Episode 6 The Apprentice: You're Fired

This was mayhem.

That don't look good.

It is not rocket science.

You couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery.

Bloody clueless.

You're fired. You're fired.

You're fired.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Good evening and welcome to The Apprentice You're Fired.

With six tasks completed, we are at the halfway stage,

so tonight we'll be casting our eyes over the ten candidates who

remain in the fight for Lord Sugar's £250,000 business investment.

And we will also see how being polite can sometimes stop you

giving someone the honest answer they deserve.

There's no point in us paying you £50 per head just for stuff,

so, thank you so much for seeing us.

OK, no problem.

While we're here though, can we buy some piping bags from you?

How she bit her tongue I do not know. Now to our entertaining panel.

Events entrepreneur Archie Archer, broadcaster Trevor Nelson

and comedian Russell Kane, welcome to You're Fired.

APPLAUSE

Tonight's task of running a corporate awayday

resulted in one candidate making their way home.

I do know what my instinct is telling me about you, Rebecca.

You haven't proved yourself to me at all, so, Rebecca, you're fired.

Thank you for the opportunity.

Please welcome Rebecca Slater.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Mwah. Mwah.

Please, sit down.

Rebecca, are you disappointed?

Of course, I'm gutted, I would have loved to have got through,

but I guess I didn't stick up for myself

too well in the boardroom, but, yes.

Was it a surprise when you were in there, could you feel it?

It was, because Francesca said, "I'm not bringing you in," beforehand,

"Don't worry, I'm not bringing you in,"

so I thought, "Oh, I can relax."

When did she say that?

-Beforehand, but no criticism...

-Out the window, when it came down to it.

I mean, I love Francesca, she's great...

Yes, she's saying that to everyone, "I'm not bringing you in,

"I'm not bringing him in, not bringing you in.

"None of you are coming in, it's all on me. None of you.

"Take the rest of the day off, knock yourselves out. Go on home."

Let's take a look at where it went wrong for you.

Wine-tasting in a school?!

It wasn't solely down to me, it was a suggestion.

Why don't we choose wine-tasting?

Do you want to do the waffling, or do you want me to do the waffling,

or do we just do it between each other and make it comedy.

It's not so much that we are connoisseurs on wine, but

we know which is the most expensive and therefore the nicest quality.

Your team lost by £500.

You were charged 600 quid for your motivational speaker.

I'm very keen on the motivational speaker.

-I think we can do that ourselves.

-No, no, no.

I'm hearing that it was Rebecca's idea for the wine-tasting,

Rebecca's idea was for the motivational speaker,

that's £900 worth and you would have romped home.

Difficult to know where to start.

You do the waffling, I'll do the waffling,

and we'll just make comedy. It's the recipe.

Let's start with the motivational speaker.

A lot of blame give to you for some reason

as if you had specifically burned £600.

Well, to be honest, that definitely was my thing,

I really did want to go with a motivational speaker

because I thought that was the sort of business content of day.

I could see the way things were going,

and the way things were forming in the day and I thought

we need somebody in who's professional,

who can put that across better.

Archie, you've booked people for these kind of events?

Well, I kind of have a little bit of respect, also, for you

for actually going with the motivational speaker,

because I don't know if anybody stood up enough to the job.

Definitely, that happened, yes.

So you might have been in even more trouble

had you not hired somebody in professionally.

There is something to be said for it,

because I'm not sure if I would have liked to have sat through

a motivational speech given by Jason or Louisa!

I'm not sure the massive business lessons Jason could teach me

about 18th-century Protestant church architecture would have been...

But would you have been able to remember it and repeat it the next day?

No, I'm amazed I got that entire phrase out just there,

let alone the following day when I'm running my Internet travel company,

going, "I suppose, there's lots Plato said about this."

You know, you're a professional speaker, I'm a professional speaker,

we've all done gigs, I mean,

we should be fighting in this part for more professional speakers,

rather than bluffers coming in and doing the job instead, shouldn't we?

Listen, I totally agree with what you did, I think

you did the right thing, you were just unlucky the other team had

-an inspirational motivational speaker for free.

-Yes, he was good.

