episode 31 Pointless

APPLAUSE & CHEERING

Thank you very much indeed!

I'm Alexander Armstrong, welcome to Pointless,

the quiz that puts obscure knowledge to the test.

Let's meet today's players.

-Couple number one.

-My name's Roy and this is my friend Rob.

We've known each other for 20 years and we're here from Eastbourne.

-Couple number two.

-Hi, my name's Stewart, this is my partner Mel.

We're from Evesham in Worcestershire and we've known each other for about 11 years.

-Couple number three.

-I'm Nathan, this is Peter,

father and son from Gisborough.

And finally, couple number four.

Hi, my name's Sam, this is Todd, and we're friends from Watford.

These are today's contestants.

Thanks. We'll find out more about you throughout the show.

That leaves one person for me to introduce -

he's a man so clever, he can even talk himself out of a fight with Mike Tyson,

it's my Pointless friend,

-it's Richard.

-Hiya!

Hi, everybody!

I wouldn't try and talk myself out of a fight with Mike Tyson.

If he wants one, bring it on. LAUGHTER

Absolutely bring it on. Any time.

Now, Todd and Sam are back with us.

Todd and Sam are on the same podium. They were in the 200 Club last time.

-Yes.

-There's a lot of pressure on you today.

We've got Roy and Rob back, as well.

We were surprised they got knocked out last time.

They were very good in the first round.

One slightly dodgy answer in the second round,

one very good answer in the second round.

-But they're going to be hard to beat.

-I think they probably are.

Round One, no-one here's going to be too delighted with it,

but it's a question I get asked to do all the time.

-We're going to do it today?

-Yep.

-And no-one's going to like it?

-No.

-I'm looking forward to it a lot.

All our questions have been put to 100 people before the show.

Our contestants need to find the answers those 100 people didn't get.

Everyone is trying to find an answer that none of our 100 people gave.

Each time that happens, we add £250 to the jackpot.

Hayley and Anthony didn't win the jackpot so we add another £1,000 to that,

so today's jackpot starts off at £4,000.

If everyone's ready, let's play Pointless.

Now, in this first round, I want an answer from each of you but there is to be no conferring.

Whichever pair has the highest score will be heading home.

Our first category today is...

Can you decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

OK, let's find out what that question is.

We gave 100 people 100 seconds

to name as many Scottish Football Teams as they could.

-Scottish Football Teams. Richard?

-Lots of people north of the border sharpening their pencils.

We're looking for the name of any Scottish football team in any of the Scottish leagues,

from the Premier League to the Third Division,

any one in those professional leagues in the 2012/2013 season.

-Very best of luck.

-Thanks.

Now then, Rob and Roy, you all drew lots

and, once again, you are going first this time.

Rob, welcome back to the show.

-Hello.

-Great to have you here. You had a great time last time.

Two fantastic answers from you.

-And then Roy gave us California.

-LAUGHTER

Rob, remind us what you like to get up to down in Eastbourne.

I'm retired, so I play a bit of golf and do my garden when the weather stops.

I do a lot of reading.

-Now then, Scottish football...

-May I try Caledonian Thistle?

OK, Rob, you're saying Caledonian Thistle?

I'm going to need the full name from you, Rob.

I can't remember it. I know it has a name in front.

I'll have to say Berwick and Caledonian Thistle.

Berwick Caledonian Thistle, says Rob.

Berwick Caledonian Thistle. Is that right? How many said it?

Bad luck, Rob! I'm sorry.

Berwick Caledonian Thistle is an incorrect answer.

That scores you 100 points.

Sorry, Rob. I'll give correct answers at the end of the pass.

-Mel, welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

Great to have you here. What do you do?

-I'm a secondary school teacher.

-What do you teach?

-Languages.

-Which ones?

-French, German and a little bit of Spanish.

-That's a good spread there!

Now then, Scottish football...

Unfortunately, my job doesn't involve me travelling to Scotland,

so this is a bit of a difficult one for me. Erm...

I think I'm going to go for Dundee United.

Dundee United, says Mel.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

Absolutely right.

-23, Mel.

-APPLAUSE

23 for Dundee United.

Good answer. Well played.

Their biggest ever attendance was 28,000, when they played against Barcelona.

-Now then, Pete, welcome to Pointless.

-Thank you.

-Pete, Nathan said that you're a father-son team.

-We are.

-Were you three when you had Nathan?!

