Episode 14 The Graham Norton Show

Tonight on the show, the stars of the new Ab Fab movie.

We've got so much in common - a glass of Bollie,

the fashionable outfit, what was

the other thing? Oh!

Oh, yes, falling down drunk.

Let's start the show!

CHEERING

Oh! Oh!

Oh!

Good evening! Good evening,

you're very kind. Welcome one, welcome all.

It's Friday night! CHEERING

And we are leaving Europe!

WAILS AND BOOS

HE CHUCKLES

In a vote led by other areas. LAUGHTER

Yes, Brexit won. But the good news is,

from now on we don't have to let nutters into

the country just because they've got a European passport.

LAUGHTER

But for anyone wanting to

get away from all of the referendum nonsense,

why not go to Glastonbury? Anybody here going to Glastonbury?

No, nobody? No? LAUGHTER

I sort of wish I was there now, I mean,

it looks so much fun, doesn't it?

LAUGHTER

That looks like fun!

100,000 people expected at that event.

But the good news is,

this year they've got two toilets.

Yeah, really. Adele is headlining. Yes, she is.

WHOOPING Yeah!

Here she is waving to her fans on her way to Glastonbury. Aww!

And here she is waving to her fans when she got there.

LAUGHTER

Let's get some guests on! CHEERING

Later we'll have music from the one and only Iggy Pop,

ladies and gentlemen! CHEERING

He will be performing with Josh Homme and The Band.

But first, this Aussie actress turned Hollywood star

has made us laugh in Bridesmaids,

Pitch Perfect, and How To Be Single. Now taking to

the stage as Miss Adelaide in Guys and Dolls,

it's Rebel Wilson!

CHEERING Yeah!

Whoo!

They love you, they love you! Rebel Wilson, everybody!

And for over 20 years, these Bafta-winning stars

have played two of comedy's most notorious characters.

Now Patsy and Edina are back in

Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie. Crack open the Bollie,

it's Joanna Lumley and Jennifer Saunders!

CHEERING Yay! Yeah!

Hello! How do we do?

Lovely to see you.

Aww!

What a happy couch

-for the last show of the series!

-Yay!

Lovely to see you all. "Yay!" Rebel, you are

-a fan of Ab Fab, aren't you?

-Erm, I'm, like,

the world's biggest fan. I just asked Joanna to

-sign some DVDs and posters.

-HE CHUCKLES

She's not making that up, I did see it happen.

Yeah, I'm, like, a megafan. I guess when

I saw the show at first, I was working in a video store

and I didn't want to work, so I put on the show,

the DVDs, and I just... Really, I think it

was the first time I'd seen women be funny. It was like...

-I know, I'm going to...

-Don't cry, don't cry!

-HE CHUCKLES

-I know, really, they're

such inspirations to me and my real heroes,

-so it is such an honour to be here tonight.

-Aww!

APPLAUSE

It's good!

Ladies and gentlemen,

congratulations are in order because, very recently,

Jennifer Saunders was awarded

Glamour Magazine's... I think it was, Best Woman Ever,

-was it?

-I think that's what they said, yeah.

Something like that. Most Wonderful Human Being Of All Time.

-Of all time.

-Something like that.

-Voted by the planet.

LAUGHTER

-Is that what it was?

-I think it was. You met a Kardashian

-on the way in.

-To be honest, I didn't meet her.

-You encountered her.

-I came across her.

-I can't look at it.

-LAUGHTER

I can't look at it. I was showing off for my friend.

That's all I am going to say, I can't

actually look. It's called photo bom-bing.

-Photobomb.

-I love her face in this one,

because she's, like, "Security, is there anyone?"

It was just Dawn going, "Do it again. Go on, do it again".

LAUGHTER

-Who is that? Do it again.

-Look at the side glance there.

People take it so seriously. I can't be doing with it.

I suppose they flew her in to stand on carpet.

Non-smiling... And not smile?

-Oh.

-Oh!

-Talking of awards, though...

-Yes?

-..Rebel's won an award.

-Oh...

-Yes. MTV, MTV... LAUGHTER

-What was it?

-Erm...best kiss.

-Hello!

Yeah. Because some people win awards for

acting and writing, but sometimes kissing is also good.

-It's award-winning.

