Episode 4 The Celebrity Apprentice USA

Previously on the Celebrity Apprentice,

the celebrities had to sell wedding dresses for charity.

The one that makes the greatest profit will win.

-The women set out to keep their winning streak going.

-Oh, my God!

He's going to buy a 10,000 wedding dress, you guys.

Project manager Tom Green failed to gain the respect of his team.

-Brian, can you help me with my zipper?

-Absolutely not.

Vodka and cranberry.

Dennis' drinking binge derailed the team.

All he wanted to do was go around the neighbourhood,

having a little drink here and there. I don't know how that sells a wedding dress.

And sucked Tom into an all-night bender.

Are we going to go get a drink at the hotel? I'm ready.

The next morning, Tom got a wake-up call.

-Hey, mother

-BLEEP

-get the

-BLEEP

-up.

Our Project manager's still kind of little bit drunk.

What else could possibly go wrong?

Dennis's guy called, said he's having a lot of trouble

with his eyes and he's not going to come in.

With Tom hung-over and Dennis a complete no-show,

the team picked up the slack.

-You look damn good.

-Why, thank you.

We said, "Let's go. We have a task to do. If it's going to be four of us, fine."

Athena's sales went off without a hitch.

-How much are you paying for a dress? 10,000.

-10,000.

In the boardroom, the women scored yet another victory,

handing the men their third loss in a row.

Former playmate Brande Roderick became one of the biggest ever Apprentice money raisers.

You won 167,000 for your charity.

Tom and Dennis had their excuses but the team had had enough.

-Clint, who would you fire?

-I'd fire both of them.

Frankly, you want to know the truth?

Tom, you were lousy last week, lousy this week. Tom, you're fired. Go.

-Try a little harder, will you, Dennis, please?

-I will try.

-I will try.

-Oh, my God.

-Tom got fired?

-He fired Tom.

-Oh, my God, that was brutal.

-Dennis should have gone before Tom.

-Dennis.

-Hey, what's up, what's up?

-Survived another week.

-Oh, come on, man, it's all good.

-That was hard to see.

-Oh, that's easy.

I'm used to it, I'm used to it.

'There's three teams now.'

There's the girls' team, the guys' team, and my team.

That's what it seems to me.

And I think that one of the lessons that we all have to learn,

when you work for a boss you subordinate yourself to that boss.

He's your boss. You work for him.

And if we don't learn that on our team,

we're going to continue to lose.

A couple of these guys just don't understand what it is to work for a boss.

And I think that some of these guys

have been so in command of their own lives

and without a boss for so long that they don't get it yet.

We're not in our world. We're working for Donald Trump.

If I own a company and you work for me, I'm like this.

What do you want to tell me? What do you want to tell me?

If I were your boss and your eyes were bleeding,

I'd expect you to have three doctors tell me, or to show up anyway.

'The boys suck. They argue with each other.'

I don't know who's running the ship.

'And Dennis has some pretty difficult people to deal with on his team. Namely Clint Black.'

You can't work for me, right. I've got a company but you can't work for me for the way I am.

The men's team is falling apart

so we might be looking at another disaster about to happen.

You know what, you can't put me in a position with money and stuff.

You've got to put me in a position where I'm so good at it that this is what I do.

'Clint was trying to single me out. I'm used to being the black sheep.'

Even in the NBA, I was the one they would always target.

'Michael Jordan, greatest sports figure on the planet ever, he'll tell you,'

"Dennis will work with anybody."

So Clint can go to hell.

I could work for you.

I could work for you because if you were my boss I'd do whatever you tell me to do.

But I couldn't be your boss.

-I worked for harder guys than you, bro.

-BLEEP

-me.

I'll see you down the street.

# Money, money, money, money

# Money

# Money, money, money, money

# Money

# Some people got to have it

# Some people really need it

# Listen to me, y'all

# Do things, do things, do things, Bad things with it

# Dollar bills, y'all Come on

# That lean, oh, mean, mean green

# Almighty dollar

# Don't you know that, money

# Give me a nickel Brother, can you spare a dime?

# Money can drive some people out of their mind

# No good, no good

# Money, money, money, money

# Money. #

-Hi.

-How are you?

-I'm great. Thank you.

-How you been?

-Good.

I'm one of the celebrity advisers for California Police Youth Charities.

And I try to raise as much money as possible to bring programs to these children.

Like giving them scholarships, or taking them to a ball game

and going out there and cooking a hot dog for them.

And how are all the kids doing without me cooking their hot dogs for them?

There's complaints that the hot dogs aren't as good, but they miss you.

'Chris Eaton is the executive director of Californian Police Youth Charities.

'And he has an immense love for kids'

and really wants to do anything in his power to help them.

-So, there's something that I want to give you.

-Uh-oh!

And this should be enough for hot dogs for a very, very long time.

-Can I look at this?

-Yes, you can.

Oh, my God! Are you serious?

166,680.

That's unbelievable.

-Wow!

-Isn't that cool?

-Yeah!

-Glad to do it.

-Wow!

It was amazing, handing the cheque over. That's the reason I'm here.

So I can't wait to be able to go home and really see what that money's going to do.

Are you really going to eat that?

-Good morning.

-Morning.

Welcome to Capitale, one of the great event spaces anywhere in New York City.

It's a terrific place and you're going to be working right here.

Athena, I understand that Joan will be gone all day.

She's in Dallas performing at a charity event

and she'll be back some time tomorrow.

I'm sure she'll be checking in with you.

Now, the telecommunications industry is a 1 trillion industry.

ACN is the largest distributor of video phones anywhere in the world.

They do half a billion dollars' worth of sales a year.

Very successful, very good guys. I've worked with them before.

To my right are Greg and Tony from ACN who will tell you what to do.

Greg.

We're very excited to be here, to have you help us

introduce to the world the new ACN videophone.

Your task is to launch this product to hundreds of ACN representatives.

They will vote for the team who conveys the highest excitement,

the highest level of energy,

and most importantly, the strongest emotional appeal for this product.

In other words, 500 salespeople from ACN are going to be judging you.

Whoever gets the most votes wins, all right?

Now, pick your project managers right now.

Brian, do you want it? All right.

Dennis, why aren't you in that group? You don't like this group. Why aren't you there?

-I'm right here.

-Has Dennis had any influence picking the project manager?

No, they got it. They got it.

-He's a very independent person. OK. Who's the project manager?

-Brian.

OK, Brian, I think you'll do a great job.

'I decided to be project manager because we've gotten our butts kicked. We have.

'This time we're staging an event.'

That's pretty much all my life for the last 20 years.

-OK, Athena, who is your project manager?

-That'll be me.

-Claudia. Very good.

'This task is probably suited to'

my capabilities and my strengths because I'm good at managing people.

Now, the project manager of the winning team

gets 20,000 for their charity.

All right? Don and Ivanka will be my eyes and ears.

They'll be following you, watching, reporting back.

OK? Now, the first thing you'll do is negotiate for which team will do their presentation first,

in the room where the event will take place.

Have a good time. Good luck, thank you.

It's an advantage to go second, you know that.

'After we got our task, the first thing we had to do

'was we had to negotiate'

for which time slot we would perform.

It was a little unusual because the boys were over off to the right.

And then Dennis Rodman was on the far left, sitting on the stairs, doing his own thing.

Team A, 11.30 presentation time.

We want to be B because I want the second presentation.

Shall we ask Dennis what he thinks?

Are you going to come help us or what? Come on.

Oh, you guys got it. Don't worry.

It's not what he does!

To represent us, we picked Annie. She is really tough. We picked her to go up against Clint.

Clint Black is like he's a dictator from hell.

-He is so clean living. He ain't gonna

-BLEEP

-with me.

-So what are you guys thinking?

-We want this slot.

The second presentation.

We both want the same thing. We have to flip a coin.

Is that what you've decided?

If you're not going to budge we'll flip a coin.

-We're not going to budge.

-OK. We're going to flip a coin.

-OK.

-I'll let Clint call it. How about that?

-Hey, Clint Black. This is your

-BLEEP

-now.

-I want to see how good he is now. I want to see how

-BLEEP

-good he is now.

Tails.

-Hey, Clint Black. Let's

-BLEEP BLEEP

-!

-You think you're the

-BLEEP

-?

-Do you...

-No, you think you're the

-BLEEP

-right, bro?

-Do you think...

-You think you're the

-BLEEP

-right, bro?

-Oh, my God!

-Do you think this is going to help?

-Oh,

-BLEEP

-you, man.

At first I thought he was joking.

Then, "Oh, my God, he's serious."

-Think you're a

-BLEEP

-dictator, you know every

-BLEEP

-thing.

-It's a team

-BLEEP

-game. It's a team game.

-BLEEP

-this. I don't need this

-BLEEP

-show.

It's a team game.

I wasn't going to let him make me walk away when he's in my face. There's just no way.

I didn't think there was a chance he'd lay his hands on me, but I wasn't going to let him...

He was getting ready to.

'Dennis really got in my face'

but I really believed that this was more talk

and he wasn't interested in hurting me.

You notice how he got in the face of the smallest dude on the team?

-Just saying.

-I'm the smallest?

-I think you are.

-20 bucks he comes back again.

-Dennis is a wild card.

Dennis could be very useful if he chose to be part of the team.

But Dennis would rather be in Dennis Land.

Do you guys want to call Dennis?

I don't see how I can utilise him, to be honest with you. I'm tired of holding his hand.

And I knew that if I was project manager,

there's nothing we can do to rein him in.

I mean, it's your call, but...

So after this morning, being confrontational, I don't want to deal with that.

'I don't want Dennis here.

'We don't have anyone to be a babysitter.'

We could have won by now if Dennis had focused

and become a part of the team, but Dennis is not a team player.

Dennis wasn't a team player at basketball, but he was an extraordinary player.

Unfortunately, we're not playing basketball.

PHONE RINGS

It's ringing.

-Hi.

-What's up? How you doing?

I have your beautiful face in the whole big screen.

'Our task this week is to launch a really exciting videophone'

in front of 450 sales reps.

So that's going to be pretty exciting, and scary and daunting, because I'm project manager.

So we have to do well.

Hello. I'm Greg, nice to meet you.

Hi, Khloe, how are you?

We set up a meeting with two of the executives from ACN.

They joined us and that was our time to kind of pick their brains

and see what they want out of us.

We'd love to hear from you guys exactly what kind of message you're trying to get across.

What we would like is an exciting, high-energy launch of this product.

Why would I want to have this product in my home?

How can I reconnect with someone that I haven't seen for a while?

They'll never want to go back to the old way of communicating long-distance.

You want to see the person you're speaking to.

Especially if they look good. I'm just saying!

The main focus is the emotional appeal for the product.

How exciting of a launch can you create?

How much emotional appeal can you draw into this presentation,

is what is going to get you the most votes.

Well, thanks for the info, guys, we appreciate it.

We're excited to see what you do.

Once we got our marching orders,

I said, "We've got this."

See you tomorrow. Thanks a lot.

We got a task we can sink our teeth into, brothers.

Hey, let's get organised real quick, the four of us.

Here's the thing, product launches are product launches.

They're a spectacle. They always have some kind of added thing, like a concert, you know.

"Here's Mariah Carey!" But wouldn't you just rather see Brian McKnight?

You know.

'As soon as we got the task, I told Brian,'

"Dude, you're playing. On this task, you're playing live, doing a set."

You're the highlight, a live show.

Ladies and gentlemen, Brian McKnight.

# Doon doon jikky doon doon jikky doon HE BEATBOXES

# Every time... # And I sing my song. Are you with me?

Our objective is to get them excited about the product.

So what's better than Brian McKnight to sing a song for you, how about that?

That's it. I like it.

Hey, guys. Are we going to have a brainstorming session on the ideas?

Well, we're doing that right now.

'Brian really didn't delegate any of the creative stuff to me, he and Jesse'

seem to be working on what the creative direction would be

so I just stayed out of it.

I got another good one.

Why don't we go see if there's a National Guard armoury

around here and film there and have people connecting with the troops?

'I told Brian, I wanted to produce a little video

'showing the phone in action'

and I wanted to do something military.

Hey, it is Jesse James calling.

If I say I'll do something, I'll figure out a way to do it.

I got a whole editor, editing suite, everything.

So if we can make it all the way to West Point and back and film this...

It's 50 miles away.

Obviously, it doesn't make sense to go to West Point, right?

We've got time.

OK, OK!

We're trying to create a feeling of magic.

These are the phones of the future, they're here now.

Are we going to be wanting to use video testimonials or content of some sort?

-Oh, can we...

-No, do you WANT to? Do we have the time to shoot and edit?

'The product launch had to be very exciting, emotional, energetic'

and a stage show. That was the big kicker, the stage show part.

-So we're on the same page, let's run down what'll happen.

-Can you tell me the three things?

-Yes, I can.

OK. First is a mother and her child.

Husband is on a business trip... Or wife is. Either one you think is more powerful, we'll go with.

'So to create an emotional presentation

'we decided to write scenes showing families using the videophone.'

Some of it was going to be actors on stage.

In the other part we'd have actors on video that we pre-recorded.

So Mom should open with the history of the phone.

-So the open...

-With the details of it.

-..Is JR.

-It's seven-inch high-resolution digital screen phone.