We watched it and we thought, "Mmm, this is going..."

and then the motivational speaker came on and everyone's attention was like this,

looking at him like this, and that's what you do on awaydays,

we've all been on them, and you need that,

and you are sticking to a brief there, and that was the only part of your whole task that you got right!

And if you didn't do that, you'd have been in real trouble.

Can you imagine what the fine would have been

if you have saved yourself the £600.

People would have gone, "I'm not sure we want to pay for cupcakes

"and...the wine-tasting!"

Well, everybody likes a glass of wine.

I thought it might relax people and we could try

and turn it into some kind of interesting event.

-How much do you know about wine?

-About that much. I know what I like.

The different prices of the wines you'd bought that day

-would be the sum total of your knowledge.

-Absolutely.

So people were expecting something rather than, you know,

I'm not an expert on wine,

but I've heard there are different types of grape, for example.

There are different countries, there are different terroirs,

it's more than just, "Darling, this is a special occasion,

"I have bought a £20 wine."

LAUGHTER

"Hmm, this £20 wine tastes £5 better than the £15 wine we had yesterday."

Are you a wine expert?

For me, this is where the failure was, I mean,

the £600 speaker for me is a false lead,

the wine-tasting didn't fit with the day, didn't fit with school.

It fitted my school, 20/20 over the park, by the dog poo bit,

but, maybe in a posh school you have a Merlot before Latin, I don't know.

It didn't make sense, and it didn't have any narrative to it,

it didn't relate to any business objectives,

and didn't have any relevance to the overall objective of the day.

That said, that's my kind of awayday, let's go and get pissed!

Just a box of booze, let's get off it!

That's even better, a box of booze,

"Which one of these came from a box?"

The wine-tasting skills...

I can taste the cardboard, it's a wonderful vintage, is it Aldi?

"Let me refill that, don't look!"

Put it in a water pistol, wahey!

Any call for wine-tastings on corporate awaydays?

Well, yes, it's a really popular thing to do, but you chose

a theme which was school, and it just didn't fit with your theme.

I think we were running out of ideas, to be fair, though,

and it was like... what shall we go with?

But surely school is the easiest thing in terms of coming up with like...

the sports day thing went out of the window quite quickly,

you got the planks, the team-building planks,

which are very important.

And actually, that didn't look too bad,

it seemed quite successful, I didn't see it because I was cooking,

but that seemed to go pretty successfully, actually.

The business message was vague, at times, almost tenuous.

This may be unfair to do this to you, but I want to see again

how you linked the wine tasting to the tenuous business message.

-Uh-oh!

-Let's enjoy the tenuous business lessons you're trying to get across here.

It's to link in with your company, which is,

I know you provide five-star events and arrangements,

with different costs, so it is to do with costing and quality,

and that is why we have linked this in.

LAUGHTER

Bravo.

On closer examination it made no sense whatsoever,

but you did roughly get it...

We have, by the way, some of the attendees of your day,

-and of the other day...

-Hello!

Give a big wave to them.

Some of the wine people there, as well.

Yeah, I recognise them.

And the guy who went, "I got bored."

The man who got bored during a... that's him, up there, waving away!

Let's get a shot of you, the man who, midway through a fairy cake

demonstration, went, "I'm bored of fairy cakes."

By the way, have you enjoyed today so far?

Yes, great, that'll be five grand.

Because I know you people pay for anything.

We give you a drink outside, you've seen a television show,

yes, divvy up there, my friend.

Obviously, if you want to look at the most egregious

examples of corporate speak,

Francesca was the project manager of the losing team

and for the most hideous uses of jargon alone could have been expelled.

Of all the tasks so far, this is the perfect one for me.

Francesca, a lot of the comments in here are saying that these people were

trying to take us as mugs, they said that you were blagging them.

Moving you forward, to the one goal.

Success at work, success in yourself, or just success in life. And happiness.

Do you believe what you're saying? Can you hear it? Can you hear what you're saying?

I wanted to be a policewoman, I'm not a policewoman now.

Sorry, what was the point of this?

I'm not quite sure yet what is going on.

I thought it was just me. I don't know what you're talking about.

Can everyone hear me OK? Am I loud enough?

All you keep doing is saying, "This is motivational."

If you say it enough times, you convince yourself.

Yes.

This was a total disaster.

Everyone happy?

