Pennod 16 Hansh


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Pennod 16

Tiwns, comedi a lleisiau ffres. Blas o gynnwys arlein @hanshs4c. Tunes, comedy and fresh faces. A taste of online content @hanshs4c.


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-I'm a bit scared.

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-I've come to Cardiff, the big city.

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-There are cars everywhere.

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-It's nothing like Caernarfon

-or Deiniolen.

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-I'm in the old immigration building.

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-Scary.

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-I'm going ghost hunting.

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-Ghost Hunting

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-Right, let's do it.

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-Spooky.

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-Hello?

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-Let's have a scout.

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-This place is really creepy.

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-What the **** was that?

-****'s sake! ******* scary.

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-It's more creepy

-than when I interviewed Casi Wyn!

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-Hello?

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-I'm meant to be meeting a

-ghost hunter here somewhere. Scary.

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-Every building is scary really.

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-What the **** is that? ****head!

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-You're the ghost?

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-No, I'm the ghost hunter.

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-What do you do when you find one?

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-I talk to them. Ask questions.

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-Like a chat show.

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-What are we doing?

-Talking to ghosts?

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-Here we go. Hello!

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-Is anyone there

-apart from me and Debra?

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-Nothing.

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-Let's go home.

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-Are you doing anything tonight?

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-Fancy a pint?

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-You don't drink. Fancy a curry?

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-Let's look for ghosts.

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-You're right. Serious working heads

-on now. Let's find the ghosts.

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-After you.

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-OK, Gareth...

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-OK, Gareth...

-

-OK, Debs?

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-Sorry, carry on.

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-If you speak,

-the spirit will answer.

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-One knock for yes, two for no.

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-I don't know what to ask.

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-If it's easier,

-pretend you're doing the chat show.

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-I'll try.

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-Hello and welcome to Gareth,

-my chat show, with me, Gareth.

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-I'm here today

-with Debs and a ghost.

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-How are you? Alright?

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-Knock once for yes.

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-****ing hell! Pineapple ****!

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-Have you played Maes B?

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-These knocks are really scary.

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-Knock once if you're happy.

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-TWO KNOCKS

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-TWO KNOCKS

-

-What does that mean?!

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-This is harder

-than interviewing Casi Wyn.

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-Are we going for a curry now?

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-No. We're going to the

-most haunted room in the building.

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-Gareth.

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-Gareth.

-

-No.

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-# Going up creepy stairs with Debs #

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-It's really scary. No.

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-We'll go for a curry after it.

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-I have a hot date with Debs.

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-She's a bit creepy.

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-But I like that.

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-I'm here with Debs,

-my new girlfriend.

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-She's going to show me

-this spirit thing. What is it?

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-Ouija?

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-Ouija board.

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-Ouija. It's a good way

-of contacting spirits.

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-They can then communicate...

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-Gareth!

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-Sorry. Tell us

-about the Ouija board.

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-Put your hand here.

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-Is there anyone out there?

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-GARETH BREAKS WIND

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-Sorry.

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-It's moving by itself.

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-It's saying 'yes'.

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-Do you like Gladiators?

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-The film or the series?

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-The TV series.

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-I don't.

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-'No' is there! You don't have

-to spell it out and waste time.

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-You must be patient.

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-You need patience with this ghost.

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-Who's your favourite Gladiator?

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-Russell...

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-Oh, Russell Crowe

-from the Gladiator film.

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-This ghost has a sense of humour.

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-Are you on Twitter?

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-I've just finished

-my first ghost hunt.

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-I spoke to a ghost.

-I asked him if he's played Maes B.

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-I spoke about Gladiator. A bit of

-bants about the Welsh music scene.

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-It's been a laugh.

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-Shush! What's that?

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-KNOCKING

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-Shush!

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-There's a real ghost here!

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-Sorry. I was looking for my bag.

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-You scared the **** out of me.

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-I was sure you were Casi Wyn

-for a minute.

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-Who the **** is Casi Wyn?

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-The gothic songstress.

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-The pop diva from Bethel.

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-The indie pop darling.

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-Lewis Yr Eira's sister.

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-Oh, Heledd Ynyr from Porthpenwaig!

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-Yes, classic Casi Wyn.

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-Curry?

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-Yes.