-Right.

Even though Mom's not here today, she will be tomorrow.

My mom's role in this she's going to open the show with something funny

and then she's going to work the audience

in-between vignette changes.

I don't think there's anyone better to host our presentation than Joan Rivers.

-Good morning, Mom.

-Good morning.

-Let me let you talk to Claudia for a sec, OK?

-Anything you want.

Hey, Miss Joan. Maybe you can prepare, like, three minutes of material.

She's performing it. You know you'll be performing, right?

-Oh,

-now

-I know it.

-OK, I'm sorry.

Joan is flying in in the morning.

We need her, she's our point person. She'll give the presentation.

Joan's a pro, I really, really trust her comedic timing and her sense of what's funny.

-Thank you so much and we'll look for the e-mail.

-OK, I'll start working.

-OK.

-OK, goodbye, goodbye.

-ALL: Bye.

OK, let's get some clarity because half of us think we're doing a re-enactment, half think a video.

I want to ask a question. I kept getting confused.

So the baby and the mom is on tape but on the other end

is the dad on the stage or is he on video? So I can be clear.

I would like to be able to do the ones we can do live cos it's probably more impactful.

But I don't want to leave a family one out.

'I've been frustrated a lot in the brainstorm sessions

'cos it's just crazy.

'I thought the whole thing was going to be taped.'

Then it went to tape-then-live, all live.

It was just confusion so I had to go back and be like,

"OK, what are we doing again?"

While we're here, I just need to see what's on stage and what's on there.

Maybe it would be more impactful if they were, "I wish I could see..."

That whole vibe, "I wish I could see you." "No, no."

We started trying to brainstorm ideas, thinking of what we'd do and there was no structure

and we didn't really know what was going on.

We really needed Joan for this task.

She was going to do the opening. She'll do the comedy act.

We needed something to liven this act up

and she was the person to do it.

-Go and talk to her right now.

-OK. Damn it.

'So Melissa gets a phone call from Joan.'

Turns out that she will not be back in time for the presentation.

-I know, this is not good.

-What, her plane gets IN at 10:30?

-Yes.

She's good but I don't think anyone's that good.

So let's try to prepare for a Plan B, unfortunately.

Right now we're like the Patriots at the Superbowl without Tom Brady.

We have no quarterback right now. I'm going to stay calm.

So we left and headed over to West Point.

One thing that we want in our presentation,

we wanted it to be real.

So Jesse and me contacted someone up there that could get us in

and get us an opportunity to meet with some of the cadets and that's the way we started.

-Dennis, he's got a lot of problems.

-Oh, gee.

-But I smell a little fumes on him.

-Yeah.

How can he drink all the time?

'Dennis was a liability in the last task.'

If Dennis shows up,

I think the first thing Brian needs to do is talk to him.

He's got to evaluate him. If he feels that Dennis will be a liability,

he has to decide that he can't be here.

If he thinks Dennis is here to work, and be a part of the team,

he has to bring him back.

Poor Dennis, I think he has a lot of problems.

OK, now we have a quiet room, let's try to prepare for Plan B.

Let's get another comedian.

I don't want to replace Joan, I want her to do it.

This is a major presentation and Joan, who is my star,

is not going to make it back on time so we don't really know if

she's going to be up to speed by the time we go on stage.

Who knows? Stress!

When do you think she'll get done? At midnight?

I have a private plane.

They do my private travel on tour.

I need you to send a plane.

'I call them up and said, I need to get Joan Rivers from Dallas'

to New York at 10:30pm, can you help me?

They said, no problem. We're on it.

Thank you, Natalie, you're a hero.

ALL: Hi!

That's the kind of reaction I like to get

from a room full of women, this is perfect.

Don Junior's always a welcome sight

because I feel like he always has good things to say about us.

It's fun when he comes in the room. We like flirting with him.

The problem with you is you're making my job difficult.

I come here, everything is perfect. The men are a total disaster.

That throwdown today?

Clint is so small.

I missed it.

Let's re-enact it.

You're Dennis and I'm Clint.

'Brande and Tionne were re-enacting

'this morning's crazy drama when Dennis Rodman'

totally screamed on little Clint Black.

You think you're all that, you think this is about you!

You think you're all that!

I'm sick of this BLEEP!

You think you're better than me? You ain't BLEEP!

'The men's team is falling apart so for us to blow it'

against a team that is clearly a shambles...

We just can't blow this one.

So, what's going on?

-We're just going over some rehearsals.

-Very nice.

'They seem really loose, joking with me and having a good time.'

They really seem to be working together on it.

Play that beginning for me again.

You want that da-dic-a-da-dic-a-da?

No, give me that, that's what I want at the top.

The thing I sang to you.

Do this for me, give me the top of that with just the synths.

It's always fun to make music.

This was an opportunity for me to use my talent and get it done.

After four bars of that, give me the four on the floor with that.

Brian, a question from me.

You're making a track for when all this other stuff is going on

and you've already written it?

I've already written it.

Yeah?

-Cos... Huh?

-Yes. I just played it, just now.

All right. You want to bounce it off anyone, I'm happy to...

'I know Clint had some ideas,

'but Clint's show comes from a different place'

and I wasn't sure how many country music fans are going to be there.

It's not a democracy. It is a dictatorship.

Hey, Clint - call the choreographer, we need four dancers. Female.

You could even tell them what we need, musically.

I don't want to deal with that.

PHONE RINGS

-'This is Dan.'

-Dan, Clint Black.

-'Hey there.'

-You're helping us out with our presentation tomorrow.

-'That's right.'

-Hey, Clint - I need a motif.

-We need a motif.

-Just make a list.

-Sorry, Dan - we're just multi-tasking here.

'I think Brian utilised me'

for something that just about anyone can do.

I think just about any bonehead can make phone calls and line people up.

And so all I have to do in this task

is rise to the level of bonehead so far.

Now, uh...

-I need drums, bass, guitar.

-Hey Dan, hang on one second.

'I've produced one show after another for 20 years on tour,'

but I've been kind of kept in my little box, just making phone calls.

I need smoke machines, microphones, the lighting board and the lights...

and we will need stuff here today.

'It was a well-oiled machine for this particular task.'

I think finally everyone is learning how to take direction

from the leader and the leader is leading.

Two pizzas with extra cheese and sausage on them.

-Sausage and extra cheese, you've got it. Bye.

-There you go, buddy.

(Good Lord!)

Claudia, we're doing it this way.

We're also banking on a suspension of disbelief.

The whole idea is even if it doesn't logically makes sense and the guy walks in and says now,

the whole place is going to go (SHE GASPS).

And get caught up in the moment. The point is the emotional payoff.

My gut says...

I agree, but I also feel like we're taking away from the phone,

they'll be like what the BLEEP does that have anything to do with...

'I feel like we need to be a lot further along at this point.

'Our team is woefully behind.

I'm trying to get it done so we know

what we need to do and shoot and get some...

form to what we need to have ready for the presentation.

Here's what I came up with as the vignettes.

The first one is either, "Say goodnight, Daddy",

"baby steps" or a son recapping a game to his dad.

'I don't think Claudia was leading the team'

and I was getting crazy.

I don't mean to keep throwing out ideas, but don't tell me

till you can give it to me clearly and succinctly.

If I could say something as project manager?

I understand you produce a lot of things and I think that's why you're getting frustrated,

-cos it's not everything you want...

-No...

-Wait, wait, Melissa.

Every time we come close, you throw in something else and BLEEP.

-I'm not married to any of my ideas.

-I'm not trying to disrespect you...

I feel like I'm the one who has the hands-on technical experience.

'Oh, Melissa, Melissa, Melissa.'

She didn't even have to tell me

she was an only child to know that she is definitely one.

'She's a spoiled brat, we know this.

'Her job today, I'm sorry, it's not to be the boss.'

'I'm just getting a little frustrated, because we're all getting so ethereal,

-'other than what's realistic and we can pull off.'

-Here's the thing...

We got so far away from the skits and then you came in reading copy.

I'm sorry if I wrote too fast. I took the idea and ran with it.

You're too good.

'I had to like, put her in her place,

because we were trying to come up with a plan. She keeps talking - everyone's confused.

I saw the frustration on Chloe's face, Natalie's face... People are shaking their heads.

I felt like I was letting my team down.

So I had to stand up to Melissa and tell her basically,

"shut up, be quiet, hold on".

She did not like that one bit.

This is what I do for a living. This is what I DO.

And you really talked down to me...

-You think

-I

-talked down to YOU?

It was very, like... OK.

'Claudia was trying to completely cut me out.'

It felt so personal that I was shocked. Shocked.

-You attacked what I do for a living.

-I'm not attacking...

-That's what it felt like. Let's just stop now, because I just want to do my work.

-I want you to.

'I don't like her personality, I think she looks funny,'

she scares me - is she happy or sad or pissed off?

It's the same blank look in her eyes.

'The forehead doesn't move and... If Joan Rivers wasn't around,

'there would be no Melissa Rivers on television'

or producing or anything, and that's a fact.

I believe that he is going to pick it up and deliver it. All right.

Dan, let me just verify a little more info.

I just want to make sure I understand what all my costs are going to be.

Dan, can I call you back?

I play professional sports and you got to always help each other out,

no matter what the situation - good, bad, ugly, whatever.

You got to help them out, bro.

I'm trying to be a team player right now. I'm not that big an ass.

Yeah, I'm still working. I'm still on the team trying to help a brother.

-That bit I can put in, I put in.

-Hey, Brian?

We have a team member who returned and that's something

you'll have to figure out how to deal with.

He's a loose cannon. I'd rather he stay downstairs, or some place else.

In the NBA I was the one they always target,

but I didn't win six championships for no reason.

I'll go up there and do my thing,

if they want to use me, great,

if they don't, that's fine, too.

Hi, guys. How's it going, Brian? Everything going well?

Everything's going fine. I think because this is finally a task

that's a bit more on an even playing field.

Exciting things happening. Jesse's gone to film one thing, if we get that the right way...

-Hits home with everyone. It'll be awesome.

-And Herschel...

-Is with Jesse.

-OK. And that's it?

-I can't believe it.

-That's it.

But we don't have a baby sitter. I don't know what to do with that.

I'll go and ask him what his thoughts are.

Dennis, why are you over there?

Come over and join the group.

'The boys, they are several men down.'

I think Brian should humble himself to a certain degree

and say Dennis, look, we can use you, I don't like you but we need you

and we'd appreciate you to actively join this task.

-Go help your team.

-I offered earlier. He turned it back on me.

If they turn it back on me again, what do you want me to do?

Just sit here all day and do nothing?

Fair enough.

'If we lose this task, Brian can't blame it on me'

because when I came back

he took control of everything.

Good luck, hopefully you guys win. Take care.

I'm here as a team. So if anybody screwed this task up,

it's Brian, not Dennis Rodman.

-'This is Dan.'

-Dan, Clint Black. What's the cash amount?

'The cash amount is 4821.19.'

OK, hang on. Brian,

we're being hit with a bill for about 4,800.

-For?

-'Most of that is for the monitor system.'

-Yeah.

About 4,800.

I can get the monitors if you want them.

-For free?

-I can get them if you want them.

-OK, hang on.

Brian, when Dennis speaks,

-he'll provide all that stuff without charging us?

-Yep.

'I don't need the distraction.

'I didn't want him anywhere near here infecting our work site.'

I'm part of the team, I'm trying to help, brother,

so if you don't want to use my resources, fine.

If you go to a dictionary and look up drama

there is a picture of Dennis Rodman.

No definition necessary.

So I don't want Dennis here.

OK, this first piece, it's basically to show that this phone,

you can leave a video message.

So that's the first thing we have to film.

'So our team has decided'

to hire a production crew to shoot

part of the vignettes because it goes together

with what we'll be doing on stage.

BABY CRIES

So, as the saying goes in Hollywood,

never work with animals or babies.

So we're trying to get a kid to take two or three steps.

The clock is ticking, we don't have much time, and this kid is not co-operating.

I've already dealt with enough babies

and other words that begin with Bs on my team.

What's the matter?

'Oh my God, the room was chaos.

'The baby's screaming.'

And I'm just going, "What the hell is going on here?"

It was seriously like the seventh rung of hell! You know?

You want this? I'll be over here.

-Hey Khloe, why do you look stressed?

-I'm not stressed.

I felt at that point this is going to be an embarrassing disaster.

OK, we're done. We're done with him. Let them go. Thank you.

It took us the better part of two hours to get up to West Point.

This is my way of working,

we don't know what we're going to do today and then we're at West Point.

Making it happen.

We could've easily said, screw it,

I don't want to go all the way up to West Point to film

but we've been getting spanked by the girls so we needed to do something

they can't do, and I guarantee none of them chicks

could get on this military base like I did.

It's pretty nice.

'Once we got there it kind of sucked

'because the place is so amazing'

but we had no time to check it out.

-How you doing?

-How you doing?

-Jesse James, nice to meet you.

'Once we got there I picked the one dude out to be the star

'cos he was the best looking dude of the bunch.'

-"OK, you're an actor now."

-What do you think?

I think establishing the shot, he's at the angle.

-Here goes, guys.

-Right.

Hi. How's it going?

-Good to see you, too, how are you doing?

-Say, "I miss you".

-I miss you.

-Now say, "Why did you sleep with my best friend?"

Now you're saying, "Why are you having Tyrone's baby?"

This could either look really cool, or really dumb, you never know.

But, hey, US Military West Point Academy cadets?

-You can't go wrong with that.

-Did you enjoy it?

Clint, find out what's the biggest image we can project on the screen.

All right.

'We certainly could have used a fifth man'

but we needed a fifth man who was going to be productive

so I decided I'll just start prodding at him.

-What happened, Dennis? Where did we go wrong?

-Doesn't even matter, buddy.

-I don't know where we went wrong.

-A guy had a bad day

and he took it out on somebody. So what, that's it.

-Simple as that. You know?

-You still taking me out to gay bars?

I'll take you anywhere you want to go, anywhere you want to go, bro!

'Dennis is kind of aloof but Dennis has a lot to offer'

and even if Dennis is making big mistakes

he can still pull a rabbit out of a hat.

Hey, it's Brande, I just want to let you know that we are on our way, OK?

So Brande and Tina, my homegirls, we're on our way to

the editing room, and Annie and Melissa and Khloe and Natalie

all went back to the space with the actors and the dancers.

They were going to run through it,

cos we have a taped out area on the stage.

'I cannot take any more of her little smug comments.'

"Guys, guys, I have 15 years experience of this. Guys, guys!"

-Why are you doing that?

-That's how she BLEEP talks,

she doesn't move her bottom lip.

'OK, I'm really not that good at impressions

'but I think I got Melissa Rivers down.'

The eyes, nice and tight.

"Guys, guys, guys, guys."

She talks out of the side of her mouth, "Guys, guys, guys."

"Guys!"

"Guys." She never blinks either, did you notice that?

What the BLEEP is wrong with her? She never blinks.

She's like a ventriloquist, she never moves her mouth. "Guys."

You got me going there!

THEY CACKLE

So let's clear the chairs if you guys don't mind.

What happens is duh-duh-duh-du, 17 seconds. Joan, ta-dah!

Ladies, you are dismissed, then we have a two-minute monologue.

'Annie, Khloe, Natalie and myself wanted to walk through the show

'with the choreographer so that he can work'

with his dancers in the morning to get them tight and sharp.

The lights are going to drop.

MUSIC PLAYS

-And down.

-OK, good, that's ten seconds.

The first part dancing is incredible.

'We really needed Melissa back on the task'

because she has all the experience at producing performances.

Khloe, don't you see how it flows better?

It's because of Melissa.

Thank God.

I am just working my ass off and doing the best

I can with what I'm allowed to do.

And you are, you're fine.

But I know I'm going to get attacked and it's just very, very hard

to stay motivated when you know that someone's going to attack you.

'Through this whole process I knew that

'I was going to get on that stage by myself.'

Once I got on stage whatever else didn't matter.

I knew I could have those people in the palm of my hand.

-Is this the dance floor for the dancers?

-No.

-The dancers will be up here.

-Is this everything?

'I'm 30 years in the entertainment business'

and I haven't been asked my opinion on any of the creative stuff.

I really do want to win,

but I really can't put myself into areas that I'm not asked about.

I'll see you all in the morning. I appreciate it.

Then I realised that I guess I'm fortunate

because I'm kind of enjoying my great lack of responsibilities.

It is now 4.40am,

I have just performed in Dallas this evening,

I got off stage at 11pm,

we got into the airport at 12, and here we are.

I'm going to be very cranky.

-I'm going to be...

-SHE LAUGHS

..so bitchy.

Hi.

My mom has cue cards.

As long as you stand next to him, you're a unit.

Gorgeous.

This morning we got to Capitale

and I really didn't know Joan Rivers had made it back to New York.

When I saw her there, I was like, OK, this is going to be OK.

Joan Rivers, she's my ace in the hole.

One, two, one, two.

-Tell me when you're ready, Toni.

-Ready, Joan?

I don't know which Greek philosopher said

that one picture speaks a thousand words,

but now thanks to the very new and very wonderful...

NOT YET!

That's the video.

And now I say...

FEEDBACK ON MICROPHONE

That's not good.

Nothing we can do.

Of the hour we had, it took us about 45 minutes

to get through the fricking thing once.

The feedback alone was just like, yeoooooow!

You know, in your ear and, oh!

Hi, sweetheart, it's me.

Cue actor.

Cue actor! Actor!

-ACTOR!

-Come on, say something.

'That rehearsal was a nightmare.

'Claudia had to take control'

because that was going nowhere and it was never going to go anywhere

unless someone made sure that the chaos got under control.

I'm just nervous having seen the show.

Right now, the problems are the technical problems. That's them.

I just wish it was simpler, I wish the show were simpler.

It's really complicated,

there's lots of things to go wrong.

I was just like, oh, my God, this is a disaster.

OK, positions, please.

At the end, everyone on stage, even the actors.

Let's go, let's go, let's go!

'It's so confusing, there's so many different things happening.

'It's hard to keep up.

'I think our eyes are bigger than our stomach.'

We have many amazing ideas

with such a short amount of time to put them in.

So we should take that furniture off at the start

and have the dancers just on the stage.

-Yes.

-I don't think it makes sense.

-Yes.

-Is that what we're doing?

I don't know, but you're right.

That's why I sat down.

I really couldn't care less at this point.

'It's frustrating to work with someone like Khloe, because as task manager,

'sure you're responsible for the task,'

not micro-managing grown women.

If we were all like Khloe, we'd get nothing done

and we wouldn't have won three in a row.

Everybody in positions, please.

18 minutes until we go on, everybody, 18 minutes.

Everyone's like this, happy happy, you all line up...

And take your bow, and then I say...

-..And then everyone leaves, you take your last bow and goodbye.

-OK.

'We were very sceptical about'

how this was going to turn out, none of us had much hope at all,

and then something amazing happened.

Melissa put on her producing hat and started directing

and it started getting exciting.

I truly thought that we had a shot at this.

OK, guys, let's do it.

MUSIC

And, Mum, you clear yourself. Did it look OK from the front?

-It looks great.

-OK, because I only have this much cord,

-so I can't see.

-No, it's good.

'Melissa was good as a stage director,'

she loves being bossy, and why not use her strongest quality?

Creatively, no, not so much,

but telling people what to do? That's all Melissa.

Does everyone know where they're supposed to be and when - can I breathe?

Can I get my stage people to reset for number one? Thank you.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Recently a friend of mine came up to see me, and he wanted to know,

"How do you stand there and speak to tens of thousands of people?"

And I said, "I hate the question, because I don't think about it,

"cos all it's going to do is make you a nervous wreck."

Now, Claudia and Brian, when they get up in front of ACN,

they know what they're doing, they're performers.

Actually, they're great performers, they're not even thinking about it.

-Everybody in position.

-I need my mic.

Everybody in position, on my side of the stage?

Thank you, very much, thank you.

Sit down, everybody. OK, here's the story -

we have a men's team and a women's team,

and what I want you to do is pick the presentation

that you like better for the ACN videophone,

and you're going to vote at the end,

and you're going to determine which team wins and which team loses.

Then I'm going to take the team that loses

and fire the ass off somebody, OK?

Have a good time, everybody, thank you.

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Live, from the Ballroom Capitale,

Joan Rivers!

APPLAUSE

Hello, everybody, it's wonderful to meet you.

CHEERING

Fabulous, fabulous, fabulous.

I am privileged to stand here today and say thank you

to ACN for their new Iris 3000 videophone, it is so terrific!

CHEERING

It's a great phone, it's easy, it's terrific,

and we're going to show you what real people think about it,

so watch this first vignette -

real people, with a real, wonderful videophone at last.

Come here, baby.

Let's call Daddy, let's call Daddy.

'The first vignette was Baby Steps,

'and we had a pre-tape to make it a little bit easier.'

Let's go call Daddy.

'We showed a regular mum playing at home with the baby'

and wanting to share baby's first steps with the dad,

he's out of town on business.

-Oh, my God, he's so beautiful!

-Say hi.

'It was cute, the baby messing up the phone, it made it endearing.'

I love you, bye! I've got to go.

OK, isn't that nice? Wait till he finds out it's not his kid.

But nonetheless...

That'll be another phone call in video.

'Joan Rivers is a true professional.'

If our team wins I owe a lot to Joan Rivers.

It has truly changed my life.

Let me just tell you, I am so non-techy,

but now because of you,

I can never ever again have to go to the gynaecologist -

do you know how wonderful that is?

LAUGHTER

He can examine me over the damn phone, I mean, this is fabulous!

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

And seriously, let me tell you, I am so thrilled from now on

when I speak to people they can see my face -

I have spent 150,000 on this face.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

But, you know something?

Even if you've spent nothing on your face,

there's always someone that wants to see that face.

Watch this.

'I love Joan, she's rad, but you know,'

that presentation needed to

'get people's attention. I just don't see it happening.'

Hi, sweetheart, I need to talk to you right now,

so I've got a car downstairs for you, and I need you to get in it

and go wherever it takes you.

'We had a really dramatic scene with Brande getting

'a message from her boyfriend,'

"I need to see you now,"

and she's not knowing if it's good or bad.

'The video ended with her being right in the audience.'

Hi, surprise, sweetheart.

What is going on?

I don't want to spend another minute without you.

I know this is a shock and not how I planned it originally,

but I figured it's a perfect time.

Will you make me the happiest man in the world and be my wife?

Yes! Yes!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

When our actor went to propose to Brande, I heard the audience erupt,

and the reaction

was all I needed to see to know that we nailed this.

CHEERING

Congratulations! Oh, that's so fabulous!

A Greek philosopher once said that one picture is worth 1,000 words.

Well now, thanks to the new Iris 3000,

that picture is worth a million words.

Come on up, everybody!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

'After the stage show I was like, "We won, period."

'Like, I don't know what the boys could do to beat that.'

What are they going to pull out of their ass to beat Joan Rivers?

-Killed it.

-Great, great.

I know Melissa's probably going to take all the credit

for the success of this, she was good with managing the time,

but vision, any of that stuff - not her.

Perfect.

We have a ten-minute presentation to give to almost 500 sales associates

so we do our objective which is to give a demonstration

of the product, to get them excited about it.

I need it black to begin. OK, here we go.

TECHNO MUSIC

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE.

That's absolutely an advantage of going second.

When you go second, you're the last impression.

It's always best to close the show.

Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. I'm Clint Black.

Welcome to a very special event. The ACN videophone

is bringing our worlds together!

To me, to serve in the military is to express my patriotism

for my country and how proud I am to be an American.

This product will allow me to not only hear my family and friends

-but also see them up close and personal.

-Hi, baby.

I think the video looked pretty good.

For less than 24 hours, to crank out something like that, edit it,

we got it done and I think it's cool.

I'll talk to you later. I love you.

My name is cadet captain Rich Kubu, I'm from Brookville, Maryland.

Keep it going, everybody. Welcome to the stage Mr Brian McKnight!

Are you ready for the future?!

If you're ready for the future, say yeah!

My name is Brian McKnight and I am so proud to be here with you today.

'This is what I do, I get on stage every night

'so I'm going to get up and be Brian McKnight today'

for the first time I've been here.

Are you ready to get down?

Woah! Come on!

# Every time we're close

# Feels like I'm burning with desire

# Feels like you've set my soul on fire. #

I was in the crowd doing the presentation with the audience

and they thoroughly enjoyed it because they got into it right away.

# Baby you got what I want Baby, you got what I need

# Baby it's all I've been waiting for, for sure... #

I've never bought a Brian McKnight album but that was pretty awesome.

I think Brian hit it out of the park today.

Up there on the stage pumping that crowd up, how can you not like that?

# Please believe me

# I've never felt nothin' like

# When you're lovin' me... #

My point of view? I think Brian thinks

this is an opportunity to sell records, and make him shine now.

That's what I think. I've nothing to do with it.

Brian thinks that he's Quincy Jones, so knock yourself out!

# When you're lovin' me. #

Thank you so much. Everybody!

Come on now, put your hands in the air.

Come on now. Everybody now.

I think the men's team staged an incredible concert.

I think our show had more emotion and more heart and was real.

I'm not sure if dancing around

and going like this at the phone is selling the product.

I give to you ACN videophones. God bless you.

We pumped them up for their company

so much that they chanted their company's three letters.

That's pretty good, I think.

CHEERING

Boy! They have a tough call to make, don't they?

The second one has excitement, which is the music.

The beginning of it was really bold.

If they took Joan's presentation instead of the stage vignette,

put in the real video from the other one,

it would make hers look more professional and then hers would've been perfect.

A tough choice.

MUSIC BUILDS

-Claudia, how do you think you did?

-I think we did a good job.

-Do you think you won?

-I certainly hope so, especially today.

Why do you think you won?

Well, I feel that the point was made that it was important to evoke some kind of emotion

and I feel like we did that in our presentation.

-Brian, how do you think your team did?

-I thought we did great.

-Really great.

-You think you won?

-I think we won.

-You sure? You've been getting trounced, right, by the women?

-We have.

We've gotten our asses handed to us every time.

But, I think, this time...

-Did you work as a team?

-Most of us.

What does that mean?

Something happened yesterday with Dennis and Clint.

-I'm not sure what it was.

-Clint?

You know, I tried to reach out an olive branch to Dennis.

Just be playful and let him know that I'm not taking that stuff seriously.

Whatever he had going on toward me wasn't going to stick with me

and make any difference on how I treated him.

Did it work? Did you and Dennis bond a bit?

I think Dennis and I are going to hit the gay bars again, yeah.

MUTED LAUGHTER

I'm not sure about this. Now, Dennis. How did you get along with Clint?

Easy. I told him, we're going to be friends no matter what, brother.

-How do you get along with Brian?

-I get along with Brian.

-I heard you didn't.

Or I heard Brian didn't want to use you. At all.

-I don't know why.

-Why didn't you want to use Dennis, Brian?

Once Dennis got confrontational with Clint yesterday morning,

we don't have enough people to have a babysitter for Dennis. I needed everybody to do the task.

-You actually think he needs a babysitter?

-Sometimes, yes.

Brian, what was the origin of the original conflict?

-Why did Denis walk away to begin with?

-I have no idea.

When the coin toss happened and Annie and Clint were there,

the next thing I know Dennis's hands were in Clint's face

and he was violating Clint's personal space, almost to the point where they were about to fight.

-I don't think Clint was worried, were you?

-I almost got on a chair and decked him, I have to say.

What was the origin of that, though?

What specifically did you do to Dennis or vice versa to cause the outburst?

-Dennis will have to explain it.

-Dennis, explain it. What happened?

It was nothing. You know me as well as anybody, Donald.

I never fought anybody at NBA. Never. Never laid a hand on anybody at NBA.

Do I get along well with people? Very, very well. I think my record shows that.

Clint, if your team lost, who's to blame?

-that's a good question.

-That's why I asked it!

-Yeah. It's...

I don't have a great answer, but...

-Dennis is raising his hand.

-I think... Oh.

-Go ahead, Dennis.

-If you don't have a great answer, we don't want to hear it.

-Mediocre.

-Good. Dennis.

If we lost this whole task, you know what?

Everyone is going to see that they going to point it at me.

-Guess what? I wasn't involved.

-No, no.

You have such a persecution complex. Nobody is pointing at you.

I just asked a question.

-Let's go back to Clint.

-All right.

-Who's to blame?

I think that Brian really took command of where this presentation was going.

-He delegated.

-For better or worse.

-For better or worse, he delegated.

OK, so you'd blame Brian as well as give him credit.

I don't think I'd blame Brian, I think Brian would take responsibility for the task.

-You think that's true, Brian?

-Absolutely.

-If you lost, should I fire you?

-Absolutely.

-Not Dennis because he was a little difficult?

-It was my decision not to involve Dennis.

-OK.

That's brave, but obviously you think you won so you're not worried about it. Herschel?

What do you think of the team?

I think the team came together.

You may be the only one who could take Dennis in a fight. You know that, Herschel?

-I never worry about it.

-You're a pretty tough cookie.

-I don't know, Jesse is looking up.

-I'll fight him right now.

-What do you think?

-Do you think you could handle him?

-Hell, yeah. I know his weak spot.

-OK. Who was the star of your team, Claudia?

-Joan Rivers.

-Do you think?

She wasn't around for much of the brainstorming but she just got it immediately.

-I had no worries about her being able to perform.

-And I heard Melissa

was very strong and talented in many ways also.

She has experience in this field so she has some strong opinions.

-Was she fully utilised in the right capacity given that's what she does for a living?

-I think she was.

Melissa, what do you have to say?

I don't think I was fully utilised in that capacity.

I have 15 years of experience doing this

and, not taking anything away from Claudia,

but sometimes you have to say, "you know what you're doing, you organise it, you go,

"and you oversee everything."

-Annie. What do you think?

-It was total chaos. Definitely the most chaotic task that we've done.

If you lose, whose fault is it?

Given how incredibly chaotic the room was,

I would have to say that, in this case, it would be the project manager.

Claudia, how do you respond?

I expect this because the way I thought would make this more harmonious,

which I think is important in our team which is why we've been winning,

was to keep the temperament good.

-So, who was your biggest problem?

-Melissa.

I feel like there's two ways of looking at it.

You can look at Melissa and say she's a good leader

-or you say she was out of bounds.

-Can I just say something?

Let me finish.

Did I not come back immediately and say to you, I've been out of bounds, I am sorry,

and say, "You are my executive producer and I will do everything you ask me to do 100%."

I completely rolled over and said, lead me.

-Just like when we were trying to get things done, it's this kind of jumping in.

-She's a strong person.

-She is. And I give her props.

-It would be hard for you to produce a weak child, don't you think?

-Go ahead.

-I feel like every time I went to tell her something, she cannot take criticism at all.

-You tell her something and it's like she's not even listening.

-Oh my God! Claudia!

-She goes and tells...

-This is so... Such bull BLEEP.

It's not because she is my child,

I'm being very honest. The weakest link in this group is Claudia.

Claudia is a musher.

She's not direct, she doesn't take hold, she doesn't get what's important at the moment.

That's what a leader has to do.

She's a very nice girl. She's mushy. She spent the day...

-Joan, no disrespect but you weren't there yesterday.

-I'm talking about today.

-Somebody had to get the show on its feet.

-Let me talk.

Claudia, who called the show? Melissa.

Who got the things going? Melissa.

Who told everybody, we have to take the timing? Melissa.

Who lined the BLEEP show up and did it? Melissa.

She became the stage manager.

Melissa is good with technical things. That's the only way... OK. I need to say something.

I wrote the whole freaking show, basically.

Can I speak? This is how it was!

-Dennis, do you believe this? Do you believe this?

-Yes, I do.

I've been waiting for it.

Can I say one thing?

-It's sort of fun, Dennis, isn't it?

-I love it, baby.

-Natalie, do you think the team won?

-I don't know.

I think we won. Can I just say that? I think we won.

-Why?

-I thought it was fantastic.

If you didn't win, your husband is going to be damned pissed off at you. Was that an actor?

-Yes, I hired a cute boy to play my husband.

-He gave you a pretty hard kiss, didn't he?

That's OK with me.

-Your husband is not going to like what he saw.

-Sorry, honey.

I saw those lips lock and you looked like you were enjoying it.

Ivanka, what were some of the comments made about the teams?

These are some of the comments from the sales force at ACN about the boys' team.

"Hot girls dancing with our videophones. Nuff said."

Another comment was, "Brian McKnight, need I say more?"

A third comment was, "second presentation rocked."

What did you hear?

The men were very entertaining but they didn't focus enough on the product.

They couldn't tell what the men were selling.

"Joan was funny, engaging and had several examples of the video in use."

"Not shocked at all." Another, "Joan Rivers is awesome!"

That's nice.

OK. Are you ready?

Yes.

The people that watched you, a large audience,

voted almost 85% in favour of one team.

So it wasn't even close. Wasn't even close.

The men absolutely easily defeated the women.

They were great. I watched the presentations.

You were great, Brian. The whole team was terrific

so, the men were really outstanding.

And Brian, as you know, for your charity, what is your charity?

It's YouthBuild USA.

It's an agency that puts kids into group homes and foster care.

-Well, that sounds great and you're getting 20,000, OK?

-OK.

Go to your suite at Trump Tower.

And, if you want, you can watch what's going to happen.

MAN MIAOWS

Sadly, somebody's going to be fired.

Too much!

I'm going to pop open some champagne on our first win

after three weeks of this losing.

I knew, when I saw how many women

were in that audience, I had them right here, baby!

'This week our team won the task and I get money for my charity,'

which is YouthBuild USA.

They provide foster care.

The kids we've helped in the past are adults.

They'd have different lives, if not for this programme.

So it's great to have a hand in the life of a young person.

I'll drink to that!

-Can we turn the volume up?

-This will be funny.

So, to be specific, the numbers were 386 to 61, Claudia.

-It's pretty big.

-It's horrible.

-That's a big difference.

You know, it's tough when it's close

and you really don't have a winner but have to pick a winner.

This one wasn't close and the men did a fantastic job

but with Clint and with Brian...

I don't know, maybe they had an advantage, but they were fantastic.

I thought that with Clint and Brian you have veteran performers

who have mounted large-scale multimedia performances before.

-They had working knowledge at their fingertips.

-Yes. They were great.

-We had a pro director, baby!

-Ha!

They were at a gross disadvantage this time. I'm just saying!

There was only four of us but we had Brian McKnight.

-So, are you surprised, Annie?

-This morning I was 100% sure we'd lose.

When I saw how great Joan was I became much less sure

and thought we had a chance to win.

The thing is that,

as much as I didn't have much to do with the production,

I felt it was getting scattered

because these vignettes were just too much to get a focus.

They had lost the concept that it was a product launch, in the end.

The vignettes were so cheesy!

All the comments reinforced this idea that the vignettes were boring

but Joan was phenomenal.

Whose idea was it to do a vignette, as opposed to a film as the men did?

We were all kind of on the same page about that.

Tionne, do you take responsibility for this,

in that the two great singers on the men's team helped

and you're a great singer and you lost? Do you take any responsibility for this loss?

If it was about putting up a concert, I would have loved to.

I thought it was more concentrating on the emotion.

I love your music. It's great.

Claudia, why didn't you have Tionne sing?

Because we thought the focus should be on creating something

people could relate to in the audience. So the vignettes were a reflection of that.

Each and every person could take away something from that.

What did you think of it, Melissa?

I was so removed from the creative process...

not by choice.

And, trying to be the good soldier, I stopped voicing opinions

on the creative end of it

and just tried to technically get something on its feet

and I got it moving and I got the lights up and got everyone

from point A to point B.

Honestly, the day started off

so unorganised but after Claudia and Melissa had their dispute,

Melissa really tried to watch her boundaries

and that's really hard for Melissa, who's been in this business so long.

Everyone was stressed out.

It sucks to lose, doesn't it?

They were all happy, loving each other, blah, blah, blah!

-It's not fun.

-Let me ask you.

You have very strong women at the table.

Who is the toughest of the women at the table? Annie, what do you think?

-You can pick between Joan, Melissa and me.

-You think?

And what about the rest?

Um...I take tough to be something different than a strong player.

-I'm not saying it in a bad sense.

-No, I know.

-I'm saying strong people.

I think that Natalie is quietly an incredibly strong player as well.

Absolutely.

I think there are people who believe in what they do

and can bring it behind it

and who believe they can do something and aren't bringing it.

And, honestly, I would put Claudia in that category.

I think she feels a stronger player than she was and the chaos

that developed was great evidence of that. She could not take control of anyone in the room.

Melissa really wanted to help and I sat by her today and she did an amazing job.

Was Melissa obnoxious, or was she...?

I can't say about the early part of the day.

There was obnoxiousness on both sides, to be honest.

But she really did put her head down.

If you could have seen her by the stage during rehearsals,

trying to pull this disaster together into something...

-So you give Melissa a lot of positive credit?

-Absolutely.

I felt she put her head down and just wanted to make it work

and did an amazing job. Had we won,

I would have given equal credit to Joan and Melissa for winning.

Claudia, in retrospect, what would you have done different

and what triggered this disharmony?

Well, that's clearly a personality clash between Melissa and I.

Do you think you mishandled it?

I probably should have stood up to her more but she's very,

very, very loud and very obnoxious.

And I feel like I can't finish a thought.

I am not discounting her talent. I am not.

She has told me many times she's a producer. It's just that...

-Can I step in?

-No, let me finish. Let me finish, please!

This is exactly how it is and, you know,

as project manager there is only so much I can do. I can't whip her. Slavery's over.

But she will not listen.

And I feel it's because she doesn't like me and that's the thing.

Do you not like her, Melissa?

I really do like Claudia.

No, you don't. Very sarcastic too.

And it's like I felt like I was kissing your ass extra,

so I could make it peaceful.

As for producing, I call myself a producer...

This is why I got upset - because it became a personal attack.

I'm sorry you think I'm obnoxious.

-My humour is sarcastic.

-Me too.

-I understood it.

I am sorry you think I do not like you. I cover things with sarcasm.

For that, if I've been misinterpreted, I am sorry.

I do like you. That's number one.

Number two, comments like, "She says she's a producer".

Let me just start with, did you ever watch those big two-hour

red-carpet extravaganzas in the last 12 years?

-Not too many.

-OK. I did produce those.

-Congratulations(!)

-So I do have a legitimate resume.

-OK, but no-one need hear that.

Claudia, you just said, "You claim to be a producer."

I have no choice but to say, here's what I do.

This is some bull BLEEP. I'm not the only one to have problems with Melissa, OK?

-Then speak up.

-No-one's going to cos no-one wants to go home.

-It's easy to put it on me.

-Is it only Melissa?

The only person you've faulted is Melissa. A lot of people think she's doing a good job.

But then why didn't Melissa step up to be the project manager?

That's what I said. They elected the project manager, so speak up.

So is there any other person here

that you think is somewhat responsible for the loss?

From a creative standpoint,

listening to the comments of the salespeople

who are judging you on this task? Or is it only Melissa?

I'm not putting it on Melissa.

I'm just saying her attitude caused us... The conflict was between us.

You seem to take the emotional side,

that you don't like her, as opposed to her effectiveness on the task.

Who was the least effective person in the group, or people?

Again, it seems everyone is backing up Melissa. It's what she does.