Ellis & Luke Don't Tell the Bride

-From the depths of the Earth to the crests of the mountains...

-My legs have gone weird.

..these crusading grooms must rise to the challenge.

-£12,000...

-LAUGHTER

..and just three weeks...

I love that girl. I love her.

..to plan a wedding worthy of their betrothed.

Oh, my God! What's he done?

He just took my dress!

These fair maidens are bound by contract to be legally wedded...

-God, no!

-..but have no say in their big day.

Is it just going to all be last-minute and just rubbish?

I hate it, I need to get out of it.

Can these hapless heroes marshal their armies...

I love her, but she's a bitch when she's like this.

..vanquish dragons...

ALL GROAN

Do as your future mother-in-law tells you.

..and conquer all before them?

SCREAMING

Get out of my pub!

Or will they be...defeated?

I'm not doing it.

Tonight...

Yeah!

Wannabe DJ Luke plans the ultimate party

for homebody bride-to-be Ellis.

If it glows, we want it.

While she is dreaming of a traditional church wedding.

Cute, innit?

Will Luke and party animal best man Tom...

That just screams, "Get married on me," mate.

..have her reaching for the glowsticks?

-God Is A DJ.

-Yeah, God Is A DJ.

Or will they send Ellis and her family raving mad?

-You've organised it, of course it's your fault!

-I'm sorry.

It's always good to bring someone down a little bit before you bring them back up again, innit?

Can Luke cast aside his party ways and leave Ellis on a high?

Everything is in his hands.

Ellis, this is the start of our new life. Boom!

Or will she be facing the ultimate comedown?

There might be a point to it.

That seems ridiculous.

At the end of the day, you're going to marry the man you love, aren't you?

Do they sell vodka here?

Plasterer Luke and dental nurse Ellis first met at a house party

in Sheffield five years ago, and it was lust at first sight.

The first time I seen Ellis it was quite breathtaking.

She's a beautiful-looking girl,

and I couldn't believe my luck, to be honest.

First time I saw him, I thought,

"Yep, he's definitely the fittest here.

"That's the one!"

I were dancing with my pals and then you just swooped in.

Not a word said between us,

just hopped on me, started snogging me, didn't you?

Yeah.

After a romantic first date down the local,

born and bred Worksop lass Ellis knew she had found her soulmate.

He's just such a nice person, like, a genuine salt of t'Earth guy.

And he's a pussycat, really.

He looks like a bear, but he's a pussycat.

And he makes me laugh all the time. We just have a right laugh.

Pussycat Luke may have Ellis purring,

but something that hasn't always been a right laugh is Luke's complete uselessness,

particularly when it comes to matters of the heart.

-He's got a track record of messing up romantic moments.

-Like when?

You have, Luke. New Year's Eve, my birthday.

Even when he proposed, you got that a bit wrong, didn't you?

Just in living room.

Bottle of prosecco and two glasses in one hand, and a ring in the other.

I'm a hopeless romantic, aren't I? SHE LAUGHS

Yep, literally hopeless.

From dodgy dates to passing out drunk in the heat of the moment,

Luke's misfired many a time.

But he thinks he knows why Ellis puts up with him.

I think our relationship works because we're so different.

I'm so laid-back and you're so on the go.

I'm like a tightly wound spring.

Ellis can't sit and rest, I can just lay and rest all day.

Luke's personality and outlook on life will hinder him greatly

in his organisation of the wedding.

He's like a typical caveman, scratching his arse

and farting on the sofa.

He's ridiculous. You are just lazy, really, aren't you?

Quite a chilled-out guy. I've got a motto.

My little motto is, it's all going to be all right in the end,

no matter how tough things get.

Worried time is wasted time.

Laid-back Luke, or Burger as he's known to everyone but his mum,

may be proud of his mantra, but Ellis knows what it actually means.

"I'll do it tomorrow." He doesn't do anything in this house. Nothing.

I do bills, all the cleaning, ironing, everything.

-Give me a minute.

-Please, Luke.

Which makes me feel a bit sick, to be honest, about this wedding.

And if that makes her feel sick,

Luke's greatest obsession in life has her positively ready to chunder.

My big passion in life other than Ellis is music.

I'm kind of obsessed with music. Eat, sleep, breathe music.

Ellis doesn't take too kindly to this.

It's crap. It's crap, it is.

TECHNO MUSIC

It bores me. It's just bang, bang, bang, bang. Same stuff, different...

I can't tell the difference between songs.

So we clash on that, and I do feel like he's got that

side of his life and then he's got me. It's like a nightclub, it is.

I don't know how the neighbours cope, because I can't.

At one point in our lives,

me and Luke were on a par in the party life.

-You simmered down.

-You are a sucker for a party, aren't you?

I like to go out and have a dance, but I know when to say no.

Luckily for Luke, there is someone in his life who'll always say yes -

best man and fellow party animal Tom.

Or, as he's also known, Afro.

No idea why.

Me and Tom met about five years ago.

We've been pretty much inseparable since.

There's three people to our relationship,

and that is his best man, Tom.

I think Ellis loves the dynamic

of what me and Burger have got going on.

I would say we have got

a bit of a bromance going on, but I think...

I think that's what everyone wants, is it not?

Luke is in love with Tom and Tom is in love with Luke.

It's a relationship. He is here all the time. All the time.

And I love the guy, but he doesn't know when to go home.

And just like in any loving relationship,

Luke and Tom spend plenty of time together alone in the bedroom.

So they'll both be upstairs in the bedroom for hours,

while I'm sat down here twiddling my thumbs.

And then I'll go upstairs and peak my head in...

Both of them in the room like this. Loving it.

HOUSE MUSIC

I think we both buzz off music probably a little bit too much

than normal people would do, which makes us look a bit weird.

It swings back in, mate.

-He's off his head.

-LUKE LAUGHS

But last year, just after Ellis and Luke moved in together,

they faced a serious test of their relationship,

and it looked like it might all be over.

We've had a rocky year. A lot has happened.

Arguments, a lot of uncertainty.

I left for about a month.

We were heartbroke, and Luke didn't know what to do for the best.

I've been an idiot sometimes. Other times I've not thought

and I've done things without thinking about my consequences.

I want to show her that she's my main priority.

I want her to be proud of me for once for doing something good for her.

Luke now needs to organise a day that she'll never forget.

But his and Tom's bromance and party animal ways has Ellis worried

she'll remember it for all the wrong reasons.

The reason I want quite a low-key wedding is

because my life is one big party all the time.

Hectic.

There's always people here, we don't get much time on our own.

And I've sort of grown up beyond that now.

It's a wedding we're planning and not a party.

Cos obviously they both have a mutual love of being party animals.

I don't want them to think my wedding's an event. It's a wedding.

But fortunately for Ellis,

DJ Luke has a passionate plan for their big day.

My idea for the wedding, have a big rave...

TECHNO MUSIC

..with glowsticks, lasers, smoke machines, lighting, good sounds.

I want to bring my two main loves, I want my music and my woman.

Me and Ellis have always been clubbing people,

we like partying, we met at a party.

We both like to dance.

I think the moment when Ellis realises it is going to be this massive rave, she...

I'm hoping she's going to be taken away by...happiness.

All being well. If she is who I think she is.

On the off chance she's not, of course,

there could be MURDER ON THE DANCEFLOOR.

Because this day means everything to Ellis.

If it is just a joke and it's made about them two,

and Luke and his friends, and not about me,

I'll be really disheartened,

and I'll just feel like I sort of know my place in the pecking order.

He's not very thoughtful.

And I'm trusting him to do the most romantic day of my life, basically.

SHE IMITATES GUNSHOT

It's time for the couple to say goodbye, leaving Luke

in charge of the house they've shared together for the past year.

It's going to be really hard without him.

Aren't you going to be glad to get me out of your hair for a few days?

Two weeks, and a month to go.

The longest time Luke and Ellis

have gone without contact is just a few hours.

But for the next three weeks, they'll have no contact whatsoever.

It doesn't feel real, does it?

Next time I see you, you'll be walking down the aisle to me.

-I love you.

-I love you.

See you later.

-Love you.

-Love you.

God, it's horrible, isn't it?

I can't believe it's actually happening.

While the reality of leaving her man sinks in for Ellis,

Luke isn't lonely for long.

As one love of his life leaves, another arrives. Tom.

Yes, brah!

-We're free men, mate.

-You're a free man, mate. Free man. How are you feeling?

Good, mate. Can't wait to get stuck in.

Cheers!

We've got 12 grand, mate. We've got no women around.

Let's kick back and relax.

What's first... First thing, then?

-Shall we get the decks down?

-Decks downstairs.

Check out the ninja.

With the boss away, Luke can finally bring his babies downstairs.

"What are you bringing decks downstairs for?"

# Let's get this party started. #

TECHNO MUSIC

While the boys enjoy their party for two,

Ellis is across town, where she'll be spending the next three weeks with her mum, Dee.

My baby's home!

Her very protective mum, Dee.

Luke is so laid-back that I do worry slightly that he might not be able to pull it off.

He thinks it's going to be easy, doesn't he?

What am I going to do if I hate my dress?

But you know that we'll tell you if we don't like it, don't you?

Don't be brutal. Do you know what I mean?

What's Luke doing tonight?

-Afro's moving in, and then... that's it.

-Oh, no.

-I know.

-Your house will be wrecked.

I know. I've been thinking that. "Oh, God, my house."

No, he might be sensible. He might surprise us.

He might.

But then again, he might not.

Mind them frames!

ALL CHEER

Day one, and the sun's up, but the boys most certainly are not.

As the lads ease themselves gently into the wedding planning,

at Ellis' mum's house, her aunts Tracey and Sarah

and bridesmaid Jade are round to discuss Luke's prospects,

and this lot won't be easy to please.

There's three sisters.

We have been referred to as the three witches, more than once.

Because Ellis is the first one to get married, it's not just Ellis

he's got to impress, he's got to impress the three witches.

-We're not organising it, are we?

-No.

You know, we're not in control at all.

If we were organising it, it would be exactly what Ellis wants.

Well, hopefully he might do something that is everything I want that I just never thought...

Thought you did want, yeah.

Luke's definitely got something to prove to me.

Yeah. Cos he has let you down a lot.

This is a chance for him to show you how much he really does love you,

and give you a wedding that you deserve and a wedding that you want.

I think he'll come good.

It's two days since Ellis left, and the boys are finally

venturing out in search of a venue for their rave wedding.

The girls are busy too. In the nearby village of Thorpe Salvin,

Ellis, along with her mum and bridesmaids, have come to check out

her dream wedding venue - the parish church.

Pretty, innit?

-Yeah, it's beautiful.

-Personal.

-Intimate, in't it?

Do you think he'll even think of doing something like this, though? Little quaint church?

No, I doubt it.

It's making me sad thinking you probably won't have it here. LAUGHTER

Is he into churches and stuff like that?

Luke's church is a DJ box.

-God Is A DJ.

-Yeah, God Is A DJ.

MUSIC: God Is A DJ by Faithless

Oh, it's even better inside.

It is, in't it? A little space, all your family and friends.

Cute, in't it? Cute.

I'm usually all for party and laugh, aren't I?

But this bit is serious, in't it? This is the serious bit.

Does he actually know what you want?

-I'm worried now.

-That's worried me now.

-Cos I think he's going to want to go big rather than small.

-Why?

I don't know, I think cos he's got the freedom to do what he wants,

I bet he'll think the bigger the better, the more that you'll like it.

Try this on for size then, Ellis. The Academy in Sheffield.

Live music and club night venue. Capacity - 1,800 people.

1,800 sweaty, dancing, drunk people. Every girl's dream(!)

It's more than big enough for what we want. Maybe too big.

-We'll know when we get inside.

-You feeling it or what, dude?

Yeah, mate, I'm excited. I don't know what Ellis would think.

It's not about the outer exterior, it's about the beauty inside, mate.

It is, innit? THEY LAUGH

And for the boys, the inside doesn't disappoint.

POUNDING DANCE MUSIC

Time to get excited now.

I'm just thinking about white draping the place to hell, mate.

-Get the place clad in glowsticks as well, mate.

-That bit's the secondary chill bit.

That just screams, "Get married on me," mate.

Luke and Tom's imagination, and possibly common sense,

are running wild.

But their minds are about to be blown.

-Mate, just as we got attached to that room.

-I know, check it!

Let's be honest, we have just walked through that door, yeah,

walked in and seen these lights just flying around,

and a few colours and a bit of smoke, mate.

Imagine how she's going to feel, right, the lights are going,

the music's going, mate, and she's just been married to you, dude.

I think she's going to be absolutely over the moon with it.

She might be over the moon with it, were it not for the fact

it's the one thing she is most terrified he'll do

with her wedding day.

Would you be upset if Luke did a spot himself,

-DJing on your wedding night?

-Yeah.

On my wedding day, shouting at Luke, nagging at Luke, like I do

when I'm at home, and he's on the decks constantly, 24/7.

Just an excuse for Luke to DJ.

THEY LAUGH

Oh, come on, Luke wouldn't do that.

Oh, no, wait.

-Am I all right to fire one of these up?

-Course you can, mate.

He would.

UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS

Sounds good, that, doesn't it, mate?

-Confetti just firing, mate, just at the front.

-Stage dive.

-Getting everyone bouncing.

-Yeah.

You just go, "Ellis, this is the start of our new life!"

The boys have been won over by this massive venue.

Or more accurately, its massive sound system.

Now they just need to cut a deal with the management.

Just play it cool.

-We love the place, by the way, mate. Love it.

-Thank you.

-Yeah, yeah.

So how much are we talking?

-It would be about £1,500.

-Sound!

-Oh, dear.

-Mate, we want it.

-Yeah.

-OK, smashing.

-Oh, my lord!

You want to hug the guy, mate, you want to hug the guy!

I've never met anyone quite as excited about hiring out this venue.

I'm not 100% sure I've ever met two people as excited

about anything as that before.

When we first walked in though, mate, and we saw that main room,

I kind of like, a little bit of wee came out, right, yeah?

We were expecting three to four grand, weren't we?

What do you think Ellis will think when she turns up

and sees the O2 Academy?

When she first initially turns up and gets out of the car...

..and looks up at it, she's going to have a bit of...

"What the hell is this?" But, mate, guess what?

It's always good to bring someone down a little bit before you

bring them back up again, innit? You know what I mean?

Everything is going according to plan.

Only a few days in, it really is everything we wanted,

I'm really happy.

So, the lads have secured their dream venue.

They've booked the huge downstairs room for both the ceremony

and reception, for £1,500.

And with the registry office booked for the legal ceremony

the following day, DJ Luke is sorted.

It's the middle of week one.

And Ellis is increasingly worried she might not get her perfect

church ceremony.

So she has mustered her army of 15 - that's 15 bridesmaids -

at the pub for moral support.

When there's 15 girls in this hideous dress,

and just be like, "What have we come to?"

The thing is, I don't think he'd care what you wear either.

You might not have a white dress.

I think you're having Air Max and a tracksuit.

-Air Max and a tracksuit?

-Yeah!

If I get there and see that him and Afro have took it for a joke,

decks on, no thought gone into it, "We're doing what we want,

"what we think will be a good night for me and t'lads,"

-that's when I'll be upset.

-It is a possibility.

Just so consumed with worry. I didn't think...

I never thought it would worry me this much.

And affect my life how it has been, I can't think about anything else.

Ellis' bridesmaids have got her worried about just what her groom

has planned for their big day.

But Luke is confident he can do whatever he wants,

as long as he gets one key thing right.

If the dress does go wrong and we pick the entirely wrong dress,

that could ruin the whole day.

It could potentially ruin the wedding.

He just needs to find a wedding dress Ellis will feel good in

at a sweaty rave. Simple.

Can Luke and his fashionista mates avoid it all going a bit Pete Tong?

I think we want something to show off her figure.

She likes tits and boobs out every time we go out.

She's either got her ass out or she's got her legs out,

she's got something hanging out.

Is that the sort of pattern you're looking for, or...?

I don't give a rat's ass about patterns.

-You want none of this business on it, do you?

-I don't know.

We need some advice, don't we?

Probably best.

In Lincolnshire, and still hoping for a traditional wedding,

Ellis has brought her mum, aunties Tracey and Sarah

and bridesmaid Jade to see exactly what she would like

to wear on her dream wedding day.

I'm that excited I can't wait, but I'm a bit nervous because

I don't want to find my one today, because if I do I'll be gutted.

Cos I know that's not the one I'm going to be getting.

Nice to meet you.

I do like lace, I like vintage-y, I quite like full-length sleeves.

Quite covered up. Usually when I go out, I've got everything out.

I'm quite body confident.

-Just get really elegant for the day.

-Elegant and classic, really nice.

-Well, go and try some on then, yeah?

-Yeah.

Back in Sheffield, Luke has a simple plan.

