Lynn and Liam Don't Tell the Bride


Lynn and Liam

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Transcript


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Let's just clip the shoes together and make a wish.

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Every girl dreams of her wedding.

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I want to be you now.

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But what happens when she has no say on her big day?

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Don't Tell The Bride is back.

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This is all for the name of love.

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12 gallant grooms are taking control...

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..with £12,000 a piece...

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Give it to me.

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..and just three weeks to organise a wedding.

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What an absolute idiot.

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They're more daring...

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Why are we here?

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..more ambitious...

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Why has he done this?

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..and more outrageous than ever before.

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-Ah!

-It's not a joke.

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Ah!

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Will the glass slipper fit?

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-Oh, my word.

-Hell, no.

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Will true love conquer all?

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Horrid, horrid, horrid.

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Oh, my God, it's going to be on a beach.

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And will there be a fairy-tale ending?

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Oh, my God, I don't like it. Ah!

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Is it the right ring?

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Turn that camera off?

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Or just a damsel in distress?

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Wishes do come true.

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Sometimes they don't.

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Tonight, UFO believer, Liam...

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Come into my house.

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..plans an alien wedding that's out of this world...

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We're Men In Black. It's a military, covert operation.

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..for his super sensible bride, Lynn.

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Oh, Liam.

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While she's dreaming of a princess wedding...

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I can imagine Liam and I walking up here.

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..Liam's vision is light years away.

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Ladies and gentlemen, aliens and government personnel.

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That's not a typical wedding flower.

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This isn't a typical wedding.

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Can this space-cadet groom...

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Go, go, go!

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..convince his down-to-earth bride...

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That's awful.

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..he's not on another planet?

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This is what my mind looks like.

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-To Liam.

-Liam!

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Will this wedding make it into orbit...

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Look, there's loads left to do.

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..or will it be lost in space?

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-I'm not wearing it.

-Liam, I hate you.

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If it's a joke, he'll be in big, big trouble.

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Epsom item Lynn and Liam made sweet music together

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when they first met at a festival.

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I saw her big green eyes staring from a distance, like a cat.

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Meow.

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We went back to my "love tent", shall I call it.

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It was, yes, but it wasn't quite like that, was it?

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We just carried on talking.

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We were talking and then, it was magical.

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-Or spiritual, should I say?

-Spiritual.

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It's like when we slot together, our souls entwined.

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Five years on, they're a family of four

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with baby daughter Elloise,

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and Daniel, Lynn's 11-year-old son from a previous relationship.

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We have a perfect family.

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Yes, we do have a perfect family.

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We do have a perfect family.

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But legal secretary and mum Lynn doesn't just look after the kids.

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She also has to take care of Liam.

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He doesn't need to be organised

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because I do everything for him. I think for him.

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I phone him ten times a day.

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"Have you rung the doctors? Have you rung the bank?

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"Have you done this? What time are you going to be home?

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"What are we having for dinner?"

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I'm on the phone to him so much he doesn't need to think for himself.

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Lynn is a human list. She writes everything as a list.

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I love to make lists because it just keeps me organised.

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I can start a list and I'll probably keep writing it

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for the next couple of days because I add things to it.

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I don't know how anyone functions without using a list.

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But this couple aren't just worlds apart

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when it comes to the daily routine.

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Electrician Liam is in a universe all of his own.

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I believe aliens have been playing a part of human civilisation,

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existence, from the beginning of time. They control the world

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and the government and the government's hiding that from us.

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MUSIC: "The Imperial March" by John Williams

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When I was a kid I saw a UFO.

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It was above a football stadium.

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Lights all twirled around.

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I thought I was going to get abducted then.

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Zipped off, pew, gone.

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Liam is definitely not normal. There is not one person

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who has crossed Liam's path that would call him normal.

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Seeing if it was UFO sky out there.

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You just don't know.

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You just might catch a glimpse of one.

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He just comes out with these strange theories, but I love him.

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He's just lovely and perfect the way he is.

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Liam's head may be in the clouds, but his heart's in the right place

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and when it comes to the wedding, family comes first.

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I think Liam and I getting married will make my son Daniel

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look at Liam with a little bit more security.

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I think that he will see Liam as his stepdad and not just my boyfriend.

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All right.

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It will make us a family.

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Super-organised Lynn has super-high standards for her special day.

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My wedding would have to be fit for a Queen.

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I want it to be stunning.

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And she has a list for that too.

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Silk place mats. Personalised favours.

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Bouquets of lilies on every table. Guest book and photo booth.

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Creme brulee is quite nice.

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Not to worry, Liam has his own list for the big day,

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but it's all in his head.

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With this wedding, I want Lynn to understand exactly

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what's going on in my mind.

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I want her to be a part of my mind.

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Aliens.

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Conspiracy theories.

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I want her to, just for that one day,

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be a part of my mind.

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I want her to fall in love with my mind.

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But will the alien vision in Liam's mind

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be enough to seduce his super-sceptical bride?

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There's no pressure, but...

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Thanks.

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I really want the best day of my life.

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When I think about it I feel a little bit of...

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You know, that feeling inside.

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This is a big thing. This is my wedding day.

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I'm not going to have another one. You know.

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Don't ruin it.

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No. Have faith. Have faith, my child.

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Yeah.

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It's time for Lynn and Liam to say goodbye.

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Are you going to miss me?

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Yeah, of course I'm going to miss you, darling.

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Are you going to be stressed?

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I don't do stressed. I'm going to be focused.

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The next time they'll see each other will be in three weeks,

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on their wedding day.

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Say goodbye to Daddy.

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Bye-bye.

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-Love you.

-Love you, darling.

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Bye-bye.

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Liam will spend the next three weeks at his uncle's house.

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This day means everything to me.

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It means so much that our family unites.

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I just want a nice, beautiful, stunning wedding

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that we can look back on and be proud of,

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not look back on and it's a joke.

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It's not a joke.

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Liam just wants Lynn to understand what makes him tick,

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and what makes him tick is, well...aliens and stuff.

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He's out UFO-spotting with old school friend and best man Simon,

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to share his vision.

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It's like I want Lynn to have a glimpse of what is actually

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going on in my mind, so that she can actually understand the real me.

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All my theories of government conspiracies, aliens, UFOs.

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Imagine being in my mind for one day?

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I can't imagine that for one second.

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But that's what it's going to be like.

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How do you foresee this working, Liam?

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Imagine an underground, top-secret military base

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-that no-one knows about.

-Right.

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Having the wedding there and it's like a covert operation.

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Alien cover-up. I can see it. I can see it in my mind.

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Imagine you got beamed up in a spaceship,

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what would it actually look like on that spaceship?

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Lights going on.

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These rooms off the side where there's alien autopsies going on.

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As she goes further in, it's strange.

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Suddenly it opens out into this magical, wonderful grotto.

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An alien one.

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An alien grotto. If she doesn't marry you, I will.

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It's a wedding plan, but not as we know it.

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Back in the real world,

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Liam's sister Kirstie is being probed by Lynn

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about her wedding five years ago.

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It was really beautiful weather, wasn't it?

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It was a gorgeous day. Getting married for me was important

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because I wanted to have the same name as my children.

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-Also, just to make us a proper unit.

-Exactly.

-You know.

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That's why it's so important to us. We've got two children now.

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Obviously Daniel's from a previous relationship

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and so it means even more that we can come together

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as a family of four, with Elloise,

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and sort of be, you know, a unit, a family unit.

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I think it will be good for Daniel as well.

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It's nice for him to know and have that security

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that we're married. That's never, ever going to change.

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He's got a mum and he's got another dad.

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I can't wait to get married. Can't wait.

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I know, you know, it is important to have the sort of day you want,

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but there is a reason why you're doing it

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and that is all that matters.

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Exactly. It's going to be a very emotional day.

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I know that I'm going to be crying a lot.

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Yeah, I think I'll be crying as well.

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Hopefully, through happiness.

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Yes, and not through wanting to kill him!

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Would I let Liam plan my wedding? Never.

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I wouldn't let Liam plan anything for me.

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He has one shot at this, to get this right.

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God help him if he doesn't.

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No pressure then.

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Liam has started his hunt for the perfect wedding venue.

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Imagine, like, a top-secret military base.

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Army soldiers and that all lined up at the side here.

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I basically want to recreate a government conspiracy

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of the existence of aliens

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that is being hidden from everyone's prying eyes.

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It doesn't get much more hidden than a Second World War bunker

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buried 70 feet under ground. He's brought brother Ciaran

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and best mate Simon to check out the unusual venue.

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-Hi, guys.

-How are you doing, mate? Liam. Nice to meet you.

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-So which one of you is the groom?

-I'm the groom, I'm Liam.

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So you want to get divorced that quick?

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It's all right, isn't it?

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All right. It's every girl's dream wedding venue.

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-See what you think. Let us know.

-Cool.

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-Thank you very much.

-Which way shall we go?

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This way.

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That way.

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MUSIC: "Bonkers" by Dizzee Rascal

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It definitely looks the part.

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I can see by looking down these tunnels and stuff, it's exactly...

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That's what I don't understand, what can you see? I don't get it.

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I can't see what you're seeing.

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Basically, when they're going to walk in, you know,

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they have these different sections.

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Maybe lead them through, they've gone through the wrong way.

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They're like, "Ah, what's going on?"

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There's an alien there having an autopsy.

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-Do you know what I mean, leading through.

-OK.

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So potentially what you're saying is, this is like the journey

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-to the ceremony?

-Yes.

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I understand. All round here you've got all weird things going on?

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-Yeah.

-You wouldn't actually get married in this space here?

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Not in this section here. No.

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OK. So let's go look for a place.

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-We need a bigger room?

-Exactly.

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-Shall we hunt some more?

-Yeah.

-Let's do it. Go!

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In a parallel universe, Lynn has arrived at the venue

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she's dreamed of since she was a little girl

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with her cousin Leah and mum Heather.

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Wow, look at the chair covers.

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And look the candles up and down the thing, that's what I want.

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What a lovely view out the window as well.

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The room's just so big and luxurious, isn't it?

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It's so light and airy and so spacious.

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Some ceremony rooms can be very poky

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and you've got your guests standing around the side.

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Plenty of room for an aisle, isn't there?

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It's just elegant. I'd feel really deflated, probably more so

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than I imagined, because this is a dream. This is a dream.

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It's my dream.

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You just don't know what you're getting,

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that's the hard thing, isn't it?

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The best thing to do is to expect the worst.

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Come here. Ah.

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The worst. Like, say, a pitch black, rat-infested hole in the ground.

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Listen.

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DOOR CREAKS OPEN

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Come into my house.

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If you were a woman, what would you think?

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Ah, mate. Seriously, you'd be sleeping on the settee.

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She's marrying me for who I am, and this is who I am.

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This is what I'm going to do. This is my mind.

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Right here, look.

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Seriously, she's going to be angry.

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Got to...jazz it up.

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Jazz it up!

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What are you going to do, put up a couple of fairy lights up there?

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It's the space.

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You're thinking too traditional.

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Why can't people just be, like, standing, you know, like this.

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Like this. "We're Men In Black. We ain't got no emotion.

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"We're just like that."

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It's a military, covert operation going on.

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Oh, sugar.

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I understand where his imagination is, but it's a dump.

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Even though we want to do a very weird and wonderful ceremony

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and I said I'm with him 100%, it's still a ceremony that...

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I think that he needs to respect the ceremony.

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Wow.

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I can imagine Liam and I walking up here and just having photos.

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It's like a fairy tale.

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This is perfection, but that's not Liam.

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It wouldn't be quirky enough for Liam.

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No. The thing is, he would want people to remember it,

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but it would be for completely different reasons to you,

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wouldn't it? It wouldn't be because it's so beautiful and stunning.

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It would be because it's hilarious and different and unique.

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I would kill him if it was not taken seriously.

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I would be so upset. I love him and I trust him for a reason.

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I don't think he will take it as a joke.

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But whether or not he will take it as seriously as I take it,

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I don't know.

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But because I've had my heart set on this place for so long,

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I know if it's not perfect, I will be disappointed.

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If he is taking the mick, or if it's a joke,

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he'll be in big trouble. He will be in big, big trouble.

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# I smell trouble ahead of me. #

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It's just the smell of earth.

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It smells a lot worse down here.

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It smells like badger poo.

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It stinks down there, mate. Go and have a sniff.

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Yeah, but I'll get air freshener.

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We'll help you, no matter what, at the end of the day.

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I would like to just always try and be realistic at the same time.

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Can we just look at other possibilities, please?

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It's exactly what I was thinking of, what I imagined in my head.

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Even as I'm coming out I'm getting covered,

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it's like a rainforest out here.

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Bye. See you later, lads.

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MUSIC: "Sound Of The Underground" by Girls Aloud

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I can't think of anybody who'd want their bride, realistically,

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to get married in a dirty old World War II bunker.

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There's rats down there, fungus, all sorts of horrible things.

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You'd be looking at a divorce from day one.

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Although Liam loves the bunker, his best men have persuaded him

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to look at a slightly more practical wedding venue.

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An ex-high-security military air base, of course.

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But their first stop is another bunker.

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Oh, dear.

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If you can imagine it, it is secret location.

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It's protected by this grass, that you can't see from above.

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Blank out the back a bit.

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Flowers and candle stands all the way down or something like that.

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Bit of music.

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Good sweep out.

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Good sweep out. Do you reckon we'd be allowed to get the minister

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in prosthetics, so you're getting married by an alien, going...

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HE MAKES SLURPING NOISES

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Trust me. You can make anything look beautiful.

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Anything, really?

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MUSIC: "Ghost Town" by The Specials

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He's sold on this bunker for a blessing to welcome his bride

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into Liam's world.

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All he needs now is somewhere large enough

0:16:380:16:40

to hold the ambitious alien reception to complete his vision.

0:16:400:16:44

Nice.

0:16:440:16:45

Nice.

0:16:450:16:46

It feels like an aircraft hangar

0:16:460:16:48

that could have potentially have held a flying saucer, an alien spaceship.

0:16:480:16:54

Quite possible.

0:16:540:16:56

That looks wicked, that thing.

0:16:560:16:57

That's where you want to do your entrance coming in,

0:16:570:17:00

smoke, lights, and then the tables set up, like, all round.

0:17:000:17:04

So when we come down, like, if I run down here...

0:17:040:17:08

Then we walk down, like this,

0:17:100:17:14

and then, "Ladies and gentlemen, aliens, and government personnel,"

0:17:140:17:20

and then strange things. It's maybe an alien in there

0:17:200:17:23

looking at us, we're the experiment.

0:17:230:17:25

Like, "look at these humans, how they act.

0:17:250:17:27

"They act really strangely." In there, there's like

0:17:270:17:30

an alien autopsy with that black light.

0:17:300:17:34

We can get luminescent stuff, like the blood coming out.

0:17:340:17:38

It's luminescent, like...

0:17:380:17:39

Government personnel. Everyone's here, the Men In Black, ain't they?

0:17:390:17:43

Everyone's wearing sunglasses everywhere, with their earpieces,

0:17:430:17:46

just standing around all the time. It's going to look like,

0:17:460:17:48

"What's going on," like.

0:17:480:17:50

-I like it though.

-Soldiers.

0:17:500:17:51

Soldiers. You know, out the front of here.

0:17:510:17:54

No, I like it. It's cool.

0:17:540:17:55

Considering what Liam wanted, I think it's spot-on.

0:17:550:17:58

Just looking around. It's almost like it was made for him.

0:17:580:18:01

So Liam forks out just under two grand for a deserted military venue

0:18:030:18:08

that he plans to transform

0:18:080:18:10

into alien conspiracy-linked US security base Area 51.

0:18:100:18:14

I know it don't sound romantic what I'm doing,

0:18:170:18:21

but it is if she's seeing a part of me.

0:18:210:18:24

It's like people believe in God.

0:18:240:18:27

They have strong beliefs in God and no matter what people say to them,

0:18:270:18:32

their faith always, you know, pulls through.

0:18:320:18:36

They say, "No, this is what I believe."

0:18:360:18:41

I'm exactly the same, but with aliens.

0:18:410:18:45

I just think aliens are our gods.

0:18:450:18:47

# I saw Elvis in a UFO... #

0:18:470:18:51

With the venue secured,

0:18:520:18:54

Liam's drawing inspiration from sci-fi film Men In Black

0:18:540:18:58

for his big day.

0:18:580:18:59

Will Smith wasn't available, so he's come to the local am-dram society

0:18:590:19:04

looking for actors.

0:19:040:19:05

If you can imagine like a government conspiracy.

0:19:050:19:08

That the government are hiding the existence of extraterrestrials

0:19:080:19:12

and, basically, we're going to get married by an alien.

0:19:120:19:15

THEY LAUGH

0:19:170:19:18

OK.

0:19:200:19:21

So I was thinking first

0:19:230:19:25

you could all try and play one of the Men In Black.

0:19:250:19:30

HE MAKES STRANGE HISSING SOUNDS

0:19:330:19:35

Sorry, this is a restricted area.

0:19:380:19:40

Yeah, I like that.

0:19:400:19:42

Look at that intestine.

0:19:420:19:43

THEY LAUGH

0:19:430:19:45

THEY LAUGH

0:19:520:19:55

Liam books a total of 15 actors for £150

0:20:030:20:06

and, with a few of his own mates,

0:20:060:20:09

he's got his army of government agents.

0:20:090:20:11

But he doesn't stop there.

0:20:130:20:15

By the end of week one, Liam's spending goes stratospheric

0:20:150:20:19

as he blows £300 on alien flowers.

0:20:190:20:22

That's not a typical wedding flower.

0:20:220:20:24

This isn't a typical wedding.

0:20:240:20:26

£400 on spacey special effects.

0:20:260:20:28

COUGHING

0:20:280:20:29

We're getting married by an alien.

0:20:290:20:31

My God. An alien!

0:20:310:20:34

-An alien is going to actually marry you?

-Yes.

0:20:340:20:37

And another £600 on military muscle motors.

0:20:370:20:40

SIREN WAILS Let's go, go, go!

0:20:400:20:43

Nearly halfway through wedding planning, Liam is back to work

0:20:460:20:50

with a bump. He's at work and the pressure's beginning to tell.

0:20:500:20:54

The whole process is hard, trying to live your normal life.

0:20:540:20:58

Obviously, trying to plan a wedding in three weeks is tough,

0:20:580:21:03

tough going. It's not, you know, easy.

0:21:030:21:07

It's hard not seeing Lynn and the kids.

0:21:070:21:10

Obviously... Do you know what I mean?

0:21:100:21:13

You miss them every day. It's lonely at times.

0:21:130:21:17

Sometimes you just want a hug. Do you know what I mean?

0:21:170:21:21

That reassurance that everything's all right, but...

0:21:210:21:25

you can't.

0:21:250:21:27

For once, Liam is thinking more family than alien fantasy,

0:21:300:21:34

but he's about to have his own close encounter of the stag-do kind.

0:21:340:21:41

Ahhhhh!

0:21:470:21:49

Beam him up! Beam him up!

0:22:000:22:02

From alien abductions...

0:22:040:22:06

Oh, Liam.

0:22:060:22:08

..to alien transformations.

0:22:080:22:10

This is my worst nightmare.

0:22:130:22:15

Liam's planned a night out in London for the girls.

0:22:150:22:18

-To Liam.

-Liam!

0:22:180:22:20

His choice of extraterrestrial make-up is leaving them

0:22:210:22:24

a bit green about the gills.

0:22:240:22:26

Liam, I hate you. I absolutely hate you.

0:22:270:22:30

I can't believe he's done it. This is not what Lynn wanted at all.

0:22:300:22:34

Not at all.

0:22:340:22:35

I bet he didn't go dressed as an alien on his stag-do, did he?

0:22:350:22:38

I bet he didn't.

0:22:380:22:39

Liam doesn't have to dress as an alien. It's all in his mind,

0:22:410:22:44

which is exactly what he wants his bride to understand.

0:22:440:22:47

The wedding day is so important to me

0:22:470:22:49

because I want to show Lynn the true me.

0:22:490:22:53

What drives me. What's ticking over in my head.

0:22:530:22:56

What makes me think. What makes me smile. What makes me wonder.

0:22:560:23:01

Do you know what I mean, the mystery of Liam.

0:23:010:23:03

That's what she's going to experience on our wedding day.

0:23:030:23:06

Do you reckon this is giving you hope though?

0:23:110:23:14

What, an alien mask on my face giving me hope for my wedding?

0:23:140:23:18

Not really. I really don't want a themed, joke wedding.

0:23:180:23:22

I don't think he would do this for your wedding.

0:23:220:23:24

He's getting it out of the way for the hen night

0:23:240:23:27

so that it's not at the wedding. I think your wedding will be classy.

0:23:270:23:31

Classy, hmm.

0:23:310:23:33

There's nothing like feminine intuition.

0:23:330:23:37

Liam could do with some now.

0:23:370:23:39

It's the morning after the stag and, hungover,

0:23:390:23:43

he's in real alien territory, shopping for Lynn's wedding dress.

0:23:430:23:48

To make matters worse, neither of his best men have shown up.

0:23:480:23:51

Oh, God.

0:23:510:23:53

I might still have my beer goggles on.

0:23:530:23:56

That's the price you pay for being...

0:23:560:24:00

For being drunk.

0:24:000:24:02

You're probably wondering what I'm doing,

0:24:020:24:06

I'm trying to feel the fullness of the dress.

0:24:060:24:09

Knitted curtains.

0:24:100:24:12

Eugh.

0:24:130:24:15

My God...

0:24:150:24:17

I could really do with the boys here, really, do you know what I mean?

0:24:170:24:21

Take some of the pressure off me. You know, get a second opinion maybe.

0:24:210:24:25

This is it now, if I make an error with this, do you know what I mean,

0:24:250:24:27

this could ruin the whole day, potentially.

0:24:270:24:31

Hello.

0:24:340:24:36

In London, Lynn is looking for the dress that would make her happy

0:24:360:24:39

if she had any say in the wedding.

0:24:390:24:41

I don't like the lace particularly.

0:24:410:24:43

Too fussy. No. That one's too lacy.

0:24:430:24:46

This bit's too baggy.

0:24:460:24:49

-This one?

-I don't like it at all.

0:24:490:24:51

I'm looking for the sweetheart neckline, diamantes across the top.

0:24:510:24:56

In at the waist and maybe with some detail here, just here,

0:24:560:25:00

in the middle, then down and out and very swishy.

0:25:000:25:05

-No.

-I just don't like it.

0:25:050:25:10

Finding a perfect dress is proving difficult for this picky bride.

0:25:100:25:13

Good luck, Liam.

0:25:130:25:15

Liam is going to be under big pressure

0:25:150:25:17

because he knows how fussy Lynn is.

0:25:170:25:19

She isn't just a bit fussy, she's very fussy

0:25:190:25:22

and if he doesn't get it right, she won't wear it.

0:25:220:25:26

-To Lynn.

-To Lynn.

0:25:260:25:29

Best men Simon and Ciaran have finally rocked up to help.

0:25:290:25:32

Cheers.

0:25:320:25:34

The boys decide to go for quantity over quality

0:25:340:25:37

and try as many dresses as they can.

0:25:370:25:40

Pretty, but it's very plain.

0:25:400:25:43

Less is more.

0:25:430:25:44

Wow. That's beautiful.

0:25:460:25:50

Lynn's found the dress she would choose if she was in charge.

0:25:500:25:53

This is the one. This is the one.

0:25:530:25:55

The way it hangs.

0:25:550:25:57

You've got glitter, the neckline, big skirt.

0:25:570:25:59

Yeah, I want this one. That is it.

0:25:590:26:04

He's going to be hard pressed

0:26:040:26:05

to find something that gorgeous, isn't he?

0:26:050:26:08

Wouldn't it be a miracle though if he did?

0:26:080:26:10

But miracles can happen.

0:26:100:26:12

The boys are looking at a dress that's almost identical to Lynn's.

0:26:120:26:15

No.

0:26:150:26:17

Oh, dear.

0:26:170:26:18

It's nice, but it's not, like, wowing me.

0:26:180:26:23

-This is my dream dress.

-Yes.

0:26:230:26:25

This is what I imagined, exactly.

0:26:250:26:28

-I love the way it hangs down with the full skirt.

-It's so you.

0:26:280:26:32

-Romance.

-It's fairy-tale-like, isn't it?

0:26:320:26:35

That is the dress of your dreams. That is it.

0:26:350:26:38

More champagne, thank you very much.

0:26:380:26:40

Oh.

0:26:400:26:42

Six hours, two bottles of bubbly, and dozens of dresses later,

0:26:420:26:46

the boozed-up boys have finally narrowed it down to two.

0:26:460:26:50

Can you do some dance moves?

0:26:500:26:52

What do you reckon out of ten?

0:26:540:26:56

I'd say eight.

0:26:560:26:58

That's a good score.

0:26:580:26:59

If I was a girl...

0:26:590:27:00

No, no, you need to find a ten.

0:27:000:27:02

That's beautiful.

0:27:050:27:07

I thought they were all going to look the same,

0:27:070:27:09

-but that one, actually, I really like.

-That is lush.

0:27:090:27:11

Stand like a teapot.

0:27:110:27:14

It's 100% the one that I want to get for her.

0:27:140:27:17

This is the dress. I just imagine her saying, "I do."

0:27:170:27:21

Liam's fallen for a dress with a sweetheart neckline

0:27:210:27:23

and swishy skirt. It's perfect in every way, apart from one...

0:27:230:27:28

It's damaged at the bottom.

0:27:280:27:30

Discount?

0:27:300:27:32

We don't mind taking that one if it's for a discounted rate.

0:27:320:27:35

-What, with a hole in it?

-We'll fix it.

0:27:350:27:38

-Yeah, yeah.

-That is a beautiful dress.

0:27:380:27:40

You're only wearing it for one day anyway, you know what I mean?

0:27:400:27:42

Exactly, she's never going to wear it again anyway, is she?

0:27:420:27:45

Liam's not put off by a damaged shop sample

0:27:450:27:48

and an £800 discount can't hurt.

0:27:480:27:50

He gets dress, veil, shoes and tiara for just over a grand.

0:27:500:27:54

While his vision for the wedding takes shape,

0:27:590:28:01

Liam's having a tough time

0:28:010:28:03

being apart from the family he's doing it for.

0:28:030:28:05

I didn't think it would be this hard, but it's lonely.

0:28:050:28:10

I love the kids and I love Lynn.

0:28:100:28:13

Got to do it to make this dream come true.

0:28:130:28:17

Not even a dream, it's, you know, a piece of me, to be real.

0:28:170:28:23

I think what I'm doing is important for Lynn to see

0:28:240:28:28

because it shows you...

0:28:280:28:30

the deep stuff that's inside me.

0:28:320:28:36

It's going to bond us together even more.

0:28:360:28:39

It's going to complete our family, do you know what I mean?

0:28:390:28:43

We are all one and I'm here to stay.

0:28:430:28:47

I'm not just, you know, Mummy's boyfriend.

0:28:470:28:51

I'm Daddy.

0:28:510:28:54

I'm Mummy's husband. Do you know what I mean?

0:28:540:28:57

It may be a top-secret wedding,

0:29:050:29:07

but there are some things people do need to know.

0:29:070:29:11

Dress code. Women, look your gorgeous selves. Yes?

0:29:110:29:14

Yep, yep.

0:29:140:29:15

Gentlemen, white shirts, black jacket, black tie.

0:29:150:29:19

Top-secret.

0:29:190:29:21

First to be briefed...

0:29:210:29:22

Oh, "top-secret."

0:29:220:29:24

..Bridesmaid Becky.

0:29:240:29:25

What's that about then? Oh, my God, maybe it's the wedding invitation?

0:29:250:29:29

Yes, it is.

0:29:290:29:31

Gentlemen, white shirts, black jacket, black trousers,

0:29:310:29:34

black tie, not bow tie.

0:29:340:29:36

Why black jacket and black trousers?

0:29:360:29:38

What is it, a Men In Black theme?

0:29:380:29:42

Men In Black is alien-based.

0:29:420:29:43

How are you feeling?

0:29:450:29:47

I'm shocked.

0:29:470:29:48

You've got a wedding date.

0:29:480:29:49

Oh, my God.

0:29:490:29:51

Oh, my God. Hmm...

0:29:510:29:55

Are you annoyed?

0:29:550:29:57

Well, I'm not annoyed, it's just a bit disappointing.

0:29:570:30:02

I don't know what to say.

0:30:040:30:06

You're still marrying him, aren't you?

0:30:060:30:08

Yeah. Looks like it.

0:30:100:30:12

It's hard for her, this. Really difficult.

0:30:120:30:15

She's used to being in control. She's not sleeping well.

0:30:150:30:17

She's stressed to the max.

0:30:170:30:20

She's got two kids to think about.

0:30:200:30:24

I do worry.

0:30:240:30:25

Lynn's son Daniel has a top-secret mission of his own.

0:30:280:30:32

Do you miss me?

0:30:320:30:34

It's not the same.

0:30:340:30:37

He wants to find out what Liam's got planned.

0:30:370:30:40

I wouldn't mind what happens.

0:30:400:30:43

Really. Mum would.

0:30:430:30:46

Mum will mind, will she?

0:30:460:30:49

Yeah. Mum minds. It's her wedding,

0:30:490:30:51

like, she doesn't want anything to ruin it.

0:30:510:30:56

Does make sense.

0:30:560:30:58

What I'm doing has never been done.

0:30:580:31:02

That's all you need to know.

0:31:020:31:03

What is it? You can tell me.

0:31:070:31:09

I can't tell you, it's a secret.

0:31:090:31:11

It'll ruin the day for you as well.

0:31:110:31:13

-It's going to be a really nice experience for everyone.

-No.

0:31:130:31:16

That's the whole thing.

0:31:160:31:17

It's not just going to be a surprise for Mummy.

0:31:170:31:20

It should be, because it's Don't Tell The Bride.

0:31:200:31:23

It's not Don't Tell Other People.

0:31:230:31:25

Yeah, but people are sharing the experience with you.

0:31:250:31:28

So you want them to be a part of your experience, don't you?

0:31:280:31:34

It's what I do, yeah? It's because I love Mummy and I love you all.

0:31:340:31:39

OK, then.

0:31:390:31:41

-Tell me!

-No.

-If you love me, tell me.

0:31:410:31:44

These are the reasons why I'm doing what I do.

0:31:440:31:47

It's boring like this.

0:31:470:31:49

So, no matter what, you just remember that.

0:31:490:31:51

That's all you need to know.

0:31:510:31:53

With four days left to go, Liam's UFO wedding is still up in the air.

0:31:560:32:01

But he gets busy buying costumes for his actors.

0:32:010:32:04

Our theme is a top-secret alien cover-up.

0:32:050:32:08

A latex mask for the alien conducting the blessing...

0:32:080:32:11

This is what my mind looks like.

0:32:110:32:13

Don't worry, he's also organised

0:32:130:32:15

a traditional registrar to do the legal bit.

0:32:150:32:18

Yeah. Everyone says that to me. It's very strange.

0:32:180:32:22

That is nice. You can actually see through it, which is wicked.

0:32:220:32:25

How many fingers am I holding up?

0:32:250:32:27

Three.

0:32:270:32:28

But Liam is back on another planet

0:32:280:32:30

when it comes to bridesmaids' dresses.

0:32:300:32:32

It looks like them cats. You know them bald cats.

0:32:320:32:35

-Yeah.

-It looks like one of those.

0:32:350:32:37

I think you need colour.

0:32:370:32:39

IN CAMP VOICE: Accessorise.

0:32:390:32:40

GIRLS CHEER AND SCREAM

0:32:400:32:43

Still, he wisely plays it safe with a very terrestrial choice.

0:32:430:32:47

You've done really, really well.

0:32:470:32:48

You did good.

0:32:480:32:50

Greek goddesses.

0:32:500:32:53

I thought you was going to dress us all as aliens.

0:32:530:32:55

Fashion queens.

0:32:550:32:58

Absolutely over the moon. He's done so well.

0:32:580:33:00

-I'm actually in shock.

-So am I.

0:33:000:33:03

Because I didn't think he'd do it.

0:33:030:33:04

I didn't think he'd pull it out of the bag like this.

0:33:040:33:07

If he's done this right, then he must have done other stuff right.

0:33:070:33:09

You'd think so, wouldn't you?

0:33:090:33:12

It's the day before the wedding

0:33:140:33:16

and there's a lot to do to transform Liam's ex-military air base.

0:33:160:33:20

That it's! Whoa!

0:33:200:33:21

With all these worries, is it going to get finished in time?

0:33:210:33:25

Look, there's bloody loads left to do.

0:33:250:33:28

I don't know where to start.

0:33:280:33:31

Unaware of her impending close encounter,

0:33:320:33:35

Lynn's about to try on the dress

0:33:350:33:37

Liam spent six hours choosing for her.

0:33:370:33:39

It's the most important thing aside from the venue, isn't it?

0:33:390:33:42

-Hello, welcome.

-Hi, I'm Lynn.

-Lynn, the bride.

-Yes.

0:33:420:33:45

Lynn fell in love with a strapless gown

0:33:450:33:47

with a sweetheart neckline and a big swishy princess skirt.

0:33:470:33:51

What will she make of the damaged two-year-old sample

0:33:510:33:54

Liam has chosen?

0:33:540:33:55

If's if he's got the dress wrong,

0:33:550:33:57

then I'm just going to dread the day.

0:33:570:34:00

I'm going to dread it, I know it. I just won't even want to go.

0:34:000:34:04

I know. Because I just think, "Well, if he can get this so wrong,

0:34:040:34:09

"what is coming? What's next?"

0:34:090:34:11

Oh, my God.

0:34:130:34:15

If you just pop over there, hon. We will see you in a minute.

0:34:150:34:19

-Bye!

-Exciting.

0:34:190:34:21

Please, Liam. Please, Liam.

0:34:210:34:23

-Are you ready?

-OK...

0:34:230:34:25

Hmm...

0:34:430:34:45

I need to try it on.

0:34:470:34:49

She's going to cry.

0:34:490:34:51

I don't really like this big belt around the middle.

0:34:510:34:54

I hope that can come off.

0:34:540:34:56

I don't like it.

0:34:580:35:00

-Are you OK, baby?

-Yeah.

0:35:040:35:06

She doesn't sound happy.

0:35:060:35:08

She's just not going to wear it if she doesn't like it.

0:35:080:35:11

No. She won't. I wouldn't. Would you?

0:35:110:35:13

No, I wouldn't. Wait and see.

0:35:130:35:15

-Are you all ready to see her dress?

-Yes.

0:35:150:35:18

Here we come.

0:35:180:35:20

Wow!

0:35:200:35:22

I was expecting something completely different.

0:35:220:35:25

That's beautiful.

0:35:250:35:27

Oh, my God. You still look like a princess.

0:35:270:35:31

I think I would really prefer the dress without this silly strap.

0:35:310:35:34

That bodice bit is stunning and all the sparkles are brilliant.

0:35:340:35:37

-I like this bit.

-It's got the swish factor, hasn't it?

0:35:370:35:40

It definitely swishes.

0:35:400:35:42

I need to see it. I haven't seen it yet.

0:35:420:35:44

I think you'll like it a lot more when you look in the mirror.

0:35:440:35:47

The moment of truth.

0:35:470:35:49

-It's beautiful.

-Oh, yeah.

0:35:500:35:52

-Are you happy?

-It's much better than we thought, isn't it?

0:35:530:35:56

-It looks much better.

-Yeah, I am.

0:35:560:35:58

It's growing on me, actually.

0:36:000:36:02

-That's much better!

-Much better. Look at that.

0:36:030:36:06

I do like it. I'm happy.

0:36:060:36:07

Perfect, apart from one problem...

0:36:070:36:10

-Oh.

-What?

0:36:100:36:12

-Down there.

-It's got holes in it!

0:36:120:36:15

Liam had only spotted a small tear,

0:36:150:36:17

but the girls are finding loads more.

0:36:170:36:19

There's a big one up here. That's...

0:36:190:36:22

-They're everywhere.

-I'm not wearing it.

0:36:220:36:25

There's holes in this dress.

0:36:250:36:27

The seamstress is on hand for you today,

0:36:290:36:31

and what she'll do is put a bit of lace applique over the holes,

0:36:310:36:34

so it matches the dress.

0:36:340:36:35

But, unfortunately, because of the time scale we had,

0:36:350:36:37

he had to have a sample dress straight off the rack.

0:36:370:36:40

I can't wear this dress.

0:36:400:36:42

Hole, hole, hole...

0:36:420:36:43

I can't wear it.

0:36:430:36:45

Sorry, darling.

0:36:450:36:47

I don't want it.

0:36:470:36:49

They're not noticeable, Lynn.

0:36:510:36:53

I'm not wearing a dress with holes in it, Leah. I'm not wearing it.

0:36:530:36:57

Did he realise that there were holes?

0:36:570:36:59

He did know it was a sample.

0:36:590:37:01

They're boys. They didn't go over it...

0:37:010:37:02

SHE BURSTS INTO TEARS

0:37:020:37:04

No!

0:37:040:37:06

What am I going to do? I've got no dress to wear.

0:37:160:37:20

We'll do something.

0:37:200:37:21

There you go, Lynn. Take this.

0:37:230:37:25

What am I going to do?

0:37:270:37:29

It's disgusting.

0:37:290:37:31

I saw one hole, then there was more and more.

0:37:310:37:33

It's just full of holes.

0:37:330:37:34

I'm disgusted. Absolutely disgusted.

0:37:340:37:37

Someone needs to get on the phone to Liam now.

0:37:370:37:40

I don't want this dress. It's a dirty, horrible dress.

0:37:400:37:43

It's got tears in it.

0:37:430:37:45

Lynn, they're not noticeable.

0:37:470:37:49

We couldn't do any alterations until you tried it on.

0:37:490:37:51

Wait and see.

0:37:510:37:53

Once it's finished, you won't see them.

0:37:550:37:58

It's dirty. I want my own dress.

0:37:580:38:00

I don't want a dress that's been tried on by 50 million other people.

0:38:000:38:04

MOBILE PHONE RINGS

0:38:060:38:07

Bridesmaid Leah makes an emergency call to Liam.

0:38:070:38:10

Hello.

0:38:100:38:11

Hi Liam, it's Leah. I have some very bad news, I'm afraid.

0:38:110:38:14

Yeah, what's the bad news?

0:38:140:38:16

She really, really liked the dress,

0:38:160:38:18

and then we found that there's a load of holes in it.

0:38:180:38:20

She's not going to wear it.

0:38:200:38:21

She won't wear it. Let me pass you over.

0:38:210:38:24

Hi, Liam, how are you doing?

0:38:260:38:28

Well, not very good now.

0:38:280:38:30

What about the second option that we...

0:38:300:38:33

You remember the second option?

0:38:330:38:35

Yeah, I do. We can definitely go down that road.

0:38:350:38:38

-That's brand-new in.

-OK.

-We'll look after you.

0:38:380:38:41

Thank you! Bye.

0:38:410:38:43

Liam's arranged for Lynn

0:38:430:38:44

to try on another dress he originally looked at.

0:38:440:38:47

Luckily, it's the same price as the first.

0:38:470:38:50

Yeah. It's really stressed me out.

0:38:500:38:53

It annoys me that they don't realise that,

0:38:530:38:56

do you know what I mean?

0:38:560:38:58

But...there you go.

0:38:580:39:01

I could hear in his voice he was really upset.

0:39:010:39:03

I think he was sad,

0:39:030:39:05

cos I really think he hopes that he'd got it right for you.

0:39:050:39:07

He said the second choice is very similar shape.

0:39:070:39:10

-Hopefully, it's still what you're looking for.

-OK.

0:39:100:39:14

Yeah? Come on, then.

0:39:140:39:15

GIRLS YELP AND APPLAUD

0:39:180:39:19

-That's amazing!

-That's so much better.

0:39:190:39:22

With a sparkly bodice, big skirt and no holes,

0:39:220:39:25

the second dress is a hit.

0:39:250:39:28

Lynn, this is the dress.

0:39:280:39:29

-APPLAUSE

-Yay! Whoo!

0:39:310:39:34

I love it. It's perfect.

0:39:340:39:35

Things happen for a reason, and the reason is this dress.

0:39:350:39:39

Come in for a cuddle.

0:39:390:39:40

LAUGHTER

0:39:400:39:42

Dress disaster averted, time's ticking for Liam.

0:39:440:39:48

Ah! Quick, get that.

0:39:480:39:50

He's roped in an army of helpers

0:39:500:39:52

to turn his vision into a reality for Lynn's big day.

0:39:520:39:55

Not long to go, and the dirty bunker

0:39:580:40:00

still needs to be fit for the ceremony.

0:40:000:40:02

Liam's booked a hotel for Lynn,

0:40:070:40:09

but the problem with the dress has left her worried.

0:40:090:40:12

The fact that he didn't notice the tears in the dress,

0:40:120:40:15

does make me think, "Has he remembered all the small things

0:40:150:40:18

"to do with this wedding?"

0:40:180:40:19

I've thought about this for so long and for so many weeks,

0:40:190:40:23

and stressed and agonised over it,

0:40:230:40:25

that I just need to see now.

0:40:250:40:28

I need to see what he's doing.

0:40:280:40:30

I just hope that he has pulled together

0:40:300:40:32

some of the most important things, like the cake, flowers, table plan.

0:40:320:40:37

I just hope that there is some structure to the day

0:40:370:40:41

and that he has got a wedding, if you like,

0:40:410:40:45

it's not just a mess.

0:40:450:40:47

It's the night before the wedding, and at the bunker,

0:40:500:40:53

any sort of wedding ceremony is still looking light years away.

0:40:530:40:57

No matter what happens,

0:40:570:40:59

this room needs to be...done.

0:40:590:41:04

If there's one thing that's going to annoy her...

0:41:040:41:08

it's going to be this place.

0:41:100:41:13

So I need to make it look half decent...

0:41:130:41:18

to pull it off. Otherwise, I'm a dead man.

0:41:180:41:22

It's the morning of the wedding,

0:41:360:41:38

and an early start for the exhausted groom.

0:41:380:41:40

None of my blokes are here.

0:41:430:41:46

Left me on my own again.

0:41:460:41:48

There are just six hours until Lynn and Liam's alien blessing.

0:41:480:41:52

No matter what, I'm going to still try and make it

0:41:520:41:56

the best day for Lynn, even if it is me on my own.

0:41:560:42:02

At this rate, I'm going to be late to my own wedding.

0:42:020:42:05

You're very calm today, Lynn.

0:42:060:42:08

I've had my fair share of stressing out.

0:42:080:42:11

I know.

0:42:110:42:12

I can't do it any more. He loves me.

0:42:120:42:14

If you're upset, I'm upset. That's how it goes.

0:42:140:42:16

Uh-oh, next.

0:42:160:42:17

I don't think he would do anything to her that's going...

0:42:170:42:20

Yes, but we said that on the hen do

0:42:200:42:21

and we all went out with green faces.

0:42:210:42:23

No, that is the one night you are allowed to.

0:42:230:42:25

At least it's not green, luminous green face paint.

0:42:250:42:28

I hope he's not coming in any sort of green alien masks.

0:42:280:42:32

That wouldn't be funny.

0:42:320:42:33

Well, at least they're not green,

0:42:350:42:37

but in a few hours, Lynn will be married by an actor,

0:42:370:42:40

complete with alien head.

0:42:400:42:41

With three hours to go, Liam finally has some help.

0:42:440:42:48

You need to get back and get changed.

0:42:480:42:50

No, listen, man, I told you it would be fine.

0:42:500:42:51

-You've got to go back and get ready.

-I'm getting changed here.

0:42:510:42:54

It's time for Lynn to see the bridesmaids' dresses

0:42:560:42:59

that her groom has chosen.

0:42:590:43:00

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, you all look beautiful.

0:43:000:43:05

You're angels. Wow.

0:43:050:43:07

I'm stunned. How did he do that? You all look amazing.

0:43:070:43:10

Beautiful.

0:43:120:43:14

I never thought that, on my wedding day,

0:43:170:43:19

I'd be getting changed in, like, an abandoned shed.

0:43:190:43:23

No mirror to look in.

0:43:230:43:26

Freezing, windy.

0:43:280:43:31

This is all in the name of love, at the end of the day.

0:43:310:43:33

Ah!

0:43:330:43:35

Oh, my God, what's he doing? They've got green bobbles on them.

0:43:370:43:40

-That is mad.

-They're like aliens.

-That is mad.

0:43:400:43:43

-What is that?

-That is alien.

0:43:430:43:45

They are the weirdest things I've ever seen in my life!

0:43:470:43:51

That's awful.

0:43:510:43:52

I don't like that bit.

0:43:520:43:54

Wear it with happiness and pride, always.

0:44:000:44:04

LIAM: What more can you want?

0:44:040:44:06

We're on a military air base with Men In Black.

0:44:060:44:10

We've got soldiers and we've got aliens.

0:44:100:44:13

Exactly what I said from the beginning.

0:44:130:44:15

So I've always stuck with my thing. This is my dream.

0:44:150:44:19

Oh, my God. That is amazing.

0:44:240:44:26

Oh, my God! Ah!

0:44:290:44:32

THE GIRLS CHEER AND SCREAM

0:44:320:44:35

Oh, my God!

0:44:350:44:36

Excuse me, miss, if you could come this way, please.

0:44:380:44:41

THEY LAUGH

0:44:410:44:43

My veil! My veil!

0:44:430:44:44

Where are we going?

0:44:460:44:47

Why is there a man in black?

0:44:470:44:49

That is a very good question.

0:44:490:44:51

He isn't giving anything away, is he?

0:44:510:44:54

He's not giving a dickie away.

0:44:540:44:56

It's all very mysterious.

0:44:560:44:58

I thought it was going to be a nice day, though. That's the only thing.

0:45:030:45:06

-It's better than my planet.

-THEY LAUGH

0:45:060:45:08

I don't suppose you've got all that global-warming stuff going on?

0:45:080:45:12

-No.

-No.

0:45:120:45:15

THEY LAUGH

0:45:150:45:16

Everyone, just keep calm.

0:45:340:45:37

Hello, Daddy!

0:45:370:45:39

Don't be freaked out, everyone.

0:45:420:45:43

It's all right, you're with me.

0:45:430:45:46

I did hear the Men In Black.

0:45:480:45:51

It's a bit of Area 51.

0:45:510:45:53

The kids sussed it out, you know, a little bit before the adults.

0:45:530:45:56

The adults are very confused as to what is going on, still.

0:45:560:45:59

The kids may understand his vision, but will Lynn?

0:45:590:46:03

She's about to enter Liam's world.

0:46:030:46:07

Oh, my God. We're at a military base. We're at a military base.

0:46:070:46:10

Oh, my God.

0:46:100:46:12

There's a soldier, Lynn. There's a soldier.

0:46:140:46:16

- What the hell? - It's part of the theme.

0:46:160:46:20

They're winding us up. They've got to be.

0:46:200:46:22

Oh, my God!

0:46:240:46:25

SIRENS WAIL

0:46:250:46:27

Oh, my God, we're getting an escort.

0:46:270:46:30

It does get better, trust me.

0:46:360:46:39

Keep hold of them in your pocket.

0:46:390:46:42

Are you the man with the rings?

0:46:420:46:44

There's nothing here.

0:46:520:46:54

Where are all the people?

0:46:540:46:56

Are they going to be in one of these horrible buildings?

0:46:590:47:02

They're like bunkers. Where the hell is it?

0:47:040:47:06

It's a bunker, is it?

0:47:080:47:10

There's another Men In Black person.

0:47:200:47:22

Oh, my God. What is this?!

0:47:270:47:30

Area secure, open the gate.

0:47:410:47:43

-AGENT:

-Step out of the vehicle, please.

0:47:580:47:59

-It's not very romantic.

-No...

0:48:040:48:06

Good luck, darling.

0:48:060:48:08

I'm nervous. I was excited but, then,

0:48:120:48:15

I've just come here, and now I'm... Why?

0:48:150:48:19

Why?

0:48:190:48:20

GIRLS SCREAM AND LAUGH

0:48:240:48:27

I just hope she understands. We'll see.

0:48:270:48:30

After three weeks, and light years apart,

0:48:300:48:33

it's finally time for Lynn to experience

0:48:330:48:36

the full-scale of Liam's vision.

0:48:360:48:39

I'm thinking, "Oh, my God, what the hell is going on?"

0:48:390:48:42

It's really grim. It's horrible.

0:48:420:48:45

I don't really want to be here on my wedding day.

0:48:450:48:49

Horrid, horrid, horrid.

0:48:490:48:51

What was he thinking?

0:48:530:48:55

This is a joke.

0:48:590:49:01

She may not share Liam's sci-fi beliefs,

0:49:140:49:17

but she does want to share her life with him.

0:49:170:49:20

Do you like this?

0:49:300:49:31

-I'm so proud of you.

-I know it seems crazy.

0:49:310:49:34

It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

0:49:340:49:36

-But just trust me.

-I do trust you.

-Trust me.

0:49:360:49:38

Welcome, Earthlings.

0:49:400:49:43

Welcome to this intergalactic occasion.

0:49:430:49:47

It's about sharing happiness and laughter through the good times

0:49:480:49:52

and, most important, forgiving through the difficult times.

0:49:520:49:57

LAUGHTER

0:49:570:50:00

Do you take Lynn Teresa Flaunty to be your lawful wedded wife?

0:50:000:50:06

I do.

0:50:060:50:07

Now, Lynn, repeat after me.

0:50:070:50:09

I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and affection.

0:50:090:50:13

I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and affection.

0:50:130:50:17

Let the universe recognise this marriage.

0:50:170:50:20

I pronounce you husband and wife!

0:50:200:50:24

CHEERING

0:50:240:50:27

-You may now kiss the bride.

-LAUGHTER

0:50:280:50:31

You humans are so impatient.

0:50:310:50:33

Bizarre. Completely bizarre, but it was still beautiful.

0:50:390:50:42

Really emotional. I think not one of the bridesmaids

0:50:420:50:44

had a dry eye, so it was really nice.

0:50:440:50:46

It's just really surreal seeing that marriage by an alien.

0:50:500:50:53

A bit freaky, really. Strange. Very different!

0:50:530:50:57

-I'm just pleased that we're all back together now.

-Our family is back.

0:50:590:51:02

Yeah. I've really missed you.

0:51:020:51:04

The reason why I've done what I've done...

0:51:040:51:07

CRYING: I wanted to show you the real me.

0:51:090:51:12

I know, darling. I'm really proud of you.

0:51:140:51:16

The special things that go on in my mind!

0:51:160:51:18

I know. It's not what I would have chosen, as you know.

0:51:180:51:22

I know.

0:51:220:51:23

There was an alien doing our vows.

0:51:230:51:25

That's what happens in Liam's world, and you just walked into it.

0:51:270:51:31

-Do you love Daddy?

-Yeah!

0:51:310:51:33

That's an improvement.

0:51:330:51:35

I'm so happy. He pulled it off.

0:51:360:51:38

Her face just changed when she went in there and saw everybody.

0:51:380:51:41

Her face just beamed.

0:51:410:51:42

She took it a lot better than what I expected.

0:51:420:51:45

It was brilliant. Something very magical about it.

0:51:450:51:47

Very weird and magical, actually. So, part one - good.

0:51:470:51:51

Even Liam is bound by earthly laws.

0:51:540:51:56

Luckily, this out-of-this-world venue

0:51:560:51:58

has a licensed property next door

0:51:580:51:59

for the newlyweds to make the marriage legal.

0:51:590:52:02

I'm scared about the next bit.

0:52:070:52:09

It's not back in that horrible dump, is it?

0:52:090:52:12

You'll have to wait and see, won't you?

0:52:120:52:14

This is it.

0:52:200:52:21

Beautiful(!)

0:52:220:52:24

SHE GASPS

0:52:240:52:26

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

0:52:280:52:31

-What do you think?

-Ah!

0:52:330:52:34

Urgh! That's horrible!

0:52:360:52:38

Excuse me.

0:52:380:52:40

-What's the matter?

-That's horrible, Liam.

0:52:400:52:43

-Sorry.

-That's disgusting.

0:52:430:52:46

Do you like my plants, though?

0:52:460:52:49

Hmm...

0:52:490:52:51

-What?

-Not really.

0:52:510:52:53

Not something you would like? It's tropical.

0:52:530:52:56

What have you done? Eugh!

0:52:560:52:58

An autopsy. Do you not like it?

0:52:580:53:02

It's different.

0:53:020:53:05

No. Oh, my God.

0:53:050:53:07

There's an alien in there.

0:53:070:53:09

He's a live one. They've been working together, you see.

0:53:090:53:12

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

0:53:140:53:18

You ain't seen nothing yet, darling.

0:53:180:53:21

MUSIC: "Alien" by Nerina Pallot

0:53:230:53:26

Oh, that's gruesome.

0:53:330:53:36

That's pretty good, that.

0:53:360:53:37

This is Liam to a T, and he's pulled it off amazingly,

0:53:480:53:50

and I'm proud of him. It's nothing anyone would ever want as a wedding,

0:53:500:53:54

but it's amazing. Every bit has been amazing.

0:53:540:53:57

CHEERING

0:53:570:54:01

-OVER PA:

-'Please put your hands together for our brand-new...'

0:54:130:54:16

INCOMPREHENSIBLE

0:54:160:54:19

You have been fortunate enough to experience my mind.

0:54:210:54:25

LAUGHTER

0:54:250:54:28

This is why I can't sleep at night.

0:54:280:54:30

But welcome to my world.

0:54:320:54:33

LAUGHTER

0:54:330:54:35

I'd like to say, I missed Lynn so much, and the kids.

0:54:350:54:39

You just forget how much you love people, you know what I mean?

0:54:410:54:44

Peace out.

0:54:440:54:46

CHEERING

0:54:460:54:48

I'm not disappointed I haven't got a princess wedding.

0:54:540:54:57

This is better. This is Liam's dream and Liam is my dream.

0:54:570:55:00

That's all that matters.

0:55:000:55:02

Do you want some alien mash potato?

0:55:020:55:04

No.

0:55:040:55:05

It doesn't really change things.

0:55:050:55:08

It's just more love and brings people closer together.

0:55:080:55:13

Stuff like that.

0:55:130:55:15

Liam's pulled off his extraterrestrial wedding,

0:55:180:55:21

but has it given Lynn the insight into his head that he'd wanted?

0:55:210:55:25

I don't need to understand what's going up there,

0:55:250:55:27

as long as I know what's going on in there. You love me. I love you.

0:55:270:55:31

The rest just... You're just nuts.

0:55:310:55:34

MUSIC: "Men In Black" by Will Smith

0:55:340:55:39

Ah!

0:55:410:55:43

What?

0:55:430:55:44

A UFO there.

0:55:440:55:46

I think they're coming to take us home.

0:55:460:55:48

Bye-bye!

0:55:510:55:52

Next week, it's time for DJ Lewis...

0:55:540:55:57

12k...

0:55:570:55:58

..to plan the gig of his life for bride-to-be Sinsee.

0:55:580:56:01

Way too much bling.

0:56:010:56:03

But while she dreams of a posh country affair...

0:56:030:56:05

So beautiful.

0:56:050:56:06

..Lewis is tied to his city-boy roots.

0:56:060:56:09

This place is perfect.

0:56:090:56:11

Can our chilled-out groom...

0:56:110:56:13

I'm top dog.

0:56:130:56:14

..keep his cool....

0:56:140:56:16

Right, think, think, think.

0:56:160:56:17

..or will there be murder on the dance floor?

0:56:170:56:19

Why are we here?!

0:56:190:56:20

What the hell on earth is this?

0:56:200:56:23

MUSIC: "Alien" by Erasure

0:56:250:56:28

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:56:370:56:40

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