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-Flour

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-Baking powder

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-Milk

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-Oil

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-Tomato sauce

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-Cheese

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-Parsley

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-Microwave for 80 seconds

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-# The clock strikes thirteen

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-# It's one in the afternoon

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-# Tonight, all the creatures

-of the night

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-# Will play under the full moon

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-# Zombies

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-# Zombies

-

-# Offenders

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-# Pumpkins

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-# Pumpkins

-

-# Criminals

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-# Perverts playing trick or treat

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-# Ghosts

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-# Ghosts

-

-# Murderers

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-# Witches

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-# Witches

-

-# Conservatives

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-# Watch out for these on the streets

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-# Dracula

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-# Dracula

-

-# ISIS

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-# The devil

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-# The devil

-

-# Trident

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-# Mam checking my browsing history

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-# Skeleton

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-# Skeleton

-

-# Brummies

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-# Frankenstein

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-# Flu jab,

-watch out for these on the streets

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-# Cobwebs

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-# Cobwebs

-

-# Racism

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-# Werewolf

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-# Werewolf

-

-# From Gladiators, Germany in 1939

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-# Goblins

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-# Goblins

-

-# Ageing

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-# Gremlins

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-# Gremlins

-

-# Clowns, don't be left alone

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-# On Halloween #

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-Daf, I need you to hoover the studio

-before tomorrow.

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-Mr Sakamoto is coming over

-to check the accounts.

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-For the last time,

-Mr Sakamoto doesn't exist.

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-Anyway, he's not my boss.

-We're free spirits, man!

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-We're riding the Welsh media's

-never-ending wave.

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-We don't need bosses.

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-We don't need bosses.

-

-You're wrong. We need eight.

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-The 8 most epic bosses ever

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-Right. Got ya.

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-M Bison is so epic...

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-..even the rubbish Street Fighter

-film didn't dent his cool.

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-I'm willing to bet you won't find

-a scarier man in knee-high boots...

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-..this side

-of Frankfurt's S&M clubs.

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-I thought we agreed

-not to talk about that weekend.

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-Helmut! I'll never forget you!

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-Atheon was the boss at the end

-of the first raid in Destiny.

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-The best part of the game

-by a long way.

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-I can't watch this.

-I spent months playing Destiny.

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-And what for?

-I'm having flashbacks.

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-Calm down. It's not like

-you've been to Vietnam.

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-You weren't there, man!

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-You weren't there!

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-Earthbound

-is my favourite game ever.

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-One reason for that

-is the superb boss at the end.

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-Giygas is an alien

-who's trying to conquer the world.

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-He's described

-as an universal cosmic destroyer.

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-But when you do meet him, he

-turns out to be a bit of an idiot.

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-He looks like a foetus.

-You almost feel bad murdering him.

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-Your favourite game?

-That explains a lot.

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-Do you feel better?

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-Just don't remind me

-of any other traumatic experiences.

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-Oh, God!

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-What else is there to say

-about these two scamps.

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-Imagine the situation.

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-You're making your way

-around the lifeless complex.

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-At the end is a robot

-intent on cutting your life short...

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-..while making fun of you.

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-Oof! Sounds rough.

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-That's enough about

-the self-service tills in Tesco.

0:10:580:11:02

-What about a portal?

0:11:020:11:03

-What about a portal?

-

-Good one.

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-Not many bosses are so good

-that the game's named after them.

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-But that's what you get

-in Donkey Kong.

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-The game is one big fight

-against the boss, really.

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-Mario chases the gorilla

-across four levels.

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-It more or less invented

-the platform game at the same time.

0:11:200:11:24

-It's like that time I was in Tesco.

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-I was in Tesco, right?

0:11:280:11:29

-Give it a rest, Daf.

-The moment's passed.

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-Oh.

0:11:330:11:34

-Hitler?

0:11:360:11:37

-Hitler's No.2 on our list.

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-Hitler's No.2 on our list.

-

-Yep.

0:11:390:11:40

-There's a boss

-more impressive than Hitler?

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-If this doesn't knock my socks off,

-I'm leaving.

0:11:430:11:47

-Ah, fair enough.

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-Nothing says epic more than Bowser,

-Mario's chief enemy...

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-..climbing a skyscraper

-like King Kong on steroids.

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-He's dressed like a cat too.

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-You can imagine how popular this was

-on the Internet.

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-Nintendo getting hard

-about all-powerful cats.

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-Hope no-one shows them

-2 Girls 1 Cup.

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-Oh, no! Flashbacks.

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-Flashbacks!

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-.

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-Subtitles

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-Subtitles

-

-Subtitles

0:12:230:12:25

-Samuel!

0:12:260:12:27

-Bry in Transylvania

0:12:280:12:29

-Samuel!

0:12:290:12:31

-Romania! What a place!

0:12:310:12:33

-You can do whatever you like.

0:12:340:12:36

-Jesus, Samuel!

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-Right, let's show how it's done.

0:12:370:12:40

-I feel like an American!

0:12:410:12:42

-I'm good, lads.

0:12:450:12:46

-BROKEN GLASS

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-Shit. Sorry.

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-Charge it to S4C.

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-Imagine carrying

-these around in Wales.

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-Saturday night in Caernarfon

-would be even more lethal.

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-What did you say?

-Little Joni didn't get stage?

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-I didn't agree with the adjudication

-so I popped a cap in his ass.

