Kent v Sussex University Challenge

APPLAUSE

Christmas University Challenge.

Asking the questions, Jeremy Paxman.

'Tis the season to be jolly,

to get us to look more kindly upon our favourite auntie

when she discovers the mulled wine.

Lots of people who would normally know better

face the sort of questions we usually chuck at students.

Tonight, alumni from two of the so-called

plate-glass universities try to put themselves

among the four highest-scoring winning teams

from the seven first-round matches.

Doing so will put them in the semifinals.

Now, playing for the University of Kent,

first, is a man whose job involves

travelling to the world's remotest rivers.

In doing so he's been detained as a spy, threatened at gunpoint,

narrowly escaped drowning,

so we can expect him to take the next half hour

easily in his stride.

His colleague has worked for the BBC and ITV news,

she was also instrumental in the launch of the news channel

Al Jazeera English, from Qatar, and is currently the London anchor

for the Turkish news network TRT World

which is due to launch internationally in 2017.

Their captain trained as a local news journalist

before landing his first TV job in 1982.

At Channel 4 he was an editor on the youth show The Word

and a presenter on The Big Breakfast.

He's now a columnist, film reviewer and breakfast presenter

on talkRADIO.

Finally, someone who's interested in all things audio

began at the age of 11 during a school trip

to a radio studio in New York.

Since when she's become a leading authority on acoustics,

electronics and digital signal processing.

As a lecturer at the University of York,

she was an originator of the UK's first music technology course.

She's an inventor,

author and recipient of numerous awards in her field.

So, now let's ask them to introduce themselves.

Hello, I'm Jeremy Wade.

I got my postgraduate certificate in education

from the University of Kent in 1979

and an honorary Doctor of Science this year

and now I pursue outlandish underwater beasts

as the presenter of River Monsters.

Hello there, my name's Shiulie Ghosh,

I graduated from the University of Kent in 1989

with a degree in law

and now I am a TV journalist and news anchor.

-And here's their captain.

-I'm Paul Ross,

I got a BA Hons in English and American literature

from Kent University.

I was there from '75 to '78.

I arrived as a flared jean-wearing glam rocker,

I left as a drainpipe jean-wearing punk rocker.

Hello, I'm Jamie Angus, I read electronics

at the University of Kent, graduating in 1977.

I'm now professor of audio technology at Salford University.

APPLAUSE

Now, the team from the University of Sussex

are also a pleasingly mixed bag.

Their first member was named by Debrett's in The Sunday Times

as among the top 500 most influential people in the UK

and among the top 30 in technology.

He's been master of Birkbeck, Provost at Gresham College

and pro-vice-chancellor at the University of London,

posts he held concurrently before taking up his present role.

Next to him, a performer who was compared by Time Out

to a James Bond villain -

"Just when she looks like she's about to kiss you,

"she drops a tarantula down your pants."

Any fan of the cult series Red Dwarf will remember her as Holly,

the ship's computer with an IQ of 6,000.

Their captain has presented the news for Channel 4, ITN,

the BBC and now on Sky, where he also presents

a Sunday morning programme.

He was also the presenter of the BBC quiz Eggheads

for over ten years.

Finally, a leading lawyer with both a national

and international reputation.

He's been involved in numerous high-profile court cases,

including those following the Hatfield rail crash,

the death of Jean Charles de Menezes

and the Panorama programme on phone hacking.

Let's meet the Sussex team.

Hello, I'm Tim O'Shea.

In 1970, I graduated from Sussex in mathematics

and experimental psychology.

Now I'm the principal of the University of Edinburgh.

Hello, my name is Hattie Hayridge,

I graduated from Sussex in 1983

with a degree in international relations.

I'm now a comedienne.

And this is their captain.

Hello, I'm Dermot Murnaghan.

I was at Sussex between 1976 and 1980.

I graduated with an MA in history.

I'm now a presenter at Sky News.

Hi, I'm Alex Bailin, I read maths at Cambridge and then law at Sussex.

I'm now a QC at Matrix Chambers.

APPLAUSE

OK, the rules are the same as ever.

Ten points for starter questions.

You have to answer those individually on the buzzer.

Bonuses are team efforts for which you can confer,

they're worth 15 points.

OK, here's your first starter for ten, so fingers on the buzzers.

Said to be one of the top five works of fiction

that people are most likely to lie about having read...

War And Peace.

Yes, well done.

Right, the first set of bonuses, Kent, are on a newspaper.

Firstly, for five points, launched by a group of journalists

in 1986 under the slogan - "It is. Are you?" -

which newspaper's final print edition was published in March 2016?

-The Independent.

-The Independent.

We all agree, it's The Independent newspaper.

Correct. Which journalist and founder member

of The Independent became its first editor?

He subsequently served as president

of the British Board of Film Classification.

-Andreas Whittam Smith.

-OK, Jeremy to give you the answer, if I may,

cos I don't want to mispronounce it.

-Andreas Whittam Smith.

-Correct.

And, finally, in 1997, which editor of The Independent On Sunday

started a campaign to legalise cannabis and in doing so

earned herself the nickname Rizla Rosie?

I think that's Rosie Boycott.

It is. Ten points for this.

Printed by Jobbins of Holborn in the 1840s,

the first commercial Christmas card was condemned

in some quarters because it showed several members

of a family group doing what?

Drinking alcohol.

Correct.

Some temperance groups objected.

Here are your bonuses.

They're on Mary and Joseph, Kent.

When one keys "Mary" into Wikipedia's search bar,

the autocomplete possibilities include two ships.

One launched in 1511, the other in 1861, can you name both?

It's the Mary Rose and the Mary Celeste.

We think it's the Mary Rose and the Mary Celeste.

Correct. In addition to Goebbels and McCarthy,

which Yorkshire-born scientist appears when one keys "Joseph"

into the same search bar?

From 1772, he published six volumes of experiments and observations

on different kinds of air.

THEY CONFER

We've got a bit of debate going on,

but we think it's Joseph Priestley.

Correct, yes.

And, finally, Google autocomplete, on the other hand,

offers for "Joseph" which US actor noted for his roles in The Walk,

The Dark Knight Rises and Lincoln?

It's Daniel Day-Lewis in Lincoln,

The Dark Knight Rises is Christian Bale.

SHE WHISPERS

-Joseph...

-SHIULIE WHISPERS

Do you want to give it a go then?

I think Shiulie will have a bash at this one for us on our behalf.

-Joseph Gordon Levitt.

-Correct.

Whoa!

Ten points for this starter question.

Which writer used a personification of Christmas,

together with a group of his sons, with names including Misrule

and Minced-Pie in the work Christmas, His Masque,

presented to the court of James I in 1616?

You may not confer.

Shakespeare.

No.

Ben Jonson.

Ben Jonson is right, yes.

Right, your bonuses are on Christmas

as seen by the geek humour webcomic xkcd.

"I believe that since I don't observe Christmas,

"it can't have a definite date," says a character in an xkcd cartoon.

In what field of science does he claim to be engaged?

Is it quantum physics?

-It's all about...

-Yeah.

We're thinking quantum physics.

Yes, that's correct. It's a quantum entanglement joke,

physics would have done.

Right, five points for this.

"He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake

"he's copied on /var/spool/mail/root,

"so be good for goodness' sake."

This parody of a Christmas song

refers to which computer operating system?

THEY CONFER

That's an operating system.

That's a language. Unix?

-JAMIE:

-Unix, you want to go for?

If Jamie can give us this one.

-Try Unix.

-Yes, or Linux.

And, finally, in another xkcd cartoon, the character Megan

uses a home bio lab kit to pour first purple and then pink dye

over Christmas presents.

To what technique in microbiology does this refer?

I haven't got the foggiest, can anybody help?

Purple and pink, isn't it staining? Biological staining?

THEY CONFER

-They're the litmus colours.

-Litmus test.

Shall we go for litmus?

-JEREMY:

-OK.

After much conferring, we're thinking the litmus test.

No, it's Gram staining.

Right, we're going to take a picture round now with

about 17.5 minutes to go, so plenty of time.

Your picture starter is a diagram of a skeleton.

For ten points, simply give me the scientific name of the bone

which has been highlighted in red.

Pelvis.

What?!

Anyone like to buzz from Sussex?

You may not confer, but one of you can buzz.

Coccyx.

No. It's the sternum.

So, we'll take the picture bonuses in a moment or two,

fingers on the buzzers, here's another starter question.

Which two-word honorary title was bestowed for the first time

by Charles I on his daughter Mary in 1642?

It's conferred on a discretion...

Princess Royal.

Correct.

So, you lucky people get more turkey skeletons.

"The turkey is often consumed as part of Christmas celebrations,"

it says here, very helpfully.

Three more bones from the same skeleton for you to identify.

Again, I want the scientific name in each case, please.

Firstly...

-Don't ask me.

-HATTIE:

-Fibula, tibia.

-TIMOTHY:

-It's top of the leg.

-Top of the leg.

So is it the femur?

Femur? Femur.

It is the femur, yes. Secondly.

-TIMOTHY:

-So that's the top of the arm.

Yeah, there, just before the wrist, what's this called?

-HATTIE:

-Fibula, tibia?

Tibia?

No, it's the ulna. And finally...

I don't even know what that's attached to.

-TIMOTHY:

-So what would it be? Breastbone?

What about clavicle? I'm going to go with it. Clavicle.

Clavicle or furcula and the wishbone is what it is.

Simple language.

Right, ten points for this.

First sighted in Usenet in 2002,

what three-letter word is defined

as "to inflict a humiliating defeat, especially in an online game"?

Of uncertain etymology, though Welsh in appearance,

it rhymes with moan and groan.

It's own.

No, and since that was technically an interruption,

I'm going to have to fine you five points, I'm afraid.

One of you may buzz from Sussex.

-Clone.

-Buzz if you wish.

Clone.

No, it's pwn - PWN.

Right, ten points for this. Fingers on the buzzers.

Heat - How To Stop The Planet Burning

And Bring On The Apocalypse...

George Monbiot.

Correct.

Your bonuses, Kent,

are on the songs of Leonard Cohen, who died in November 2016.

"When I left they were sleeping I hope you run into them soon."

These words appear in which song by Cohen,

its three-word title being the name of a religious institute

of Catholic women founded in Dublin in 1831.

-Sisters Of Mercy maybe.

-Sisters Of Mercy, it is.

Sisters Of Mercy.

Correct.

Secondly,

"Sail on, sail on O, mighty Ship of State."

These words appear on which song of 1992,

sharing its one word title with both a novel of 1880

by Henry Adams and a form of government

pioneered in ancient Athens?

Is it Democracy?

-We're thinking Democracy.

-You're right.

And, finally,

"Now I've heard there was a secret chord

"That David played and it pleased the Lord."

These words appear in which song with a title

meaning praise the Lord?

That's got to be Hallelujah.

Correct.

Ten points for this starter question.

First broadcast in 1976, which comedy sketch originally had

the title Annie Finkhouse?

Set in a hardware shop, it centres around...

The Norwegian Parrot.

No, I'm afraid you lose five points,

it centres around the misunderstandings

between a shopkeeper and his somewhat irritating...

Four Candles.

Four Candles is correct, yes.

Annie Finkhouse, as in "anything else?"

Right, your bonuses are on 17th-century executions, Kent.

The elderly widow Lady Alice Lisle was the last woman in England

to suffer judicial beheading after being found guilty of

harbouring fugitives by the Bloody Assizes that followed which

aborted rebellion of 1685?

THEY CONFER

She wouldn't have harboured the peasants.

I mean, the peasants always revolted,

but I think that was much earlier.

Jacobin?

The Jacobin Rebellion.

No, it's the Monmouth Rebellion.

Secondly, executed after army mutinies at Banbury and

Bishopsgate in 1649,

James Thompson and Robert Lockyer were associated

with which radical political cause?

The Levellers?

Chartists were later, weren't they?

-We think it's the Levellers.

-It was the Levellers, yes.

And, finally, Thomas Winter and Sir Everard Digby

were among those executed after which failed enterprise

in the early 17th century?

Gunpowder Plot?

I mean, the only one we're coming up with is the Gunpowder Plot.

Well, you're right.

Right, we're going to take a music round now.

For your music starter, you're going to hear an excerpt from a song which

in November this year celebrated the 60th anniversary of its release.

For ten points, I want the name of the performer.

# Quand on n'a que l'amour

# A s'offrir en partage... #

Charles Trenet.

No, you can hear a little more, Sussex, if you like?

# Au jour du grand voyage Qu'est notre grand amour

# Quand on n'a que l'amour

# Mon amour toi et moi

# Pour qu'eclatent de joie

# Chaque heure et chaque jour

# Quand on n'a que l'amour

# Pour vivre nos... #

No idea?

My way.

No, I was looking for the name of the artist, Jacques Brel,

which rather renders pointless the tagline on that series of

music questions which was about famous Belgians.

LAUGHTER

Anyway, ten points for this starter question, music bonuses when

someone gets a starter question right, ten points for this.

Its place in so-called missing link history, challenged by fossils

discovered in China's...

Archaeopteryx.

Correct.

Right, Jacques Brel, whom we heard a moment or two ago,

had his career launched by that song that no-one managed to identify.

He stands, unfortunately, only at number four

in the list of top-selling Belgian music artists of all time.

Your bonuses are three more performers from that

eclectic list, firstly the name or stage name of the lead

vocalist here, born in a suburb of Brussels.

# Dominique, nique, nique

# S'en allait tout simplement

-# Routier, pauvre et chantant... #

-The Singing Nun, I think.

# En tous chemins, en tous lieux... #

I think she was known as the Singing Nun.

She was known... You didn't waste your time at university...

It was the Singing Nun, yes.

Secondly, this Belgian born instrumentalist.

JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS

Django Reinhardt. Django Reinhardt. Django Reinhardt, do we think?

Don't ask me.

I mean, it doesn't sound particularly Belgian,

but the only one we could think of was Django Reinhardt.

That's correct.

Finally, the performer usually associated with this track...

# Allez op un matin

# Une louloute est v'nue chez moi

# Poupee de cellophane cheveux chinois... #

You don't need to buzz... Give the answer any time you like.

It's back to our punk rock days, it's Plastic Bertrand.

Correct, yes.

APPLAUSE

Right, ten points for this starter question,

which historical figure is central to Mary Renault's trilogy of novels

entitled Fire From Heaven...?

Alexander The Great.

Correct.

Your bonuses are on a British mammal, Sussex.

Related to the badger, which native carnivore survives in Britain

mainly in forests of Scotland.

Around the size of a cat,

it has a distinctive light-coloured bib around the throat.

Pine marten.

Correct. The pine marten is sometimes called the sweet marten

to distinguish it from which similar animal,

also called a foul marten or foul mart,

that uses foul smelling secretions to mark its territory?

Skunk?

No, it's a polecat.

And finally, research in Ireland indicates that pine martens

reduce the numbers of which invasive mammal to the possible

benefit of the smaller native Sciurus vulgaris?

I want the two-word common name, please.

Grey squirrel.

Correct.

APPLAUSE

Ten points for this.

In English law, what two-word expression corresponds to

the New South Wales usage "Bondi tram"?

Both appear in legal fictions indicating the concept

of the reasonable person.

The man on the Clapham omnibus.

Correct, yes.

APPLAUSE

Your bonuses this time, Kent, are on an architect.

In 2015, a government decision to award a listed status to

a memorial building in Gerrards Cross

meant that all 44 of which architect's

First World War memorial buildings in England are now protected?

It's not Lytton somebody, is it? Lytton...? Am I thinking of...?

What's the geezer's name?

The big monumental...

Scott?

-Shall we go for Scott?

-Try Scott.

Scott.

No, it's Lutyens.

Lutyens' Royal Naval Division Memorial on Horse Guards Parade

bears lines by which poet, beginning,

"Blow out, you bugles, over the rich dead"?

He died on active service in 1915.

That's Rupert Brooke. Rupert Brooke. It's Rupert Brooke.

That's right. He was in the naval division.

And finally, Lutyens' Thiepval Memorial commemorates

over 72,000 missing soldiers of the United Kingdom and

South African forces who died during which offensive of 1916?

The Somme, wasn't it, '16? Was it Verdun?

Is it the Boer War?

No, it's the Great War. First World War.

I think it's the Somme but then we started the Somme to relieve

-the French at Verdun.

-Not 1600?

-1916. Somme, shall we say?

Battle of the Somme.

Correct. Ten points for this.

The first stage version

of which pantomime is generally

thought to have been written by Charles Dibdin,

performed at Drury Lane around Christmas 1819

and subtitled Harlequin And The Ogre?

Jack And The Beanstalk.

Correct.

APPLAUSE

You get a set of bonuses on the author Anita Brookner,

who died in March 2016.

Brookner's first published novel, A Start In Life,

tells the story of Ruth Vice, an authority on which French

novelist best known for The Human Comedy?

Balzac.

Balzac wrote The Human Comedy.

Balzac.

Correct. In 1967, Brookner became the first woman to hold

which professorship of fine art at Cambridge?

It was endowed by the founder of the school of art at

University College London.

Try...Turner or someone.

The name of an artist.

Turner.

No, she was Slade Professor of Fine Art.

And finally, Anita Brookner won the Booker Prize in 1984 for

which novel set near Lake Geneva?

I think Jeremy got there first on that one.

Hotel Du Lac.

Correct. We're going to take our second picture round.

For your picture starter, you're going to see a photograph of

a character from a television series.

For ten points, please name the actor.

Adam West.

It is Adam West, yes.

APPLAUSE

Adam West played Batman in the television series which began

broadcasting 50 years ago this year.

Your bonuses are three villains from that series.

For five points each, I'd like you to identify the actor in each role.

Here's the first.

That's Cesar Romero. They painted over his moustache.

Cesar Romero and you can see he refused to shave off his

moustache as the Joker and they painted over it.

-You are fond...

-Irritating, is the word you're looking for.

..of trivial knowledge.

-And you know what character he was playing, of course.

-The Joker.

Yes, he was playing the Joker. Secondly, who is this?

-Oh, that's Burgess Meredith.

-Burgess Meredith.

-Burgess Meredith.

-Yes. Playing which role?

-The Penguin.

-The Penguin is correct.

Finally, who's playing The Egghead?

Oh, that's Vincent Price.

It's definitely Vincent Price.

Vincent Price.

Well done.

APPLAUSE

Ten points for this. Fingers on the buzzers.

What form of progressive taxation was introduced in 1799?

-I didn't touch it.

-LAUGHTER

Income tax.

Well, are you claiming to answer the question or not?

Well, if the buzzer said I did... Income tax.

Well, I'll have to accept that.

Your buzzer did go

and it is the right answer.

Jammy.

You just go onto autopilot, I think.

Right, here are your bonuses on films associated with Christmas.

In each case, identify the film from the lines taken from it.

Firstly from a film released in 1946, "Just remember this,

"Mr Potter, that this rabble you're talking about, they do most

"of the working and paying and living and dying in this community."

It's...It's A Wonderful Life,

-the Frank Capra masterpiece.

-Correct.

In which animated film of 1993 are these lines sung?

"There's children throwing snowballs instead of throwing heads.

"They're busy building toys, and absolutely no-one's dead."

THEY CONFER

Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas.

Correct. And finally, which film, released in 1992,

includes the line, "Leave comedy to the bears, Ebenezer"?

Is it Scrooged?

Scrooged, Bill Murray, maybe.

-Do you want to?

-Give it a go.

We think it is Scrooged.

No, it's The Muppet Christmas Carol.

Two and a half minutes to go. Ten points for this.

In Austrian and German folklore, during the Christmas season

naughty children might be beaten and dragged to the underworld by

which mythological horned...?

Black Peter?

No, you lose five points.

By which mythological horned figure, half goat and half demon?

I'll tell you. It's Krampus. Ten points for this.

Born in 1955, which British film-maker's documentaries include

Hypernormalisation, The Power Of Nightmares and...?

Adam Curtis.

Correct.

APPLAUSE

These bonuses are on geology, Kent.

What agent is primarily responsible

for the formation of Aeolian landscapes?

Wind, is it? Aeolus was the god of wind.

Is it wind?

Yes, it is.

What five-letter German term denotes windblown deposits

of silt and fine siliceous dust?

THEY CONFER

How about "da vind"?

No, its "loess".

And finally, sand dunes are a feature of Aeolian landscapes.

What shape are barchan dunes?

THEY CONFER

Crescent.

Correct.

Ten points for this.

In industrial chemistry, what six-letter term

is the best-known trade name for PTFE or polytetrafluoro...?

Teflon.

Teflon is correct, yes.

Your bonuses, Kent, this time, are on early medieval history.

In each case, I need the year in which the following took place.

All three years end in two zeros.

Firstly, Pope Gregory the Great is widely recorded to have

stated that "God bless you" is a religiously correct response

to someone sneezing, in what year?

If it ends in 00, what would it be? 800, 900?

What do you reckon?

Medieval so 1100. 1000.

Let's have it, please.

GONG

And at the gong, Sussex University have 35

but Kent have 245.

-You were strangely mute, Sussex.

-Yes.

You never got a chance to get going. I'm sorry about that.

But thank you very much.

No-one made you do it and anyone, I think, watching will think

you're all good sports for taking part.

245, Kent.

It's only the second show but that is the highest winning score so

far so you may well come back as one of the four highest winning scores.

I hope you can join us next time

for another first-round match but, until then,

-it's goodbye from Sussex University... ALL:

-Goodbye.

-..it's goodbye from Kent University... ALL:

-Goodbye.

..and it's goodbye from me. Goodbye.