Episode 2 Let's Sing & Dance for Comic Relief


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Episode 2

Among the celebrity acts competing are the stars of Casualty and Holby City, quiz geniuses the Chasers and new boy band Boys Allowed.


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Welcome to Let's Sing Dance for Comic Relief for Comic Relief. Here

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are your hosts, Mel and Sue! Oh, there you are, there you are!

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Welcome along. I tell you, what an introduction that was. I think I

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have that cold sores on my buttocks. Kicking off your Saturday night in

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style with a brand-new line-up of stars to dance and sing their hearts

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out. Tonight there are two places in the final to fight for.

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So let's see who'll be electric boogalooing,

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harmonising and maybe even doing the 'robot' for your votes.

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Tonight, the stars of casualty and Holby City. A new girl group in town

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like no other, boys in town. A West End boy showing his talents,

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EastEnder style Danny-Boy Hatchard. Proving they can sing as well as

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stance, James and Ola Jordan. And finally, finding their dreams

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Somewhere Over The Rainbow, quizzing superstars the chasers.

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And reports from Emeli Sande in Uganda and Billy Connolly right here

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in the UK. All that and an exclusive

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performance from Louisa Johnson and from Amanda Holden in Stepping Out.

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To Add A Cherry... I Went Overboard With The Celebrities. We Have A Very

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Special Panel. We've got a very special panel -

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Russell Kane, Claudia Stroke the aura. I'm going to stroke

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the actuality. Hope you are in the mood for classic Saturday night

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entertainment. Mr Mel -- Mr Khan, you look happy to be a

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tonight. I'm just happy to be out of Birmingham! Look, this is for

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Claudia This is for you. Some onion bhajis for you. There we go! Share,

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share! Over ?3. There we are, very nice, there we are. Khan Mr, did Mrs

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Khan make these? Don't be ridiculous! Claudia, so nice to see

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you. So nice for having me, with the ourselves. And we have a full bar

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say. I thought this was a documentary series, I'm still in

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shock. We're waiting for our acts backstage you are nervous and hoping

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not just to impress them but you at home as well. That's right...

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LAUGHTER Two acts will make it through. The

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winner of the viewer vote on the panel choice. You can vote with your

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favourite iPhone and mobile... Or... They are very dry, very dense. The

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phrase viewer vote is hard to say with half an onion bhaji in your

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cheek. You can also vote for free, yes free, online. All you have to do

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is sign in and register to vote now. The vote will open... Not now. There

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is no moisture to be had in my body! Absolutely... One for each cheek,

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there we go. What! Does anyone have a flagon of H2O? It's everyone's

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favourite doctors, casualty and Holby City actors.

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Casualty and Holby...? Is there a doctor in the house? Not you, a real

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doctor. I've lost three -- as the three most

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important members of staff at this hospital we've been asked to perform

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an Let's Sing Dance for Comic Relief for Comic Relief. We'd lie if

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we said we weren't worried about how people will cope when we are away.

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The hospital doesn't run itself, you know? Hello, casualty. Relax, I've

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been doing this for years. Lots of damages? We understand their

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concern. We are integral to the smooth running of Holby City but our

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patients need not worry, we have a plan. It's taken a while to find the

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right people but we've managed to organise cover for when we are away.

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The hospital is going to be in extremely safe hands. Hello,

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Casualty? Relax, I've been doing this for years. You won't feel a

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thing! Don't worry, I'm here now, everything's going to be fine.

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Everything is going to be fine. That's better, isn't it?

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Performing Bruno Mars' Uptown Funk, it's the cast

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# I'm too hot (hot damn)

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# I'm too hot (hot damn)

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# 'Cause uptown funk gon' give it to you

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# Saturday night and we in the spot

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# Don't believe me just watch (come on)

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# Uptown funk you up # Uptown funk you up (say what?)

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Gang... Amazing. You guys look like you need a defibrillator. It was

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intense, very intense. We need oxygen. Well done. What's the

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prognosis? What a way to start the show. You have funked us so hard, my

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auntie's hip has probably popped back in. What a way to start the

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show. Good luck to anyone following that, it was fantastic! As three got

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so overexcited, your voices were fantastic, the dance, you looks like

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you are having a good time, we adored it. Congratulations. You're

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through, you won! Absolutely superb as hospital staff, these three are a

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credit to the NHS. They really are. I'm so glad you are here, can you

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just checked on one of my bunions, please? If the stars of Casualty and

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Holby City gives Purdue Saturday night Fever rising and you want to

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make an appointment with them,

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then pop off your bra and pants, get behind the screen

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and take notice of these Calls cost 15p plus your

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network access charge. The vote opens after all our

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acts have performed. Please don't vote now as it

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won't count and you may be charged. You can also sign in or register

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to vote now for free online Huge love for the stars

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of Casualty and Holby City - all of our amazing acts are giving

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up their time for one main reason, to raise heaps of money for

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brilliant Comic Relief. It is easy PC to do your bit. All you need to

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do is... The money you raise goes directly to

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helping people here in the UK and in some of the poorest communities

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around the world, so please give what you can. All the information

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you need is going across my lower third right now. You must be 16 or

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over. Please remember to ask the person who pays the bill. If you

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don't know who that is, you are in the wrong house.