0:13:040:13:08

-It's time we had a Welsh action film

-like Die Hard or Apocalypse Now.

0:13:100:13:15

-We could have an agricultural

-Jean-Claude or Jason Statham.

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-Like Sylvester Stallone

-just that he can talk.

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-Westwalian Shaft.

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-But Welsh isn't very scary.

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-What's Terminator in Welsh?

-"DJ Bry yw y Terfynwr!"

0:13:280:13:32

-I'll be back.

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-If he was Welsh, he'd say,

-"Byddai nol whap."

0:13:340:13:39

-Useless. Say hello

-to my little friend.

0:13:390:13:43

-"Gwed helo i fy ffrind mynwesol."

0:13:430:13:45

-You talkin' to me?

-"Ti'n siarad a fi? Sneb arall 'ma."

0:13:460:13:49

-Go ahead, punk. Make my day.

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-"Ie, cerwch chi.

-Gwnewch chi fy niwrnod."

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-It doesn't have the same ring to it.

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-"I don't have money,

-but what I do have...

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-"..are a very particular

-set of skills.

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-"I will look for you, I will

-find you and I will kill you."

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-Yes, I am. I'm going to do it.

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-Try and stop me. I'm going to do it.

0:14:140:14:17

-Jesus, Samuel.

-I'm good, you're lethal!

0:14:210:14:24

-Yes, sorry about that bulb.

0:14:260:14:28

-Yes, charge it to S4C.

-There's a new boy in charge.

0:14:290:14:32

-My name? Iolo Williams.

0:14:320:14:35

-Jump start the van, Samuel.

0:14:360:14:37

-Right, Samuel. I'm ready now.

0:14:380:14:41

-Where are we going?

0:14:410:14:42

-A castle? We could've stayed

-in Wales for that.

0:14:430:14:46

-Oh, Dracula's castle.

0:14:460:14:48

-A castle

-with a bloodsucking vampire?

0:14:490:14:51

-Like Prince Charles

-in Caernarfon Castle in '69.

0:14:520:14:55

-It looks crap.

0:14:550:14:57

-Single file, Samuel.

0:14:570:14:59

-There's not much health and safety

-here.

0:14:590:15:02

-I don't Huw Fash

-doing an item here for Prynhawn Da.

0:15:020:15:05

-Dear me.

0:15:050:15:06

-I'm not fussed by this.

-Comfort's my thing.

0:15:070:15:11

-Give me tracksuit bottoms any day.

0:15:110:15:13

-Do they have central heating? It

-must cost a bomb to warm this place.

0:15:140:15:18

-They've got 4G here.

0:15:190:15:20

-Good signal. Better than Ceredigion.

0:15:210:15:24

-Proper Welsh weather.

-Dracula probably liked rain.

0:15:240:15:27

-He didn't like the sun

-more than a ginger kid.

0:15:280:15:31

-Samuel! Leave it!

0:15:310:15:32

-There's a lot of fuss about this

-Dracula bloke. He's not even here.

0:15:330:15:37

-Like Bryn Terfel. A big table.

-Special.

0:15:370:15:40

-The servants' quarters are on

-the other side of the castle. Go!

0:15:400:15:44

-Tool.

0:15:460:15:47

-Count Dracula.

0:15:480:15:49

-A man with a noble title

-who wants to go to England...

0:15:490:15:53

-..lives for centuries and goes on

-and on and you can't get rid of him.

0:15:530:15:59

-Yes. Yes!

0:16:000:16:01

-Like Dafydd Elis-Thomas!

0:16:020:16:03

-That's who he is!

0:16:050:16:06

-I'm Glyn.

0:16:160:16:16

-I'm Glyn.

-

-I'm Elis.

0:16:160:16:17

-I'm...

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-10 questions

0:16:190:16:22

-First gig?

0:16:220:16:24

-Our first gig as a band...

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-..was in Gwdihw as part of Swn

-three years ago.

0:16:270:16:31

-First music love?

0:16:310:16:34

-Paul Westerberg of The Replacements.

0:16:340:16:36

-Probably, yeah.

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-The Beatles.

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-Ringo. Next question.

0:16:400:16:42

-Worst gig you've played?

0:16:420:16:45

-Maes B.

0:16:450:16:47

-Probably.

0:16:470:16:48

-I was...

0:16:490:16:50

-I don't know. Every gig.

0:16:500:16:52

-What do you cook well?

0:16:530:16:55

-Elis is definitely the best.

0:16:550:16:57

-Spag bol.

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-And a mean omelette.

0:16:590:17:00

-Yes, amlotte.

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-Omelette!

0:17:030:17:04

-Who would you swap and why?

0:17:040:17:07

-I'd probably

-replace everyone in this band.

0:17:070:17:10

-What would the name of

-your festival be and who would play?

0:17:110:17:15

-Melltfest.

0:17:150:17:16

-Melltfest.

-

-Fuckfest!

0:17:160:17:17

-We'd call it Fuckfest.

0:17:180:17:19

-Headline band - The Fucks.

0:17:210:17:23

-Fucks. Er... yeah.

0:17:230:17:25

-Biggest fashion mistake?

0:17:270:17:30

-I shaved off all around my head...

0:17:300:17:35

-..leaving very long hair on the top.

0:17:350:17:40

-When Oz cut your hair. I remember.

0:17:400:17:42

-Have you broken the law?

0:17:430:17:45

-Shush!

0:17:450:17:46

-Ideal vehicle?

0:17:480:17:50

-A DeLorean.

0:17:510:17:52

-Not practical.

0:17:540:17:56

-Tell a joke

0:17:560:17:59

-A woman goes to the doctor...

0:17:590:18:01

-..with a bit of lettuce sticking out

-the top of her knickers.

0:18:010:18:05

-The doctor goes, "That looks nasty."

0:18:050:18:07

-It's just the tip of the iceberg.

0:18:070:18:09

-60ml water

0:18:200:18:21

-60ml milk

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-60ml butter

0:18:230:18:24

-Boil

0:18:250:18:28

-80g flour

0:18:310:18:32

-2 eggs

0:18:360:18:37

-Water

0:18:490:18:51

-170C 20-25 minutes

0:18:510:18:54

-Whipped cream

0:18:570:18:59

-200ml cream

0:19:020:19:04

-100g chocolate

0:19:040:19:05

-3 scoops chocolate ice cream,

-50ml milk

0:19:080:19:11

-Brownie pieces

0:19:230:19:24

-Why are we doing this? It's shit!

0:19:390:19:42

-Aargh!

0:19:430:19:44

-Halloween. Hansh has sent me

-to the Silver Mountain Experience.

0:19:450:19:51

-There's something here

-that's supposed to scare me.

0:19:510:19:54

-It'll be fine.

0:19:540:19:56

-Terror Mountain

-is a unique horror experience.

0:19:560:19:59

-It's near Aberystwyth

-and lasts over an hour.

0:19:590:20:03

-There are over 20 characters ready

-to welcome any brave person.

0:20:030:20:07

-I'm not looking forward to this. I

-feel I'm in the Blair Witch Project.

0:20:090:20:12

-We're going into the woods

-because that makes sense.

0:20:130:20:17

-It's really wet!

0:20:180:20:20

-This is where I leave you.

0:20:210:20:23

-No!

0:20:270:20:28

-I can just hear this clicking.

0:20:290:20:31

-That's all.

0:20:320:20:34

-No! I think I've gone mad.

0:20:410:20:44

-No, no, no!

0:20:480:20:49

-This is awful!

0:20:510:20:53

-Why are we doing this? It's shit!

0:20:530:20:56

-I don't...

0:20:560:20:57

-No!

0:20:580:20:59

-Oh, God.

0:20:590:21:00

-Oh, God.

-

-Single file! Move it!

0:21:000:21:01

-In you come! Hands up! Move!

0:21:020:21:04

-No!

0:21:050:21:06

-Decontamination sequence complete.

0:21:100:21:13

-Ta-ra!

0:21:140:21:16

-We're following a woman

-who's fucking mental.

0:21:160:21:19

-We're underground.

0:21:190:21:21

-Oh, God!

0:21:210:21:22

-Just go through. There's nothing

-to be afraid of. Don't worry.

0:21:240:21:29

-Go that way as quickly as you can!

0:21:300:21:32

-Oh, my God!

0:21:340:21:36

-Oh, God! I don't like this.

0:21:380:21:40

-Things are following us

-and I don't like it at all.

0:21:410:21:44

-Hang on. My hat's gone.

0:21:450:21:47

-Sorry!

0:21:470:21:48

-OK, I've just apologized

-to a fucking monster.

0:21:490:21:52

-Oh, my God!

0:21:550:21:56

-It's really dark down here.

0:21:590:22:01

-We're out. Thank fuck.

0:22:010:22:03

-Are we?

0:22:030:22:04

-No. It hasn't finished. Oh, God.

0:22:040:22:07

-No, no, no, no, no!

0:22:100:22:12

-No, no, no!

0:22:120:22:13

-Sorry, mate!

0:22:130:22:15

-That was really, really scary.

0:22:280:22:31

-It was almost all in the dark

-and I hate the dark.

0:22:320:22:35

-People were jumping out.

-It was yuck!

0:22:360:22:38

-Happy Halloween, everyone!

0:22:390:22:41

-S4C Subtitles by Testun Cyf.

0:22:560:22:58

-.

0:22:580:22:58

Tiwns, comedi a lleisiau ffres. Blas o gynnwys arlein @hanshs4c. Tunes, comedy and fresh faces. A taste of online content @hanshs4c.