DARA CHORTLES

I like it. "One goal, one goal.

"Success in life, success in business, success in yourselves,

"and happiness."

That one goal was quite impressive.

I thought the Dalai Lama was going to burst out at the wine-tasting.

Enlightenment is achieved.

I also liked the, "I wanted to be a police officer."

I mean, is it that easy to be a motivational speaker?

"Well, I'm going to talk to you today about how my dream of being

"an astronaut didn't work out, I'm not an astronaut now."

But I think that's why,

with you actually having a motivational speaker,

had Francesca been the motivational speaker,

that would have really been quite disastrous.

Yes, well, when we had the brainstorming session,

I know Jordan in the boardroom piped up and said,

"I was more than prepared to be a motivational speaker,"

but he truly didn't, but had he put a good story across,

-I'm sure we would have considered it.

-Did you not step up?

Me, personally?

I genuinely didn't feel I had, you know,

the expertise to put it across, really.

I wanted to do a really good performance, so, yes.

I don't think your style in The Apprentice would have

-worked as a motivational speaker.

-Thanks.

I like your style, it was very sort of, how can I put it, judgemental.

A little cold at times, I'm just being honest.

A little cold at times, but it was perfect.

It was perfect for the boardroom, we'll get to that bit later,

but I just don't think you had anyone in your team that could have

pulled that off the way Neil did.

If she had done the speech, Francesca, I mean,

just saying I want to be policeman, that's what you said when you were eight, wasn't it?

It's like, "Punch my BCG, see how much pain I can take. Thank you."

What would you have recommended for the school team,

as opposed to what they did?

I think you could have carried the theme more, I mean,

the other team, they had the military...

Nobody was dressed as a teacher!

Exactly, you could have had a bit more uniform.

-How does a teacher dress?

-Well, the mortar and a hat.

Oh, a corny teacher!

I didn't go to that kind of school, did I?

Well, that's not what a real army man looks like, either.

-In a suit, with his two black lines.

-Really?!

That's not what a flamingo looks like a lot of the time, either.

It's like rigid, and about eight feet tall.

Or fire.

-Nothing...looked like it was.

-OK.

It's the corporate world, it's the world of magic and illusion.

On the awayday itself, you were twinned in the kitchen with Jason,

which has happened before on the farm shop task

and you have become a fairly slick machine, the two of you.

Jason's speed is one speed, which is glacial...

Quality takes time!

I'm getting worried that our standards are slipping.

She's very, very quick in what she does,

especially if she's in the kitchen. Bang, bang, chop, chop.

No, carry on peeling. Quick as you can, mate.

Leave that to me. No, no, I'm doing them.

How do you do the time?

Just twist it and press start.

I'm trying to figure out how to do it.

-Just get it out first.

-It is in.

-Just go like that and press play.

-Oh, OK.

Awww!

He's sweet!

I don't think it's, "Press play," by the way, on a microwave.

It's a really dull film of your lasagne slowly

rotating around at a set speed.

In the kitchen,

-was there tactically a bad mistake?

-Jason?

Well, is Jason tactically a bad mistake?

Jason is the mascot of the whole show, I mean,

we can't lose Jason, I mean, every time you see him,

you just start smiling, but I would never want to work with him,

I would never want him to work for me,

I would never want to do a task with him, I can't believe he's still in the show.

-Would you want to invest £250,000 in him?

-£2.50 at most...with Jason!

But we love him, he's just lovable.

He's such a nice guy, how can you not like him?

-He is fab, and eccentric.

-But is he of any use at all in the kitchen?

Actually, you know, he did get quite polished in the end,

and he was pretty slick by the end. I whipped him into shape.

Good for you, very good.

I quite like Jason, I know he's a bit bimbling,

I'm not quite sure what his business is.

Nobody can imagine what his business is.

He's taking scrapings from Egyptian ruins

in order to examine them...

He's got this massive horse, "I'm going to hold soldiers inside it,

"and we'll go into a fortress, it'll be brilliant.

"Troy won't know what's coming!"

"I want to rewrite Carter's history of 18th-century Protestant churches.

"It's not representative at all."

It will be something, if he comes in,

it will be something really wrong,

he will be like, "Yes, I want to export people to work in mines."

What?! Where did this come from?!

"Young people, I will make them work hard,

"with their little fingers digging for diamonds."

What?!

Really Cockney or something. "I want to open a Wetherspoons!

"With a difference. Wallop!"

Randomly open an off-licence in a really bad area,

in the middle of the night

and we'll sell the booze cheap, you know what I mean?

That's my plan. Yeah, it's not going to be that, let's face it.

While we're on the subject of Jason, by the way,

we're always on the lookout for candidates' little traits and habits.

And this is what we found about him.

I just feel that... FLY BUZZES

I think it's... TONGUE SLURPING

I'm...

And...

TONGUE SLURPING

I just feel that...

Yeah...

Watching them...

I'll have some water.

FLIES BUZZING

Usually when the candidates dislike something, they say it's

out of their comfort zone, and Luisa does speak more bluntly.

I hate the corporate world, the boring black suits.

What do you think this is? We're in the corporate world.

You can't go into something saying, "I don't agree, I dislike it."

I think a lot of empty words are spoken in the corporate world.

-You're talking to leading people from the corporate world, saying you don't like what they do.

-Successful

cos they don't stand there and talk a load of crap to people.

You might find that a rough attitude when you get in front of the bank,

asking for investment in your business.

You say you're very unforgiving

and, "If you push me and push me, I will flip.

"And when I flip, you don't want to be there."

I'm not difficult to work with.

I find Luisa obstinate and argumentative.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt today.

You're 25 years old. But I've got my eye on you, OK?

Yeah, it does seem an unusual show to go on

if you hate the corporate world.

It was such a weird way to open though, wasn't it?

Imagine if I sat here and went, "I hate the whole show,

"I hate The Apprentice. First question please, Dara."

Do you know what I hate? I hate ice and I hate dancing.

And I really hate dancing ON ice. Welcome to Dancing On Ice.

Karren's point was very well made in the boardroom.

Most of Karren's point was made in the look Karren gave

after she made the point. When she kind of went...

You and Luisa didn't get on particularly well.

Well, you know, big characters, big egos, you know.

I think she's pretty one-track minded. She's very focused.

So, we'll see how she goes from here.

-Yes.

-It'll be interesting to see. I'll enjoy it.

RUSSELL MAKES CAT NOISE

We do like an honest candidate on this show.

-How are you finding it? Have you been watching Luisa? She's fiery.

-I quite like Luisa.

She keeps going on about, "It's just not easy being this fit.

"Do you know what it's like to be this hot? It's so random!"

I think she's like... The thing about her, she's Real Talk Lu.

You know, it goes in brain, goes straight out the mouth

and if she doesn't like you, she just says it.

Obviously, in this task, you know, by letting the cat out of the bag

by saying, "I don't like corporate," was just unbelievable.

OK, well, I want you to brace yourself, though,

because we do now get to hear what Lord Sugar and your former colleagues have to say about you.

Rebecca was behind the flawed decisions of hiring

a motivational speaker and the wine-tasting.

She's just, like, the glorified cook, really, and good salesperson.

On the second day, she played it safe.

She put herself in the kitchen. Lord Sugar's not looking for a cook,

he's looking for a business partner, and I don't think that's her.

Rebecca failed to demonstrate that she has the judgement that is needed

to go into a joint venture with me, and that's why I fired Rebecca.

-Frustrating, irritating?

-Yeah, disappointing.

You know, Lord Sugar - I value his opinion.

And, you know, everybody else - they're entitled to theirs.

Fair enough! I get the impression of how much value you put on it, though!

What have you learned from this process?

I think to have conviction in myself and really push that through.

Yeah, definitely be a bit more forceful in that way.

Are you still in surgical sales?

I'm still in surgical sales, which I absolutely love,

but I'm also going ahead with my business plan

which I wanted to put towards Lord Sugar,

which is selling moissanite online.

-Your business is... Yeah, it's...

-It's a gem, moissanite.

You've brought... The list of things you've brought to market...

Yeah. I used to manufacture, so I used to sell bindis.

-Wow. I love those. They're gorgeous.

-They're things you stick on your head.

You brought bindis over to us

because you went to India looking for a business idea.

I went to India with a grand, and I knew I was going to set up a business

and I came back with a few bindis, and I just came back at the right time

and I managed to get them into all the big department stores,

so, yes, I kind of created this huge craze.

-Then went from bindis to henna, essentially...

-So Madonna went to India

to do her video, Frozen, and then I was supplying Miss Selfridge,

so I was in the right place at the right time. Sole Indian supplier,

so I brought out the first henna kit and then flooded the market.

And then from being a henna artist, I met lots of other performers

-and it just seemed a natural progression to set up an agency.

-OK.

Now to the winning team. Leah may have been project manager,

but it was Sergeant Neil who saved the day.

"Good morning, Sergeant Neil," is what I am actively looking for.

-ALL:

-Good morning, Sergeant Neil.

I like being branch manager. But a bigger branch, you know, bigger challenges.

Great shot! Well done. Congratulations.

My motivation comes from when I was 18 years of age

and my dad passed away from cancer.

Dad wanted to push me to be a football player.

I played semi-professional football

and I thought that was going to be my dream.

Neil's really stood out for me. He's very engaging.

He's very warm and he can relate to everyone on a personal level,

which is so important with this type of event.

Everybody should always have one key motivation,

make sure that you do everything you can to go out and get it.

-I have to tell you, they were very impressed with you, Neil.

-Thank you.

-Very impressed indeed.

-SUPERHERO MUSIC CLIMAXES

He's always been very brash, very confident.

Every week, he says something along the lines of, "I suppose Neil Clough will have to save the day."

He does like putting things on the record

in which he gives speeches about how Neil Clough will do when Neil Clough has to face this task

because that's what Neil Clough does. Neil Clough just get up and does it, right? But he did.

I was really surprised.

I didn't think he'd be such a great motivational speaker.

But he did really well. And the client really responded well to him.

A bit of humility as well.

-There was a side to him...

-Different side.

-Yeah, and I think he started talking about his father who passed,

and that changed everything. That could change everything for him in this series, you know,

if he doesn't go back to the brash Neil. I really liked him in this.

He was amazing.

Also smart. Himself and Myles,

they were actually talking business to people as they were doing the archery.

Just the two of them, just going one by one and speaking to the client

about actually the message that they were trying to get over,

-and speaking individually to people... REBECCA:

-It came across really professional.

It was less gimmicky and just a bit more real, I suppose.

-As soon as you think someone's being honest, you engage with them a bit more.

-Yes.

Two weeks ago, Alex offered to dress up as a scarecrow,

so it probably wasn't a huge stretch for him to unleash this character.

DRUMS START

-Oi! No! Don't touch my eyebrows.

-Leave his eyebrows.

..someone who makes me very very nervous. Colonel!

MUSIC: Theme from "The A-Team"

-We put Alex in a sergeant major role...

-Colonel.

-Colonel.

Colonel! Let's get one thing clear.

"Yes, Colonel," I'd like to hear. Right! Attention!

Attention, please!

A bit pantomime at times, Alex.

Please walk your team this way!

-Excuse me, sir.

-I hear noise! That was absolutely disgraceful.

Disgusting. You have three minutes left!

I think the Colonel's got plenty of ego to go around.

It's not an enormous complex character to get into,

but I like the commitment of a man

who doesn't want his imaginary rank reduced.

I worked long and hard to become an imaginary colonel

and a member of the women's RAF isn't going to lower me down

to imaginary lieutenant here in this situation.

-He took it a bit too seriously, didn't he?

-Yeah, he loved it.

He got into the character. That's why I think their team

and their theme was carried throughout.

He carried it off. It kind of worked in the end.

-Is there a gig available for him? Would you use him?

-I'd book you looking like that.

Thank you very, very much. I'm very proud of this.

It took ages to work out the make-up techniques...

Actually, I think I look weird. They're going the same way!

I just realised. It's supposed to be that. I've done it wrong again.

I'm just not as good at this as he is, because he puts the hours in.

We got to see the work that's done on Alex. And this was exciting.

-We're just doing a tidy up.

-Yeah.

# I feel pretty, oh so pretty... #

Alex, what are you having done?

I'm having my eyebrows done.

I've got to look after myself, don't I?

# See the pretty girl in that mirror there... #

The thing is with my eyebrows, I've got to keep them in shape. I've got to look good, don't I?

# Such a pretty face, such a pretty dress, such a pretty smile... #

Oh, this is nice.

My eyebrows are perfection.

Bravo, bravo.

Yeah... I'm not entirely sure what look I've gone for

on this particular situation.

I should have just gone for permanently surprised.

That's a much better technique than the one he's using.

Is that too much? As a lady, is that a bit much now, the eyebrow thing?

-The thing is, he's obviously carrying it off really well.

-Come on!

Everybody knows Alex from his eyebrows.

-He's the first candidate you'll remember...

-That's your dream!

I want everybody to know me for my eyebrow.

-There's something memorable about him.

-His eyebrows?

That's the extent of it. As a man who coifs...

I like the way you skipped me!

There's nothing wrong with a bit of coiffing and a bit of topiary wherever you want to do it,

it's just facial topiary is just a bit camp.

He's gone too far back, hasn't he?

You don't want it indicate an emotion by what you've done to your eyebrow.

You want something neutral.

Grand. Now, we have to go to our vote, I'm afraid.

And we're going to go to the three of you first.

Archie, do you think - and just going on the three who were

in the boardroom at the time - Lord Sugar was right to fire Rebecca?

I think if you'd have fought a bit harder, you probably,

you know, could have helped save yourself.

So, because I don't think you fought hard enough,

-I kind of have to agree with the decision.

-Fair enough.

-OK, Trevor?

No, I disagree. I don't think you should have been fired at all.

I think Francesca should have been fired.

-What do you think?

-I'm going to have to agree.

I mean, I think Francesca showed that on the inside

there wasn't much going on with all the lingo, so I would have fired Francesca.

Let's go to the audience. If you agree with Lord Sugar, please hold up "fired".

If you disagree, hold up "hired".

RUSSELL: Look at that, look at that.

That's almost entirely green. Yes, hired.

It's of no real value.

But nonetheless you should be very happy with that.

-I'm very happy with that. Thank you so much.

-It's a small thing,

but it's a thing nonetheless to take away.

Speaking of small things to take away, though, from all this,

we do like to give - it's only a tiny gift - but we do want to give you it.

If you're ever in the position again

where you are standing in front of people speaking about a topic

that you clearly know nothing about,

this is The Bluffer's Guide To Wine.

-Thank you!

-We want you to study this and learn grape -

just grape, not just price, not just "It was on a high shelf or a low shelf."

-There's so much more. We'd like you to have this.

-Thank you so much.

That's lovely. Thanks.

APPLAUSE

You made it to the halfway stage, Rebecca. Here are your highlights.

I don't let people walk over me in life or in business.

I'm confident, I'm assertive and I'm confrontational when needed.

Hello there, ladies. Good afternoon. Do come over.

I'm plain speaking.

-'Arab. Arabic.'

-I'm English.

-PHONE HANGS UP

-Hello?

Come on! It's got rivets in, you can put your pens in, etc.

So, yeah, the Tidy Sidey!

SHE BLOWS A RASPBERRY

Just one of the nicest people I've met.

She's a top girl.

Very decent. A great pleasure to be around.

You went in and you nailed it, and we're all really proud of you.

I've done it!

SHE LAUGHS

Ladies and gentlemen, Rebecca Slater.

APPLAUSE

And that's it for tonight. Thanks to all of my guests.

Don't forget that on our website at bbc.co.uk/apprentice,

you'll find Matt Edmondson's Awkward Conversations

with the fired candidates, and we're also on Twitter and Facebook,

so you can have an Apprentice feast for yourself.

Next week, the candidates enter the alien world of a caravan show,

and it's not long before the wheels start to fall off.

I'm sending you to The Motorhome & Caravan Show,

and you, no hiding.

-Jason, we're not buying motorbikes.

-Caravan, caravan, caravan!

-Ooh! This is nice.

-Wheee!

It's an ectional opxtra. An ectional opxtra?!

You told me you can do things, you lot. You can't!

Has it got a toilet?

I literally hate caravans.

Do you have plugs when you go camping?

Old, old, old.

Ridiculous. Horrible.

-No, thank you.

-No, thanks.

Take care, take care.

Score!

We'll see you at the same time next Wednesday. Goodnight.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd