Episode 6 The Graham Norton Show

On tonight's show, all the ingredients for a perfect line-up:

The amazingly talented star of the new film "Burnt"?

Good. Oh, and a charismatic, debonair and hilarious host?

Is everyone excited about Hallowe'en?

Have you all got your pumpkins carved and your costumes ready?

But, ladies and gentlemen, no tricks tonight, just treats.

We've got a really fantastic line-up for you.

Later we'll have music from the one and only Mr Justin Bieber!

And before that, how fantastic is this?

Making her first appearance on a British chat show in 42 years

Yes, her last British chat show was 1973 - you weren't even born.

You should have seen her face when she heard she was coming

Dame Maggie will be talking about her new film, The Lady In The Van

She's the home-grown actress whose Hollywood star has risen with her

recent performances in Foxcatcher, and American Sniper.

Now starring in the new kitchen drama Burnt,

CHEERING. Hello! Wow! You won an Oscar. You look beautiful. Lovely to

see you. And he's the breakout star

of the Hangover movies, who has since received three Oscar

nominations in a row for Silver Linings Playbook, American

Hustle, and American Sniper. It's a warm welcome back to

Bradley Cooper! CHEERING. Yay! Hello. How you doing?

That's a pretty couch isn't it? Quite comfy. Sienna Miller looks

like an Oscar. Very sparkly. Old ugly corner over here. We were

talking about the first time I was on here. She has never been on this

show before. It is a unique environment, because you are very

vulnerable. I feel quite shy. I remember the first time I was on.

Liam Neeson was late and we were on for an hour-and-a-half. What was he

doing? He was coming from... We'll talk about Burnt more,

but one of the things that struck me For you, Sienna, is it's nice to

kind of be filming in London? When you were filming in London

before, people were taking pictures, paparazzi, but you don't really

have that so much any more. How did the shutters come down

on that? I secretly filmed them

on what looks like a lighter but was actually a camera for about

two years, it was proper spy stuff. And, yeah, basically built up a case

and took it to court and got an injunction, so it's illegal for them

to follow or sit outside the house. If you're coming out

of somewhere like a premiere, you I have to say real quick, so,

she told me this and I was doing The Elephant Man,

and sometimes paparazzi would follow They had a camera at the side of the

place I was staying, and another The guy who I drive with, George,

his uncle, who is a black cab driver, came and we had a whole

thing, we were going to get them. No-one followed us.

Nothing. Nothing!

Absolutely nothing. LAUGHTER. I was going to say,

you do get bothered in the States. Not that much, you know,

it's not that bad. It's more

in Europe, sometimes you go There was

an unfortunate paparazzi shot. The thing is, you have a sixth sense

of when you're getting captured. This was a couple of years ago, but

I do remember being outside. I had this little house in Venice,

the front door just opened right to I was putting my dog, I think,

in the back of You could hear the click,

just hear it. I thought, oh yeah,

these pants are really tight, And then, like, you go online

and bam, they've got it! In fairness, they did,

we've got it there. APPLAUSE. Burnt opens next Friday,

6th. This movie is about a chef. It is the first film I've seen that

really captures that stress and how thrilling it is to be in a proper

kitchen, a proper catering kitchen. Good, we tried to do that. In this

you are a former wild child who's trying to redeem himself? Yes, it's

a guy who had a lot of success early on in Paris, a young chef. Blew it

up, and you meet him. He had a self-imposed penance in New Orleans

where he wanted to chuck oysters to clear his head. OK! I worked in

kitchens and I know you have experience. The pressure is just

like nothing else. But this level, this two Michelin star I've never

experienced. We've got to train with some amazing chefs. You play the

protege? A sous chef, yes. But better than that. Well, I think so,

but technically yes, a sous chef with an interesting haircut. I

begged her to do the movie. We were doing American sniper. I begged her

to do it and she showed up on set the first day the back of her head

shaved and tattoos. If you see the movie, she's unbelievable. You are

both great in it. Thank you. You were incredible. ? Thank you, so is

he. The training, is it a skill you learn so that you can do it in that

moment, or can you now recreate that food in your house? A lot of things

go in and out for me. You train a lot, you can do it for that time and

then it's gone. What about you? I can cook fish really well, because I

think I cooked 500 pieces of it before filming. That stayed. I was

taught to fillet a turbot, which seems inane, but it is like a ryes

no Ross that's been squashed, like leather. I went to the farmer's

market and asked for a whole tur bet. It cost a fortune. I just

hacked at it. It was awful. Got the kitchen scissors out. My child

started crying. I was like, shut up! We were really doing it in a

functioning kitchen and all the other people were chefs in

Michelin-starred restaurants. We would do 25 minute takes. It was

crazy. I do remember, there was one scene where I'm doing grouse. I was

leaning up against it and I thought I am OK with stuff. I thought I was

going to faint. I was going to pass out. When you cut the head off?

Yeah, and I remember, and I stayed aft because I wanted to make sure

there were no close-ups that weren't my hands. It was like a big deal. It

takes time because I'm not a real chef. I thought, oh my God I'm going

to pass out, the whole day is going to be gone. I was leaning and I had

to be as close as I could. My hand started shaking. It was really

intense. It's crazy what they do. It is a bit like the fashion world. You

really got a sense of it. I had to stand up for that. You trained as a

mime? That was pretty incredible. I saw the grouse.

LAUGHTER. Listen, let's watch a clip from Burnt. This is you both in the

kitchen discussing your philosophy of food. Cooking is an express of

what, tell me? At its best, of sustaining someone, of love. Aal

Jones of Ed the Langham is one of the most interesting places. What do

you like, one of or interesting? We should be dealing in culinary other

gasles. Aling in culinary other gasles. When was -- orgasms. Remind

me never to discuss food with you in public. I want to make food that

people stop eating. You're being stupid. Cooking is an expression of

who we are. We are two stars, this is a two-star review. I want people

to sit that the table and be sick with longing and I need you to do it

with me. APPLAUSE. Bradley Cooper and little

Lord Fauntleroy. I heard you talking of restaurant etiquette that none of

us would have thought of. In a Michelin restaurant food can only

sit on the pass for two minutes. Longer than that and they throw it

away. If you have your starter and some asshole goes off for a wee,

they have to start again. It is a real juggling act. You don't even

consider it. You can't smoke in restaurants anywhere, which is a

nightmare for the kitchen, because people are constantly going up. What

I think is worst is when the food arrives and they say, I'm just going

to the toilet, like they are making room.

LAUGHTER. They look at themselves... Back in a minute! I can gauge it

now. I wasn't sure what I was getting. Oh my God. The thing I want

to know, is it true the thing in the film, or are we allowed to say this?

Say it. About how you can spot the inspectors? It is more crazy than

that. The fork is maybe a little general, but in certain kitchens

they have mugshots, all these photos of people they think are part of the

Michelin guide, so they are constantly looking out. It is

unbelievable the depths they go to. It is hard for them to know. It is

harder in America but in yomp it is easier. Is it the same guys in

Europe? There's 40 or 50 of them, I kind of made that number up. It felt

right. I believed you. Putting the fork under the table, explain that

to that. The fork under the table to see if anybody notices it. They

don't drop the fork? Though, they place it. They'll see if you notice

there's a missing fork. Wow! Don't try that at Nando's. We've all...

What a Nando's? I want a Nando's bro. You don't have it in America?

You would love it. What is it? A lot of chicken. A chicken place? Chicken

done several ways. That can be on their poster, Sienna Miller, it's

like chicken. Were you a waitress? I was for a

day, it didn't go well, I had several very short-term jobs. Some

man was inappropriate and I accidentally on purpose but passed

on his lap. Don't mess with CNN. That was good. Did he walk out? It

didn't work. -- don't mess with CNN Vela -- Sienna. I was a prep cook

between high school and college at an Italian place. Through college I

was a horrible way to. Genuinely bad or did you hate it? I was back, the

guy who hired me was a friend, he said, Bradley, you are literally the

worst waiter I've ever seen. But you have sad eyes, I will keep you.

LAUGHTER You know what? It's so funny, I'm

still friends with him, he's the manager of this restaurant in

Washington, DC, I see him all the time. Indie film you speak French.

And you speak French as well. He can speak fluent French. I speak one

line of French. Didn't you study there? I did, spring semester of my

junior year of college I went to the south and studied there. How would

you urge people to see the film, Burnt, in French? That was good!

CHEERING Why wouldn't you? Brulee. Hole I

like Brulee, they should do that instead.

The other thing is and we last saw you, you took the most famous selfie

in the world, at the Oscars. By mistake. It wasn't planned, I was

actually trying to... I completely messed up talented generous's joke,

she was trying to make a joke about her and Meryl Streep, that she

couldn't take a selfie with Meryl Streep. I thought, something is

wrong. -- Ellen de Generes. Due was like, Bradley, as got it. She's

constantly saying, it's OK. And then she made this goal, she said,

everybody start coming behind her. She started taking it. I was there,

my arm was longer, took over, I was like, I've got it. Here it is. Who

is that? That you didn't quite get? I think it's Jarrod O. Angelina

Jolie didn't get the concept, you have to be able to see yourself. --

Jared Leto. It's like something out of Harry Potter. The evil beast.

Yeah. I wish I knew his name, this guy. It was so sweet, you thought,

I'll do it. Look how much space he has come of the most real estate.

Poor Meryl Streep, she's hardly... Belly I love Kevin 's busy. Perfect.

-- I love Kevin Spacey. I've found my space and my light. The whole

selfie thing, that was the most famous. Now they are everywhere,

everybody takes selfies. There is a new sort of selfie.

Are you aware of this thing, nutscaping?

What you do is, you're oot and aboot and you see just a wonder

You basically, you drop your testicles into the picture.

LAUGHTER. A picture... paints a thousand words.

LAUGHTER. There's something wrong with that nut.

What do we know? We're cows.

This one is beautiful, it's incredibly artistic.

Listen, it's been absolutely lovely talking to you. Both of you. Good

luck with the movie Burnt, it opens next Friday. Thank Sienna Miller and

Bradley Cooper! One is a multi-award-winning actor

who gave us his Prince Charles The other is possibly this country's

most treasured actress, a double Oscar winner and the main reason

the world loves Downton Abbey. They're currently starring together

in the big screen adaptation of Alan Bennett's The Lady in

the Van - here they are in action. In your drive? That never occurred

to me. I don't know, it might not be convenient. I thought it over,

believe me, Miss Shepherd, it's all right, just till you sort yourself

out. Not convenient for you, convenient for me. You're not doing

me a favour, you know, I have other fish to fry. A man on the pavements

told me if I went south of the river I'd be welcomed with open arms.

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Alex Jennings and Dame Maggie Smith!

CHEERING APPLAUSE

It's a big deal, they don't stand up for people. Did they stand up? They

did, not all of them, but some of them did, the ones that could do it.

Thank you. We're thrilled, we never thought this day would come. Neither

did I. It's a long time since the last one. Alex Jennings I'm ignoring

you, hello. Hello. You are both so good in this film, terrific, it's

fantastic. The Lady in the Van opens on the 13th of November. Which is a

Friday. LAUGHTER Say no more. In that clip we got the

idea you are delayed in the van. Yeah. -- UART The Lady in the Van.

Miss Shepherd was real? Miss Shepherd was very real and very

frightening. She was real, and the fact: Put up with her for so long is

beyond anybody's comprehension. Nobody understands that. 15 years.

