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Mum's Army

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My favourite episode, after due consideration of all the programmes,

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and there are 80 of them, was one called Mum's Army.

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I've been approached by some of the womenfolk,

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who want to join us in our fight against the common foe.

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For making the tea, and the cocoa, etc.

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-Buttons!

-I beg your pardon?

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Buttons. Buttons, sir. They could sew on buttons.

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Precisely. Yes, that's a very good point, Frazer.

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We used to read through the episodes to begin with on Monday,

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and when we read through this one, Arthur said he didn't like it.

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He said, "Quite honestly,

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"if I'd seen this programme before today, I wouldn't have done it."

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I said, "For God's sake, you've had the thing a month!

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"What have you done with it?

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"Why haven't you read it?"

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Gradually, I think, because his wife probably spoke to him - she used to

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read the scripts for him, and tell him what was good and what wasn't.

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And I think, by the end of the week...

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By Thursday, he was saying, "This programme is genius."

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-I know you fancy yourself as a ladies' man.

-What?

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But those women are going to be subjected to the same

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discipline as the men, so let's start as we mean to go on.

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Well, at least we can be polite to them, sir.

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I quite agree with you, but we don't need all this Jack Buchanan stuff.

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It was a unique episode, because otherwise, we virtually had

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no women at all.

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The occasional wife would creep in somehow,

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but otherwise they didn't figure.

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But it was very good for Frazer, saying,

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"She's got lovely big thighs," you know.

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"Firm thighs."

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May I point out that Miss Ironside here is doing it very, very well?

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Her legs are coming together with a firm, strong action.

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Just you listen, sir.

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Thank you, Frazer.

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I hadn't noticed that that girl's got very big thighs, had you?

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It was also an opportunity to put Wendy Richard into the show,

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as Walker's girlfriend.

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Arthur Lowe loved Wendy Richard.

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Now, where do you live, Miss Usher... Er... Er...Parish?

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-Down Berwick Road. 35.

-Berwick Road.

-Yes. I live with my dad.

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He's 6ft 3, so don't you go getting any ideas.

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The other thing one had to do was stop him being charming,

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cos that was disastrous, when he was trying to be sort of likeable,

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and all that sort of thing.

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I said, "For God's sake, play it selfish, and he did.

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-Christian name?

-Fiona.

-Fiona.

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-A pretty name.

-Oh!

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-You think so?

-Yes, it's always been one of my favourites.

-Oh, thank you.

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I was very lucky to get Carmen Silvera to play Mrs Gray.

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She's a lovely actress, and she was so retiring, and so delicate,

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the way she played it.

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And, of course, ultimately, I used her in 'Allo! 'Allo!

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But she was so poignant and so lovely in Mum's Army.

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It was a beautiful performance.

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Do you always wear glasses?

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Yes. Yes, I always have.

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Would you take them off for a moment?

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If you wish.

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Oh, that's so much better.

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I think it's more reflective and more sad, in a way,

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and more indicative of an awful lot of Mainwaring, Arthur Lowe's talent.

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And he was able to express things in that programme, I think,

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that he couldn't normally express at all.

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But I... I... I don't want you to go.

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The whole pattern of my life has changed.

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-I just live from one meeting to the next.

-I know.

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And I'm just the same, but it's the only thing to do.

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-People are talking.

-People always talk. Who cares about that?

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A lot of people said it was like Brief Encounter, which it was,

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quite honestly.

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I'd seen Brief Encounter, and thought it was something that

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was very suitable for a programme, just a one-off.

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-But there's your wife.

-Nobody will talk to HER.

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She hasn't left the house since Munich.

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I think it's very much my favourite programme,

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and I think everybody will enjoy it. I hope they enjoy it.

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It was great fun to do.

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# Who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler,

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# If you think we're on the run?

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# We are the boys who will stop your little game

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# We are the boys who will make you think again

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# Cos who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler,

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# If you think old England's done?

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# Mr Brown goes off to town on the 8:21

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# But he comes home each evening and he's ready with his gun

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# So who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler,

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# If you think old England's done? #

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Platoon, stand at ease!

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Atten-SHUN!

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-Try and do it with the others, Jonesy.

-Sorry, Sergeant. Sorry.

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-Thank you, Wilson.

-Aye, sir.

-Stand at EASE!

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I know what's happening, sir.

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You see, you're at that end of the line, and your voice of command

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takes time to travel through the air.

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Yes, well, something like that.

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Perhaps if you were to nod your head, sir,

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he might catch on a bit quicker.

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Yes, sir. If you nod your head, you'll not find me wanting.

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We can't get involved in all that.

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-Now, pay attention.

-HUP!

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-What's the matter, Jones?

-You nodded, so I sprung to it, sir.

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We're not doing that now.

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Now, I've been approached by some of the womenfolk.

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HUP!

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What is it now?

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I was standing to attention, so I eased myself, sir.

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The womenfolk want to join us in our fight against the common foe.

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-For making the tea, and the cocoa, etc.

-Buttons!

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I beg your pardon?

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Buttons. Buttons, sir. They could sew on buttons.

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Precisely. Yes, that's a very good point, Frazer.

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-Make a note of that, Wilson.

-Yes, sir.

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-HUP!

-Jones!

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Yes, sir, I... Oh, we're not doing the nodding now, are we? Sorry, sir.

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-I suppose there will come a time when he'll have to go.

-Yes.

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The new girl at the sweet shop is ever so obliging.

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Really?

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Well, that sounds like the sort of girl we want.

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Comforts for the troops(!)

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All right, Walker, that'll do. Let's not have any of that sort of talk.

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Sir, there's a lassie works for the Gaslight and Coke Company.

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She's a sonsie girl wi' big, strong thighs that....

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You're right there.

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-They're very strong when they've got strong thighs.

-Don't I know it.

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Anyway, bring them along tomorrow night. We only need a handful.

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And with proper training, they'll release us, the front line,

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the fighting troops, to grapple with the enemy.

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I don't think Jonesy and Frazer will have much energy left

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after grappling with those big, strong thighs.

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Walker, I shan't tell you again.

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# Run, rabbit! Run, rabbit! Run, run, run... #

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-Hello, Wilson.

-Good evening, sir.

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-How goes the recruiting?

-Very well. The men have brought quite a few.

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-Right, let's bash on. Bring them in.

-I'll find out who's first, sir.

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Right, now...

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-Sergeant Wilson, this is Mrs Fox.

-Mrs Fox.

-How do you do?

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-How do you do? Would you care to step this way?

-Ta, ever so.

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-What a very humid day it's been, hasn't it?

-Oh, yes, it has.

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-But you look so wonderfully cool.

-Oh!

-Yes, you do. You really do.

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-This is Mrs Fox, sir.

-How do you do, Mrs Fox?

-Nicely, thank you.

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Mrs Fox is one of my most regular customers, sir.

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I'm sure she'll give complete satisfaction, sir.

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Yes, thank you very much, Jones.

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How terribly rude of me! Do sit down. Do make yourself comfortable.

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-Thank you.

-Is there anything I can do for you?

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-Would you like a cup of tea?

-Oh, I don't think...

-Wilson!

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-The kettle's on. It's no problem.

-Wilson! Wilson, just a minute!

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I'd like a word with you outside.

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Excuse us, Mrs Fox.

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-Yes?

-Look here, Wilson.

-Yes?

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-I know you fancy yourself as a ladies' man...

-What?

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The women will be subjected

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to the same discipline as the men, so let's start as we mean to go on.

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-Well, at least we can be polite to them, sir.

-I quite agree with you.

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But we don't need all this Jack Buchanan stuff.

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-Stick to the matter in hand, shall we?

-All right, then.

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-As you say, sir.

-Well, come on, let's get back.

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Sorry about that, Mrs Fox.

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-Now, the name was Fox.

-Yes.

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What's the Christian name?

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-Marcia.

-Marcia.

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What a pretty name!

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Do you really think so?

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-I do. It's one of my favourites. I do love that name.

-Wilson!

-Sorry.

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Mr Mainwaring, here's my address. I've put my age on the bottom.

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I was just telling Mr Mainwaring,

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I've put my age on the bottom.

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Occupation?

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Widow.

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Is that an occupation?

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-In Mrs Fox's case, I would say it was almost a calling.

-Wilson!

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Mrs Fox, would you like to join us?

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I didn't know you'd come apart!

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That's awfully good! Very funny, Mrs Fox.

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Don't you think so, sir? That's a very funny joke.

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I'll take that as an affirmative answer. Thank you, Mrs Fox.

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-Thanks ever so much, Mr Mainwaring.

-Let me show you out, Mrs Fox.

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Mrs Fox has got a very dry wit.

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-A what?

-A very dry wit, the way she comes out with the jokes.

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This is the young lady I told you about, sir. Ivy Samways.

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-Oh, yes.

-I think she's the one, sir, who is so awfully obliging.

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Yes, thank you, Wilson.

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-Jones!

-Sir?

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-You needn't stay.

-Right, thank you, sir.

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Now, then, Miss Samways... JONES CLUMPS HIS FEET

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You're a shop assistant, aren't you?

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Oh, get out, Jones!

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You're a shop assistant, aren't you?

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What's your address?

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SHE WHISPERS

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I beg your pardon?

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SHE WHISPERS

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I'm sorry, I still didn't quite catch that.

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-Jutland Drive.

-Oh, Jutland Drive. What number?

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SHE WHISPERS

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Hm?

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SHE WHISPERS

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27!

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27! Now, Miss Samways,

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I wonder what sort of a task we can find for you.

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Answering the telephone, do you think, sir?

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You're trying my patience rather far today, Wilson.

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-She could look after the secret files.

-Thank you, Miss Samways.

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Thank you.

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-A word, sir.

-Yes?

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The lassie from the Gaslight and Coke Company cannae be here tonight,

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sir, but she's very keen. Just what we need. A fine, firm-bodied lassie.

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Sonsie, you understand, wi' big, strong thighs.

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Yes, all right, Frazer. Bring her tomorrow.

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I'll do that, sir.

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This is a friend of mine, Mr Mainwaring, Edith Parish.

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Miss Parish. Have you an occupation?

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-Yes, I'm an usherette.

-Yeah, down at the Tivoli cinema.

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They're the ones with the torches.

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-You must see a lot of pictures.

-Yes, and a lot of other things.

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Now, where do you live, Miss Usher... Er... Er...Parish?

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Down Berwick Road. 35.

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-Berwick Road.

-Yes. I live with my dad.

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He's 6ft 3, so don't you go getting any ideas.

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That will be all, thank you, Miss Parish.

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I'll see she comes round tomorrow.

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(You shouldn't have said that.)

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-I don't think that's the class of girl we want.

-No, possibly not.

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-Any more?

-No, I think that's it.

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Send the men home. They had rather a late night last night.

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I'll sort some of this out.

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All right, sir.

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All right, well, thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

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KNOCK AT DOOR Come in.

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Captain Mainwaring?

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-Yes.

-I hear you need women helpers for the Home Guard.

-That's correct.

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-Do take a seat.

-Thank you.

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I've been told all about this platoon.

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I think you've done a wonderful job.

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We try to do our best for England in her hour of need.

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I'd love to help, just to feel that I was doing something.

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Oh, good.

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Your face is familiar. Are you a member of the golf club?

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No, I'm new here. Mother and I left London to escape the bombing.

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-I see.

-I'd love to have stayed, not that I could have done much,

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but just being there to show that wretched little Hitler

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we're not giving in.

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By Jove, that's the sort of talk I like to hear! What name?

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-Gray.

-Gray.

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-Christian name?

-Fiona.

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Fiona... What a pretty name!

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Oh, do you think so?

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-Yes, it's always been one of my favourites.

-Oh, thank you.

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Have you an occupation?

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Widow, I suppose, if you can call that an occupation.

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I think, in your case, Mrs Gray, it's almost a c...

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Widow. And the address?

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-31 Wilton Gardens.

-Oh, Wilton Gardens? That's quite close to us.

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Yes, I know. I see you go to the bank every morning.

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-Do you really?

-And how wonderfully punctual you are!

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-We thought you were three minutes late the other day.

-Was I?

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-No. The clock was wrong.

-I have to set an example to the youngsters.

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Oh, I do agree. All the old standards are declining so rapidly.

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Oh, they are. They are indeed.

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Yes, well, I mustn't keep you.

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Well, shall we say tomorrow night? We usually parade at seven o'clock.

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I can't wait to start.

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At the moment my life consists of coffee in Anne's Pantry,

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-and making the dahlias grow.

-Oh, I love dahlias.

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Do you grow them too?

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Unfortunately, no. My wife says that they encourage the earwigs.

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What a shame! But she's quite right.

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Captain Mainwaring, may I ask you something awfully personal?

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-Yes?

-Do you always wear glasses?

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Yes. Yes, I always have.

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Would you take them off for a moment?

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If you wish.

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Oh, that's so much better!

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I think spectacles...

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Well, they take away the warmth in a person's eyes,

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just as a fireguard takes away so much of the heat.

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I suppose they do. I never thought of it that way.

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Hello, sir. Still here, I see.

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Yes. This is a new recruit, Mrs Fiona Gray.

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Fiona? What a pretty name!

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Yes, I think I got all the details. Shall we say tomorrow night, then?

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-I can't wait to start. Goodbye.

-Goodbye, Mrs Gray.

-Goodbye.

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-Now, there's a charming woman.

-I'm sure, sir.

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Just the sort of material we need.

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You're a pretty good judge of that sort of thing.

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Anyway, it'll be interesting to see how they all shape up.

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# Oh, no, it isn't the spring It's love in bloom... #

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Are you all right, sir?

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Have you lost your glasses?

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No, certainly not. Just took them off for a moment.

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-Let's get on with it, shall we?

-Right, sir.

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Platoon, atten-SHUN!

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-Welcome, ladies. LADIES:

-Good evening, Mr Mainwaring.

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Today I'll teach you the rudiments of foot drill,

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so we can turn out as a disciplined body of men and women.

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First, the "at ease" position.

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To stand at ease properly, you have the feet comfortably apart,

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about 18 inches.

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Place the right hand over the left over your bott...er,

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in the small of the back. Have you all got that?

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-Lot of red tape nonsense!

-No talking in the ranks, Mum.

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Pike, no talking in the ranks.

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To stand to attention, you place the weight on the right foot,

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raise the left...

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- I'm doing this in slow motion, you understand -

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..then bring it up to the...

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-Are you all right, sir?

-Yes, yes.

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Bring it up to the right foot, so.

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Now, here comes the tricky bit.

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At the same time, you put the hands down by the sides,

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thumbs in line with the seams of the trousers.

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-Permission to speak, sir?

-Yes.

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The ladies aren't wearing trousers, sir.

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Cos they're ladies, you see.

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Perhaps they could put their thumbs down the side of their knickers.

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Walker, fall out! Go and stand over there.

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You'll take no further part in this.

0:19:160:19:18

I didn't say nothing, did I?

0:19:180:19:21

-Let's try that. Give the order, Sergeant.

-Platoon, atten-SHUN!

0:19:210:19:26

No, no. That was very sloppy.

0:19:280:19:32

-Not you, Mrs Gray. That was very good.

-Thank you.

0:19:320:19:37

Now, I want you to stand upright, stomach in, chest out.

0:19:370:19:41

Not you, Mrs Fox. That's very good.

0:19:410:19:44

Stand at...EASE!

0:19:470:19:48

Atten-SHUN!

0:19:500:19:53

Captain Mainwaring,

0:19:530:19:54

may I point out that Miss Ironside here is doing it very, very well?

0:19:540:19:57

Her legs are coming together with a firm, strong action.

0:19:570:20:00

Just you listen, sir.

0:20:000:20:02

Thank you, Frazer.

0:20:030:20:05

I hadn't noticed that that girl has got very big thighs, had you?

0:20:070:20:12

-A little bit on the long side, I'd say. That's all, really.

-Yes.

0:20:120:20:19

All right, everybody stand to attention.

0:20:190:20:22

We come now to the left and right turn.

0:20:220:20:27

To turn right, you swivel on the right heel and left toe, thus.

0:20:270:20:32

One, two.

0:20:320:20:35

One, two. One...

0:20:350:20:38

HUMS A DANCE TUNE

0:20:380:20:42

Walker! Walker!

0:20:420:20:44

You brace the thigh of the rear leg as you go.

0:20:480:20:51

That's right, lassies. Brace them thighs.

0:20:510:20:52

-I like to see them well braced.

-Frazer!

0:20:520:20:56

And you lift the left leg and bring the foot into the right one, thus.

0:20:560:21:02

Blimey, what a way to win a war!

0:21:020:21:04

The captain knows best. You ought to listen.

0:21:040:21:08

Godfrey, look to your front. Stop staring at the ladies.

0:21:080:21:12

Quite right. He's woman mad, he is. Woman mad!

0:21:120:21:16

Walker, any more from you and you'll be sent home.

0:21:160:21:21

Right, everybody face the front.

0:21:210:21:23

Atten-SHUN!

0:21:250:21:28

Very good, Mrs Gray.

0:21:280:21:29

Left TURN!

0:21:310:21:33

-There's some confusion.

-Yes, I know.

0:21:350:21:39

It's the same as in the American Civil War they had over in America.

0:21:390:21:44

They had trouble cos the soldiers were country yokels,

0:21:440:21:49

and didn't know their, ahem, from their elbow.

0:21:490:21:53

They got an ingenious idea.

0:21:530:21:56

They tied some straw to one boot and some hay to the other.

0:21:560:22:00

When the commanding man wanted to turn left, he shouted, "Hay turn!"

0:22:000:22:04

Or, alternatively, "Straw turn,"

0:22:040:22:07

depending on whether the straw was on the left foot or right.

0:22:070:22:12

They organised themselves so all the men had the straw

0:22:120:22:16

on the left foot or... Is that any use to you, sir?

0:22:160:22:21

I think that's a good idea, sir.

0:22:220:22:25

You can say, "Ladies, what nice straws you're wearing."

0:22:250:22:28

That's it! Get off home!

0:22:280:22:32

What have I said?

0:22:320:22:33

Don't argue! That's an order!

0:22:330:22:35

# There will always be an England, While there's a country lane... #

0:22:360:22:43

HE HUMS TO HIMSELF

0:22:430:22:47

-Good morning, Captain Mainwaring.

-Good morning. What a surprise.

0:23:230:23:27

-Won't you join me?

-Thank you. I haven't seen you in here before.

0:23:270:23:32

Oh, I get in from time to time,

0:23:320:23:34

you know, when I can get my nose away from the grindstone.

0:23:340:23:36

-Yes, please?

-Ah, thank you.

0:23:360:23:38

Oh, no, none of that. I beg your pardon.

0:23:480:23:51

-No, thank you. Just coffee for me, please.

-Yes, just coffee, please.

0:23:510:23:55

-They once did Devonshire teas here.

-With jam and cream?

0:23:570:24:01

Oh, yes. Just after the First World War,

0:24:010:24:04

another chap and I took a spin out here just for a Devonshire tea.

0:24:040:24:09

I got the rough end of my governor's tongue, I can tell you.

0:24:090:24:13

He thought I'd toddled off with a bit of fluff.

0:24:130:24:16

It was all harmless fun then.

0:24:160:24:18

Yes, of course it was.

0:24:180:24:20

Mind you, we used to set the pace now and again.

0:24:200:24:23

Your face lights up when you laugh.

0:24:250:24:28

I think you're really a very jolly person at heart.

0:24:280:24:33

Oh! Yes, I suppose I am, really.

0:24:330:24:35

Not that a bank manager gets much time for joking and jesting.

0:24:350:24:39

-Separate bills?

-Yes, please.

0:24:430:24:45

No, please, have this with me.

0:24:450:24:48

-Good morning, captain.

-Hm? Godfrey, is it?

0:24:480:24:52

-I haven't seen you in here before.

-Oh, I come in from time to time.

0:24:530:24:57

I'm just on my way to the clinic. Have you mislaid your glasses?

0:24:570:25:01

No, just resting my eyes.

0:25:010:25:04

If you'll excuse me.

0:25:040:25:07

Charming man, that. One of my most loyal soldiers.

0:25:090:25:12

They're all wonderful.

0:25:120:25:15

Captain, I haven't seen you here before.

0:25:150:25:18

Oh, I come in from time to time.

0:25:180:25:21

Have you bust your specs? I know a fella with 500 pairs.

0:25:220:25:26

-Hardly used.

-I haven't broken them.

0:25:260:25:29

-Oh.

-Listen, you haven't seen me. I'm delivering some of the sweet stuff.

0:25:290:25:33

-Sugar?

-Shush! You haven't seen me.

0:25:330:25:36

Oh, by the way, I haven't seen you, either. You know what I mean?

0:25:360:25:43

Don't worry.

0:25:430:25:44

Heart of gold, that man.

0:25:460:25:49

Do anything to you... Er, FOR you.

0:25:490:25:52

Whereabouts in London do you live?

0:25:550:25:57

Near Regent's Park.

0:25:570:25:59

It was hopeless for mother.

0:25:590:26:01

They had the ack-ack guns there... Oh, that was careless talk.

0:26:010:26:05

Don't worry. Any secret is safe with me.

0:26:050:26:09

Morning, Mr Mainwaring.

0:26:090:26:13

Don't often see you in here.

0:26:130:26:15

I come in from time... Never mind.

0:26:150:26:19

I'll join you in a minute.

0:26:190:26:22

-Mrs Prosser, Captain Mainwaring.

-How do you do?

0:26:220:26:25

-This is Mrs Gray.

-How do you do?

0:26:250:26:28

Mrs Prosser's a very good friend of mine, but there's nothing in it.

0:26:280:26:32

-I see.

-Don't tell Mrs Fox, though.

0:26:340:26:37

I give her pieces for her cat and on her part,

0:26:370:26:40

-she keeps me company from time to time.

-Yes.

0:26:400:26:44

-Thank you, Jones.

-Thank you.

0:26:440:26:45

Sorry about all that. I had looked forward to a quiet chat.

0:26:470:26:51

So had I.

0:26:510:26:53

I must confess, I came in here deliberately

0:26:550:26:58

on the off-chance of seeing you.

0:26:580:27:01

I rather hoped you would.

0:27:010:27:03

Pike? What do you want?

0:27:110:27:13

Mr Wilson says he's sorry to spoil your tete-a-tete,

0:27:130:27:16

-but the bank inspectors are here and would you come at once?

-Yes.

0:27:160:27:20

I'm afraid I'll have to dash away. I'm sorry.

0:27:240:27:26

-Perhaps we could meet again, very soon.

-I'd like that.

0:27:260:27:30

-See you on parade tonight.

-Of course. I look forward to it.

0:27:300:27:34

Sorry I have to go.

0:27:340:27:36

Two coffees? That'll be eightpence, please.

0:27:410:27:44

All I'm saying is that Mainwaring's making a perfect fool of himself.

0:28:040:28:08

They came twice to see Forty Little Mothers, with Eddie Cantor,

0:28:090:28:14

and once to see Shipyard Sally, with Gracie Fields.

0:28:140:28:19

-They have coffee every morning.

-I haven't seen them.

0:28:190:28:22

They go to the Dutch Oven now. I have to fetch him if he's needed.

0:28:220:28:27

It's absolutely...

0:28:270:28:29

I tell ye, he'll ruin himself. Somebody ought to tell him.

0:28:290:28:35

-Hello, Wilson.

-Sir.

0:28:350:28:38

-Nearly time for parade?

-Yes, just a few minutes' time.

-Good.

0:28:380:28:43

-I've got an announcement to make to the Ladies Section.

-Ah, the ladies.

0:28:430:28:48

I've been meaning to have a word with you about that, sir.

0:28:480:28:54

-Some time.

-Yes?

-I know it's none of my business, sir,

0:28:540:28:57

but unless I say something about it, who will?

0:28:570:29:00

Look here, Wilson, if you've got something to say,

0:29:000:29:03

stop shuffling about from one foot to the other, and just cough it up.

0:29:030:29:07

Are you in some sort of trouble?

0:29:070:29:09

What? Oh, no, sir. Not at all. Good Lord, no.

0:29:090:29:12

It's just with the Ladies Section, do you think it's possible that...

0:29:120:29:17

some of us might possibly be making tiny little fools of ourselves?

0:29:170:29:22

Ah, I see.

0:29:240:29:26

-Thank you for your frankness, Wilson.

-Aye, sir.

0:29:280:29:32

Can't have been easy for you to speak to me on so delicate a matter.

0:29:320:29:36

No, sir, no. I thought it was for the best, you know.

0:29:360:29:41

-I am not insensitive to what people are saying, Wilson.

-No, sir.

0:29:410:29:46

I am therefore going to disband the Ladies Section,

0:29:460:29:50

with the exception of a few special helpers.

0:29:500:29:53

-I see, sir. Yes.

-All right?

-Mm-hm.

0:29:530:29:57

Well, that should settle your problem,

0:29:570:30:00

and keep Mrs Pike out of your hair.

0:30:000:30:02

Everybody here, corporal?

0:30:110:30:12

All present and correct, sir, except Mrs Gray.

0:30:120:30:15

Mrs Gray not here? Strange. Perhaps she's a bit under the weather.

0:30:150:30:21

Favouritism.

0:30:210:30:23

Ivy saw her going to the station with two heavy suitcases.

0:30:230:30:28

-To the station?

-Ten minutes ago.

0:30:280:30:32

Mrs Gray went to the station with two suitcases?

0:30:320:30:36

There's only one train now, and that's the 8:40 to London.

0:30:360:30:41

-Take the parade, Wilson.

-What?

0:30:410:30:42

Would you like me to make the announcement, sir?

0:30:440:30:46

-DOOR SLAMS

-Oh, Lord!

0:30:460:30:48

-Not too strong, please.

-Not much chance of that, dear.

0:30:480:30:52

-Anything else?

-No, thank you.

-Just tuppence, then.

0:30:520:30:55

DOOR OPENS

0:31:060:31:08

What's this? What's happened?

0:31:110:31:14

Nothing's happened. I'm just going back to London.

0:31:140:31:17

-For how long?

-I don't know. A month or two. Perhaps for good.

0:31:170:31:21

But you never mentioned it. You never even hinted at it.

0:31:210:31:24

-I thought it would be for the best.

-But I... I don't want you to go.

0:31:240:31:30

The whole pattern of my life has changed.

0:31:300:31:32

I just live from one meeting to the next.

0:31:320:31:34

I know. I'm the same. But it's the only thing to do.

0:31:340:31:38

People are talking.

0:31:380:31:40

-People always talk. Who cares about that?

-But there's your wife...

0:31:400:31:43

Nobody will talk to HER.

0:31:430:31:45

She hasn't left the house since Munich.

0:31:480:31:50

Be sensible, George. You can't afford scandal. There's the bank...

0:31:500:31:56

-Damn the bloody bank!

-George!

-I'm sorry.

0:31:560:32:01

Look, don't get that train.

0:32:010:32:03

-George, I must.

-I implore you, don't. We'll meet once a week.

0:32:030:32:09

You're making this difficult. I've made up my mind. It's the only way.

0:32:090:32:13

Victoria! Victoria!

0:32:130:32:16

There's my train.

0:32:160:32:17

Look, Fiona, I've never begged anything from anyone in my life,

0:32:170:32:20

but I'm begging you not to go.

0:32:200:32:22

-Finished with this chair, sir?

-Yes, take the damn thing!

0:32:220:32:24

-I'm sorry, George.

-I'll take that. It's heavy.

0:32:240:32:28

Can't we talk about this? Go tomorrow.

0:32:380:32:41

Walmington-on-Sea!

0:32:410:32:45

Make way for this lady, would you?

0:32:450:32:46

Hurry along, please!

0:32:460:32:50

Here, I'll do that.

0:32:500:32:51

Hurry up, or you'll be coming, too.

0:32:510:32:54

-Where can I get in touch with you?

-You won't be able to.

0:32:580:33:01

-Will you write?

-I don't know.

0:33:010:33:03

-After a little while, perhaps.

-Stand clear, sir.

0:33:030:33:05

-Pull those blinds down!

-Promise you'll write.

0:33:070:33:11

Very well. I promise.

0:33:110:33:13

WHISTLE BLOWS

0:33:130:33:15

-Make it soon.

-Goodbye, George.

0:33:150:33:20

(Goodbye, Fiona.)

0:33:200:33:21

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