28/06/2011 EastEnders

BABY CRIES

-KNOCK AT DOOR

-Come in?

Fresh pair of hands?

Yeah, please.

Hey, come on, big fella.

Whoa, you need to give your mum and dad a bit of peace,

Michael?!

-Michael?

-Shhh, stop it!

-He's sleepwalking! It's the second time he's done it this week!

-Shouldn't we wake him up?

No, no! You can't cos they can have fits or heart attacks or something.

What shall we do?

Go and pull his pyjama bottoms down!

-You can't do that!

-You can, he'd do it to me!

CHILD CRIES

OK. Just make sure he doesn't use the sink as a bog....again. OK?

Roxy! Don't leave me with him!

Come on... Come back upstairs.

That's it. OK?

Hey, hey!

Michael!

Michael!

It's OK. You're sleepwalking.

You've had an accident.

Come and sit down. Take a chair.

OK, hold on a second.

Let me look at your finger.

What did I do?

I don't know what's worse...

the shards of glass or the bite marks.

LOUD MUFFLED MUSIC

BABY CRIES

What?! This is a wind-up!

I'm sorry, mate.

Alfie?

This has got to be a wind-up.

Alfie, Alfie!

Jean, keep your voice down!

In case they don't like getting wet?! This better be good.

-Listen, calm down, OK! What kind of burglars play music?

-Crazy ones!

Jeanie, you stay upstairs.

We'll sort this out.

No chance.

-Tyler?!

-Your music is well lame!

What a racket! Alfie, how do you turn this off?!

All right, I've got it, I've got it!

-I thought I gave you money for a cab home?

-What do you think

you're playing at, you ignorant pig?! I've only just got Tommy down! How did you get in anyway?

I never got out.

-Well, allow me...

-Sorry, Kat, I'm all right really, ain't I, Dad?

-All right, darling?

-Get out!

-Right, party's over now.

-You're bang out of order.

And you're s'posed to be looking after the Emporium...

Look, Kat, I'm sorry for waking the baby.

-Must still be tough, what happened.

-You remember something from last night.

That woman's wrong in the head living here.

She's going to get sent down.

Well, I hope they throw away the key.

Tommy's lucky having such a fierce mum.

-I reckon Tyler's right.

-I reckon Tyler's pushing his luck.

Everything OK?

Tommy's finally stopped crying.

Cos he knows his Uncle Tyler's here!

-Can I see him?

-Maybe when we've had some more sleep.

And you've got some more clothes on.

Well, while I'm waiting, might as well get a round in.

Do you know what time it is?

Dad. Me and Alfredo, we've got a lot of catching up to do.

You've got a missus, a baby you nearly never had. Mate, you are a local hero

I want details.

-Three coffees coming up.

-Irish ones?

-Oi...

-Your bed on fire or what?

-Could say the same about you.

-Was hoping somewhere'd be open for some cigs.

-Be the death of you.

-Got to have one vice.

You OK?

I just get out a bit quicker, now that Ben's not around to hog the bathroom.

One day at a time, eh?

-See ya.

-See ya.

So what's been happening on planet Tyler that's kept you alive for so long?

Skills, fellas! I've virtually got a degree in mixology.

Whatever that is. You can get an O-level in surfing these days.

-What's an O-level?

-You've got one. For cheek.

Right. It's all about lining it up, the angle, the prep, like Cole to Keane...

Right, Cole to Keane.

You donkey!

-Typical West Ham.

-Oi!

-At least we know Tracey's job is safe.

-Shame...cos...

I could do with lying low for a bit...

How much is this lot going to cost me?

-Early birds?

-Couldn't sleep last night, thinking about my empire.

I've come in and the freezer's packed up.

-You checked the fuse box?

-That's, um...

I've got asthma.

-Sorry.

-You and her have got more in common than you think.

What you doing in so early? You're not due in till eight.

God knows why I got the job in the first place, eh, Shirl?

To keep you on the straight and narrow.

Well. Ta.

First time I give you and Anthony some responsibility, and look what happens!

Look, I've been getting under Anthony's feet.

And I missed my pops! I'm a family man.

Talking of which, where did Michael disappear to last night?

-He just took off.

-Have I got all this to come then, eh?

Tommy'll be a happy chappie. He'll take after his old man.

Yeah, I can just see him wearing one of your brother's sharp suits.

What?

You ain't told him, have you, Eddie?

I'll leave that one with you, mate.

Dad, are you serious?

Michael's the father?

-Alfie's a diamond.

-Yeah, he is.

This is wet.

Michael dropped a drink on there.

He was sleepwalking.

It was a bit weird.

Why didn't you wake me?

Cos I didn't think both of us should have a bad night.

So he's up to his old tricks then.

-What do you mean?

-My mum used to call him Midnight Michael.

Used to do loads of weird stuff. Used to try and get in bed with her.

Wake her up, when she was already awake.

Poor Roxy.

-Babe, what's that?

-Notes for a plea of mitigation.

I don't think they're going to take personal circumstances seriously.

This is going to go in your favour.

Everything you've been through.

Everything that's happened to us. Any judge with half a heart will go lenient.

I just think it makes me sound really messed up.

It would mess anybody up, this!

But this is all about you deserving a good life with me.

Starting again. With the right dosh, a QC can make that happen.

I think Roxy's already paid a lot of money for that lawyer.

-We can't ask her for more!

-Just leave it with me.

Jack...

They're going to go light on you, babe. Cos we've got plans. Haven't we?

-VOICE MAIL:

-'Janine, can you get my satsumas?

'Oh, and it's your turn to buy the takeaways, sponger...'

'Janine, can you get my satsumas?

'Oh, and it's your turn to buy the takeaways, sponger...'

SMOKE ALARM BEEPS

Good to see my money's in safe hands, ain't it?

Some people like crispy sausages.

Oh, my hero.

Oh, look at him, Bruce Willis in Die Hard.

-He's got hair like Bruce Willis.

-You two, who'd have thought?

-Where's Bruce's lunch and dinner?

-Why, you not coming home later?

Bruce's got to save America from the Russians. OK?

-Yeah.

-I could always take on another job, you know...

-What do you want to do that for? Last time you did it, you nearly blew the place up!

-That was Nick Cotton!

Anyway, we'd be like Laverne and Shirley.

-Living together, and working together?

-Killing each other.

Besides, you'd eat all the profits.

Suppose you ain't got that risk with Rainie.

Cos of all the fags she smokes.

And whatever else. Why her, Shirley?

Have you ever heard the saying keep your enemies close?

MOBILE BEEPS He's left it.

Idiot!

'Hey, I know you're really down about Ben today,

'but stay strong.

'Give me a call as soon as you're free.

'I need my one-to-one Phil time.

'See you later.'

Just going to the Mini Mart, want anything?

No, thanks. I've got everything I need.

OK, see you in a sec.

There's no liquid cash in the business.

-You buy my share off me.

-I don't want to!

-No. I want you as my partner.

-This is for Ronnie.

-Does she want it?

-Of course she wants this.

-Ask Roxy.

No! All right, I'm her husband. I want to provide for her.

Good for you(!) But you can't have it from here, Jack.

What's the matter with you?! Why don't you go sleepwalk off a cliff or something.

I'll get the money myself.

Rainie's gone on another break!

The job's yours, Hev. I don't think Rainie's going to be around much longer.

Oh, thanks, Shirl!

You want to watch that one.

-Hi.

-Hi.

That's for Roxy.

-Cheers.

-She not in?

Thought you two were telepathic?

Just she normally leaves it on the door step till it goes off.

That's about as public as I can go.

You're going to have to get used to being out and about

if you're going to get this top-dollar QC.

Who told you about that?

Jack. But it's cool.

He's adamant about it. Thought you were as well.

-Just don't think we can afford it.

-Can't put a price on freedom.

How's your finger?

Bet you and Roxy have been having a right old laugh about this.

We've all got our demons. It's how you handle them.

Just a stupid habit.

You know, when Danielle, my daughter, died,

I kept having nightmares, panic attacks...

..because I couldn't believe what my dad was capable of.

In the day it's easier to block out.

But it creeps up on you at night. You've got to cope.

It's going to get easier. That's what everybody said.

How can it get easier?

I've been a mum twice and I've failed twice.

I couldn't even protect my own children.

It's never going to go away, is it?

No. It doesn't.

Phil?

Where the hell are you?

I'm waiting so we can sort this through.

Why did you put this into my head?!

If you haven't scored by now, don't.

Right? Just don't.

-Surprise!

-Oh. It's only Ja-MEAN.

Where's Dad?

All right, I'd be disappointed to see me too.

But now we can all get excited together! Yay!

What game should we play?

Why aren't you sad?

Because my brother's coming home.

If my Nana Pat had died, I wouldn't want to play games. Or have a cake.

Well, it could be sooner than you think, if Nana Pat stops taking her heart pills...

Isn't that typical of you, Janine, scaring little children?

I heard Nana say on the phone that she wouldn't put it past you,

cutting the brake pipes on Lydia's wheelchair.

Kids, the icing won't finish itself, will it? Go on.

That means she's going to have a quiet word.

I thought you'd be feeling guilty by now.

-And wrong.

-I stand by every word I said.

-And I bet the poor old girl's looking down on us right now...

-Hello, "poor old girl".

..regretting the day she decided to get back in touch with you.

-Please, Pat...

-Hop it.

You're not welcome here.

Ricky'll believe me.

Oh, no, not after I've had a word!

Not if I get there first!

Janine!

Look who I found loitering outside.

-Amy in her room?

-Mm-hmm.

At least hear me out.

Let me buy you a drink.

I could be your punchbag if it means we get to move on.

I could take some blame, anything.

Just to get my family closer now that we've had some distance.

I heard Jack.

-You been sleepwalking again?

-What?

-Just drop it.

-It was the only time you'd let me be your dad.

Bringing you back to bed.

-Keeping you from harm.

-Yeah, well, you've had plenty of practice with your other kids.

I won't give up.

Eddie. See you in the Vic later maybe, yeah? Go somewhere?

I'll make it up to you.

-I doubt it.

-For yesterday.

Hey. Look, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry I've been so busy but the decks are clear.

And I think that tonight we should just go out and get really hammered.

-I've just had a bath.

-So? Get dressed!

-I'm not really in a party mood.

-Yes, you are, OK?

We'll go to the West End.

These might be your last days of freedom.

We don't know what's going to happen.

Come out with me, Ron, please.

# Beauty's where you find it...

# BOTH: Strike a pose! #

See!

Come on, come on, come on, come on!

I need to sleep.

Fine.

It's my fault, ain't it, for letting Michael escape last night.

Ricky, will you come and see me straight away?

Don't go to Pat's cos we're having a welcome home party for you at mine.

And don't even call her,

cos it's going to be a surprise for the kids! All right, Bye.

What's wrong?

Bit too much.

Please don't judge me, Shirl.

I've had a...had a bad day, big pressure...new job.

I really need to see Phil, please.

Be my guest.

ROWDY SINGING

Right, here we go, it's called Hawaii Two...

Me and him, that is.

..Big O, cos, ladies, it hits the spot.

-Yes, please!

-It's a free one, cos it's BOGOF.

Well, where's my free one then?

Buy one, get one free, as in a free kiss.

I've flossed, come here!

Go on, Mo!

'Ere, bruv, bit early for you, innit?

Thought you only come out in the dark! I Am Legend!

Nurse, my sides(!)

-Excuse me...

-Hello, girls, welcome to the Queen Vic.

We are serving up today Hawaii Big Two O, mixed by my very own Tyler Moon!

So he is here then?

Er..no. He was here.

But he's just popped out.

Oh, well, can you tell him that Kelly said all's forgiven?

-Course I will, sweetheart.

-Kelly...

Is it hell all forgiven!

That is from me...

LAUGHTER

That is from my big sister...

And that's another one from me.

That is from our little sister. You three-timing rat.

I was going to break it off with all of ya.

You do know who our brother is? Cleaver Joe?

You tell Clever Joe, if he wants to speak to my son, he can come and ask Eddie Moon's permission.

Bye-bye.

Kat, it's a big ask, but can Tyler stay a couple of nights?

He'll do any jobs you want him to?

Won't be for long, will it? And look at the birds he pulls in, eh?

All right. He can bunk in with Nan.

-You and me then. Where d'you want to go?

-Forget it.

Wouldn't want you to leave Tyler defenceless for five minutes.

-Jack!

-What?

The gym can cover a couple of grand, all right.

Whatever it takes to ease Ronnie's sentencing.

It's what she wants.

I knew it was a good idea, going into business with you!

Just don't tell Ronnie though. Don't tell anyone. I don't want it getting back to Kat and Alfie.

I know how important she is to you.

I won't.

Thanks, man.

All right.

DOOR SLAMS

Look what I found kissing the pavement.

-What's happened?

-What d'you think happened?

-You never turned up.

-Where?

-She don't know what she's talking about.

You won't see her again, Phil. Look at her!

Why didn't you return my calls?

What you talking about? I can't find my phone.

You said we'd meet up.

-For one last blow-out! Where were you?!

-I never said anything!

Well, guess what, she's taken a load of crack and she's off her head.

Yeah, that's right(!) I took a load of crack.

This ain't a counselling session.

I've taken it from the Arches.

I got drunk waiting for you to call me.

I'm just returning it. I'm sorry to disappoint you, Shirley.

-You set this up?

-What if I did?

It's only a matter of time before she caves in. So I just speeded things up.

-You're worse than a pusher on the street!

-She wants you, Phil!

She's not going to stop until she gets you. This counselling thing, it's a smoke screen!

-I need the support, all right!

-And don't she know it!

I wonder what you would do if I was having cosy chats with someone I used to sleep with.

No matter where she is, you're always there when she needs you.

Here's the coroner's report! All you have to read is two little words - Natural, causes.

-You think this gets you off the hook, do you?

-Yes!

-Of course, it totally, utterly and completely clears me!

-That's all you're bothered about?

No! Ricky, we lost our granny.

-To natural causes! How can you even accuse me?

-Very easily.

You are the only one I've got, who...

-That's what Grandma Lydia thought about you.

-Please just stay! Please?

-Have a drink. Let me explain.

-Everything that comes out of your mouth is a lie, ain't it?

I really don't want to be on my own tonight. Ricky?

Rainie...

Rainie, you haven't, have you?

Life's bad enough without the come-down.

You should get to bed.

Little bed in my sister's little spare room.

Perfect husband cooing over a perfect toddler.

Two beautiful daughters adoring her.

Ex-husband lusting after her.

-Queen of the salon.

-Come on,

you've got loads going for you.

Only when I get some attention from you. Shirley was right.

You've been strong, haven't you? You should be proud.

Can't wait to tell Tanya that I got sacked, with my head held high.

I thought...

that you'd given in, but... Ben will come back.

Course he will.

If Shirley wasn't that desperate, she wouldn't have done this.

Having someone love you that much...that's everything.

So who am I to interfere?

I'll add "losing my only friend" to that list for Tanya.

Rox. Thanks for getting us Ronnie's lawyer.

I've got the best of the best too, now.

S'all right. D'you need more money?

Nah. The business has got it covered.

Good! Good, and Michael's all right with that, is he?

Well, I didn't ask him.

The accountant, he OKed it.

Insurance policy. For her and for me.

And for me.

Jack, is everything going to be OK?

I'm sorting it, aren't I?

DOOR OPENS

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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