Trychineb Aberfan: Brwydr Bernard Y Byd ar Bedwar

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-I remember this boy.

-I remember this girl too.

-Bernard Thomas

-is at the Aberfan cemetery.

-This boy was in my class.

-This guy here

-had a pretty good singing voice.

-Bernard is 59 years old.

-Many of his childhood friends

-are buried here.

-This girl lived

-on the street next to mine.

-For 50 years,

-he's been trying to come to terms...

-..with the devastation

-in his village.

-I have aged. They haven't.

-They're all still nine years old,

-eight years old, seven years old.

-Some over here were

-just seven years old at the time.

-No chance.

-No hope.

-Tonight,

-we follow Bernard's battle...

-..to live with the scars

-of the Aberfan disaster.

-Bernard is on his way

-to Merthyr Tydfil today.

-He doesn't own a car.

-He catches the bus from

-Aberfan to Merthyr regularly.

-50 years ago, he lived through

-one of the darkest days...

-..in recent Welsh history.

-In trying to cope with his memories,

-he has, at times, turned to alcohol.

-I tend to drink quite a bit.

-I do silly things to be honest.

-He's been out of work

-for over a decade.

-Despite facing periods of hardship

-and illness...

-..he says he has now managed to

-control his alcohol intake.

-I've got a little handle on it.

-A few times a week, I'll have a

-couple of glasses of wine.

-Not every day.

-He turned 59 years old

-at the end of June.

-On his birthday, he came to this

-Wetherspoon in Merthyr to celebrate.

-I came here for a drop of wine

-and to have a chat.

-I had to have a

-one-man birthday party.

-One-man birthday party.

-50 years ago, Bernard...

-..like these children

-was on his way to school in Aberfan.

-He had no idea

-what would face him...

-..on the morning

-of the 21st of October 1966.

-I got up in the morning with my

-brother and we had breakfast.

-We started walking to school

-between eight and half past.

-On that morning, 240 children

-walked through the doors...

-..at Pantglas Junior School.

-That was the final Friday

-before autumn half term.

-We went in to the class.

-We were all given tasks to complete.

-I was reading a book.

-Bernard was a nine-year-old boy

-at the time.

-The next few minutes would scar

-the rest of his life.

-We could hear this noise,

-this rumble coming.

-I thought it was either

-a thunder clap or a jet over head.

-The next thing we knew,

-the teacher told us to run...

-..it was pandemonium in the class.

-We looked up to the left

-toward the windows.

-There was a wall of black stuff

-descending on the school.

-The next thing I knew, it had lifted

-me up, desk chair and everything.

-It pushed me

-as if I was on a tidal wave.

-A part of no.7 tip on the edge of

-the village had slipped.

-It destroyed Pantglas School

-and some houses nearby.

-Hundreds came to help as word

-spread of a disaster in Aberfan.

-Amongst the first to arrive

-was Rev D Ben Rees...

-..who was the minister at a chapel

-in the next village.

-There were hundreds of miners

-arriving at the same time as me.

-They came from Merthyr Vale

-coal mine.

-I didn't have one, but was given a

-shovel by one of the miners I knew.

-We had nothing but shovels

-to try to find the children...

-..buried amongst the slurry

-in the tip that came down.

-The older boys from the local

-grammar school were sent to help.

-Wyn James was amongst them.

-He was filmed as he helped to clear

-rubble away in buckets.

-You can see him here in the

-spectacles, white shirt and tie.

-When we were working

-with these buckets...

-..behind the school

-on the tips above us...

-..I remember me and others

-looking at the tips...

-..because we didn't know if

-something else would happen.

-Inside the school,

-the fear was very real.

-The first thing I heard...

-..was the other children

-screaming and shouting.

-It was terrible.

-Something had stopped the slurry

-from going over me.

-I was up against the wall like this.

-I sat and looked around and saw

-the class teacher, Mr Williams.

-He helped me out

-through the top of the door.

-He smashed the small panes of glass.

-He helped me out

-through the top of the door...

-..and out

-through the hall's windows.

-They were open by this point.

-I climbed on to the windowsill.

-I was helped down

-by a man on the outside.

-Bernard was taken

-to St Tydfil's hospital.

-He'd been knocked

-unconscious briefly...

-..but hadn't suffered

-any serious physical injuries.

-At the school, the efforts to find

-his friends alive continued.

-Every now and then there would be a

-whistle sounded...

-..and it would be followed

-by an eerie silence.

-There would be so much activity

-and then everyone would be quiet.

-Someone would be straining

-to hear under the slurry...

-..if someone was shouting

-or some signs of life.

-Despite some escaping

-with their lives...

-..after 11.00am

-no survivors were found.

-144 people were killed

-in the disaster.

-116 of those were children.

-Today, a memorial garden stands on

-the site of the old Pantglas school.

-Bernard comes here sometimes...

-..to think about what happened

-at his school.

-The girl who sat next to me died.

-A lot of the children

-in my class were killed.

-I'm here through luck and fate.

-If I was somewhere else

-in the school...

-..the corridor or this side

-or that side.

-Even if I'd been

-standing or sitting...

-..at a different desk

-in the same room, I would have died.

-Bernard lost his best friend

-and cousin...

-..who lived opposite him

-in the disaster.

-Thinking about the horrible way

-they died still scars his memories.

-I still can't believe how the stuff

-was like mud and water one second...

-..as it flowed down and in...

-..and when it settled and the water

-drained away it was like concrete.

-It was terrible.

-I can't imagine it myself...

-..the suffering they went through.

-Apart from the fear of what was

-going on. Just the sheer fright.

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-Bernard Thomas has always lived

-in the same house...

-..on Heol Ynys Y Gored, Aberfan.

-Four children from this street never

-returned home from Pantglas School.

-For the past 50 years, Bernard

-has found it difficult to live...

-..amongst the families

-of those who died.

-It's only in the last few years that

-I've spoken to a couple of people.

-It's taken that long.

-Nearly half a century.

-It was difficult to face

-the brothers and sisters...

-..of those who had died.

-And the parents too.

-I've been through

-what is called survivor guilt.

-I still suffer in some ways.

-This is the path Bernard took

-to Pantglas School...

-..on the morning of the disaster.

-He says that local people knew

-the tips could be dangerous.

-Some of them presented petitions...

-..about the safety of the waste tips

-before 1966.

-They were warned time and again

-that something would happen one day.

-There were concerns...

-..because other tips had slipped

-before this tragedy.

-The water that flowed under the tips

-to make them unstable...

-..can still be seen today.

-You can hear the water now.

-These were the streams that flowed

-underneath spoil tip Number 7.

-You can hear the water.

-That's the sound of the water.

-But no-one had imagined

-the waste tips could be so deadly.

-With the government closing coal

-mines in Wales during the '60s...

-..no-one wanted

-to make too much of a fuss.

-I admit that I,

-like all the others...

-..was caught up in the big dilemma

-of work versus no work.

-That was everyone's fear.

-We were afraid that Merthyr Vale

-Colliery would be closed down.

-D Ben Rees was active within the

-Labour Party in the area in 1966.

-After the disaster, the Labour

-Government set up a tribunal...

-..which concluded

-that the National Coal Board...

-..was to blame

-for the loss of life.

-The Coal Board tried to blame

-the heavy rain of the previous days.

-But the rain wasn't responsible

-and neither was God.

-It was human negligence...

-..and the fact

-that these men had not realized...

-..that they needed to be

-much more careful...

-..about where waste was thrown.

-But no-one was punished or held

-to account for these failures.

-This makes Bernard's blood boil,

-even today.

-The children and adults who died

-were murdered.

-And no-one was held to account

-for those murders.

-They got away with it scot-free.

-Thomas, Bernard. That's me.

-Today, Bernard is at home

-with his mother.

-For the first time,

-he's seen a file we've found.

-It contains records of four

-psychiatric assessments...

-..carried out after the tragedy.

-His younger brother, Andrew...

-..also made it out

-of Pantglas School alive.

-That's a photo of me

-and there's my brother.

-However, his cousin

-and his best friend were killed.

-The reports state

-that this affected him.

-The psychiatric said that Bernard

-lacked confidence after the tragedy.

-He was scared of going upstairs

-without a torch or light.

-He lost his temper with his family

-and had trouble sleeping.

-Getting off to sleep. Yeah.

-That's right too. I couldn't sleep.

-The records state

-that he had EEG scans...

-..which showed abnormality

-in his brain.

-One report says, "The EEGs confirm

-the original opinion...

-"..that he has been suffering from

-a post-concussional syndrome...

-"..and also are strongly suggestive

-that he may develop...

-"..post-traumatic epilepsy

-at a later date."

-But one document shows

-that Bernard's father...

-..didn't believe

-there was much wrong with him.

-Yes, that's true.

-My father didn't think

-my condition was serious.

-But this doctor

-could see something different.

-A later report says,

-"It now appears probable...

-"..that his future performance

-at school...

-"..and in subsequent employment

-may be significantly affected...

-"..as a result of his experiences.

-"The outlook for complete recovery

-can only be considered as fair."

-In 1973, Bernard's family

-received 550 in compensation...

-..for the damage caused.

-Receiving that money didn't undo

-any of what had happened.

-It didn't take away those memories.

-No amount of money in the world...

-..could do right

-for something like that.

-Despite the memories,

-Bernard has never left Aberfan.

-The mental scars of that day

-remain with him today.

-I can't forget

-the children's screams.

-It affects me even now.

-It's still with me.

-It's still in my head.

-Despite not being badly injured

-physically, it was more in the mind.

-The effect was mental.

-At the end of the 1990s, Dr Dave

-Williams led a study on PTSD...

-..Post-traumatic stress disorder...

-..with survivors

-of the Aberfan disaster.

-Bernard Thomas found out then

-that he suffered from the condition.

-What we found was that

-even after 30 years...

-..significant numbers

-of people were...

-..if not suffering from the whole

-post-traumatic disorder condition...

-..were suffering from post-traumatic

-stress disorder symptoms...

-..that were troubling

-and concerned them.

-Of particular concern

-is those intrusive thoughts...

-..the equivalent of having

-the disaster replayed to you...

-..without you owning

-the off or on switch.

-The report showed that about

-half of those who were children...

-..at the time of the disaster had

-suffered from PTSD at some point.

-A third still suffered

-from the condition.

-If you are suffering in this way...

-..and having anxiety

-on a day to day basis...

-..over the years, alcohol

-and other drugs have been a problem.

-We see it in people

-who've survived from Aberfan.

-We see it in groups of people

-like veterans...

-..who struggle to get the traumatic

-memories out of their head.

-Bernard has tried to seek solace

-in alcohol at times.

-He feels that the effects

-of the disaster...

-..have influenced

-all aspects of his life.

-He worked in the Hoover factory

-in Merthyr for 14 years.

-But he was made redundant

-at the beginning of the 1990s.

-For 18 months, he worked

-in a solicitor's office.

-But to all intents and purposes,

-he's been unemployed for 25 years.

-I have some hidden symptoms.

-You can't see them on the outside.

-I have diabetes, glaucoma.

-I have trouble with my eyes.

-I also have high blood pressure.

-There is always stigma

-linked to PTSD...

-..as there is

-with any mental health issue.

-He now receives just over 100

-a week in benefits.

-He feels that politicians

-could have done much more...

-..to secure opportunities

-for people like him.

-Most of them,

-even those in the Labour Party...

-..come from a privileged background.

-They're out of touch

-with people like me.

-Many people tend to blame people

-like me. They think it's our fault.

-It's really down to the situation.

-Despite the problems Bernard's had

-during his life...

-..he still considers himself

-to be lucky.

-This book is a record of the

-birthdays of all the children...

-..who never came home that day.

-I'm still here. They're not.

-They're only here in the memories

-of their parents and their friends.

-Those people who remember them.

-Nearly half

-of Pantglas School's pupils...

-..were killed on 21 October, 1966.

-The day that Aberfan

-lost a generation.

-I always think about what

-all those children would be doing...

-..if they were still here.

-Which ones would have got married?

-Where would they have worked?

-Fifty years after that tragic day...

-..Bernard's battle to cope

-with his mental scars continues.

-But he's determined

-to remember those...

-..who were less fortunate than him.

-I must remember.

-I must keep the memory alive.

-Lest we forget, as they say.

-S4C Subtitles by Testun Cyf.

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