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And Gareth. It's Boys Allowed. Duncan, it's over. He is in the

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zone. Thanks, Gareth, good guy. When we got the call that Comic

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Relief wanted girls allowed to get back together for a one-off

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performance, we couldn't have been more excited. To be doing it for

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such an incredible charity is such an honour. We all feel so proud to

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have been asked. The only problem is, we're just so busy!

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It's fine though, I've spoken to the girls and we have a plan. We are

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going to book some standings and hope nobody notices. It worked on

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the N M as, twice! Hi John, it's Kimberly here. You

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want to get the band back together? Didn't we do a reunion just last

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year? Not like this one. Hi Duncan it's Kimberly from Girls Aloud. Hi,

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Kimberly. You're getting the band back together? Great, I will tell

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the boys. Maybe don't do that. I get it, you're keeping it as a surprise.

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Oh yes, it will definitely be a surprise. Getting the band back

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together? Yes! Getting the band back together? This is going to be

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amazing! Hi Gareth, it's Kimberly. Band? I was never in a band. I will

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take that as a yes. We're getting the band back together, or some! --

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awesome. Perfect, no one will ever know the difference.

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# Why don't you fool me, feed me Say you need me

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# C'mon and hold me, hug me Say you love me

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# Why don't you fool me, feed me Say you need me

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# Cos when you hold me in your arms I turn to slave

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# Cos if we party any more we'll start a fire of pure desire

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# The way that we talk, the way that we walk, it's there in our thoughts

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# The way that we talk, the way that we walk, so easily caught

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# The way that we talk, the way that we walk, it's there in our thoughts

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# The way that we talk, the way that we walk, so easily caught

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# Why don't you fool me, feed me, Say that you need me

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# C'mon and hold me, hug me Say you love me

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# Why don't you fool me, feed me, Say that you need me

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# C'mon and hold me, hug me Say you love me

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Wow! Yes. Come on over. Come here. They are on, they are off. Amazing.

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Lads, Well done. Lads... That is the definition of a mixed message right

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there, I'm loving it. You loo like my primary school teacher. We didn't

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want to tell you, Mel, but tonight, Mrs Woodall. Unnerving. Brill yanlt.

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You look great. Claudia, have all your boyband dreams come to few

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wigs? Gareth as Cheryl is intoxicating. You're coming home.

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No, very, very well done. It was fantastic. The choreography. The

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singing. Ben, yes - welcome. Was that enough to divert you away from

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the tupperware? Yes. I thought it was quite interesting, I have to

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say. All the boys together, having fun in unison. Reminds me of Friday

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night at the mosque - only boys allowed there, too! How many the

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chemistry between them? I'm know what this show is about. Boys

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dressed as girls and people paying to make it stop. It's like the lads

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running out of budget on an Amsterdam stag night. That is Mrs

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Woodall you are talking about. Respect for dantsing in heels. I

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know sister. So if Boys Allowed had you feeling

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something kind of ooh and made your heart go boom boom,

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then all the details Remember, you can't vote

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until we say otherwise someone Thanks Boys Allowed,

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please head over to the posh seats. And, please, don't think

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about splitting up just yet! Mrs Woodall off you go. Thank you so

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much. Don't you bust a move

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as still to come... Simmer crowd, I know. I Those

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shoulder blades know. Are poetry. Still to come: James and Ola who

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have been rehearsing in perfect harmony. The Chasers who are

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channelling their inner child at rehearsals. See what happens when

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three top comedians Shake It Off in style.

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# Shake it off # Shake it off

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#. Is Up next an actor and

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Walford's finest Danny-Boy Hatchard, who's already

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faced tough competition to get here in the form

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of a fellow EastEnder... Danny-Boy Hatchard! Singing and

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dancing! That's a lot of smoke. Danny, Danny, Danny Boy. He's gone.

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I can't tell you how chieted I am that I've been asked to do Let's

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Sing Dance for Comic Relief for Comic Relief. When the letter

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arrived, I simply couldn't believe it. Just seeing my name, it was... A

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dream come true. What? Me? I know Danny Boy was expecting to be

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invited but... They must have changed their minds. Is I actually

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haven't seen him in ages. He's obviously busy doing something else

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anyway. That's probably why he's not doing it. Singing and dancing is

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what I've always wanted to do. So the only big decision was, who do I

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perform as? But then I realised - it has to be... Elton.

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And now, performing Elton John's I'm Still Standing -

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# You could never know what it's like

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# Your blood like winter freezes just like ice

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# And there's a cold lonely light that shines from you

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# You'll wind up like the wreck you hide behind that mask you use

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# And did you think this fool could never win

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# Well, look at me, I'm a-coming back again

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# I got a taste of love in a simple way

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# And if you need to know while I'm still standing you just fade away

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# Don't you know I'm still standing better than I ever did

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# Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid

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# And I'm still standing after all this time

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# Picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind

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# I'm still standing yeah, yeah, yeah

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# You starting down the road leaving me again

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# The threats you made were meant to cut me down

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# And if our love was just a circus you'd be a clown by now

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# You know I'm still standing better than I ever did

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# Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid

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# I'm still standing after all this time

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# Picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind

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# I'm still standing yeah, yeah, yeah

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Danny, are you all right? Do you need a leg up? Are you all right,

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love? There you go. Danny Boy. Are you all right. How is the leg

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bearing up? I've never seen anything more energetic. You were a gazelle

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up there. Thank you. Would I get away from the lion? You would dazzle

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them with those jazz hands. Were your pipes calling, Claudia? Indeed.

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I thought you were magnificent. Had you to do all the singing and

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dancing. Then the end. It was fantastic. You and I were dancing.

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Loving it. A huge congratulations. You also win everything.

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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Mr Khan. A soapstar but surely a popstar in the

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making? Great choice of song, good singing and dancing. What a style

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icon Elton John was. Anybody who wears a suit, hat and glasses has

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got to be a style icon, right? Exactly! Russell, the real question

:24:46.:24:52.

on everyone's lips is - did he fall or was he pushed? Very good. Very

:24:53.:25:04.

good. Did you like that? Very clever, very clever. There's no

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answer. You were like a bee on a baroca. I thought you were going to

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mug yourself something rotten. You didn't, the vokals and dancing were

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amazing. Congratulations sunng, you did yourself PROUD! Thank you so

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much. Don't mug me off, mate. Come on. Hello, sailor.

:25:31.:25:35.

So if you want to see Danny-Boy Hatchard Still

:25:36.:25:37.

Standing in our grand final, then all the details are

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on the screen now - but you know the deal - the

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vote isn't open yet, so please don't try or you may

:25:43.:25:45.

The posh seats are filling up nicely.

:25:46.:26:03.

Well, our stars have certainly done their bit for Comic Relief,

:26:04.:26:05.

My friend sponsored me to do advance yoga for Red Nose Day you have to

:26:06.:26:21.

avoid Squashed buns. Do you remember when you made that battenburg and it

:26:22.:26:29.

tasted like... Sick. I'm off to spend a penny or a pound and you can

:26:30.:26:37.

buy one. Hold these will you, mate. We have sandwiches, crisps, sausage

:26:38.:26:41.

rolls. Everything you need for a Red Nose Day party. The classic Owe

:26:42.:26:50.

asignificance track. 1 -- oasis track. I'm starting to feel...

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Ropey. All the technical jargon for an abseil. Get fundraising. Get your

:26:59.:27:06.

free fundraising kit now: It's like being in Ryland's

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bathroom. I must collect my tooth brush.

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Right, three acts have performed, two belters to go.

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Our next act are a couple more used to high kicks

:27:27.:27:29.

than high notes, here hoping to show off both

:27:30.:27:31.

James Ola. James and Ola. They are good at this. What do you say we

:27:32.:27:45.

take this up a little. Meet me in the ballroom and bring the glittery

:27:46.:27:54.

clothes. Tonight... Two mammoths of the dance world return. For one

:27:55.:28:07.

night, and one night only, they are BACK! Lord and Lady of the Dance.

:28:08.:28:20.

Yeah, that's right, James and Ola, a life of dance and it's all come down

:28:21.:28:23.

to this moment. This is what we trained for. This is what we live

:28:24.:28:31.

for. We're here to dance and we're here to WIN. Weeks, months, years of

:28:32.:28:40.

gruelling training. The pressure is on. There's no room for mistakes.

:28:41.:28:46.

There's no room for mistakes. No going back. No going back. This is

:28:47.:29:00.

it. This is it. And tonight, they dance and sing. Singing! Singing!

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That's right - singing. I thought you said it's Let's Dance, you

:29:12.:29:16.

didn't say anything about singing? Well, next time you read the

:29:17.:29:19.

small-print. All right. Now it's going to be a disaster, isn't it? I

:29:20.:29:29.

can't sing. Oh, don't be like that. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Performing All

:29:30.:29:36.

About That Bass, it's James Ola. # Because you know I'm

:29:37.:29:41.

all about that bass # Yeah, it's pretty clear,

:29:42.:29:43.

I ain't no size two # But I can shake it, shake it,

:29:44.:29:58.

like I'm supposed to do # 'Cause I got that boom boom

:29:59.:30:02.

that all the boys chase # And all the right junk

:30:03.:30:04.

in all the right places # Yeah, my mama she told me "don't

:30:05.:30:11.

worry about your size" # She says, "Boys like a little more

:30:12.:30:14.

booty to hold at night" # You know I won't be no stick

:30:15.:30:20.

figure silicone Barbie doll # So if that's what you're into,

:30:21.:30:25.

then go ahead and move along # Because you know I'm

:30:26.:30:34.

all about that bass # Go 'head and tell

:30:35.:30:36.

them skinnies that # No, I'm just playing,

:30:37.:30:57.

I know you think you're fat # Every inch of you is perfect

:30:58.:31:00.

from the bottom to the top # Yeah my mama she told me,

:31:01.:31:05.

"don't worry about your size" # She says, "Boys like a little more

:31:06.:31:08.

booty to hold at night" # (That booty booty,

:31:09.:31:16.

uh, that booty booty) # You know I won't be no stick

:31:17.:31:18.

figure, silicone Barbie doll # So if that's what you're into,

:31:19.:31:24.

then go 'head and move along # Because you know I'm

:31:25.:31:31.

all about that bass Come on. Blow the nose. That is it.

:31:32.:32:03.

That is more velocity than I thought possible. Why do I know you will

:32:04.:32:08.

take those costumes home. I know it. I think you owned it before. James

:32:09.:32:13.

loves it. I have a new found respect for women. Oh, my God! It takes

:32:14.:32:20.

hours, doesn't it? It takes a long time to look this good, you know.

:32:21.:32:27.

What I will say is that performance broke several international

:32:28.:32:30.

treaties. We will leave that. I'm sorry. So sorry. Russell, was it all

:32:31.:32:36.

about the bass for you, how did it go? I've regressed. I'm sucking my

:32:37.:32:40.

thumb. I don't know what we watched. I'm sure it will be popular in Japan

:32:41.:32:46.

whatever happened. James went full Miss.

:32:47.:32:52.

Piggy that takes courage on TV. It was trippy, it was wonderful, please

:32:53.:33:00.

don't touch me. You mow than anyone know this pair of old. We know this

:33:01.:33:10.

can dance. What I'm in awe is I didn't know of James' beautiful

:33:11.:33:13.

singing voice. I wish that had been brought to my attention you would

:33:14.:33:19.

have been singing all day. Mr Khan went, "we need tea" he pulled out a

:33:20.:33:26.

thermos. You need refreshment. I found that very disturbing I must

:33:27.:33:30.

admit. That was the intention. I might do a little prayer, if you

:33:31.:33:32.

don't mind. Here we go. APPLAUSE

:33:33.:33:46.

There we go. We will take that to the lab. Don't touch that, trust me.

:33:47.:33:49.

If James and Ola had all the right junk in all the right

:33:50.:33:52.

places, well then that's a matter for a surgeon,

:33:53.:33:55.

but if you want to vote for them then all the

:33:56.:33:57.

details you need are on the screen now.

:33:58.:33:59.

Don't vote yet and do vote carefully.

:34:00.:34:01.

I was voted off last week and it's taken me

:34:02.:34:03.

a full seven days to get my security pass back!

:34:04.:34:06.

Put your hands together for James and Ola - off you

:34:07.:34:09.

If you had this lot in your pub quiz team,

:34:10.:34:26.

The Vixen, the dark destroyer, the Governess and the Beast, it's the

:34:27.:34:50.

Chasers. Maybe just down a little bit, that's the one.

:34:51.:34:55.

So... The Chasers are performing on Let's Sing Dance for Comic Relief

:34:56.:35:03.

with Comic Relief. I think if I'm honest, neither singing or dancing

:35:04.:35:07.

is really their specialist subject. And it's not like they can learn

:35:08.:35:11.

this stuff from books, you know what I mean?

:35:12.:35:22.

LAUGHTER The thing about talent is it so

:35:23.:35:29.

subjective. What one person thinks his low or

:35:30.:35:32.

for someone might think is absolutely brilliant. I personally

:35:33.:35:39.

think they're going to be great. Dancing... Yeah... They can

:35:40.:35:40.

definitely move. And singing... Well... These guys

:35:41.:36:01.

are geniuses. I'm sure they can... Is miming an option?

:36:02.:36:12.

Who am I kidding, the four of them singing and dancing together on live

:36:13.:36:23.

telly? It has disaster written all over it. And worst of all, they are

:36:24.:36:28.

doing the Wizard of Oz. Who's going to be Dorothy? !

:36:29.:36:34.

Performing a Wizard of Oz medley - it's The Chasers!

:36:35.:36:41.

# There's a land I once heard of once in a lullaby.

:36:42.:37:10.

# I could while away the hours, conferrin' with the flowers

:37:11.:37:15.

# And my head I'd be scratchin' while my thoughts were busy hatchin'

:37:16.:37:22.

# When a man's an empty kettle he should be on his mettle

:37:23.:37:33.

# Just because I'm presumin' that I could be kind-a-human,

:37:34.:37:39.

# I'm afraid there's no denyin' I'm just a dandelion,

:37:40.:37:45.

# But I could show my prowess, be a lion not a mowess

:37:46.:37:54.

# If ever a wiz there was If ever, oh ever a wiz there was

:37:55.:38:07.

# Because, because, because, because, because

:38:08.:38:11.

# Because of the wonderful things he does

:38:12.:38:13.

Let the chase begin, my pretties! Your scary, I don't like you!

:38:14.:38:53.

Amazing! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:38:54.:39:05.

Vixen... I sometimes think this show isn't camp enough, we need to do a

:39:06.:39:12.

little more. Look at you, there's Toto as well. Lies, that was

:39:13.:39:19.

spellbinding. Cracking, absolutely cracking. I believe we are not in

:39:20.:39:25.

Kansas, Mr Khan. Amazing, absolutely lovely. A round of applause! I loved

:39:26.:39:33.

it so much, such clever people, you can dance, clever people. You'd be

:39:34.:39:36.

very good at getting through emigration. Can I have a selfie? Of

:39:37.:39:46.

course you can. Here we go, there we go. Lovely. I will Snapchat you

:39:47.:39:55.

later! Very good. Russell? What do you think the wonderful, great

:39:56.:40:00.

wonderful Wizard of is Bradley will should make of that? Where did that

:40:01.:40:05.

voice come from? As soon as he started singing idol, this is going

:40:06.:40:06.

to magnificent. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:40:07.:40:12.

I associate myself with these people the geeks, nerds and knowledge

:40:13.:40:15.

hunters. Tonight they were liberated.

:40:16.:40:23.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Any thoughts?

:40:24.:40:25.

It doesn't have to be about the show? Or four of you were brilliant,

:40:26.:40:32.

your voices were brilliant, hair, make-up, costume, everything. You

:40:33.:40:34.

took our breath away. Well done! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:40:35.:40:40.

Even the governess almost broke a smile.

:40:41.:40:45.

There we go, she smiling. If you would like the Chasers

:40:46.:40:49.

performance all the way to the final,

:40:50.:40:52.

then find the heart, the courage All the voting details

:40:53.:40:56.

are on your screen now. But the vote isn't open yet,

:40:57.:41:00.

my little pretties, there is a pantomime somewhere with

:41:01.:41:02.

a Melanie shapes hole. Thanks guys, please, join all

:41:03.:41:10.

the other acts in the Posh Seats. All our star acts have now performed

:41:11.:41:13.

and just look at them. It's like the front row

:41:14.:41:32.

of the Brit Awards, viewed Panel, please offer me your thoughts

:41:33.:41:34.

on this evening's events? Russell? It's been a sublime display

:41:35.:41:45.

of wonderful imagery and James as well, James Jordan. It's been a

:41:46.:41:49.

fantastic night. Everyone's done something so different and I will

:41:50.:41:52.

need counselling and a leaflet after this.

:41:53.:41:57.

Utterly fantastic, and just to reiterate what you said before,

:41:58.:42:00.

everyone's come here working so hard for Comic Relief, so people might go

:42:01.:42:06.

mad at home. So... Extraordinary entertainment. Mr Khan? I thought it

:42:07.:42:14.

was... I had a lovely time. I thought it was very easy. If

:42:15.:42:19.

Strictly are looking for someone... I can do it! LAUGHTER

:42:20.:42:27.

That's what they think, but it's your vote that really counts.

:42:28.:42:30.

I guess there is only one thing left to

:42:31.:42:32.

voting is now open! # Call me, call me

:42:33.:42:40.

# Call me, call me #. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:42:41.:43:05.

And now, the news... This is getting serious...

:43:06.:43:15.

So serious... Are they thinking about you or us...

:43:16.:43:22.

If you'd like to vote, we literally had to do that. Tonight's winner...

:43:23.:43:31.

These bifocals are playing up again. Get the bill payer's position before

:43:32.:43:38.

and in advance of your call. Always, that standard stuff. You can also

:43:39.:43:44.

vote online for free. For absolutely nothing. Go to the BBC website,

:43:45.:43:48.

where you will also find full terms and conditions. The boat closes in

:43:49.:43:55.

about 30 minutes. 12 minutes and 50 seconds. You better be quick. Don't

:43:56.:44:04.

try vote if you're watching on demand because that's in the future.

:44:05.:44:10.

Beyonce has been spotted in public mistaking her own daughter for

:44:11.:44:15.

somebody else's. It turns out it was Destiny's child! LAUGHTER

:44:16.:44:27.

Now time for a quick reminder of tonight's stupendous performances

:44:28.:44:29.

What a cracking show it's been and, in a way,

:44:30.:46:07.

Well, except for the ones who don't win.

:46:08.:46:10.

Now whilst our performers head backstage to swap tights,

:46:11.:46:16.

here's a reminder of just why we are all here tonight.

:46:17.:46:19.

And that's to raise lots of money for Comic Relief.

:46:20.:46:39.

I've got cancer and Parkinson's and I need a haircut. But no, this is

:46:40.:46:45.

Bob we made a film about him. Loneliness was his enemy. One

:46:46.:46:48.

evening she turned round and she looked at me and she said, "where's

:46:49.:46:56.

Bob?" I'm Bob and the bottom dropped out of my world then. This is Jo she

:46:57.:47:04.

was diagnosed with dementia at 57 years old. It was a devastating

:47:05.:47:10.

discovery for her and her husband. I made an appointment with the GP she

:47:11.:47:16.

said, "unfortunately you've got early onset... Early onset

:47:17.:47:22.

Alzheimer's. " This is Margaret, struggling to cope with the loss of

:47:23.:47:26.

her husband, the love of her life. Where do you go when your soul mate,

:47:27.:47:33.

partner, lover is gone? There's nowhere. Nowhere to go. And you, you

:47:34.:47:40.

amazing people out there. Young, old and somewhere in between. Your cash

:47:41.:47:45.

helps people like this, who life has dealt a tough hand. I would ask you

:47:46.:47:50.

tonight to do it again or, for the first time. It's the first time you

:47:51.:47:56.

won't know me. I'm the comedian with the weird beard what once took off

:47:57.:48:04.

all my clothes for Comic Relief. But that's not what matters. What

:48:05.:48:09.

matters is you, tonight at home and this amazing power to completely

:48:10.:48:12.

change someone's life. To give them hope and happiness. I really hope

:48:13.:48:16.

you will find it in your hearts to give a quid or two to people like

:48:17.:48:19.

Bob. It will be simple and marvellous and you will be so proud

:48:20.:48:24.

of yourselves. Can be part of a life saving miracle tonight if you can

:48:25.:48:36.

part with a some bob. To donate: Thank you.

:48:37.:48:39.

Wherever you are in the UK, you are likely to be within 20 miles

:48:40.:48:51.

of a Comic Relief funded project, so the money you help raise really

:48:52.:48:54.

All the information you need to donate is on your screen now.

:48:55.:49:16.

Please remember texts will cost your donation

:49:17.:49:17.

plus your standard network message charge and 100% of your donation

:49:18.:49:20.

You must be 16 or over and please ask the bill payers' permission.

:49:21.:49:24.

For full terms and conditions and more information go

:49:25.:49:26.

Now, Mel's got something special for you - direct from the West End

:49:27.:49:31.

stage and here for one night only - it's the very talented

:49:32.:49:33.

Oh, my days. Quality has arrived in the Posh Seating area in the form of

:49:34.:49:39.

these guys. Amanda. Yes. Welcome all of you. Thank you. So welcome to the

:49:40.:49:43.

show. Tell me about Stepping Out? It's a comedy play about a group of

:49:44.:49:49.

women and one man, Jeffrey, Dominic on the end. They meet every Thursday

:49:50.:49:52.

for an hour's tap class. You get to know them throughout that

:49:53.:49:56.

hour. It's very, very funny. Dominic, are you the only chap in

:49:57.:50:00.

the show? Yes. Tell us about your character? Jeffrey, shipping and

:50:01.:50:05.

insurance man. That's about it. It's very bored. Extraordinary. I could

:50:06.:50:12.

talk about shipping for hours. I have been told not to. Presumably

:50:13.:50:18.

you all tap dance? No. Not at all We have it on our CV as good actresses.

:50:19.:50:26.

Nick is very good. Natalie is good. Dominic is from a showbusiness

:50:27.:50:27.

family. Well, off you go and get ready

:50:28.:50:34.

to tap the light fantastic ladies. Open now at The Vaudeville Theatre,

:50:35.:50:40.

in London's West End, please tap your hands together

:50:41.:50:51.

for the cast of Stepping Out. What a brilliant performance

:50:52.:50:54.

by the cast of Stepping Out there. Now it's time to find our

:50:55.:53:24.

what happened when our very own Russell Kane Shook It Off

:53:25.:53:27.

in a shopping centre with Katherine Ryan

:53:28.:53:29.

and Shappi Khorsandi. Listen, I had a call from Lenny

:53:30.:53:42.

Henry last night who told me there was a massive dance slot available

:53:43.:53:48.

for one person on Red Nose day. I think I should clearly do. I'm like

:53:49.:53:53.

the Canadian len Goodman. That settled. Richard Curtice said he is

:53:54.:54:00.

a fan of my dance moves. You might have to step back. I was called by

:54:01.:54:08.

Beyonce she Face Timed me and said she is talking about my performance

:54:09.:54:14.

on Let's Dance. I am he a talking about this, baby girls. Beautiful.

:54:15.:54:19.

There is one way to settle this. Dance-off. Who should we do. One all

:54:20.:54:28.

three of us can relate to. If I look at us, who do I see? Jay-Z. Amy

:54:29.:54:39.

Childs. She's not a popstar. I can do her. We can do the biggest star

:54:40.:54:47.

on the planet... Attention all shoppers, the store will be closing

:54:48.:54:49.

in - hang on. Is that Taylor Swift? # At least that's what people say,

:54:50.:55:11.

# In my mind sayin' it's gonna be all right

:55:12.:55:19.

# Cos the players gonna play, play, play, play, play

:55:20.:55:21.

# And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

:55:22.:55:24.

# Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

:55:25.:55:26.

# Heartbreakers gonna break, break, break, break, break

:55:27.:55:30.

# And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake

:55:31.:55:33.

# Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

:55:34.:55:35.

# That's what they don't see, mmh-hmm

:55:36.:55:55.

# In my mind sayin' it's gonna be all right

:55:56.:56:03.

# Cos the players gonna play, play, play, play, play

:56:04.:56:07.

# And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

:56:08.:56:09.

# Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

:56:10.:56:12.

# Heartbreakers gonna break, break, break, break, break

:56:13.:56:31.

# And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake

:56:32.:56:34.

# Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

:56:35.:56:37.

# Hey, hey, hey I shake it off

:56:38.:57:00.

Are we done? Let's go. Now I'm just cross-dressing in a shopping centre.

:57:01.:57:16.

Very strong, Russell. Very strong, very thong. A lovely parting image.

:57:17.:57:28.

I was lucky to come back from Kenya and Uganda, as funny as it is, the

:57:29.:57:32.

reason we are doing this is for Comic Relief. Please donate or I've

:57:33.:57:36.

done that absolutely nothing. Please. Thank you Russell. Everyone

:57:37.:57:40.

please donate, if you can, big or small, we don't mind. The vote has

:57:41.:57:48.

now closed. Coming up with an exclusive

:57:49.:57:57.

performance of her new single, How many admissions do you get a day

:57:58.:58:27.

for malaria? 50. Is that all children? Yes. Yaku is brought in by

:58:28.:58:34.

his mother. He is limp and unresposive. We made a diagnosis of

:58:35.:58:51.

severe malaria. He was severely ill. Eight-year-old Agnes is carried in

:58:52.:58:55.

by her father, Sammual, she is anaemic from suspected malaria and

:58:56.:58:59.

urgently needs a blood transfusion, but this hospital has run out of

:59:00.:59:08.

blood. The most important thing is to trans fuse. It's serious. One of

:59:09.:59:17.

the causes of mortality. This is the horrible reality of malaria.

:59:18.:59:21.

Sleeping under a treated mosquito net at home is the simplest and most

:59:22.:59:27.

effective way of preventing malaria. But the families of Yeku and Agnes

:59:28.:59:34.

can't afford nets. As the hours tick by all the parents can do is wait,

:59:35.:59:38.

and hope. In the two minutes it takes you to watch this film, a

:59:39.:59:44.

child has died from malaria. In another two minutes another child

:59:45.:59:47.

will have lost their life to this cruel disease. But it doesn't have

:59:48.:59:52.

to be this way. ?5 buys two mosquito nets. ?10 buys four. That's a whole

:59:53.:00:01.

family protected from malaria. So please, please, please give

:00:02.:00:04.

generously tonight and let's stop another tragedy before it happens.

:00:05.:00:05.

Thank you. To donate: I'm pleased to say that

:00:06.:00:22.

both Yeku and Agnes have recovered from

:00:23.:00:24.

Malaria and are now sleeping under mosquito

:00:25.:00:26.

nets thanks to your All the details you need

:00:27.:00:28.

are on your screen now. I know things are tough, but please

:00:29.:00:34.

give what you can. Time now for an exclusive

:00:35.:00:45.

performance from pop's Here with her new single,

:00:46.:00:47.

Best Behaviour, it's Louisa Johnson. # Give me your trust

:00:48.:00:50.

and I'll try not to break it # Ooh you got me on my

:00:51.:01:28.

best behaviour, I # Give me your trust

:01:29.:01:30.

and I'll try not to break it # Ooh you got me on my

:01:31.:02:27.

best behaviour, I # I know you've got

:02:28.:02:30.

a heart of porcelain # I'm trying not to

:02:31.:03:12.

crack it in my hands # Ooh you got me on my

:03:13.:03:17.

best behaviour, I # I'm on my best behaviour,

:03:18.:03:30.

I'm on my best behaviour Amazing, amazing. It reminds me of

:03:31.:04:27.

that pyjama party we had. With the barbecue? Yes.

:04:28.:04:30.

Gang, it's the moment you've all been waiting for.

:04:31.:04:32.

You have the obligatory red envelope, please. No. I believe it's

:04:33.:04:52.

heading in right now from the land of Oz.

:04:53.:04:55.

Well, I thought I'd get my money's-worth out

:04:56.:05:01.

Lesley, I take it, by the look of your face, you've been

:05:02.:05:05.

Can we have the envelope, my darling? The absolutely fabulous

:05:06.:05:13.

Lesley Joseph! Always in character, never off. Game

:05:14.:05:24.

faces on, exactly the same as my normal face. Time to welcome back

:05:25.:05:32.

our five star acts. These stars of Casualty and Holby

:05:33.:05:35.

City! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:05:36.:05:42.

Boys Allowed! Danny-Boy Hatchard!

:05:43.:05:55.

James and Ola! And the Chasers!

:05:56.:06:05.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE There they all are. Amazing.

:06:06.:06:15.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Earlier tonight this magnificent

:06:16.:06:19.

star act is danced and sang for you but only two can go through.

:06:20.:06:24.

Those with the highest viewer votes will have a place in the final and

:06:25.:06:28.

those who come second and third will face the panel who will choose their

:06:29.:06:32.

favourite. Load the dramatic lighting!

:06:33.:06:40.

Is this dramatic enough? That is highlighting something a bit

:06:41.:06:45.

weird... Lights up again please, lights up, that's not good!

:06:46.:06:54.

Now, we're just going to do these props. The British public have voted

:06:55.:06:59.

and we can now reveal the top three acts in the public vote.

:07:00.:07:04.

So, in no particular order, the first act is...

:07:05.:07:18.

Casualty and Holby City! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:07:19.:07:30.

I like that, shouting and then silence!

:07:31.:07:45.

The Chasers! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:07:46.:07:54.

And, finally... There is a lot of tension. In the top three, it is...

:07:55.:08:06.

James and Ola CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:08:07.:08:16.

I can't Berwick, we have to say goodbye to Boys Allowed and

:08:17.:08:23.

Danny-Boy Hatchard! You've been brilliant guys, you've

:08:24.:08:27.

been brilliant, thank you so much. After the posh seats, please.

:08:28.:08:34.

Boys Allowed! We will now reveal the winner of the

:08:35.:08:39.

public vote. The fate of the other two is in the hands of our panel.

:08:40.:08:47.

The winner of tonight's Let's Sing Dance for Comic Relief is...

:08:48.:09:01.

The Chasers! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:09:02.:09:07.

Congratulations! You're going to Oz, you're going to

:09:08.:09:23.

Oz! You are going all the way to Oz! Well done. Bye-bye!

:09:24.:09:33.

Listen, we look forward to seeing you in the final, guys. Off you go,

:09:34.:09:38.

you're going to Oz, you're going to Oz.

:09:39.:09:46.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE This is all going very, very well.

:09:47.:09:50.

This means there's just one place left in the grand final. Who will

:09:51.:09:55.

join the Chasers? Will it be James and Ola or the stars of Casualty and

:09:56.:10:00.

Holby City. It's down to the panel to decide. Before they do, here's a

:10:01.:10:03.

reminder of their cracking performances.

:10:04.:10:15.

# I'm too hot (hot damn)

:10:16.:10:18.

# So if that's what you're into, then go ahead and move along

:10:19.:10:36.

# Because you know I'm all about that bass

:10:37.:10:44.

As the screw all said to the peanut, it's crunch time. Who is it going to

:10:45.:10:58.

be? James and all adored or the stars of casualties and Holby City?

:10:59.:11:05.

-- all the stars of Casualty and Holby City. I need one name,

:11:06.:11:11.

pressure time. Mr Khan, with coming to you first. Who would you like?

:11:12.:11:15.

This is so difficult, who do I want in and who do I want out? This is

:11:16.:11:21.

worse than Brexit! I think... You both did very well, it was all for

:11:22.:11:25.

charity, but I need to look after my bunny and so it's going to be

:11:26.:11:31.

Casualty and Holby City! One-vote, vote for Casualty and Holby City.

:11:32.:11:39.

Claudia, a name please? This is tense but I work with them so I have

:11:40.:11:43.

do vote for James and Ola CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:11:44.:11:50.

Russell, it's down to you, who is it going to be?

:11:51.:11:56.

I feel I need to inject oestrogen just to look at James. It got me

:11:57.:12:00.

singing and dancing to the point where I need a doctor, need Casualty

:12:01.:12:06.

and Holby City...! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

:12:07.:12:12.

Thank you so much, you were amazing, you were brilliant.

:12:13.:12:17.

Well done, massive congratulations to the stars of Casualty and Holby

:12:18.:12:22.

City, through to the grand final. Sadly it is goodbye to James and all

:12:23.:12:31.

adored let's hear it for our acts. -- James and Ola Jordan.

:12:32.:12:37.

What an amazing night it's been, a massive bank 's to all our

:12:38.:12:41.

incredible stars and fantastic panel. We are back-to-back Saturday

:12:42.:12:46.

night with five more fabulous acts but right now we leave you with your

:12:47.:12:51.

winner was the ET also most thats. It's the Chasers! Crack it open.

:12:52.:13:02.

# There's a land I once heard of once in a lullaby.

:13:03.:13:27.

# I could while away the hours, conferrin' with the flowers

:13:28.:13:30.

# And my head I'd be scratchin' while my thoughts were busy hatchin'

:13:31.:13:37.

# When a man's an empty kettle he should be on his mettle

:13:38.:13:48.

# Just because I'm presumin' that I could be kind-a-human,

:13:49.:13:52.

It's great that you could come in for this, Lenny.

:13:53.:13:59.

Mel Giedroyc and Sue Perkins host as five celebrity acts sing and dance to iconic pop tracks, all in aid of Comic Relief. In each episode, two acts are put through to the grand finale, where viewers will vote for their champion.

Competing in this episode are the stars of Holby City and Casualty, quiz geniuses the Chasers, dancing stars James and Ola, EastEnders actor Danny-Boy Hatchard and new boy band Boys Allowed.

The judging panel is made up of Claudia Winkleman, Adil Ray as Mr Khan and Russell Kane, and there are appearances from Katherine Ryan, Shappi Khorsandi, Amanda Holden and Tamzin Outhwaite. Plus music from Louisa Johnson.