Episode 5 The Apprentice: You're Fired

Good evening welcome to the The Apprentice: You're Fired. What an

explosive ending with the help of unseen footage we will discover the

secret of the sock and the mystery of the oud. It turns out that Jason

isn't the most gifted runner in the world. . Come on, come on.

But if that looked effortful, here is Kurt doing sums in his head. That

is not six foot. . That is not six foot. 42 sent metres by 72

Now to our panel, Lara Morgan, comedian Miles Jupp and Nicki

Chapman. Welcome to You're Fired. Tonight, task of a business trip to

Dubai left one booted out of the board room in London. Zee, your idea

of coming into business will me is to do with international raiding in

real estate. You have demonstrated you can't deal internationally. You

are to blame for this task, it was out of control, and Zee, you're

fired. Thank you Lord Sugar.

Please welcome Zeeshaan Shah. APPLAUSE

How are you? First Firstly may I say how well you are smelling tonight.

It is erock tiff. A big old tree. It was explosive end to the soaped,

were you disappointed to be fired? Do you think it was the wrong

decision? Yes, I think so, looking back on it I think I had a good

task, delivered well in negotiation, got great bargains but the sub-team

didn't deliver, came back with one item. You came back with two.We

did. Twice as good as them. Half as good as someone who got all four.

I am just saying it wasn't an unqualified success. It is a

difficult task, you are out there in Dubai, we were driving for bargain,

our strategy was a more difficult one and it didn't pay off. We will

pick through the bones but there is one thing you fit a template, that

happens at least once a season, the classics moment, the candidate who

says this task is made for me. And then comes the fall.

. You know Dubai.I know it quite well. It is a second home. Hopefully

I can use that to my advantage. You can put the map away because I know

it like the back of my hand. Seriously. You are not modest, are

you? Oud is a local Arabic perfume. I thought you were the expert.

is a smell most a rashes use called oud. It did say Egyptian mahogany.

It is a scent. Listen, it is a perform. It is spelled differently.

No-one wants to smell like a dining table. . I think you put yourself

forward as someone who knows-it-all, and clearly you don't know it all.

You haven't lived in Dubai but you have worked there, you have lived

there for how long. A couple of years. I am not from London. I have

lived in London 10, 12 years, I wouldn't know where to buy a falcon

hood in London. By the way can I say how you, don't you want to stay in a

hotel in which every room has a hat for a bird. I am sick of checking

into hotels with a falcon, and do you have a hat for your bird? I

thought you supplied hats for the bird! Sorry, back to that in a

second. But I wouldn't know where to go. Obviously you knew more than

they did. Yes,But that doesn't mean you know everything. I think my

knowledge of Dubai worked against me. I knew how to get round and

where different places are, but living in Dubai I have never gone

looking for oud or a falcon hood so I don't know how much advantage the

knowledge was. You would have to say it wasn't a huge advantage. Lara.

This is your, the company you set up, the supplying of quality goods

to quality hotel, where did it all go wrong? I mean, you have said it,

I know Dubai by the back of your hand was a death blow from the

outset. The put away your maps added to it. Frankly the response of

sub-team Leah, who you immediately disenfranchised, a and you even

referred as her, you dictated from the outSethed set you had the

answer, and it was your fault, they, if you like, were fighting against

this flow of I know, I know, and I think you shot yourself in the foot,

I mean the flag issue wasn't your fault, I thought you handled that

really well when you went outside and said it is not the end of the

world. You have to keep positive. . You were killing yourself from the

start. Miles you lived in Dubai? have lived in Dubai. I know about

hotels because I have stolen quite a lot of luxury items from hotels. My

house is full of duvets and towels and things. Cheap slippers. Yes, I

have been out there. Dubai is not an easy place to do anything in a

hurry. Nikki have you worked in Dubai?Dubai? . Have been out a few

times. It is difficult to shop. I wouldn't know where to start. As

soon as you said we don't need the map, your sub-team probably did,

didn't they, to get round. That was the thing, my first impression, I

don't think Leah gave you much chance, I thought that was one fair

on her but things turned round. You didn't give them anything. You were

the project manager but there was someone snapping at your heels from

the start. Was he a good team leader. Terrible. I am really good

with finance, good with figures. am happy with Zee. I felt I would

have done a better job. You assume she was sub-team leader even before

I appointed her. I will go to the Mall with my sub-team. Your

sub-team. I haven't said anything about a sub-team leader yet. All you

did was complain and be a pessimist. Where are you? We changed plan, we

are at the Mall. You are better off going to the souk. Stop talking, we

doesn't have time. Didn't click it was Leah. . I get along with her,

she is nice. On task it is different. Outside it is different,

he is a nice girl. But a critical part of this task was the failure of

communication between myself and Leah, from the beginning it was like

a stand off between me and her. There is a serious allegation with

us, with regard to your relationship with Leah and further then, with

Natalie about being chauvinistic, talking to Neil on the phone, didn't

work well. Not letting Natalie participate in the car. There was a

lot of she was trying to get in and you had the phone book? She did have

an opportunity to do it... aren't there many examples of how

you come across at quite sexist? are there. In this episode? Yes. It

was just a bit of a coincidence. LAUGHTER

LAUGHTER. . You should have spread your sexism

out across the series. The point made in the boardroom, they were

saying with Leah, the way she took over, I did give her the rein, I

said you can. I could have said I have worked with Neil, I know Alex,

but I let her be it. Unfortunately in Natalie's case, I have worked

with her a couple of time, and, I don't think she was good at doing

it. Let us look at the first person you let off the Hook.

The. The best thing I did on this task was get the kandura. If you can

do it for 60 I will buy it from you, if you can't I be buy it somewhere

else. My performance was good. Not bothered about the quality. I think

I have shown I am a great negotiator. I am in a very very

rush. I am happy. The kandura was the wrong sort. It was modern. So

that incurs a fine. . Thank God I never sent you out to get 20 cows

you might have come back with cows? The failure of that Seb team, the

whole team failed. They failed, they came back with one item, the root of

that wuz was the stance that Leah took from the beginning of of

opposition to me, they were a negative team the whole way, from

the off set they were all about this is wrong, that is wrong, if they had

a better attitude I believe they could have done better. Instead of

pinning it on that one incident I pinned it on the over overall team.

Tough to nail somebody on a stance rather than saying he got that

wrong. . She was the deputipm.Is Neil scary. Because you were the

leaderpm when the task went wrong, that is your responsibility. Within

it there was fail failing but... APPLAUSE

That is a fair point, but, but... She is kind of not the first person

to make it, so that is why you are here. Neil looked anxious, as if

going to Dubai was the worst news, like that was a place where he owes

someone a lot of money. He was pal PFI Taiting, had a heavy sweat on

all the time. He did mediate, when Leah and Alex were king off, he was

the one who said -- kicking off, he said get on with the task and he was

good with those. Alex tends to have little rants in the car. He spits

his dummy. He gets angry in the back of a car. I think family holidays in

Alec's car would be... I am going to get angry with myself. . .

Tantrums. I loved him shouting I don't need Viagra, I'm from Wales.

As if everybody in Wales walks round in a state of unforced arousele.

From Wales, I am. But the classic mistake, probably to some extent the

mistakes of the series. How huge was this mistakes? It was the size of

Stonehenge which we know to be that it will. This mistake was Kurt's. .

You were asked to get a six foot by four foot flag.

It is about... 72. 48 by 72. . is not six foot. That is not six

foot. 42 centimetres. So who doesn't know the centimetres from inches?

You? One foot is 12 centimetres. 12 inches in a foot isn't there. Inches

not centimetres. Where is this flag? I would look like a pimple on an

elephant. It is like a blooming napkin this thing.

APPLAUSE Do you know who I blame for this?

Europe. It is the Brussels brewcrats have confused English people like

Kurt who don't know centimetres from inches. Did any alarm bells go off

then? . In the heat of the moment I was on the phone, making the order,

I said it to me and I said it. of you, Natalie heard him saying it

you heard him. Kurt made the mistake on the calculations and got

something fundamentally wrong whereas Natalie didn't and you chose

her to take her in. Is that because her card had been marked? For me,

when you go in, taking people into the boardroom, people are tactful

about it. I stick to my principles, in business. Tactical, rather than

tactful. One thing I would never accuse you of is being tactful.

keep it simple and straight and... Do you take the people into the

boardroom you don't have the relationship with? No, me and Kurt

don't have much of a relationship to be honest, but I saw Natalie as the

Weakest Link. You can understand how that mistake was made, in the heat

of the moment. I knew if I took Kurt back he could have got fired for

that. You wouldn't bring Kurt in because he might have been fired. .

He might have got fired for that which I believe wasn't right. It was

a mistake anybody could have made. I don't believe he should have been

fired for that. But... Here you are. APPLAUSE

You made an impression in episode one with your claim to be almost a

famous historical figure. . A blorfg there thinks he is Napoleon.

Napoleon conquered the world at 32. That is where I am heading. I will

be one of the great greats of this generation in business. I will go

down in history. People who are met me or know me, that should cherish

it, they will know they know someone who did something great. 200 years

after I have lived, people will read about me in books.

APPLAUSE I was flattered by the artwork. Thank you very much.

Definitely the historical vision you have made. You have worked with the

PR industry. How does he rate on the scale? You're up there, really. I'd

call you talent. I do not think there is a modest bone in your body.

But if there is you keep it hidden. Going out there and having true

belief, you do need that. There is a fine line between confidence and

arrogance. You said you do not take criticism well. And?OK, fine! Are

you better now? I have no problem with criticism, just who it comes

from. If somebody has credibility in front of me and I respect that

person, I'll listen to what they have to say. What happens if you

have never met them before? Don't you give them the benefit of the

doubt? It is not often that you have not met someone criticising you!

meet new people every day in life. We can all take lessons from each

other. Do not judge a book by its cover. I am a middle aged woman who

knows not very much. You might meet me in the second class tube train

and we might have a chat. I might have done OK in my life and you may

have missed an opportunity. understand that.

You refer to yourself as a middle aged woman. You ranked in the top

ten in the triathlon. I am delighted to discover that tube trains may

have a first-class! That is something to aspire to. If it comes

to criticism, brace yourself for this.

Zee, the so-called expert of Dubai, dug his own grave. He was over

confident. He brought the wrong people into the boardroom and that

angers me. He is a good salesperson but he failed in this task. Frankly

I have never worked with someone more incompetent. Absolutely not a

clue and what he did not know he made up. I could not go into

business with someone who has a lack of knowledge of their own business.

That is why I fired him. How was that? I do not agree with it

all. But that is their point. there is some tough stuff there.

Leah's claim, that is absurd. I'm sure there are a lot more

incompetent people than myself in the world! What are your plans now?

Staying in international property? have just expanded my business. I am

promoting investment in Pakistan. I do a lot of work with the government

here and in Pakistan. Promoting investors from the UK. There is a

lot of opportunity. I think people like myself who are professional

people should dedicate ourselves to a cause bigger than ourselves.

to the winning team. And Louisa had to pack just the right thing.

People think I'm thick because of the way I look. I'm always smiling

and happy and not very serious. Bikinis! I love to have fun. I will

take this bikini as well. I really don't think you need your bikini!

I want to wear seven inch heels to work I will. I might take this dress

in case we have to go to dinner. On the off chance it was the first

going to dinner and having a swim task! I love Louisa's world. She is

going to have fun. She is quite young. There is something endearing

about her. She gives off the image of just smiling. Underneath there is

another layer to her. For me she is a real contender. She knows what she

is doing underneath. She is shrewd. I like her. She's always encouraging

others. She is savvy enough to be making friends around her. She is

pretty sharp. Something about that suggested it was not actually her

luggage! Miles took on the role of project

manager for the first time this week. People feel they know little

about him. Maybe he has a secret identity.

I think Lord Sugar has been playing the role of board room Batman for

long enough now. With me as his partner he can play the role of a

corporate Robin. How do you find him? He is pretty

smooth. He was a better strategic leader from the outset. He had his

team with him. But a poor mistake not asking for the boss, because

they got 50% off. The others got 10% off. And Lord Sugar had said it was

a negotiating task. Are we going to start a trend of people going up to

retail staff and demanding the boss. I watched the Apprentice. I'm not

coming out again! I have got stuff to do! He comes across as quite

impressive. He is gorgeous!That is not what I asked. I think he was

lucky with this task and had a fantastic team. I did not see much

leadership in him. I think he was lucky. Beautiful on the eye but what

is underneath? Jason, when abroad, very much

becomes the archetypal Englishman. Engaging with the locals patiently

in English but with what he presumes is their accent.

And what material is this? When you buy oud, you buy it how? In one

piece. Put a hat on it so it does not see. An eagle, a big bird. You

put it on your arm and it flies away.

For some reason, I feel I should come to you! There's something

charming about him. Some of his mimes are a little too vivid for

what is required. But he had those lovely striped pyjamas. He is an

archetypal Englishman. Nick Hewer has that type of thing. Like Denholm

Elliott in Indiana Jones. The two of them together are a diplomatic

incident waiting to happen. That is a show! Jason and Nick Hewer. Just

travelling around the world. In matching panama hats. Clearly this

randomer who just happened to be shopping and they latched onto him.

It was a weird challenge. Explain it to that guy. It is a bird, the bird

flies. And then hunts. Then he has to step in, come on, mate, step

away. Like the most refined stag weekend! I'm not sure what he brings

to it. His negotiation, he had this way of going, oh. They finally got

the oud and he said, I was hoping for 300. Oh, my God!The vice consul

said three! You cannot offend the British Embassy!

You would describe yourself as competitive? You have been there in

terms of competition and you have bought the T-shirt.

Life is a competition. It is my gym motivation t-shirt. And also a

saying. I would rather live like a man. No,

I'd rather die like a man. Simplicity is the ultimate

sophistication. What are you on about? I do not see players, I see

spaces. I do not see players, I see spaces. Like Mohammed Ali said, I

hated every day of training but I thought to myself, suffer today and

live the rest of your life a champion.

We are going to the vote. Was Lord Sugar right to fire him? Yes.

the edge of, yes I can do it, yes he was. I'm going to agree. We can

throw it out to the room. If you disagree, hold-up hired. It is

debatable. I think it is fired! If we can put some positive energy to

it, you always get a gift to take away. Something that you sought and

yet is actually available. This is oud. An Arabian scent in a mahogany

container. And that is standard size! Thank you.

Here are your highlights. I am the bling master. He has

diamonds in his diamonds. I am a believer in my own power.

What my mind can conceive, I can achieve. �0.50 for two pints of

milk. He is a good salesman.I am a risk taker. He is a really top guy.

Thank you. Signing off. Zeeshaan Shah!

That's it for tonight. Thanks to all my guests. If you want more then go

to our website at bbc.co.uk/ apprentice for Matt Edmondson's

Awkward Conversations with the fired candidates and don't forget to

follow us on Twitter and Facebook. Next week, The Apprentice is back on

Wednesday night. It's all about corporate away days with a message.

But who will get the message to go home? You are going to provide

entertainment. If you push me, I will flip and then you do not want

to be there. I have been inspired. Voted down. I am not sure what is