Sophie and Danny Snog Marry Avoid?

Shake it, shake it, shake it!

Stay!

I'm Ellie Taylor.

Snog Marry Avoid? is back on the road fighting the fakery of Britain.

POD would like to know why your hair looks like a bog brush?

Because it suits me.

Oi, you, orange-faced one!

Put down the fake tan because POD has had enough.

The makeunder machine that is POD is back with a vengeance

and on tour, transforming the country's fiercest fake fanatics.

You're one of the most orange people I've ever seen.

Oh, shut up, you big hard drive.

Families across Britain have had enough of the fakery that's stolen

their sons and their daughters, their brothers and their sisters.

-ALL:

-Down with fakery, down with fakery!

We haven't brought her up to look like this.

From Birmingham to Bromley,

Cardiff to Liverpool, she'll be creating natural beauties

on a street near you.

Why do you look like a dolly that's melted in a fire?

Oh, POD, you're so mean why would you say that to me?

Plus, POD is challenging me to find the country's fakest fads

and try them on for size.

No, work the bum, go, woo-hoo!

Don't go out dressed like that.

Why?

You might get arrested.

We are chiselling away at fakery. This is Snog Marry Avoid?

This week, POD has landed in the second biggest city in the UK.

It's got more canals than Venice.

An oversized post box.

And supersize fakery.

We're back in Birmingham.

Hiya, POD.

Hello, Ellie.

Hi, POD, can you guess where we are today?

Er...I'm going to go with Outer Mongolia?

No, we're actually in...that's my Birmingham accent.

Ah, yes, Birmingham.

POD computes that here in the Midlands, Ellie,

the latest trend is for showing off one's curvy rear end.

Big butts?

Affirmative. The latest thing is the Brum Bum.

Ladies with big bums, that's what we're talking about today? Like J-Lo, Kim K?

Correct.

Well that's a good thing, isn't it? Showing how bootylicious you are.

There is natural beauty in a natural booty

but my highly-tuned sensors detect fakery at work here

and your mission is to find out what's going on.

Oh, all right then, I don't know if you're ready for this chelly,

but I'll try and get to the bottom of it!

You don't appreciate me.

Coming up on tonight's show, we meet a fakery fashionista

who's a bit of a cheeky girl.

Boobs out, bum out, everything really.

We'll be finding out what fakery

is lurking on the streets of Birmingham.

Huge lashes.

If you turn around you can knock yourself out.

Yeah.

I go large in the derriere department.

Work that toosh, girl, work the bum, go!

Woo-hoo!

And POD interfaces with a colour clashing catastrophe,

who thinks he's a male Nicky Minaj.

I just can't stop looking at myself, I'm so good to look at.

Here in Birmingham there seems to be something bogus

about the brummie style, so we're hitting the streets

to find out what fakery is afoot.

Brum girls are the best because we're just awesome

in every way possible.

Why do your eyebrows look like they're from a different planet?

I like them, I think they look nice.

Fake nails, fake tan, fake hair, fake eyelashes.

Everything has to be fake and big and orange.

Lots of make-up. No eyebrows.

Lots of red lipstick everywhere.

Got to have your make-up about that thick.

Yeah, that thick, and coming up like up there.

Do you like that look?

-BOTH:

-Oh, no!

Dresses, heels, lots of gloss.

Gloss, as in paint?

No, lip gloss, POD.

Yeah. That's it.

Short shorts with the bum cheeks hanging out.

Small shorts and a bra and that's about it.

Now for a girl whose hair is her "mane" attraction,

but all three generations of her family are tearing theirs out!

Hi, I'm Sophie Bow, 19, from Kent and I'm the most

glamorous girl in town.

What I love about my look is my eyelashes, boobs out, bum out,

short outfits, everything really.

When I'm out with Sophie,

I feel a little bit of embarrassment sometimes

because her skirt is so short.

I just hope she doesn't bend over.

My ambition is to be like Pamela Anderson.

Because she's got big boobs and one day I'm hoping to have

big fake boobs.

One of my favourite tips is when you're spray tanning,

put sanitary towels on the bottom of your feet.