-Yeah,

and it really helps in your social life

if you've won a kissing award.

And you recreated it on stage, you recreated the award-winning kiss.

-Mm-hm. The people demanded it.

-Who's that?

Did you know you were just going to keep going,

-because it did get, kind of, out of hand?

-Yeah,

I actually ripped my dress.

There's something about... Which is why I'm a bit scared going

into a live show here in the West End, because

when the crowd just cheers you on, you just

-go for it?

-LAUGHTER

Yeah, I seem to, like, lose all

inhibitions and embarrass myself and my family.

Ooh, I'm coming to the opening night!

Well, Joanna Lumley will see that kiss and raise it.

-Yes.

-Yes, because you got to snog...

-Yeah.

..well, Leonardo DiCaprio.

-But you went for it, didn't you?

-Of course!

-Yes!

There you are in The Wolf Of Wall Street.

Now, did you do the professional actor thing of talking

about it beforehand?

No, but we both had a lot of peppermint and kind of sluiced our

mouths out an awful lot. I think we were both anxious about it.

Were you weeping from peppermint tears?

We were, like, just really clean, like a kind of surgery.

Sort of really clean, a peppermint surgery.

And we did quite a lot of kissing. We did quite a lot of kissing,

but as I was playing his wife's aunt, it wasn't really great,

and I wasn't looking great, I was wearing

sort of Oxfam clothes. I was a bit depressed!

LAUGHTER

-But, still, it happened.

-It happened and he was very charming.

Oooooh!

-LAUGHTER

-That was a lot of noise.

I couldn't make it again.

Now, Ab Fab - The Movie, how long have we been waiting?

It finally opens everywhere on the 1st of July.

CHEERING I know, yeah.

It's been talked about so many times.

Why, how has it finally happened?

Well, it was only being talked about because people kept saying,

"Are you ever going to do a movie?" And I was always, "I don't know. Maybe not, I don't know."

So, finally, I thought, "Well, actually it's quite a good idea."

-Oh, OK.

-So I made it.

So what's the big idea, what's the

-storyline that makes this all hang together?

-The storyline is

they are...extremely old, very desperate.

Edina has lost, spent all of her money. She has,

literally, consumed a whole district to make her house

and she's in need of a little

injection of somebody or something to her PR company.

And Patsy decides that should be Kate Moss.

-Of course.

-And it goes

horribly, horribly wrong, and they kill Kate Moss, basically.

-They kill her.

-LAUGHTER

Between the two of them, they somehow manage to kill her

-and go on the run. I mean, that's the story.

-The police are

after them, obviously, and so we have to flee the country.

So we go down to the south of France, which,

as Jennifer rightly said, is when you're thinking of a film,

-first of all think where you'd like to go.

-We thought South of France.

LAUGHTER

Actually, that was our very first thought.

We said, "Hey, let's do a movie." "Yeah, where are we going to go?"

"Erm...South of France?" "Yeah. Quite nice.

"Quite like October?" "Yeah, nice."

-LAUGHTER

-OK, what's the plot?

-Did you have a list of supermodels if Kate Moss said no?

-No.

LAUGHTER

And the weird thing was that I had gone along with this

without ever thinking to ask her. I had, literally,

written it, sold it to whoever, you know, Fox, and the BBC.

They've all gone, "That's fantastic. Have you asked Kate?"

And I went, "Oh, actually, no, I haven't."

-LAUGHTER

-Dammit! I must ask Kate Moss.

But in my head, I just thought, "Well, she's so cool,

and she's obviously just going to say yes," which she did.

-She did!

-Yes, because she is cool.

How was she on set? Because, you know, she's Kate Moss.

-Fabulous.

-She's extraordinary. That's Kate on set!

But that is the Thames, that's the actual filthy, dirty Thames.

It is, and she had to be in there quite a lot. But the great

thing she said was, because everyone was

making a fuss of her and putting blankets around her,

giving her cups of tea, and she just said, "Look, if this was a modelling

"shoot, they'd just tell me to stop shivering."

So she was really cool, really cool.

So, Kate Moss gets in the Thames, Jennifer and Joanna,

-not so much in the Thames.

-Not so much.

-No.

-No.

-No.

-No.

LAUGHTER

From a distance, you might think that's the two

-of you in a boat on the Thames.

-Yes.

-But on closer inspection...

LAUGHTER

Oh!

APPLAUSE

-Is that your stunt doubles?

-Yeah.

The word "stunt" really doesn't occur. That was just...

-They're sitting in a boat!

-What was that for?

We went onto the Thames at night-time and we did

the sitting on the boat thing, and the chasing around, trying to

look for stuff, but then the boat had to go hammering off

upriver, very fast.

Obviously not.

So chaps get in and do that far away distant back view thing.

And we went and had a glass of something.

LAUGHTER Obviously, hand-selected

-stunt double.

-Accuracy.

-They were, actually,

-properly measured for that.

-LAUGHTER

Now, Rebel Wilson, you're here to talk about your

-West End debut in Guys and Dolls.

-Yeah.

-But you are also in the Ab Fab movie.

-I know. I know.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yeah, lifelong dream fulfilled, tick.

Weird thing was, we'd booked her when she was nobody.

-Yeah. Yeah.

-She was, like,

"They gave me an award for, like, possibly best newcomer," something like that

-and in between, stratospheric, can I say?

-It's weird.

-Yes, it's true.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

But originally, because I was living with

Matt Lucas at the time and he told me

Jennifer was writing a script, I'm, like,

"Man, I've got to get in that." So I wrote her, like, a

-begging e-mail, I guess you would call it.

-Yeah, begging. Yeah, it was

-pretty beggy.

-"Please, please..." You know,

-"I'll do it for free, any time..."

-"Please DM me on Twitter."

I think I had a brilliant idea that

I could've been Patsy's long-lost daughter. That she

had just forgotten about, cos it's...

Like, forgotten about! GRAHAM CHUCKLES

Don't you imagine that she could've just had a baby and she forgot?

-"Oh, cheers."

-LAUGHTER

Yeah. But, in fact,

I got a much better role,

the prime role of unnamed air hostess.

-Whoa. Oh, there she is.

-So, yeah.

-APPLAUSE

-I know.

-Weird thing is, by the time Rebel could film,

she literally had about an hour in her whole life

which she could give to us and she gave us that hour,

and it was absolutely brilliant.

-And, look, you're on with Rylan!

-Yeah, Rylan.

-Comedy gold.

-But in fairness, EVERYONE is in this film.

-You're in it.

-I'm in it.

Is anyone in the audience in it?

CHEERING Are you really?

Are you really in it? Hang on, microphone coming.

Tell us, what bit are you in?

-I'm an extra in...

-That's a microphone, calm down.

LAUGHTER

I'm an extra in the scene in the Royal Vauxhall Tavern

-with the drag queens.

-Oh, yes!

See, even people in the audience are in the film.

So talk us through some of the other names. Actually,

-we've got a picture of some of them.

-Oh! Look at that.

-Having drinks. Bruno Tonioli!

-Bruno Tonioli!

Well, he was insistent, obviously.

-He never stops.

-And there's Kate,

so the back row's Jennifer, Kate, me,

Lulu, John Hamm, Gwendoline Christie,

-Celia Imrie, Janette Krankie...

-Janette Tough.

..and Bruno Tonioli.

-All human life is here.

-All human life is there.

-And that man.

-Every height and sex. It's just...

-All the same species!

-All right. Tell you what, let's watch a clip.

This is Patsy and Edina on yet another morning

-after the night before.

-OK.

-Pats! Pats!

-What?

Today's the day I sign the deal on my book deal, darling.

Oh! Oh, my goodness.

-Yeah. Fabulous.

-Am I in it?

Of course you're in it, darling, because you are my oldest,

oldest friend.

And who will play me, Eddie?

-Well, darling, it's only just, like, nearly a book.

-Oh!

It will be a film, though, sweetheart, because it's about me,

-ain't it?

-Yeah.

-You know, it's about London's premier fashion PR.

-Yeah.

-PATSY CHUCKLES

-Fabulous.

And who will play me, Eddie, not Jane Fonda?

I've had stem cells and the blood of a two-year-old child

injected into my skin and my face still looks like this.

You need to be using foetus blood, Eddie,

a little spritz of afterbirth, darling.

-Keep up, sweetie.

-Keep up.

SUCTIONING

-EDINA GROANS

-I want to go in there,

but I have to go past that big mirror.

I think I am now officially fatter sideways

than I am front on, darling.

Darling, you don't need those. I am your mirror.

How do I look?

-Fabulous.

-Thank you!

Oh!

-You need to move that, Eddie.

-Yeah, I'll call Kelly Hoppen.

Fabulous.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Very good.

In my head, Absolutely Fabulous is just... It's just a current show.

-But it's been in our lives for 24 years.

-Yep.

-Which is nuts.

-1990 was the first. 26.

26 years, wow. And, Joanna,

you were saying when you first got cast,

the chemistry, you didn't feel it.

Look, I'd known about... Everybody knew about French and Saunders.

Everybody knew about that and I'd been sent this unbelievably funny script

and I was longing to do it. I couldn't believe it. I laughed out loud, Rebel.

You know when you open something and you laugh out loud...

It's very rare. Most of the time you read the script, you're like, "That's shit."

But this was gold and so I went round to meet

Jennifer for the first time ever. First time ever,

at the BBC and we sat in a pretty sort of odd little office

-and we sat together like this.

-Two little chairs.

Two little chairs, as if we were sat in the back of a taxi.

-"Good morning."

-"Good morning. Hello."

-"Hello."

I go, "Hello, I'm Joanna."

"Jennifer Saunders."

And we opened up the page and we started to read and I didn't know

who Patsy was, because it hadn't explained who she was.

You didn't explain.

You had written your own lines...

I know, but you weren't the idea I had for Patsy, you see.

No, it's true! It's absolutely true.

-I mean, it was better, you made it better.

-We read it through

a couple of times and each time Jennifer just sat there staring.

"Oh, this is awful." So then, we tried again

and I almost said...

-SCOTTISH ACCENT:

-"Shall I do it Scottish or something?

And then at the end, Jon Plowman,

our wonderful producer who sort of nursed us through everything,

said, "Well, jolly good. "Marvellous rehearsals,"

And I went to my agent,

not my present agent, and I just said, "Get me out of it.

"She hates me! She said nothing to me. She just sort of went..."

-JOANNA MUMBLES

-And I said, "Get me out."

My agent said, "It's only a pilot, just do it."

-And now look!

-Yeah.

-Now you know.

And how did, like, the alcoholic and the drug stuff...

That was Jennifer. No, that was Jennifer.

I didn't know anything about drinking or anything like that.

LAUGHTER

I think what happened was that we got on

and we just had such a good laugh

that everything that she brought, which was the

modelling and the other stuff, the '60s stuff...

-The drug-taking.

-..and the drug-taking, and all that,

it just... We just had fun inventing it and it was...

And weirdly, the fashion world influenced it, but

Bananarama, the former lady band, they...

-"The former lady band"!

-LAUGHTER

-They are a band!

-They play...

-Have you got your lady bands in?

-LAUGHTER

-I'm wearing mine tonight.

-LAUGHTER

-But they played a part.

-Yeah, because Bananarama

were the hardest drinking girls I've ever met in the '80s.

When were they in it?

-They weren't in it.

-Oh, I see.

-But I met them later...

LAUGHTER

Never done drugs. Never done drugs.

-Because Dawn and I worked with them.

-Oh, of course.

We did the Comic Relief thing together and we kind of got to know them.

I've never met girls that drunk so hard, because in those days,

people didn't drink vodka. They drank so much vodka.

They would drink a bottle of vodka and they'd go,

"Come on, let's go and party."

And we used to go and party with them and just watch them,

and I remember one of them opening a cab door

and coming out arse first onto the pavement and thinking

it was the most brilliant thing I'd ever seen.

I just thought, "I love that, I want to be that."

Can I just say, speaking of drinking, on my one day

on the Ab Fab set, it was like totally how you would imagine it,

because it was like working for one hour

and then drinking champagne for the rest of the day.

-Suddenly, just bottles came out.

-She was on the last day.

-Oh!

-That was because it was you, Rebel.

-It was for you.

-It wasn't like that every day?

-No.

We just didn't want to let you down.

Just wanted to get smashed together.

LAUGHTER

It was so good. It was my best day at work ever.

The day I did, I just left and got on the DLR.

LAUGHTER

-It's true. It was in Canary Wharf, wasn't it?

-Yeah. "Bye. Thanks. Bye."

Joanna brought to Ab Fab all your modelling experience.

Because you as a model, when you look

through the old shots, you were incredible.

You were quite proppy as a model.

Show me something, fruits... Smiling at fruits.

No, you can work on a car. Here's some shots.

-That's me!

-Yeah, working a car.

-Working a car.

Accessorising a car with your shoes, which is hard to do.

-Yep.

-That's actually a handbag, it's not a car.

And that was a little black wig.

We had to provide all our own wigs and hairpieces.

Then, she's rocking a motorbike.

Look at that! Now you want to buy that motorbike, don't you?

That wasn't when I was modelling, that's when I was really old. I was 40 there.

-Really?

-How old are you now?

-LAUGHTER

The final edit hasn't been done on the film, Rebel.

Yes. We know where that pineapple might end up.

-LAUGHTER

-The truth is,

that was the picture for something completely different.

-I only modelled from when I was 18 to 21...

-What was that for?

-What the hell was that for?

-Funnily enough,

it was for something like Children In Need.

It was a Valentine's Day thing and the dress was sold in aid.

That was Patrick Lichfield's motorbike.

When I look at that photo I think, Children In Need.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

Joanna, what was this for? Were you trying to sell a cow?

-That was Tess Of The D'Urbervilles.

-I've never seen that picture before.

I'll tell you when you'd done it,

it was just after you'd been in Coronation Street,

-but it was before Purdy.

-So I wasn't a model then, so I was obviously

doing it for something to do with drink more milk or something,

I don't know, because that's not modelling.

That was my special brown hair. When I wanted to be an actress...

-Special brown hair!

-Listen, being a model, in those years,

it was very tragic to have been a model, so to show I was

a serious actress, I always dyed my hair brown.

-Oh.

-That's me with my special brown Coronation Street hair.

-Oh, I see!

-Now you can see I kind of...

-Maybe it's for a play.

I don't know. No, no. How could that be a play!

Well, it's not a theatre, but it could be the publicity for a play.

-Yes, you're right, it could. A panto perhaps.

-Panto.

Jack And The Beanstalk. Hello.

But the thing is, actors have to do the modelling now

-and, Rebel, you've done modelling.

-Urgh!

I literally do more modelling than acting now.

-Do you?

-Yeah. They never tell you, like, yeah, you're gonna have to do

modelling as part of it, but you do.

-And it can be quite dangerous.

-Er, yeah. OK, one time,

my publicist went out of the room and they said,

"Rebel, you know what will be really cool?

"If you just, like, hold that hairspray and spray it

"and then get the cigarette lighter and

"spray it and it'll be like a huge flame,

"it'll look really cool and hot." And so

I did it as a test, put this massive flame into the air.

I was like, "This is going to look sick."

So they get the camera out, I do it,

and the first time I did it, some hairspray had

all gone over my arm, so the second time I did it,

my arm caught fire and I had to go...

..to save myself and I thought,

"This is what happened to Michael Jackson."

LAUGHTER

The publicist goes out of the room...bad stuff happens. Yeah.

-It's just what you go through for beauty.

-Yes!

It's worth it, though. It's worth it.

-The picture looked hot.

-Hey, ladies and gentlemen,

much excitement, because Rebel Wilson is coming to the West End.

This actual West End. Yeah. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

It's your debut. You are at the Phoenix Theatre taking over

as Miss Adelaide in the incredibly well reviewed Guys and Dolls

A big, big hit. Look at that sparkly, shiny person.

That's the modelling.

It's from the 28th of June. That's next Tuesday.

It's this Tuesday I'm starting.

Should I be at rehearsals now? Yes!

I've been here a week.

I need to learn the show.

-Next Tuesday!

-Next Tuesday!

If you guys come this coming week,

it's going to be very interesting because I'm not quite prepared.

-It's all singing, all dancing.

-I know!

-It starts previews on Tuesday?

-No, it's the actual full-on show.

Do you know the words?

Yeah, I know like...

# Guys and dolls

# Do-do-do-do-do... #

That's the one bit.

Have you learned the dancing? The dances are the hard bit.

I actually... Oh, my God!

I got off the plane last week

and they're like, "We're going to fit you for costumes for the show."

I thought, "Sweet, bring on some jeans." Free jeans.

But they said, "You're going to actually be wearing a leotard."

I was like...

I've never really worn a leotard, purposefully.

So the very first thing, bloated,

getting measured for this very low-cut, high-cut leotard.

So I'm a little bit worried yesterday

because I'm coming onto the show next week,

so I got what's called an anti-cellulite massage.

-Have you guys ever had that?

-No.

It's where they rub all your fat and your stomach.

What they don't tell you is, don't go out after the massage

because it can make you go to the toilet a lot.

So they really massage you?

If anyone's ever had a stomach massage, they'll remember.

Because it can... You can get in emergency situations.

-Did you go out?

-Yeah.

But I think my legs are looking real smooth, though.

If you come and see me in the show, you will see...

-Do you have to wear a leotard in the show?

-Yeah, I do.

Because I'm a burlesque dancer in the show

in a place called the Hot Box which is like...

It's a vagina reference.

-It's a vagina reference.

-It's a vagina reference.

-Certainly.

-And I strip in the show, but not to nude.

-You can bring kids.

-You strip to leotard?

-Yeah.

I don't want to be horrible,

but could you give us a little blast of something?

-Oh, my God!

-A song.

CHEERING

Warm up. Here's one of my songs for the show.

Two, three, four...

# I've loved you

# A bushel and a peck

# A bushel and a peck

# Give a hug around the neck

# A hug around the neck

# A barrel and a heap

# A barrel and a heap

# And I'm talking in my sleep

# About you. #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Beautiful! Beautiful.

One of my sexy numbers.

OK, it's time to meet my musical guests tonight.

He's the godfather of punk, with a career spanning 50 years.

His latest album has been acclaimed as his best ever.

He's joined by an award-winning record producer

and front man of the rock and roll juggernaut Queens of the Stone Age.

Please welcome Josh Homme and the great Iggy Pop.

MUSIC: Lust For Life by Iggy Pop

APPLAUSE

Really nice to see you.

If you move down a little bit.

Everyone move down. There you go.

-We're remaining, we're not leaving?

-No, everyone stays.

-Did you guys meet backstage before? No.

-I've met Josh.

We met out front, I was parking cars.

I gave him my keys.

Congratulations, guys. This album has done so well.

Thanks.

It's called Post Pop Depression.

They missed me when it was over.

It's not over yet. It's out now.

You are doing a number from the album later on.

-Which one are you doing?

-Sunday, it's called.

It's about, you know, being tired.

OK!

The two of you worked together on the album. Who contacted who?

I texted him.

I thought he was young and beautiful and I wanted to work with him.

-Who wouldn't?

-Thank you.

-Hi.

-Hi.

What did you send him, you sent him a bunch of stuff.

Later, I sent him... I wanted to wind him up a little, you know,

make him think about me. I sent kind of a dossier.

I sent him one thing of comedic poetry called German Trivia, like,

"Hey, Josh, do you know what they call a dick in Germany?"

"They call it a schwanz. Do you know what they call a womaniser?"

They call it a schwanzdreger.

That's like a tail-dragger, stuff like that.

And you thought, this is the man I want to work with?

I thought, "Ja, dis is helpful."

Was this the same dossier where you sent your stories about chairs?

-Poems about chairs?

-Well, I was old before I had my first solid rental.

I really didn't have any home base for most of my life.

When I finally got some dough,

I not only collect chairs but I go

and sit in each one every day over and over,

because I've got a chair!

I have a place to park my ass.

I have Gothic chairs, I have an old Norman chair,

I've got Asian chairs, Indian chairs, modern chairs,

Adirondack chairs, and at certain times I make the rounds.

Yeah!

-This is a nice way to live!

-Yeah, yeah!

Do you have any sofas, or is it all individual seating?

I am married and my wife takes care of sofas.

That's her interest.

I wonder, in the poem, what's going to become of the chairs,

when I'm gone, because, well, you know, this is part of life...

-Yes, yes...

-It's a poem.

-Let's not dwell on that.

-It's OK.

Yeah, chairs always find a new ass.

-Yes.

-Just like me.

Scoot over, you know.

When you were working together, you lived together,

but apparently your wife was worried about sending you off to live with other people.

Well, I sleep in the nude, and I spend a lot of time in the nude.

I live in Miami, I like to be nude.

And she said, "Well, you can't just walk around, you are going

to be living with these people, you need some pyjamas, you know," and...

I like that it went from nude to pyjamas.

Sweat pants?

Nude to Hugh Hefner, boom!

We were living in this little tiny, it was kind of a shack

in the desert, and Josh's car alarm went off at 2am.

He sleeps in his skivvies, I learned,

because he jumped right out in his skivvies,

and I had my pyjamas,

and I had a robe with a shawl collar.

LAUGHTER

But also he had a smoke machine and doves were released.

I'm outside, going, "Who the hell is out there, you're a dead man,"

and I turn around and these doves fly.

And I just got lost in it for a minute.

Because, I don't know about you, when you see Iggy on stage,

I always thought you came on stage and took your shirt off.

But it's more a case of you put trousers on to go on stage.

Yeah! That's it.

It makes it really easy to gauge his level of excitement, though.

LAUGHTER

Josh, you have brought us a picture of Iggy backstage

with the rest of the band.

Well, I think in the spirit of celebration,

and the sort of, like, to get across what it's like.

And also, this was after our first gig,

when we finished our first gig and I thought we should come together

and just have a toast, you know?

-So, this was right after the gig...

-He's unaware of the photo.

This is going to be really cool, I thought.

Here is Iggy Pop and the rest of the band post-perf.

-Classy.

-It's a beautiful picture.

APPLAUSE

Beautiful, very good.

Listen, I know you are going to perform for us,

so if you guys want to go and join the rest of the band.

Iggy and Josh, everybody.

CHEERING

Shove back up, shove back up.

Shortly, we will have our last visit of the series to the big red chair,

but first, performing the current single, Sunday, it's Iggy Pop!

APPLAUSE

# This house is as slick as a senator's statement

# This job is a masquerade of recreation

# Like a wreck

# I'm sinking fast

# The key to everything

# I crawl for Sunday

# When I don't have to move

# Caught up in dreams untangled one day

# When I don't have to prove

# The days roll on

# And finally, Sunday

# A Sunday afternoon

# I've got it all

# But what's it for

# But getting some more?

# Always ready, always steady now

# Always ready, always steady now

# This street is as cold as a corporate lawsuit

# A pride I won't chide's telling me to wipe my boot

# I'm a wreck

# So what did you expect?

# The key to everything

# I crawl for Sunday

# When I don't have to move

# Wrapped up in dreams untangled one day

# When I don't have to prove

# The days roll on

# And finally, Sunday

# A Sunday afternoon

# I've got it all

# And so what now?

Come on, girls!

# Do what they say and endure what they say

# Go back

# Do what they say and endure what they say

# Go back

# Do what they say and endure what they say till Sunday

# Until I'm black and blue

# Hey, what can I do

# Always ready, always steady now

# Always ready, always steady now. #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Wow! Wowza!

Iggy Pop, everybody!

Fantastic job! Come back and join us, do, come back and join us.

Well done. That's amazing.

Amazing, Iggy. Really, really fabulous.

Josh Homme, that was fabulous, have a seat at the end.

Just sit in there.

Fabulous.

And also we should do a special shout out,

because is it Matt, the drummer?

Matt Helders. Because he is from the Arctic Monkeys, hello. Hi.

CHEERING

But more than that, you have not quit your honeymoon,

but you have shortened your honeymoon for this?

-Yeah, I put it on hold.

-On hold!

-Please pause.

-"Please hold, honey."

-Thank you very much.

-She is here in the studio.

Well, she's not waiting long, is she?

-Literally the three minutes for the song.

-She's on hold.

Yeah!

By the way, that single is out now, and the album is out, as well.

Just fantastic, thank you so much. Thank you.

And that wall of sound is just fantastic.

-Really, really, really good.

-Really great.

-They were all bopping along.

If I could say, too, I'm such... Absolutely Fabulous really confirmed

that I should drink and smoke more, and I just want to say thanks.

Yeah!

CHEERING

-Thank you.

-What a lovely thing.

Surprised they were so well-behaved,

I don't think I have ever seen you properly behaved.

The night is young, Iggy.

All right, that's near the end, but before we go,

let's have a story or two from the big red chair, who's there?

-Hello, sir.

-Hello.

-What's your name?

-Dougie.

LAUGHTER

No, don't.

It's been the end of a long series.

Where are you from, Dougie?

I'm from the United States.

-OK, and whereabouts?

-Boston.

-Boston, and do you live here?

-Yes, 16 years.

OK, those borders are really closed, aren't they?

LAUGHTER

Immigration.

I want our country back.

OK, Dougie, off you go with your story.

-I have a story about Patsy and Eddie.

-Oh, yes.

Yes, takes us back to 1995,

a charity event at the Royal Albert Hall.

Jennifer Saunders came out on stage, looking very panicked

because she couldn't find her speech.

And suddenly the spotlight was on up in the tiers

of the Royal Albert Hall

and there was Patsy with a bottle of Stolichnaya...

LAUGHTER

-That's not a story, that's what happened.

-That's not a story.

That's what happened, I made that up!

That's my story.

I remember that.

He's been here for 16 years.

Did he think I actually had lost the speech? Honestly.

Shall we try another one? Let's try another one.

-I have high hopes for this one.

-Yeah, don't have a Dougie.

-What's your name? Hello.

-Hi. Alejandro.

-Alejandro?

-Yeah.

-Where are you from, Alejandro?

-Spain, South Spain.

-OK.

Have we planned this for tonight?

God forbid a British person to sit in this chair.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

I swear, we haven't planned this, we haven't.

Alejandro, you are very welcome in our land.

-How long have you been here, Alejandro?

-Three years now.

Three years, yeah, good on you, Alejandro. Do you have a job at all?

Yes, I do, I work as a barista in a coffee shop.

Yes, he does that.

-A beard shop, what is that?

-No, a coffee shop.

-He does something in a coffee shop.

-A barista.

He's a barista, he's a barista in a coffee shop! Yes!

We couldn't hear it because of your beard.

LAUGHTER

That's it, that's much better.

Do you have to wear one of those funny hairnets on your beard?

No, I don't. I fight really hard not to wear that.

Yeah, well done, you. Yes, stupid EU regulations.

LAUGHTER

So, off you go. Was it Alejandro?

Alejandro. Off you go.

I was dating this guy, like three months ago.

After two weeks dating him, I stayed for the first time at his place.

And he bought me dinner, he bought me this lovely Oreo ice cream,

I love ice cream, I love Oreos, and...

LAUGHTER

It was the first time I had to go to work from his place.

I worked really early morning, 5am, I had to get up at 3:30am,

I had to leave his place at 4.

I am lactose intolerant, I have a huge problem with that.

I sneak out his place, I locked the door,

it automatically locked after me,

and when I was walking down the stairs I felt like I needed like...

a little fart,

just a tiny bit,

and I couldn't control it, and I literally shit my pants.

LAUGHTER

I literally shit my pants.

He didn't know I was lactose intolerant,

I didn't want to be rude.

I ate half a jar of the ice cream, of course.

-So I didn't know what to do.

-Wait, there's more to this story?

Yeah, of course, I wasn't going to call him

because it was 4am, he wasn't going to pick up.

So I had to walk 20 minutes, after getting my bus to go to work,

and when I get the bus...

This story has turned.

I met my co-worker...

-Pull that knob, Graham...

-No...

-I want to know what happens.

You were on the bus, in your shitty pants,

you bump into a co-worker...

Yeah, and after a 30 minute journey on the bus,

she said something like, "Oh, doesn't this bus smell like shit?"

LAUGHTER

And I was really embarrassed.

-Wait, is that the end of the story?

-Basically.

Oh, for God's sake!

APPLAUSE

Well done, everyone.

If you would like to join us on the show and have a go on the red chair,

contact us via our website at this very address.

That is it for tonight.

Please say a huge thank you to my guests, Josh Homme!

Iggy Pop, everybody!

Rebel Wilson!

Joanna Lumley!

And Jennifer Saunders!

We're done for this run, the series is over,

but do join us next week for a look back

at some of the highlights of the series.

There were some. We'll be back in the autumn.

Until then, have a fantastic summer. Goodnight, everybody, bye-bye!

APPLAUSE