The Prince and Me 2: The Royal Wedding

(CAR HORNS BLARE)

(CHURCH BELL TOLLS)

WOMAN: It's not that kind of wedding. They do everything for you.

(CHUCKLES) No, I won't be wearing a crown.

Mom, I've got to run. I'm late for class.

I love you. Bye.

MAN: Our most important consideration is our patients.

We have with us today a young volunteer from the clinic.

Mr Lars Jensen.

11 years old. Chest pains.

A rash on the abdomen.

(COUGHS)

And a cough.

Thoughts, anyone?

Bacterial pneumonia.

But, given the rash, it could be varicella.

Well, thank you for joining us, Ms Morgan.

Why don't you step down here and take a look?

Yes, Doctor.

Hi, Lars.

Hello.

Let's see that rash.

Doctor, would you mind handing me a cotton swab and some alcohol?

As you wish.

Thank you, Doctor.

This might be a bit cold.

Oooh. Looks like we have a severe case of viral blush.

(STUDENTS LAUGH)

Someone got into his mother's make-up.

But I do have a pain in my chest.

-Really?

-Yes.

My heart aches for you, Paige Morgan.

(STUDENTS LAUGH)

PAIGE: OK, wise guy. Go on. Get out of here.

(DOCTOR CLEARS THROAT)

-I did it!

-I did it! I met my future queen! She's a fox!

(STUDENTS LAUGH)

Hey, foxy lady.

Very funny.

Look, some of us are meeting back in my dorm room later to study.

-Do you want to come?

-I can't tonight.

-Danish lesson?

-Date with Edvard.

-A date?

-Mm-hm.

You two are getting married in three weeks.

I know, but it's just it's been so crazy lately

with school and planning the wedding,

and we haven't had any time alone together.

-So you two made a date.

-Mm-hm.

-See you tomorrow, all right, Jake?

-All right.

Bye.

-(GASPS) Soren!

-Whoops!

I'm afraid my duties don't extend to that sort of thing.

Soren, what are you doing here? Where's Eddie?

I regret to say that Edvard is tied up in parliament, Miss Paige.

-Again?

-I'm afraid so.

He apologises and asks for a "raincheck".

Is that what it's called?

(SIGHS)

-Soren?

-Yes, Miss Paige?

This isn't the way to the palace.

A small detour, if you don't mind.

There are some papers that need your signature.

They won't take but a minute.

In the east hall this time.

All right, Soren.

(KNOCKS LIGHTLY)

They're attracted to you.

How did you... (SIGHS)

I raided the entire blue monarch population of Europe.

But, you see, they wanted to come anyway.

You know, they say if you catch a butterfly,

you should whisper a wish and set it free.

(GASPS SOFTLY)

The butterfly carries the wish directly to the spirits.

Well, then, it must work.

Because my wish has already come true.

Come on.

WOMAN ON TELEVISION: Coming live from the royal palace,

with Their Majesties Rosalind and Haarald,

Crown Queen Paige and King Edvard.

Your Majesty, is it true that the two of you were lab partners

at the university?

Um, yes, I suppose you could say we literally had chemistry together.

(CHUCKLES) And so has Paige impressed you

with her ability to adapt to her new role?

Definitely, yes - taking on the responsibilities of being a queen

and studying to be a doctor, I think that's very impressive.

And what's been the most challenging aspect for you, Miss Paige?

The language. I mean, Danish is a beautiful language.

But it can be a challenge when you're learning.

I want so badly to be fluent.

(SPEAKS DANISH)

"I will be fluent in no time."

MAN ON TELEVISION: The royal wedding of King Edvard

and his wife-to-be, Miss Paige Morgan,

is just three weeks away.

Don't miss the live coverage here on...

(SWITCHES OFF TV) Is Haarald blind?

This girl's nothing more than a gold-digging commoner.

I wouldn't let her marry MY son.

You don't have to worry about that, sir.

One, you don't have a son.

And two, the only gold you have to be dug is in your teeth.

I'm the Third Prince of Norway once removed.

I'll not have sarcasm from the likes of you.

Yes, Your Royal Highness.

And I am just your humble accountant.

So, you insist, Henrick, that my funds are currently in short supply.

Actually, I might say that you're insolvent, bankrupt, penniless...

Enough. Enough.

If I had been born one prince less removed,

I'd have been very, very rich.

But that wouldn't have changed your poor betting history at the track.

Henrick, I didn't call you in here

to discuss my past financial ventures.

I called you in to show you this.

And this is...?

My salvation.

(DANCE MUSIC) (PEOPLE CHATTER, LAUGH)

-What do you mean?

-I did miss you.

-Oh, no he didn't.

That man is helpless when it comes down to dressing.

-Maybe "hopeless", you mean.

-(ALL LAUGH)

-Your Majesty, Your Highnesses.

-May I bring you something to drink?

Indeed you may. We absolutely crave a bottle of '83 Chateau Margaux.

-Excellent choice.

-Vlad, what is the occasion?

Huh! The occasion is I'm thirsty.

(ALL LAUGH)

Excuse me. Excuse me.

I'd actually like a beer. Whatever you have on tap would be good.

Ah! Now, you see, now, there is a true Dane.

Yes, I'll have a beer as well, please. Thank you.

We must stay around for the Margaux, eh?

Edvard, will you share the box at Monaco this year?

No, I can't make it this year.

I've got better things to do, like run the country.

-Oh, boohoo.

-Yes, boohoo.

Well, then, you'll miss none other than your favourite princess

popping the champagne and awarding the title in the champions' circle.

Carmilla, I'll be terminally bored if it's just you again.

-Oh, stop it.

-(LAUGHS)

And you, Paige? Please tell me you will make the race.

Oh, I don't think I'll be making any of the races this year.

I will be in the library, trying to make the grade.

(EDVARD CHUCKLES)

Ah, you see, there - there is my baby.

Gabby, perhaps instead of popping champagne in Monaco

you could pop a beer and start a new trend.

(VLADIMIR LAUGHS) Yeah, she is right!

Where is the wine? We need the wine.

You know, when I was young, I used to be terrified of these busts.

I used to think that they were all watching me

and they were going to come alive and chase me.

I can't imagine why. They look so friendly.

(CHUCKLES)

Well, my mother used to think that it was my fear

of not living up to my ancestors' expectations.

I suppose there was some kind of truth in that.

They don't look terribly approving, do they?

-I wonder what they'd say about us.

-They'd bust a move.

You get that? "Bust a move" - it's a joke.

Wow. Is my Danish as scary as whatever that just was?

Wow. See, I love that.

That's your happy smile.

As opposed to my unhappy smile?

No, as opposed to your trying smile, your diplomatic smile, your...

-Is that supposed to be me?

-Yeah.

Polite, authoritative. A little flare of the nostril.

Hmm.

Well, it seems you know me rather well.

The florists are very pleased,

and we need your approval on a centrepiece.

Uh, how about tomorrow after my biology class?

-Say, three o'clock?

-Fine.

Now, the tailors are hoping for

a final fitting for your wedding dress.

Oh! Um...I can't do it tomorrow at 9:00, though.

I've got applied anatomy. We're dissecting a gall bladder.

-(DOOR OPENS)

-Lovely.

Yes, Soren?

Queen Rosalind. Miss Paige.

I'm sorry to interrupt you,

but Prince Albert of Norway is in the library.

In our library? Albert? Now?

Yes, Your Majesty.

He came unannounced but says he has urgent business to discuss with you.

His Royal Highness and Edvard are on their way there.

Thank you, Soren. I will join them in the library.

Albert and Haarald went to school together.

-He's a friend of yours?

-Hardly.

Albert's always been jealous of our family.

Then why is he here now?

Urgent business usually means he's here to borrow money.

-Albert.

-Your Majesty.

Lovely as always.

-Haarald.

-Albert.

-You remember Edvard, of course.

-Of course.

I remember when you were learning to play chess

how you hated to lose your queen.

And now you're king. Funny how that happens, isn't it?

(LAUGHS)

Yes.

Um...right.

Enough of the small talk. How much do you need this time, Albert?

Haarald. You hurt my feelings. I'm not here for money.

(SPEAKS DANISH)

"With law shall the land be built."

This is an original copy of the Jutland Code,

first proclaimed in the town of Vordingborg in 1241 AD,

and one of the most significant doctrines...

We're familiar with the doctrine, Albert.

What is the meaning of bringing it here?

(CLEARS THROAT)

"Where a son succeeds the throne unwed,

"he must marry a woman of noble descent

"and ensure the monarchy.

"Whereupon such a woman does exist, he shall agree to marry her,

"otherwise surrender his position as king."

Is this some sort of joke?

No joke.

As it happens, my daughter, Princess Kirsten,

happens to be such a woman of noble birth

that the succession law applies to.

Your law is from the Middle Ages.

It's never been contested or rewritten.

Therefore, according to Danish constitution, it stands.

Edvard, why don't you join Paige in my quarters

and your father and I will speak to Albert alone.

This is absurd.

Ooph! Oh!

Sorry, sir. Didn't hear you coming.

You should work on your eavesdropping skills, Soren.

Yes, sir.

-Excuse me, sir?

-Mm-hm?

Would you like me to work on them now?

Splendid idea.

Thank you, sir.

Eddie, are you sure we shouldn't be worried?

Absolutely not.

Listen, in Norway, the tabloids affectionately refer to Albert

as "the Royal Pain".

And trust me, the title's well deserved.

And what about Kirsten? How well do you know her?

She was my best friend when we were young.

-What's she like?

-She's nice.

Paige, listen.

In three weeks, I'm going to marry the most captivating, beautiful girl

from Wisconsin.

And no law, no bankrupt idiot

is going to stop that from happening, OK?

Come here.

(SOREN CLEARS THROAT)

Soren. This is for you.

Why, thank you, Miss Paige.

Soren, what's wrong?

And what makes you think there's something wrong, sir?

You're smiling.

Well, I've just... received a present.

You've had this odd expression on your face ever since you arrived.

Has he not gone?

Actually, he has.

He went to the airport.

Ah, well, excellent. What's the problem?

He went there to pick up his daughter.

Princess Kirsten.

It just seems strange

that this obscure law suddenly takes precedence.

In Denmark, we adhere to the rule of law.

Mother, this is not a law. It's a plot hatched by some dimwit.

Though this particular law is antiquated,

I'm afraid it remains valid.

Every move we make in the coming weeks

will be of great consequence for us and for the state.

Our lawyers are the finest in the world.

They will discover a solution.

The solution is I marry Paige.

Of course it is, Edvard.

And your father and I will do everything in our power

to see that that happens.

Now, Albert has agreed to keep it out of the press.

That will give us the time to find a... How do you say it?

..a loophole in the law.

So, what do we do until then?

We continue to prepare for the wedding.

As far as anyone else is concerned,

Prince Albert of Norway is on a goodwill visit with his daughter.

Does Kirsten even know that her father is plotting this scheme?

Cos if she did, I don't think she'd go along with this.

Edvard, Paige, as King and Queen, you will find many will love you,

but some will seek to destroy you.

No matter the crisis, we must, at all times,

do what is right for the people.

Kirsten's arrived.

Oh, thank you so much for doing that.

Edvard?

Kirsten. I didn't recognise you.

Well, it has been nine years.

Mwah! How are you?

I'm very well.

This is Paige Morgan, my fiancee.

-Paige.

-Hi.

I have been absolutely dying to meet you.

The American girl who stole Denmark's heart.

Really, the pleasure is all mine.

Do get a move on, Kirsten. They're showing us to our rooms.

And I'm hungry. You can reminisce later.

Sorry.

Well, Paige, let's get together later,

and I will tell you every embarrassing story about Edvard

that he doesn't want you to know.

And you.

We've got some catching up to do, haven't we? (CLICKS TONGUE)

"The cutaneous nerve branches

"to the lateral thoracic wall

"are derived from the...?"

-Intercostal nerves.

-Very good.

I just don't understand why he wanted to have dinner with her alone.

"During development, the limb bud that forms the upper extremity

"rotates approximately 90 degrees in what direction?"

Laterally.

He said she'd be more forthcoming without me present.

Ah, yes, yes.

"True or false - all cervical vertebrae

"have bifid spinous processes."

False. It would help if she didn't look like a supermodel.

Perhaps we should move on to your Danish lesson.

-Sorry.

-No need for apologies.

But if you don't mind my saying, Miss Paige,

you have nothing to be jealous of.

I'm not jealous.

Who would be jealous of a gorgeous, blonde Norwegian princess?

Well, if my opinion is of any consolation,

I think that, frankly...

How do they say it in the States?

..girl got nothin' on you.

Yo.

Edvard, look, I just want you to know

that I feel so embarrassed by my father's behaviour.

Oh, well, he's, um...

I mean, your poor fiancee must think I'm some evil witch

trying to take her place.

Not at all. I told her there's no way you could have been involved in this.

So she doesn't hate me?

No! No. No, no.

Um...do you know, actually, I think you two would get on very well.

Mmm. She seems like a great girl.

Yeah, she is.

She'd have to be, wouldn't she, to land a guy like you.

Oh... (CHUCKLES) ..well, that's very kind of you to say so.

-It's been a long time.

-Mmm. I know.

I was remembering one of the times I came to spend the summer here.

I think I was about eight years old, so you must have been, what...

-I was about...

-Ten?

Ten, yes.

I distinctly remember going up to your bedroom

and asking if you wanted to play.

And you turned around very seriously

and said to me, "Kirsten, we're no longer children, you know.

"You don't ask someone if they want to play.

BOTH: "You ask them to do something."

Anyway, look, I'm here to help.

I hope you know that.

Yes, I do, and I thank you.

Um...

It's nice to see you again, Kirsten.

And you.

-Cheers.

-Cheers.

Hey, Mom. It's me.

I guess you're out starting your day. I'm just about to go to bed.

But I just wanted to call and tell you that...

(SIGHS)

..everything's great and I can't wait for you to get here.

Kiss Dad for me.

KIRSTEN: Paige, I'm so glad you've agreed to talk to me.

My father's acting like a complete fool.

I'm so sorry he's causing such drama just weeks before your wedding.

-Can I ask you something?

-Anything.

Why is your father even doing this if it isn't something that you want?

Because it's not about what I want.

It's about him wanting to live vicariously through me.

You know, being married to a king - a title he'll never have.

-That kind of stuff.

-Right.

And actually, my personal theory is that he's having a midlife crisis.

My own father had one of those at 40. He got an earring.

-Oh, tragic.

-Mmm.

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

Paige?

(PAIGE AND KIRSTEN CHATTER AND LAUGH)

It's like...like the top of... (LAUGHS)

Good morning.

-Oh, good morning.

-MAN: Your Majesty.

(WOMEN LAUGH) What's so funny?

Oh, nothing.

We were just eating and I said something about toast

and she thought I said "toes" and...I guess you had to be there.

Ah. Sounds hilarious.

Eddie, it was funny.

You know what? We should go.

Oh, uh, yeah.

Um, I will be back in a little bit.

Are you two going somewhere?

Kirsten's going to show me some of her favourite sights in Copenhagen.

Oh. You're going shopping.

See you later.

Yeah, well, leave some money in the treasury.

-(COOS) Hello!

-Hello, Miss Paige.

You're just so cute.

Look at you.

Look at you!

(BABBLES)

Your outfit is so nice.

-Maybe he's just having a bad day.

-(CAMERAS CLICK)

How much longer is Kirsten in town for?

Don't know. Hopefully long enough to stir things up.

This fairytale romance is getting boring.

I want the best lawyers and judges in the country

working around the clock on this.

My colleagues and I are confident we'll crack this case within a week.

Good. We must resolve this matter quickly and quietly.

We've got a wedding to attend.

-Hey, Paige.

-Oh, hey.

-You off to the library?

-Yes. Where are you off to?

I'm going into town. I need to pick something up.

But I'll meet you and Edvard at the restaurant later.

-Great.

-Cool.

Oh. Are you going to stop back by here to change?

Um...probably not. This place is pretty casual.

-Have a nice day.

-Thanks. You too.

(DANCE MUSIC)

-I thought this place was casual.

-No, you're fine. Don't worry.

Greetings, lovebirds.

Paige!

How is it that you manage to look so smashing in everything you wear?

Kirsten. You changed.

Right, yeah, I had to - I met this dreamy guy in Old Town,

but he managed to spill his drink all over me.

Well, the rogues' gallery here is already assembled.

Shall we wander up?

After you.

-Hi.

-Hello.

Hi!

-Oh, hi. Hi.

-Kirsten!

-KIRSTEN: Hi, girls.

-Naughty, Kirsten.

It's just like you!

To barnstorm Denmark with no advance press, huh?

KIRSTEN: Gabby! How are you? It's been so long.

-You look delectable.

-Well, that's the point, isn't it?

But really, Kirsten, why all the hush-hush?

-Hi, Paige.

-Hi.

Edvard, I want you two to one on the green this year.

-No. No time for polo, Vlad.

-You mean no time for fun.

(MOBILE PHONE RINGS)

Yes, hello.

-I've got to take this. One sec.

-OK.

Paige. Should we order you a beer?

I'll...try the wine.

Mmm.

Tell all. Are you still with that guy? What was his name?

CARMILLA: The prince from Greece?

No, not that bronzed Adonis, no. The norm.

Oh, the bartender.

I remember. Your parents were beside themselves.

I dated a norm just before Vlad.

Wait. So, both of you dated a guy named Norm?

(OTHERS LAUGH)

Oh, no, no. That's not the case.

"Norm" is just a nickname.

-Oh.

-GABRIELLE: Yeah, for a commoner.

You know, like "the norm" - "regular person".

I-I mean...

That didn't come out right.

KIRSTEN: We're being idiots.

Paige, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to sound like a snob.

Gabby was just referring to the whole...culture clash thing.

You know, coming from such different worlds,

sometimes it can really cause problems.

But you and Edvard don't have anything to worry about.

His parents love you, Denmark loves you, and so do we.

GABRIELLE: Oh! There's Edvard.

I propose a toast. To Paige of Denmark.

Ah. Cheers.

-VLADIMIR: Cheers.

-GABRIELLE: Cheers, everyone.

Cheers.

What did I miss?

(KNOCK AT DOOR) Come in.

Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait!

(SPEAKS DANISH)

Very good!

I was going to say, "Come shopping," but I see you're studying, so...

(SIGHS) Trying.

Hey, it's a difficult language. Don't give up.

I just feel like I can understand so much more than I can speak.

That's rubbish.

The problem isn't you - it's what they're teaching you.

I mean...trust me. I speak seven languages.

The only way to learn is to completely immerse yourself in it.

I picked up more French living in St Tropez for five months

than I did studying it for five years.

ROSALIND: So, my dear Paige, how is your Danish coming along?

-Well...

-KIRSTEN: She's doing terribly well.

I've been helping her with her lessons.

-That's very kind of you, Kirsten.

-Yes.

Paige is dedicated to learning Danish quickly.

So, Paige, tell us some interesting news.

OK. Um, let's see.

(SPEAKS DANISH)

(LAUGHS)

(ALL FALL SILENT)

(LAUGHS)

Well, it is a tricky...

..language, our Danish.

Why don't we retire to the drawing room for dessert?

Splendid idea.

Did I do something wrong?

Um, well, you called my mother a donkey.

A green donkey, in fact.

No - I said she had a green thumb

and that she waves her hand and flowers grow.

You know, because of her orchids.

I don't even know the word for donkey.

Oh, you do. You do.

Um, but you know what? It's great pronunciation.

(RADIO CLICKS)

WOMAN ON RADIO: Good morning, Copenhagen.

Here's the latest from the States - the hot new single from the Drop.

SONG: # Waking up, waking up... # (KNOCK AT DOOR)

# I can hear, I can hear... # Rise and shine!

# I'm not worried... #

(GASPS) I love this song!

# Here it comes

# I'm not worried

# I'm going to send down your gun... #

It's just a shame I can't dance.

Anyway, I have a little surprise for you.

-A little goodie.

-Oh, well.

Whoa! It's the dress I tried on in the store.

Yeah. I could see how much you liked it, so I couldn't resist.

-I can wear it to the shower today.

-Hey, that's a great idea.

Thank you, Kirsten.

-Wow. That was nice.

-It's my pleasure.

At last. Our guest of honour.

Birgitta. It looks beautiful.

A beautiful luncheon for a beautiful bride.

-I really appreciate you doing this.

-Not at all.

And you look marvellous. What a lovely outfit.

Um...thank you.

Paige? Are you all right?

Yeah. I'm all right. Just a little itch.

Well, come.

ROSALIND: What beautiful sculptures.

BIRGITTA: Thank you. They're Benigni, 17th century.

We just got them at Sotheby's. Aren't they fabulous?

Lovely.

-Do you feel itchy?

-Itchy?

-Yeah.

-No.

Hmm. I thought maybe there was something in the air.

EDVARD: Afternoon, ladies.

Edvard, perfect timing. Paige is just about to open gifts.

Ah. Perhaps I should come back tomorrow.

(WOMEN LAUGH)

OK. I will go ahead and start with this one.

It's from Vivian.

(GRUNTS SOFTLY)

Paige.

Oh, sorry. OK.

Oooh.

Nice.

(WOMEN GIGGLE)

Paige, what are you doing?

I don't know. I'm just so itchy.

Well, I am going to open that one.

Let's see. We've got a card here.

-Paige, we've got a card.

-Oh. Hmm.

"Paige and Edvard, To a life..."

(GRUNTS SOFTLY)

"To a life filled with love... life, love and happiness.

"From Greta."

Greta, thank you.

Yes, well...

..let's see what's in here.

Oh! Tongs.

WOMEN: Oooh!

-Tongs, Paige.

-Mmm. Nice.

We were just...

We were just talking about tongs yesterday,

and how much we needed them.

Thanks.

EDVARD: Let's open the other one. This one.

Oooh. Heavy prezzie.

EDVARD: Look at this.

WOMEN: Ohhh!

EDVARD: Oooh.

WOMEN: Ohhh!

Oooh!

(ALL GASP)

(SCULPTURE SHATTERS)

PAIGE: Oh, I'm so sorry!

I-I am so sorry.

Excuse me. Mmm!

I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

Yes.

WOMAN: Did you see her?

I think she was taken with the tongs.

(PAIGE GASPS)

EDVARD: Paige?

What just happened there? Are you all right?

Y-yeah. I'm fine. I... No! I don't know! I just...

I'm so embarrassed.

It feels like there's ants crawling all over my body.

You've probably had a reaction to something. Calm down.

Paige, are you OK? Is there anything I can do to help?

No. I think you've done enough, Kirsten.

Um...just...

Paige, wait.

So you think Kirsten had something to do with it.

I just feel like the more Kirsten acts like my friend,

the more things happen to go wrong.

Look...

You are under a lot of pressure right now.

You've got Kirsten and her family staying here.

Uh...Albert, who doesn't seem to like you.

You have your studies.

But I think you're confusing father and daughter,

and quite frankly, acting a bit paranoid.

I know Kirsten.

She would never do the things you're accusing her of doing.

Come on. Just go and talk to her. You two can work this out.

For me?

For me?

Come on.

Kirsten?

Kirsten?

(SIGHS)

-(DOOR OPENS)

-KIRSTEN: There you are.

I've been looking for you.

Wow. Kirsten. You scared me.

Paige. What are you doing in my room?

Well, I was coming by to...apologise.

But then I found this.

You almost had me.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Oh, come on, Kirsten. I know what this is.

Urushiol resin is what they find in poison ivy

that causes an allergic reaction in the skin.

I'm just a guest here, Paige.

That could very easily belong to the person

who stayed in this room before me.

Right, so the Duke of Windsor is out there somewhere

missing his after-shower itching powder.

-May I see?

-Mmm.

Hmm.

(CHUCKLES)

You know, I knew that powder was going to work,

but I didn't realise it was going to work quite so well.

I mean, the Benigni statue into the cake? Paige, that was priceless.

I can't believe I actually envied you.

Oh, don't feel bad. It's only natural that you would.

I mean, you're a sweet girl, Paige,

but let's face it,

you're a little out of your league here.

It's not your fault. You got swept up in a fairytale.

I understand.

But, you see, the problem is

Eddie was never meant to marry someone who was born to milk cows.

(LAUGHS) Edvard and I are getting married in a week.

Don't you know to give up when the game is already lost?

There is no game, Paige.

There are only royals and norms.

And I'm afraid they just don't go together.

No matter how hard they might try.

Does Edvard know you feel this way? He might find it very interesting.

(SCOFFS) Oh, go ahead. Tell Edvard anything you like.

Please. I dare you.

Eddie and I have known each other all our lives.

It will just end up an ugly little case of my word against yours.

So, by all means, make more trouble for yourself.

Give Eddie yet another reason to feel

that marrying you is just one big mistake.

EDVARD: Hello? (KNOCKS ON DOOR)

Ah.

So, you two sorted things out?

We're fine. It was just a little misunderstanding.

Good.

Cos the last thing I need right now

is my oldest, dearest friend and my fiancee

at odds with one another.

I'll be downstairs.

I wanted to tell him but I just couldn't.

I mean, he seemed so relieved that everything was OK.

So what? Are you afraid you're going to disappoint him?

Afraid? No. I just... I mean, what difference is it going to make?

It's not going to change the law,

it's not going to help find a loophole.

It's only going to put more pressure on Eddie.

I'm just going to have to deal with this on my own.

Well, what are you going to do?

Beat her at her own game.

MAN: Ladies and gentlemen, may we have your attention, please?

-King Edvard.

-(PEOPLE APPLAUD)

Thank you.

Thank you.

It's an honour for me to be here today

and I would especially like to thank the Copenhagen Historical Society

for making this event possible.

For decades, this ship proudly served

our nation's greatest industry,

and today we're here to celebrate the commencement

of the restoration of "King Clupea".

(PEOPLE APPLAUD)

(SOFTLY) That's your diplomatic smile.

I'm sorry Edvard couldn't stay for lunch, Mr Christianson.

Oh, I fully understand.

Thank you so much for including my father and me in this celebration.

Oh, we are honoured to have you here, Princess Kirsten.

Thank you.

I love the name of the ship.

Isn't "Clupea" the scientific name for herring?

Why, yes, it is. Miss Paige, most people don't know that.

Hmm.

I was reading the other day about how Margaret I of Denmark

had to battle Norway for Scandinavian supremacy.

She ran naval gauntlets to keep the city supplied with food.

She wouldn't have had to go to such extremes, of course,

if she'd had the support of local fishermen.

Actually, Kirsten, I believe you're mistaken.

Margaret was revered by the local fishermen.

They felt she was the only one who could identify with their needs.

Or perhaps it was because she was a true royal

and the commoners knew that she was qualified to lead them.

In any case, she issued a royal warrant,

giving the Norwegians one week to vacate Denmark.

Indeed she did.

Miss Paige, I must say, I'm impressed

with your breadth of knowledge.

You have truly embraced Denmark as your country.

So, shall we start?

Absolutely. This looks fabulous.

Paige, I imagine you're excited to dine on the national delicacy -

lumpfish caviar.

Oh. Lumpfish. Mmm.

(WOMAN GASPS)

(CAMERAS CLICK RAPIDLY)

MAN: Madam.

You may want to eat the caviar not with the silver fork

but with the caviar spoon,

to prevent the metal from ruining the taste.

Oh.

(FOOTSTEPS RECEDE)

KIRSTEN: We're having caviar again tonight, Paige.

Don't forget your fork!

Hmm!

(PEOPLE APPLAUD)

We all extend our heartfelt thanks to Crown Queen Paige

for her generous sponsorship of today's Great Masters charity event.

Crown Queen Paige.

Thank you, Mrs Lawrenson.

You, my friends, are gathered here today

to support a cause that is near and dear to my heart -

to all our hearts.

The donations made today will provide medicine to the world's neediest.

And now I would like to introduce, from Rome,

piano maestro Mikael Elestroni,

who has agreed to entertain us today with excerpts from "The Magic Flute".

Maestro Elestroni.

It's an honour.

(PLAYS "QUEEN OF THE NIGHT" FROM "THE MAGIC FLUTE")

(SINGS ARIA)

(WOMAN GASPS)

-Mother!

-Help! Is there a doctor in the house?

Help!

MAN: Is there a doctor around?

Scusa.

She's my mother. Her name is Benta. She gasped and passed out.

-Has this happened before?

-No.

-Any conditions? Diseases? Asthma?

-No.

Epilepsy?

Benta?

Benta, can you hear me?

Benta, wake up.

Ah, there you go.

Benta, you passed out. Everything's fine.

-Are you OK?

-Oh, I think so.

Try to sit up. Your chest wall is constrained.

Oh. Oh!

It appears to be a fainting spell.

Yes. The singing was too much for her. Aw!

(PEOPLE LAUGH)

(JOHANN STRAUSS JR'S 'THE BLUE DANUBE' PLAYS)

Ah, ladies. Right, here we go.

-One for you.

-Thank you.

-One for you.

-Thank you very much.

And one for me. Thank you.

-Cheers.

-BOTH: Cheers.

Listen, duty calls. One sec.

Maybe they can play 'Madame Butterfly' and you can sing.

Or maybe they can fiddle 'Some Day My Prince Will Come'

and you can dream on.

Ladies and gentlemen. Ladies and gentlemen.

Can I have your attention, please?

I'd like to invite King Edvard and Crown Queen Paige

onto the dance floor to lead us in the Snurrebocken.

Actually, I would like to give my dance to Princess Kirsten,

as I am confident she does a finer Snurrebocken than I.

-(EDVARD CHUCKLES)

-MAN: That's charming.

(LAUGHS) Uh, no, no, no. Paige.

No, really. Really, I insist.

(PEOPLE APPLAUD)

(JOHANN STRAUSS SR'S 'RADETZKY MARCH' PLAYS)

Go on. I love to watch you dance.

Are you ready?

-(KIRSTEN GASPS)

-Oh!

(PEOPLE GASP)

I'm so sorry!

OK, OK. I'm OK.

-Are you all right?

-OK.

Five, six, seven, eight.

-Yah!

-(GASPS)

(PEOPLE LAUGH, EXCLAIM)

(PEOPLE GASP)

Y-you all right?

(DRESS TEARS)

Oh, dear.

(PEOPLE CHATTER, LAUGH)

Should I...

-Is she all right?

-I think so.

All right. It's fine. Right.

MAN: Lovely.

-So, how did you get so good at this?

-It's the polka, only fancier.

(HUFFS) Tonight was a disaster.

How dare that little wannabe try and make a fool out of me?

Well, Kirsten, I let you do it your way.

Now I'm out of patience - and funds.

This little charade is over.

-You wanted to see me?

-It's all over the papers.

Oh, dear.

Oh.

How did this happen?

That's what we'd like to know.

Well, you don't think it was me.

Why would I risk alienating the entire country of Denmark

just days before the wedding?

This is a delicate matter

and I gave you my word.

I'm a man of my word.

It's time we turned the crude instrument of the media

to our own advantage.

-A press conference? When?

-Tomorrow at 2:30.

-I've got class at 1:00.

-Paige, look.

This is really, really important.

I guess I could leave early.

Are you sure?

Yeah. Shouldn't be a problem.

OK. Well, look, I'll get Soren to pick you up at 2:00.

OK? Got that? 2:00.

Thank you.

DOCTOR: But of course we must remember,

when comparing one antibody to another,

that these amino acid sequences are quite distinct.

Shoot! I'm late.

I've got to go.

And...that's toxicity in blood transfusions.

I know. I know.

(SIGHS)

She'll be here any moment.

(CAR HORNS BEEP)

What's going on?

It's an accident, I believe.

We can't wait any longer.

Finally.

(CAR TYRES SCREECH)

King Edvard, can you tell us your reaction

when you first heard about the succession rule?

Uh, well, disappointment at first, and surprise.

But we need to have the flexibility to re-examine

archaic rules of this nature.

Your Majesty, is it meaningful

that Miss Paige is not here with you today?

-(DOOR OPENS)

-She...

But I'm here! (CAMERAS CLICK)

Sorry I'm late.

REPORTERS: Miss Paige! Miss Paige!

Just one question at a time, please.

Miss Paige, do you intend to go ahead with the marriage?

Of course. The succession law does not change my feelings for Edvard.

Are you concerned about the reaction of the Danish people to the news?

Well, I've come to believe that the Danish people are among

the most kind and forward-thinking people on this planet.

I trust their reaction will be supportive and understanding.

King Edvard, would you be willing to abdicate the throne to marry Paige?

Um, sir, that is a thoughtless question.

But, Your Majesty, if no legal solution can be found,

would you relinquish the monarchy in order to marry Paige Morgan?

Um...

Sir, once again, I'm confident that will not happen.

Miss Paige, would you ask King Edvard to abandon the crown

in order to marry you?

-She...she...

-Uh...

(WHISPERS)

In my country, we aren't bound by such unusual customs.

We're free to marry whomever we love.

Crown Queen Paige, do you not consider Denmark to be your country?

-(REPORTERS MURMUR)

-(CAMERAS CLICK)

(ROSALIND SIGHS)

But this is not at all what I meant.

My dear Paige, there are certain things

that the Danish people take very seriously.

Pride in their monarchy is one of them.

But I love Denmark and I love all of you.

This was taken completely out of context.

The press does not know the meaning of context.

They care about one thing - selling papers.

You should know that by now.

KIRSTEN: I've had no luck breeding hybrids.

They're very sensitive, aren't they?

ROSALIND: Mmm.

I've found that more light helps. I give mine 12 hours a day.

Ah. I'll have to try that.

And these are just gorgeous.

You really do have a way with flowers.

Thank you. A personal hobby.

EDVARD: Paige.

(SIGHS) I've been looking for you everywhere.

Actually, I was looking for you too.

-Hey.

-Hey.

-You OK?

-Yeah, fine.

I wanted to talk to you about tonight.

Yes. Precisely. I wanted to talk to you about it.

I've got a meeting at six o'clock,

and then after, I thought we could go for a meal somewhere.

Just the two of us.

I was going to ask you if maybe we could eat early

because I have a study group and it's probably going to go late.

Right. OK.

It's just that exams are, you know...

Yes, yes. I know. In two weeks. Um...

OK, look, I could reschedule and then...

Well, no, I wouldn't want you to do that. It's too important.

Um...no, you're right. OK.

-Well, Eddie, if you'd prefer...

-No, no. It's fine. It's fine.

Are you sure?

Yes.

Yes, it's fine.

-STUDENTS: Bye, Paige.

-Oh, don't forget this.

-Oh. Thanks.

-You're going to want that.

Bye, guys. Thank you.

So? How do you feel?

Well, I feel a little shaky on immunoglobulins

but other than that...

No, I'm not talking about the exam, Paige.

I'm talking about the tabloids and the stuff with Kirsten.

(SIGHS)

I don't know. I just...

I mean, I want nothing more in the world than to marry Edvard.

But all this stuff with Kirsten and the tabloids...

It's going to be all right.

(SIGHS) Are you sure?

Paige, you are an amazing girl.

And you are going to make an incredible doctor.

But will I make a good queen?

Yes.

Denmark is lucky to have you.

Thank you, Jake. I appreciate your...dishonesty.

It's the truth. Come here.

Gotcha! (TAKES PHOTOS)

I thought you went there to study.

I did. We were. Eddie, this is ridiculous.

Is it? I mean, you...

You two look awfully comfortable.

(SIGHS)

Jake is my friend.

After everyone left, we were talking.

I was telling him about everything we'd been through,

everything we had to deal with,

and so he hugged me.

-That was it.

-I see.

-What? What?

-Nothing.

Eddie, come on.

You don't actually think that...

..after everything I've been through...

I'm so tired of having to defend myself against these stupid tabloids.

Well, the point is, you shouldn't have to.

-Exactly.

-No. You're not hearing me.

You shouldn't even allow yourself

to be put in any situation remotely compromising.

It's time you start acting less like a...

Like a what?

And what exactly have you been through?

Like a what, Eddie? Like a norm?

Paige, for better or for worse,

things are done differently around here.

I know.

And when you allow your actions to be misinterpreted in any way at all,

you affect much more than yourself.

Like you, right?

Right. I didn't say that, but, yes, like me.

Like...my family, like the entire monarchy.

Do you know the risk I've taken with you?

I mean, do you think...

..do you think this has been easy on me?

Easy on you?

Maybe Kirsten's right.

Right about what?

Oh, come on, Eddie.

I may not think like a royal, but I'm far from stupid.

And contrary to what you may think, I am not paranoid.

Well, what are you talking about? What?

Whether you choose to see it or not,

Kirsten has been trying to come between us

from the moment she arrived.

And the funny thing is, I'm starting to think she's right.

Maybe she does belong here more than I do.

No, Paige, look, I don't feel that way.

I don't feel that way about her.

Maybe you don't think you do.

But inside you can feel something's wrong.

Kirsten coming, the loophole, the tabloids.

Maybe it's all just a sign.

-Paige...don't, Paige...

-No.

When that reporter asked you how you felt about abdicating the throne,

your only answer was that it wouldn't come to that.

But what if it does?

Are you really prepared to give this all up?

W...

I suddenly feel very embarrassed.

-Paige, listen.

-No, no. I...

I started to believe in fairytales.

What are you doing?

I'm sorry, Eddie.

(CLEARS THROAT)

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

Yes?

Hi.

May I come in?

Edvard, I heard what happened.

And I'm so sorry.

I know how hard this must be for you.

I just somehow feel it's all my fault.

Yes, well, blaming yourself won't help.

I know, and I'm sorry. I don't mean to make this about me.

I just feel bad.

You know, I was thinking that, um...

..that maybe this was impossible from the start.

Well, our world is so very different from most people's.

Yeah.

You know, Edvard, we've known each other all our lives.

I never would have predicted we'd be in this situation.

I honestly thought my father was crazy.

But the truth is, the more I'm here, the more it makes me wonder...

Wonder what?

Eddie...

..maybe no-one's found a loophole

because a loophole isn't meant to be found.

You have to marry before your 23rd birthday,

which is only three days after your wedding day -

the day that you're bound by Danish law

to take a Scandinavian princess as your bride.

Maybe that's no coincidence.

Maybe that's fate...

..bringing us together.

Miss Paige, this is silly.

I think you should come back to the palace.

-I can't.

-Why not?

You know the answer to that, Soren.

Besides, I'm only here until exams are over, and then...

..I guess, back to the States.

Miss Paige, you know, in my youth, I was a footballer -

excuse me, a soccer player -

in one of the best junior leagues in Denmark.

It may be hard to believe looking at me now, but I was rather good.

One of the top players in the country for my age, actually.

The year I turned 16,

I played in a championship game that drew scouts from all over Europe.

Suddenly, there were expectations and pressures I never knew existed.

In any event, I...spent the whole game trying to impress the scouts,

and in doing so, I ended up trying too hard.

As a result, I played the worst game of my life.

You see, Miss Paige,

I'd forgotten why I was there in the first place.

Why were you there?

Because I loved the game.

Always did.

(CLEARS THROAT)

Goodbye, Miss Paige.

Bye, Soren.

I'm sorry, Edvard.

I know how difficult this must be for you.

But we must protect the monarchy.

So...

..so, what are you saying?

Are you saying that I should marry Kirsten?

I'm saying that sometimes we have to do what's best for the people,

not what's best for ourselves.

Hey, Mom.

I'm OK.

Um, I'm calling to tell you...

..well, it's about the wedding.

Um...

Do you think it's too late for you to get a refund for your plane ticket?

(CRIES)

I've decided to go through with the marriage.

To Princess Kirsten?

Well, I've given a little thought to what she said about fate, and...

-..I think she's onto something.

-But, sir...

SONG: # Why am I here, lying wide awake?

# Sleeping soundly as the earth shakes

# I can foresee the way you'll make me feel

# After the fact, before you can believe

# Slow down now

# No, you can't stop

# No, you can't stop

# Slow down now... #

(MUSIC FADES OUT)

-He doesn't love her.

-What?

The way he's looking at her. It's his diplomatic smile.

It's not his 'smile' smile. Look.

It's OK. I take your word for it.

I have to find a loophole, but I don't know where to look.

I might.

What? Where?

The repository of ancient documents.

Which is...?

Which is housed right here on campus.

In the law building.

Hurry, Jake! The wedding is tomorrow!

Paige, wait! We need help!

Now, look, my law school friends are a little weird.

But the thing is, nobody cares about these books except for them.

Where is the repository? Up here?

(ALL LAUGH)

You're standing on it. It's in the catacombs.

-How far is it?

-Not too far, I hope.

Wow!

We are close now.

-Jake, what time is it?

-Um, nearly 8:00.

We've got 14 hours to find that loophole.

And 14,000 books to look through.

(SIGHS) And I thought organic chemistry was hard.

Don't worry. Erik will tell us what to look for.

ERIK: I'll write the words for you.

WOMAN: It's morning here in Denmark,

as we report live from Copenhagen's Grand Cathedral.

An estimated 50,000

will line the streets this afternoon at one o'clock

to witness the royal wedding cortege of King Edvard and Princess Kirsten.

-Jake, we're never going to...

-Yes, we will.

We've got two hours.

Erik, I think I might have something.

Look.

Uh-uh.

Don't give up.

Can you bring my car around immediately? Thank you.

Edvard. Edvard.

Where are you going?

I've got no choice.

That's the King.

Paige?

Paige?

No, we're out of time.

Eddie.

Paige, uh...

There's so much I need to say to you.

I know I upset you when I said...

..being with you was a risk.

But the truth is, nothing is really worthwhile in life

unless you do take a risk.

That's why I took the risk with continuing the wedding with Kirsten.

I thought it would provide me with the cover I need

to find a loophole in the law.

But unfortunately we... we failed.

Eddie, I...

So, you know, if this means that I have to give up the throne, then...

..so be it.

I love you, Paige Morgan.

I love you and I cannot spend my life without you.

I'm sorry, Eddie. I can't let you give up the throne.

Which is why you'll need this.

(LAUGHS)

You...you found it.

Yep. The loophole.

(LAUGHS) How on earth did you...?

Oh! I love you!

Whoo!

Hold on.

We've got to go.

We've got to go.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Yes!

(TYRES SCREECH)

Soren. I need your help.

Yes, sir.

Very good, sir.

(ALL CHEER)

REPORTER: We are so excited.

Their Majesties Rosalind and Haarald are arriving at the Grand Cathedral

for the royal wedding of King Edvard and Princess Kirsten.

You look absolutely lovely, Miss Kirsten.

Just a little tense. Have some tea.

-No. I don't want tea.

-It'll help with your nerves.

-I'm not nervous.

-Just a sip.

I don't...! (GASPS)

Look what you've done!

I am in great distress, madam.

-Allow me to help you clear that up.

-(GROANS)

No, you're making it worse! Stop it, you idiot!

(GASPS)

Well, don't just stand there!

Do something!

Hold on. You have to recite the entire constitution.

I don't have to memorise it. I just have to read it before parliament.

-In Danish.

-Oh.

Here. You'd better get started.

-Excuse me, Soren.

-I'm sorry, sir.

Miss Kirsten asked not to be disturbed.

-Is something wrong?

-Oh, no. She's perfectly fine.

-She just wanted some time alone.

-Oh.

You know how young ladies are in these situations.

In fact, she wanted me to tell you to meet her at the church.

She wants it to be a surprise.

I believe there's free food in the limo.

Well...

..tell her to hurry up, would you?

(TYRES SCREECH)

This is impossible.

Look, you'll be fine. You can do this, OK?

-Oooh!

-(TYRES SCREECH)

Ah!

Mmm!

-(TYRES SCREECH)

-(Horses whinny)

REPORTER: My word, there's a...

-It's King Edvard!

-(CROWD CHEERS)

And, ladies and gentlemen, this is a new development.

It's Paige Morgan! Paige Morgan is entering the cathedral.

Mother.

Soren told me everything.

(SIGHS) Thank you.

Come, my dear Paige.

We have precisely 10 minutes to turn you into a queen.

Come on, everyone. Let's give the princess some privacy.

Oh, wait! I'm ready to go now.

Yes, Miss Kirsten.

I'll be back in a jiffy.

Karl?

They're asking for you in the stables

and I think it's some kind of emergency.

-You'd better go.

-Thank you, sir.

-(HORSE WHINNIES)

-(HOOFS CLOP)

Giddy-up!

What? That's my carriage!

Go! Go!

Oh!

Daddy!

-Come on! Yah!

-(CROWD CHEERS)

REPORTER: The royal coach is finally approaching the cathedral

and it's quite a sight.

Stop!

Could it be that Princess Kirsten is...

No, wait - the coach is empty.

Where on earth could Princess Kirsten be?

(THUMP!)

(WHIMPERS)

Ow.

Ah! Soren. Where's Kirsten?

Miss Kirsten will be along in a minute.

-In a minute? But that's...

-Oh, dear.

-What?

-You have a smudge.