19/12/2015 Click - Short Edition

It was the week before Christmas and all through the house

the merry team assembled at the click of a mouse.

Presents were shared, opened and praised to a great festive

special many a glass was raised.

Hello and welcome to the Clickmas special!

Everyone is here, all the outfits and colours are here.

If you are wondering where LJ Rich is, she is of course here.

Listen, apart from the beautiful playing you

have something else that will introduce a vote of festive cheers?

I have. It is this.

The a cappella app.

That is truly amazing.

That is a beautiful thing.

Nine LJ's all singing in harmony.

It is quite fun to do.

I know six people who would like to have a go at that

and be awful at it.

Shall we?

# Jingle bells, jingle bells

# jingle all the way...

# Babababab

jingle bells, jingle bells.

ALL SING.

Good.

Right, who fancies a drink after that?

Fortunately, Mark has been mixing something special for us over there.

What I'm going to do is mix the perfect festive tipple with the

aid of this,

which is a very posh set of scales which plugs into a tablet.

All you do is select the drink that you want to make

from this enormous list.

You've got the ingredients there.

Make sure you've got all of those before you start.

Hit build.

Basically, it tells you how much of an ingredient you need to add.

As it's a scale it is measuring how much of any one

of the liquids I am pouring in.

Here is the clever bit.

If I pour too much of any of the ingredients in,

the app recalculates and figures out how much of the other ingredients I

need to add so that the drink is absolutely perfect.

The app can even suggest drinks based on the information you tell it

about ingredients you have in your cupboards.

I might not be a cocktail barman, but I do at least now have

a perfectly measured drink.

Right. There you go.

Get your laughing gear around that.

Fantastic...I think. Here we go.

Thank you.

Ah, yeah.

I detect a hint of irony.

Just a dash of sarcasm on the side.

SINGING.

This company aims to use ethically sourced materials but instead

of having to replace your phone every couple

of years because it has separate components that you can easily

change you should just be able to replace parts when they break.

Wow.

You can easily open it, so you can see how they come apart.

You have to slide the two blue bits at the bottom.

The screen comes off, the battery can be easily changed and

you can even replace the camera.

Why don't you try and take a selfie?

Let's do that.

OK, say cheese!

Merry Christmas.

A hessian sack.

I haven't seen one of these since I jumped about in infant school

in one.

Proper presents!

Look at this!

Unwrap! Unwrap!

Incoming present!

Present is Dalek.

Exterminate!

One thing you need to be able to do on Christmas Day is exterminate

your relatives!

Of course.

Thank you! That's marvellous.

I'll tidy that up later.

That's beautiful.

Because you got so excited about this last week...

Right.

Not that I want to spoil the surprise for you, I had

a word with Santa and he managed to find this very, um, sought-after...

BB-8, everybody.

BB-8!

I had a real one last week and a toy one this time.

That's the best reaction to a present I've ever had.

What? The raspberry?

Inductive charging base, trade wear, skill wear, hardware!

It's got it all.

And it's app-controlled.

I tried it out and I have to say my cat loves lifting its head

off by the aerial.

She thinks it's the best one in the world.

That's fantastic. Look at this.

It's got three modes.

It's got an explore mode, so you set it off and it explores and maps

your area on its own.

But you have you to block off stairs and things like that because it's

not terribly intelligent about not going down the stairs.

It's got the drive mode, where you can basically control it and drive

it your your smartphone app and it sends a holographic message.

No way!

Like, "Help me, Spenley-wan-clickobi!

"You're my only hope!"

I'm so glad we rehearsed that.

Otherwise it could have been terrible.

That moves, this moves.

Race?

Only one way to decide.

Robot race.

Race!

3, 2, 1...

Go!

Exterminate!

On the south coast of England, the royal citadel, a military base

with a very unusual recruit.

Yes, it's a Dalek that lives with the army.

And not just any home-made Dalek, a Dalek that was made by the

Royal Citadel's vicar for a children's holiday club.

Now, where would I find said vicar dressed as a Dalek?

Ah...

Finally, we meet.

Hello. Hello.

You are in there?

Can I help you off with this?

You most certainly can.

Here we go.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

Wow.

Oh!

That's better.

Oh, my word.

What a...

..a beautiful thing.

Oh, my goodness.

It's a mobility scooter that you've modified.

Absolutely.

I'm counting on this in my old age, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. He fires a lethal dose of carbon dioxide from a fire

so on and I exterminated somebody with the CO2, and then reached for

-- with carbon dioxide.

The padre has done Davros proud.

But mind your ground clearance, vicar, or you might

Ooh! That's gotta hurt! vicar, or you might

The shell is made from the finest MDF, sat atop that

LAUGHS from the finest MDF, sat atop that

Maybe this is why they went round exterminating everyone.

They just couldn't see properly and they needed things out of their way.

Right.

Time to find out what the human soldiers here at the Citadel make

of their wheelie new recruit.

ROBOT VOICE: Do not exterminate me.

I am your new recruit.

Sorry.

I was trying to extend my plunger.

Oh, well.

Time for a good old-fashioned briefing and a nice group hug.

After that, we'll be split into three sections...

Looking forward to going out on manoeuvres.

I'm getting quite good at reverse.

Have you quite finished?

Oh, I can't see.

The vision's impaired.

Pay attention to the brief.

Thank you.

LAUGHS

Did I miss anything?

Sorry. Oh!

Is that it?

Are we finished?

Good. Right.

End of programme.

Thank you so much for watching our Click-mas Special.

On behalf of all of us, have a brilliant festive season,

goodbye and we'll see you in 2016.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

# Hope you don't have to do the dishes

# Fa-la-la-la

# May your batteries last all day