Episode 26 Antiques Road Trip

The nation's favourite antiques experts, £200 and one big challenge.

I'm going to declare war.

-Why?

-Who can make the most money buying and selling antiques as they scour the UK?

Very good.

-The aim is to trade up and hope each antique turns a profit.

-Oh!

But it's not as easy as you might think

-and things don't always go to plan.

-Push!

So will they race off with a huge profit or come to a grinding halt?

-Do you think I'd believe that?

-This is the Antiques Road Trip.

In a week that promises slightly dubious weather

but wonderful scenery and fabulous people,

the Antiques Road Trip comes to you from Northern Ireland.

Lough Neagh, the biggest freshwater lake in the British Isles.

-Did you know that, David?

-I did.

Sorry, I'd forgotten that you know everything.

It's here our antique ambassadors, David Barby and David Harper,

are about to charm a nation and hopefully make a profit.

Look at this. It's one of the most romantic places in the British Isles

and here am I with David Barby.

I mean, my life doesn't really get any better, does it?

-I hope your inclinations are honourable.

-Not at all.

Freelance auctioneer and valuer David Barby is affectionately known as Dolly,

not out of any resemblance, though, to the toy.

What are they for? I don't know.

He has a passion for antiques that began at the tender age of 12.

I've just asked what the bottom price is.

Not to be outdone, David Harper started collecting when he was just five years old,

or so he says.

I am a treasure hunter.

Today, he's living the dream as an antiques dealer, writer

and thoroughly good egg.

She's gorgeous and I wouldn't mind taking her home.

The two Davids are starting this contest with £200 each

and naturally, they're both hoping to have the luck of the Irish.

Are you going to try and beat me on this, Mr Barby,

or are you going to play the gentleman and just let me win?

I shall play the gentleman, always.

Do you think I'd believe that?

This week we're travelling from Northern Ireland,

heading south towards the county of Meath,

then across to the north coast of Wales

and once again heading south,

ending our trip in Llanelli.

Today, we're en route to the village of Moy

and our journey concludes with auction number one in Omagh.

As for our experts' mode of transport,

what could be more glamorous than a Triumph TR3?

If I was to close my eyes a little bit,

I'd think I was with some beautiful blonde.

-Indeed?

-Not for long but...

Known to the locals as The Moy,

back in the 1700s, this village was just a handful of cottages and a pub,

most of which are still standing

and have been transformed into an antiques business

that's been in the same family for three generations.

What's more, it has room after room of gorgeous collectables,

so what better place for our boys to make a start?

-David...

-Come on!

-David, best of luck.

Oh, sorry. Sorry. Best of luck. Of course.

Of course I mean that. BARBY GRUNTS

-Do you want me to help you out?

-Yes, thank you.

Anything to delay you.

Now, while David Harper gets Dermot to give him the grand tour

of what used to be the entire village of Moy...

Look at this. This is my idea of heaven.

..Lawrence, his father, is looking after our Mr Barby in the main shop.

Can you tell me the price of the Crown Devon?

-£220.

-Oh! Goodness me.

-For the two.

That takes up almost all my money.

In other words, time for a much cheaper plan B -

this Georgian window panel.

This is the one here.

It's an individual over-door, yes. That's a genuine Georgian one, yes.

So this would have been... Oops.

-That would have been across the top.

-Of course, yeah, yeah.

-Yes.

-So we've got quite a lot of damage here.

Yes, it needs some of the wood replaced, yeah.

You've got layers of paint, there.

So this is probably what? Regency, George IV?

Yeah, around George IV, yeah.

-So what's your price on it?

-£35.

-£35. Is that your very, very best?

-That's it, finito, on that one.

Is it? I rather like that.

For now, it's a strong maybe

because today, David Barby is a man with a game plan.

I'm looking for something that is unique,

unusual, quirky.

There's some decent stuff here. Lovely, lovely, lovely.

I'm happy if I just sort of play the middle ground.

I don't really mean that.

I'd love to win but it depends how the day goes by.

As for David H, his tactic is to spend lots.

-So this is an oil burner?

-An oil burner, yeah.

-Oil burner.

A good thing, in copper, bit of brass.

-Nicely patinated.

-That's right.

-Good thick glass.

-Imagine that illuminated. That, in a garden, would look the business.

-Yeah.

-Early 20th century.

-1910, something like that.

-It would be.

It has to be, yeah.

-What sort of money...?

-The trade price on that is 35 quid.

Can it be 30 quid?

-30 quid. Go on. Good luck with it.

-Good man. Nice to do a deal quickly.

Man after my own heart. Fantastic.

I love doing deals, Dermot. Show me some more. Let's continue.

Well, the boys are going great guns today

and across the courtyard, David B has already found something else,

though he has just one question.

-What are they?

-They're Scottish but I'm not sure what they were used for.

-They're both the same?

-Mm-hm.

-Yeah, two pieces.

-How much are they?

We'd do the two of them for £60.

-They're quite unusual.

-They are but I don't know what they're for.

And even more surprising, nor do I.

It's a chance that somebody will know at the auction

-but I think they're Churchill.

-Rubbish.

Probably dating from the early part of the 20th century,

so I think they're interesting enough.

-What's the best you can do on these, Lawrence?

-On these, it's £60.

-Oh, come on.

-For the two of them.

-This one's got damage.

-For the two, £50.

-I think you can afford to knock some more off

-because you don't know what they are.

-That's where the hidden value is.

Maybe these will make a lot more money.

-Would you do 40 for the two, please?

-OK, 40 for the two. OK.

-OK.

Can I pay for those later?

There might be something else here. I'm getting excited.

Someone else who's excited is David Harper,

who might just have found his next purchase.

So we have here a set of six, certainly 19th century, prints

but mounted in a really unusual way.

I love the shape of them and they could work -

you've got to use your imagination - in a modern room

with a little bit of regilding on the frame,

that would look really jazzy.

But proper things. 19th century. Probably 1860, 1880.

There's potential but they've got to be cheap.

Bear in mind there's six of them.

Oh, no, this is a very bad start to this conversation, Dermot.

The best I'll do for you is 50 quid.

50 quid.

Dermot, give us them for 40.

-45.

-Good man. Fantastic.

I love doing business with you. I love it.

Right, OK, another one in the bag. Show me some more.

My goodness, at this rate, the boys will be done in time for elevenses.

Actually, I could murder a biccy.

I've just spotted this, which I think is an interesting composition.

It's 19th century.

What I like about it is the feature of the woman

and then this figure going at an angle across, which is unusual,

as though somebody else is straining to look out from behind the curtain.

I rather like that. Oh, and of course, she has a naked breast,

so it may well have been put in an attic

rather than upset anybody's sensitive nerves,

because it has got an exposed breast.

Cleaned up, I think that would be quite good

but there's damage across here.

I would hope it would be round about £50.

Lawrence, I just spotted this as I came through the door.

I know it's got damage on it.

-What's the best price you can do?

-£40.

-£40.

-Mm.

-That's allowing for its condition and whatever restoration has to be done to it.

-OK.

-Lawrence.

-David.

-Thank you very much indeed.

-OK.

Right. Oh, I'm quite pleased.

Perhaps there's something in the air.

# I've heard people say... #

Because at this very second, David H...

# Too much of anything is not good for you, baby... #

..is also now thinking...

She's a bit of all right, isn't she?

..about naked women.

She's gorgeous. Not only is she lovely to look at because she's a lovely shape

-but she's very contemporary and you could put her...

-That's right.

-..in a traditional house and jazz it up.

-That's right.

-Couldn't you?

-Or a very modern place.

-Very modern, yeah.

This rather saucy painting, that has David so excited,

is an amateur copy of Daniel O'Neill's work,

an Irish artist now deceased,

though while the original did sell for 50,000 euros,

I think this canvas is worth a bit less.

Erm, what sort of money is she, then? I wouldn't mind taking her home.

-Say something like...

-30 quid? 20 quid?

-50 quid, 50 quid.

-Really?

-45.

-You couldn't put it on my bill at 20 quid?

-Say 30?

-25 quid.

-Let me take her home for 25 quid.

-OK.

Good man, good man.

Gosh, we're never going to stop. Come on, Dermot.

Let's go.

As for David B, he's done and dusted,

so that's one Georgian overlight, a pair of pottery figures,

possibly Churchill, possibly not, and one very tasteful nude.

-So what's the total?

-115.

-I'll give you 110.

-Oh, dear.

-110.

-OK, 110, OK, OK.

-Thank you very much.

Jammy old devil.

-I hope you do well.

-So do I.

So do I. Otherwise I'll be back.

Though for now, David's headed south.

His next stop is Milford,

a small mill town that used to belong to the McCrum family,

who famously produced some of the world's best Irish linen.

Today, their family home, although protected, lies derelict,

but their story is still being told, thanks to the Milford House Museum,

housed in what used to be one of the workers' cottages.

-Welcome to Milford House Museum.

-Thank you.

And it was founded by Stephen McManus,

whose family, back in the 19th century,

used to be weavers employed by the McCrums.

Where is your interest in this? Where did it all begin?

Well, it all began when I was 15

and I set up a charity called the Milford Buildings Preservation Trust

to protect and preserve Milford House for the benefit of the nation

and from that, the collection developed.

The family gave us back the remaining possessions that they had

and it was from them that the collection started.

The head of the family was Robert McCrum,

a man bordering on genius,

who, of course, pioneered a new type of linen - double damask.

When we say that Milford linen is superior to any other linen in Ireland or, indeed, in the world,

we're not joking.

-Why do you say that?

-If you look at this napkin here,

you can see that the design is printed on both sides of the fabric,

so it looks exactly the same on each side.

Because he invented it and he patented it,

he had the monopoly on the industry in Ireland

until he died in 1915.

Robert McCrum's design revolutionised the linen industry

and soon he had two factories and 1,000 employees,

who helped make him a very rich man.

But he wasn't the only member of the family to change the world.

For a start, his daughter Harriet was a founding member of the Irish suffragette movement.

This is a copy of a portrait of Harriet McCrum.

We can't say she was a great beauty - she wasn't.

She was close friends with Millicent Fawcett,

-who was a founding member of the suffragette movement in England.

-Right.

Both ladies preferred to do the hard work and let someone else take the credit.

And this magnifying glass here was a wedding present

from Millicent Fawcett to Harriet McCrum

and you can see it's inscribed,

"H McCrum with M Fawcett's love and care."

That's a lovely little present.

Meanwhile, Harriet's brother William was the black sheep of the family,

preferring to gamble in Monte Carlo rather than run a linen factory.

But he too has a claim to fame,

for in 1890, in the park just outside this museum,

he invented the penalty kick rule.

In the 19th century, there were no rules in football.

Games could last an average four days - four days at a time.

-An average of seven men died playing football a year.

-Really?

But when he invented it, the penalty kick was laughed at.

But he was a goal keeper and my theory behind it is

that he was very into acting and amateur dramatics.

Goal keepers don't do much in the game

-and so for a few seconds, he's the most important person in the game.

-Right.

-And if he wins the game, then he's even more important.

-Oh, right.

Today, he's even more famous than his father was.

-REFEREE'S WHISTLE BLOWS

-And naturally, if one visits this world-famous site,

how can you resist reliving a piece of footballing history?

Barby takes the run-up...

He kicks... This is...

GLASS SMASHING

..a criminal offence. Time to go, I think.

As for David Harper, he's gone well and truly off the beaten track,

to a place appropriately called Countryside Antiques.

Well... Oh, I can't believe it.

Full of fantastic stuff.

Absolutely and this unlikely shop is owned by Stanley,

who used to be a farmer but after a spot of heart trouble

decided to become an antiques dealer instead.

And then we got bigger and bigger as we went along.

-This is what happens.

-This is what happens.

-It's a disease.

It's worse than the heart disease.

It causes heart disease, this business.

Come on, then, show me. What have we got? Let's have a look.

Or more to the point, what hasn't Stanley got,

from Japanese Noritake to Mouseman furniture.

-That's not £100, is it?

-Well, it would be a deposit.

I'm afraid David Harper can't get any of it

at the rock-bottom prices he's so fond of.

They're quite interesting, aren't they?

I think they're Irish. I'm not 100% sure.

-Let's see. You could be right. Romany.

-They could be Romany.

If you trace the Romanies back, you actually get to India.

If you keep going east, that's where they started,

so they've always got that Indian sort of influence.

So it could be Romany.

So you carry two of them. What are you going to carry two of them for?

-Beer.

-Beer. One of them each.

-You and I could have a great party.

-It would be.

-Fill them up.

-Fill them up.

-What, I mean... There's a pair of them.

-There's a pair of them.

-What kind of...? What sort of...?

-100.

-100. Take 50 quid and be...

-I can't. I'd be happy to get 60 for them.

I'm getting no money out of them.

-Stanley, I'm going to give you £60.

-Thank you very much.

Thank you very much. They're fantastically whacky. I love them.

Love them. I've almost blown all my money.

Well, in that case, it's hats off to Stanley

and time for our esteemed experts to call it a day.

Did you spend all your money? You were going to do that, weren't you?

I do want to spend all my money. I want to blow every single penny.

As they sun hides behind several enormous grey clouds,

the two Davids are none the less excited about the day ahead.

All I can say is it's lovely countryside.

I think the only way to see Ireland is by open-top car.

This is the way to do it.

So far, David Barby has spent £110 on three auction lots

and still has £90 up his finely tailored sleeve.

David Harper, on the other hand, has gone a bit mad,

parting with £160 for four auction lots.

Mind you, he says he's determined to spend every penny.

Cheeky!

Is this your policy? You're going to blow it on each occasion?

I might. I'm going to try it this time on our first leg out

and if it all goes disastrously wrong, I may change tactic.

The boys' first stop today is Armagh,

known to many as the city of saints and scholars.

And that's a story which begins in the mid 400s

when Christianity first spread to Ireland

and St Patrick established his principal church right here,

thus making this the island's ecclesiastical capital,

although it's since been destroyed and rebuilt 17 times.

As for our story,

that begins a few streets away at the Shambles Market,

where David Barby is about to have his world rocked.

Hold on. Now, this is the first time ever

you've stepped onto the holy ground of a car boot. Am I right?

-I've been to one of these country house car boots.

-Yes.

-So I expect this is something similar.

-Very similar.

You might find some Rembrandts

-and some really good early George I oak furniture.

-Just what I want.

OK, good luck to you. You go in that direction and I'll go in that direction.

Whilst David's new to the cut and thrust of the car boot sale,

he's loving it,

approaching every nuance as if he's narrating a nature documentary.

Well, this is the most extraordinary place I've been to.

It's all at a car boot sale. It's amazing what's being sold.

And the people are so interesting as well.

They're all out there to get a bargain.

I hope I can find one.

Even more surprising, this eclectic market place

is also having a strange effect on David Harper.

Five pounds. It should be 25 quid, that. It's madness.

It's so cheap it's probably illegal.

What?! Oh, right. He almost had me, there.

And true to form, he's now going on

to squeeze the pocket money out of an 18-year-old stallholder.

Two cracking bits of Murano.

Now, what would your price, to me, be for these?

-20.

-20 on that and how much for that?

-20.

-20.

So here we are, here's the great example of Murano,

made on the island of Murano just off the coast of Italy.

It's interesting because in Murano, they've been making glass for hundreds of years,

even a couple of thousand years,

and many, many moons ago,

to avoid any glassblowers, glass artisans ever leaving the island,

the threat was that, "If we train you on this island,

"you become a master glassblower,

"you leave this island and take those skills elsewhere,

"if we catch you, we'll kill you."

It's a great story and they're still making there today.

What about doing a bulk-buy deal here?

-I'll go for 35.

-35?

-35.

25?

Huh! He's shameless.

-I'll go to 32.

-Do 30 and we've done a deal.

-All right.

-Good man, good man.

OK, fantastic.

David Barby, meanwhile, is going down the ceramic route.

After all, this slipper pan is the perfect opportunity

for some lavatorial humour.

This piece here is a Grimwade, a Grimwade piece.

I like Grimwade pottery and I've just asked what the bottom price is.

-CYMBAL CRASHES

-Huh! That's one.

-50p.

-50p?

-Pee being the operative word.

-CYMBAL CRASHES

-That's two.

Hasn't been used for ages.

-CYMBAL CRASHES

-That's three

and that's probably enough.

-For 50 pence. I've got to buy it for 50 pence, haven't I?

-Yes.

-Yeah.

I've bought something! Oh! I've bought something.

-Thank you very much.

-You're very welcome.

-Not at all.

-I'll give you a pound.

-And there's your change.

-Thank you.

-And there's an Irish luck penny.

-An Irish luck penny.

It's traditional when you buy something, you get a bargain,

you get a luck penny back.

What have I done?

With only £10 left in his pocket, David Harper is calling it a day

and is headed to the Armagh public library, founded in 1771

by the Archbishop Robinson,

who thought of it as the healing place of the soul

and filled its shelves with his collection of rare 17th and 18th century books.

-Welcome. It's a delight to have you here.

-Thank you.

-I'm David.

-I'm Carol.

-Carol. Thank you very much.

You should feel very much at home here

because Archbishop Richard Robinson, who had this lovely library built,

-was from Yorkshire.

-A fellow Yorkshireman.

-Yes.

A wonderful collector. A wealthy man in his own right.

And he set to and he bought and acquired books, manuscripts,

prints, gems, coins.

-It was a very subtle way of saying, "I have money..."

-Yes!

"..and I want to show you that."

Robinson's ultimate aim was to have a university in Armagh,

so he started by building a library and each of the books he introduced

was stamped with his own personal book plate.

But whilst he died in 1794, his collection continues to grow,

containing everything from theology to literary classics.

This is a first edition of Jonathan Swift's Gulliver's Travels.

It's known as Gulliver's Travels. The title is Travels Into Several Remote Nations Of The World.

-That's the original title?

-That's the original title.

I didn't know that.

And then it's by, you see, this surgeon, Lemuel Gulliver,

-and we shorten it to Gulliver's Travels...

-Of course.

The first edition, 1726,

and this is the actual edition in which Swift chose to make changes

in the margins, ready for a further print run.

-There actually have been...

-This particular one?

-Yes.

That's what's so special for us.

-There are areas here where we can actually show...

-Oh!

..in some cases, a little change, in others, more...

-Does that mention Lilliput, there?

-Yes.

-And he's made a change?

The fact that Lilliput has been underlined is fascinating.

If I may show you another one where he was just putting in...

Binding is what's printed and it should have been bending.

-Ah!

-So he was frustrated to find

that there were several printing errors like that.

Swift was so frustrated, in fact, he even fired the publisher.

Wow. Carol, we're having a real feast here, aren't we?

I'm glad you're saying that. That's great to hear.

We thought you might like to see this as well.

It's a 1614 copy of Sir Walter Raleigh's The History Of The World.

-No!

-Raleigh wrote this while imprisoned in the Tower in London.

He had fallen out of favour with Queen Elizabeth.

She was very angry to learn that he had married one of her ladies in waiting in secret.

-Not the done thing.

-No, indeed.

He was imprisoned for quite a number of years

and it was during that time that he wrote The History Of The World.

Now, whilst David Harper's in no particular rush,

David Barby still has more shopping to do.

His next stop is Cookstown, which was founded around 1620

when ecclesiastical lawyer Dr Alan Cook leased the land

from the then Archbishop of Armagh.

It's also the location of the Saddle Room Antiques

and the man in that snazzy tie is Christopher.

-I'm looking for bargains, so I hope you've got some.

-I hope so!

Well, if anyone can sniff one out, it's Barby.

-An old jelly mould.

-A late Victorian white-glazed jelly mould.

-The ones that are collectable are the salt-glazed ones.

-Yes.

But what I like is this still can be used.

That's £18.

What's the best on that one?

-Eight.

-Can you do it for five?

-OK.

I would like that for £5.

That would go nicely with another ceramic object I've bought.

OK, yes.

Mm. Jelly and nobody's business. What an intriguing combination.

Though he's not done yet.

His next acquisition might just be this stick stand, circa 1900.

On the stick stand, I see you've got £78.

I would do that for 35.

35. Your very best at 35?

Erm...

Could you do it for round about 20?

-OK.

-£20? That man could charm the skin off a snake.

What I like about it is it's still got its original drip tray.

The maker's mark is a callipers at the bottom.

It's an interesting piece of social history.

The sort of house this would have come from would be a comfortable residence

where there would have been servants.

This would have been in the hall

because only people of a certain wealth could afford walking canes, umbrellas or parasols.

You'd date this probably round about the beginning of the 20th century.

Which is David's way of saying he'll take it.

For £10, it's very good. Thank you very much.

-What did you say?

-20. It's 20.

-Nice try.

-That's great.

With the shopping done,

it's time for David and David to reveal to each other

what they've bought.

-Can I start first?

-Of course.

-Would you mind?

Right, I think you're going to like this.

-Clap your eyes on that.

-That is very good.

I think it's amazing that they can reproduce things like this.

Oh, stop it. Stop it! You know 100% that is not a reproduction.

It's a trawler's lamp, for goodness' sake.

Erm, I look inside and I can't see any age to it.

It's this sort of thing here, where's there isn't any workmanship.

-Look, it comes out.

-It's a pin. You've just pulled my pin out.

-Final verdict?

-I think it's reproduction.

Now, David, what do you think of these?

-What do you think they're for?

-Do you know what they're for?

-No.

I was hoping you were going to tell me.

But I tell you why I bought them.

First of all they're the Britannia Pottery Company, Glasgow.

-That's good.

-Glasgow.

-Yeah.

These figures are caricatures of Churchill

and people do collect anything to do with Churchill.

OK, get rid of them. I don't like them.

Hmm! Someone's a little jealous.

Right, David Barby, we've got a set of six 19th-century prints.

Very, very dirty, obviously.

What are your thoughts on those?

-I think they're great social history.

-Yeah.

-I do like them. I like anything to do with the countryside.

-Yes.

-Good to have six.

-And hunting - hunting is very popular.

Right, get your second item, then.

What on earth have you been...?

I don't actually think that I want to touch it.

Oh, it's perfectly clean.

-It smells completely fresh.

-Nice.

-Just explain to me...

-What?

-..exactly what it is.

-This is a douche pan.

-What does that mean?

This means that either male or female would sit on it here,

so that the hand could go in there to then wash the...

I haven't tried it.

Thank the Good Lord.

It's a talking piece.

It's good to have visitors to come along to ask you what it is

-and then for you, so eloquently, to explain.

-Or possibly demonstrate.

And if you think that's odd, he's teaming it up with a jelly mould.

The only reason I bought this is because it's white, to go with this.

-So that's a fiver's worth?

-Yeah. You hit the nail on the head.

-Excellent.

Let me get something else.

-What do you think about these? They're one lot.

-Yes.

Good shape. Nice heart shape.

Czechoslovakian.

Erm... Probably made, oh, about five years ago.

Based on, let's say, Murano glass.

Well, that's how I described them, as Murano.

-That's not Murano.

-OK. Would you say that's Murano?

I think it comes from the same source.

I tell you why I don't think it's Murano

because with this fleck, if it was Murano,

-you'd have a gold element in it.

-Ah.

And it has not got that and that always distinguishes it, in my book,

-from, let's say, a host of other glass being produced.

-OK.

Well, listen, let's just agree that they're Murano-esque, whatever.

No. They're either Murano or they're not, David,

and I'm thinking the latter.

-OK. Don't say anything.

-You'll have to stand up.

Well, it's a stick stand.

Circa 1900.

Might be described as Victorian but it's more 1900, 1910.

They used to sell well. Nice drip pan.

Erm, that is worth £20.

-That's how much I paid for it.

-Well done. It's not bad, is it?

I think these are probably Tibetan. They're possibly used for milk.

Now, the lovely chap I bought them off was convinced

that they're Irish and made for the travelling community.

-They're superb quality.

-Yes. They're very well made.

-They're flamboyant.

-Yes. I rather like those.

-One overlight.

-OK.

-I think it's George III.

-It could be Georgian.

So it would have gone above the door of an important house.

-Borrowed light.

-Yeah.

-Bring the light in.

Erm, now, these things, architectural antiques, of course,

were very good news, weren't they, when there was a property boom?

-Yeah. But people are still doing renovations.

-Yes, yes.

If there was a property boom, you'd get 200 quid for that.

Needs lots of work but a good thing.

And now for the adult portion of our antiques.

OK, Mr Barby, tell me what's going through your mind?

-David?

-Yes?

-Get on with it.

Well, it is quite an extraordinary image.

-Do you like it?

-No. No, I don't like it.

-I can't believe it.

-I find this leg awkward.

It's not a natural pose.

I think the breasts are OK.

Oh, yeah, they're OK, I've got to say. They're all right.

But it's modern art and I find it difficult to appreciate modern art.

OK, all right, OK.

She's a beauty. She's a beauty. Get some taste.

HE MOUTHS

Right, David, what do you think of this?

Mm. I like her.

I do.

-I think it's after a Victorian artist called Alma-Tadema.

-Yes.

-He painted sort of Pompeian beauties.

-1860, 1880, 1890.

But what I like about this

is that the artist has put a Victorian face

and this little bit of eroticism was allowed because of the classical subject.

-You could get away with it.

-Yeah.

-Absolutely.

I think that, restored, would be several hundreds.

-I paid 40.

-40. It's for nothing. It's absolutely for nothing.

That, I'm afraid, is the killer buy.

Now, as if I can't guess, what do our experts really think?

Very surprised, in fact horrified,

that Mr Barby didn't like my painting of a nude lady.

I mean, come on, who can say, hand on heart, they don't fancy her?

She's fantastic.

I think the worst object of all was the painting of the female nude

after O'Neill.

I thought it was absolutely dreadful.

Dreadful.

After starting off in Moy,

David Harper and David Barby end the first leg of their road trip

in county town of Omagh.

One of the oldest towns in Ireland,

Omagh traces its origins back to the year 792,

when all that existed was a single abbey.

Since then, there's been rebellion, war, and, oh, yes, it's also been burned to the ground

in the name of William III.

But right now, it's biggest problem is traffic,

courtesy of guess who?

We're going to have to put our foot down. I know you don't like it.

-Don't you put your foot down!

-Hold onto your horses, baby!

-Let's go.

-That's fast enough. Oh, my God!

Assuming Barby can cope with speeds in excess of 30mph,

our next stop is Viewback Auctions.

Though before auctioneer Geoffrey Simpson gets things underway,

how does he rate the chances of our two Davids?

I wouldn't book any holidays on the strength of what they're selling

but none the less, I think they'll possibly show a little profit.

The most interesting article for me

is the architectural window,

which is typically Irish Georgian.

It's a pity that's there's only one

but it does show that the guys have an eye for something good.

I'm not so happy with the fox-hunting prints.

They seem to be a little bit too scruffy.

They have potential, perhaps, if they were cleaned up a bit and reframed.

The most exciting lot for me are the pair of Churchillian Britannia Pottery vases

or jugs or whatever they are called.

I think they should do well. They should make a good few pounds.

Our experts began this journey with £200 each

and over the last two highly competitive days,

David Harper has splashed out a total of £190 on five auction lots.

As for David Barby, he's kept a little more in reserve,

spending £135.50, also for five auction lots.

Mark you, he does have a secret weapon,

thanks to his new-found love of car boot sales.

-Can I hold the lucky penny?

-No.

-Can I look at it?

-No.

-Not even look at it with my eyes?

-No.

Well, if you're quite ready, let the auction begin.

First up, it's David Harper's brass tankards,

-finely decorated, with a touch of Gypsy.

-Go on, pump them up.

-At 40. At 40. At £40 at the back.

-Come on.

At 40. At 45 here at the front. At 45.

-50 at the back, then. At 50, at 50, at 50.

-Come on.

At £50. Any advance on 50? And I sell.

Oh, dear. We've stalled already.

-No, no, no, no, no.

-At £50. At £50. At £50.

-£50 and it's once, £50 and it's twice.

-Don't sell them.

-All finished at £50. Mr X.

-Mr X has just nicked them off me.

Needless to say, Mr X has paid a lot less than our Mr Harper

and that's a £10 loss before commission.

-I can't believe it.

-I think he knows what they are.

Next, it's the David Barby ceramic collection.

Not available in shops.

It's still a bizarre combination, if you ask me,

a jelly mould and a douche pan.

Who's going to give me £50 on the slipper pan and jelly mould?

40? 30? 20?

-Start me at 10.

-No, don't.

-Yes.

-Fiver? Fiver bid over here.

-A fiver?

At 10, at 15, 15. 20 down here.

-At 20, at 20.

-Someone's got taste.

-Any advance on 20?

-The lady's bid at 20.

-I can't believe it. Give me that penny.

-At 20 and it's twice.

-One more go.

-All done at £20. Lady's bid at 20.

Well played, Barby, well played.

Maybe there's something to that Irish luck penny after all.

Give me that penny. Let me just hold it for a while.

Actually, David, you may need it.

There's more than a few doubts over your so-called Murano.

We've got a heart-shaped Murano glass dish.

-He's mentioned Murano again. That's strange.

-It is.

-Who'll give me £30?

-Czechoslovakian.

-At 30, at 30, at 30, at 30, at 30.

-At 35.

-Yes.

-At 40. At £40. At £40.

-A bit of profit. Come on.

Give me the penny, give me the penny.

Sir, you realise these may be a little more modern than you think?

-Are you happy enough? At 40.

-That's good, that's good.

-At £40 it is, once.

-Come on.

-At £40 it is, twice.

All finished and done at £40.

Not bad, considering there's no way on earth they were Murano.

-Will you not let me hold the penny on my next...?

-No.

That's right, Barby, you hold onto it.

After all, your George III overlight is next.

This piece of glass is unique to this part of the world.

-That is true, that is true.

-You never mentioned that.

-It's true.

Who'll start me at £100?

-Start me at 50. 40?

-£1.

Ladies and gentlemen, 30. 20? £20 bid.

-At 20, at 20, at 20, at 20. At 30, at 30, at 40.

-Oh!

It's a pity there wasn't a pair.

We'd be flying into £400, £500.

He's very good.

-At £40 once, twice... All finished.

-I'm very disappointed.

-Sold to a gentleman who knows.

-You just can't stop making a profit.

Yes, and that's another £10 in the kitty.

But now, perhaps it's David Harper's turn to feel the lurve.

It's his thoroughly modern amateur copy of an Irish nude.

HE GASPS She's so beautiful.

Yeah, all right, calm down.

At £20. At 20, at 20, at 20, at 20. At 30.

-Yes. Come on.

-At 30, at 40, at 40, at 40, at £40.

-At £40. Any advance on 40?

-Come on.

-At 40, at 40, at £40.

-At £40 it is once, at £40 twice...

-Come on.

-All finished.

-GAVEL BANGS

-Well, she made a bit of profit.

-Yes, indeed

but perhaps the people of Omagh like their nudes a little more subtle.

So let's see if Barby can tempt them with a cheeky flash of breast.

-Start me at £100. £100. Anywhere?

-That is such a bargain.

£50, then, to start the bidding. 60, there, the gentleman.

At 70. At 70 to the lady. At 70, at 70 to the lady who knows.

-Oh, come on.

-At 70, at 70. Will I say 80?

It's that lady's at 90. Are you going to come again, sir?

At 90. It's the lady's bid. At £90 and I sell.

-Oh, Christopher Columbus.

-At £90 once, £90 twice.

-Get it sold.

-Sold for £90. BA.

Get it done. Well done. Well done.

-Well and truly thrashed.

-I didn't have my penny in my hand.

Oh, dear! I feel so awful for you.

Yeah, poor old David. That's only £50 before commission.

Staying in the art world for just a little longer,

let's see if David Harper can lift his sagging profit margins

with these hunting prints.

Come on, now, babies. Six of them.

At £20. At 20, at 20, at 20, at 20, at 20, at 30.

At £30. Any advance on 30?

-At £30, at £30, at £30, at 30, at 30, at 30...

-Come on.

-..at 30.

At £30, at £30 it is.

So, just to summarise, we're at 30.

At 30, at £30, at 30, at 30, at 40.

-40. Come on. I paid 45. Come on.

-At 40, at 40.

-£40 once, £40 twice.

-No...

-All finished?

-At 40. Mr E.

-Oh! £5 loss.

And don't forget the commission.

David Barby's pottery figures now,

which, I'm afraid, are still proving to be something of a mystery.

I'm getting rather anxious about these.

I don't know what they're for, David.

I just bought them because they were Churchill.

We've had quite a lot of interest in these articles on the internet,

so who's going to give me £200?

-What?

-Start me at £100. £100 bid.

At £100. 120, 140.

140. 160. 160, 180.

-Come on, come on.

-At £180. At £200.

Oh, my! Whatever they are, I love them.

-At £220.

-No.

-At £240.

-I see a smile.

-Not from me.

-At £240. That's once.

At £240. Are you all finished and done? At £240.

-GAVEL BANGS

-And that's why they call David Barby "The Master". Bravo!

I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to applaud there. Well done.

Well, there you go.

Clearly, Barby's in the lead

but David Harper's hoping his ship's lantern

will finally get the bidders excited.

-Come on, boys.

-At £30 bid, at £30, at 40, at 40, at 40, at 40.

-At £40.

-I need so much more.

-I can't go up to 50 if I can't get no bids.

-Nobody wants the thing.

-He's trying hard.

-He's very good.

At 50, at 50. At 60! A-ha!

New blood! At 60, at 60, at 70.

-At £70 behind you, sir. At £70, at £70.

-You're doing well.

-At £70 it is once.

-Your day is here.

-At £70 it is twice.

-All finished at £70. Mr E.

-I'm delighted with that.

And so you should be, old boy. That's £40 profit before commission.

Mind you, it's a drop in the ocean compared to you know who

and it's time for his final lot, the 19th-century stick stand.

-Get your penny out.

-I have.

At 30. £30 bid. At 30, at 30, at 30. At 40, at 40, at £40.

-Who's going to give me 50?

-Nobody.

-At 40, at 40, at 40.

-At £40. I can't get more.

-Sell it, sell it.

-At £40 twice.

-Sell it, sell it.

-All finished, all done? At £40. And the code is Mr E.

-Gone. £40.

-Well!

-Well done, Barby.

Drinks on you, I think, although for some reason, the man's frowning.

-What are you moaning about?

-I only made £20 on that.

-I thought you paid 40 for it.

-20.

Just to get you worked up.

David Harper started this leg with £200

and after commission, made a rather modest profit of £6.80,

which means he ends the first leg with £206.80.

David Barby also started with £200

but after making an exceptional £217.10 at auction,

he now has £417.10 in the coffers and is very much in first place.

But, hey, we've only just begun.

I was well and truly, utterly, hammered, thrashed, killed,

drowned, whatever you want to call it.

Come on, Harper, pull yourself together.

There's still four days to go.

Right, hold on. You are going for a spin.

-Do be careful.

-HE LAUGHS MANICALLY

Aargh!!

Join us tomorrow in the sunny Republic of Ireland...

where David Harper gets a grip of the currency.

-I've only got 200 and something euros.

-OK, right.

She's not very impressed with me.

And David Barby gets a shock.

HE GASPS

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

E-mail [email protected]