Brittany Floyd on France

'I'm not doing gags about Barry Sheene

'and 49cc of raw, throbbing power because my journey's nearly over,

'but where better to finish than Concarneau in Brittany,

'and sample more of my first love? Or - in the words of Fats Waller - fish is still my favourite dish.'

'Here are some carefully composed snaps of Brittany

'as the spring sun tickles trees into leaf and cauliflowers to bud.

'Dead poetic or, as we say in Bristol, "It's great!"

'If this was Wales, they'd all wear cauliflowers in their lapels!

'On to the first cooking sketch.

'La Coquille is a great restaurant on the quay where all types devour great plates of fresh fish

'cooked by my mate Jean Francois Le Mettre. Smile at the camera!

'I asked him to show Brittany on a plate with local ingredients

'and he created a minor masterpiece he calls a blanquette de mer.

'This is just fillets of pollock,

'red mullet, mussels, langoustines gently poached in fish stock

'and served on a bed of cabbage and carrots.

'It's finished with a simple butter sauce.

'Add white wine to the fish stock, reduce it, whisk in butter at low heat to get a creamy sauce,

'the consistency of custard.

'And, to quote Jean Francois, "Voila!"

-Voila!

-That is extraordinary!

C'est extraordinaire! Merci beaucoup.

Strangely, in my pocket, I have a little fork

and I'm going to taste this because I have to follow it with a humble dish of my own.

-I won't win this competition(!) C'est tres, tres bon!

-Merci beaucoup.

The freshness, colour and artistry of a gentleman from Concarneau.

'Whose name I've forgotten!'

'This is one of France's largest fishing ports

'and the trawlers fish the waters off Scotland and Cornwall for weeks at a time.

'That'll cheer my friends at home!

'The ship's cook is as important as the skipper,

'responsible for bouillabaisse, coq au vin, morale and hangovers!

'Here in this gloomy hall, this Neptune's cathedral,

'the bream - dear, dear breamy -

'the Biarritz, eyes like jelly moulds,

'and the monkfish - dear, dear monkfish - lie in state,

'waiting for the last rites from rubber-aproned acolytes with flashing knives,

'before being shipped to the tables and stomachs of France.'

How can I make the humble and ugly lotte,

the thing we made famous in Floyd On Fish,

look anything like as good and as interesting as that splendid dish?

But I'm going to because I'm not afraid of French cooks.

I am Floyd, after all.

Look, I spent all this time filleting the lotte,

taking the bone out, chopping up parsley and garlic very finely

and stuffing it inside then tying it back with string.

Little, tiny knots, all hand-tied by myself. Up again, Clive, please.

I'm trying to talk to you. I don't have home economists,

like some television programmes I could mention. I do it all myself.

Anyway, over here, the bits we need -

a bit of cream...creme fraiche.

Muddled my words there cos its franglais.

Some little, white onions, sauteed in butter.

Some bits of smoked bacon,

blanched in boiling water for a couple of seconds and strained.

A bottle of Imperial Muscadet - a glass for myself, by the way.

Don't go away, Clive. And a knob of butter there.

So, it's all very, very simple.

All I have to do is put my merry onions in there like that,

with considerable panache,

sprinkle my little lardons like that,

grate a little bit of pepper over the whole thing,

sprinkle some salt on and it goes...

If you can stumble over this way, Clive. He's very tired.

He's had a hard morning. ...into the oven with a bang,

just to annoy the sound man, who hates things like that.

Anyway, what we are going to do now...

That takes about, oh, 15 minutes to roast in the oven.

Right next door, there is a superb soup factory. Soup de poisson.

I'm going to show you how it's all made.

Come with me and have a really good look.

No, this is not the hubble, bubble toil and trouble

from some avant-garde Shakespearean production of Macbeth.

This is me in a soup factory - a tinned soup factory.

And before I hear you cry,

"What on earth are you doing eating things out of tins?"

Let me tell you, this is Brittany,

this is Concarneau, where they put things into tins that taste good.

This is an amazing fish soup which,

100 years ago in the kitchen of the restaurant I've just been working

in, they started making, tinning it to sell to their clients

who thought it was so good they wanted to take some home.

Over the years, the business

has developed and developed and developed

and now this amazing soup is sold throughout the world.

Come and have a really good look in here, Clive.

This has no E numbers, no preservatives.

It has monkfish, bits of lobster, langoustines, olive oil,

butter, fresh leeks. Come up here a minute, Clive.

In fact, the fresh leeks -

I was in the bar having a glass of orange juice the other night

and a bloke came in with a little wagon, laden high with leeks.

He said, "You haven't met me before

"but I provide the leeks for Monsieur Courtin's soup factory."

The leek manufacturer was really proud of that.

Anyway, let's go on down here a bit.

I've got to make this soup, actually, you see.

I'm only making the television programme as a part-time job.

I've got to stir them all

to make sure they're all cooking quite nicely.

Yes? The only thing is, I can't really taste them

with these rubber gloves on, but I can assure you,

with the tomato puree, olive oil and all these fresh ingredients

I've been telling you, this soup, whether it is the soup de poisson,

which is a very, very strong fish soup,

or a creamy veloute of soup,

or the richest lobster soup in the world, it's absolutely fabulous.

Anyway, I'd better get back

cos I think my monkfish must be cooked by now.

DOG HOWLS

That's much better. Much better.

A little bit of fresh air cheers you up like nobody's business.

It should be well burnt... I mean, well cooked by now.

So, Clive, pop down here a second. We'll get the offending beast out.

Look at that. Sizzling to perfection.

Now, up, carefully, together. We'll do this together, Clive, shall we?

Put that on there. Stay there, because I'd forgotten the wine.

We have to add a little white wine to that to help make the sauce.

Then...

all this crashing and banging results in a superb dish,

in a moment, as you will see. The gigot goes on to there like that.

OK? Oh, that's not a spoon. Somebody should have noticed that.

It is a chinois - a thing for straining sauces,

not for picking them up with

as the sauce would go straight through the holes, you see.

Take out our little pieces of bacon, put that around it. Now...

Stay there, stay there, stay there. I told you to stay there.

I've got to go and get a few things from over here.

A little bit of creme fraiche into there. Whizz, whizz, whizz.

Not too much. Just like that. OK.

Then we enrich it with a knob of butter, like that.

We taste it.

It's very, very good.

And now we get our chinois, or chinoise, or whatever it's called.

We strain the sauce over it, like that, which is extremely brilliant.

OK. Stay there, because I've forgotten something else.

This is actually my first cooking sequence

in this part of the film, you see, so I'm always a little nervous.

A few chopped shallots on there,

spread the bacon out a little bit and you have a masterpiece.

And to prove it, I will cut a slice of the roast gigot of lotte,

right through the middle, like that, and you will see

pure, succulent, white, I hope, little pieces of fish. There we are.

Dead delicious, isn't it? Do you mind if I have a small bite?

With a piece of bacon.

Here's one of me enjoying myself.

-HE GIGGLES

-It's no good, I'm going to burst into fits of laughter.

CAR HORNS SOUND

TYRES SCREECH

'Apart from the amusing scene of its sea-going life,

'there's the attraction of a walled town.

'It's also a popular seaside resort, quoth Michelin,

'but, to me, the old walled town of Concarneau,

'like the other Seven Wonders of the World - you know, Severn Beach,

'Wookey Hole, Cheddar Gorge, the Pyramids et al -

'brings one thing to mind -

'candyfloss and crepe. And crepe is what it's all about.'

Absolutely remarkable lady!

Like a little sparrow, hopping around doing things.

She makes hundreds of these every day. It's quite incredible!

-Comme ca.

-Tres bon.

-Et maintenant un peu de beurre?

-Oui.

The cheese is beautifully melted.

The buckwheat pancake is crunchy and buttery

and the egg is a free-range one and delicious.

-C'est fabuleux!

-C'est tres bien.

-Fabuleux!

'I know you think I'm a hedonist,

'but I'm just a cook whose intentions are good.

'Not one to wear t-shirts with slogans.

'But if they keep fishing like this, the only tuna my daughter will see will be in a glass case.'

# Some future date

# A last silver tear will be shed

# There'll be blood in the water

# A victim of slaughter

# The last silver tuna

# Will be dead. #

Oh, dear! Oh, dear! There's a cameraman in the tree.

I'm just doing a light lunch for some friends.

I know you expect to find me in posh restaurants and hotels,

but sometimes a family is nice.

Because he loves architecture, the director chose this house,

not for a wonderful kitchen, but the shape of the whole building!

So here I am. Clive, come down into the kitchen.

Is that all right with you? Good.

See you in a moment.

I'm cooking Sunday lunch for my friends Michelle and Henri.

It's a superb Brittany dish - chicken roasted in cider.

We're roasting a chicken, but I'm serving it with baked apples stuffed with walnuts and raisins.

You'll see all this later on.

I'm serving it with fresh artichoke absolutely cleaned out,

just the heart and little leaves,

stuffed with a jardiniere de legumes,

little peas, lettuce, carrots, baby turnips and stuff like that.

You'll see this later. Film is expensive and the director prefers showing houses to cooking bits!

OK. While you were out playing in the garden,

I was busy in the oven here,

and I've got two free-range farmer's chickens

roasting in butter on a bed of chopped shallots and carrots.

At this stage I need to put some splendid Brittany cider in.

This will help me make a sauce later on, of cream, cider and Calvados.

That must now go into the oven for another three-quarters of an hour or so.

If you turn round now, you'll find Henri and Michelle busily preparing the hors d'ouevres.

-What are you actually making, Henri?

-A tuna fish salad.

-With tuna...des oignons...

-Onions.

Chou-fleurs...cauliflowers,

concombres, tomates,

quelques capres...pour relever le gout, et une petite vinaigrette.

-MICHELLE SHOUTS

-Uh-oh, bit of an old dragon!

-That's the rice.

-C'est lourd!

It's quite interesting here.

I say cooking is a family affair and these two are cooking together.

They've kept the kids out, but normally they'd do stuff as well.

Everybody likes to cook in this house, Henri?

Everybody likes to eat the food!

We don't have a lot of time, so usually the children help us.

-Why are you cooking langoustines for lunch?

-It is the quickest meal you can find - and I'm very lazy!

Usually, in Brittany, very often we begin with langoustines.

They are fresh, they are nice, easy to cook.

The only thing to know is that you mustn't leave them to cook too long.

-How long?

-See if the water is boiling

-and put them in it with some salt.

-Sea salt?

-Yes, sea salt.

-Then you wait for the first boiling and that's all.

-That's it!

If you leave them longer, they will be soft and not good to eat.

-You must stay with them, but it just takes a minute.

-Fine.

-It's nice for me!

You like a lot of time in here?

Well, yes, usually about ten minutes(!)

We like to eat, but we don't have a lot of time, so usually all the family are in here.

While the children do the table, I am doing something, my husband is doing something else.

-It takes ten minutes.

-Because you have fine, fresh ingredients?

Yes. As you see, Henri is sometimes in summertime making tuna fish salad,

because we have a nice garden. Many things come from the garden and it is not expensive.

Langoustines are easy to cook, so it's a nice meal, very easily.

-Who does the shopping?

-The one who has time - usually it's Henri.

-They must be about ready?

-Yes, they are.

They are boiling with a sort of white cream on it.

They are ready. You just stop and then...

..there you are.

And it's ready! You just need a dish now.

Tu passes un plat, Henri?

Henri's dropped a boo-boo! He hasn't got the plate ready.

No, il va etre trop petit.

Well, for its finish, the mayonnaise on top of that.

We do the mayonnaise. It takes two minutes, not more.

It's very nice only if it's not cold.

It's much nicer when it's just cooked. OK? We do the mayonnaise now.

En France on dit ne faut pas manger la bouche pleine.

-Non, c'est vrai.

-Voila.

Oui.

Qui en veut?

Tu en veux, Karen?

Oui.

Ah, tiens.

He's shy.

-I'm very shy!

-I am sure you are!

Anyway, the time has come for me to go.

I must carry on cooking, because these wonderful people won't get to eat unless I bring in my dish.

Just carry on. Enjoy yourselves. I've got to do the hard work.

'We let this sequence run on a bit because I was so enjoying lunch!

'I completely forgot the camera and I really felt at home here.

'That's what the French are about - food is family and sharing.'

This is a little dish I hope you'll enjoy enormously.

That's my sweated labour. While they ate langoustines,

I've actually been cooking!

What I want to do is just re-cap on how this was cooked.

A simple roast chicken on chopped shallots, onions and carrots, roasted in butter.

Pour in the cider, cook for one hour,

then put cored apples stuffed with walnuts and sultanas in the oven and put them round the chicken.

Strain off all the liquid, mix in some double cream and butter and strain that over the sauce.

And they haven't heard of this, even though it's a Brittany dish!

Here, some fresh vegetables stewed with bacon, carrot, little turnips, lettuce and stuff like that.

Done in butter and filled into the emptied shells of artichokes.

So that's what I've done. Bon appetit!

Tres bien. Je ne sais pas si c'est bon, mais ca sent bon.

'He says, "It smells good, let's hope it tastes good!" Doubting Thomas!

'It WAS a success, although they'd never heard of it!

'We finished with tarte au pomme.

'It wasn't a difficult lunch, just a harmonious melange of fresh produce and love. Yum! Yum!'

C'est tres bon! Mmm!

Tres bon! Vraiment tres bon.

LAUGHTER

# When you visit St Malo You have to see the sights

# The old town in the morning And by night the harbour lights

# It is famous for its vistas It is famous for its views

# The brilliance of the colour The diversity of views

# The vast fortifications And the picturesque old quays

# With amazing panorama And the prospects such as these

# You'd not credit they exist

# Lost in all this bloody mist! #

'That was the Nearly OK Chorale being very witty(!)

'This little caff nestling in the cobbled streets of St Malo inspired me.

'Jacques Yves and his dad are creating a little map of Brittany, the assiette de fruits de mer,

'from lobsters to winkles, clams to crabs,

'mussels to prawns, ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

'But the sea urchin, that tastes like a moonbeam on a calm sea, is superb!

'Expensive, but you could pick it from the shore.

'Forget lobster, try cockles, winkles, mussels and clams and perhaps the odd crab or two.'

There's a lot more to Brittany than sea food and pancakes.

It wasn't always a rich tourist area.

The real people eat humble things like this amazing dish today.

It's like Lancashire Hot Pot or Ireland's boiled bacon and cabbage.

It takes hours to do and we're far too busy to show it all properly.

We're bound to have a little glass.

You might have met Jacques Yves in Floyd On Fish.

Jacques Yves, while we muck about with all of these things,

you've got about two minutes to explain all about this dish.

We've got to fill this.

You watch all this. You can always find out.

Turn to page 76 of my brilliant new book for the exact details.

-Where does this come from?

-It used to be an old farmer's dish,

cooked by women in the fireplace,

and it's supposed to be a very poor dish,

because everything you need for that course is supposed to be at the farm.

You tie that up. It's a bit boring.

It's an old peasant dish, we're doing it very quickly.

That's buckwheat flour, eggs, butter, cream and milk, made like a dumpling.

Now, we have this brilliant piece of beef and bones of beef

and we put those into simmering hot water. Can you see that?

They go in there for about two and a half hours,

to simmer very slowly for a rich juice.

-Also... Out of the way, for Heaven's sake!

-Sorry!

Imagine that has simmered for two and a half hours.

So we put in some onions - one, two, three, four onions.

A couple of little turnips, a few carrots,

and a few leeks and we let that simmer for about 20 minutes.

20 minutes has passed - we then put in the cabbage, for which Brittany is famous.

That was two and a half hours ago.

At the same time, in this big boiling pot we've got water.

We have this dumpling which we put in there, but we don't -

we pass that to the director, who wouldn't get in the World Cup!

-What about this?

-Oh! I forgot to put the smoked bacon and sausages in!

They go in for the last hour or so.

At the same time, these dumplings have been cooked. Can you still see me?

Let me show you what happens next.

You have...these brilliant pieces of meat, cabbage and vegetables.

Look at that - beautiful!

There's the beef cooked.

OK? There's the consomme you'll eat as a soup before the dish.

There's the cabbage we added almost at the end of the cooking.

There are the carrots - it's really rather good, isn't it?

Now, go weed the garden, read cookery books, do your yoga and we'll dish it up to taste.

Well, there you are.

OK, long, loving pan across this -

smoked bacon, rib of beef, smoked sausage, turnips,

little carrots, cabbage and this splendid dumpling.

It's typical in France - a long-cooked dish with simple ingredients.

Why, in Britain, are we ashamed of what we do?

Lancashire Hot Pot is exactly the same kind of thing.

This is a peasant farmer's dish.

Curiously, you do not eat this with cider or wine or beer, but with milk.

I met Jacques Yves two years ago when this series Floyd On France was created.

One night we were sipping our milk with nothing better to do on a cold night

and we planned Floyd On France. Good night.

Subtitles by BBC