Episode 2 The Great Comic Relief Bake Off

The Bake Off tent is up...

..the squirrels are brushed up...

..and a new batch of well-known personalities are about to

lay their baking skills bare in aid of Comic Relief.

Actor Warwick Davis, whose celebrated career includes

BBC2's Life's Too Short.

My chance to give them something.

That's £25, please.

I've worked on all sorts of big productions in the past -

Star Wars, Harry Potter.

I've worked with big names in the entertainment industry.

None of them give me the fear

and trepidation that I've got for this today.

Oh, God!

Argh!

Presenter Andy Akinwolere,

who's faced his fair share of challenges whilst on Blue Peter.

I've done a lot of action and adrenaline-driven stuff.

When it comes to baking, I'm completely out of my comfort zone.

If I got good comments from Mary and Paul, I'll be digging into

my pockets for Comic Relief because that is an achievement on its own.

I'd, oh... hmm.

Don't do that, "Hmm!"

-I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

-You keep doing that, "Hmm."

Duncan Bannatyne, who's used to judging others on Dragons' Den.

I sort of regret agreeing to do it

but I think I've got to do something

and so this is the easiest option.

Bake blind. What does that mean?

And adventurer and presenter of BBC2's Indian Ocean, Simon Reeve.

This is one of the most beautiful...

environments I can ever remember being in.

I've been to some of the poorest places on the planet

so I know how much Comic Relief matters.

I really hope that people will get baking,

get supporting Comic Relief and get donating!

There, there. Bake. Bake well.

Their baking abilities are about to be scrutinised in a bid

to inspire you to get baking for Comic Relief.

And Lorraine Pascale is in Ghana,

showing us how the money raised really does make a difference.

Oh, they look good.

But who will stand up to the steely eyes of Paul Hollywood...

The texture is appalling.

..and the impeccable taste of Mary Berry...

Do you know, that's really good?

Drum roll, please.

..and claim tonight's title of Comic Relief Star Baker?

Warwick, Andy, Simon and Duncan

are about to show Paul and Mary the level of their baking skills

with a tried and tested recipe in the Signature Challenge.

Bakers, welcome to the Comic Relief Bake Off tent.

So we're going to be asking you today to bake 18 iced biscuits.

It's completely up to you -

the type, the flavour of the biscuit is your choice

but what Berry and Hollywood will be keeping their eagle eye on

is the neatness of the icing as well as the creative flair

that you show in this Signature Bake.

You've got one and a half hours so on your marks, get set,

bake for Comic Relief.

If you want to bake for Comic Relief, biscuits are a good place to start.

Their simple ingredients and the fact that you can bake several

at once make them ideal for even the most inexperienced baker.

-DUNCAN:

-How do you zero the timer?

-SIMON:

-Your scales.

Your scales. So you put that on that? Now how do you zero it?

Press the power button and it should find it.

Oh, right, OK. Lovely. Thank you very much.

I'm looking for 18 even-shaped biscuits.

They should be of a good texture, good colour

but, most important of all, they've got to have a really good

flavour and that icing must complement the biscuit.

It's all about breaking down your recipe into easy, manageable chunks.

Read the recipe, understand what we want in that time and get it done.

I'm making some sort of Scandinavian-type biscuits in honour of

my wife who's half Scandi.

They've got a secret ingredient in them -

(cinnamon.)

I'm not going for subtle flavours here.

I'm going for a biscuit that packs a punch.

Simon describes himself as a pre-novice baker so his

cinnamon and vanilla biscuits iced with a Comic Relief red nose

are the first thing he's baked in decades.

-How are you going to finish them?

-Have you got any advice?

I'm going to do some icing.

I practised the biscuits but not the icing.

Have you ever used a piping bag before?

-When I was in single figures, yes.

-Good luck, Simon.

How far would you suggest?

-We're not telling you.

-Go on.

We're not telling you. No!

Which nozzle are you going to use?

-Which nozzle?

-Yeah.

-Is that not the nozzle?

-Oh, this is useless. Come on, Mary, let's go.

He's trying to put the wind up you. You just go your own way.

Good luck, Simon. Good luck.

This is a handmade nozzle, surely. Foolish me.

'Mary, she's tasted it all, hasn't she?'

I don't think I could ever put an ingredient in this that

she wouldn't have tasted before unless I sort of wanted to,

I don't know, put in some seaweed

but she probably had seaweed biscuits before.

Warwick has more experience cooking than baking so is making

simple orange-flavoured biscuits

but wants to impress with his chocolate and orange icing.

What sort of texture do you want?

Do you want it to snap? Do you want it to break?

Well, the ones that I made as a practice were a bit too thick.

They were very nice but I want to go thinner this time

so I want them to have a little bit of bite to them.

That is where it's very difficult,

when you've got a thin biscuit, to get the bake perfectly.

-It just breaks.

-Cos if they're dark on the outside,

they'll be bitter and if they're not done in the middle they'll be soft

so it is quite tricky if they're thin.

Yeah, you're going cookie or snap?

I'm making a very simple iced biscuit,

simply because I know nothing else to make.

I think, at this stage,

I just want to make the most simplest thing ever.

Andy is lactose intolerant and therefore unable to taste

his cinnamon, ginger and clove-flavoured biscuits

so his method for testing them is unusual.

The last one I made, because I couldn't eat it, to test to see

whether it was crunchy or not was just smacking it on the table

and it broke,

so technically it's got a bit of snap, it's got a bit of a bite.

This is the tricky bit now, is actually the rolling out.

Oh, no! No! No!

The dough's all drying out now.

Throw in a bit more water.

The trick is, not that I'm an expert,

is to not let it get too sticky.

Keep it moist but not too sticky.

Aargh!

That's really sticky.

That's really annoying.

Half a centimetre there.

Nobody gets a ruler out, do they, when they bake? I mean,

I don't know, it's like a dog show, isn't it?

A dog's a dog but when you show a dog it has to stand upright and

not poo and all that stuff.

Just looking at the edge.

OK. I'm going to cut them out.

Simon, Andy and Warwick are sticking with traditional cutters.

But Duncan is trying something slightly different.

We're going to make some biscuits shaped like

ice cream cones using my own handmade thingamajig.

Duncan only started cooking a couple of months ago but is being

ambitious by making delicate poppy seed and golden syrup biscuits

topped with intricate crisscross icing.

This whole recipe is very tricky.

This is the trickiest recipe here today.

These guys are doing easy biscuits, I'm doing difficult biscuits.

They look pretty perfect.

It's actually...

Oh, no, look at that, that's just crumbled up.

Will it save? It couldn't have been my mistake - that's just impossible.

I don't make mistakes, I'm a Dragon.

Let me just think a minute what I'm doing.

Right.

Come on.

Bakers, you've got 18 biscuits to ice in the next 15 minutes.

Ah!

-TIMER BEEPS

-OK. That's the biscuits.

I don't think they're done enough.

Oh, look at that. Golden brown.

Pokeage.

They need a little bit longer.

I'm not sure if they're ready

but I'll put them on a cooling tray and we'll find out.

I don't know! They're supposed to go golden.

Why aren't you going golden?

All I can do is wait.

They nearly are, they just need a couple more minutes.

-I mean, they're browning.

-What do you reckon?

-Do you reckon I should get them out now?

-Oh, I don't know.

What shall I do? Get them out or not?

I don't know, mate.

I never thought this would be a big dilemma in my life.

Do I get biscuits out of an oven?

I must get them out because otherwise there's no biscuits.

"Mary, hello. Look at my lovely wire racks I've made."(!)

OK, now they're coming out.

OK. I'm getting them out because at the end of the day you can't...

-can you die from eating a raw biscuit?

-No.

OK, well that's fine then, we're not worried.

Oh, no. I've left some in the oven.

Oh, my goodness gracious me.

These have been well over-baked.

-Cool down!

-A couple of these aren't going to survive the cut.

Don't, don't mention to anyone.

OK, I could still,

I could still pull this off unless I drop them all...again.

Right. I put them in the fridge.

Oh, no, come on!

Comic Relief bakers, that's five minutes to go. Five minutes.

What I really need is a silicone gun,

like when I'm doing the sealant in the bathroom. I can do that.

This is just unbelievable.

See, this is the bit you shouldn't rush.

I mean, some people bungee jump for an adrenaline rush.

Try baking some biscuits on a television under pressure,

that'll sort you out.

Oh, no! It's so runny, it's breaching the dam.

-Oh, no! No, that stopped. Stop!

-Stop! Stop!

-Stop!

-Stop! Stop! Stop!

-OK, I'm going to flood with a spoon.

I've never done this before, it's very unorthodox but I just, I just love...

I love doing things in a kind of crazy-like way.

Maverick baker, just throwing out the rule book, just going crackers.

I'm just trying to hide all the dodgy ones at the bottom

and be like a pile.

Beautiful. Beautiful!

I think that's right.

Comic Relief bakers, your time is up. Duncan, stop piping, please.

No. I've stopped, I've stopped, I've stopped!

Warwick, they've kept a perfect shape

and you've got a very even bake.

What sort of finish are you looking at? What sort of bite?

I was going for a kind of a crunchy bite,

but then once you get it in, it's moist.

-Crunchy, yet moist?

-You've nailed that, mate.

-I've nailed that, haven't I? Thank you.

Ooh! Ooh, it's a... it has a little bit of a problem.

Right, it's a bit runny. I accept that.

-A little bit runny.

-Wipe it on my apron if you want.

Yes, that would be good, just sort of here. That's right.

Nice thin bake. I mean, the cinnamon gives it its colour.

I think the overall look of the biscuits is terrible.

I think the flavour has got too much cinnamon in for me.

You want a punchy biscuit?

Yeah, but...

the look of that punches you before you've actually even eaten it.

-OK.

-The bake's OK, though, it's got a great texture.

They're beautifully cut out, they're the same thickness...

-and I quite like this fried egg on top.

-Thank you.

I think that the overall flavour isn't bad.

-The texture is appalling...

-Is it really bad?

..Because you've worked that thing to death

and so when you bite it, you sort of...

it bends and then it snaps and to be honest the...

it's like a rubber ball, they probably would bounce.

I love the idea that you've been totally original.

I have never seen biscuits cut with a template to be an ice cream cone.

I love the finish.

OK, the trellis isn't perfect but I think that's rather nice.

I think the bake is a bit inconsistent

because you've got your burnt ones as well.

The actual flavour is fantastic. The texture of those are excellent.

-Good.

-Thanks, Duncan.

-Well done, Duncan. Delicious!

Paul's comments were a bit deep. It's for Comic Relief, mate.

Relax!

I think their criticism was fair,

but that doesn't mean I wanted to hear it.

I was looking for something that I could take away

and build on rather than knocking me down.

He said, I "nailed it". That's good isn't it? That IS good.

It's not a very sort of...

baking term though is it, really?

But I'll take it as a compliment.

I want cooking and baking to be part of my life now.

I think the next Bannatyne books on baking

and cooking are going to be, you know, worldwide.

HE LAUGHS

'The next test for Duncan, Andy, Simon and Warwick

'is the surprise recipe of the Technical Challenge.'

OK, bakers.

This is the challenge that often has you bakers quaking in your boots

because you simply do not know what we're about to hit you

in the face with like a big comedy custard pie.

Now, you probably know this but we like to judge this blind,

so Paul and Mary, please vacate the tent, you pair of little cupcakes.

LAUGHTER

We'll see them shortly.

So, bakers, what we're asking you to do today is a true British classic.

We'd like you please to bake and present a family-sized

Bakewell tart.

HE LAUGHS

So you've got 2½ hours and I'll leave you with

the words, "On your marks, get set, bake for Comic Relief."

'All four have the same recipe and ingredients

'and all four are fledgling pastry makers.'

This seems extremely complicated. Can't we make something very simple?

Well, Mary, the classic Bakewell tart.

Most of them would have eaten it,

but I shouldn't think there's one that has made it.

First of all, they've got to make shortcrust pastry

and they spread the raspberry jam evenly across the bottom

and let's hope they've made the pastry well

because if there's any cracks in it, the liquid will pour out.

Then they have to bake that to be that lovely colour,

not too dark, not too light.

-That really is something else, isn't it?

-It's delicious.

I think they'll find it rather difficult.

I agree. They've probably never even heard of frangipane before.

'The starting point of a Bakewell tart is making the thin pastry case.'

Right, now I'm mixing the flour

and butter with my fingers to create a consistency of fine breadcrumbs.

Seems to be taking quite a long time, but I think I'm doing it right.

It was only a little bit of water, wasn't it?

Two to three tablespoons, because if you do too much...

you're in a mess.

OK, here we go. The moment of truth.

-Does it look like this?

-No, I don't think so.

I'm going to just do a couple of more rolls

because I'm getting nice and thin now.

I've now got to line the pastry case.

I think I do it like this.

I mean, it's OK saying, "Use to line the flan tin".

How do you get this into the flan tin? I take it it's something like this.

Oh, it's very delicate.

Back of hands, lay it in.

Settle it in. Settle it in.

Settle it in. Tease it.

Coax it. It's your friend.

All right, OK, so I'm going to do my favourite bit now.

You're supposed to pick it up and look all chef...Oh, my God!

Nobody told me the bottom of this thing came out!

All right, you can't trick me. I'm going to just carry on...

regardless.

OK, here goes.

Slicing. So I'm letting the tin just slice through this now.

Ha-ha, look at that... like whipping a dress off a dancer.

I mean, I don't know why I...

that's a weird analogy to give, look at that. I'm happy with that.

Then it says, "Chill for 30 minutes".

I presume that's the pastry and not me.

OK.

'For Duncan, the next instruction is more than a little baffling.'

"Bake blind in oven". "Bake blind"! What does that mean?

"Line the pastry case with foil".

What do you mean by "foil"?

Tin foil?

"Bake blind". What does that mean?

-I imagine...

-Close your eyes?

..You close your eyes and you don't look.

See, I know what that means, "baking blind."

You bake it without any filling in it.

It seals the pastry ,you see, otherwise

if you put all the goopy stuff on top, the pastry can't cook.

-He's just chatting away, look.

-Yeah, because he's relaxed, he's confident,

he knows what he's doing as well, you know?

At the top it says, "No conferring with the other bakers

"during this challenge" but what fun would that be?

"No conferring with the other bakers during this challenge"?!

Will you stop conferring with me?

Please, magic beans, do your job.

-Is this more stressful than acting?

-It's far more stressful, yeah.

Is it? I would be more afraid of the Berry.

I think behind those...kittenish...

I see her and she gives me a little wink and it's lovely.

-Does she?!

-Oh, yeah. I've got a good relationship there.

-All right, what's going on?

-I don't know, but I'm going with it for the advantage of this,

that's fine. If it costs me a meal further down the road, that's fine.

Was it a long, languorous or was it a bit cursory?

It was a, it was a kind of a...

-Ooh!

-..Like that.

-With a smile?

-Yeah, there was a little glint there. Yeah.

-I think you're in there, Warwick.

-Just a long... what's a long wink?

-Well...

-That's a twitch. That wasn't what it...

-she's not got a twitch.

-No, it's, it's more of a...

Oh, I don't want one of them!

Bakers, you're halfway through your Technical Challenge.

Halfway through.

I've got a lot going on here on this side, that's quite raised

but this side here, it's actually a lot shorter, so when I put the centre bit in,

the problem is, if it rises or whatever, it might spill over.

COUNTER BEEPS

Another five minutes.

'The ground almonds, butter, sugar and eggs of a frangipane

'should be heated until it's thick but runny enough to pour.'

To be honest, I haven't got a clue but I imagine, yes, I could probably

over-mix it, add air bubbles into it or something, so it's mixed,

I should have the confidence just to leave it, I suppose.

One tablespoon of raspberry jam seems...

doesn't seem adequate to me...

but I think will stick with the instructions.

I would normally have just put half a tin in, I would have thought.

I'd go for slightly more jam, to be honest but...

again, Mary knows what this should look like,

if she cuts a cross section of this and the jam's too thick,

she'll know that that's not what it should look like.

I just hope I've put the right amount in,

cos you kind of want that to come through.

'Getting the right ratio of filling to pastry base is crucial.'

It feels like there's too much of it, as well.

Oh, of course, the risk is all of the jam underneath

will have just been...

pushed to one side. Oh, my goodness, what have I done?!

Trying to cover all the corners but I don't want to put too much on this side

because I know it's going to spread

so I'm trying to compensate for the fact that I've got quite a shallow base. Right. There we go.

Sprinkle over the flaked almonds.

Seems a lot of almonds.

"Bake well," sweet tart.

Go on, in you go.

Don't drop it.

HE GROANS

Settling nicely.

TIMER BEEPS

Bake for about 35...oh, bugger!

No almonds.

-HE GIGGLES

-Oh, dear.

See, how ever careful you are... ow!

You're always doing something wrong in cooking.

See, I don't know whether...

I feel like I'm starting to do crazy paving here with this.

I don't know whether you should be this precise or just chuck it on.

Anyone got any tweezers?

'Having never made a Bakewell tart before, all four of them are

'relying on gut instinct to tell when it's perfectly baked.'

Is that supposed to be soft?

How long has it been for? 35?

-Yeah.

-What's the Bannatyne waters telling you to do?

-Put it back in.

-Put it back in, OK.

-How long for?

-I've no idea.

Oh, look at that. See how easy it comes out? Oh, no!

It was all going so well.

Comic Relief bakers,

you have five minutes left in the land of Bakewell.

Five minutes.

OK, the moment of truth for me.

Oh, it's looking possible... don't drop it. Don't drop it.

Pretty good.

Ooh! Oh, I think that looks a bit Bakewelly.

Generally...it makes you salivate, looking at that.

Relax. Relax. Relax. Relax.

Relax. Relax. Relax.

I don't know what it's like in the middle, but it looks evenly brown.

I'm quite happy with that.

"Once the tart has exited the oven, pipe the icing over the top,

"giving an informal zigzag effect".

Informal zigzag.

Informal zigzag.

This is ridiculous, though, isn't it?

Leave it alone now, Davis.

Leave it alone.

I probably shouldn't have done that extra bit.

Think I've ruined it.

-Do you know what shape you're going to do?

-Can I use your hand?

-Yes.

How does that feel?

Ooh, it's rather cool.

Shall I... can I go up your sleeve?

-I feel quite stressed at this moment.

-Do you?

-Yeah, I really do.

-Do you?

-Yeah, I'm about to ice a Bakewell tart.

It's good.

Ah! It's going off the edge.

-No, it's all right.

-Yeah?

-Oceania.

-I'm running out.

Oh, my God! Am I going to make it? Cos I'm running out of icing,

I'm getting to the end of the bag. This is potential for disaster.

I've got some on my hand, don't worry.

-Can I put it back in the bag?

-You can always scrape it off...

Ooh!

-But it's...

-No, no.

More should be done, surely.

No, no, no. More is not more.

-Less is more.

-Don't you feel there's a bit of icing lacking on the front?

-Stop it!

-OK.

-Stop.

Do you want me to ice your other hand?

OK, Comic Relief bakers, that's one minute left.

One minute left on these Bakewells.

Whoa!

Oh, God!

Rrrgh!

Voila!

OK, bakers, that's it.

Time, please, to come to the gingham altar

and place your tart in front of your photograph. Thank you.

Wow! You're supposed to have not ever done anything like this,

you're amateurs. Well done.

Right. We'll start with this one. If I try and...

See that, Mary?

I think that's jolly good.

It really is.

Let's cut into this. It actually looks quite nice.

The pastry's good, it's nice and thin,

there's a good layer of jam which has all come to the side

but it needed to be smoothed out a bit in the middle.

I think the pastry is beautifully done, it's very thin.

The flavours are excellent. That's a nice one, that one.

Let's have a look at this one. I like that effect on the top.

Hmm. Higgledy-piggledy, I'd call it.

LAUGHTER

Good bake underneath, although...

..the pastry has split on the side, see?

Hmm, but it's held together and it hasn't dripped out.

This has got a nicer layer of frangipane in this one.

It's a very good pastry.

Good filling.

It is a little broken,

we haven't got a very good finish on the edge of the pastry there.

This...

It's nice, it looks quite thin.

But all the filling's in there

and it hasn't come over the top.

It's nice, neat, thin pastry.

That's nice and thin.

That tastes absolutely lovely.

Very good pastry all the way around the outside.

You can see they're serrated on the ends

whereas these, they've lost it slightly.

-This has been filled perfectly.

-Absolutely perfectly.

All right, let's move on to the last one, shall we?

Now, this one's had a few issues here, the cracking on the top.

Have you heard about issues before?

Good bake.

Not very even. It's spilled out.

See the jam spilling out around the side there, Mary?

Not as much filling in this one...

..but...

very crispy base, very thin.

Can you see it's got a rather thicker layer of jam

and that's why, if jam bubbles out over the side,

it sticks to the edge of the pastry.

More like jam tart than almond.

-Oh, that's nice.

-But overall, actually, I'm impressed.

-Congratulations. Well done.

-Yeah, I think you've done well.

Paul and Mary will rank the Bakewell tarts from worst to best.

It's all part of it, mate.

In fourth place....

Hey.

It's just flowing over a little bit

and the jam also has bubbled through.

Number three is this one.

It was a great pastry and a good eat

but that pastry was just a little bit too thick.

So number two is here.

-Whose is this one?

-Mine.

It was a lovely flavour.

It's a little bit thinner and it was a little bit over-baked on the side.

So it obviously leaves number one.

-Warwick.

-Thank you.

Well done indeed. That is a very, very good...

Really beaut, a real beaut. It is perfection.

HE MOUTHS

I thought I made a nice little Bakewell,

but the judges put me last!

I would not have said at the beginning of today

I could have made a Bakewell tart,

followed the recipe and done it just like that.

I feel quite buoyed up by that. It was fun to do,

I enjoyed it and the end result was appreciated, I think.

It's exciting going in tomorrow

knowing that I have a kind of a win under my belt, as it were

but who knows? It's all to play for, I think

because we're all wanting to win now.

Now, our four bakers may be in the throes

of one of the toughest baking battles of their lives

but the aim is simple -

to help chance the lives of people in Africa and those here at home

and this is one of the projects that by getting involved, you can help.

In Ghana, Comic Relief supports a whole range of projects

and some of them involve baking

and I'm here to see how the money you raise is changing lives.

-Again.

-CHILDREN: Qualities of good drinking water...

Supported by Comic Relief,

the Grace School in Zuarungu was set up by Afrikids.

-Five?

-Yes!

They provide vulnerable children from some of the poorest communities

with an education and a safe place

from what could be an alternative life on the streets.

There are kids who have never, there are even adults

who have never been to school.

They've never, ever stepped into a classroom.

So education is seen as one of the alternatives

out of extreme levels of poverty in our part of the world.

And no-one knows that better than 14-year-old Maxwell.

Along with hundreds of children,

he worked every day at the busy bus depot.

Many of these children have grown up without guidance or protection

and the only childhood they have known has been on the streets.

The children wait in hope of lorries coming in,

working manual labour unloading their heavy goods

in a desperate attempt to make a living.

-It was hard.

-Yeah?

Yeah, I don't also like it.

-You wouldn't want to work here any more?

-No.

And by night, it's a dangerous place

for the children who call this place home.

So where are your parents?

Upper East.

-Upper East.

-Yeah? Is that far away?

-Yes.

-Yeah.

So you're here by yourself, on your own?

-Yes.

-Yes.

-Yes?

'Separated from their parents'

and sleeping in wrecks of cars, old boxes or whatever they can find,

these children often work overnight,

making it impossible to get an education.

But with your help, there is a way out.

By donating money to Comic Relief

we can work to get these children off the streets and into school.

For the lucky ones,

not only are they learning maths, English and sciences

but baking is on the curriculum too.

You can break the eggs here.

And it's only possible

because the school has invested in their very first oven.

This oven is fabulous. They've obviously got

the little stove there which we've all kind of seen camping,

that kind of thing, but then there's this box

where they put the cakes inside and will heat on top

and they bake cakes that way.

By going to the Grace School,

the children have the prospect of a different future.

It's very inspiring.

We have kids here who never thought they could be anything

who now are full of confidence

and say, "I want to be a nurse, I want to be a doctor".

The money you gave last Red Nose Day

has supported these children to get an education, but this year,

£5 could provide exercise books for five street children,

giving them one of the essential tools they need

to go to school. All you have to do is pick up the phone

and text the word BAKE to 70005.

Texts cost £5 plus your standard network message charge

and £5 goes straight to Comic Relief.

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Every penny really does make a difference.

For Warwick, Andy, Duncan and Simon, this is the final challenge

and it's all about the showmanship.

You all came back. It's a good sign.

Now, I'm not going to lie to you.

This is the biggie, OK?

This is the Showstopper Challenge,

after which one of you will be able to claim the illustrious title

"Comic Relief Star Baker."

Now, for the Showstopper Challenge, Mary and Paul would like you all

to produce what should be at the centre of any good French spread,

the gateau, which basically means "cake" in English, obviously,

but we want to make it sound more sophisticated and difficult anyway.

Now, this gateau should have at least three layers

and more important than that,

it's got to have the wow factor

or as they say in France, "ze wow facteur".

LAUGHTER

You have three-and-a-half hours on this (FRENCH ACCENT) "challenge"

before you are "juge" by Mary and Paul,

so on your marks - sur vos marks,

get set - preparez-vous,

allez-y - bake.

A gateau is a bit frightening.

We're expecting something spectacular.

It's got to be neat but attractive.

They've had problems already with icing,

so let's hope they've mastered it

and that we're going to get a really good result.

Simplicity is the key to a great-looking cake.

Thin lines, maybe a little bit of chocolate on the top,

don't over-decorate.

Keep it simple, keep it beautiful

and I'm sure they'll do well.

-Hello.

-Good morning, Warwick.

Can you tell us about your showstopper, please?

It's a lemon sponge topped with a mascarpone cream,

a mixture of blackberries and raspberries

with some chocolate sort of decorative features

which I'm going to experiment with.

Warwick is giving his gateau height

by stacking it with three individual baked sponges.

So mascarpone is very, very thick

so your clever idea to put some of the puree in.

That'll run it down and it will spread better.

-Exactly.

-That's a good idea.

-Are you going to ripple it as well?

Ripple it? Is that a technical term that I don't understand?

Rippling, basically you can sort of draw a knife through

if you're going to add puree to it

and it'll sort of have lines of the puree through it as well.

So you're pushing the boat out.

Yeah. Well, it's got to be a showstopper.

It's all very well it being a gobstopper

-but it has to be a showstopper too.

-Good luck, mate.

-Thank you.

So I'm making a choccie, chocolate gateau.

A very chocolate gateau.

I did start calling it a Jakey Cakey Bakey in honour of my son.

Simon's gateau of three layers of chocolate sponges,

filled and covered with chocolate orange ganache,

has yet to be made successfully.

What temperature are you doing? How long do you think it will be?

Well, it's supposed to be in for an hour and a half

but if I put it in for an hour and a half, I'm going to run out of time

so I adjusted the...

I raised temperature, decreased time.

I know that's not ideal

but I have to fit in with the time constraints, frankly, imposed on me.

-You've upped the temperature of the oven to cook it.

-Yeah.

-OK.

Good luck with them, anyway.

Today I'm going to be making a...

I guess a summer fruits gateau

but as we're going with the whole French theme,

it's going to be called a gateau a la Andre.

To ensure he can taste his showstopper,

Andy's three-layered orange flavoured gateau is made with a fatless sponge.

To give it rise, he's whisking his eggs

until they are twice the size.

When I did this at home, I was using a whisk with my hands

and I just couldn't get this amount of volume

and I think that's why my sponge was really, really hard.

I didn't think I'd put enough, as much air into it.

You know what? look at this, this is looking good.

Andy's not the only one attempting this tricky little sponge.

I've made this cake three times now. It's been very successful.

Everybody loves it. Everyone loves my cakes.

If the judges don't love it, there's summat seriously wrong with them.

Yet again, Duncan's being ambitious.

He's making a large four-layered chocolate gateau with eight eggs.

It'll be covered with chocolate ganache

and piped with buttercream rosettes.

So in the bowl, you've started off by whisking the eggs?

Eggs. Yep. They're nice and fluffy

and then I've added the cocoa

and it doesn't seem to be going right for some reason.

It's not looking as good as what I expected it to look.

-I don't know if I've done something wrong.

-It looks very wet.

Looking at your whisk here,

I think maybe you didn't get the egg to a nice fluffy consistency

before you added the cocoa.

So shall I start again?

-I would.

-I would.

-OK. Thank you.

I've never had a problem with this before.

I'm happy with that now. I think that's just wonderful.

Having said to him,

"You need to whisk on fast speed", he didn't do that the second time.

It isn't to full volume. He won't get a light sponge. He's in trouble.

Do your best.

One at the top.

There, there. Bake...bake well.

I forgot to put the oranges in. Arh!

Just about to make my sponge,

last minute, I forgot to put my orange rind in.

I should have mixed this all in with that, really.

Either I empty this out or start again. I don't like...ah...

I don't like starting again but, ah...it's just one of those things.

I think this might be fine, this might actually be fine.

Have you just built all the air out of it

and now you're just destroying it?

You had to come at the wrong time, didn't you?

-Well, it's just, you've whisked up the egg...

-I know.

..you've got the whole thing and then you've gone like that

and dropped all the air out of it. Just be careful, fold it rather than, you know...

-Massively whisk it.

-..doing that, yeah.

-Phew!

You came at the wrong time there. You guys were just looming

for my mistake, weren't you? Go away. Not now. Not now.

One of the key ingredients of a delicious gateau

is its decadent filling.

Tastes so nice.

Look at that. I mean, this is incredible.

You could Artex a ceiling with this stuff.

Wow.

Man alive. This stuff's like, got a life of its own. Look at that.

You can pick the bowl up with it.

Oh, my God.

Look at this!

Is that what frosting should look like? I don't know.

Oh. This is stressful.

-What are you doing there, luv?

-I've left this to boil earlier,

before I started making my other cake and it's actually...

-Here's one I boiled earlier. See what I did?

-Here's one I made earlier!

-Or here's one I baked earlier.

-Yeah, man.

This is where we're going with this. I know what you're doing.

-I've got to ask you, Andy...

-Uh-huh.

-Who is your favourite ever Blue Peter presenter,

-obviously apart from your good self?

-Don't ever put me in that position.

-Please. Please!

-You can't do this to me, because, like,

there's another 32, 33 presenters that might be offended by this.

Singleton, Groom, Judd, Duncan, Sundin, Heath.

All right. I do like John Noakes.

-Noakes was brave...

-Yeah. Nelson's Column.

..to the point of almost, you know, Nelson's Column, mate.

-No, no harness!

-He is a bit crazy.

-I know.

-This custard...

AS NOAKES: Come on, Andy.

This cust... is that John Noakes? Is that John Noakes?

AS NOAKES: I'm halfway up Nelson's Column. I've got no harness.

Comic Relief bakers, you have got 30 minutes left on your gateau.

Look at that. They're rising so much,

they're almost touching the shelf above.

I really am going to need the ladder

and scaffolding to put this thing together. Look at it.

This is the critical period for me. Keep an eye on the cakes.

Owhh, ha-ha!

There, see? Perfect.

I'm feeling very confident now, yeah. That is lovely now.

-Are these the sponges?

-Yeah.

-Yeah. Yeah.

(They look like chocolate berets.)

(I don't think I dare tell him that though. I'm a bit scared.)

-These look...the sponges are a great colour, Duncan.

-Yeah.

They're a little bit on the flat side, possibly?

Not when it's assembled they're not, no.

-They're a bit like chocolate berets.

-Yeah?

I think there's a business idea to be had in a chocolate beret...

..wear it and eat it.

HURRIEDLY: I'm going to leave you actually. See you in a bit, Duncan.

To finish in time,

Simon has decided to increase the temperature of his oven.

See what the damage is?

It's a bit burnt around the top and the edges.

I'm going to put this outside to cool down for a few minutes.

Hopefully, outside the cooling breeze will help it to

cool down faster, essentially.

OK, so, I'm going to leave those there

to cool down for a bit longer and then I'll try and get a sander

or something, to make them look more acceptable.

The structure of a gateau depends on even layers.

OK, let's just go for broke.

-Don't say the word "broke", mate, please.

-All right.

Are we in? I can't see if I'm in.

I don't know if I'm in.

I don't know about that action, Andy, that worries me a bit, luv.

Do you know what, this isn't working.

This isn't working at all, is it? Have you got a bread knife? OK.

Simple.

See I think that serrated edge really helps it.

-You've got more control, haven't you, with a knife?

-Way more control.

-You're just levelling this right?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

OK, that's good. That's OK.

Because this is sunken at the top, it's very hard to get a level cut.

I'd...oh...hmm.

-Just don't do that, hmm.

-Sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry.

You keep doing that, hmm. And like... I know... it's over for me.

Mate, are they burnt? No. No, not at all.

What do you mean?

OK.

So, let's see how it works. Ah, beautiful.

-That's good.

-Beautiful.

-You see? You see how the...

-Yeah, man. You're on to something.

-Just that dark, just get the dark chocolate off the edge there.

-Yeah. yeah, yeah.

So just gently shaving it.

Smells a bit burnt, mate, not going to lie...

-What, what's that...

-But that's good. It's all coming off.

-What's that word you used? Burnt?

Right, now I'm going to start the construction of the whole thing now.

So, erm...do you think that's enough cream?

It's all about ratios in a gateau, isn't it? This is tough.

Try and drizzle it into these little channels here.

That's the top of the cake. So, we've got three layers at least.

Have I finished this layer?

That's the question.

This is agonising.

Arghh! OK, it's time to panic now.

Drum roll, please.

Comic Relief bakers, you've got ten minutes left on your gateau.

Ten minutes left.

Ten minutes left, OK. OK, we can do this. OK.

Just trying to salvage something here.

Should you make this smooth? What should this look like?

Comic Relief bakers, that is it.

I'm afraid you have to step away from your gateau.

C'est fini. C'est completement. Owf, aff, eeff! Fini.

Well, Warwick, we have a positive castle here.

It looks good, doesn't it?

I think the top what you've done here is...

I like that. I like the colours, I like the way it's been laid out.

My issue is... the sides of that I don't like.

It needs something,

whether it from coconut or almonds or something to...

You don't want to see that sort of plastering style around the side.

Oh! That is majestic.

Ohh!

That's a whopper that.

Do you know that's really good?

I think that's very good indeed.

The fruit in there and the mascarpone and the cream work well.

It's a bit dry and that's because it's overbaked,

-but the flavours in there are beautiful.

-Thank you very much.

Do you know what I'm worried about?

-Is you started off with eight eggs.

-Yes.

An eight-egg fatless sponge,

if it's made correctly, is really quite a big cake.

I think what's happened is there's no air in it.

-Right.

-So what you've got is quite a dense cake.

-DUNCAN:

-Doesn't it look lovely on the side?

-It looks lovely.

That beautiful orange going through there.

It's a little bit dense.

A bit like me?

It's ridiculous.

It's ridiculous.

-PAUL:

-The flavour is actually nice.

That orange jelly is delicious.

It's a pity, because you've got wonderful flavourings in it.

The orange is lovely.

It's a beautiful ganache with a lovely shine,

but the actual cake is really disappointing.

I'm disappointed.

I think the look of that looks great, you know.

Did you make your own creme patissiere?

Yeah. Made it all myself.

You used six eggs, absolutely correct.

That's the size I would expect from six eggs.

You've got a very nice bake on the sponge.

-Do you know what? I really like that.

-Really?

I really like that. I think the flavours are good. Your sponge is good.

I find it difficult to have a pop, to be honest.

-That's a nice cake.

-Really?

-Yeah.

Looking at it, everything is in the right proportion.

It looks like a gateau.

Let me cut into this. Oh, the knife drops through, well.

I can see that the oven was a bit hot

-and it isn't quite done in the middle.

-Oh, really?

-It's a little bit solid there but...

-OK.

-You see the colour of that?

It's not quite done in the middle.

That's where you didn't shave that off.

Does taste just a shade burnt,

-but it's nice when you get to the middle.

-The idea of it is good.

Chocolate, chocolate, more chocolate, works,

but unfortunately, because it's been burnt, you've destroyed

the integral structure of the sponge itself,

but the ganache is good and I particularly like the raspberries.

So you until you start eating, it's pretty good?

-It's great until you eat it.

-Right.

I'm taking away some positive comments from this.

They identified one small, yet key issue, with my cake

and that was how I baked it.

I created a massive cake, but there's everything in there.

I mean there's probably every food group plus one.

It's a full meal in itself.

It's not nouveau cuisine, is it, my gateau?

It's... there you go... pulgh. Hope they got a strong table.

I was disappointed in myself and how I did the baking,

but I've learnt so much, I really want to go home now

and make some more cakes and get them fluffier and get them better.

The judges ate it and enjoyed it.

You don't realise how happy I am right now.

The competition is open now.

It's up to the judges. They know what they're looking for.

They know what they need to see.

Comic Relief bakers,

we have shared so much together these last three challenges.

We've nozzled, we've straddled and we've shaved,

and then there was a bit of baking!

Mary and Paul have deliberated,

they've decided that Comic Relief Star Baker will go to...

..to Warwick.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Thank you very much indeed.

-So there you go Warwick.

-Thank you very much indeed. Appreciate it.

Look at that.

CHEERING

Check it out.

The winner's apron. "Roll up for Comic Relief", it says on there.

You know, for me, that bribe was money well spent,

I think, on this occasion, which they said

they were going to go on to donate to Comic Relief,

so everyone's a winner.

If we can go on national television and make a fool of ourselves

trying to bake, then people can do it at home.

It's a wonderful cause to be involved with. Baking's fun as well.

I've had a right giggle, quite frankly, you can, too.

If we've inspired you to get baking for Comic Relief

and I really hope that we have,

then why not go and buy the great Comic Relief Bake Off booklet?

It's full of recipes to help you with your bake sale.

For more information go to...

Next time...

-..another four well-known personalities...

-Help!

..take on three demanding challenges...

I don't know what I'm doing now, then. Ooh!

-< JULIA:

-Does it tell you what to do?

-Does it tell you where the nearest baker's is?

Ah!

..for two perfection-seeking judges...

It's got issues, yeah. Stay behind afterwards for a chat.

They are too close in texture.

..all for one aim, to raise money for Comic Relief.

I can tell by the look in their eyes,

that they think I'm a complete idiot.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd