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This week on Great British Menu - technical Chris Holland...

There's always that element of doubt, if you like.

..Heston Blumenthal-trained Mary-Ellen McTague...

I don't know about you two, but I've found one of the toughest

things about this competition is the amount of scrutiny your cooking's under.

..and returning three-times loser Aiden Byrne.

Is that a vessel for a gravy or is that a vessel for gravy?

..have been challenged to create playful, witty dishes

for the chance to cook at a special banquet,

celebrating 25 years of Red Nose Day.

Yesterday's fish course levelled the playing field...

OK, cutting it very fine now, you've got to get it up on the pass on time.

..as Mary-Ellen made a fatal mistake...

That's an unfortunate howler.

..and is now sharing first place with Aiden,

who hit the brief on the nose!

-That's another one that makes you smile.

-Yeah.

Today it's the main course,

and Mary-Ellen needs to prove she can deliver.

Oh, BLEEP!

Barley grass, barley grass.

And Aiden is giving it everything he's got.

I've put the bells and whistles on with my starter and fish course -

wait until you see this one, it's an absolute blinder.

But will his confidence get in the way?

BLEEP!

This year's challenge is to create a performance on a plate.

Aaaagh!

The chefs have joined forces with some of Britain's best-known entertainers...

Thank you very much.

Wooo!

..to raise a laugh and some cash for Comic Relief.

Cheers, and this is only the first one!

Judging the chefs all week is last year's fish course champion,

and two Michelin-starred legend, Phil Howard.

The main course is a big one, the dishes need to top the bill.

I want to be able to give a ten, actually,

but I have to be able to justify it.

Today's the day, isn't it? The main course day is the main event,

and Phil has actually said, "Give me a plate of food which

"I can award a ten," and, I have every intentions of doing that.

-I think we all do.

-Yeah, me, too.

And it is very close, as well - it's all to play for.

Absolutely. So, yeah, good luck.

Thank you, and you.

First up is newcomer, Chris Holland,

a technical chef, who, after a poor start, finished joint first

yesterday, leaving him only one point behind.

Given how the scoring went yesterday, one point is nothing.

I feel I can pull that back,

so I'm looking forward to the challenge.

Main course, pineapples? So, what are you cooking today?

I am cooking today for you a tasting of pork, using pork belly,

I'm using some pork fillet, I've got pineapple to go with it,

to give it some zing, some blue cheese.

Fun elements today, I'm going to do something a little bit

interesting with mashed potato - turn it into a smiley face...

which will hopefully make you smile.

Pork, pineapple, blue cheese - it's going off, not on a tangent,

but it's going off to a little creative place, and I like that.

Chris is looking for top marks again, for his playful

tasting of pork, with strong flavours and potato smiley faces.

Blue cheese, pineapple, pork - they are not unknown together,

and it could be fantastic.

Smiley faces is a little bit cheesy,

or it could just be naff, and it depends how he delivers it.

Next up is returning contender Aiden Byrne,

currently in joint first place.

With three failed prior attempts in the competition,

he's desperate to win.

It's a real tight race, at the moment, to be honest with you.

It's anyone's game, and I can't be seen taking my foot off the pedal

in any shape or form - I've really got to nail it today.

Morning!

Morning, Mr Byrne. OK, so what are you cooking today?

Right, loads of beef in there. So, I'm going to long horn beef,

and a noodle pot, with a twirly fork.

With a twirly fork?

OK, I need some more detail, talk me through it.

Right, so, three different cuts of meat, all cooked in a very different

way, the oxtail, I'm going to smoke it, ox cheek,

I'm going to braise that, and then the beef fillet I'm going to

roll over a barbecue - a nice grilled flavour.

We've got potatoes, I'm going to bake them in clay.

Basically, the clay forms a really fine skin around the potato,

and you smash into them, lovely.

-You eat the clay.

-Yeah.

OK, you're happy it works for the brief?

That's a banquet dish.

That's a banquet dish!

It's quite a dramatic dish. I'm going to give you your 10/10 today.

Aiden, I look forward to it.

-Thanks very much, cheers.

-Good luck.

Aiden's looking to wow today with three cuts of beef,

clay-baked potatoes and a witty noodle pot.

Whether the pot of noodles, a slightly Asian take, is going to work

with the raw and rugged nature of the rest of the dish,

we'll just have to wait and see.

He's used a Pacific potato, I don't see how dipping it in clay

and then quickly baking it is going to really add something to it,

I'm not looking forward to eating clay, but I'm ready to be surprised.

Last up is inventive Mary-Ellen McTague.

Despite sharing first place with rival Aiden,

she's struggled with the delivery of her dishes all week.

I need to be organised and focused and in control, because

I was a bit out of control with the other courses.

Morning, morning. Come on, what are we going to cook today, then?

My main course is Our Kid. Here we have a beautiful, milk-fed kid goat,

so, we're going to be doing a few different things with this,

braising the leg, the shoulder, then the loin will be served as a chop.

The other two main ingredients are the cauliflower, which is going

to be done in lots of different ways, then pearl barley,

as well, is going to form part of the lasagne,

which I'm making lasagne sheets from goat's milk.

How's that happening?

I'm using agar and LT100 in combination, just to give it a bit

of stretch, but enough bite.

OK. Your grass patch here, what's happening with that?

So, this is barley grass.

As a garnish it just brings a bit of freshness.

OK, OK.

The Comic Relief connection...

Yes, that was going to be my next line of interrogation!

Goat just leapt into my mind, it's just the first food I associate

with other countries more than our own.

This dish falls into the more serious category.

OK, good luck, everybody! Main course, come on, let's have a 10!

-Good luck.

-Thank you very much.

Mary-Ellen is dishing up a serious plate of food,

with humour in the title, serving a goat's loin chop,

next to a cutting edge goat's milk lasagne.

The lasagne component of her dish could be style over

substance, because the truth is, agar is not an enjoyable texture,

and there's a lot of stuff going on there,

and I want to see her get on top of her skills to deliver

a hot, vibrant, lively plate of food.

Mary-Ellen, do you think Phil bought into your philosophy on the thing?

He seemed to.

I think you sold it to him really well, to be honest.

My dish, it's a serious foodie's dish, you know there's a lot of work

involved, and I certainly haven't got time to be standing here

chatting to you two, anyway,

but the show-stopping theatre that I've brought to it really sits

well with the brief.

I put bells and whistles on with my starter and fish course,

but wait until you see this one, it's an absolute blinder.

-Can't wait.

-I can't wait either, I'm petrified!

Aiden's looking for top marks today to propel him into the lead,

and has given himself plenty to do with his beef main course.

He's working on the noodle pot element, preparing mushrooms,

making burnt-onion noodle dough and a rich onion consomme.

I can't possibly resist sticking a spoon in there.

Yeah, got a kick to it.

And then, basically, mushrooms, onions, noodles,

they'll go into my noodle pot.

Would you like to see my noodle pot?

Yes, I'd absolutely love to see it.

This, here's my noodle pot.

Sticker on top.

And then...

PHIL LAUGHS

..a noodle fork.

Oh, Mr Byrne.

Very good.

I think Aiden, on this course, it's just impressive attention to detail.

My only real concern about this dish is he's got these big, butch

bits of beef which are intended to satisfy in a certain kind of a way,

and then he's got, from what I understand, a very wet liquid going

with it, and the two have got to somehow mix,

so you can eat them together, and they've got to deliver

and I'm not sure whether that'll happen, I hope it does,

because otherwise it's got great, great potential.

I really believe that I've nailed it on this one, I'm convinced

that Phil's going to be chuffed to bits with this one,

I'm feeling comfortable inside.

Closest rival Mary-Ellen has run into a problem.

I don't think this acetate was made for hot things...

BLEEP!

I've got some decent acetate.

Have you?

I think it's better than that.

Yeah, thank you.

With another mistake added to her already troubled track record,

Mary-Ellen has no choice but to do another mix for her technical

goat's milk lasagne sheets, which will be used to form a goat

and pearl barley lasagne on her kid goat dish.

So what have we got going on over here?

A few things.

-Tell me about your lasagne.

-Yes.

That's what I want to hear about. It's my one reservation on your list.

It's only called a lasagne because that's exactly

what it looked like.

I wanted the milk curd to be layered with the meat

so you'd get a spoonful and a bite of everything in one go,

so, would you like to try it.

Yes, I would.

The truth is, big lumps of agar are not particularly...

Big lumps, no, but...

I think a thin...a very thin layer.

It hasn't got any of the real downside texture of agar.

-Keep going.

-Thank you.

I still can't help but feel that if you want to do a lasagne,

and you want to get the eating quality of a lasagne, which is

something quite special, where the textures matter, she'd be better off

just using some pasta. She's not got a nasty texture there, but I still

can't help but feel, "Hey, keep it simple!"

Mary-Ellen is not the only one using modern ingredients on her

main course.

Technical Chris is relying on a contemporary gelling agent

for the potato mix, that will make the smiley faces on his tastings of pork dish.

It's all go over here, talk me through this mix.

So, we've got dry mashed potato, butter, and methasol

which is going to set the potato

so I still get, obviously, the smiley face.

Fingers crossed, the methasol works.

It was the fingers crossed that slipped out of your tongue...

there's always an element of...

I think when you're in an alien kitchen and under the pressure

that we're under there's always that element of doubt, if you like.

In the middle of them I'm putting the pork from the rib bones

that I've made the stock with.

This looks lovely.

Blue cheese, and nice natural seasoning to go with the other

ingredients.

It will be really interesting to see if the combination of the

pineapple, the pork and the blue cheese works together.

Bacon and blue cheese is a classic, I don't quite know where

pineapple fits into that.

But Chris' combination of flavours have already been tried and tested,

on well-known comedian and Comic Relief supporter, Sarah Hadland.

Best known for her role as singing sidekick, Stevie,

in comedy series, Miranda.

Mmmm!

I'm having a taste sensation in my mouth.

They've come to this busy market in Croydon, Surrey,

for a more important reason.

Here's our lucky bucket.

Let's make some money.

Let's get lots of money in here.

And to raise as much cash as they can,

Sarah has been taught a few magic tricks...

# Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. #

..which hopefully will impress the public and get the money rolling in.

Anybody want to see any magic?

OK, guys, come and have a look at some magic.

-Me and my magic tea towel.

-You, sir?

I love magic.

I need a note. A five pound note. Perhaps a ten pound note.

Do you have such a thing?

I only carry twenties.

You only carry twenties! Twenties are fine.

So we know this is definitely yours, we're going to write your name on it.

OK.

-All right?

-Yes.

Now, I'm going to fold this five pound note.

I put Monique's money in the middle here...

and I simply...

cover it thus.

-There we are, can you all see that?

-Yes.

And can you just check your five pound note is still under there?

Put your hands under.

-She doesn't need to do a full reveal...that's it.

-Still there.

And then...

Oooh!

Monique's loving it, Monique's loving it!

Where's it gone?

We'll start by maybe taking a random pineapple,

although I think we should pick this one - a regular pineapple...

Ooh, he's strong!

..and we're going to cut all the way round the pineapple.

We're going to twist the top of the pineapple,

and take it away...

-Oooh!

-Oh, my goodness!

That could be your five pound note, if you'd like to check.

Oh, my goodness, how did that happen?

Is it yours, though, is it yours?

Aaaagh!

But can the results of Chris' work in the kitchen

match his magic skills?

-OK.

-Well done.

Oh, that was easy.

That's good, that is.

Delicious.

Do try, madam, it's scrumptious.

It's doable.

Well, thank you for trying it.

INAUDIBLE SPEECH

-Bye-bye.

-Thank you very much.

Doable! Doable! Does she know who this is? This is Chris!

Doable!

Thank you very much.

All in all, it soon proves to be a fruitful day.

I think we did pretty well.

I think so!

With plating up approaching, Chris's smiley faces for his

tastings of pork dish have come out of the oven.

Oh, look at this, how have these done?

They have worked, yeah.

So in a couple of minutes I'll flip those out

and I'll just pan-fry the face nice and gently so you get a golden

colour on it.

Are you happy with the way everything's come out so far?

-So far, so good.

-Good.

But Aiden soon steals the limelight from rival Chris,

with his edible clay-baked potatoes.

Dipped into clay to look like rocks, for his longhorn beef dish.

Well, it's different!

Wowee!

The first question I have to ask is, "What was edible clay made for?"

Why does it exist?

Other than potato asteroids on...

I don't have that answer, I'm afraid.

What is it, what is the clay?

It's called kaolin clay.

-Is it a natural product. Is it actual clay?

-Yes, yes.

It's the make up of the dish, really.

I'm looking for this real prehistoric approach on it.

What's it going to mean to eat?

Once you bite into this, because I'm baking the clay

it will have a crisp exterior, with that lovely beautiful, gold, velvety

centre.

-I have to say, I'm really looking forward to trying that.

-Me too.

I'll have to take my dentures out.

Aiden's dish looks like it's going to be incredible,

he has got a lot of tricky things going on, though.

Clay-baked potatoes, which I've never seen before,

that's going to be interesting to see how he does that.

But Mary-Ellen's got enough worries of her own.

Phil's keeping a close eye on her goat main course, after she

delivered her starter late and made foolish mistakes on her fish course

yesterday. He is particularly interested in one of her garnishes.

-How's your astroturf?

-Yeah!

That's my barley grass.

-Can I taste a bit of the barley grass?

-Yeah.

-Do you grow this yourself?

-Yes.

I have trays of it at home.

Wow, a gardener.

It is quite mild, isn't it?

But it's grassy, it's a very raw taste.

It is, I like that. I like just the contrast

between the really raw and the really cooked.

It's just the two opposite ends of the spectrum.

I think Mary-Ellen has probably got another dish up her sleeve

that I'll enjoy.

She's just got to improve her cooking skills and her delivery.

And nail it so it's hot and right and accurate and full of vitality.

That's what I want to see from Mary Ellen today.

I don't know about you two, but I've found one of the toughest

things about this competition is the amount of scrutiny your cooking

is under.

It makes you feel odd, but in an enjoyable sort of way.

Wait till you're in that judge's chamber, mate...

Talk about feeling that big!

It's not a pretty place to be.

First to plate up is Chris,

who's got a lot of last minute frying to do.

His pork belly, pork fillet

and potato smiley faces all go in a pan for a golden crust.

Meanwhile, he starts his plate with pineapple gel,

pineapple jelly,

and pork scratchings.

Very colourful, Chris!

I'm a colourful sort of guy, mate!

He continues with pork belly,

pork fillet,

blue cheese,

cabbage and his centre piece, a smiling face of potato.

On the side, a jug of pork sauce.

-Certainly a smile on the plate there, is it going to smile on my face?

-I hope so.

Come on, let's go and eat it.

So, looks cute.

The smile's there, but where's the theatre?

It needs to be a showstopper, and that is not a showstopper.

For me, it's fun, it's a little bit different, it hits the brief.

Are you happy with the depth of flavour in the fillet?

Yes.

A bit of the fillet. It's not blowing my taste buds away.

OK, let's have a little look at Mr Brief.

Happy with it?

Really happy with it?

That's really nice.

On its own, that's stunning, that.

The pineapple and the blue cheese, are they working together?

Cheese and pineapple, for me, always a winner.

-I don't like the pineapple with that blue cheese.

-It's mad!

Anything that you might have done differently?

No, I'm really happy with it.

Are you worried?

I'm a little bit less worried.

OK. Hear, hear!

Well, I don't know how that went...

I think Phil was pleased,

I was pleased, it was a nice dish for me, so...I'm happy.

Next up is Mary-Ellen, who needs to prove she can stay cool

and deliver on time.

She starts her plate with goat lasagne.

Tell me what's in the lasagne again?

So, we've got pearl barley, and braised and pulled leg meat.

What are the sheets, the lasagne sheets?

These are goat's milk, set with LT and agar.

Next on are her goat chops, encrusted in cauliflower ash,

followed by goat-leg meat,

parsley oil,

florets of raw cauliflower,

roast cauliflower,

cauliflower yoghurt

and finally, goat gravy.

But there's one thing missing.

-Is that what you wanted?

-Yeah.

-Good, let's go and try it.

-OK.

Oh, BLEEP! Barley grass, barley grass.

Barley grass.

OK, come on then, let's pop them on.

I'm sorry.

BLEEP idiot!

So sorry!

Have you thought about how you're going to get this delicate assembly

out hot to 80 people?

It's definitely possible.

Happy with the temperature?

Um, it could be warmer.

-It is cold.

-Stone cold.

-Is all the goat cooked to perfection?

-Yeah, I think so.

It takes a long, slow cooking at low temperature.

So that's the goat.

-Delicate.

-It's very delicate. But I'm not appreciating it, Chris.

There is no heat there.

-The overall salt content, are you happy?

-Yes, I am.

It's my part that the seasoning's right.

I've literally got a layer of salt on my tongue.

It does taste a little salty.

The lasagne, are you happy it's come together to create the flavour you wanted?

-For me, that's a nice balanced mouthful.

-OK.

The lasagne sheet...

It's just salt again. Raw salt.

-It's the winning dish.

-I'm happy with what I've produced.

Are you confident now with your main course?

-If I'm honest, I feel a lot more confident.

-OK.

Erm... I think...

I can't tell whether he liked that or not, actually.

So, it's very difficult to read.

BLEEP

What was that?

My pan fell on the floor but, luckily enough, it fell the right way.

Good stuff!

Last up is Aiden, who has even more props up his sleeve than he first let on.

He starts off his prehistoric rib cage of beef

with onion-encrusted oxtail

and places his beef fillet in a special indoor barbecue.

Next onto his plate are his clay-baked potatoes,

ox cheek,

fossilised salsify,

and a jug of onion consomme for his noodle pot.

I never put you down to be a dab hand at the old ironing, Aiden!

I'm choosing to ignore you, Chris, I'm afraid.

Classically done in a microwave.

Finally, he pours beef sauce into a horn,

and adds his final cut, beef fillet.

There you go.

-Wow!

-Wowee! That looks amazing.

If ever there was a plate of food fit for centrestage that was it!

I am absolutely itching to get stuck in there.

Extraordinary plate of food.

I have to say, I'm absolutely speechless.

It's just completely spectacular.

-And it really does make you smile.

-Yeah.

There you go. There's our noodles.

That's just ace!

The noodles go with the rest of the dish.

I brought in the noodles along with the flavour and I think they sit quite comfortably with it.

-Tasty. Nicely seasoned.

-Lovely.

The reason for the clay was for the theatre.

It doesn't do any harm to the dish at all.

-It's a good potato.

-Mm.

Does the outside bring anything?

I don't think it does anything for the flavour of the potato - good or bad -

but it looks amazing.

I think it's got its place for that reason alone.

-Unique piece of meat, a cheek.

-Absolutely. It's melt in your mouth.

Exactly what I wanted.

And this is the cheek.

A real good depth of flavour in there.

A bit of fillet on the barbecue.

Barbecued meat flavours are kind of prehistoric in themselves, aren't they?

And with fillet, it's adding a nice roasted flavoured to it.

-Has it delivered what you wanted?

-I'm happy, Phil, yeah. I'm very happy.

-I can see this at the banquet.

-Yeah, it's a worry.

I'm completely gobsmacked.

Oh! It was hard work, that was!

-That was sensational.

-Thank you very much.

-Amazing.

-Thank you.

-Shame you didn't use many props!

I really struggled to find fault, so...

I'm filling up!

Hello, crew.

ALL: Hello.

So, Chris, for your tasting of pork.

Like the idea, I like the take on the brief. The smiley face.

It was absolutely delicious.

I liked the collection of ingredients.

On the downside, I did feel it just ended up being independent flavours

that just didn't come together in perhaps as interesting a way as they could have done.

It was somehow slightly less than the sum of the parts you had.

Mary Ellen, your kid. Our kid.

I really liked your interpretation of the brief

and intelligent interpretation.

I was a little bit concerned about the lasagne.

The truth was, that whole entity was layered

with an understanding of what those various components

would contribute to eat together as a whole.

I liked it. The sauce was delicious.

But, there was a temperature issue.

It's a delicate dish to plate and, actually,

that brings me on to the final point which is you haven't yet done

anything to instil in me the confidence you will be able to deliver something that delicate

to 80-odd people, hot, on time.

Aiden, for your Longhorn beef and noodles.

I wasn't quite sure how you're going to have this big, butch meat

on the one hand with, effectively, wet noodles on the other.

Having eaten the dish,

I thought the new deals were a complete triumph, I have to say.

I suppose the truth is, in the end what we saw with that dish was

a magnificent display of craftsmanship right across the board.

The spectacular understanding of ingredients and how to cook them.

Also, what a great take on the brief.

It makes me feel quite emotional

because if you're into food on the level that we are all into food,

it's very rare that something takes you to that little place where

you have to just put your hands up and say, magnificent!

Congratulations.

So, Chris, for your tasting of pork...

I'm going to give you

seven points.

Mary-Ellen, for your kid, I'm going to give you...

..eight points.

Aiden, for your Longhorn beef and noodles...

I find it hard to justify giving you anything other than ten points.

-Congratulations.

-Thank you.

-Congratulations.

-Oh!

OK. Three down, one to go. I don't think anybody is out of it.

Pastry, in all the competitions I've ever judged,

actually is a real make or break.

Good luck.

I knew that was a ten.

So with one course to go, Aiden's shot out in front with 25 points.

Mary-Ellen's not far behind with 23.

And Chris needs to play catch-up with 21.

I can't explain how I'm feeling.

Elation is not a strong enough word.

I'm really happy I've managed to get an eight on my main course.

It's better than I was expecting, to be honest.

I'm feeling a bit deflated about my score. But I believe in my dessert. I'll come back firing.

Tomorrow it's the dessert and their last chance to impress.

This has to be the mother of all parfaits!

Aiden's out in front, but it doesn't mean a ticket to the judges.

I could end up going home tonight.

Only two chefs can go through to cook for the judges tomorrow.

I'm afraid we have to say goodbye.