Puss in Boots


Puss in Boots

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GUITAR STRUMMING RHYTHMIC CLAPPING

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ORCHESTRA PLAYS FLAMENCO MUSIC

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WHIP CRACKS

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'Through the years, I have been known by many names.

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'Diablo Gato.

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'The Furry Lover.

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'Chupacabra.

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'Friskie Two-Times.

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'And the Ginger Hit Man. HE CHUCKLES

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'But to most...

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'I am Puss In Boots!

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'Outlaw.'

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SNORING

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CHAIN CLANKS

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PURRING SNORE

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I will never forget you... Margherita.

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SHE MEOWS

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I mean, Rosa. HE CHUCKLES

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Uh, sorry. I think maybe I should go.

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MAN SNORING

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Hmm.

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SNORING CONTINUES

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FLOORBOARD CREAKS

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HE SHOUTS

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SHOUTS AND GRUNTING

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HE CHUCKLES

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HE YOWLS

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Oh! Ow! Ooh!

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You cannot run for ever,

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Puss In Boots!

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HE PANTS

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SHE SIGHS

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'What can I say? I was a bad kitty.

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'Just a fugitive from the law.

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'For ever running.

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'Searching for a way to clear my name.

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'And I would get that chance

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'on this one fateful night.'

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FIREWORKS WHISTLE, EXPLODE

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Ah-ha-ha-ha-how!

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FESTIVE LATIN MUSIC PLAYS

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CHEERING

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CLUCKING

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CHEERING

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MEN CHATTER

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DERISIVE LAUGHTER

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-Here, kitty, kitty!

-HE LAUGHS

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Raoul. Look what the cat dragged in.

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Oh, wait... That is the cat!

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LAUGHTER PUSS GROWLS

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HE GRUNTS

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One leche, please.

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What are you doing here, senor? Did you lose your ball of yarn?

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LAUGHTER

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HE CHUCKLES So funny.

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One leche coming up.

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HE GRUNTS

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THEY CACKLE

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I am not looking for trouble.

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I am but a humble gato in search of his next meal.

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Perhaps you gentlemen can help me find a simple score?

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The only thing you'll find tonight is trouble, Puss In Boots.

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FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

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Well, perhaps if one of us were to tell the law

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that you are in town, we could split the reward.

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MEN SHRIEK

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HE TUTS

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You made the cat angry.

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You do not want to make the cat angry!

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-HE CLEARS THROAT

-The Church of St Michael has just

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put up a golden statue of the Virgin of Guadalupe.

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I do not steal from churches.

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The boys' orphanage has been donated silver candlesticks.

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They would look very lovely in your home.

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I do not steal from orphans.

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Uh, what about Jack and Jill?

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-Sh! Are you crazy?

-The what?

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The murderous outlaws Jack and Jill have gotten their hands on...

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magic beans.

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Do not joke with me about magic beans!

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I searched half my life for them. They do not exist.

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No, cat. We have seen them.

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These...are the beans of legend.

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Huh? Whoa.

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Grows a vine to the Land of Giants,

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and the Golden Goose.

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The Golden Goose...

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A heist like this could set you up for life.

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All nine of them.

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Show him the golden eggs.

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No!

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Please, you have shown enough.

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Only a cat with a death wish would steal the beans from Jack and Jill.

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The only wish I have is to repay an old debt.

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And this is my chance.

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Now...

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..where do I find this Jack and Jill?

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SQUEALING

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HE SWALLOWS

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HE PLAYS SLOW BALLAD

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-LOW RUMBLING

-Huh?

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HE GASPS

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GASPING DOG YELPS

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I'm sorry...we have no rooms.

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MAN GROANS THUD!

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Well, I think one just opened up.

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MAN WHIMPERS

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We'd like a complimentary continental breakfast.

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And don't even think about skimpin' on them baby muffins.

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DOOR LOCKS

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-WHIMPERING:

-We don't have any baby muffins.

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HE SOBS BALLAD RESUMES

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You know, Jill...

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I been thinking.

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-SHE SIGHS

-Get it out.

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I, um... Once we're done with this magic bean business

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and got ourselves all them beautiful golden eggs...

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Mm-hm, go on.

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..that we cut down on some of the hijacking and murdering.

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I mean, it's fun and all, but, uh...

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..I want a baby.

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BARKING

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FIREWORKS CRACKLE DISTANT CHEERING

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A baby what, Jack?

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A baby us, Jill.

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We'll raise it wild, like a squirrel or something.

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Holy frijoles!

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They do exist.

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-SHE GROANS

-Ever since you fell down that hill

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and broke your crown, you have been talking crazy.

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CLAWS SQUEAK

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It couldn't hurt to have an extra shooter during ambushes.

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Maybe I cut too deep... cut that brain out of your head.

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Hey! What gives?

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IT HISSES

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If it's to be a girl, she'll have your strong...

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No! No! No!

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You, you, you! You stop where you are!

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I don't know, Jack.

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How do I ride and shoot with a baby slung on my back?

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They got them backpacks now. The way I see it, Jill...

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Those beans are mine!

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...we fall off this flat earth one time.

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What better proof of our love...

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Me? JACK CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY

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You snap ME?

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IMITATES SNAP

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YOU snap ME?!

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HE GROWLS

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IT GROWLS

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THEY HISS

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HE YOWLS

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You looking for something?

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THEY CACKLE

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Uh, no. HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

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No hablo ingles.

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Whoa, whoa!

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You are going to pay for this!

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SCREAMING JACK CHUCKLES

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HE GRUNTS, GROWLS

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SHOUTING

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BLOWS RASPBERRY Huh?!

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Oh!

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HE GASPS

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No!

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HE SIGHS

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Oh!

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-SHE GASPS

-Chupacabra!

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-PUSS YOWLS

-Chupacabra! Chupacabra!

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-Chupacabra!

-You are a crazy woman!

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HE GRUNTS

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Ha! THEY GASP

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HE PURRS SHE GIGGLES

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Ha-ha!

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Ow!

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HE GROWLS

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CATS YOWL GLASS SHATTERS

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HE HOWLS

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ROMANTIC LATIN MUSIC PLAYS

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MEWING MUSIC STOPS

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PURRING

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CAT CLEARS THROAT

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Those magic beans were my score!

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You just cost me a chance at getting the golden eggs, mi amigo.

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Put up your dukes.

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RHYTHMIC RATTLING

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CATS MEOW

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PERCUSSIVE BEAT BEGINS

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LOW GROWLING

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BEAT CONTINUES

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RHYTHMIC CLANKING

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CATS CHATTER

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BEAT STOPS

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BEAT RESUMES

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Ha!

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Ha!

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-Yah!

-CATS CHEER

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Psst!

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Very well.

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If it is to be a dance fight,

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then I will Tuesday-Night-Dance-Fight you

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to the death!

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IT PLAYS DRAMATIC RIFF

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FLAMENCO MUSIC PLAYS

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Ha!

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Ha! CATS CHEER

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IT YOWLS HE GASPS

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How dare you do the Litter Box at me!

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Hello!

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HE CHUCKLES

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Toot-toot!

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Ha!

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Ha-ha! Hmmph!

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# Hey-aa! #

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Can you feel me?

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IT YOWLS

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HE GRUNTS MUSIC QUICKENS

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Ha-ha!

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ALL GASP

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Yah!

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IT SNARLS HE GRUNTS

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HE GRUNTS

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CATS CHEER

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THUNDER CRASHES

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HE GROWLS

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HE YOWLS

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Fear me...if you dare.

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HE GASPS

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Ha!

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HE CHUCKLES

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IT CHUCKLES

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GUITAR TWANGS IT GROANS

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CROWD GASPS

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You hit me in the head with a guitar?!

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STAMMERING: You are a woman?

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Oh!

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Whoa.

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Amateur.

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Wow! CATS MEOW

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Senorita, wait!

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Let me buy you some leche! I am a lover, not a...fighter.

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Hello?

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You are hiding from me?

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I like to play the games, too.

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I sense in you a kindred spirit, a...

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HE SNIFFS

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Hmm.

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I smell something familiar.

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HE SNIFFS DEEPLY

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Something...dangerous.

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Something...

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breakfasty.

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It's been a long time, brother.

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Maldito huevo.

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Ha!

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Humpty Alexander Dumpty.

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How dare you show your face to me.

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-HE SIGHS

-I know you're angry.

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You have every right.

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But it is good to see you, Puss.

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-PUSS GROWLS

-Are those new boots?

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No! They are the same boots I wore when you betrayed me.

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B-Betrayed you?

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You left me cracked in pieces on a bridge,

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surrounded by soldiers!

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They wrote a song about it!

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And how did we get on that bridge in the first place?!

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-Because we were brothers, and brothers are supposed to look after each other...

-Humpty!

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Remember why we're here.

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I should have known.

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I had the magic beans in my grasp,

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and you sent this very...attractive devil woman to interfere.

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You are a curse on my life!

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Whoa, whoa, wait. Hear me out. OK?

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Yes, yes, I sent Kitty to bring you here.

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But she is no ordinary thief.

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She's Kitty Softpaws.

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The softest touch in Spain.

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That's a lot of heel for a guy, don't you think?

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HE SIGHS

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Look, with Kitty's skill, your sword and my brain,

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we've got a fighting chance here.

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Puss, come on, you of all people know that nobody's ever ripped off

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the giant's castle and lived to tell the tale.

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You want to survive? You need a plan.

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And I've studied this job my whole life.

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You know that.

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Let's be honest.

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Without me, you don't even know where to plant the beans, Puss.

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But Jack and Jill do. They're on their way.

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We go up the beanstalk outlaws

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and we come down legends.

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So what do you say?

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Partners?

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No.

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Never again.

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I'm sorry, OK? How long are you going to hold a grudge?

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It's been seven years!

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That's, like, 35 cat years.

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You need me!

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And I-I-I need you.

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MAN SINGS BALLAD

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Puss! You got any idea what they do to eggs in San Ricardo prison?

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BALLAD STOPS

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I'll tell you this, my friend.

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It ain't over easy.

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Oh!

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Adios...Humpty Dumpty.

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BALLAD RESUMES

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Oh, this is bad. This is bad.

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Don't worry, I'll take care of it.

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I know how to speak "meow".

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..sad story with your twisted lies.

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Your greasy shell that smells like old ham!

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I should crack you open for a... HE GASPS

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GROWLS PLAYFULLY

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GRUNTS

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-KITTY CHUCKLES

-Look what I've found.

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-SING-SONGY:

-Someone forgot his money.

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COINS RATTLE

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Oh, you are dangerous...!

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SHE CHUCKLES

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Well, Humpty says you LIKE danger.

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Just think of all the trouble we can get into.

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The two of us together.

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We can steal a LOT of golden eggs.

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Hmm?

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GROANS

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And...you owe me.

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I owe you?

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Mm-hm.

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You hit me in the head with a guitar.

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I regret the guitar.

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OK, I forgive you.

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So...you're in?

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CHUCKLING

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There is one teeny,

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tiny,

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itty-bitty problem.

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And what is that?

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You work for the EGG!

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Oh, come on, Puss.

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What happened between you and Humpty that was so bad?

0:19:540:19:58

I am afraid with me and Humpty...

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the scars are too deep.

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HE SIGHS

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It all started a long time ago.

0:20:100:20:13

Oh, no, no, you don't have to tell me your whole life story, please.

0:20:130:20:16

-You may want to sit.

-Urh!

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It is at times quite...

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painful.

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OK, here we go.

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'It was a year in which the rain had not fallen.

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'The wind was big and the basket was small.

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'For days, I bounced along...

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'a hungry little kitten with no milk,

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'no mama,

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'and no litterbox.

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'Until I came to rest at a home for lost children.'

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MEWS

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Ohh...!

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CLICKS TONGUE

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'Her name was Imelda.

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'And, like a mother,

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'she took me into her heart

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'and raised me as her own.'

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KIDS SHOUTING AND BANGING

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Silencio.

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Silencio.

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'She was an angel of kindness.'

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-SILENCIO!

-SHOUTING AND BANGING STOPS

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'Most of the time.'

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I'd like to introduce a new boy joining us.

0:21:130:21:16

It's OK, pequeno. You show with the face.

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Go on.

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MEWS

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'And that was the moment I met...

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Humpty Alexander Dumpty.

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Hey, Whiskers!

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You're sitting in Little Boy Blue's chair.

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-SQUEAKS

-Oh, come on. Is this necessary?

0:21:400:21:42

Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?

0:21:420:21:45

Who asked you, Breakfast?

0:21:450:21:46

Remember what Imelda says, Boy Blue.

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If you're going to blow your top, you blow your horn instead, right?

0:21:480:21:51

-Let's spin him.

-SHRIEKS

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Please don't spin me. Do not spin me!

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Not again! No! I'm gonna yolk!

0:21:550:21:57

'Even though he took my beans, the egg stood up for me,

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'and I decided then... GRUNTS

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'that I would always have his back.

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Mee-yah!

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HISSES

0:22:080:22:10

Wow!

0:22:120:22:14

That was very impressive. Thanks!

0:22:140:22:16

-HORN BLOWING

-Hey, egg boy!

0:22:160:22:18

GIRL CLUCKS

0:22:180:22:20

'There was something about this strange little egg

0:22:200:22:23

that, er, intrigued me.

0:22:230:22:25

SHRIEKS

0:22:400:22:41

Oh, it's you.

0:22:410:22:43

I've been collecting for months now.

0:22:430:22:45

You never know when you're gonna get lucky. You know what I mean?

0:22:450:22:49

-WHISPERING:

-Magic beans. Is what they are.

0:22:490:22:51

Hello? You going to tell all the other kids

0:22:530:22:55

that I believe in magic now? Is that what you're going to do?

0:22:550:22:58

No? What's your name?

0:23:000:23:02

MEWS

0:23:020:23:04

You don't say much, do you?

0:23:040:23:05

I think I'll call you Sparky.

0:23:050:23:08

Whiskers?

0:23:080:23:10

Zoltar!

0:23:100:23:12

How about Puss?

0:23:130:23:14

'Humpty's mind was full of imagination and invention.'

0:23:160:23:20

What is that...50 feet down there?

0:23:200:23:21

Here we go.

0:23:210:23:23

Give me a...PUUUUSS!

0:23:230:23:26

GASPS

0:23:260:23:27

Look at me, Puss! I-I-I'm flying!

0:23:270:23:30

LAUGHS

0:23:300:23:31

BREAKING BRANCHES

0:23:310:23:32

'He spoke of legends and adventures beyond my wildest dreams.'

0:23:320:23:37

Oh, when I find those magic beans, they'll grow a vine

0:23:370:23:40

straight up into the clouds,

0:23:400:23:42

where a terrible and a fearsome giant

0:23:420:23:44

hoards his greatest treasure...

0:23:440:23:47

the Golden Goose.

0:23:470:23:49

Oh, the Golden Goose. Just one.

0:23:490:23:51

Just one of her golden eggs...

0:23:510:23:54

could set me for life.

0:23:540:23:56

It's my destiny, Puss.

0:23:560:23:59

I can't really explain it,

0:23:590:24:01

but I just feel like I belong up there.

0:24:010:24:04

HUMPTY SIGHS

0:24:040:24:05

PUSS SIGHS

0:24:050:24:07

Well... This is awkward.

0:24:080:24:10

This is kind of a solo dream here.

0:24:100:24:14

I don't need any dead weight, you know, holding me down.

0:24:140:24:17

PURRING

0:24:170:24:19

What are you doing?

0:24:190:24:20

Oh, man, that's good.

0:24:200:24:22

The eye thing that you're doing, that is really splendid.

0:24:220:24:26

OK, let me just think for a second. All right... OK.

0:24:260:24:29

Uh... This is crazy, but...

0:24:290:24:32

I am considering a partnership.

0:24:320:24:35

I just need to know one thing.

0:24:370:24:39

Can you commit?

0:24:390:24:41

Si. I can commit.

0:24:410:24:43

Oh, you can talk!

0:24:430:24:45

Could you help me up?

0:24:450:24:46

GRUNTING

0:24:460:24:49

OK...

0:24:490:24:50

First rule of Bean Club?

0:24:510:24:53

You do not talk about Bean Club.

0:24:540:24:57

Second rule of Bean Club...

0:24:570:24:59

..is you don't talk about Bean Club.

0:24:590:25:02

-You ready?

-Ready.

0:25:020:25:05

From this day forth, it shall be known...

0:25:050:25:07

Never alone,

0:25:070:25:09

always together...

0:25:090:25:11

Humpty and Puss...

0:25:110:25:13

-BOTH:

-Brothers for ever.

0:25:130:25:15

And from that moment on,

0:25:150:25:16

we were united on a great adventure

0:25:160:25:19

to find the magic beans.

0:25:190:25:21

Help me up.

0:25:210:25:23

-Egg me.

-'Humpty was the brains...

0:25:230:25:25

SCREAMS

0:25:250:25:27

-Good gracious!

-I never saw him!

0:25:270:25:28

That really hurt!

0:25:280:25:30

'..and I was the skill.'

0:25:300:25:31

I'm cracked!

0:25:310:25:33

Well, we got red beans, green beans,

0:25:350:25:37

coffee beans, lima beans...

0:25:370:25:38

but no magic beans.

0:25:380:25:40

-Would you care for a jelly bean?

-Oh, thank you.

0:25:410:25:45

'Finding them meant everything to us.'

0:25:450:25:48

Oh, I almost forgot the most important thing...

0:25:480:25:51

That's me and you, Puss.

0:25:510:25:52

Me and you.

0:25:540:25:55

'But we never did find them.

0:25:550:25:58

'And, as the years passed,

0:25:580:25:59

'the quest for magic beans

0:25:590:26:01

'seemed more and more

0:26:010:26:03

'like the dreams of a child.'

0:26:030:26:05

Aw!

0:26:050:26:06

'As teenagers, Humpty and I looked for trouble...

0:26:060:26:11

'and often found it.

0:26:110:26:12

Third time this month, Imelda.

0:26:120:26:14

Next time is jail time.

0:26:140:26:17

They're just kids.

0:26:170:26:19

They are thieves.

0:26:190:26:21

IMELDA CLEARS THROAT

0:26:210:26:23

You are better than this.

0:26:250:26:28

I believe in you with all my heart.

0:26:280:26:31

Please do not let me down.

0:26:310:26:35

I hate this place.

0:26:350:26:37

I cannot wait for us to get out of here.

0:26:370:26:39

Throw a rock. It'll make you feel better.

0:26:410:26:43

BELLOWS CROWD GASPS

0:26:430:26:45

Oh, boy. We should go.

0:26:450:26:47

'On instinct, I reacted.'

0:26:490:26:51

Hah!

0:26:510:26:53

GRUNTS

0:26:530:26:54

BULL SNORTS Aah!

0:26:540:26:56

BELLOWS IN SLOW MOTION

0:26:570:27:00

He saved the Comandante's mother!

0:27:040:27:06

He saved the Comandante's mother!

0:27:060:27:08

MOOS

0:27:080:27:11

You saved my mother.

0:27:130:27:16

Senor Puss...? He is a hero!

0:27:160:27:19

CHEERING

0:27:190:27:21

Today we see that courage and bravery

0:27:210:27:26

come in all sizes!

0:27:260:27:28

'Little did I know that one moment would change my whole life.

0:27:280:27:32

These are for you, my boy.

0:27:320:27:35

Wear them as a symbol of honour...

0:27:350:27:37

and justice.

0:27:370:27:39

I will make you proud, Mama.

0:27:390:27:43

You already have, my Puss In Boots.

0:27:440:27:48

'How strange it was to give a cat boots...

0:27:500:27:53

'But, whoa...! I looked good!

0:27:530:27:57

'And as the light of my path grew brighter...

0:27:570:27:59

Hah!

0:27:590:28:00

'..Humpty's road grew ever darker.'

0:28:000:28:04

FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

0:28:050:28:07

Gracias, Comandante.

0:28:100:28:12

Be careful of the company you keep.

0:28:120:28:15

HE SPITS

0:28:150:28:16

I know! I know, I never should've tried something without you.

0:28:160:28:19

You're not stealing lollipops any more, Humpty.

0:28:190:28:21

This is getting serious.

0:28:210:28:23

You're right! We have to be smarter about this.

0:28:230:28:25

Here, look. We need to think bigger.

0:28:250:28:27

I've been casing the silversmith and it's perfect.

0:28:270:28:30

You and me, in and out, 50 seconds tops.

0:28:300:28:33

Will you put that away! This is our home.

0:28:330:28:35

These people have done nothing to us.

0:28:350:28:38

OUR home?

0:28:380:28:39

OK, yeah, I get it now.

0:28:390:28:42

You get some fancy boots and now you're too good for me?

0:28:420:28:45

That is not true.

0:28:450:28:47

We weren't born here. We're orphans!

0:28:470:28:49

All we got is each other, you understand?

0:28:490:28:51

We are better than this.

0:28:510:28:52

But we're partners.

0:28:530:28:55

We are brothers.

0:28:550:28:57

But I am not stealing any more.

0:28:580:29:00

'But Humpty would not give up so easily.'

0:29:030:29:05

-YOWLS

-I'm in trouble, Puss!

0:29:050:29:07

It's Boy Blue and his gang. I owe them some money.

0:29:070:29:10

They're coming for me. Just get me over this wall.

0:29:100:29:12

I got to go. Help me up the wall.

0:29:120:29:14

Get me up the wall. Hurry! Hurry!

0:29:140:29:15

DISTANT WHISTLE BLOWING

0:29:240:29:26

OK, I've got everything.

0:29:260:29:27

We did it. Come on, let's go!

0:29:270:29:29

How could you do this to me?!

0:29:290:29:31

I did you a favour! We can finally get out of here!

0:29:310:29:33

This is the money of the people! This is all they have!

0:29:330:29:36

PUSS YOWLS

0:29:360:29:37

HE GROANS

0:29:370:29:39

-HE GASPS

-You disgrace those boots!

0:29:390:29:42

Comandante, please, I can explain!

0:29:420:29:44

Arrest them!

0:29:440:29:45

H'yah!

0:29:450:29:47

HORSE WHINNIES

0:29:470:29:49

Hurry up! Get to the bridge!

0:29:490:29:51

-You tricked me!

-I had to! You left me no choice!

0:29:510:29:55

HORSE WHINNIES

0:29:550:29:56

MEN SHOUTING

0:29:580:29:59

'Mama...

0:30:030:30:04

Pequeno.

0:30:040:30:06

Oh! Watch out!

0:30:060:30:08

Oh! Oof!

0:30:110:30:13

Oh, no.

0:30:230:30:25

Puss. I-I can't get up.

0:30:250:30:27

Puss! Help me. I can't get up!

0:30:270:30:30

Freeze!

0:30:300:30:31

Puss, save me!

0:30:310:30:33

Save yourself.

0:30:340:30:36

We got you.

0:30:360:30:38

'I lost everything I cared about that day.

0:30:520:30:55

'My brother.

0:30:560:30:58

'My honour.

0:30:580:31:00

'My home.

0:31:000:31:01

'All I thought about was the disappointment in my mama's eyes.

0:31:030:31:07

'And I have been running ever since.

0:31:090:31:11

'The egg betrayed me.

0:31:150:31:18

'His lies cost me everything.'

0:31:180:31:21

SNORING

0:31:210:31:23

Hey!

0:31:230:31:24

I'm aw-w-wake!

0:31:240:31:26

You think I don't want to fix the past?

0:31:260:31:28

I can't get down.

0:31:310:31:33

SHE SIGHS

0:31:330:31:34

SHE GRUNTS

0:31:360:31:38

Listen, a day...a day doesn't go by,

0:31:410:31:45

when I don't think about what I lost.

0:31:450:31:47

I lost my best friend.

0:31:490:31:52

My only friend.

0:31:520:31:54

And I get it now. I got greedy and desperate and I let you down.

0:31:540:31:57

I let myself down.

0:31:570:32:00

All I'm asking for, Puss, is a second chance.

0:32:000:32:02

Give me that second chance

0:32:020:32:04

and I'll help you pay back San Ricardo.

0:32:040:32:07

Please, Puss.

0:32:070:32:09

Let me show you what our friendship meant to me.

0:32:090:32:12

-I will do it.

-Oh, that's great.

0:32:160:32:19

I will do this for my mother and for San Ricardo,

0:32:190:32:22

not for you.

0:32:220:32:24

We are not partners and we are not friends.

0:32:240:32:27

OK. I promise this time,

0:32:290:32:32

I will not let you down.

0:32:320:32:34

-Yes!

-HE LAUGHS

0:32:340:32:37

I think we got our Bean Club back.

0:32:370:32:40

SQUEALING

0:32:480:32:50

Humpty's plan better work.

0:32:580:33:00

Listen, you just need to worry about your part.

0:33:000:33:03

Don't screw it up.

0:33:030:33:05

-What?

-Again with the mask?

0:33:050:33:07

I don't need style advice from Mr Dusty Boots.

0:33:070:33:10

Huh?!

0:33:100:33:11

Come on, Puss. Now!

0:33:180:33:19

BOTH GRUNTING

0:33:220:33:24

Our biological clocks are tickin', darlin'.

0:33:240:33:26

You got to look at the big picture.

0:33:260:33:28

What's your problem? Huh?

0:33:280:33:30

Listen. I put a lot of work into my body.

0:33:300:33:32

I look good and I am NOT just going to throw that away.

0:33:320:33:35

SHE GASPS

0:33:350:33:36

-THEY WHISPER: Hey, hey, hey...!

-What?!

0:33:380:33:40

-< We're gonna start small.

-(Look!)

-Just PRETEND you have a baby.

0:33:400:33:43

PIGS SNORE

0:33:430:33:45

Excellent.

0:33:450:33:46

CHUCKLES

0:33:460:33:48

I don't have time to be at home with no diapers and baby socks.

0:33:500:33:53

You don't have to, Jill. I'll be the stay-at-home dad.

0:33:530:33:56

We got ten hungry piggies, there in the back.

0:33:560:33:58

You can practise on them. Just pull over, feed them.

0:33:580:34:01

-Lil' Hamhock's my favourite.

-(You got to hurry up!)

0:34:010:34:03

- (sh!) - He's a cute little bugger.

0:34:030:34:05

(Why are you not using your claws?)

0:34:050:34:07

Would you please just shut up! I'm on it!

0:34:070:34:09

-(Just use your claws!)

-Be quiet.

0:34:090:34:11

-(Your claws!)

-I don't have any claws, all right?!

0:34:110:34:14

-PIG GRUNTS

-Was that Hamhock?

0:34:140:34:16

KITTY GASPS GRUNTING

0:34:160:34:18

Sh, sh, sh...!

0:34:180:34:19

(There, there...! Sleepy, sleepy, big, fat piggy.)

0:34:220:34:25

SQUEAKS HAPPILY

0:34:250:34:26

Remember when we had to pretend we had that monkey one time...?

0:34:260:34:29

(You babysit.)

0:34:290:34:31

-Soft paws.

-When did we have a monkey? >

0:34:310:34:34

JACK AND JILL CHAT IN BACKGROUND

0:34:340:34:37

Well?

0:34:370:34:39

Hello, beans of legend.

0:34:390:34:41

(Let's go!)

0:34:430:34:44

SQUEALS LOUDLY

0:34:440:34:46

METALLIC CLICKING

0:34:480:34:51

Well, well, well.

0:34:520:34:53

Look what we have here, Jill.

0:34:530:34:56

You messed with our baby!

0:34:560:34:58

GROWLING

0:34:580:35:00

And you took my beans.

0:35:000:35:02

CACKLES

0:35:020:35:03

-SAUSAGE BOMB!

-SQUEALING

0:35:030:35:06

-YOWLING

-Whoa!

0:35:060:35:08

You're going to pay for this! Soul-sucking cats!

0:35:110:35:13

MUFFLED SHOUTING

0:35:130:35:16

Signal the egg!

0:35:160:35:18

-Yes!

-WHIP CRACKS

0:35:180:35:20

-OK...

-Ready.

0:35:240:35:26

Set... GO!

0:35:260:35:28

Ow!

0:35:280:35:30

JILL CACKLING

0:35:300:35:33

GROANS

0:35:330:35:34

PIGS SQUEALING

0:35:400:35:41

GRUNTS

0:35:410:35:43

JILL SNARLING

0:35:430:35:45

HE GASPS

0:35:490:35:51

Whoa!

0:35:510:35:53

GROANS

0:35:550:35:57

GRUNTING

0:35:570:35:58

SIGHS: Ah!

0:35:580:36:00

JILL CHUCKLES

0:36:000:36:01

All right, cat. Give me them beans.

0:36:010:36:04

WHIMPERS

0:36:040:36:06

Is it true a cat always lands on its feet?

0:36:060:36:08

NO! That is just a rumour spread by dogs!

0:36:080:36:12

Well, let's find out.

0:36:120:36:13

H'yah!

0:36:130:36:15

See? I told you I wouldn't let you down!

0:36:210:36:22

-GUN BLAST

-You think this is over? Ha!

0:36:220:36:25

HE GASPS

0:36:280:36:30

HORSE WHINNIES Hey, that was close!

0:36:300:36:32

JILL CACKLES

0:36:320:36:34

H'yah!

0:36:380:36:39

Now!

0:36:420:36:43

We just got to make it to that bridge! Hang on!

0:36:460:36:50

-Humpty! There is no bridge!

-Trust me.

0:36:510:36:54

SQUEALING

0:36:540:36:56

BOTH: Humpty!

0:37:000:37:01

SCREAMING

0:37:020:37:04

BOTH GASP

0:37:040:37:05

We're going to die! HORSE WHINNIES

0:37:060:37:08

SHOUTS ECHOING

0:37:130:37:15

I hate cats.

0:37:200:37:21

This is war!

0:37:210:37:23

CHEERING

0:37:250:37:27

LAUGHTER ECHOING

0:37:270:37:30

LAUGHTER

0:37:300:37:32

Giant's castle...

0:37:320:37:34

Here we come.

0:37:340:37:35

I must hand it to the egg.

0:37:380:37:40

This was a team effort. Humpty still has his claws...

0:37:400:37:43

I mean, flaws.

0:37:430:37:45

That was what I meant, not claws. He's not a cat.

0:37:450:37:47

CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY

0:37:470:37:48

-Not to say there's anything wrong...

-I don't want to talk about it.

0:37:480:37:51

Got it.

0:37:510:37:52

OK, we should be close!

0:37:520:37:55

Keep your eyes out for any strange cloud activity!

0:37:560:37:59

I am called Kitty Softpaws because I'll steal you blind

0:38:000:38:02

and you'll never even know I was there.

0:38:020:38:05

HE GROWLS

0:38:080:38:09

Kitty?

0:38:110:38:12

You are not as good as they say.

0:38:130:38:15

You're better.

0:38:160:38:19

I will respect your privacy.

0:38:220:38:24

OK. I'll tell you.

0:38:270:38:30

I was just a stray...

0:38:320:38:34

but I had beautiful claws.

0:38:340:38:36

One day, a really nice couple took me in.

0:38:370:38:41

Gave me milk every morning.

0:38:410:38:44

Loved me.

0:38:440:38:45

Maybe I scratched their curtains

0:38:470:38:49

or played too rough with the hamster.

0:38:490:38:52

I don't know why they did it.

0:38:520:38:55

But they took my claws.

0:38:550:38:56

Cat people are crazy.

0:38:580:39:00

Stop the coach! I think this is it!

0:39:020:39:04

Ooh! Whoo!

0:39:100:39:14

MUTTERING

0:39:140:39:15

HE PANTS

0:39:210:39:23

Can you believe this, Puss?

0:39:240:39:25

After all these years!

0:39:250:39:27

Here. I want you to plant them.

0:39:290:39:32

That...is a strange cloud.

0:39:380:39:40

Whoa! OK! This is it! It's happening, hurry!

0:39:430:39:46

This way!

0:39:490:39:51

Good, good. Come on, come on, come on.

0:39:510:39:53

23 divided by cloud depth.

0:39:530:39:55

Hole! Right here.

0:39:550:39:57

Now place the beans.

0:40:000:40:01

-HE GASPS

-Place the beans CAREFULLY, please.

0:40:020:40:05

Not on top of each other.

0:40:050:40:07

The magic is very delicate.

0:40:070:40:08

OK, good. Very good.

0:40:080:40:10

Now just stand back.

0:40:100:40:12

WIND HOWLS

0:40:190:40:21

HE GASPS

0:40:210:40:24

THEY GASP

0:40:340:40:35

BOOMING

0:40:360:40:38

WHOOSHING

0:40:410:40:44

Whoa!

0:40:440:40:45

What's happening here?

0:40:540:40:55

Maybe the magic rubbed off in your pocket?

0:40:550:40:57

-That's impossible.

-OK, OK. Let's not panic.

0:40:570:40:59

You know, I read somewhere that plants have feelings.

0:40:590:41:02

So, come on... Say something nice to it.

0:41:020:41:06

OK.

0:41:060:41:07

Let me just think for a second.

0:41:080:41:10

Hi, little plant.

0:41:100:41:12

STALK CREAKS

0:41:140:41:16

Whoa!

0:41:190:41:20

AAAAARRRRHHH!

0:41:240:41:26

AAARGH!

0:41:340:41:35

Yow...!

0:41:370:41:38

Oh!

0:41:380:41:40

HE CHUCKLES

0:41:400:41:42

HE GRUNTS

0:41:450:41:46

THUNDER BOOMS

0:41:470:41:50

HE GASPS

0:42:270:42:29

-HIGH-PITCHED:

-Uh, guys?

0:42:290:42:31

-Whoa...!

-HIGHPITCHED:

-Humpty!

0:42:310:42:33

I do not see him. Do you see him?

0:42:330:42:35

I don't see him anywhere.

0:42:350:42:36

You sound...weird!

0:42:360:42:39

Ah!

0:42:390:42:40

It's the thin air!

0:42:400:42:42

Come on in! It feels great!

0:42:420:42:45

CHEERING

0:42:470:42:50

The cloud, it tickles my nose.

0:42:510:42:54

Hoo-hoo! That's because they effervesce! Who knew?

0:42:540:42:58

Ha-ho!

0:42:580:42:59

SHE CHUCKLES

0:43:010:43:04

Come on.

0:43:040:43:06

PLAYFUL SHOUTING

0:43:060:43:10

Gotcha!

0:43:230:43:25

THEY BOTH LAUGH

0:43:250:43:27

Meow.

0:43:270:43:29

Hey, Puss. What do you think? Do I shave?

0:43:300:43:33

-CHUCKLES

-Let me show you something.

0:43:330:43:35

Somewhere down there, there are two little kids - I don't know -

0:43:420:43:45

maybe orphans, and they're laying on a hill,

0:43:450:43:48

staring at the clouds,

0:43:480:43:50

dreaming about the future.

0:43:500:43:51

That was me and you, Puss.

0:43:520:43:55

Me and you.

0:43:550:43:57

Boys!

0:43:580:44:00

You might want to take a look at this.

0:44:000:44:03

The giant's castle.

0:44:060:44:09

OK, time to suit up.

0:44:110:44:14

Humpty!

0:44:140:44:15

I'll fit right in with the golden eggs.

0:44:150:44:17

Eugh!

0:44:170:44:19

Brilliant or what, huh?

0:44:210:44:23

Humpty, you're not wearing underwear!

0:44:230:44:26

What? Are you embarrassed?

0:44:260:44:29

I'm not.

0:44:290:44:30

HE CHUCKLES

0:44:300:44:32

Puss, remember when everyone was laughing at Bean Club?

0:44:320:44:35

And who is laughing now? Ha-ha! We are!

0:44:350:44:38

Wow!

0:44:480:44:50

CLOUD BUMPS

0:44:520:44:54

-HUMPTY IN NORMAL VOICE:

-That...is our target.

0:45:020:45:05

Hey, you don't sound like an elf any more.

0:45:050:45:07

It's because the air pressure in here is normal. Let's go.

0:45:070:45:10

So here is the plan.

0:45:130:45:15

You two get the golden eggs, I will fight the giant.

0:45:150:45:17

There's no giant to fight. The giant's been dead for years.

0:45:170:45:20

-What?!

-You didn't do the reading, did you?

0:45:200:45:22

Jack And The Beanstalk, Chapter 14, Giant Takes a Big Dirt Nap.

0:45:220:45:26

Ahh! Ankle burn.

0:45:260:45:27

MONSTROUS ROAR

0:45:270:45:29

HE YELPS

0:45:290:45:30

Wha... What was that?

0:45:300:45:32

They call it the Great Terror.

0:45:320:45:33

It's the monster that guards the Golden Goose.

0:45:330:45:36

Legend has it that if you look at it, you'll turn to stone.

0:45:360:45:38

But nobody really knows because nobody's walked away from it alive.

0:45:380:45:42

Follow me and keep quiet.

0:45:420:45:44

HUMPTY'S SUIT SQUEAKS

0:45:440:45:46

HE PANTS AND SUIT SQUEAKS

0:45:510:45:53

Sh, Humpty!

0:45:530:45:55

I can't help it. Everything's rubbing and pinching!

0:45:550:45:58

-I need powder!

-SQUEAKING

0:45:580:46:00

THEY GASP

0:46:030:46:04

DISTANT SHATTERING MONSTROUS ROAR

0:46:070:46:09

HUMPTY SHRIEKS

0:46:090:46:11

THUDDING FOOTSTEPS

0:46:130:46:15

How are we going to get across?

0:46:150:46:16

Champagne.

0:46:160:46:18

Cheers!

0:46:220:46:23

THEY SCREAM

0:46:260:46:28

ROARING

0:46:300:46:33

Do not worry. I will protect you.

0:46:350:46:37

DEEP RUMBLING

0:46:370:46:39

What are you going to do? Hit it in the head with a guitar?

0:46:390:46:42

Please. Stop bringing up the guitar.

0:46:420:46:45

HE WHIMPERS

0:46:530:46:55

HE SHRIEKS

0:46:570:46:59

WHIMPERING

0:47:010:47:03

Catch me!

0:47:030:47:05

ROARING

0:47:050:47:07

Hurry! Hide!

0:47:070:47:09

Don't look at it!

0:47:120:47:14

BELLOWING BREATHS

0:47:140:47:15

HUMPTY PANTS AND JABBERS

0:47:150:47:17

Sh, Humpty, be quiet!

0:47:170:47:20

-I'm hyperventilating!

-MUFFLED:

-I said I couldn't breathe

0:47:200:47:22

-and then you zipped the thing over my mouth!

-Sh! Hey.

0:47:220:47:25

-You got to get it together. Come on!

-OK.

0:47:250:47:28

HUMPTY GRUNTS

0:47:330:47:35

HE SIGHS

0:47:360:47:37

THEY GASP

0:47:400:47:42

Look at this!

0:47:440:47:45

It's egg paradise.

0:47:450:47:47

It's so beautiful, I feel like I belong here.

0:47:480:47:51

HE LAUGHS

0:47:510:47:52

Whoo!

0:47:540:47:55

GROANS

0:47:550:47:57

Golden eggs. Oh!

0:47:570:47:59

Grab as many as you can.

0:48:000:48:02

GRUNTING

0:48:020:48:03

I thought they were going to be like chicken size.

0:48:030:48:06

Can you imagine laying one of these? Ouch...!

0:48:060:48:10

Puss! >

0:48:100:48:12

Ow...!

0:48:120:48:13

Oof!

0:48:130:48:15

How are we supposed to get these out of here?

0:48:150:48:17

-I don't know.

-Sh!

0:48:170:48:19

QUACKING GASPS

0:48:190:48:21

Oh, my...!

0:48:210:48:22

PEEPS

0:48:240:48:26

The Golden Goose.

0:48:260:48:27

Just look at her. Isn't she beautiful?

0:48:290:48:32

Quack!

0:48:320:48:34

QUACKS SOFTLY

0:48:340:48:36

PEEPS, COOS HUMPTY SIGHS

0:48:370:48:39

COOING

0:48:390:48:41

Ohhhh...!

0:48:410:48:42

Oh... My sweet darling.

0:48:420:48:44

HUMPTY GIGGLES

0:48:440:48:46

I think she likes you.

0:48:460:48:48

MONSTROUS ROAR

0:48:480:48:51

-WHISPERING:

-Let's just take her.

0:48:510:48:52

Wait a minute. This is the goose of legend.

0:48:520:48:54

We don't know what happens if we take her. ROARING

0:48:540:48:57

I know what happens if we don't take her - we got nothing.

0:48:570:49:00

Guys, guys, guys... It's a gold pooper.

0:49:000:49:03

We're taking it!

0:49:030:49:04

CHEEPING

0:49:040:49:06

THUDDING STEPS

0:49:080:49:11

Almost there!

0:49:130:49:16

Hang on!

0:49:170:49:19

SCREAMING

0:49:190:49:22

Ow!

0:49:310:49:33

HUMPTY SHRIEKING

0:49:330:49:34

Whoa!

0:49:340:49:36

THEY GROAN

0:49:360:49:37

MONSTROUS ROAR

0:49:370:49:40

HUGE THUDDING STEPS

0:49:410:49:44

It's coming!

0:49:450:49:47

Run!

0:49:470:49:48

SHRIEKING

0:49:550:49:56

SHE GASPS

0:49:580:50:00

SHE GRUNTS AND GROANS

0:50:010:50:03

Kitty!

0:50:030:50:05

What are you doing?

0:50:070:50:08

Aaaargh!

0:50:080:50:12

CHEEPING AND SHOUTING

0:50:170:50:20

HE GASPS AND PANTS

0:50:240:50:26

HE GASPS

0:50:270:50:29

-Whoa! Hang on!

-Whoa!

0:50:300:50:32

Come here, you.

0:50:350:50:37

Got you!

0:50:410:50:42

She's mine now!

0:50:420:50:45

MONSTROUS ROAR

0:50:450:50:48

THEY SCREAM

0:50:490:50:51

Hello!

0:50:540:50:56

Ah!

0:50:560:50:58

Oh, no! Fly, little gosling, fly!

0:51:010:51:04

DISTANT SCREAM

0:51:040:51:08

No! It's not supposed to be this way!

0:51:080:51:11

-Puss?

-No.

0:51:130:51:15

HUMPTY SIGHS

0:51:160:51:18

PUSS LAUGHS Oof!

0:51:180:51:20

HUMPTY SCREAMING

0:51:200:51:23

Uh... I'm sorry. HE CHUCKLES

0:51:230:51:24

Hmm.

0:51:240:51:27

THEY ALL LAUGH

0:51:320:51:34

Thanks, Ginger.

0:51:380:51:41

PEEPS SOFTLY

0:51:440:51:47

Um, we should maybe cut that down.

0:51:470:51:50

DISTANT SQUEALING

0:51:500:51:52

Look at that. You finally got that family you wanted, Jack.

0:51:530:51:57

-Did you hear that?

-PIGLET GRUNTS

0:51:570:51:59

-I think he just called me Daddy.

-Oh!

0:51:590:52:01

-He looks just like you, Jack.

-Thank you.

0:52:010:52:04

SQUEALING

0:52:070:52:10

-Well, what is it?

-BOAR SQUEALS

0:52:140:52:17

RUMBLING

0:52:170:52:19

Huh?

0:52:190:52:20

BOARS SQUEAL

0:52:220:52:24

-I do believe that's our cue.

-BOAR SQUEALS

0:52:260:52:29

Hah!

0:52:290:52:31

PUSS AND HUMPTY: To paying back San Ricardo!

0:52:340:52:36

To being rich!

0:52:360:52:37

Ole!

0:52:370:52:39

FLAMENCO MUSIC PLAYS

0:52:390:52:42

RHYTHMIC CLANKING LAUGHING

0:52:450:52:49

Ha! Ha!

0:52:490:52:51

HE CHUCKLES

0:52:510:52:53

-You.

-Me?

0:52:530:52:55

Yeah, yeah, baby!

0:52:550:52:57

HE GRUNTS

0:52:570:52:58

One, two, cha-cha-cha!

0:52:590:53:01

Three, four, cha-cha-cha! One, two...

0:53:010:53:03

-PEEPS

-What?!

0:53:030:53:05

There is one word for you, Kitty Softpaws - me-wow!

0:53:060:53:10

I know you have quite a reputation with the ladies,

0:53:100:53:13

Mr Friskie Two-Times.

0:53:130:53:15

I've also been known as the... Furry Lover!

0:53:150:53:18

Umphh...!

0:53:180:53:20

But that was before I met you.

0:53:200:53:22

You don't know me, Puss.

0:53:220:53:24

I'm not who you think I am.

0:53:240:53:26

I'm all about the score.

0:53:260:53:27

Come on...!

0:53:270:53:29

Look me in the eyes and tell me all you care about is the gold.

0:53:290:53:32

Puss... Kitty...

0:53:340:53:36

-Peep! Peep! Peep!

-Oh, my God!

0:53:360:53:38

BOTH HISSING HUMPTY LAUGHS

0:53:380:53:40

New partners!

0:53:400:53:42

(Do not fall for his animal magnetism!)

0:53:420:53:44

Stay focused!

0:53:440:53:47

-Ah!

-What?!

0:53:470:53:48

KITTY GIGGLES

0:53:480:53:50

RHYTHMIC CLANKING

0:53:510:53:53

CLEARS THROAT: So... I have been thinking, Miss Softpaws,

0:53:550:53:59

that when we go our separate ways, we can go our separate ways...

0:53:590:54:03

..together.

0:54:030:54:04

Puss, you have to go, now.

0:54:060:54:08

You do not have to push me away any more.

0:54:080:54:11

-You can trust me.

-But...

0:54:110:54:13

Give it up for the legends of San Ricardo,

0:54:130:54:15

Humpty and Puss! We did it!

0:54:150:54:17

THEY LAUGH

0:54:170:54:19

I'm calling it a night, guys.

0:54:190:54:21

Kitty! Stay up with us.

0:54:210:54:23

-No, I feel a...

-SHE COUGHS

0:54:230:54:25

..hairball coming on.

0:54:250:54:27

OK, yeah. Have fun with that!

0:54:270:54:30

We should give her some privacy.

0:54:300:54:32

I never thought we would get to here.

0:54:340:54:37

After all we went through...

0:54:380:54:40

to pull this off, together.

0:54:400:54:43

It is good to have my brother back.

0:54:450:54:47

Yep.

0:54:470:54:49

Sure is.

0:54:490:54:51

Well, we have a big day tomorrow.

0:54:510:54:53

Pretty exciting stuff.

0:54:530:54:56

We should get some rest.

0:54:570:54:59

CLOTH SQUEAKS Good night, Humpty.

0:54:590:55:02

QUACKING, COOING

0:55:020:55:04

Canasta!

0:55:070:55:08

CAWING

0:55:150:55:18

HE GROANS

0:55:320:55:34

SQUAWKING

0:55:360:55:38

AAAARRGH! I am still alive!

0:55:380:55:41

CAWING

0:55:410:55:43

HE GASPS

0:55:430:55:45

Jack and Jill...!

0:55:460:55:48

Kitty?

0:55:490:55:51

Humpty?

0:55:510:55:52

I WILL find you.

0:55:540:55:56

CAWS

0:55:560:55:58

Get out of here! SQUAWKING

0:56:000:56:03

HORSE WHINNIES

0:56:150:56:18

HORSE NICKERS QUIETLY

0:56:310:56:33

HE SIGHS

0:56:380:56:39

GRUNTING

0:56:420:56:43

Huh?

0:56:460:56:48

HE GRUNTS

0:56:500:56:52

Be gone!

0:56:540:56:55

What do you want? Gold? I have gold!

0:56:570:57:00

-Jack, egg's trying to bribe us.

-CHUCKLING

0:57:000:57:03

-With our own gold!

-Come on, all we want is a little breakfast.

0:57:030:57:07

-No, no, please!

-How do you like your eggs, pumpkin?

0:57:070:57:10

Humpty, no!

0:57:100:57:11

HUMPTY SCREAMS

0:57:110:57:14

HE CACKLES

0:57:140:57:16

HE SIGHS

0:57:160:57:17

Hello, Puss.

0:57:170:57:19

ALL: Surprise!

0:57:190:57:21

THEY LAUGH

0:57:210:57:23

What is going on?

0:57:230:57:25

It's a surprise party, and the surprise is on you.

0:57:250:57:29

Looks like the cat's out of the bag.

0:57:290:57:31

You were in cahoots?!

0:57:310:57:33

Oh, yeah! They all work for me.

0:57:330:57:35

I spent a lot of time in prison preparing for this.

0:57:380:57:42

-You set me up.

-Oh, yeah, I set you up. Of course.

0:57:420:57:45

You think this was all about getting the gold and clearing your name?

0:57:450:57:50

This little adventure was about one thing.

0:57:500:57:54

Revenge.

0:57:550:57:56

You never knew it, Puss... but I was always there...

0:57:570:58:00

-there...there...there...

-ECHOING

0:58:000:58:03

You wanted to repay an old debt, Puss?

0:58:220:58:24

Well, so did I.

0:58:240:58:26

Why would you do this?

0:58:260:58:27

You left me on that bridge!

0:58:270:58:29

You abandoned me when I needed you the most.

0:58:290:58:31

-What happened to "brothers for ever"?

-I trusted you!

0:58:310:58:34

Well, now you're finally going to know what it feels like,

0:58:340:58:36

you know, to trust someone and have them stab you in the back.

0:58:360:58:39

GUARDS!

0:58:390:58:41

Puss In Boots, you're under arrest

0:58:410:58:43

for the robbery of the San Ricardo Bank!

0:58:430:58:45

Consider this the final meeting of Bean Club.

0:58:450:58:47

I should scramble you with onions!

0:58:470:58:49

-HE SHRIEKS

-You should never have come back.

0:58:490:58:52

HE GROWLS

0:58:540:58:55

-IMELDA:

-Pequeno! Wait.

0:58:550:58:57

Do not fight them, please.

0:58:570:58:59

Mama! Listen to me. I can explain.

0:58:590:59:02

No. Puss.

0:59:020:59:04

No more running.

0:59:040:59:06

Please stop breaking my heart

0:59:060:59:08

and face what you have done.

0:59:080:59:10

I'm sorry, Mama.

0:59:130:59:15

I let you down.

0:59:160:59:18

Paws where we can see them!

0:59:200:59:22

Turn around... Slow.

0:59:230:59:25

Slower!

0:59:270:59:29

Step into the carrier. Quiet-like.

0:59:340:59:38

Attention! Attention, everyone!

0:59:450:59:47

If you could just come in a little closer.

0:59:470:59:50

Ladies and gentlemen,

0:59:500:59:51

I present to you... the Golden Goose of legend!

0:59:510:59:55

PEEPING CROWD GASP AND CHATTER

0:59:550:59:57

Kitty. Not you, too?

0:59:591:00:02

HUMPTY LAUGHS

1:00:071:00:08

Gold for everyone! Boo! Boo! Boo!

1:00:081:00:10

HE CACKLES

1:00:101:00:12

We got some fresh, hot gold here, people!

1:00:121:00:14

Step right up! Get it hot!

1:00:141:00:18

CROWD CHANT: Huevos! Huevos! Huevos!

1:00:191:00:24

One hat.

1:00:281:00:30

One belt.

1:00:301:00:32

And two boots...

1:00:321:00:35

once a symbol of honour.

1:00:351:00:37

One bottle of catnip?

1:00:391:00:41

Uh... It is for my glaucoma.

1:00:411:00:44

HE YOWLS DOOR SLAMS

1:00:441:00:48

This is where you belong, outlaw.

1:00:481:00:51

And this is where you will stay...

1:00:511:00:54

for ever.

1:00:541:00:55

HE SIGHS

1:01:011:01:03

Whoo-hoo!

1:01:091:01:11

Aargh!

1:01:111:01:12

No, no. Don't stop on my account.

1:01:121:01:15

Well, it looks like the egg got what he wanted.

1:01:261:01:31

You're talking about Humpty?

1:01:311:01:33

Ah-ah-ah! Don't say his name!

1:01:331:01:34

I used to share this cell with that smelly thing.

1:01:341:01:38

Happiest day of my life was when he left.

1:01:381:01:41

Till I realised he stole my magic beans.

1:01:411:01:44

Wait, wait, wait! You had the beans? Who are you?

1:01:441:01:47

HE SNORES

1:01:471:01:48

Hey! What's your name?

1:01:481:01:50

Andy Beanstalk!

1:01:501:01:52

My friends call me Jack.

1:01:521:01:54

I traded the family cow for them beans.

1:01:541:01:58

Course'n, it wasn't my family's cow.

1:01:581:01:59

It was some other family's family cow.

1:01:591:02:02

That's why I got eight to ten. Always know which cow's yourszzz...

1:02:021:02:05

HE SNORES

1:02:051:02:07

Crazy man... WAKE UP!

1:02:071:02:09

HE GASPS

1:02:091:02:11

What else do you know?

1:02:111:02:12

We're all goners, thanks to that little stinky!

1:02:121:02:15

I told him not to take the goose,

1:02:151:02:17

but all he wanted was his revenge!

1:02:171:02:19

Don't take the goose. Why?

1:02:211:02:23

HE SNORES Huh!

1:02:231:02:25

The Great Terror!

1:02:251:02:27

That's the Golden Goose's mama.

1:02:271:02:30

Oh, no.

1:02:301:02:31

And she will be out for blood

1:02:311:02:34

when she comes back for her baby.

1:02:341:02:38

GUARD!

1:02:381:02:39

San Ricardo is in terrible danger! You must listen to me!

1:02:391:02:42

Quiet, you!

1:02:421:02:44

PUSS YOWLS

1:02:551:02:57

YOWLING CONTINUES

1:03:021:03:05

(Shut up!)

1:03:051:03:08

YOWLING

1:03:091:03:11

HE GROANS ANGRILY

1:03:111:03:13

Sh!

1:03:151:03:16

HE MEWS

1:03:171:03:19

HE PURRS GUARD GASPS

1:03:211:03:23

Open the door.

1:03:251:03:27

Drop the weapon.

1:03:341:03:36

Very good.

1:03:371:03:39

Step aside.

1:03:391:03:41

No.

1:03:411:03:43

Diablo Gato!

1:03:431:03:45

HE GASPS

1:03:451:03:46

Nice try.

1:03:461:03:47

MUFFLED SCREAM

1:03:491:03:50

Huh?

1:03:501:03:52

I hope you can forgive me.

1:03:591:04:01

Apology accepted!

1:04:011:04:03

I don't really have time for you.

1:04:051:04:07

I have to save the town from the Great Terror!

1:04:071:04:09

Wait, Puss!

1:04:091:04:11

Don't you see? I'm here because...

1:04:111:04:13

I am here because you made me realise

1:04:141:04:16

that there is something I care about more than gold.

1:04:161:04:20

Some...thing?

1:04:211:04:22

OK... Someone.

1:04:221:04:26

He's about two feet tall, wears high heels.

1:04:261:04:28

Handsome?

1:04:281:04:30

He's VERY handsome.

1:04:301:04:32

-A real beefcake?

-Mm-hm.

1:04:321:04:34

-A stallion?

-Yes.

1:04:341:04:35

-Tiger?

-Oh, brother.

1:04:351:04:37

HE CHUCKLES

1:04:371:04:39

-But this does not make us even.

-Freeze!

1:04:391:04:42

Yes, it does!

1:04:421:04:43

No, no, no, it doesn't.

1:04:431:04:45

GUARD WHIMPERS BOTH YOWL

1:04:451:04:48

HE SCREAMS

1:04:481:04:49

I saved you!

1:04:491:04:50

You owe me one.

1:04:511:04:52

You didn't tell me about Humpty.

1:04:541:04:55

So now you owe me two.

1:04:571:04:59

GUARDS SHOUT

1:05:011:05:03

-You're a lot of work.

-I know. But I am worth it!

1:05:031:05:06

Ha-ha!

1:05:061:05:08

Oof!

1:05:081:05:10

You are not getting away, Puss In Boots!

1:05:101:05:13

Wrong boots.

1:05:131:05:14

Kitty!

1:05:151:05:17

NOW we're even!

1:05:171:05:18

SHE YOWLS

1:05:181:05:19

This is your San Ricardo weather report.

1:05:261:05:29

Chances of a giant goose destroying the town...

1:05:291:05:32

100%.

1:05:321:05:33

'Never alone, always together...

1:05:381:05:41

'Humpty and Puss...

1:05:411:05:42

'brothers for ever.'

1:05:421:05:44

HE SIGHS

1:05:441:05:45

PEEPING

1:05:451:05:47

Come on, sweetie.

1:05:471:05:48

Let's, uh, get out of here before Mama shows up.

1:05:481:05:50

I should make you into an egg salad sandwich!

1:05:521:05:55

Ah! That is disgusting!

1:05:551:05:57

Give me the goose, Humpty.

1:05:571:05:59

No can do, I'm afraid.

1:05:591:06:01

See, the mama's on her way, and when she gets here,

1:06:011:06:03

it's bye-bye San Ricardo and everything you ever cared about!

1:06:031:06:07

Revenge on me is one thing, but why Imelda?

1:06:071:06:10

Why the orphanage?

1:06:101:06:11

This is our home.

1:06:111:06:13

You mean YOUR home.

1:06:131:06:15

HE SIGHS

1:06:151:06:16

I-I-I never belonged here.

1:06:161:06:18

We had a plan to get out of here,

1:06:181:06:20

but then you became a hero and you picked this place over me.

1:06:201:06:23

You left me with nothing.

1:06:251:06:27

Humpty...

1:06:311:06:33

I'm sorry I hurt you.

1:06:331:06:35

But do not take it out on these people.

1:06:371:06:39

You are better than this!

1:06:391:06:41

-No, I'm not.

-Oh, come on!

1:06:421:06:44

I know the real Humpty.

1:06:441:06:46

The way you saw the world!

1:06:461:06:48

The inventor! The dreamer!

1:06:481:06:50

What happened to that guy?

1:06:501:06:53

DISTANT ROARING

1:06:531:06:56

I... I think it's too late.

1:06:581:07:00

It is never too late to do the right thing.

1:07:001:07:02

Together we can save San Ricardo!

1:07:021:07:05

I can forgive you, Humpty...

1:07:101:07:12

if you help me now.

1:07:121:07:14

Really?

1:07:141:07:16

After everything I put you through?

1:07:161:07:18

Prove to me there is still a good egg in you.

1:07:181:07:21

I'll try.

1:07:241:07:25

THEY GASP

1:07:271:07:28

THUDDING

1:07:281:07:31

SHE GASPS

1:07:311:07:32

BULL BELLOWS

1:07:321:07:34

CHICKENS CLUCK

1:07:341:07:36

HONKS

1:07:391:07:41

HONKING

1:07:431:07:45

THEY GASP

1:07:461:07:48

HONKING

1:07:481:07:50

CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY

1:07:561:07:58

HISSES, ROARS

1:07:581:08:01

Ruuuuuuuunnnn!

1:08:011:08:03

SCREAMING

1:08:031:08:06

GOOSE ROARS

1:08:061:08:08

-Goggles, check.

-Get the baby over the bridge.

1:08:151:08:17

I'll get the mother to follow.

1:08:171:08:19

OK. Give me a... Whoa!

1:08:191:08:21

Ha-ha!

1:08:281:08:30

GOOSE ROARS

1:08:301:08:31

TOY SQUEAKS

1:08:311:08:33

HE GASPS

1:08:381:08:39

DUCK SQUEAKS

1:08:391:08:41

Mama Goose!

1:08:441:08:46

CROWD SCREAM Wait!

1:08:491:08:51

Just follow me and I will lead you to your baby.

1:08:511:08:54

SHE HONKS

1:08:541:08:56

No! Not that way!

1:08:591:09:02

Pequeno, help!

1:09:031:09:05

Hang on!

1:09:051:09:06

HE GRUNTS

1:09:071:09:10

Oh.

1:09:111:09:13

Whoa!

1:09:131:09:14

HE LAUGHS

1:09:141:09:15

That's my boy!

1:09:151:09:17

Ha!

1:09:171:09:19

Come with me, Mama Goose.

1:09:211:09:23

I know where your baby is.

1:09:231:09:24

Here.... SHE GRUNTS

1:09:241:09:26

Look!

1:09:261:09:28

HORSE WHINNIES SHE PEEPS

1:09:281:09:30

SHE HONKS SHE PEEPS

1:09:301:09:32

SHE BELLOWS

1:09:321:09:34

Ha-ha! Aaaaarrhh...!

1:09:341:09:37

Humpty, pick up the pace!

1:09:371:09:39

I'm trying, Puss! I'm trying!

1:09:391:09:42

SHE PEEPS HE SHRIEKS

1:09:421:09:44

Sorry, egghead, we want more than just eggs.

1:09:461:09:50

So how about you give us that goose!

1:09:501:09:52

Humpty! YOWLING

1:09:521:09:55

-Get her off!

-GUN BLAST

1:09:551:09:57

-Nice moves.

-What would you do without me?

1:09:571:10:01

THEY YELL

1:10:021:10:04

HE SHRIEKS

1:10:041:10:06

Freeze!

1:10:061:10:07

Comandante!

1:10:091:10:10

Uh, I can...explain?

1:10:101:10:13

Gato, you are going back to jail

1:10:131:10:16

if it's the last thing I do!

1:10:161:10:18

Humpty, hurry!

1:10:181:10:20

We're almost there. We're almost there!

1:10:201:10:23

HE YELLS

1:10:231:10:25

HUMPTY YELLS

1:10:331:10:35

HE SHRIEKS

1:10:381:10:39

ROARING

1:10:411:10:43

HE SCREAMS

1:10:431:10:46

-Puss, help!

-Humpty, hang on!

1:10:461:10:48

Puuuuuuss...!

1:10:481:10:51

PEEPING GRUNTING

1:10:521:10:55

Here we are again, right, Puss?

1:10:591:11:02

HE GRUNTS

1:11:021:11:04

I will not leave you behind this time, Humpty.

1:11:041:11:08

GEESE HONK AND PEEP

1:11:081:11:11

PEEPING

1:11:111:11:12

Uh...

1:11:141:11:16

I'm sorry, Puss.

1:11:161:11:17

I've made a mess out of everything.

1:11:171:11:19

I'm a rotten egg.

1:11:201:11:23

I'm not a person.

1:11:231:11:25

I'm not a bird. I'm not even a food.

1:11:261:11:29

I don't know what I am.

1:11:311:11:33

You are what you have always been.

1:11:331:11:36

My brother.

1:11:361:11:37

Brothers for ever.

1:11:401:11:41

SHE ROARS

1:11:431:11:45

Whoa!

1:11:451:11:46

HE SHRIEKS

1:11:461:11:48

THEY HONK AND PEEP

1:11:511:11:54

-You can't save us both.

-Yes, I can!

1:11:541:11:56

Just hang on!

1:11:561:11:59

Puss, you have to save the baby,

1:11:591:12:01

or the mama will destroy San Ricardo.

1:12:011:12:04

It's the right thing to do.

1:12:061:12:08

EARTH RUMBLES

1:12:081:12:10

I will not let you go, Humpty.

1:12:101:12:13

I know you won't.

1:12:141:12:17

So I won't make you choose.

1:12:171:12:19

Humpty!

1:12:201:12:21

ROARING

1:12:211:12:23

HONKING

1:12:361:12:38

I'm very sorry.

1:12:421:12:44

She's OK.

1:12:441:12:45

Humpty?

1:12:531:12:54

HE SIGHS

1:12:591:13:01

MOTHER HONKS BABY PEEPS

1:13:061:13:08

I always knew that you were good inside.

1:13:121:13:15

PEEPING AND HONKING

1:13:171:13:20

Goodbye, Humpty.

1:13:281:13:30

CHILDREN SHOUT PLAYFULLY

1:13:391:13:41

ADULTS CHATTER HAPPILY

1:13:411:13:44

It's him. Puss In Boots.

1:13:441:13:46

He saved us from the giant goose!

1:13:461:13:48

His sword is like lightning!

1:13:481:13:50

They say he has ten lives.

1:13:501:13:52

His boots are made of the finest Corinthian leather.

1:13:521:13:55

He only drinks whole milk.

1:13:551:13:58

Good leche.

1:14:011:14:03

He's no outlaw.

1:14:031:14:05

He saved us!

1:14:051:14:07

Uh, meow?

1:14:071:14:09

A gift for you, Mama.

1:14:091:14:11

I have to go.

1:14:151:14:16

The soldiers are coming for me.

1:14:161:14:19

I am so proud of you, my son.

1:14:211:14:23

HE PURRS

1:14:231:14:24

Today, you faced the past with bravery and honour.

1:14:261:14:30

You earned those boots.

1:14:301:14:33

And the people know that you are San Ricardo's greatest hero.

1:14:331:14:38

I did it for you, Mama.

1:14:391:14:41

You will always be in my heart.

1:14:421:14:45

And you in mine.

1:14:451:14:47

Gato! Hmm?

1:14:491:14:51

-KIDS:

-There he is!

-I see him!

1:14:511:14:54

CHEERING

1:14:541:14:56

-ALL:

-Huh?

1:14:561:14:57

CROWD CHEER

1:14:571:15:00

MUSIC: Americano by Lady Gaga

1:15:051:15:10

HE CHUCKLES

1:15:131:15:16

Ha! Ha!

1:15:241:15:26

BOTH CHUCKLE

1:15:261:15:29

I will see you again, Kitty Softpaws!

1:15:341:15:37

Sooner than you think!

1:15:371:15:39

Ah!

1:15:421:15:43

HE CHUCKLES

1:15:451:15:47

She is a bad kitty.

1:15:471:15:49

BLOWS KISS

1:15:511:15:53

'This is the story of a cat who became a hero.

1:15:551:15:58

'An outlaw dedicated to justice.

1:15:581:16:01

'And a lover of beautiful women.

1:16:011:16:03

'A great...great lover.

1:16:031:16:07

'Really. It is crazy.

1:16:071:16:09

I am Puss In Boots!

1:16:091:16:12

'And my name would become... legend!'

1:16:121:16:16

HORSE WHINNIES Ha-ha!

1:16:161:16:18

MUSIC CONTINUES

1:16:231:16:25

Ha!

1:16:281:16:29

HE LAUGHS

1:16:291:16:30

SHE SIGHS

1:16:341:16:36

PUSS CHUCKLES

1:16:361:16:38

SWOONING SIGH

1:16:381:16:40

Whoo-hoo!

1:16:421:16:44

Ha! CATS MEOW

1:16:461:16:48

Meow.

1:16:481:16:49

HE LAUGHS SHE PEEPS

1:16:521:16:53

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

1:16:571:16:59

PLAYFUL GROWLING

1:17:131:17:15

Ohhh!

1:17:321:17:34

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