Episode 7 Unzipped

Hi, I'm Sam. Here's our check on the global news channels.

Breaking news on CNN: Israel has killed the top Hamas military

leader in an air strike in Gaza. A spokesman told BBC World News the

assassination was part of a wider operation.

Spain, Italy, Belgium, Greece and Al Jazeera covered strikes across

Europe. France 24 said it was over spending cuts. TVE showed riot

police in Madrid. Irish channels led on the death of

a woman who was refused an abortion. Newsline said her husband was told

it was because the foetus was alive and it's a Catholic country.

The moment a prince met a hobbit on New Zealand's TV3. Charles was

celebrating his 64th birthday. One News were at a party for sixty-four

Kiwis born on the same date. And look who's gone Gangnam style.

ABC called it red-hot Psy's stunning surprise. He turned up at

Madonna's New York gig and they performed in front of twenty

thousand fans. All the show biz in 45 minutes,

Apology for the loss of subtitles for 45 seconds

This programme contains some strong Unzipped is the show which asks a

Unzipped is the show which asks a Unzipped is the show which asks a

very important question to some of our favourite celebrities.

normal? Outrageous, unacceptable, immoral and wrong. Joining us this

week, Dagenham born Danny Dyer is an actor and father of two, most famous

for roles in British gangster movies. He doesn't think texting is

for proper geezers and only goes to bed when the alcohol runs out. Laura

Whitmore lives in London with her boyfriend. According to her report

she is useless at - will be answering some extremely

personal questions. Have you ever had sex at work? And revealing some

family secrets. I have caught boyfriend flirting with my Mom.

This is Unzipped. APPLAUSE

welcome to Unzipped. This is Russell welcome to Unzipped. This is Russell

Kane! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. Come on then. And that's Greg James.

CHEERING. And this is a show which isn't afraid to look celebrities in

the eyes and demand answers hard-hitting questions. And all

those questions come from Unzipped Report, which pull no, sir

punches in examining Britain's behaviour. Let's meet tonight's

victims, I mean special guests. Please welcome geezer and top fella

Danny Dyer. And her off the telly, Laura Whitmore! APPLAUSE. Both of

yous looking lovely. Welcome to the show, are you both braced and ready

to face the Unzipped inquisition? Not really. Let's have it. Is

there any unusual you want to admit to right now, get it out of the way?

Go on, you get it out the way. I'm normal. I'm hoping I will come

normal. We will discover any unusual habits. In a lift I like

do unusual faces and then stop just as the door opens. Does it ever

open just as you are doing it? Sometimes I don't get my trousers

done up in time. LAUGHTER. anything? A weird little thing, I

do love a bag of crisps, right. Most of us do, that's not weird.

But I can eat ten bags on a spin, easy. I noticed I tend to do

of origami with it, fold it into a nice bow. Imagine that: origami

crisp packets with me, Danny Dyer. Love them or hate them, families,

you are stuck with them. Our dysfunctional but very special

family are here, please Unzipped Sample! APPLAUSE. And

will have a little family for one of them later to know.

Before all of that, feast your eyes on what else is heading your way

tonight. Danny Dyer and Laura Whitmore, Unzipped. It's celebrity

versus normality, but who will come out on top? Find out in this week's

Reality Check. Granny and Grandad Unzipped, a shock for a girl in the

Unzipped Sample leads to surprising advice. Celebs Unzipped - which of

these faces sends rude messages to their family; and who has a problem

with other people's children? All will be revealed in tonight's

celebrity confessions. APPLAUSE. All that still to come. Hello guys,

let's have a chin wag before we decimate your character. What are

you up to at the moment? A couple of things, I'm going off to Bulgaria

to do a thing called Plebs, basically like the In Between but

set in ancient Rome. I play gladiator - don't laugh. I'm not

laughing yet. But a herbal tea drinking gladiator and I'm also

doing a film, I've got to speak French. Type cast. Can you speak

French? Of course not. I haven't got a clue what I'm doing. I'm

blagging it. My films go two ways, they are either brilliant or they

are shit and there's just no middle ground so fingers crossed.

footage we can show, because a lot of it is hard-hitting, if you are

easily offended, please turn off because we are showing full on

action with you going at it full frontal. Let's have a look at it.

What if it doesn't feel safe? What if it doesn't feel safe?

one way to find out. Right, how do look? Like a proper little madam.

Good looking woman. What was going Good looking woman. What was going

on there? Apart from of mine and Greg's average morning?

I knew there was going to be sort of bollocks going on here, I

knew it. Welcome to the show, you are going back to the jungle

soon. I am. Are you missing him? He used to be on your show in the

jungle. I am, there was a lot fun going on. I am going to miss

you, we had some fun. It's just so hot though. Remember Julia

with the thing up her skirt? Yes. It gets so hot that during adverts

they have those snakes like size - An air conditions pipe. And

Gillian McKeith shoved it up her skirt to cool the sweaty bits down.

You would not have wanted to be downwind of that. What do you

reckon the Irish version of this show would be like? Probably more

alcohol. We've already got a going on here but - Is there

Irish person in the audience? Did I hear a woo? Yeah, it's my cousin.

are all related. You were in Ireland recently, what did you

people? It's great, they are friendly, yes. Yes, very friendly.

Sometimes too friendly. Yes did you get in my room?", - it

doesn't matter. We are going to see how you compare with the rest of the

country. So it's time for Unzipped's most important

of all: Deirdre' Whitmore

'Tarquin Oliver Sebastian' Dyer, you normal? OK, so first one, Danny,

have you ever had sex at work? LAUGHTER. Obviously my

me having sex, right? Mm-hm. there was this one time when I done

a film with Gillian Anderson, right, and in the scene - what happened?

I couldn't get it up. In real life, I was aroused. LAUGHTER . So

basically, you know, I've got hump because I can't get it up,

is going "It's all right, babe", I roll off the bed and the rest of the

scene is played out with me on the edge of the bed. There's 40

in the room, remember, so a very surreal moment. Did she

you think? Well, of course she did, but it's an odd thing, it's so odd,

doing sex scenes, and give you a sock, you put your winkle

- LAUGHTER. And it has a little bit of string and you tie it up like

that, a little beige sock, sometimes they gaffer tape it to your leg, and

sometimes they say whack it out, crack on. Do you know what I mean?

No, I don't. Apart from on-screen, have you ever main in your caravan -

maybe? Not counting the sex scenes, no. Have you ever held hands on set

or anything? There have been some holding of hands. A know then? OK,

it's a yes. Done it at work! With my boyfriend though so it's fine.

Your boyfriend is in a band, isn't it, called the Peronis?

It's called the Coronas. OK, that's normal. 79% say they haven't had sex

at work. Have you seen your parents flirting? I have caught my

boyfriend flirting with my Mum but I think he was trying to get into

family. She quite enjoyed it. What was he doing, a neck massage

something? Is that nice, Mama Whitmore? That's exactly how he

talks. No, it was like: you look nice, have you had your hair done?

Which she had. I didn't even notice. I bet she is a sort though, your

mother. She is probably watching now and loving that you guys are

saying this what do you think about flirting being legalised in Ireland?

It's extremely abnormal that she flirted back. Your mum's a pervert.

It's just the way in Ireland, just the way. Danny, your daughter

is 16, right? You have a 16-year-old daughter? Your

is called Danny, isn't she? That was a short brainstorm, wasn't it?

Yes. Well, no, we was told we were having a boy so I was going with

Danny for a boy - you could have changed it. No, we stuck with

Danny. I can't even imagine it. I've got a pug called Colin. What's

it like with boys coming back? It's weird because recently she has asked

if her boyfriend can stay over he is a nice kid but I tell you

what, it fucking - all right, so imagine I'm 18, nerdy, lanky -

imagine. It's hard to imagine, Greg, yes. I'm 18, I'm interested

in Danny, your daughter, I'm going to come round your house -

even saying that, I'm gonna do you. It's roleplay, don't punch me. You

are going to ring the doorbell. will just get the shotgun. DOORBELL.

Hiya, is your daughter in? LAUGHTER Why? LAUGHTER. No reason, bye.

I wish it was that easy, I tell you. I wish it was that easy, I tell you.

That poor kid. Let's see if he is as pretty when he is floating in the

canal. I would love it if he is watching this show right now. He is

going to watch it and learn a few things, I tell you. Laura, have you

ever been clubbing with parents? Nightclubbing, not seal.

LAUGHTER. Glad I didn't answer that question, that would be awkward.

Look, there's a small one. Oh, so wrong. Yes, I have. I went

these awards in Dublin, it was the soap awards. Mummy Whitmore

over that. She was like get my picture with Ian Beale,

because that's their names in real life. Of course his name is

Woodyatt. Woodyatt. So you three went

clubbing? Steve McDonald was also there. That is not normal. I have

been clubbing with my Mum also. could leave them together. Yes,

doing lines of HRT in the corner. LAUGHTER. You seen Carole's hair

since she has been on the HRT? Only 15% of women are after

15% of women are after clubbing with their parents and that. Next

Have any of your social networking accounts got you into trouble? I'm

a bit too honest in this PC world. In PC World? Those Macs are too

expensive! Yes, basically, because I think the whole idea of Twitter is

you tweet what's going on in mind and that's not necessarily

good thing with me. No, I've about this thing where people go

phishing for celebrities, to get a bite, and I bite every time, me. I'm

a nightmare. We love your Twitter. Brilliant. It's some

tweets of all time, maybe. Go on, go on. So Laura, we are going

read out some of Danny's tweets, are going to do a blank and you have

to fill in the missing word. So basically lovely innocent activities

but made to sound proper hard, right?

What lovely innocent activity was Mr D Dyer talking about? I can't even

guess. A duck? Yay! Chucking bread into an empty lake with

daughter. You well hard wanker. Next one.

What were you trying to sort out? What were you trying to sort out?

What were you trying to sort out? What lovely, innocent activity was

What lovely, innocent activity was What lovely, innocent activity was

What were you trying to sort that, Laura? I'm going to struggle

here. I've got to stop this Twitter, hasn't it? Cross-trainer? I don't

know. No, the correct answer was "bush", right? OK, I wasn't even

close. Just see if I can through it because I've not

yet. Tried to sort my bush out. I had a lovely little chain saw. The

bleep was so powerful, it blew me. APPLAUSE. All right, one more.

Guess what Danny was talking about in this tweet. 's show in himself.

It's what goes on in my brain. It's what goes on in my brain.

Pigeons, I don't know. The correct answer was foxes on the roof of

shed. I can't believe the front of them. It's nature though. I swear,

I'm an animal nut. I bought my girls a Chihuahua, that's the thing.

man. They wanted him, they are out there munching, so they are out on

my shed, waiting. Imagine that on Springwatch. "I'm gonna tear apart

those fox wankers", so here is the verdict. That is not normal. Only 5%

of men have been in trouble due to their social networking account but

please don't stop. It brightens my day. That's the end of the

round. Thank you for being so honest, Laura and Danny. And we

probably should point out that anything you just said can and

be used against you later in the show when the Unzipped Sample

which of you is the most weird. I think we are starting to get the

measure of Laura and Danny but well do they know you lot at home?

We will be finding out very soon when they compete in this

Reality Check. If you want one your own then go to the

website after the show and complete our questionnaire. Want to know

more about the real you but can't afford a shrink? Fear not, simply

unzip yourself online and what you are really like. Keep

results secret or share with the world, that is your choice.

how you compare to me, Russell and other guests and this week learn how

geeky you are. Just answer some extremely personal questions and

will be revealed. Go to the website and click on Unzipped.

It's time to discover where our It's time to discover where our

celebrities are still keeping it real or whether they have

disappeared up their own botties. To find out, we introduce you to

something pretty unpleasant. So unpleasant you might need to use

anti-bacterial wipe afterwards. Yes, you are about to come

face-to-face with - tell them, Russell. Normal people! Follow us,

Please welcome tonight's "normal Please welcome tonight's "normal

people", Lauren and her brother Taylor. APPLAUSE. We thought we

would keep it in the family for tonight's Reality Check. Lauren, can

we just check a couple of things about you. Firstly how old are you?

24. How many brothers and sisters? Three brothers, three sisters.

come so many? My Mum was obviously keeping herself busy. How

you? 18. Gutted. I hear you recently confused about the sun and

the moon. I wonder how many people have worked out which region of

England you are from. Whoever proves most in touch with reality tonight

will get their hands on a unique prize so if you win tonight you will

get your hands on these VIPs, important prizes. Danny has kindly

donated a box set of his movies, his autobiography and a West Ham

that is similar to one that he actually owns. Just a little clip

from the autobiography to tease you here: the cat sat on the mat, then

we went to the beach, then we went home and when we woke up it was all

a dream. LAUGHTER. Laura has also donated some whisky, all the

from her home in Co Wicklow, Ireland. And a Laura Whitmore

calendar. AUDIENCE: Woo! I just got some pictures off her Facebook and

glued them on the side of a cereal packet. If you are ready, we will

hit the lights. Good, so question we asked the Great British public

big question: would you prefer to stop famine or be famous? What

percentage said they would rather be famous? Write your answers down,

please. Closest to the correct one will win. What do you reckon? In

other words, what percentage told the truth? Thin and famous,

everyone wins. That was a joke by the way. We love you, fatties. What

have you written, celebs? 65. Timmie and Taylor? Lauren and

Taylor. Whatever. We've expressed our answer as fuzzy felt. I can

reveal the% annual of people who would prefer to be famous is a

shocking 28% which means Laura and Danny win the round. So we asked

women what they were most likely to lie about in everyday life. Here

the options: job, happiness, relationship, diet. I don't know, I

reckon diet. Is that sexist? can't pretending to like you be

the list? Celebs, time is up. Diet and a smiley face. Diet. Tommy and

Lily, you've gone with diet as well. You have got the names wrong again.

Taylor and Lawrence. No. reveal the top answer that women

about is happiness. That's really sad. So that's why I'm happy and

life is probably so often followed by a tear-stained goodbye letter.

Happiness is followed by diet, relationship and finally job,

means that over a third of all women in our lives are not

they are sad liars. What do you lie about most in life, do you reckon?

I'm a terrible liar, the worst in the world. Lying right now.

Lauren, what about you? Lying about being hungover at work with your

head in the bin under the desk. Danny, what do you lie about?

an actor, I always lie. You just grassed yourself up though. No one

at work will watch this programme. I meant they are rather stuck up so

they won't watch something like this, all right? Next question: what

percentage of people said that would intervene if they witnessed a

mugging? If I see that, I have to step in. I often run up and go "Stop

it", and then run away. What percentage do you think? I reckon

quite low, 19. There's a lot of shitters out there. It's a mug's

game, isn't it? Terry, Lucy, have you got? Taylor and Lauren.

45% 45%. I can now reveal the percentage of people who would

intervene in a mug something a very impressive 80%. The other 20%

the ones doing the course. That means Terry and Adam

you win the round. Lauren and Taylor win! APPLAUSE. If you saw

someone being mugged in real would you step in? Of course I

would. Especially if it was an old girl. What if it was me?

think I would just crack on, I think. Join in? Yes, I think I

would stick the boot in if it happens. Obviously you are

amazing actor and I wanted to to you about a bit of acting I have

been doing. I have been writing, directing, acting in my own Brit

gangster movie. I wondered would take a look at this trailer

and let me know what you think. Love to.

# So messed up # So messed up

you are pathetic, pay up you useless # In my room, I want you here #

Sorry. Sorry.

you are pathetic, # Now we are gonna be face-to-face #

It's time for the main event. TICKING. Go.

Yes! APPLAUSE

So what's your one-word review of So what's your one-word review of

that? LAUGHTER. Dog shit. Ha ha! Sorry, that's out of order. Dick.

Please don't punch me. At the end of that game I can reveal that the

who were most in touch with the British public is - it's a draw,

it's both of you. Amazing. I like to think that I in some way can

break down the sociological barriers that sadly divide elitist

celebrities from scum. Still to come tonight, celebrity professions

from some of the biggest names in showbiz, and Joe Swash. Yes, but

not before we tell you something guarantee you won't have heard

before about people like Laura Danny. Let's hope Danny's kids

aren't watching tonight. Turns that Londoners are more likely to

wish their children were better looking than anyone else in Britain.

And here are some more snapshots from the Unzipped family album. In

Scotland 38% of people think you are never too old to give Mummy and

Daddy a kiss on the lips much 10% of the UK confess to fancying one of

their own relatives. And single girls are more attractive to guys

who remind them of their old man, which should be a relief for Laura's

boyfriend and her Dad. Hello, darling. APPLAUSE.

We are talk being family tonight and I have a tricky question now for

Laura. TEXT MESSAGE ALERT. Your phone is not on. That is so

unprofessional. Danny, after the show, right. Yes, that

pub with a pool table I was you about. We will have a good night

out. So we are going to ask Laura - I will just check my phone actually.

The signal is down. Oh, you've merged the drinks because you and me

were going out. You and me can our ten-minute break and then we

will cricket will

will crack on. Do you know what, I will make it easy for you. I won't

be there because I'm not even to be here now. We've got

minutes left. I probably could do it on my own but - Do you know what,

was only messing around, I've got five bars, you dick. Sorry,

got to deal with it. Do you know what, listen. I'm going to deal with

this. Don't worry about it, I will sort this right out. Someone

Oi, plumb. What? I've seen you Oi, plumb. What? I've seen you

doing this shit every week, walking off the show. What's the matter with

you? What's the matter is Greg is supposed to be my mate. Shut your

mouth. You need to man up a bit. Look at you, you are pathetic. What

kind of geezer wears that, and what about the make-up.

Get a grip, you look like a bird. We had Russell Brand poncing about,

then Russell Howard, now we got you? Now, I'm going to keep it very

simple: do you want to look in front of the whole country? No.

Sorry, I can't hear you. No Danny, of course I don't. Right, so let's

go and do this. Right, let's the shit out of it, yeah? Watch

your language, we are on the BBC. BLEEP

APPLAUSE. Sorry about that, Danny APPLAUSE. Sorry about that, Danny

wanted to know about birds and football and metal and meat and

stuff like that. Cheers, Dan. pry into our guests' private lives.

Are you close to your family? I but they are all in Ireland so I'm

close except there's a big sea in between us. Do your

everything you do? No, because they are not watching this right now

hope. My Mum stalks everything do. She does. She has me on Google

alerts which is never good. Danny, you have been with your partner for

20 years, how come you have not got married? 22 years. I just think

them days of the old school are gone. It's her day, it's not

the geezer. I just want to get everyone a bed, get my nan a bed and

then start right having it, and I mean? So this is where

Russell goes into the Unzipped Sample but tonight it's different

because I thought I might do it tonight to get some thoughts from

them. All right? Try it for one week. Hold on, what does he do? Get

me my baton of mirth. Oh my God. You are fifth, aren't you? What is your

name? Vicky. Hi. Do you talk to your parents about sex? Mmm,

sometimes, yes, she doesn't really have a choice because I'm always on

the phone talk being it so she has to listen. You are quite open?

Yes. What about your grandparents? Yes - I wish there was

could talk to them about some stuff on the show. Shut up. Earlier on

this week I caught up with your Granny and Grandad. You never! I

did, yes. Say hello to Alan and Eileen. There they are, and Alan and

Eileen have been in love for years. Hiya. So we thought Vicky,

you could benefit from experience about personal matters.

What do you reckon? OK, oh my God, let's do it, yeah. One thing I

mentioned is that when you to be in the audience we said we

needed personal stuff about you for research purposes but

reason is we are going to use questions and put them to your

grandparents and they are going to give us some answers. So we

them all about your exploits. You never! I did. I did. So what's your

love life like? Are you in love? Am I heck. No one will have me. Well,

they do and then they get a bit bored, I think, or yeah,

bored. I can't imagine they are bored. I'm hard work really, I

think. So you were a rep in Zante once? Yes. Were you well-behaved?

No. What happened? A you know. The number went up, didn't

it? I don't know. LAUGHTER. you know. Got drunk a lot, didn't

get much sleep. And pretended to do your job and didn't really, that

kind of thing. OK, well we heard that you weren't shy about flashing

your boobs, so how did Grandad react to this news? They

actually wouldn't be probably surprised, I think. OK, A: shock add

disgusted. B: a family tradition. It is, they've all got boob jobs

apart from me. Or C: they were relieved it was only your boobs you

flashed. B: family tradition. as you know, it's a family trait,

have two daughters in law fond of the same thing. We treat it

as a bit of fun. I'm not sure about granddaughters, but

daughter-in-law, it's lovely. LAUGHTER. I feel like that's a bit

weird. Is it weird? It is a bit, isn't it. So you were right, it's a

family tradition. Next one: have you ever fallen asleep during sex?

Yeah. What happened? Just really, really drunk and

asleep. It happens. Yeah. Just once? Yes, I think so, but then

like I fell off the bed. Yeah. So we told your Granny and Grandad

about this. Thanks Greg, yes. Obviously. What do you think the

advice was to stop it happening again? A: make sure you have coffee

before getting frisky. B: sleep with more exciting people. Or C:

should read 50 Shades of Grey? 50 Shades of Grey, 100%. Yes, my Granny

like that is. OK. LAUGHTER . Good luck everyone. Let's see what they

said. Whilst on holiday I've just read the three books of 50 Shades of

Grey. LAUGHTER. If you haven't already read them I think you might

be able to pick up a few tips to keep things interesting in the

bedroom. Lots of tips. Lots of tips. They introduced silver balls

and so you know what Granny is like, I actually bought her some but they

had to be gold because Granny is not a silver person, is she? I was

bit worried about not being able to retrieve them afterwards, but you

know, you are younger and fitter and you might manage with

right. LAUGHTER. Laura, do you think that's good

advice for not getting sleepy in the bedroom? Do you know what, I

haven't read the book yet but I think on your Granny's advice that

maybe is beneficial. You've got hot grandparents though, haven't you?

They are gorgeous, aren't they. She is so glam. Your grandfather is

good looking man. We asked what was the secret to a happy

relationship? What did Granny and Grandad say: it's all about

tolerance and low expectations? about compromise, or C: it's

lots of sex and laughter. What do you reckon? Lots of sex and

laughter, yeah. I would probably go for that too. LAUGHTER. Well, I

think, Victoria, that the secret a happy relationship, as you know,

with Grandad and I is we enjoy our sex life and we laugh and laugh a

lot, both in the bedroom the bedroom. And we trust each

other. And as you get older, of course, the more laughs you have in

the bedroom. It's not as serious it is when you are young like you.

Because the bones don't bend. LAUGHTER. Make him stop, Greg! Make

it stop! Ah! Can't believe that. And we will never, ever unsee that.

Ever. That was amazing. They are brilliant, aren't they? They do

seem properly amazing. Thank you. No, thank you, and

and Grandad, I think we've heard some very valuable advice there.

That was amazing. Everyone, Alan and Eileen. APPLAUSE.

Now, it's time for a crucial moment in the show based on what we've

heard from Laura and Danny tonight. It's time for you to decide which of

them, Danny and Laura, is the least normal. If you think Laura is

having the devilment about her, cheer now. SILENCE. I could at

least have one person. Thanks. If you think Danny, cheer now.

CHEERING. Well done, Danny, you the weirdest this week. How do you

feel about being awarded this honour? I'm actually over the moon,

thank you. Thank you so everybody. Do you mean the moon or

the sun? The sun. You are going to believe this

not the end of the drama on tonight's show because Laura and

Danny are about to try and win everyone in tonight's audience

alcohol. CHEERING. No pressure, no pressure whatsoever.

It's time for last orders at the Entertainment Arms, because this

If Laura and Danny do the business If Laura and Danny do the business

If Laura and Danny do the business tonight, the entire Unzipped

tonight, the entire Unzipped tonight, the entire Unzipped

If Laura and audience will hit the

get their hands and mouths on a very special cocktail. AUDIENCE: Woo!

Say hello to the carousel of celebrity. There it is. Her, her,

him and her as well. Yes, Greg. LAUGHTER. Laura and Danny,

the rules are really simple. Get more questions right than wrong.

Sorry. Miss Whitmore? Yes. And Mr Sorry. Miss Whitmore? Yes. And Mr

Dyer. Yes. I can almost smell tension so let's find your first

celebrity. Spin it please. Shout stop whenever. Stop - that

Irish by the way. We asked Essex vajazzler if she believes in aliens,

do you think she does or doesn't? I think she believes in most

would say yes. OK, look, does that face believe in aliens? I'm

with these guys, these guys with these guys, these

with these guys, these guys know. That's a yes. Do you know what, my

friend actually saw an alien so after that story

believe in aliens. LAUGHTER. Doing well, doing well. That was correct.

Next one. Cheeky spin. Stop. There he is. We asked TV presenter Rick

Edwards if he would donate sperm to a single friend who was desperate to

have a baby. Do you think he said yes or no? Audience, what do you

reckon? He is a nice guy. I'm going to say yes. Yes. Go for it,

let's have a look. I would donate my sperm to fucking anyone. LAUGHTER

a lovely, generous guy. Legend. a lovely, generous guy. Legend.

one more for the booze. Spin that wheel. OK, stop now. Didn't stop

very quick for you, Greg. Swash. For the booze, the Joe Swash question.

We asked Joe Swash if he finds other people's children annoying. Did

say yes or no? AUDIENCE: Yes. He a nice kid - Yes, he is lovely

I think he may find - You know best. But I think no kid

match up to his kid. I'm going to say yes. Let's find out. Do other

people's children annoy me? they do. They do annoy me, and they

really frustrate me as well. It's terrible to say this, but ugly

children annoy me. It's like it's their own fault, like they've done

something to be ugly, yes. terrible. APPLAUSE.

And an amazing answer but thing is, it's correct and you've

won the alcohol for here. CHEERING.

Amazing news. Thanks to you, everyone in the audience tonight

wins a cocktail! CHEERING. That's all the time we have been

allotted on BBC Three this evening. A big thank you to our special

guests Laura Whitmore and Kevin Doyle.