She was in that van outside his window. The film begins with him

describing peace now. Don't! And you play... Two different versions of

Alan Bennett. I do Paige different versions, the writer, who is

observing Alan Bennett, as it were, having a life, or not having a life,

wishing he was having a more exciting life so he could write

about things other than old ladies. Was Alan Bennett there the whole

time? Yeah, it was creepy, there were so many of them. They were

everywhere, all over. Gloucester Crescent was it? It was the more we

filmed it in the house where it all happened. That is extraordinary, it

never happens with a film where you get a film on the street. We were

there, the van was there. Did the neighbours think, my God, she's

back? The ones that remember it were frightened. Jonathan Miller looked a

bit... He looked a bit... Worried. He wandered into the shop a couple

of times. It's quite a starry street. That's what they said, I

didn't notice. I was in the van most of the time. Jonathan Miller

appeared once or twice looking a bit fed up, which is not surprising

because it was, you know, all that stuff going on in your street is not

amusing. You say you were in the van, how much time did you spend in

the van and how unpleasant does it get? What was difficult, as you

might think, was getting in and out of it. And how the hell that woman

did it. I mean... You just can't imagine because it's the smallest

space, isn't it? To think, we're talking for a very long time. I

don't want to go into it, but she did everything there. She did. I'll

go no further, but she did everything. Over the course of the

filming apparently, you were saying Alex, the van was shared. Yes, we

were filming in Alan's house, the van was back in the street. It was

disgusting, I mean, full of old bits of vegetables. It was horrible. It

was horrible. Sanitary ware hanging... Don't! It wasn't mine, it

was Miss Shepherd's. And there was some kind of token security when we

weren't filming there. Security came in one morning, we were due to start

shooting, I don't know, quite early in the morning. And discovered four

feet poking out of the end of the van. Two Camden Town revellers had

broken into the van and spent the night in it. They got rid of them,

cleans the van out of all this stuff, cleaned it, put it back

before she came on set. She. She. And didn't tell Maggie. Everyone was

sworn to secrecy, don't tell Maggie, don't tell Maggie. What they thought

I'd do I don't know, I was sorely tempted to come like Miss Shepherd

tonight. I have this horrible thing, what should I wear? I feel haunted

by her, she lived in Storrington quite near where I live, I live in a

village next door, little place. She was in a nunnery because she was

wanting... Don't know whether she wanted to become a nun, but it was

one of the ideas in the family, they thought it was a good idea to do

that. They used to be huge -- there used to be a huge nunnery in

Storrington. When I go in there, which I do sometimes, I go to

Waitrose and various things... I always think, I wonder what it was

like when she... When she was here, you know, as a young person.

It's... It's very odd playing a person who is real, which is what

you found, wasn't it? Alan Bennett on one side, then even the fact they

wouldn't tell you people were in the van, it's intimidating when Dame

Maggie Smith is on the set for you? Not for you. LAUGHTER

I pointed around you. It's not intimidating, we've worked together.

Liar! There was the odd moment. I was much more intimidated because

every single person on that set had been at the National with Nick

Hytner or in The History Boys. So I was such an outsider you wouldn't

believe. I really felt I ought to audition. I really did. The play? I

felt an outsider, you were very cliquey. Were we? Yes, you were. And

it made me feel very... Very annoyed. So I don't know why you

were intimidated. You do know what it's like from the other side. I've

read in interviews you talked about how intimidating you found it

when... In the 60s when you worked with Laurence Olivier. Ooh! It

sounds like he was very tough. Well, yes, but I think everybody who

worked with him... They were in all. He hit me very hard one night.

You're kidding? Onstage? Yes, he was a bit cross with me. At one point he

had to say, out, Devil! Dubai. He slapped me, I hit the floor. I think

it was Edward Petherbridge, a Venetian gentleman, apparently, he

said, ooh, Mags. I don't remember because I literally went out. I

remember saying, well, I did see stars at the National Theatre. I

really did. When you did Desdemona to his fellow, you gave as good as

you got? Yes. -- to his Othello. This is when he was doing Othello

and wearing all that make-up, all that's... Are used to stick his

eyelashes on for him. -- I used to. Great big eyelashes. I went in one

night, he said Darling Maggie, I've been meaning to tell you, I think

your vowels are not very good. Could you watch it? Anyway, I went in the

next night to do his eyelashes and things and said, how now brown cow?

He didn't get it. You asked what it's like being with

Maggie, it's working with the best, because she is the best. Stop it.

APPLAUSE. I know that's not true. And before you film, before you go

on stage, you are getting fantastic nuggets about Noel Coward and

Laurence Olivier or being taught Polari by Kenneth Williams, and

Bette Davis. She's really naughty. You've had this

extraordinary career. You know, I mentioned the Oscars

in the introduction and things. That did sort of change your life

in a way. Well, yes,

a lot of very small people kind LAUGHTER. There's

a whole different of people. But also it's so weird they would

only know you for that one thing. Except one kid once said to me,

he said, were you really a cat? And I heard myself saying,

just pull yourself together... There's the Harry Potter bit of your

life, which kind of changed your Is that one of those things

where you thought you were famous It's only since Downton that people

seem to know, you know, It's only since Downton

and that's television for you. Funnily enough, I was in Waitrose

in Storrington, my favourite. And a little boy was

at the checkout with his mother. I thought,

what am I going to do about it? Kept looking at me and looking

at me. It's all right,

it'll come to me in a minute. The people coming up to you now,

Americans, you know, But I don't go anywhere, really,

where they can get at me. CHEERING Because it's usually

in museums and art galleries Are you in a way glad that Downton

is over? LAUGHTER No, because honestly,

she was about, by the time we Alex,

I know you're a big Downton fan. I do, yeah, we watch it and we

shout at it because I'm not in it. Have we got it on good authority

that the actual Queen watches Downton Abbey? We hear that she's a

fan. You are not supposed to talk about that. I was told that she did,

but I have been told by another gentleman who works this those

establishments that she likes Midsomer murder. Who doesn't? I

didn't take it badly. Alan when it isn't the first real person you

played. You played Prince Charles. I did, and one of the reviews said,

why have they cast somebody who looks like George Bush. You know

Prince Charles don't you? I wouldn't say I know him but he's patron of an

actors charity I'm involved in. You're in love with him, look at

you! That's the funniest thing anyone's ever said. Give me an OBE.

Yes, he hasn't seen The Queen, I know. For sure. I mean The Queen,

the film. Has she seen it? But his wife has. Did she like it? She did,

she said, what was it like playing my husband? Oh! She was quite

twinkly. She is really very nice. Clearly you are Dame Maggie Smith,

we know that. I'm not that when I'm working. Oh, so on a poster it says

that? Yeah, because you don't use it professionally. OK. Unless you're,

who is it, Sir King Bens lie. LAUGHTER. We must mention your other

incredible honour, an elite group, the Order of the Companions of

Honour. That's a good hat isn't it? Good hat, good shoes, good dress.

How does that happen, how do you join that elite group? It sort of

happens when people die. You take their place. I see! So there's a

fixed number. There's a fixed number, so... They just hang around

a bit there'll be another vacancy. LAUGHTER. It has been wonderful to

meet you both. Please don't wait another 42 years. There isn't time!

We'll put it in the books now. OK. The Lady In The Van is such a funny,

sweet film. It opens on 13th November. I urge you to see it.

Ladies and gentlemen, Alex Jennings and Dame Maggie Smith!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. It is time for our musical guest tonight. This

man went from YouTube sensation to bona fide superstar. Boosh boosh

boosh please welcome Mr Justin Bieber.

# When you nod your head yes # But you wanna say no

# When you don't want me to move # But you tell me to go

# What do you mean? # Oh, what do you mean?

# What do you mean? # Oh-oh-oh, what do you mean?

# You're so indecisive is what I'm saying

# Don't know if you're happy or complaining

# First you wanna go to the left # Then you turn right

# Wanna argue all day # Making love all night

# First you're up then you're down # And then in between

# When you nod your head yes # But you wanna say no

# When you don't want me to move # But you tell me to go

# What do you mean? # Oh, what do you mean?

# You're overprotective when I'm leaving

# Trying to compromise, but I can't win

# You wanna make a point but you keep preaching

# First you wanna go to the left # Then you turn right

# Wanna argue all day, make love all night

# First you're up then you're down # Then you're in between

# When you nod your head yes # But you wanna say no

# When you don't want me to move # But you tell me to go

# I wanna know # Oh, what do you mean?

# Said you're running out of time # What do you mean?

# When you don't want me to move # But you tell me to go

# What do you mean? # Oh-oh-oh, what do you mean?

# Better make up your mind # What do you mean? #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. Mr Justin Bieber everybody. Thank you very

much. That was fantastic. Thank you for doing that. Congratulations.

It's number one everywhere isn't it? Yeah, it is. It must be a relief. It

is. You bring out new material... It is good to have people accept the

music and not be about my personal life. That's why I started in the

first place. It feels really good, because I'm growing up and my music

is growing up. It's fun. And you're out here busting a move. Obviously

the voice is why we know you. Is that easy for you, the dancing

stuff? What's hard is singing and dancing and trying to breathe at the

same time. I'm forgetting to breathe because I'm so conscious of the

moves and my voice, but I'm getting better at it. Good, we don't want to

lose you on my watch. That song, what do you mean, it's a cry from

the heart to the women of the world. I never know what they mean. All

boys don't know what girls mean. That's why we needed an anthem. Boys

walking down the street, what do you mean? Next time you're in an

argument, say, what do you mean? That's the thing about boys, you

know exactly what you mean. New album, Purpose, is out November

13th. Yep. Very good. Thank you. No, it is. Presumably you will tour with

this? I'm coming back to London to tour here as well. Please come and

see us again, Justin. We love having you here. Thank you.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. No time for the red chair tonight. Just time to

say thanks to Justin Bieber, Alex Jennings, Bradley Cooper and Dame

Maggie Smith. Next week it is Julie Walters and Michael Fassbender. I

will see you then. Goodbye!