-No, I wasn't three!

-Anyway, Pete, what do you do?

-I work for the local council.

-Very good. Which department?

-I work in human resources.

-Right you are.

-What do you get up to in your spare time?

-I used to play football and cricket,

-but now, as I'm not so young, I've taken up golf.

-Excellent.

Now, I have a feeling, you're from near Middlesbrough, from Gisborough,

geographically, you're a bit closer to Scotland

so maybe you have more of an interest in Scottish football.

I do... Well, I follow English teams more,

-but I have an idea of a few Scottish teams.

-Very good.

I was thinking of lower divisions. I would say Stenhousemuir.

Stenhousemuir, says Pete.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it. Good answer.

It is right.

Well, 23 has been our lowest score so far.

Let's see how far Stenhousemuir goes.

1! Brilliant answer, Pete!

-Very well done indeed!

-APPLAUSE

Disappointing it didn't go all the way down, but that's a fabulous low score.

Terrific answer. Very well played.

They're in the Scottish Second Division in that season.

-Good stuff. Now then, Todd...

-Hello.

-Welcome back.

-Thanks.

-Round One last time.

-Abysmal.

-This cannot happen again.

-No.

-And it's not going to.

-You and your knowledge of Scottish football, what are you going for?

-I can think of a couple.

I've got one in my head. I'm toying with it,

but I'll go with it anyway. I believe Alloa is a Scottish team.

Alloa, says Todd. Let's see if Alloa's right

and how many people said Alloa.

It's right.

It's right. 1 is our best score so far, and that was Pete.

-5 for Alloa.

-APPLAUSE

Well played, Todd. Another Scottish Second Division team there.

They're nicknamed The Wasps.

They have a habit of ruining people's picnics.

Thanks very much! Let's take a look at those scores.

Pete and Nathan looking particularly strong on the back of Pete's excellent answer.

Lovely low score.

Then up to 5, where we find Todd and Sam.

Up to 23, where we find Mel and Stewart.

Then up to 100, I'm so sorry, Rob and Roy.

I have a feeling that would've been a great answer if you'd had the last component.

Who knows what might happen. Roy, if we have a low score from you,

it might be enough to keep you in the game. Let's hope so.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

Remember, we are looking for teams in the Scottish Football Leagues.

Sam, we need a nice low score from you.

-Welcome back to Pointless.

-Hi.

-Remind us what you do.

-I'm a midwife.

-Absolutely right.

When you're not midwifing, what do you like to get up to?

I'm into Arts & Crafts.

I like cross-stitching, I knit quite a lot.

Good stuff. Now then,

our high scorers are Rob and Roy on 100, you're on 5, so 94 will see you through.

-What are you going to go for?

-I'll go with one that I'm hoping is right,

and if it's right it should hopefully be low enough,

and I apologise to Todd if it's not,

I'm going to say Celtic.

Celtic, says Sam. There's your red line. It's nice and high.

Let's see if Celtic gets you below that red line.

It does.

Only just! But that's all it needed to do. Very well done.

85 that scores you. Takes your total up to 90.

It's all you needed to do because of that 100 points on podium one.

But Celtic, I can confirm, are a Scottish football team.

I thought they were!

Now, Nathan, welcome to Pointless. Great to have you here.

-What do you do, Nathan?

-I am a college student and I'm studying French, Spanish and English.

-Wow. Mel can help you out there!

-The languages troop!

-Very good.

-Nathan, what are your hobbies?

-I love football,

so this is a great question for me.

Are you going to be able to beat your dad's score of 1?

I'll give it a go. He won't let me live it down if I don't beat him.

It'll be tough. I'll try.

-Whose idea was it to come on this show?

-It was definitely mine. I coaxed him into it!

-So, Pete was the obvious choice?

-He was.

-He's smarter than Mam.

-LAUGHTER

-He's not really! I'm joking!

-Move out now.

She'll kick me out, don't worry.

Nathan, what are you going to go for?

I am going to take inspiration from my father's name

and I'm going to go for Peterhead.

-Peterhead.

-They're a Scottish Third Division team.

Sam's nodding!

-Sounds good!

-It does sound very good!

OK, there's your red line. If you get below that, you're through to the next round.

Let's see how far down the column Peterhead takes us. Will it beat Pete's score of 1?

It's right and you're through.

Let's see where it ends up. Peterhead. It's a great answer.

Oh! You equal Pete's low score of 1!

Your total is 2. Very well done, Nathan. Great score.

That's Stenhousemuir 1 - Peterhead 1. LAUGHTER

-Score draw.

-I could do that. Yes, Third Division Scottish team.

Only joined the Scottish League in 2000. Been around since 1890.

Now then, Stewart, welcome to the show.

What do you do, Stewart, in Evesham?

I work in Worcester as a personal tutor

to further education students, so 16 to 23 year olds.

And what do you tutor them in?

Mainly trying to help them get through their qualification,

doing what's necessary,

but I teach personal, social and health to them, as well.

OK. Very good. What do you do in your spare time?

In my younger days, I used to be a footballer,

and later on, a gymnast,

which the two don't really combine well with each other

-but I managed to do those.

-Wow. Footballer and gymnast?

-Could you pull some fancy tricks on the field, then?

-I used to.

Very good. At what sort of level did you do the gymnastics?

I got up to national level.

Very good. Good stuff. What fun.

So, then, 23 is your score.

The high score, Roy and Rob on 100.

We need a score of 76 or less from you.

Football's a good category for me,

but Scotland, erm, not as good as English clubs,

but I will go with St Mirren.

St Mirren. Just to clarify, he means his knowledge of it is not as good as English clubs.

It's not any kind of slur on Scottish football!

There is your red line. If you get below that, you're through to the next round.

Let's see how many people said St Mirren.

Very well done. You are through.

-11. Good answer.

-APPLAUSE

34 your total.

One of the founder members of the Scottish League, from Paisley.

They had a famous cup win in the 2012/2013 season.

-Roy...

-Yes.

-Roy.

Roy! It's with such a heavy heart that I say this...

-You are the high scorers, even before you give your answer.

-I know.

But if there's a consolation, last time it was your high score that saw you off,

-this time it's Rob's, so there's a symmetry.

-Something like that.

Neither of you need to feel any bristle

when the conversation turns to Pointless.

You can jointly shoulder the burden.

How's your knowledge of the Scottish leagues?

Not great, I have to say. It's not a thing I follow.

I have a friend who supports Hearts, but I'm not going to give that as an answer.

-You just have, I think.

-No, no.

The luxury of being the last person is that you can talk freely.

I shall go for, and I think they're still in the Scottish divisions, Cowdenbeath.

Cowdenbeath. Great answer.

Let's see how many people said Cowdenbeath.

No red line for you as you're already the high scorers.

It's right.

-Come on.

-I have a feeling this is going to be a lovely low score.

Oh! Look at that, Roy! Beautifully low.

-APPLAUSE

-2 for Cowdenbeath.

It takes your total to 102.

It's a lovely way to leave the show, Roy.

Scottish First Division side in the 2012/2013 season. Sometimes called the Blue Brazil

because one spectator shouted it out in the '90s and it stuck.

Rob, just to clear up your answer, the Caledonian Thistle one,

there was a club called Caledonian Thistle,

they changed their name to Inverness Caledonian Thistle.

I had to accept Inverness Caledonian Thistle,

-given that everyone else was going to have to give an answer.

-Thank you.

Those two 1-point answers and the 2-point answer of Cowdenbeath are particularly good

because there's only two pointless answers.

Well done to anybody who said...

..Elgin City or Albion Rovers. Well done if you said those at home.

I won't go through every team. I'll give you some lower ones because some people will wonder.

East Stirling and Annan Athletic would've scored you 1.

Dumbarton, Montrose, Livingstone and Stranraer all would've scored 2.

3 points for Ross County. 4 points for Queen's Park, Hamilton and Airdrie United.

Falkirk, Dunfermline and Clyde would've scored 5,

as would Alloa, we already know.

Raith Rovers, Brechin, Morton and Ayr United would've scored you 6.

Well done if you said any of those.

Let's take a look at the ones that most of our 100 people said when we asked them.

Aberdeen with 41,

Rangers with 80

and Celtic on 85.

Thank you very much indeed.

At the end of our first round, the pair we'll be sending home...

-HE SIGHS

-..Roy and Rob!

And also, our third-best score of the whole round was yours, Roy.

Lovely low score there with Cowdenbeath.

I'm devastated. I'm lost for words.

I thought you were going through to the final!

We've had some great performances from you in both shows,

but I'm afraid we have to say goodbye.

You've been wonderful contestants. Thank you for playing.

-Roy and Rob!

-BOTH: Thank you. APPLAUSE

But for the remaining three pairs, it's time for Round Two.

Now, there's only going to be room for two pairs in our head-to-head,

so one of the pairs in front of me will be leaving at the end of this round.

Best of luck to all three pairs.

Our category for Round Two is...

Fictional Characters.

Can you all decide in your pairs who's going to go first and second?

Whoever's going first, please step up to the podium.

The question concerns...

-Fictional addresses. Richard?

-It's a nice one, this.

We'll give you six addresses from film, TV and literature,

and the initials of somebody who lived there.

Can you tell us the character who lived at that address?

There's going to be 12 in all to have a go at. Best of luck.

We're looking for the names of the initialled characters.

Here's our first board.

I'll read those one last time.

There we are. Six fictional addresses,

six fictional characters to be found.

-Mel.

-OK. I know two of them for definite,

so as a fan of Coronation Street

I'm going to go for Hilda Ogden.

Hilda Ogden, says Mel.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Hilda Ogden.

It's right.

-26.

-APPLAUSE

26 for Hilda Ogden.

She lived there with Stan. Famous for the three flying ducks on the wall.

There we go.

-Pete...

-Hi.

You just knocked it out the park with the last round.

Is it going to be a similar job here?

I think I know two, one I'm more certain of than the other,

it's whether to play it safe or go for one I'm not so sure of.

I would say Danemead, St Mary Mead

Jean Marple.

Jean Marple, says Pete. Jean Marple.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said Jean Marple.

Oh, no! Bad luck, Pete.

That's an incorrect answer. It scores you the maximum of 100 points. I'm sorry.

Sorry, Pete. I'll give the answers at the end of the pass.

OK. Todd...

-Yes.

-Todd, you're the last person to have this board.

Do you want to talk us through it?

I think Conch Street, Bikini Bottom,

I believe he lives in a pineapple under the sea, and that's SpongeBob SquarePants.

Privet Drive is obviously Harry Potter.

I think I'm going to go with SpongeBob SquarePants.

OK. SpongeBob SquarePants, says Todd.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said that.

It's right.

-20!

-APPLAUSE

Best answer of the round so far, Todd.

That's what I would've gone for.

He lives in a two-storey pineapple under the sea.

Let's look at the rest. It's not Jean Marple, I'm afraid.

It's not Joan Marple, which I thought because Joan Hickson played her. It's Jane Marple.

I'm so sorry.

Would've scored you 7 points. Would've been a terrific answer.

Todd, you're right about Privet Drive. That was Harry Potter.

Would've scored you 36.

Let's do the bottom one first. That's the literary one.

-Do you know that one? Leopold Bloom from Ulysses.

-Oh, yes.

Would've scored 1 point. The one at the top is a good answer.

Can you get that one? What "G" lives at that address?

Anyone in the audience get that?

VARIOUS: Gromit.

-Oh, it's Gromit! Of course it is!

-CONTESTANTS GROAN

-Would've scored 7 points. Good answer, isn't it?

-Great.

Very good. Thanks. We're halfway through the round.

Let's take a look at those scores.

20 is the best score of that pass. Todd and Sam looking pretty strong.

Then up to 26, where we find Mel and Stewart.

And then Pete and Nathan, I'm sorry, up there on 100.

Nathan, that might not be the last 100 score of the round.

Let's have a low score from you and maybe that'll be enough to see you into the head-to-head.

Can the second players please take their places at the podium?

We're going to put six more addresses on the board.

Here they are. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

We are looking for the names of the initialled characters who live at these addresses.

Sam, let's have a nice low score from you.

I know two for sure and there's another one I'm fairly sure on.

I think I'm going to play it safe because I'm a bit of a chicken.

I'm going to go for 742 Evergreen Terrace, Homer Simpson.

Homer Simpson, for Springfield.

There is your red line. If you get below that, you are in the head-to-head.

Homer Simpson. How many of our 100 said it?

It's right. And you're through. Well done.

-It's quite low.

-Wow. 46.

-APPLAUSE

Surprisingly low. 66 your total.

Springfield was chosen because there's so many towns and cities in the USA called Springfield.

There's 34, at least. But Matt Groening said in the end it was based on Springfield, Oregon.

-There we are. Now, Nathan...

-Yes.

Nathan, what we definitely need from you is a low score.

-We do.

-Whether or not it'll be enough to save you, I don't know.

I need a low score, but the only one I know

I'm pretty certain won't be low enough,

because the only one I know for certain is 221B Baker Street,

-London, UK.

-HE SIGHS

I can't even think of names for the other four.

I'll just have to say the one I know.

221B Baker Street, London, UK, Sherlock Holmes.

Sherlock Holmes, says Nathan. No red line for you.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Sherlock Holmes.

92. That's a punishingly high score.

92 takes your total up to 192.

The good news for you, though, is,

you drew 1-1 in the first round and you've just beat your dad in this round!

I suspect that your mum would've beaten both of you.

-I should've brought her on instead!

-Thanks very much!

Now then, Stewart, good news, you're through to the head-to-head.

Less good news, I'm going to ask you to take us through the board.

That's not going to take very long, unfortunately.

There's only one I'm possibly going to know,

and that's 32 Windsor Gardens, Notting Hill, London,

Paddington Bear.

You're going to say Paddington Bear.

Let's see if that's right. No red line for you.

Let's see how many of our 100 people said Paddington Bear.

It's right.

It's a brilliant answer!

6 for Paddington Bear! Best score of the round by quite a long chalk.

-Takes your total up to 32.

-That's a lovely answer.

-Isn't it?

There is a real Windsor Gardens in London but there isn't a number 32.

It runs out before 32.

Let's have a look at the rest. Do you know the apartment one?

-That is Frasier Crane.

-Yep. 7 points that would've scored.

I'll go down the bottom next. Any idea on that one?

-No idea.

-She's a vampire slayer.

-Oh, it's Buffy!

The first name is easy. It's Buffy. What's the surname?

-Summers.

-Buffy Summers, yes. Would've scored 5 points.

This last one is a pointless answer.

That is Mr Darcy.

It's not Frederick. It's not...

-It's a... It's a funny one.

-Yep.

Very well done to anyone at home, you'd have added £250 to the jackpot if you said...

-I've remembered. Fitzwilliam Darcy.

-Fitzwilliam Darcy, yes.

APPLAUSE

It's not often you get a round of applause, is it?

Oh, is that for me?

Oh, there you go! Thank you. I should've wallowed a bit more!

I thought that was... Thank you. Thank you very much.

I'm doing my wallowing now. Thanks very much indeed, Richard.

At the end of our second round,

I'm afraid it's Nathan and Pete we have to say goodbye to.

After that fantastic first round, as well,

with just a low score of 2. 192 this time.

However, I have absolutely no doubt

you'll come back next time and do fantastically well.

-We'll look forward to that. Thanks for playing. Great contestants.

-Thanks.

APPLAUSE

But for the remaining pairs, it's time for the head-to-head.

Congratulations, Stewart and Mel, Todd and Sam,

you are one step closer to the chance to play for our jackpot,

which currently stands at £4,000.

We have to decide which pair goes through to the final.

To do that you're going to go head-to-head,

the difference being, you are allowed to confer.

The first pair to win two questions will be playing for the jackpot.

It promises to be an exciting head-to-head. Let's play it.

OK, here comes your first question. It concerns...

Country Music Stars. Richard?

We'll show you five images of famous country music performers.

Can you identify the most obscure?

Let's reveal our country music stars. We have got...

Five country music stars.

Stewart and Mel, you've played best throughout, so you get to go first.

-Which one do you reckon? Do you know any of them?

-Erm...

-(I think D's Kenny Rogers.)

-D?

-Yes.

OK, I'm not entirely sure, but I think D is Kenny Rogers.

You're going to say Kenny Rogers for D. Kenny Rogers.

Now then, Todd and Sam,

can you talk us through the board?

I think... Well, the only ones we...

Obviously E's Dolly Parton.

A, I think, is possibly Shania Twain, but I'm not...

-I think Dolly Parton's going to be too high.

-Yes.

-I think we should go for A.

-Let's give it a bash.

We're going to just guess that A is Shania Twain and hope for the best.

A, Shania Twain. We have Kenny Rogers and Shania Twain.

Stewart and Mel said Kenny Rogers. Let's see if that's right

and how many people said Kenny Rogers.

It's absolutely right.

Great answer.

-37.

-APPLAUSE

Todd and Sam have said A is Shania Twain.

I think this is going to be close. I wouldn't want to call it.

Let's find out. How many of our 100 people said Shania Twain?

-It's right.

-Yes!

Oh!

40 for Shania Twain! I thought you were going to do it there.

Very well done to both pairs, but Stewart and Mel particularly.

After one question, you're up 1-0.

-That was close, wasn't it?

-Yes.

-I like a bit of country.

Exploring the back catalogue of Kenny Rogers is not a bad idea to do.

He's got some cracking tunes.

Now, B is a terrific answer.

2 points if you knew that was Charley Pride.

Very well done if you said that.

And another good answer is C, much more famous recently,

Reba McEntire. Big country star. Would've scored 4 points.

And E is definitely Dolly Parton. What do you think Dolly scored?

I think she might be in the 80s.

-She's 94.

-Wow! Look at that! Good for her.

-94 points.

-Brilliant.

Here comes your second question.

Todd and Sam, you answer first. You have to win it to stay in the game.

It concerns...

LAUGHTER

-Broken Biscuits.

-Can you guess what this might be?

-I like it.

-It's going to be an anagram.

-It is.

We'll show you the names of five biscuits in anagram form.

Can you solve them and pick the most obscure?

Excellent. Let's reveal our five biscuit anagrams.

Here they come. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are, five biscuits.

-(The third one's Garibaldi.

-Custard Cream is the last one.)

We're going to go with A Hectic Soviet Lodge

as Chocolate Digestive.

Chocolate Digestive - A Hectic Soviet Lodge.

Stewart and Mel, can you talk us through the rest of the board?

Erm... No!

We do know the bottom one's Custard Cream

and the third one down, we think is Garibaldi.

-So I think we're going to go for Garibaldi.

-Mm.

OK, you're going to say Airbag Lid - Garibaldi.

Todd and Sam have gone for Chocolate Digestive.

Let's see if that's right and how many people said it.

It is right.

-20.

-APPLAUSE

20 for Chocolate Digestive.

Stewart and Mel, you have gone for Garibaldi - Airbag Lid.

Let's see if that's right, let's see how many people spotted Garibaldi.

It's right.

-APPLAUSE

-46.

Very well done, Todd and Sam. You're back in the game.

-After two questions, it's 1-1.

-Yes, well played.

-How did you get on with this round?

-Hopeless.

It's quite hard, isn't it? Cursed Tarmac, you're right, was Custard Cream.

That would've scored 38 points.

But those top two,

the second one is...

-..Bourbon Cream.

-I said Bourbon "something".

Would've scored you 13.

And the top one is a pointless answer.

Anybody at all got that?

WOMAN: Shortbread Finger.

-Shortbread Finger.

-Very good!

-That's a pointless answer.

-Well done to anyone who got that -

-That's not really a real biscuit.

-Not a real...?!

Sorry! I'm going to stop you there for a second!

-You can't really dunk it, can you?

-It's perfect for dunking.

-Ooh, no!

I don't really consider it in the biscuit family!

Oh! APPLAUSE & LAUGHTER

What a can of worms that was!

Right, OK! Phewf!

OK, this is the decider. Whoever wins this goes through to the final

and plays for that massive jackpot of £4,000.

Best of luck to both pairs. It concerns...

The Magna Carta.

-Richard.

-Sam, I hope you don't have any controversial opinions on the Magna Carta.

We're going to show you five clues to facts about the Magna Carta.

The team that picks the most obscure will play for the jackpot.

-Very best of luck.

-OK.

Let's reveal our five clues.

Here they are. We have got...

I'll read those one last time.

There we are, five clues to facts about the Magna Carta.

Stewart and Mel, you go first.

SHE WHISPERS

-I don't know. Yes, go for that one.

-Yes?

Not a great round for us,

but I think we're going to go for

the year in which the Magna Carta was sealed

and say 1565.

1565, say Stewart and Mel. 1565.

Todd and Sam, the board is yours.

See if you can talk us through any of these.

-I don't think our history teachers are going to be very impressed.

-No.

-We think we can hazard a guess at...

-The chat show host.

-Yes, it's either David Letterman...

-Or Jay Leno.

-They're both kind of...

-Erm...

I think the King of England must've been...

I'm judging on the fact that it was Henry VIII and I don't know why.

-If it is, the Archbishop's, erm...

-Thomas a Becket.

-Thomas a Becket.

-We should go for the chat show host.

-David Letterman or Jay Leno?

I'm not confident on either, really.

-Shall we say David Letterman?

-Let's go for it.

We're going to say the chat show host is David Letterman.

David Letterman, say Todd and Sam. David Letterman.

We have 1565 versus David Letterman.

1565 was the answer from Stewart and Mel.

Let's see if that's right. Let's see how many people said 1565.

Ooh.

No. Todd and Sam have said David Letterman.

All you have to be is correct and you are through to the final.

David Letterman. Is it right?

-It is right!

-Yes!

-You are going through to the final to play for that jackpot.

-35 people said David Letterman.

-APPLAUSE

Well done, Todd and Sam.

After three question, you are through to the final 2-1.

Unlucky, Stewart and Mel. You're very close with 1565.

You're just 350 years out. LAUGHTER

-It's annoying when you lose when it's...

-So close!

1215, it was. Would've scored you 18 points.

Now, the king who accepted and sealed the Magna Carta...

-It wasn't Henry VIII.

-John.

-It was King John.

King John. He would've scored you 38.

The Archbishop of Canterbury was Stephen Langton.

3 points. Terrific answer if you said that.

And the number of clauses, well, this is a pointless answer.

I think this is even harder than Shortbread Finger.

-You wouldn't have a clue?

-No, not a clue.

You'd take a long time guessing it, as well. It's 63.

63. Very well done if you said that.

Thank you.

At the end of our head-to-head, our losing pair is Stewart and Mel.

You played so well throughout the show.

They were quite tough categories!

Very well done in the biscuits, everyone! That was great.

But the country music stars was pretty tough,

and facts on Magna Carta, really very testing indeed.

We'll see you again next time. We'll look forward to that.

-Stewart and Mel, thanks so much for playing.

-Thank you.

-Good luck.

-Thanks.

But for Todd and Sam, it's time for our Pointless final.

Congratulations, Todd and Sam,

you've fought off the competition and you've won our coveted Pointless trophy.

You now have a chance to win our jackpot,

which, at the end of the show, stands at £4,000.

What would you like to see come up in this final round?

Sport, I guess.

-American sport.

-Possibly geography.

-Geography, yes.

-Sam's pretty keen on chemistry.

-Science.

Maybe animation. I like Disney.

-OK.

-I've just listed everything you're not going to put up there!

I never know what will come up.

OK, as always, you have to start by choosing a category.

Here are your four options. They are...

-Erm, well...

-Not Prizewinners because that could be anything!

-Yes.

-I'm not too keen on Oxford. British Sitcoms could be anything.

-We said we wouldn't do film.

-I know.

American Politics could be anything, though.

But Prizewinners could be Nobel Prize-winners!

-It might not be!

-Well, you know.

What do you think?

If you want to go for Prizewinners...

Shall we? Honestly, out of those ones...

American Politics I will be terrible at. Go on, then.

He's boss so I'm going to go with him.

-Prizewinners.

-Prizewinners, please.

-OK.

Prizewinners. Richard?

We'll give you three options. You have one minute, give us three answers,

but you can choose from any of these three options...

So BAFTA Best Film, Booker Prize novels,

or Brit Award Best Single since 2000. Good luck.

OK. You've got a minute to come up with three answers.

To win that jackpot of £4,000,

only one of them has to be pointless.

The answers you provide can come under any of these categories.

They can be all three from one, or two from one and one from another,

-but they have to come from...

-HE READS LIST

-Are you ready?

-BOTH: Yes.

-Let's put 60 seconds on the clock.

-There they are. Your time starts now.

-What do you know?

Possibly Adele, but she's quite obvious.

-Jessie J? Did she win Best Single?

-She could've. That would be lower.

-Any novels?

-Does that include, er... The Booker Prize,

-is that fiction, as well, or...?

-I don't know what the Booker Prize is!

-I don't know if Philip Pullman won anything.

-Possibly. Films?

Films that won the BAFTA for Best Film?

-The Hurt Locker. I know it won an Oscar.

-Possibly.

-Slumdog.

-Slumdog Millionaire.

-That'll be quite high. Good answer, though.

-It could be.

What's the other Danny Boyle? Did Trainspotting win anything?

-When was Trainspotting?

-It was the '90s, wasn't it? Erm...

Films, films, films...

I'm going to say Jessie J won Best Single.

-Slumdog Millionaire.

-Slumdog Millionaire.

-10 seconds left.

-We could think of another act. Kasabian or something.

Kasabian could've won Best Single.

-Who did Ruby?

-Kaiser Chiefs.

-Say that.

OK. Time is up. I now need your three answers.

-OK.

-Films that have won the BAFTA,

we think one of them will be Slumdog Millionaire.

Slumdog Millionaire.

-Acts that have won Best Single, we'll say Jessie J.

-Jessie J.

-And Kaiser Chiefs.

-Kaiser Chiefs. So two in that category.

-Yes.

Which do you think is your best shot at a pointless answer?

-Kaiser Chiefs, if it's correct.

-Kaiser Chiefs we'll put last.

-Which is your least likely?

-BOTH: Slumdog.

-We'll put that first.

Let's put those up on the board in that order. We have got...

Very best of luck. Your first answer was Slumdog Millionaire.

This has to be pointless for you to win that jackpot of £4,000.

Let's find out. Slumdog Millionaire, did it win BAFTA for Best Film?

How many people said it?

It did win the BAFTA for Best Film. Very well done.

A correct answer. That's the first thing it had to be.

The second thing it has to be is pointless.

It's taking us down through the teens, into single figures.

-6! That's a great score.

-It's lower than I thought.

Very well done.

Not a pointless answer, though, so we move on to your next answer.

The second answer you gave was Jessie J.

Again, this has to be correct, then it has to be pointless.

£4,000 - that's a decent jackpot.

Todd, what would you do with your share?

I'd get a really nice trophy cabinet for my trophy.

-What a good idea!

-The first of many to come.

-Sam, what about you?

-A nice holiday, I think, somewhere hot.

OK, you have said Jessie J.

Let's see if she ever won a Brit Award for Best Single.

If she did, how many people said it?

Not Jessie J. But if she had, I don't think that would've been a pointless answer.

She should've.

-You tell her!

-Tell her to get on it!

-Yes.

OK, now, everything is riding on your final answer,

Kaiser Chiefs.

Let's hope that this is a pointless answer.

If it is, you leave here with £4,000.

Have the Kaiser Chiefs won Best Single Award at the Brits since 2000?

How many people said them?

Oh! Bad luck!

-APPLAUSE

-Bad luck!

Well, one perfectly good answer there

and two perfectly plausible answers, but alas,

neither Jessie J nor Kaiser Chiefs have won Best Single. More's the pity.

You didn't manage to find that all-important pointless answer,

so you don't leave here with today's jackpot of £4,000.

That rolls over onto the next show. We've enjoyed having you.

You do get to take home a Pointless trophy each, so well done.

APPLAUSE

Lovely to see you do so well after you joined the 200 Club in your first show,

and now all the way through to the final. It can be done.

Two perfectly good answers. Jessie J's been nominated twice in 2012 and 2013.

She lost out to One Direction and Adele.

-I was going to say One Direction!

-They wouldn't have won you the points. They scored 10.

The Kaiser Chiefs were nominated in 2008. They lost out to Take That.

Let's take a look at some pointless answers in some of these categories.

Films that have won the BAFTA for Best Film...

Atonement would've been a pointless answer. The Aviator.

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring was a pointless answer.

And The Pianist. Well done if you said any of those.

Novels that have won the Booker Prize... There's lots.

The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood,

The Line of Beauty by Alan Hollinghurst,

The Sense of an Ending, Julian Barnes and Vernon God Little by DBC Pierre.

Also, The Finkler Question, The Gathering,

The Inheritance of Loss, The Sea, The White Tiger and True History of the Kelly Gang.

Well done if you said any of those.

And acts that have had a Brit Award for Best Single... Liberty X won it for Just A Little.

S Club 7 won for Don't Stop Movin'. Tinie Tempah won it for Pass Out.

And Will Young won it for Your Game. Well done if you said any of those.

I hope there was nothing up there that's too obvious.

Might you had said any of those?

-Out of those, no, but...

-At a push, S Club.

-I forget how far back 2000 actually is.

-Easily done.

We have to say goodbye to you. We've loved having you on the show. Thank you so much for playing.

-Todd and Sam...

-APPLAUSE

Sadly, Todd and Sam didn't win our jackpot, which means it rolls over onto the next show,

-when we will be playing for £5,000.

-APPLAUSE

-Join us to see if someone wins it. Meanwhile, goodbye from Richard...

-Goodbye.

-..and goodbye from me. Goodbye.

-APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd