Episode 12 Instant Restaurant

Two rival amateur cooks are converting their homes into restaurants.

They have been given just one day and a budget of up to £200.

Two hours behind schedule.

So...

Love black pudding. I'm confident it should turn out OK.

20 strangers will be judging the results.

It will be entirely up to the diners to decide how much or how little they pay.

Enjoy.

Very enjoyable. Enjoyed that very much.

Chewy, very dry.

Is yours as greasy as mine?

So can the cooks deliver the goods and will either of them make a profit?

Hello and welcome to Instant Restaurant.

Just imagine what it would be like to turn your home into a restaurant

for one night only for paying guests.

Well, today's two rivals are up for the challenge.

But do either of them have what it takes to make a profit?

First up 49-year-old former RAF officer, John Whale from Wolverhampton.

He plans to give his guests a little taste of the military world.

I reached the rank of sergeant and tonight's theme for the restaurant is the sergeant's mess.

To make sure all his tables are all present and correct,

he's borrowed some shiny memorabilia to hopefully strike the right note.

I did a posting in the Falklands Islands and one of sites I was on

had a bar in there and that was called the Quaffery.

And I always thought for years it would be great idea to have that as the Quaffery.

His rival is 22-year-old Kiera McCleary, a biomedical science student, who is going

to turn her Birmingham family home into a Caribbean-themed restaurant.

Tonight I will be cooking Caribbean food, because it's the food of my heritage.

It is something that I love, something that I enjoy and something that I really appreciate.

But it's not just about the food.

It is about creating the whole restaurant experience.

My restaurant is called Eat, Drink Laugh Caribbean.

And I think the name is fitting, because I'm cooking with

my two best friends, so we're in there having a fantastic time.

One, two, three.

My first helper is Julia.

She's my best friend and she's a great cook as well.

My other helper is Ashley, who is my other best friend and I knew she would be up for a challenge.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures. Hence why I am ironing my shirt.

I called her in, she was like yeah, straightaway. So it's been fantastic.

As the boss, Kiera knows tonight is really about

the diners having a fantastic time and she's determined to make it happen - friends or no friends.

I know they're trying their best,

but I've got to get a move on really.

The stress is starting to start a little bit now,

so it's going to be now where she's going to start shouting.

Back at John's Quaffery.

Right, that can go into the fridge.

His kitchen army is made up of fellow food foot soldiers, private Debbie and Andy.

Feeling good, looking good and feeling confident.

Hopefully anyway.

What do you reckon?

Hmm! But it's what the diners think that really matters.

Both cooks have been given an allowance of up to £200.

John asked for just 64 quid, so to march into profit

each of his diners need only part with just over £6.40 a head.

Kiera's decided she needed to spend nearly £100 more - a hefty £161.

So she must take a might over £16 a head if she is to break even.

-It was a very quick learning curve...

-So we have got John's elite catering unit...

I'm confident it should turn out OK.

..fighting it out with Kiera's taste of the Caribbean.

However, Kiera's not really worried about her rival.

One, two, three, go...

She's more concerned about potential customers.

The worst, the absolute worst would be if I had a room full of West Indian grandparents.

That would be the worst, because they'd be like, "That's wrong, you didn't do that right.

"What kind of curry powder did you use? This is wrong, this is wrong."

That would be the worst.

At 6.30, 20 food-loving strangers begin turning up at the houses-cum-restaurants.

DOORBELL RINGS

-You're up, Deb.

-Hello, welcome to the Quaffery.

John's team jump to it, leaving their commander ready to do battle with his three-course menu.

-Nervous?

-You ain't?

-Yeah.

Meanwhile at Kiera's establishment, as the diners arrive, she is giving her troops a last-minute pep talk.

Good evening, welcome to Eat, Drink Laugh Caribbean.

DOORBELL RINGS

A very last-minute pep talk.

Leave them for a few seconds just so they can read the menu.

Don't go too soon, because you'll look like you're hounding them,

but don't leave it too long, because you will look like you're forgetting them.

And don't forget the door.

And then we'll come back and we'll go from there.

DOORBELL RINGS

-All right then.

-Happy that her staff is sufficiently motivated, Kiera finally

lets them get on with their jobs.

Hi, good evening, welcome to Eat Drink Laugh Caribbean.

-Thanks for coming.

-Well remembered, Ashley.

And I will give you a menu for you to...

Personally, I prefer to get the menu at the table.

-If you would like to follow me.

-But in the corridor is fine.

I'm just going to leave you to have a look at the menu then I will be back shortly.

Thank you.

So while Kiera's diners settle in,

over at John's Quaffery, what's the diners' first impression of his military-themed restaurant?

They've done it really well.

It looks good, the table's good.

Not enough cutlery though.

So they've clocked the knives and forks, but managed to miss all four of the 19th century bugles.

When I arrived at the property, I was quite pleasantly surprised -

the ambiance in the front room was nice, the decor was nice.

Nicely set table.

Would have been probably be nice

to have jugs of water ready on the table for when we sat down.

To share your table with another person,

I would say that we, as a couple, it's not a problem.

I think it just makes a better evening sometimes, because sometimes

-when there's two of you, it can get quite boring.

-Oh, thank you.

Oops, the less said about that the better.

Back at Kiera's it seems things aren't quite as colourful as the diners were hoping for.

I would expect a Caribbean restaurant to have murals on the wall,

a very lively party atmosphere.

And this was a room in somebody's house.

It could have done with something on the walls.

The table was nice though. It is quite cosy.

I expected it to be a bit more of a Caribbean theme.

But yeah.

Generally welcoming.

And some of her diners have high expectations.

Normally if I'm eating Caribbean food

I normally go down to my mum's and have it.

Because she's a very good cook.

Looks like Kiera could have some exacting customers in tonight.

It's just really nice.

As long as the food is as good as everything else.

Ooh, no pressure there then.

So Kiera's restaurant isn't as Caribbean

as her guests were expecting

and no-one noticed all that glorious military silver at John's.

But now it's the food that needs to shine.

So quick march to John's for starters.

For starters, John's serving up seared scallops on a bed

of home-grown leeks, with a ginger and cream sauce.

While his other option

is black pudding croquettes on a rocket salad,

with mustard dressing and a soft poached egg on top.

I really love black pudding and I think black pudding's something

everyone should try and also the home grown veg is fantastic.

Black pudding, for me is a no-no.

And I'm not into seafood either.

But the ginger cream sounds enticing.

Ooh, just as well Kiera's not one of John's guests then.

Two hours before the diners arrive, John attacked his first dish

-and its controversial main ingredient.

-I love black pudding.

In all its forms.

But this concoction of cooked pigs' blood with lumps of fat

isn't popular with everyone.

You can always tell a nice black pudding by the amount of fat.

A lot of people put a large amount in and you get great big chunks of fat in.

But this is lovely chopped up, I've had this before and it's beautiful.

I would imagine

you either like black pudding or you don't.

and I personally don't like it.

I like black pudding myself,

but I only like it fried.

John mixed it with mashed potato to form mini-croquettes

that were then dunked in flour, egg and breadcrumbs.

Come service time, John breaks out the heavy artillery - lard!

Blimey, he's not really adding more fat to that black pudding, is he?

It's better than any cooking oil.

I'm putting three to four packs in.

I will try with three first. See how we go.

So with the choice of black pudding or seafood,

which are the diners going to opt for?

I will have the scallops.

-Scallops.

-Surprise, surprise, scallops on the bed of leeks

and ginger cream sauce, please.

Scallops and salmon. Scallops and salmon, scallops and salmon. Yes.

That's what you might call voting with your feet.

I need two black pudding and I need eight scallops.

With the orders in, John gets busy.

The scallops are now just going into a bit of butter and frying them off.

Look after the leeks for me, just fry them off.

The scallops are quickly cooked in butter

and if they're looking slightly emaciated,

it's because John's on economy measures and chopped them in half.

There's going to be four scallops per dish.

Meaning four halves per dish.

Which is of course only two whole scallops.

You won't want too much on there.

The shellfish goes on a bed of sauteed leeks,

with a ginger and cream sauce.

After being cooked in lashings of lard,

the black pudding croquettes are finished off

with a drizzle of mustard dressing.

But I'm sure there was something else mentioned on the menu.

Oh yes, the poached egg.

Let's just hope the diners don't notice either the lack of an egg,

-or the size of the scallops.

-Smells nice.

-This is nice.

-Mmm, a bit tough around the edges.

I have got to be frank, I think the scallops were quite small,

very rubbery and I found it a bit greasy and I didn't taste any ginger.

It was most enjoyable, the problem was the plate was a bit cold

and the scallops didn't seem to be of normal depth.

They seemed to be a bit skinny.

With the starter, not to sound greedy or anything, but it seemed

like a small portion, maybe an extra top up would have made it decent.

What about the black pudding,

did anyone notice it was lacking a certain something?

My starter, I had the black pudding, deep fried with poached egg.

However they forgot the poached egg, which is a main part of your meal.

That is what it is advertised as.

-She just said: "Where's the egg?"

-Oh!

-Don't worry!

-I forgot the poached egg.

It just makes it a little bit dry,

because you haven't got the egg there to soak it.

A bit like bacon and egg without the egg, isn't it?

Oh, stupid!

Bummer.

Let's see if Kiera can get off to a smoother start.

Oh I'm burning, absolutely everything.

I'm about two hours behind schedule

and my schedule did run up to 6 o'clock.

So...

If the girls manage to sort themselves out in time

they will be offering a choice of two starters.

Ackee and salt fish puff,

salted cod, and a Jamaican fruit called ackee

are cooked in a spicy pepper and tomato sauce

and served in a puff pastry case.

The other option is chicken and callaloo tart,

a short crust pastry case filled with chicken, onions and callaloo,

a leaf vegetable a bit like spinach, served with a small side salad.

The ackee salt fish puff I had to do, because ackee and salt fish

is Jamaica's national dish, and I have been practicing my puff pastry,

so I thought I would throw that one in.

For the chicken and callaloo tart,

I had no idea, so I just made it up on the spot.

I love Caribbean food

and I think this is a really tough menu to try and beat.

Six hours before the diners arrive, Kiera began making pastry

for the tarts of chicken with callaloo,

Jamaica's answer to spinach.

I usually make my own pastry.

Why buy something if you can make it?

I'd feel like a bit of a cop-out.

Kiera seemed cool and collected, as did the rest of her team.

At the moment it seems to be doing all right.

I'm not stressed out yet. Give it time though.

Something will kick in.

The tomato.

For them I'm going to flake the salt fish.

Well this is going to go for the ackee and salt fish.

The salt cod for the other starter had been soaking overnight

and just needed flaking.

Just kind of crushing it and it just sort of breaks up nicely.

I like to think that with Caribbean food it's not just the food.

When you're tasting the food, you're tasting the culture.

You think about the beaches, you think about the night life.

You think about the music, the legends.

There's so much I think that is behind Caribbean food.

I think that should be good.

The flaked cod was added to onions, pepper and tomatoes and left to simmer.

The menu - superb.

Can't wait. Absolutely can't wait.

Don't know what to go for because I like it all.

Lots of stuff I haven't tried so I'm looking forward to trying the new stuff.

Oh my gosh, I can't to serve.

Because there's so much mess.

Tidy up, tidy up, tidy up.

With Kiera's kitchen in a bit of a state,

Ashley is left on her own out front.

But it's all right,

as she has devised a complex ordering system to make things easier.

What am I taking for your starter?

I'll have the chicken and callaloo tart, I think.

For your starter you wanted the chicken tart? OK.

And then for your main?

No, sorry, ignore me. I'm confusing myself.

We'll give it a whirl. Sorry.

You know what? It goes chicken tart,

ackee, chicken tart, ackee, ackee chicken tart, chicken...

OK, I will just show you. Carry on.

You know, I have done this before!

-Apparently.

-I was going to say that...

-Pardon?

-Apparently!

-Do you know what?

I'm not feeling the love anymore.

I'm feeling a bit hurt.

Stop it. Behave yourself, woman.

-The bossiness is coming out now.

Out in the restaurant the guests aren't feeling the love.

They're just feeling hungry.

There was, she was spending too much time in the kitchen.

And they didn't really care about what was going on with us lot.

They asked if everything was OK but it was a very general thing

and they kind of walked out before they got much of an answer, anyway.

Now, this is wicked. I love this.

-You've got to do it before the food goes out.

-I know.

It looks good, K.

It may look good, but the diners haven't seen it yet

and their 25-minute wait is quite long enough.

-Lovely.

-Gently! Gently.

Take two at a time because I don't want you to fall down and hurt yourself.

I'm trying to do it daintily but it's just not working.

It's nice and short though.

-Enjoy!

-Thank you.

I'd not tried anything like that before.

The taste of the fish was delicious.

I felt it lacked something, not sure what.

Perhaps something that could have replaced the salad

because it was just standard lettuce salad.

I had salt fish and ackee.

It was very nice. But I would have preferred a little bit bigger

and probably a bit of sauce of dressing on it. It was a bit dry.

At the first cut, everything fell apart,

but it's really tasted superb. I was surprised.

-Pleasantly surprised.

-I had the chicken and callaloo tart.

It was very dry but I thought the filling tasted delicious,

the pastry was well made.

You got the chicken every now and then.

You got a little zing of chicken and that was really good.

But the callaloo tasted great. Fantastic.

One guy just said, "That went quick."

And another was like, "That was beautiful."

Kiera's had a dressing-down for not having enough

dressing on her salt fish and ackee puffs,

and John's had a drubbing for his rubbery, dry scallops.

If only he'd remembered the eggs,

they might just have saved his black pudding from being so dry.

So it's a real call to arms as we head into the mains.

John's diners get a hefty choice of loin of lamb

stuffed with, wait for it, yet more black pudding,

caramelised apple, and a potato and swede mash known as clapshot,

parsnip streamers and spinach puree.

Or salmon on yet more leeks with yet more ginger and cream

and orange butter sauce, seasonal veg and home-grown potatoes.

With my main dish

I am determined that people should try my black pudding.

I think that black pudding and lamb is an absolute marriage made in heaven.

Black pudding again?

No. The lamb sounds good.

The veg definitely sounds good.

Leeks and ginger again - why?

Good question. Why, John?

I am using quite a lot of black pudding in my dishes.

It's not going to be overpowering.

It's going to be something that's going to be quite nice.

I'm hoping that folks will just enjoy eating the black pudding.

Well, let's hope they do.

At 4:30pm he was slicing up more of his beloved black pudding,

before blending it with chicken and eggs to form a pate.

John split the lamb, spread the pate and tied it up with string, ready to be baked closer to service.

I just enjoy cooking.

It's one of the releases and one of the passions that I have.

The lamb will be served with potato and swede mash called clapshot

and while John is busy with the tatties,

Andy's mission is the orange butter sauce.

Zest of a full orange in there

and we've got the 300 or 400 ml of fish stock.

So that's the juice and zest of the orange, just on a low heat.

No, get it boiling first, mate, you need to reduce that down.

And when you come to do the sauce,

warm it up and serve it with the salmon.

-Because it won't take a minute.

-No, it won't. Been working.

We're getting there. The bulk of the work's done. The hardest part's done.

So, you know, looking fairly good.

7:30pm and the orders are in

but some things are beginning to repeat on the customers.

Stuffed with black pudding?

It sounds all very good but we've got a starter with black pudding

and a main course with black pudding,

a starter with leeks and ginger and a main course with leeks and ginger.

I had leeks and ginger in the sort of starter but I didn't taste much of the ginger.

I'm hoping that I'll get more of that ginger flavour coming through

-in the main course.

Oh, dear. I hope nothing else puts him in the firing line.

The lovely trick with salmon is to quickly fry it in some butter

and then once it's done that, into the oven, finished off.

And that's it - beautiful.

That's simple enough. Fry it in the butter and add the orange sauce.

Speaking of which...

Trying to tidy up, Andy's tipped the sauce away.

But in the immortal words of Corporal Jones, don't panic!

Just, we'll forget the orange sauce. Hang on.

-We'll use that saucepan.

-OK.

-I thought that was finished, that meat.

-OK, no worries.

This is a butter sauce.

And I'm going to add a bit of fish stock to it and a little bit of orange juice.

Sergeant John takes evasive action in the face of hostile tidying

and quickly takes command of the situation.

What I'm going to do is, just quickly,

add a little bit of fish stock to it

and then we'll test and taste and see if it does need any orange.

Well, the sauce was put right by the tap which normally means throw away.

He's blaming everybody else except himself.

I'd keep quiet if I were you, Andy.

And as the salmon's ready and so is the lamb,

I'd commence Operation Plate Up.

Excellent!

The new sauce quickly goes on the salmon before Andy gets a chance to throw it away.

Nice, a little bit sharp. It will go nice with the salmon, that will.

There's the potato and swede clapshot to go with the lamb.

It's a new one on me. Anyone else heard of it?

Clapshot?

Never had that before,

so I'm quite intrigued to taste that with the lamb.

Well, when I knew what clapshot was,

but if you was somebody that didn't know what clapshot was,

you would think it was a disease, wouldn't you?

Sorry!

Well, if it was a disease, it would probably be sleeping sickness

judging by how long they've all had to wait.

There's a 40 minute wait between the starter and the main course.

There was no explanation given to us.

Is yours hot?

Ours is hot in the middle. Cold round the edge.

Excuse me? Is there any vegetables?

Unfortunately not, no.

It does say "home-grown seasonal vegetables" on the menu.

But I'm starting to wonder when John last read it.

Is yours as greasy as mine?

Probably, I'm just not noticing it.

Mine is absolutely swimming in it.

That is just grease.

I didn't enjoy that either.

The salmon had loads of bones in it still.

I think there was a butter sauce.

-It looked as though the sauce had curdled.

-Salmon was quite enjoyable.

Nice flavour. Would have been enough without the vegetables

but when you think you are getting the vegetables

and you don't get them, it was just not quite the same.

Oh dear. Thankfully John in the kitchen has no idea what's being said.

Hopefully the plates will come back empty.

We'll see. Will have to wait and see, I suppose.

Yeah. Hard work, but I'm getting there.

Maybe the lamb with the black pudding stuffing

will turn out to be his secret weapon.

The lamb's too well cooked.

Having black pudding as part of your dishes is not a problem for me

because I enjoy black pudding.

It was nice. It was enjoyable.

I've had a lamb before. What I found was the plate was very cold.

The mash was very cold.

The liquid, the sauce, whatever you want to call it,

my first impressions was

that it was possibly the blood that was coming out of the lamb.

I don't mind paying for good food.

I really don't. But I found the potato and swede a bit too chompy.

But it's not quite chompy enough

as plenty of it ends up back in the kitchen.

Though John is putting on a brave face.

The food's gone down well.

Well pleased with it. Yeah, happy.

Chuffed.

I just hope they appreciate what we've done tonight. That's all.

Aaw, bless!

Back at Kiera's restaurant, the diners are ready for the main course - but are the staff?

That's the first table.

Can't we start with this table?

-I just need to plate them up.

-Carry on.

Kiera is offering some Caribbean classics.

She's serving curried goat slow-cooked in onions and garlic

with plenty of spices.

The other dish is brown stewed chicken casserole.

Chicken pieces and potato simmered in a rich gravy.

And to accompany both, a number of options.

There's coconut rice, coleslaw, and a yam and vegetable medley,

known as hard food.

That's an awful lot to keep track of.

The curry goat for me is an absolute must.

It's my favourite dish and it's almost like a family heirloom

because my nan made it.

She taught my dad to make it, and he's taught me to make it.

I really like the sound of curried goat. Never tried it.

And I haven't got a clue what hard food is.

Mid-morning and Kiera's started to prepare the goat curry.

Everybody loves a good curry at the end of the day.

So I think, hopefully, this should go down quite well this evening.

I wish I'd worn my high heels now.

I can't even see into my pot with my sandals.

Nice and flavoursome.

Full of colour.

And it's made with love. What can I say?

It's getting that nice little bit of gravy down there at the bottom.

That's all kind of consistency that I want

when it's finished.

The curry will be left to simmer for two hours.

It's a mixture of onions, peppers, thyme and garlic.

Then Kiera can get on with preparing the hard food -

a Caribbean staple, with classics like yam,

green banana and sweet potato.

After that one, just do one more?

I didn't want to have to do that funny-looking one.

That's the one I want you to do!

I'm just peeling, well, not peeling, just scoring the green bananas

because they're really hard to peel,

so the way that you peel them is, you score them and you leave them to soak in boiling water

until they are black, and then the skin comes off really easily.

I've always enjoyed cooking.

I've always wanted to pursue, you know, a career in cooking,

owning my own restaurant, that sort of thing.

And I think that I could,

and I feel that with the right staff and the right team,

anything's possible.

Not sure whether that's a compliment or a plea for new staff.

Anyway, at 7:30pm, her current waitress, Ashley,

takes the orders for the mains and Kiera slowly starts plating up.

Ugh, that looks terrible.

I'm just doing my mains at the moment.

I've had equal amounts of both starters and both mains, actually.

God, this is a disaster, an absolute disaster, this.

Once again, Kiera is spending a long time on preparation

and Ashley has spotted another potential problem.

In the kitchen we need it to go little bit quicker

otherwise the food's going to cool down

and we do have some critical customers on our second table

who are going to comment on whatever's wrong.

They are not shy at all.

I know I'm taking long and I'm trying, but the quicker I do it,

the messier it gets and I'm not into the mess.

I'd rather do it slowly so it looks how I want it to look.

But I know that the food gets cold.

So, cold and neat or hot and messy. I know which I'd go for.

Put more gravy just on the meat.

That's right, yeah?

Everything's a bit stressed out.

Just trying to get the food out before it all goes cold.

But everything's going so far so good.

I'm having fun so I don't really mind waiting.

Let's hope the fun feeling is contagious when those mains eventually hit the tables.

Brown chicken and rice, coleslaw and salad.

Yours was the Brown stewed chicken, hard food, salad and coleslaw.

And thanks to Ashley's foolproof ordering system,

everyone gets exactly the wrong thing.

Coleslaw and salad.

But I think at least one person has already made her mind up.

Make that two.

It wasn't quite what you'd expect from a restaurant.

It was delicious, it was homey, hearty, honest food.

The kind of food you'd eat in a bowl

with a fork in front of the television.

On a winter's night.

The stew was lovely.

But wasn't restaurant food.

The coconut rice I had served with the curry goat, it was delicious.

-It's got to be the best rice I've ever tasted.

-Absolutely, yeah.

I'd like to try that again at home. I'd like to make that myself.

High praise indeed -

but what about those critics who know exactly what they want?

-That looks like the salad. But she said yam.

-Not got as much pepper as I thought it would.

The Caribbean food that I've had tonight,

compared to what I grew up on, just doesn't compare.

I didn't think it was as good

as it could have been.

A tiny piece, a very, very tiny piece of chicken.

The plantain, the bananas, were very hard.

We were told it was yam but obviously it wasn't yam.

It tasted to me like cassava.

Although I know I'm a big girl, I could say that

after the starter and the main course, I'm still hungry!

Oh dear. Kiera's guests seemed rather underwhelmed.

Not zingy enough. Cold food.

Not as good as it could be. And John came in for some stick, too.

What a shame he forgot the seasonal veg. It could have saved the day.

I really hope they have both got

something really special lined up for desserts.

At least at John's they won't be

getting the same ingredients again - will they?

Desserts - I'm expecting chocolate gateau with black pudding

and hazelnut cream with ginger as well.

What the diners are really getting is gateau chocolat chaud,

an individual melted chocolate pudding

served with a tasty raspberry coulis.

The other option is hazelnut torte

with a mascarpone and bramble coulis filling,

served with blackcurrant sorbet.

The chocolate I think is absolutely beautiful. All my family love it.

And I really wanted to show off the fruit that I grow with the blackcurrant and the raspberries.

The chocolate gateau sounds yummy and the hazelnut torte

also sounds good but I don't think it quite goes with the sorbet.

At 1500 hours - that's 3 o'clock to you and me -

John had his right hand man, Andy,

cracking into the family favourite chocolate gateau.

Started with the chocolate and melted the butter into the chocolate

-and that's the eggs that you whisked, John.

-Yeah.

The chocolate is a bang on dessert.

And especially a melting chocolate pot.

When you break open the chocolate in the middle

it all just runs out and oozes out. Beautiful.

The luxurious mix is poured into individual moulds and then chilled the fridge prior to cooking.

They will be served with a raspberry coulis and Private Debbie has the fun of sieving the berries.

But of course head chef John gets the final say.

That's nice. That's lovely.

Right, that can go into the fridge.

The other filling is mascarpone cheese which gets a short of blackcurrant cassis.

Go on, bit more. Go on, go on, go on.

And a sprinkling of icing sugar.

This is the torte.

This is the cement that holds everything together.

Cement? I don't think even Heston Blumenthal uses that ingredient!

The final task is to make the hazelnut meringues and John's using the freshest of eggs.

All the eggs came from my sister's chickens this morning.

Whisked egg whites get the edition of nibbed hazelnuts.

Then, the mix is spread out, ready to bake.

These are supposed to be six-inch discs, but...

That's a very disappointing six inches, John!

Can I have the gateau please?

Can we have one hazelnut and one gateau, please?

The orders for dessert are in.

Six hazelnut, four gateaux.

-Those meringues are looking a bit limp.

-Think I used too much sugar.

I've got a feeling I put too much sugar in and that's the reason why.

I think that's the reason but I'm not sure.

Let's hope the chocolate pots have risen to the occasion.

Brilliant.

Ah, damn! It's broken, Debs.

A drizzle of raspberry coulis and then the puddings are sent out

to some very discerning customers.

I was quite worried about the sorbet. I didn't think it would set but it's set perfectly.

And it's lovely and smooth, just like the sorbet should be.

-That is nice. I quite like that.

-Sharp, isn't it?

It's nice and refreshing.

It's a sorbet - that's why.

I knew the pudding would be worth waiting for. Raspberry coulis.

Want a little bit more?

Please. Can I have that bit?

No, you can have a little more cake or some coulis!

Very enjoyable.

I'd say it was the best course of the evening so far.

And what about the chocolate pot?

This is a bit chewy for me. Is it chewy?

Lovely. This is delicious.

-That is a sensation.

-That is really nice.

Certainly, without a doubt,

that's the best course I've had this evening. Very enjoyable.

Enjoyed that very much.

The gateau was chocolate dream delight.

An Ann Summers chocolate dessert painted all over you! Sorry!

OK, I think she enjoyed it.

John's fancy puds may have pushed him over the top

but what's Kiera got lined up?

Well, she's put in all her faith in that old Caribbean favourite, rum.

She's serving home-made rum cake with rum flavoured cream.

The other choice is pancakes with rum flavoured bananas and cream.

Quite what you are supposed to do if you don't like rum, I don't know.

The rum cake is very traditional at Christmas in the West Indies.

So, you know, rum, it reminds me of the Caribbean. It's just perfect.

A perfect reminder.

I'd really like to try the pancakes.

I think it's a very brave thing to do.

Kiera started on the rum cake in the morning.

Rum cake, very traditional,

very West Indian,

and funnily enough, very Christmassy.

In our family we only ever have rum cake at Christmas.

I'm just kind of mushing this all together

and it's giving me arm ache already.

The cake is made with flour, butter, eggs, dark brown sugar,

mixed fruit, cinnamon, nutmeg,

vanilla, ginger, lots of cherries and there was one other thing.

Now, what was it?

Rum?

A splash?

I'm doing it like I'm measuring it and I'm just really not.

Just a splash.

And I've had these raisins soaking in some alcohol.

They smell actually quite strong.

Think there's probably some rum,

some more port.

That should be all right.

Quite a low-ish heat.

Just finishing that.

Ouch. Not to burn myself.

It's nearly 10 o'clock

and Kiera is busting some strange moves in her kitchen

with a giant wooden spoon.

Just melted out some sugar and some water for the spun sugar.

You have to just let the sugar glide off the spoon and drizzle.

It is absolutely piping hot and it is going all over my kitchen floor.

I've put the newspaper down just to make sure that my mother doesn't murder me.

I've got a little nest here which will sit nicely

on top of the pancakes.

I've just put the pancake mix that we've made up into the pan.

Frying it until its golden, really.

When they're ready, Kiera cuts them into shape to make a tower.

I want them to sit on the top, innit, so they don't need to...

-What time is it?

-Late.

This is going so slapdash.

I'm not liking this, what I'm seeing.

No, hold on a second.

Ice-cream.

OK. Go on.

At 10:15pm, nearly four hours after they arrive,

the diners finally get their puddings.

This is your pancake. Enjoy.

It was generally nice but the pancakes probably were a bit too stodgy

and the bananas, I couldn't taste the rum very much.

But as an overall dessert, it was OK.

"OK", and "nice"

probably wasn't what Kiera was hoping for.

For dessert I had the pancakes.

I was disappointed really, it wasn't anything special.

But I did eat it, though, so...

But there wasn't much taste.

So, what about the rum cake?

I can attest to the fact that that is wicked rum cake.

Really, really moist. Pretty rummy.

And most importantly what about Kiera's particularly hard to please customers?

For dessert I had the rum cake.

I found it a little bit too heavy,

so I only really ate half of it.

But what I did eat was all right.

Yes, the pancakes seemed to be very stodgy.

The bananas weren't very nice.

The ice-cream was like cheap ice-cream.

But the decoration on the top, which was the spun sugar, was really nice.

A much better strike rate for John and mixed reviews for Kiera

but there's now nothing more that either of our cooks can do.

It's up to their diners to decide how much or how little

they think their restaurant experience has been worth.

And neither of our cooks knows how much that might be.

John's only spent £64 on his instant restaurant,

so he stands a good chance of making a profit.

But will he pay the price for all that black pudding?

The quality of the food was OK.

It was restaurant standard. I think they did a grand job.

The service wasn't that great.

The food wasn't that great apart from the dessert but mostly I paid for the company and the dessert.

I didn't enjoy the start or the main course but the dessert was worth.

Yeah, it was gorgeous.

But, bless him, he stayed chipper to the end.

I think it's gone really well tonight.

I'm well impressed. I know we had a couple of hiccups with the food

but all in all, in general, it's gone really nice.

And what about Kiera's Caribbean experience?

She must take three times as much as John just to break even.

So has she done enough to win over her diners?

The pudding pulled it back. Both puddings absolutely delicious.

The main course, if I'd been in a proper restaurant,

-I would have sent it back. It was cold.

Overall, I didn't enjoy the meal very well.

I've had a really nice evening.

The company was very good indeed.

The food was so-so.

At the end of the day, the whole programme's about profit.

Do you think we've made any?

-Nah!

-Nah!

John, Kiera.

An amazing night.

An incredible night? Or a nightmare?

-How was it for you, Kiera?

-It was fantastic.

I loved every minute of it.

Really? Nothing you didn't enjoy?

Not really, no.

-I loved the experience.

-Had you ever cooked for that many people before?

Never. I think I've cooked for maybe six,

-but 10 was definitely a push for me.

-And how are your team?

Fabulous. I couldn't have asked for better assistants, really.

I knew they would be good because they at great in real life. Knew it would be good.

-John, how are you?

-Fine, thank you.

What is it about you, black pudding and ginger?

Ooh, lovely!

Did it ever occur to you some people might not like black pudding?

I'm forcing it on the world, I'm afraid.

Whether they like it or not. It's something I think is beautiful.

-How was the night for you?

-Excellent. Really good night.

For myself personally I found it very hard work.

And so did my friends helping me.

And come the end of the night, we was absolutely shattered.

I'm sure you're both dying to hear whether you made any money at all.

-Yes.

-OK.

Kiera. You spent £161.

And your diners donated...

-155.

-Ah!

So, you owe someone six quid.

But it's not me, so don't worry!

OK, John, you spent - listen to how the boys do it - 64 quid.

That's all. And your diners donated 129,

so you made a profit of 65.

-Excellent.

-So there you go. That's for you.

-Thank you very much.

-Thank you.

-Look - open-mouthed.

She can't believe it. She's probably not going to get over it.

Thank you both very much. And thank you for watching Instant Restaurant.

I'll see you next time.

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