She likes to have a bit of leg on show or boobs hanging out.

He's convinced the way Ellis glams up for a night out on the town

is how she'd like to look on her wedding day.

This is really...

Right, just for a second, Burger, just for a second,

try your best to see your lass in that.

Something along them lines but without all this.

Without all this.

OK. If you're wanting it customising,

that can be done, and then it just scoops straight down into...

-There you've gone as well.

-That's just for hangers, mate.

THEY HUM "BRIDAL CHORUS"

-It's not the one, is it?

-No.

Oh, God, I didn't think I would be that bothered.

I thought, as long as it fits, it'll be all right.

Back with the boys, and true to Luke's vision for his bride-to-be,

they're looking at a dress to show as much of Ellis off as possible.

-It's nice, innit?

-It's nice, mate. Yeah, I like that, mate.

I could definitely see Ellis wearing something like that,

I think she'd like that.

I think she'd like it cos legs would be out, chebs would be out.

Ellis has found a rather more elegant option.

A vintage full-length lace dress with covered shoulders

and chebs most definitely in.

THEY GUSH

-That is fabulous!

-That's beautiful.

-Oh, Ellis.

-Look at the train!

-Oh, look!

-Oh, Ellis, that's the one.

The addition of a lace bolero jacket completes the sophisticated

long-sleeved look Ellis has been dreaming of.

-Oh, I love that, Ellis.

-Fabulous.

And I still don't think you need a veil. Less is more again, int it?

You look like Downton Abbey.

Ellis has found her ideal dress.

But DJ Luke is spinning a completely different tune.

He has got his eye on a fishtail number with exposed arms.

It looks perfect for a church wedding

but what about a sweaty rave?

I like it. I just don't know if I'm sold on the top bits.

I like the dress.

The decision of whether to keep the lace detail

at the top of the dress is one Luke daren't get wrong.

Yeah, it's an awesome dress, innit, mate?

If only his true love were here to try it on.

Has your perceptions of me changed, has it?

THEY LAUGH

Is this the dress, Burger?

Yeah, we're all agreed, that's the dress.

Right, I want to get out of this now.

-You look fabulous, mate!

-I regretted it as soon as I put it on.

THEY LAUGH

Luke bags the dress for £700.

But, for Ellis, the situation is no laughing matter.

It's made it all seem real, now.

The reality that you're actually getting married?

-No, don't.

-SHE SOBS

-I do feel a bit sad.

-Why are you sad?

Because she wants this dress and she can't have it.

At the end of the day, you're going to marry the man you love, aren't you?

Now it's serious and it is... Everything is in his hands.

Everything.

Luke might not have picked Ellis' dream dress

but at least he hasn't done anything too crazy.

When we get married, we want to incorporate some colour into Ellis.

-You can order coloured veils.

-Stick a colourful veil on her.

It's the start of week two. With the venue and a dress sorted

and around £3,000 gone, the financial floodgates are open

and Luke is ready to get spending.

First stop, a rave store to stock up on essentials for the party.

If it glows, we want it!

POUNDING DANCE MUSIC

Two musketeers, mate.

-She's going to love you.

-I feel like, "Sector 12, going in..."

Ellis might not be getting white doves

but it looks like her guests might be getting white gloves.

-See what I'm saying, brah?!

-I love it, mate.

Next, it's off to check out some vital hardware.

We've both been suckers for lasers before in us lives, haven't we?

We both love it, mate. Mate, it's got some great stuff in there, man.

-I'm thinking we might need two.

-Yes!

And Luke has a plan to make sure Ellis' wedding night

goes with a bang.

Can we see a confetti cannon in action? A safe job is a happy job.

BOTH: Yes!

Lucky Ellis(!)

And Tom's left to hire that one absolute wedding essential...

Let's get in, mate.

..a bouncy castle.

I think people will love it, I think it'll go down really well.

With all the important stuff out of the way,

next up is the small matter of the wedding rings.

And Luke isn't done splashing the cash.

That one's 995.

My budget were probably about 800 quid for both rings. £1,990.

So, Luke blows over twice what he had in his budget -

almost £2,000 on the rings.

I don't think he's thinking about the fact he's just spent £2,000.

I think he'll think about this in a couple of days

once we realise that we've just lost £2,000.

Tom's worried about Luke's spending rate, and with good reason.

Just a few days into week two, he's gone through almost £7,000.

Meanwhile, Ellis and mum Dee have a whole other concern -

the bridal footwear - and it's got them in quite a flap.

My foot would look the size of a penguin's in that.

Because it's low?

For me, I've got massive feet, I would look like...

-Like you've got flippers on.

-Like I'd got flippers on, yeah.

-So you're hoping for a platform, sparkly...platform...

-Pink heel.

Pink?

I think you can forget a pink shoe, duck.

-Think again, Dee.

-Oh, wow!

-BOTH LAUGH

The good news is a pink shoe is exactly what Ellis is getting.

The bad news is, well, everything else.

But Luke has a cunning plan to make them perfect for Ellis.

OK, this is going to be a first, then.

First pair of trainers and they're pink.

He's found a designer who specialises in customising

wedding shoes.

Or trainers.

In terms of your theme...

We're going for a rave wedding.

Really?!

-OK!

-How would you feel if you got these on your wedding day?

I probably wouldn't be best pleased!

So, we will go through some ideas for them that fits your theme.

While Luke is happily blowing the budget to turn a bright pink trainer

into a wedding shoe, back in Worksop,

it turns out it's not just Tom who's worried about his spending.

It's also starting to prey on Ellis' mind.

I'm worried about where the budget's gone, do you know what I mean?

He's useless with money.

-Do you think they've gone in and gone, "Yeah, we'll have it, sound"?

-Yeah.

"That's a right good idea for a venue!"

-They'll get it whatever the price is.

-Whatever cost.

If that's what they've done, whatever's last on the list,

-they're going to have no money left for.

-Yeah.

Forget about what's on the bottom of the list and go,

"Oh, we've had to compromise that for...

"For that stupid idea that we thought were right good fun."

And they'll probably try and convince themselves that I'd think

-it were a good idea.

-They will, that's what they'll do.

Do they sell vodka here?

She might need it when she hears about Luke's next

budget-busting idea.

He's back in Sheffield with a genius scheme for the ceremony

that he hopes Ellis will love.

It's his big chance to make up for the tough times he's caused.

Let's just hope it softens the blow of that rave.

We're meeting a marquee guy to get a marquee put up in there,

to actually get married in.

We're basically going to have a venue within another venue.

She's going to get her little ceremonial thing that she wants.

Cos she's going to get here,

instantly write it off as a bad... "Oh, as if we're getting married

"in the O2 Academy,"

and she's going to walk into this wonderful marquee.

She's going to think that's awesome.

She might do... Whether she thinks it makes any sense

is a whole other matter.

-I'm Luke, how are you doing?

-Tom, mate. Nice to meet you, you all good?

Luke's plan is to erect a marquee on the dance floor,

creating a temporary venue for the ceremony.

He'll then whisk Ellis off while the marquee is taken down,

so she can return to a surprise rave reception.

Simple, really.

It is possible to put a marquee in here.

We need to determine how many guests you've got coming.

160 guests for the daytime, weren't we?

It's probably doable, but it'll be tight.

-You need to use about 80% of this space.

-So how much are we talking?

As a ballpark fee,

you're probably looking in the region of £2,000.

You're the marquee expert. In my head, that seems ridiculous.

I spent two grand on two rings that are going to last me the rest of my life.

Ellis is going to be able to walk into a venue without seeing the actual venue, mate,

and then, boom, it's like the whole venue morphs into the rave, mate. Please tell me you feel it...

I am feeling it, mate, but two grand, mate, know what I mean?

-Yeah, but...

-We've got a grand for flowers, a grand for decorations we need.

We've got no suits. We've got no bridesmaids' dresses.

Suddenly, it's dawning on Luke that this plan could have

knock-on effects further down the line. Is this £2,000 that could be

better spent elsewhere?

What are you thinking? What's running through your mind?

We need to figure out whether we can afford to pay two grand for it.

-Is there any movement?

-That's a lower price we are giving you.

There's not really much movement in that, to be completely honest,

given the scale of what we have got to do.

'I wasn't expecting it to be this much. But this is all about Ellis.'

I want to prove to her... I've put her through some harsh times

and I want to prove to her that I can put her

through the best times of her life. The reason I want to do the wedding

the way I am was because Ellis loves it when I surprise her.

She loves a good old surprise.

We are only going to get one shot at this. Got the money. Why not?

-Let's do it.

-Let us hope that this £2,000 surprise helps make up for

the fact Ellis is getting married in a nightclub.

But will it leave Luke short for the essentials,

like the 15 bridesmaids' dresses he still needs?

Luke is halfway through the three weeks and has spent almost £9,000.

In the midst of trying to organise the hen and stag dos,

the reality of a budget with a marquee-sized hole in it has set in.

How much would it be in total for 20 girls?

Thanks a lot.

I've looked into getting 20 birds at a spa day, with one treatment each.

You're talking 800 quid, you know what I mean?

We haven't really got much room, really, have we, to even question

what we want to do with them, have we? We don't have much option.

We're not having a stag do, mate, you know what I mean?

And with that drop, we can afford to give them a hen do.

So you are telling me, mate, that you are not going to have a stag do?

I don't mind taking the fall on this one.

Right.

The marquee has been the one that has sent us over the edge, budget-wise.

Because of that, I'm not even having a stag do.

I am sacrificing the stag do altogether.

Getting the marquee might have ended up being a bad idea.

I would've thought he would definitely have wanted a stag do.

He would've definitely wanted to have one, right?

Cos he is a boy. He loves his partying.

I know that for a start.

But the pressure of the wedding and the realisation that he has got to

get it sorted, has really pushed it to the back of his mind

and made him not really fussed.

But as a mate, I think he should definitely have a stag do.

I think he needs it.

With the stag do looking like a stag don't,

a few days later, loaded up with cheap booze for the girls,

Tom heads over to Dee's, to reveal the details of their

-budget hen do.

-CHEERING

You have all got 20 bottles of wine to drink.

CHEERING

I want you all smashed before you leave here. And this is mandatory.

You have got to UV your faces up, right. There is going to be...

At five o'clock, there is going to be six taxis turning up here.

And when you get there, open this envelope

and you will find out what is happening.

SCREAMING

-Love you, too.

-Let's get smashed!

-CHEERING

-Let's go.

"Luke's good."

Argh!

Taxi man, where are we going?

I am obliged not to say.

Oh, no! My brother used to work at the Laser Quest round the corner

-from this. We're going there.

-It's there!

That brow is going to get shaved.

SHRIEKING

I'll kill you, Luke!

-It will be brilliant.

-It will be very funny.

The girls have had their surprise,

but Tom also has one in store for Luke.

CHEERING

After all, what are friends for?

Is this the stag do, then?! LAUGHTER

Burger's here and I want him to have a good night.

Hopefully, we will get him in all these clothes.

And it is not long before everyone is drunk and in lipstick.

I think this smashes Ellis' hen do. Obviously, we want to make sure

they have a good time, but, as far as I am concerned,

lads have a better time than lasses, anyway, so...

CHEERING

Split yourselves into two teams.

The winning team will get a prize. Good luck and enjoy.

CHEERING

SHE LAUGHS

We won!

This is not what I would usually pick, but it has been so much fun.

Listen! "Ellis and the winning team of Laser Quest will be getting

"picked up and taken to Sheffield in a party bus."

CHEERING

"As for the losing teams and anyone else wanting to join you

"on your night out, you will have to make your own way there."

What a bastard.

You lot are going on the boogie bus, all-singing, all-dancing,

and we're in t'cheap seats.

We were all having a really good time and then that's just come up.

It has thrown a spanner in the works. People are a bit negative.

"How are we getting there? How are we getting back?"

'I feel a bit territorial. I feel like I want to protect Luke.'

That is why I'm upset. I feel...

I want everyone to have a good time, which I feel we have had.

But you can't please everyone.

It is not about everyone, is it?

It is about me and him and that's it.

Don't you dare cry, you muppet.

It is not that I didn't want a stag do, but I wanted to make the day

as special as I could for Ellis.

Cos I am sorry for everything that I've put her through.

In all honesty, my mates tell me, and I know,

Ellis is way out of my league.

She is beautiful.

I sometimes ask myself, "What the hell is she doing with me?"

She is gorgeous and I can't wait to marry her.

In the midst of the fallout from their cut-price hen do, and with

just one week left until the wedding, the boys are facing up

to the consequences of their over-enthusiastic spending.

Their biggest headache? Ellis' army of 15 bridesmaids.

Armed with just £300, the boys head into the unknown waters

-of bridesmaid dress shopping.

-We are in a position where we have not

got the money and we have not got the time, so we really just need to

pull what we can out of the bag.

We need to actually sort it.

We need to leave here with at least some dresses!

I am not looking forward to shopping for dresses at all, mate.

How would a woman think about this situation?

Well, for starters,

a woman probably wouldn't pick the first thing she sees.

-I think that's all right!

-I do, as well!

-Sadly, there isn't a woman here.

-I like it.

Yeah. I feel like we have got an easy card here.

I feel like we should play it.

THEY LAUGH

Incredibly, the boys have picked up all 15 dresses at a bargain price

of just £11 each.

That's less than £175 in total.

It seems their luck is well and truly in the pink.

The bridesmaids are on their way round now...

So I am going to...

..take off the price tag, because I know, if they see that,

they will hate the dresses.

Jade is leading an advance party of five of Ellis' bridesmaids

to collect the dresses, and they do not have particularly high hopes.

-You can't please 15 girls ever.

-There's 15 girls...

He'll have just said, "This is what they're getting, like it or lump it."

It's just the not knowing, ain't it?

Being in the dark for this long and the wedding's soon

and we've not heard anything.

-The dragons are here!

-Hello!

Smells like a dirty man pit.

Look at it. When are we getting these dresses?

It's the moment of truth. Has Luke pulled it out of the bag?

-GIRLS:

-Oh!

-They're quite nice!

-Good answer!

Have I actually got an all right dress?

-GIRLS:

-Yes!

-Well done, babe. That's not bad!

I can't believe it, to be honest.

Just wait until they see how much they were!

When you find out, girls, it will already be too late!

Actually all right, aren't they?!

Ah, ignorance is bliss. The girls are leaving happy, but not as happy

as Luke is for getting away with his bargain-basement dresses.

Time to report in to his best man.

I ripped all the tags off, mate,

so they do not know how much they cost and they all love them. Ha-ha!

'They all love them? Yes, mate!'

It is the day before the wedding and Ellis is finally going to see

her dress.

She has brought along bridesmaid Jade, her mum and her aunties.

Tensions are running high.

This morning, I feel really sick.

-I woke up at 6:30.

-Yeah.

-What if it is wrong?

-Oh, God, please.

-Hello. Let's have a look at what he chose for you.

-Oh, God.

I need to sit down! I need to sit down.

Grab a seat, girls.

That's it.

-Right.

-So scared.

Let's have a look.

Oh, God. I feel sick.

Ellis dreamt of a sophisticated lace gown with long sleeves

to match her dream traditional church wedding,

but Luke has picked a sleeveless fishtail number.

Yeah, I like it.

Oh, I'm crying now... Bless him.

It's just a right big thing for him to have done.

Bless him.

There is a possibility that she will say she likes it

just because Luke has bought it and she so desperately wants to see him

and so desperately wants to please him.

I am worried that she won't be honest about it,

so I think we have got to be honest about it.

Here goes...

Will the dress wow the witches of Worksop?

Oh, Ellis!

ALL GASP ALL: Ohhh!!

-Turn round. Turn round.

-He's done us proud, Luke has!

ALL: Ohhh!

Look at that back!

-He knows you.

-Yeah, he does.

He knows you, babe.

-It's gorgeous.

-Good old Luke, eh?

Oh, I'm excited for tomorrow now!

LAUGHTER

-He absolutely got the biggest tick in that box.

-Yeah.

I love it.

-I love it.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

-Proud of him?

-Yeah.

Very proud, very proud.

We have got something to celebrate, I think, now, definitely.

-Yep.

-Cheers, Ellis.

-To Luke and the dress.

-Yeah, here's to Luke and the dress.

What about a veil?

-Are you allowed a veil?

-Yeah.

ALL GASP Oh, veil!

-Go and get them. I'm excited.

-I wouldn't have thought Lukey

-would have thought about a veil.

-I hope it matches.

No way!

-No way! That's

-BLEEP

-horrible!

-He's done so well with the dress and then done a great big

-BLEEP

-on it.

That is awful! It's awful.

-Are you having us on?

-I'm not.

-The money he has spent on that dress is wasted now, cos it looks a

-BLEEP.

Don't hold back, Dee.

Say what you really think(!)

-She's getting upset now.

-No, don't get upset.

You are all being horrible.

-We are not being horrible, we're being honest.

-You are.

You look and tell me that looks nice.

It might not look nice, but there is obviously a point to it.

It's fun.

I don't see you laughing.

But he has dropped a big bollock with that veil.

Why bother with the gown - the traditional, beautiful gown -

-why bother, to stick that on your

-BLEEP

-head?

So Dee is clearly livid, but Ellis is adamant

she will go with Luke's plan and wear the veil.

Over in Sheffield, our groom is oblivious to the unfolding drama,

although it is a wonder he didn't spot the air turning blue

for miles around. Still, the wedding is coming together.

Let us just hope it makes up for the pink.

It has been stressful. It has been stressful, the last few weeks.

It has been... It has all been talk, really,

and now we can actually do stuff, it is what we have all been waiting for.

As Luke and his team of helpers get busy preparing the venue,

back in Worksop there's a new set of stresses to deal with.

Smells of disaster....

..the whole thing.

Ellis has been told what time she'll be picked up tomorrow.

But no-one else in the bridal party knows what's going on.

I'm right stressed. I've got 15 bridesmaids to organise.

The fact that they need to know,

my guests need to know where t'location is

and a bit more specifics on times and...

I think in his mind as long as I'm there on time and I'm sorted,

he's not really bothered.

The not knowing, on the eve of the wedding,

is all getting a bit much, and mum Dee has decided to

take matters into her own hands and call the man himself.

I need to know - am I part of the bridal party

or have I got to make my own way there?

I've only arranged transport for Ellis.

You are joking?

-You're supposed to sort a

-BLEEP

-bus or taxis or summat.

Money is gone, money is gone on the wedding day.

Burger!

There's a train station down t'road.

Burger! They can't go on friggin' train.

-Burger, this is

-BLEEP.

-This is absolute

-BLEEP.

I-I don't... Dee, I...

It's not good enough.

God Almighty, I just hope you pull this off, Burgs,

because I'm really knocked out if you haven't.

I'm sorry.

It don't bode well for tomorrow.

I just...

I'm more scared now than I've been all t'way through.

It's the morning of the wedding. After the dramas of yesterday,

calm has descended, and Ellis, along with her mum, auntie Tracey

and dad Leigh, are feeling cautiously optimistic.

Do you know, there's two magpies in t'garden.

Two for joy.

I'm starting to think it might be in a church.

I think there's a distinct possibility it might be in a church.

The problem with optimism is, it's sometimes misplaced.

I think it's more the dress, because it's traditional.

Still don't know what I'm having on me feet either.

Well, she's about to find out -

one of Luke's friends has arrived bearing a mystery box.

-Mum!

-Aaaaahh!

I knew it. Oh, my God!

It just gets more and more bizarre, dunnit?

"So you can get to me quicker through the day, you sexy thing."

Jesus...

They're so cool, they've got the date on and everything.

(They don't go with that dress.)

I'm excited, right excited.

Everyone seems more calm today - yesterday it were awful,

we had the most stressful day yesterday.

Ellis' day of surprises is just getting started.

Thank God!

To her amazement, Luke's even arranged a hairdresser,

but things are about to take a different tone.

What do you mean, colour? Have you heard that, Mum?

I've lost the church feeling now.

You need to grow a pair, Ellis, don't let him walk all over you,

-it's your wedding day.

-What are you on about, "Walk all over me"?!

Well, you know what I'm saying.

-Let's do it, yes.

-She's got to have stupid colours in her hair.

What's that all about? It's dictating.

I hope this is not what he thinks he's going to do

when he's married to her.

Oh, my God!

It's absolute neon pink.

-I'm off my

-BLEEP

-head, aren't I?

You are, for allowing this to happen!

You'll freak!

Dee may not be impressed, but over in Sheffield her future

son-in-law is happily oblivious to the distress he's causing her.

Honestly, it's still not hitting me yet. I've got so much...

I've got stuff of mine, I need to get in there and sort stuff out.

The marquee guys are here, all my guys are here.

It's been stressful but it still doesn't feel like my wedding day,

I don't think it's going to hit until I see Ellis walking down the aisle.

Walking down the aisle with her army of 15 bridesmaids.

But will Luke's £11 bargain-basement dresses pass the Ellis test?

Surprise!

Oh, my God!

ALL: Aw!

You look so nice!

Honestly, you all look so nice.

Result!

Time for Ellis to show off her slightly more expensive dress...

and at least one of the bridal party is already getting emotional.

Her dad.

I'm father of the bride, I can do what I want.

Aw, bless him.

Oh, he's gone.

Aw, he's gone again.

It's lovely, that dress is gorgeous.

Can see why I get the pink now.

CHILDREN GIGGLE

You're like a great babby!

Her dad might be a sobbing mess,

but Ellis is taking everything in her stride.

She's taken everything really really well.

I think there will be a limit to it

if she has to do anything really crazy before the wedding.

No need to panic. All Ellis has to do now is wait for her transport

to arrive and, come on, just how crazy could that be?!

Oh...

PEOPLE EXCLAIM

Wow! Oh, my God!

That is awesome!

# Firestarter... #

That's a diamond, in't it, that?

What if it starts pissing it down?

Ellis, it's not like Luke would have sent an open-topped fire engine

without first checking the weather forecast.

This is awesome.

That has certainly impressed me.

Absolutely 100%, that has impressed me.

Dee is finally impressed with something that Luke's done.

So it should be plain sailing from here on in.

20 miles away in Sheffield, as the first guests arrive at

the venue, rather ominously, it's starting to rain, but Luke

isn't letting a little thing like drizzle dampen his spirits.

Obviously, I feel a bit bad for Ellis,

but I'd have got in it no matter what.

So I'm hoping Ellis has the same attitude as me.

Well, she got in it...

It's what happened since she got in it that's the problem.

Looks like it's broke down. Oh, God, it's smoking.

30 seconds away from home and it's smoking like an absolute bitch.

You couldn't write it, you couldn't write it, absolute sod's law.

It's raining an' all.

It's raining.

Two ticks.

You'll get to the church on time.

Church, nightclub, whatever.

But as the final guests arrive in Sheffield,

even Luke's harshest critics seem impressed.

Absolutely beautiful. Not what we expected. At all.

If it were a rave, I would have smashed his face in.

But don't you think there's still time?

There is still time.

-Either for a rave or to get his face smashed in.

-Both.

Form an orderly queue, ladies. Ellis may want to be first in line.

Still 40 minutes away, the good news is she's on the move.

The bad news is that the heavens have opened

and they still have no idea where they're headed.

Absolutely freezing.

My dress is getting piss-wet-through,

my flowers are getting ruined.

-He's an idiot.

-But at least he's a dry, warm idiot.

And one completely unaware of the impending arrival

of his increasingly angry bride-to-be.

I wanted to feel nice when I walked down t'aisle,

and I don't think I'm going to.

Finally, a decidedly wet and miserable Ellis

arrives at the Academy.

Can't believe it's here, I've never even been in here.

So, yeah, I'm getting married in a dirty nightclub,

covered in oil and rain.

Doesn't match up very well at the minute, at all,

to my image of my wedding day.

I drove all the way from Worksop to Sheffield in the rain!

We're in a nightclub. That was my biggest fear.

-If it's got sticky carpets and

-BLEEP

-toilets...

I may flip. There's a chance I'll flip.

It's the moment of truth for a very bedraggled bride.

And after three long weeks of waiting, will the surprise of

the marquee and seeing Luke for the first time make it all worthwhile?

This is it.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And the marquee isn't the only surprise.

The person carrying out the blessing has a very familiar face.

-Good afternoon, everyone.

-And hairdo.

We're all here today to celebrate

and witness the marriage of Luke and Ellis.

Luke is the most chilled-out person I have ever come across in my life.

You're a great friend, Burger,

and I know without a doubt you'll make an absolutely amazing husband.

Be good to Ellis and she'll be good to you.

Luke Stewart Reid, do you take Ellis Elizabeth Armstrong

to be your wedded wife for as long as you both shall live?

I do, aye.

CHEERING AND LAUGHTER

Do you take Luke Stewart Reid to be your wedded husband

for as long as you shall live?

I do.

Now for the part we've all been waiting for...

Bear in mind while I get the rings...

Have you got the rings?

I ain't got them.

LAUGHTER

-My gran's got 'em.

-Are you two kidding me?

You brought them for safekeeping and then...

We gave 'em you.

I thought you... I'd got to give them back.

LAUGHTER

Psych!

Congratulations. It's been a long three weeks - you may kiss the bride.

CHEERING

Aw, I'm happy now.

Got Luke back.

It feels like I've not seen you in months.

-Do you feel happy?

-Yeah.

It's been right good.

Ellis is finally reunited with Luke.

But before she can really get her hands on him,

one way or another there's work to be done.

The mission is now, now she's had her, "Oh, this is me nice wedding,"

now it's a case of us turning this place into a goddamn rave.

Getting the glowsticks snapped, getting people UV'd up

and start bouncing.

The marquee is dropped and the huge room transformed

for the rave reception.

While Ellis waits, the bridal party is allowed in for a sneak preview.

CHEERING

It's definitely a lot better than I thought it were going to be.

It's going to be such a good night, I can't wait.

I'm going to get in that thing over there.

It's fab, Ellis will love it. She'll absolutely love it.

Well, let's find out. For the second time today,

Ellis is walking into the same venue with no idea what's in store.

It's time to discover what all the secrecy has been about.

Finally!

CHEERING

MUSIC: Only Love by Ben Howard

All t'issues we had last year, splitting up

and getting back together and troubles we had...

You felt like you've got something to make up for, didn't you?

I had a point to prove.

He's done that. You've done that. He has done that.

Just want to keep loving each other no matter what, yeah?

-You've got me for ever.

-All right.

You've done good, kid. I'm saying it.

-I've not even got all my tricks out yet, either.

-Oh, God, please.

I've got a few more up my sleeve.

I love a good rave and when I hear the music

I feel it inside my veins, I feel it all over my body, right.

There's people here that haven't been tweaked.

That door hasn't been quite opened yet, right?

So I'm hoping that everyone, the aunties, the uncles,

the grannies, everyone like that are hopefully going to go,

-"What the

-BLEEP?"

And they're going to get into it themselves.

I can't stress this enough, Burger's set, it's his wedding day.

I want you all bouncing!

RAVE MUSIC PLAYS

Best part of today was obviously bagging the woman of my dreams

for the rest of my life, and also I did love my set.

We saved all the confetti cannons, all the LED foam batons,

all the glowsticks.

I don't think this is the party to end all parties.

As much as I might moan about it and think I'm trying to grow up a bit,

I do love a good party.

You are a party animal, but you're just more sensible than I am.

-You can still stoop down to my level.

-Let's meet in t'middle.

All right.

-Next time...

-CORK POPS

-OK...

-Camping-mad Rich...

-Yay!

-..plans an ambitious "great outdoors" wedding...

-This is lovely up here.

-..for his home-loving bride-to-be Jody.

Is Daddy going to do it all wrong?!

Has he left himself a mountain to climb?

That's the point up there where I want to get married.

Or will his wedding hit the rocks?

She's not going to get ready with her wedding dress

in a fricking tent, Richard.

Can today get any worse?

I can't do this any more. GLASS SMASHES

I just want to go home, man. I've had enough.

RAVE MUSIC PLAYS