It stops you getting tan on them.

I don't really like Sophie's look.

I think she gives off the wrong impression a bit to others.

I think it's a worry to both the parents.

I'd like to see her more natural.

I think she needs to soften her look in some way.

I spend about three to four hours getting ready.

My boyfriend and friends hate it because they're sitting around

like forever, waiting for me.

I could watch two films before she's even ready.

It takes hours. It's horrible.

I stick about four pieces of hair extensions in and two

big hair pieces.

I don't really like her hair. We call it the mane.

I hate Sophie's hair with a passion. It haunts me.

It hides at the end of her bed in a bag.

I find Sophie's hair extensions all over the place.

I'm forever picking them up. They're just so annoying.

I just really want them out of this house.

When I'm out and about I get a lot of attention.

Guys want to see girls in short shorts and short dresses

and that's what it's about nowadays.

Lot of the fellas turn and look at her and she's wondering why.

I think she wants to be noticed.

I'd like to see Sophie with a little bit of make-up

and no hair extensions

because I might be biased as her dad but I believe that she's so lovely

that she doesn't really need them.

POD, I love all this fakery, you've got your work cut out with me.

I'm here to meet Sophie at this nail bar and I'm expecting she's

going to be wearing some really kind of crazy outfit.

Oh. Yeah. She's not wearing anything at all.

Sophie, that is one glittery bra.

Yeah. I love this bra.

Is that just the usual?

Yeah.

Just wear that out, going shopping?

Yeah, all the time.

You have the longest hair I've ever seen, how long is it?

26 inches.

I imagine that if you got in a bit of wind that could be quite awful.

Yeah.

Tell me about your style icons.

I like Jordan. Her boobs. Big, big, boobs.

-Massive knockers.

-Yeah. I want fake

-BLEEP

-one day.

-Oh, I can't say

-BLEEP

-can I?

You just did, twice. She did it twice.

So why are you coming on Snog Marry Avoid?

Because I would like to see myself more toned down,

just for my family's sake. And friends, to make them happier.

But if it was my choice, I would stay exactly the same way I am.

I've got a few questions to ask you about different role models.

-Michelle Heaton or Michelle Obama?

-(Who are they?)

Michelle Heaton was in Liberty X and Michelle Obama is married to the President of the United States.

She wears very nice dresses from J Crew.

I don't know who they are! I don't know!

Neither of them, they mean nothing to us.

Rebecca Adlington, Olympic gold medallist, or Pamela Anderson?

-Pamela Anderson.

-Joan of Arc or Joey Essex?

-Joey Essex.

-Does your boyfriend look like Joey?

-No.

-Would you like him to?

-Yeah!

Ouch! On camera! Right, Sophie.

After that revelation,

-I'm going to wish you all the very best of luck in POD.

-Thank you.

I am POD, the Personal Overhaul Device. Who are you?

-I'm Sophie Bowe.

-Why are you only wearing half an outfit?

-Because it's sexy.

-Sexy to who?

Sexy to me, to other people. Attention, duh!

-Could you give POD a twirl?

-Yes, sure.

What's with those Daisy Duke shorts?

They're not! They are high waisted shorts!

-Have you seen the Dukes of Hazzard?

-No, what is it?

They're a bit of a hazard, like you are.

How do I look like a hazard, POD?

Hazardous to everyone else's sense of style.

No, not everyone's. Loads of people like to look like me.

What does your boyfriend think of your look?

He thinks I look like Cousin Itt, cos of all the hair.

SONG: "The Addams Family Theme"

Yes, I kind of see his point.

POD computes that you are an incredibly pretty girl.

Thank you, POD.

So I'm confused why you're trying to make yourself look like a slapper.

I'm not a slapper, though.

People might think I'm a slapper but this is just me

and I like to dress this way.

I think there's something wrong with your lens, POD.

Yes, it's got fakery smothered all over it after being with you.

-Maybe I can draw your eyebrows on.

-No, thank you.

You can try my hair on as well, if you like.

-I don't want to look like a yeti.

-Pink lipstick?

That's quite enough out of you. SHE LAUGHS

-What does your family think of your look?

-My family hate my look.

They think I should tone it down more but I love it.

How would you feel without all your fakery?

I probably would feel more fu-fu- how do you say that word?

"Fu-si-ta-tacated"? How do you say that word?

I think the word you're looking for is sophisticated.

Let's try it together, shall we?

-So...phist...

-So...phist...

-I...ca...ted.

-I...ca...ted.

Sophisticated!

-Well done, Sophie.

-Whoo!

Run phase One - Public Analysis.

Everyone will love me!

I asked the public would they want to snog, marry or avoid you.

OK, POD.

-What do you think they said?

-Obviously snog.

I'd probably avoid her.

She looks quite a bit like a Barbie doll

and that's not really a good look for me.

Oh, come on! Really?

I would most definitely avoid her

because she's got too much tan and she looks too fake.

They don't know what they're talking about, POD.

I'd avoid her cos she looks dangerous.

Whoo! I'm dangerous!

-93% of the public said they would want to avoid you.

-No way!

POD computes these are the people that want you to get a makeunder:

Your mum, your dad, your boyfriend,

-both of your nans and all your friends.

-Yes, POD.

POD's verdict is:

-I can't believe you just said that!

-Run the Deep Cleanse.

No! How can you do this to me?

-Get rid of that hair.

-Oh, no!

You're going to make me cry!

Have you got caught in your own net?

-It's stuck to me!

-Lose those lashes!

MUSIC: "The Addams Family Theme"

I look like Aladdin!

Let's see that wipe. It looks like last night's vindaloo!

Run the makeunder!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God.

It looks more classy. I like the shoes.

-And the dress.

-What do you think of your hair?

I like it.

-You certainly don't look like Cousin Itt now.

-I know.

I'd say it looks more sophisticated.

Not only does it look more sophisticated

-but you can now say the word.

-Ha-ha! I know!

POD computes you've gone from glamour model to actual model.

Thank you, POD.

Previously, 93% of the people we asked wanted to avoid you.

-What do you think they will say now?

-Marry.

Yeah, I'd definitely snog her. She's naturally pretty. Lovely hair.

-Definitely go for her.

-Oh, that's nice.

Yeah, I'd snog her. She seems quite pretty. She doesn't seem stuck up.

-She seems like a nice girl. Yeah, definitely.

-Thank you!

I would marry her because she looks naturally beautiful

-and she looks like the girl next door.

-Oh, thank you!

That's really nice.

80% of the people we asked said they would like to snog you

-and the rest would like to marry you.

-Oh, that's nice.

-POD computes that this makeunder has been a complete success.

-Whoo!

-Are you ready to show the world your natural beauty?

-Yes, I'm ready, POD.

The PODWalk's been beamed into a bar in Birmingham.

What will Sophie's family make of her new sophisticated look?

I'm feeling so nervous! Oh, my God! I don't want to go out there.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Beautiful! Beautiful!

-Does it sort of live up to expectations?

I love it. I just love the colour, the style.

It's just completely different to what she's, she usually wears.

-What do you think?

-I think it's beautiful. She looks gorgeous.

She doesn't need the hair extensions.

Just so natural and yeah, she looks lovely.

What do you think of your look?

I think it's more classy and sophisticated.

Dan, now on a night out, do you reckon the time taken

-for her to get ready is going to...

-I think it'll slightly improve.

But I'm sure she'll find ways to keep me waiting.

Sophie has been transformed from a yeti-headed bonkers Barbie

to a sophisticated sexy siren.

Really nice to see her confident and yeah, fantastic.

I've learned I've got confidence in myself as a natural beauty.

Hopefully, I can keep this look... when I get used to it a bit more.

It started with J-Lo, but now it's the Kardashians that are bringing

the bootilicious booty back to Britain.

I've heard no-one does it bigger than Birmingham,

so I'm hitting the streets to find out the truth.

Big bums are definitely the fashion in Birmingham.

Go to the gym, do some squats, just try and get your bum the best it can be.

Everyone wants a big bum like Kim Kardashian!

He likes big bums... He said it.

You can buy pants now, actually, that pad your bum out.

The Brum Bum is a big fake bum.

-Do you have a Brum Bum?

-Not today, this is my bum. But I do have one.

Why do they want a bum implant?

-Just so they've got more junk in their trunk, sisters.

-That's enough!

-We've got some junk right here!

It's a bit like... D'you know, like, chicken fillets? But for your bum.

I don't want chicken fillets for my bum!

-The knickers with the pads in.

-Are they just massive TENA Ladys?

-BOTH:

-No!

-They're just the shape of a bum.

These give you the fantastic Kim Kardashian butt.

So I know Birmingham likes its badonkadonks big -

that's bum to me and you -

but what will it make of this bad boy?

Well, I think I'm rocking the Kim Kardashian big bum look,

but what do the Brummies think?

-Go, girl! Go, girl!

-D'you like it?

-Yeah.

-What d'you think of the look?

You look all right apart from that big arse.

-Why would you want to do that to yourself?

-Why wouldn't you?! Open your mind!

-Ooh, sorry!

-Yeah, I like that. Looks a bit...peachy.

-AMERICAN ACCENT:

-Want to take a photo? It'd last longer!

Have you got to go home now? I understand.

Once that's in your mind... Whoo! Does my bum look big in this?

-Massive.

-I like it though.

-Do you?

-Yeah.

-Well, hello, my friend.

I think it's absolutely fabulous. Work that toosh, girl.

Go, work the bum, go! Whoo!

Now for Danny who likes to wear a lot of pink to make the boys wink.

Unfortunately, I think it's going to make POD wince.

Hi, I'm Danny GoGo, I'm 19, and I'm from Brighton - whoo!

I'm like a local celebrity in Brighton, people stop me

and ask me for my photo all the time. And I love it.

My look is very bright, vibrant, tarty and very attention-seeking.

I just can't stop looking at myself, I'm so good to look at!

What I love most about my look is my pink hair.

When I walk down the street, all eyes are on me.

This pink hair has got me a lot of attention.

I feel like I'm Nicki Minaj.

Hi, fake tan time. Whoo!

My mum absolutely hates doing my fake tan.

I've been doing Danny's tan for about two years,

since he's become a bit vain.

I want it darker, little bit darker.

I'd rather not go out with Daniel in public, looking quite so orange.

He looks tarty, a bit arrogant. Almost drag queen.

Danny's look has affected the family life,

especially with his sister because I think she gets quite embarrassed.

I started wearing make-up at high school when I used to have acne,

then I found myself using it on a regular basis.

My acne cleared up but I was just too addicted to the foundation

so I kept it, and then the pink came along!

He may actually have a few people who are laughing at him

as opposed to with him, which is a shame because he's such a nice chap.

I would love to find a fella that's really in to me,

but I don't think I'm confident with the real me.

I need fakery to be real. Hash tag - party time!

I think Daniel does want a relationship.

It would be really lovely if he would settle down.

-Hi, I'm Helen.

-I'm Sam.

BOTH: We're Danny's friends.

I think if he wants to find a boyfriend, find love,

he needs to tone it down a bit.

POD, I would love it

if you could make Daniel a little bit more natural,

but still keep that confidence and that little sparkle about him.

POD, I'm Danny GoGo,

and if you think you can change all this fakery, it's a no-no!

Whoo!

Whoo-whoo!

Weird pink things, funny go-go top...

The whiff of fake tan, I know who's in here.

-Danny?

-Hello.

Back away from the tanning booth, put some clothes on and come with me.

Come on. Don't touch me.

Danny, I feel like you're going to poke my eyes out with those things.

-What is that?!

-These are my new babies

and they are made out of foam and...

-I won't poke your eyes out, don't worry.

-What do your family make of how you look?

-My mum thinks it's gone a bit OTT, but my sister can't even look at me, so...

-Oh, no!

-I know, I know.

We're very different as well, but we're even more different now.

So is there a lovely, beautiful Mister in your life at the minute?

D'you know, there's no-one in my life at the moment

and I don't know why no-one wants me.

I'm glamorous, I'm pink, I'm fluffy, and I'm lovely to hug.

-SHE LAUGHS

-You just described yourself like a little pussy cat or something.

-I don't bite.

-OK, I've got a little quiz for you about...fellas and things.

-Do you spend so long getting your hair and make-up right that you turn up two hours late?

-Yes.

-Have you done that?

-Yep. Well, no, one hour and a half.

When you're on a date, are you a very good listener,

d'you want to know about the other person?

Or is it, "Danny, Danny, Danny. GoGo, GoGo... La la la..."?

No, I listen to what they've got to say. But it is very much about me.

-SHE LAUGHS

-OK, it's all about me.

-It's all about you?

-Yeah.

You didn't convince even yourself when you said that.

"Yeah, it's really important to listen. It's not. It's about me."

Do you order a nice frugal chicken salad or do you go...

-"Bring on the lobster!"

-I would probably just have another drink.

-You don't eat?

-Well, cos, I don't want to mess up my lipstick.

In that case, Danny, all I need to say is - very, very good luck.

I am POD the Personal Overhaul Device, who are you?

I am Danny GoGo.

POD would like to know why you want to look like a toy troll?

-HE LAUGHS

-Ooh, POD, that's not very nice.

-So, Danny, why are you dressing like this?

-For attention.

And I guess I'm trying to attract the guy that I like.

-Describe your ideal man.

-Tall, dark, handsome, tanned and "musculine".

What is "musculine"?

"Musculine" is, like, buff. You know, got some guns on you.

POD computes you have combined masculine

and muscular to create "musculine".

"Musculine", yeah... Oh.

OK.

Is your look inspired by things you might find on a pier?

I don't know what you mean, POD.

Ah! Oh, my God! You've brought me candy.

Are you wearing candy as a fascinator?

Yeah, it's my new, like, trend.

POD computes you've taken more fakery

and turned it into frightful fashion.

-I'm having all of that tat back, stop eating it.

-No!

No! You've taken away my accessory.

You'd better start getting used to that.

Run Phase One - Public Analysis.

I asked the public if they would want to

Snog, Marry or Avoid this boy.

What do you think they said?

-Avoid.

-Shall we find out?

Let's go!

I'd definitely avoid cos I like natural

and there's nothing natural about that lad.

The hair, it's just awful. It's a mess.

Oh, mate! Just a mess?

I'd avoid. Too much eye make-up, pink hair. No.

OK, POD.

I would avoid, he's not exactly my type.

What exactly IS his type?

Danny, 100% said "Avoid".

Oh, my God.

POD's verdict is you are a...

Let's make it happen.

-Run Phase Two - Deep Cleanse.

-God.

Lose the arm warmers.

And the eyelashes.

Oh, my God.

Looks like a melted troll.

Look at that line under your chin.

Yeah, that's the good bit, right there. This is the bad bit.

Run the makeunder in three, two, one...

Oh.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. My hair!

-I think I look more...manly.

-You mean "musculine"?

Yes, "musculine", POD.

-What do you think?

-I love it. I love my hair.

I look dateable, POD.

You certainly do. Would you like to hear what the general public now think of your look?

Yes, I'd love to, POD.

What do you think they said?

Snog.

I'd definitely snog him cos he looks well fit.

Oh, thank you.

Definitely snog him, looks like he'd be a good pull.

So they say they'd pull me, then?

Definitely wouldn't marry him cos I'm hoping to marry someone else,

but, yeah, he seems like a nice guy.

I'd pop into a bar, buy him a cheap drink and yeah,

go for a snog, why not?

-He's cute.

-Oh!

Do I attract bad boys now?

Apparently so.

100% of the people we asked, Danny, now want to snog you.

Everyone wants a bit of GoGo! Whoo!

-Danny, are you ready to show the world your gorgeousness?

-Bring it on!

Initiate PODWalk.

It's now time for Danny to reveal his new male-model look on the PODWalk.

What will his family make of his pink-free posing?

I think they're going to see the real me

and I think they're in for a big shock.

CHEERING

-I miss my pink hair, but...yeah.

-What are you thinking, Danny's mum?

-He looks so smart.

-What about the pink hair?

-I'm very glad it's gone.

-I think it looks really nice like that.

-You like it?

-Yeah.

-Oh, thank you! Ooh!

-What d'you reckon?

I think that's a huge improvement, huge.

Aw, thank you, guys. Thank you. Whoo!

Danny has been transformed from a Misguided Minaj Monstrosity

to a Modest Man Magnet.

I thought, "Wow!" I really did. I thought he was gorgeous.

Just to walk in front of my parents and my sister, especially,

cos I know she doesn't like my look very much,

but I think I've proved today that we can now have a better relationship with each other

and the Danny on the catwalk today is more confident, sweeter

and more approachable.

Our Birmingham mission is almost over,

but there's still time for a few hair-raising encounters with POD.

Hello, POD.

POD would like to know why your hair looks like a bog brush?

Because it suits me.

-Have you always been this pink?

-Mmm... No.

-Glad to hear it.

-I've been pinker.

There seems to be something wrong with your hair colour.

What's wrong with my hair colour?

It looks a bit like an old lady's blue rinse.

It's not a blue rinse!

Is that an eyeball around your neck?

-Yes, it is. It's got an eye on you.

-I see.

Natural is beautiful. That's what you are.

Do you feel a bit hypocritical with bright pink hair?

-Who's got bright pink hair?

-Oh, you!

Oh, me? Oh, no. It's not really bright.

Is this look appropriate for your age?

-Absolutely. Who cares.

-Yeah! If you've got it, flaunt it, innit?

Sophie and Danny GoGo came into POD with lots of orange and pink

and not many clothes.

But then they were made under to look really quite classy.

Did they keep their new looks?

Non - no, we didn't. First of all, can we address the fact you are wearing earphones.

-I know, I know.

-What is going on?

-They're keeping my ears warm.

-It's for fashion, isn't it?

-Yes, definitely.

-What happened, Danny?

I just felt more comfortable like this. I felt like...

I mean, I always wear stuff that I make as well,

but it's more toned down.

This is my natural skin colour and it looks...

-That's true. That's a lot better.

-Yeah, it doesn't look so tacky.

-And the hair?

-I did like the jet black hair but it was just a bit...

It wasn't me, I didn't feel like it was me.

But I did pull when I had all natural, jet black hair, so...

-Did you?!

-I did, yeah.

-I looked more... Normal, I guess.

-And you didn't like that so you went back to this?

That's one thing I've learnt -

if I want to settle down and have a relationship and I know I'm ready -

go back to the brown hair.

-Is this how you're going out at night at the minute?

-Yes.

Do you think that's a direct result of coming to see POD then?

Definitely, I wanted to look more approachable

and look more smarter and suited.

And have a lot more good attention.

So, Sophie... How long did you keep the natural hair?

For about a couple of weeks, then I changed it.

Tell me any other things that have changed then.

-You're not as brown.

-Not the fake tan. No sunbeds, just natural.

-Oh, really?

-Yep.

-And what about the clothes?

-I think I go out more covered up.

-Why's that?

-It just looks more sophisticated and classy.

D'you think you'd ever go back to how you were?

-I don't know... I don't know.

-Never say never.

-You will, she will.

You will. I know you will.

-Does it take one to know one?

-Yeah.

-Definitely, yeah. High five. High five for that.

Guys, thank you so much for coming on.

-Just go forth and be pink and FABULOUS together.

-Whoo!

-Hello!

-Ah, Ellie, you're back at last. Come on in.

Hi, POD, so we come to the end of the day in Birmingham.

Yes, and the end being quite apt considering your mission.

I've had a great day, I've just seen bums, bums, bums everywhere. It's been brilliant.

Yes, I'd like to say we've come to a natural end, but I fear not.

I think we need to carry on.

We can't, I'm afraid. I'm going for dinner in the Balti Triangle,

but I'll bring you back a Peshwari if you're lucky. You can POD off.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd