Episode 29 Antiques Road Trip

'It's the nation's favourite antiques experts, with £200 each,

'a classic car and a goal - to scour Britain for antiques.'

-Yippee!

-Sometimes a man is in need.

'The aim - to make the biggest profit at auction, but it's no mean feat.

'There'll be worthy winners and valiant losers.'

Knick-knacks!

'So, will it be the high road to glory or the slow road to disaster?'

It landed on the rug!

'This is the Antiques Road Trip.

'Yeah!

'On this road trip, two princely Charlies are vying to take the throne.

'Charlie Ross is a silver-tongued auctioneer whose decades in the biz

'have sharpened his cunning and gilded his charm.'

-Oooh!

-Sealed with a kiss!

'His rival, Charles Hanson, may LOOK barely out of shorts,

'but he's a serious auctioneering nut with a wit that's bang-on.'

-I'm feeling quite explosive now!

-LAUGHS

'Both our proper Charlies started this week with £200.

'The venerable Charlie Ross has managed to swell his coffers to...

'Cheer up, old boy!

'While the young pretender, Charles Hanson,

'is nipping at his opponent's heels with riches totalling...

'They're cruising today in a sleek winnings wagon -

'a 1971 Triumph TR6.

'This week, Carlos and Charlie will cover about 500 miles,

'sailing through the heartlands of England from Tarporley in Cheshire

'to Itchen Stoke near Winchester in Hampshire.

'Today, they begin in Bridgnorth, Shropshire,

'with noses pointed towards their auction in Ledbury, Herefordshire.

'The town of Bridgnorth stretches attractively along the River Severn.

'It's here that Carlos is dropping Charlie off

'at his first shop of the day.'

-Good luck.

-Oh, I can't get out!

'Come on, old boy! Look at his leg going over!'

-Choose carefully.

-Bye. Drive carefully.

'He's ever so agile for his age! And he's off to the Bridgnorth Antiques Centre.'

-I'm Charlie.

-Hello, Charlie. I'm Lynn.

-Lovely to meet you.

'Look out Lynn! This morning, he's got a strategy.'

I'm looking for something quirky, something...different.

'Go for it, then!'

Stoneware figure of Little Bo Peep!

£1,200!

'Cor! That's a little bit out of your price range, Charlie.

'But Lynn does have one rather quirky item. Lucky girl.'

-You can have a look at the vicar's chastity belt.

-I beg your pardon!

-The vicar's got a chastity belt somewhere.

-The vicar has a chastity belt?

-Yes.

He owns this little section here, the vicar.

LAUGHTER

'Sounds like the beginning of a limerick!'

"Victorian copy of a mediaeval chastity belt."

-He's going to demonstrate it.

-'I do hope not!'

-Does the vicar get in that?

-He can. He's skinny.

'Oh, yeah. Well, the less said about that, the better.

'Plenty of things in here have caught Charlie's eye,

'but none of them quite right for the auction, so he's heading off to his next shop.

'Meanwhile, Carlos has driven 14 miles onwards

'to Kidderminster, Worcestershire.

'This statue outside Kidderminster's fine Town Hall

'pays tribute to one of her most celebrated sons, Rowland Hill,

'postal reformer and inventor of the first postage stamp. Mm.

'Carlos is ambling off into the spookily named shop Marley's Ghost,

'where he's meeting Bill, or should it be Bob?'

-Good morning, sir.

-Oh, good morning.

-Your shop is called?

-Marley's Ghost.

-Why?

-I just fancied the name.

'Fair enough, Bill. Let's hope, for your sake, that Charles

'isn't going to imitate Ebeneezer Scrouge. Look carefully.'

What I'm looking for, Bill, is something weird, wonderful,

exotic, something mysterious, something that is an education.

'Cor! You don't ask for much, do you, Carlos(?)

'It looks like Bill's shop might be up for the challenge.'

-It's just a box here, Bill, isn't it?

-Yeah.

'Sharp aren't they? It is a box!

'Oak, leather and canvas for ammunition, probably dating from World War I.'

-How much is that, Bill?

-About eight quid.

-Isn't that interesting?

-I'm feeling quite explosive now!

-LAUGHS

'Oh, no! Puns - they're for me, Charles. Thank you.'

I love how we've got the canvas still lining...

What's the very best, Bill, on this?

About six pound?

It's quite novel. It's quite fun. £6's your best price?

-Yeah.

-I think, Bill...

-..I'll take it.

-OK.

-£6 and that's wonderful! History!

'History, indeed. Carlos has his first buy and is charging onwards.

'His old mucker, Charlie, meanwhile,

'has trucked on to Stourbridge in the West Midlands,

'where he's heading into Charles Langford Antiques

'and meeting dealer Steve - at least he's not called Charles, too!'

-Steve Wilder, nice to see you.

-Lovely to see you, too.

'Pleasantries accomplished,

'Charlie's going to have a good rummage through Steve's stock.

'Hope that's not going to be painful. Lordy!'

I wonder if any of this is for sale.

'Charlie's snuck into the storeroom, where the crafty old dog

'spies items that haven't been put on display. Stand by for a truffle!'

Do you think I'm allowed to be doing this?

'No. I'm pretty sure not. So, look sharp!'

-Ah! Ho ho!

-'Steve's rumbled you!'

-What are you looking at? You're welcome to look at something.

-Am I allowed?

-Oh, yeah.

There's a bit of rosewood there.

'It's a rosewood sewing table!'

-Might it be for sale?

-140 would buy it.

-May I look at it?

-Of course. We can dig it out.

I say!

'Careful!'

That's about 1830, 1840,

-English rosewood sewing table.

-Needs a bit of work.

-Pretty little thing!

-Isn't it?

-I love the top.

If I waved 100 crisp notes in your direction, could you be tempted?

If you were to wave 120, you'd have bought it.

-I'll go 110, if you can possibly do it.

-Yeah, 110 will do.

'An item in the bag and Charlie's browsing on.'

I feel a spending spree coming on!

'Jolly good!

'Back in the shop proper,

'Charlie's been drawn to a little item in the silver cabinet.'

-I like the shape of that.

-Yeah.

'It's a silver sugar bowl dating from 1906.

'Ticket price is £85.'

It's a nice looking thing. I'd give you 50 quid for it, guv'nor!

-50 quid's not a lot for that.

-Perhaps you'd like to think about it.

-Perhaps you'd like to give me £60.

-CHARLIE LAUGHS

And then, you've bought it.

'Charlie's not sure about the bowl yet, so he's going to browse on.'

That's a sweet little thing, isn't it?

'A joy to perceive!

'A 19th-century oil painting of an English market town. Anonymous.'

A little man with a top hat. Very primitive.

'"Primitive", in this sense, means that the artist was probably an amateur or self-taught.

'Or just no good.'

Imagine somebody sitting there in the 19th century, painting that.

Probably comes free with every sewing table!

-BOTH LAUGH

-Not free.

-No!

-It's nearly free! It's only £40.

-A tenner?

'Steve's already knocked the sugar bowl down to £60.

'With the painting added to the deal, they would cost together £100.

'But he's angling for a further reduction. What could Steve do?'

Maybe if we did 70 on the pair of those.

-I think that's quite good, actually.

-Well, you would!

-Mm.

CHARLIE LAUGHS 65 quid.

-You've talked me into it.

-Are you sure?

-Yes, I'm sure.

'So, Charlie's got a bargain deal in this shop, paying £175 total

'for the sewing table, silver sugar bowl and the painting.'

Very happy. Three things in one easy go.

'Carlos has driven on to the town of Bromsgrove, Worcestershire.

'Feeling terribly relaxed about his buying,

'he's going to visit Avoncroft Museum of Historic Buildings,

'where he's meeting museum director, Simon Carter.'

Hello, sir. Nice to see you. I'm Charles Hanson.

'Avoncroft is home to a rich and quirky array of historic structures,

'which have been taken apart in their original locations

'and reassembled here for preservation.

'It's a varied collection, reflecting the built heritage of Britain,

'and in particular of the West Midlands.'

Looking around, there's a wonderful array of different periods,

different styles.

What's behind this eclectic mix of architecture and buildings?

The building behind you was the first of nearly 30 buildings

to be rescued and brought to this site.

'All the buildings here were in danger of demolition or collapse

'when they were moved.

'The collection includes residential buildings,

'like this 15th-century middle-class home,

'as well as industrial and agricultural structures.

'Taking a fragile historic building to bits

'and reassembling it miles from home is no mean feat,

'as this 1960s footage of a building now at the museum shows.

'Charles and Simon are going to look at it.

'It's a windmill dating from the late 18th or early 19th century.'

It was moved here cos it was in a dilapidated state in the late 1960s.

It was when Avoncroft Museum was in its infancy.

Some volunteers went and rescued it one weekend from Tanworth-in-Arden.

You tell me this was moved over a weekend? That's incredible!

I think it was, perhaps, five days in total.

The longest part of the job was dismantling the brick roundhouse.

'Here, the plucky volunteers

'are painstakingly taking the windmill apart, bit by bit.'

It was moved onto lorries and driven back to the museum.

'Here, it was restored to its former glory and stands as a testament

'to the ingenuity of the people who saved it,

'as well as the original builders.

'Simon's taking Carlos to see another structure,

'also saved by the museum.

'It's a blacksmith's forge in which chains were made

'from the mid 19th century right up to 1969.'

It's got 14 forges and there'd have been a man, or woman sometimes,

at each of the forges making chains for hours and hours a day.

'Blacksmith Alex is demonstrating how chains would have been handmade.'

Wow! Unbelievable!

This must be a ferocious heat.

It's about 1,300 degrees.

What I can't believe is a building like this

could be broken down and transported

and put back together again and look so authentic in a new location.

'Indeed! And the museum's collection is nothing if not diverse.

'This site is also home to the national telephone kiosk collection,

'which includes no less than 32 historic telephone boxes.

'Charles is going to have a quick peek on his way back to the car.

'Don't reverse the charges, eh?'

# You can ring my bell Ring my bell

# You can ring my bell Ring my bell... #

-PHONE RINGING

-My phone isn't on.

'Where's that ringing coming from, then, Charles?'

'Better investigate!'

MUSIC: Theme to "Dr Who"

-PHONE RINGING

-'It looks like Charles will be making his own way...'

Hello?

'..somewhere.'

TARDIS FIRES UP

-They hung up on me.

-'Oh, crikey!

'Charlie, meanwhile, is still back in Stourbridge,

'and is strolling off to his next shop, Antiques & More.

'And Charlie the charmer's up to his usual tricks.'

-Hello, ladies!

-'Look out, girls!'

-Hello!

-Two for the price of one!

-Ooh! Thank you!

-I'm Charlie.

-I'm Marion.

-Marion.

-Charlie, hello.

-Hello. Ooh!

Hang on! I feel love coming on!

-And your name is?

-My name's Judith.

What have we got here?

A book for Charles Hanson! LAUGHTER

-That looks like Charles Hanson!

-'Do you know? It does, rather.'

There's some jolly pretty bits here!

Oh! That is sweet!

'Charlie's found a tortoiseshell case for sewing needles.'

-Now, that IS old.

-Yeah.

-'Indeed, it is.

'Dates from the 19th century, meaning it's legal.

'Dealing in modern tortoiseshell is against the law,

'but antique items made before 1947 can be legally traded.'

-Needles would have gone in there?

-Packets of needles.

Those little paper cardboard packets of needles would have gone in there.

It's got a name! That's very nice.

"W. Lund, 24 Fleet", that'll be Fleet Street.

'It's the mark of box-maker William Lund,

'who operated on London's Fleet Street from around 1835.'

-That's a glorious thing!

-It's a nice quality piece.

I can't quite work out the price. Is that £12.50?

-MARION LAUGHS

-No!

You're not telling me it's 125 quid?

'It is.'

There's an old-fashioned expression. What would be your death?

-I can do...

-What can you do?

-75.

Don't recoil from me, my lovely. SHE LAUGHS

Can you do 60 quid?

Um... I can do 65.

-I've got 71 quid and I'm supposed to buy two more things.

-Two more?

I don't care about the other one.

I'll go begging in the street cos I love this so much.

'Let's hope it doesn't come to that!'

-65 quid?

-Mm.

'You are incorrigible, Charlie.'

-Cos I love you!

-'Here we go again!'

Sealed with a kiss!

# Sealed with a kiss #

'He's got that deal all sewn-up.

'Look at that! For a bargain £65.

'With that, our boys have reached the end of another madcap day.

'So, night night, chaps.'

-MUSIC: "Saturday Night Fever"

-'The next day, they're up early

'for their morning work-out - I make all our antique boffins do this.

'Just let them limber up for that day's buying.

'God! They're good together, aren't they? Magic!'

All together now!

BOTH SING: # Onward Christian soldiers...#

'So far, Charlie's spent a substantial £240 on four lots -

'the rosewood sewing table, the silver sugar bowl,

'the oil painting of a market town

'and the tortoiseshell needle holder.

'He has a scant £6 left in his wallet.

'But Carlos has only spent a paltry £6

'on the World War I ammunition box.

'He has £233.50p to spend today

'and he'd better get cracking!'

-Am I in the mood?

-Yes.

-Yes, I am.

'I'm glad to hear that!

'The boys are coming into the city of Gloucester.'

-That's Gloucester Cathedral!

-Doesn't that make you proud of our country?

To see ancient monuments standing so proudly.

'Quite!

'In fact, the remains of Plantagenet King, Edward II are buried here.

'Hm! They're heading for Upstairs Downstairs Antiques...'

Come on! You've got a lot of money to spend!

'..where they're meeting head honcho, Vic.'

-Greetings!

-Greetings!

-How are you?

-Who's the boss?

-I'm the boss.

-You're the man I need are you?

-Yes.

Hello, there. I'm Charles. Good to see you.

'Carlos and Charlie are going to split up to case the joint.

'Charles, it would seem, has a definite strategy today.'

Ask for objects that really are antique. Go for the mediaeval. Go for the Roman rings.

Go for objects which, in historical terms, talk history,

rather than just being edgy with a knobbly knick-knack.

Charlie.

'Hey, you're cocky for a man who's only spent £6, Carlos,

'but true to his word, the clever young buck seems to have unearthed

'something with a bit of age to it.'

I think it's quite novel. Not sure what it's used for.

'Charles THINKS it might be an 18th-century piece of Korean pottery.'

Very crude. Fairly mass-produced, I suspect.

-Yeah.

-For a fairly coarse middle-rate market.

Probably for export from Korea to China

and probably used as ballast on the bottom of a boat.

What's your absolute best price on that?

I'll do it for 15 for you.

-A tenner? I'll take it.

-Lovely jubbly.

'Deal done! Now, on the other side of the shop,

'Charlie appears to be up to something suspicious. Why is he looking so happy?'

I have a cunning plan.

'Charlie has spotted a copy of the Auctions (Bidding Agreements) Act, 1927.

'It's legislation which governs auction houses

'and a copy of it must be displayed in salerooms.'

-Was there an auction here once?

-There was, yes.

'But japes are afoot.

'Charlie has concocted a scheme to trick Carlos into autographing the document,

'thus, he reasons, raising its value.

'He's going to ask if the shop staff will pretend they want it as a souvenir.'

I want you, if you would, before Charles leaves the premises,

-to say to him, "Charles, would you mind signing this for me?"

-Yeah.

I've only got £6 left. I don't suppose they're worth a lot.

-We can do that.

-It's not the biggest deal you've ever done.

But it'll make an old man very happy.

'So, Charlie buys the agreement for his very last £6.'

Five, six.

-OK. It's a deal.

-Shall I leave that with you?

'But will the cunning rouse to get young Carlos's autograph work?'

-I wonder if you'd be so kind to sign it?

-Is that for sale?

'Ha! Too late, Carlos!'

-Sorry?

-It's not for sale, is it?

-No.

-What a shame. I could do with one.

I'll sign it. It'll be a pleasure.

'Ah! What a gent!

'But he'll get a surprise when he sees Charlie's items.

'Still, Charlie seems very pleased.'

(WHISPERS) I think somebody would pay millions for that!

Well, more than six quid, anyway.

'Charlie now has all his items for auction,

'so he's driving the ten miles on to Cheltenham in Gloucestershire.

'He's off to visit the Holst Birthplace Museum,

'hopefully, not looking like that!

'Ah! Much better!

'He's meeting charming curator Laura.'

-Hello.

-Hello.

-Charlie.

-Nice to meet you. Laura.

-Laura!

MUSIC: "Mars, The Bringer Of War"

'Great British composer Gustav Holst is perhaps best known

'for this monumental composition, Mars, The Bringer Of War,

'from his orchestral suite, The Planets.

'Don't be scared. It's only music.

'Holst was born in this very house in 1874.

'Of Latvian and German descent,

'he came from a long line of musicians and artists.'

-Was his father a musician?

-Yes. He was.

-That's where it came from?

Well, his grandfather and great-grandfather were musicians.

Yes, Adolph, his father, was a musician as well.

He played in Cheltenham. He was well known in the concert circuit in Cheltenham.

He would have got most of his musical education from home?

Yeah, exactly, from his father, who introduced him to the piano,

-trombone and violin from an early age.

-There he is!

-Yeah, that's Holst himself.

-He looks rather melancholy.

He always looked melancholy in his photographs and portraits.

-Actually, in reality, he was quite a humorous...

-Was he?

-..humorous person.

That's nice to know.

Always nice to know someone's got a bit of humour.

'Holst's orchestral suite, The Planets,

'is one of the most widely performed and imitated works

'in the 20th-century British classical repertoire.'

This piano which, we think, he composed The Planets on.

This is the actual piano on which the Planets suite was composed?

-Yes, we think so.

-PLAYS NOTE

-I'm not supposed to do that!

-No, that's fine.

'Do behave, Charlie. Anyway, the Planets suite...'

-When was that written?

-Well, he began it in 1914.

He started with Mars, literally just before the war broke out.

-Yeah.

-So very apt, Mars, The Bringer Of War.

But then he continued writing the rest of the suite throughout the First World War.

-It got its premiere in 1918.

-Right.

Then, around the early '20s, that's when it was performed regularly,

and that's when his fame arose.

'Holst also composed in a variety of musical forms.'

He wrote opera inspired by Hindu philosophy and religion,

music for marching bands as well, folk songs,

obviously a lot of choral work.

He wrote across the spectrum, really.

'Laura's going to show Charlie a score written in Holst's own hand.'

This is I Love My Love,

one of Holst's arrangements of choral folk songs.

This is an original manuscript,

so you can see all Holst's workings out here as well.

-Yes, indeed. And all the instruments. Oboe, clarinet.

-Yeah.

-There's the voice.

-Yes.

-Gosh!

It was a traditional Cornish folk song which Holst himself arranged.

'Holst composed till near the end of his life in 1934.

'Now, with thanks to Laura...'

-Thank you very much indeed.

-You're welcome.

-Really interesting.

-Bye.

'..it's time for our own music man to hit the road.

'Charles Hanson, meanwhile...

-Are these your little dogs?

-Max and Paddy.

'..after stopping to make some new chums...

Aren't you lovely?

'..he's driven on to Tewkesbury in Gloucestershire.

'Tewkesbury's fine Tudor buildings and winding streets

'make it the suitably atmospheric place for Charles to finish his shopping.

'But with only two buys and a tiddly £16 spent,

'Charles is fast running out of time.

'He's supposed to be visiting antique shops,

'but has now, shockingly, decided to pursue an alternative plan.

'He's spotted an auction house, Church Street Auctions,

'and wants to see if they have anything he might purchase.'

I wondered whether you might have any unsolds or re-offers

that viably, on behalf of your client, you could sell to me?

'Charles is looking for any items that remained unsold after auction.

'But if they didn't sell at the previous auction, will they sell at yours, Carlos?'

-Have a look and if you see anything...

-Have you got some things I could look at?

-I've got a couple that might interest you.

-Your name, sir, is?

-Bo.

-I'm Charles Hanson. I'm an auctioneer in Derbyshire.

-I know you are.

'Your reputation precedes you, Charles.

'He has precious little time left to find the lots he needs,

'but his chipper confidence remains undimmed.'

Charlie Ross, watch out!

I may have hit on a wholesale gold mine!

'Really, Carlos, get a move on, mate.

'Oh, a pretty little something's caught his eye.'

She's quite nice. Here you've got a Victorian lady.

She really captures the age of, I think, the 1870s, 1880s.

This head's a fabric head with what appear to be later eyes.

But she's quite good. What's the best price on her?

35.

OK. A mental note.

'He's putting her aside as a possibility.

'Don't toy with the girl, Charles!'

-I'm like a boy in a sweet shop!

-'Oh, lordy!'

-You like that?

-That's quite sweet. What is it?

Haven't a clue. I was hoping you'd tell me!

'Let me, then. It's a cup, probably mid-Victorian,

'made from a lacquered coconut shell with wooden and ivory mounts.

'Ivory items, like tortoiseshell, are illegal to trade

'unless they're made before 1947, which this comfortably is.

'Phew. This, too, goes into the "maybe" pile.

'And now he's got something else in his sights.'

Is it World War I, these various buttons?

'It's a quantity of early 20th-century military and regimental buttons,

'mounted for display on a leather belt.'

It's a good military thing.

There's a lot of people interested in militaria and that, so...

What could they be, Bo, as a lot on their own like that?

Uh... I'll do them for 20.

'Carlos is definitely interested in the coconut cup,

'doll and military buttons.

'The combined price Bo's quoting is £75.'

-What's the very best, Bo?

-50.

-For the whole lot?

-Yeah.

-Wow!

I'll take it. Thanks, Bo. I'll take them all for £50. Yeah.

'Three lots bagged, but now he's wandered off and found...

'something else!'

What has caught my eye over here

are one, two, three, four, five...

-'Let's round it up to 17, shall we?'

-17 figures.

And, Bo, they've caught my eye

-because they decorate an area, don't they?

-Yeah.

In a real riot of colour.

'They certainly are a riot.'

-They're Capodimonte.

-They are. They're Capodimonte.

'The original Capodimonte porcelain

'came from the Royal factory in Naples, Italy,

'where it was founded in the 18th century, and closed long ago.

'These items are not from that historic factory,

'you'll be pleased to hear - and that figures.'

-These really are, I suppose, the lower end, aren't they?

-Yeah.

These are more the collectable end.

-I don't know, Bo, would it be viable for me to buy the whole lot?

-Yeah.

Would it really? £20.

-The whole lot.

-25?

I'll tell you what I'll do. You take them all, £23.

-They're awful, aren't they?

-'Yeah, but at £23...!'

I'll take them. Thanks, Bo. That's very, very kind.

What have I done? I've got carried away!

So what?

'So what, indeed! And with that triumphant swipe,

'the young pretender has all his lots for auction,

'so he's off to meet Charlie for the great unveiling.'

I can't believe this extraordinary avalanche in front of me!

Charlie, they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, OK?

You haven't seen what I bought yet.

'First, Carlos's motley collection of figures.'

They're not Capodimonte?

-Please tell me they're not Capodimonte.

-Yes, they are.

-They are.

-I HATE Capodimonte.

-Charlie...

-But carry on.

'Well, that was a positive start(!)'

CHUCKLING: A man with a degree in history, with a lovely saleroom,

a penchant for the wonderful things.

-I can't believe it.

-Some aren't in great condition.

-But they are flamboyant...

-No.

-They're colourful...

-No.

I think they've got a certain character about them.

'No? OK. So, what about the World War I ammo box?'

-Here's my military ammo box.

-Yeah.

-There you are.

-Lovely.

-Just what it is. Tells a story.

-No shells.

-No.

-No frills.

-No.

-Cost a fiver.

-It cost me £6.

'Huh. Maybe the quirky coconut cup will fare better.'

I like this. I think it's quite interesting.

-It's quite an interesting object.

-'Ah! The sweet manna of approval.'

I like this lady as well.

-I DO like her.

-She is definitely Victorian and this dress is period.

-That's lovely.

-Isn't it?

-Absolutely glorious.

That's gorgeous. That's fun. That's history.

-I can't go along with these.

-No.

'Now, Charlie's up.'

Oh, crikey! You bought... Oh, my goodness me, Charlie Ross!

-Goodness me, you bought well!

-LAUGHING: Don't you start!

Hats off to you. I love your objects.

I love your silver sugar bowl. That's lovely quality.

-That's a really good thing, Charlie.

-I bought a bit of furniture.

You know my love for furniture. Careful with the lid!

-It's a sewing case.

-It's a sewing table. Sewing table.

That's too good. It's rosewood.

You know... It's William IV, it's rosewood,

but it's in poor condition.

Mr Ross, I'm willowing here.

This is my prize lot and I'd like you to look at it.

-Oh, no! You didn't?!

-CHARLIE LAUGHS

'Ha ha! Such monkeys!'

I said to the man, "Will you take £6?" He said, "It's not for sale."

-I said, "Please, I want to get you..."

-Oh, no!

-"..to say to Charles Hanson,

-"'Please sign it for me?'"

-Oh, no!

I'd already paid for it when you signed it.

-That means I now have a part share in it, do I?

-No.

-Oh, right! That's wonderful. It cost you how much?

-£6.

-I hope the audience aren't put off by my autograph.

-No.

-That's what makes the value.

-'Quite so!'

-Yeah.

-Good luck, old bean.

-I'm actually lost for words.

'Yeah. Not for long, though.'

For the first time, all of Charlie's items are really quite invigorating.

He bought that ridiculous linen... Auctions Agreements Act

that I signed and how he got that round me, I'll never know!

As always, may the best man win.

He never ceases to amaze me!

I mean...could you ever bracket a man

with such wonderful depth of knowledge and love of antiques

with Capodimonte? I mean it... Dreadful!

Which items would I rather have?

Mine, Charles. Mine!

'Haha. On this leg, Charles and Charlie have travelled

'from Bridgnorth in Shropshire

'to end up in auction here in Ledbury, Herefordshire.

'Ledbury is another town which rejoices in historic architecture.

'Work began on this, the market house, in 1617.

'They're heading to HJ Pugh & Co auctioneers

'and Carlos has certainly dressed for the occasion.'

-Do you think they'll have ever seen a jacket like yours?

-Probably not.

'Well, I'm sure this will be an education for all concerned.

'Charlie Ross began this leg with £246 exactly.

'He spent that whole amount on five lots.

'While the young pretender Charles started with £239.50p

'and has spent a thrifty £89 on six lots.

-'However, disaster has struck.'

-We could be in trouble.

'Oh, no! One of his lots has gone missing!

'The military ammo box was lost in transit.

'If anyone does happen to find it,

'we'd be awfully glad if they'd get in touch.

'But fear not, the Road Trip rules provide for such an eventuality.

'An insurance valuation of the item will be recorded as the sale price.

'An independent assessment tells us that it's valued at £30.

'So, before a gavel's even fallen, Charles has scored a £24 profit.

'Nice - and generous.

'This evening's auction is about to begin, presided over by auctioneer James Pugh.

'Just before the off, what does he think of our lads' lots?'

The rosewood sewing table. Fair amount of damage on that one.

We've had a fair amount of interest from a number of purchasers today.

Capodimonte, um...

..not one of the favourite things, shall we say?

Let's see if we get a bid and go from there.

The signed Bidding Agreement, I would see around the £10, £20 mark.

It's an item everyone would want. Who wouldn't want his autograph?

'Battle is commencing

'and first up is Charlie's cheekily customised Biddings Agreement slip.

'Will his rival's scribbling attract the punters?'

Fiver straight in we go at £5.

£5. £8. £10. Bid at ten....

Stop there! That's far too much.

At £10. Work out what we're doing wrong every time! At £10 here.

12. £12 I'm bid. 12. Internet's out at £12.

-Internet bid!

-Internet bidding!

-15...

Must be your mother!

15...

It's my wife for you!

-That's the way, sir!

-Get it sold.

I won't tell you he just signed another one for you. At £20...

Back in the Hanson name!

Internet's in at £22. Go on. One more.

At £22 here. Five. 25.

Stop it! Stop it, sir!

In the room I go now. At £25 and the internet's out.

Selling at £25.

Well done, sir. Well done.

'It seems the crowd is keen for a little bit of Hanson.

'Canny and cunning, Charlie. A nice profit for you.'

I might start signing a few papers and put them to sale, Charlie!

-And take it all with me.

-That's sorted out your retirement.

-It has.

'Next, Charles's collection of military buttons on a leather belt.

'Might his remaining lot of militaria score a direct hit?'

Tenner only. At £10 here. 15. £15 here. 15.

At £15 for that belt. 20 at the back. £20 bid. At 20...

Come on. Keep going.

Five. 25. 30.

£30 bid. Five.

35 on my right.

At £35 here at 35. Why ever not?

-Here, sir!

-There's a lady!

-40. New bidder at £40.

I should be looking this way. At £40 here. Five more, surely?

At £40 here, 40. You're out left, and internet.

Selling, then, at £40.

That's OK. Happy, Charlie. £30 and off and running.

'A stormer! What a start for Carlos!

'Next, Charlie's pretty but primitive oil of a market town.'

Straight in at a tenner. 15. 20. Five.

30. Five. 40. Five. 50. Five.

60. 70. 80.

-80 with me.

-'I don't believe it.

90. 100. At £100. Take a five if you like.

Five. 105 over here. £105. 105. In the room...

-Brilliant, Charlie.

-Ha ha!

Sold at 105.

Put it there. Well played. That is a wonderful result, Charlie.

'And that puts Charlie firmly in the lead.

'Next, Carlos's little cup.'

Here we go. £5 here. Five. £10.

-Oh, dear.

-£10 in front, I have.

At £10 here. At £10.

-I'm disappointed with this.

-Absolutely!

20. £20 I've got. Internet's got it at £20 here. 20.

Five. 25. £25 bid. At 25.

£25. Internet again. I think they want you to bid once more.

£30 I'm bid. At £30. Thank you.

And the other one would be kind. At £30 bid.

£30 here. At 30. Internet's still got it. The room is out.

At £30. The hammer's up there. I'm going, then, at £30.

'Thanks to some good work from James the auctioneer,

'a tidy little profit for Carlos.

'Now, the rosewood table. Will Charlie have a profit all sewn-up?

£100 to go, surely? 100. 100.

Come on. 80, I'm bid. At £80 here. At 80.

That's brilliant.

I wonder whose it could be(!) At 90. £90 bid. At 100. £100 bid.

110. 110. 120. 130.

130. 140. 150.

150.

160. 170.

170 with me. At £170, I'm bid. At 170.

I like this man!

Had its time, and selling, then, at 170.

Oh!

-Well done. That was a result.

-It was.

'Everything's looking rosy for Charlie! That solidifies his lead.

'Now, Carlos is up with his odd little coconut cup.'

-£20, I've got...

-Oh, dear.

-Don't worry, Charles.

£20 here for the coconut. 30. At £30 here. At 30.

At £30. Phone's out. At £30. Five.

£35 bid. At 35. Why ever not?

I think I might be in trouble for this one! At £35 here.

40 if you like. At £35 bid. At 35. At the back we go.

40. New bidder. 40.

£40 bid. Five. 45.

45, left. At £45 here. 45.

Had its time and selling at 45.

'In the end, it's a nice little earner.

'Now for the sweet little silver sugar bowl for Charlie.'

50, I'm bid. At £50 here. At 50. 60. 70.

80. £80 bid.

At £80, then. At 80. 90 with me. At 90.

At £90. Commission, I've got one, at £90 bid.

At £90 here...

That's fantastic!

At 90. At £90. Disappointed, though, but sold at £90.

It's all right. We don't mind £90. Cost 50.

-That's a profit of how much?

-£40.

-That's fantastic!

'Another toothsome profit for Charlie.

'Now, Carlos's Victorian doll.

'Let's hope a pretty little profit awaits here.'

£100, surely. 100 for the doll? 100?

Come on! £20 here. At 20. A bit of damage but away you go.

At 20. 30...

Come on, hands. Up you go.

£30. I'm disappointed with this. At £30. I'll take a fiver.

At £30 here. At 30.

Five anywhere now? Had its time.

Going now at £30.

'A small win for Carlos. Not enough to take the lead from Charlie.'

Charlie, I'm nibbling at profits. Nibbling.

Charlie, but I can't nibble your gigantic buys.

'Charlie's tortoiseshell needle box is next. Can it pin up a profit?'

£50 here. £50. 60. 70. 80.

In the room I go. £80 here. 80. 90.

100. £100 bid. Ten.

110. 110. Why ever not?

£110. You can't buy it off me tomorrow. £110 bid.

At 110. 20 anywhere now?

Had its time and selling, then, at 110.

-Well done, Charlie. Great result.

-It's a profit.

'A tiny item scores a big profit for Charlie.'

-Good night.

-Where are you going?

-Relaxing.

'It ain't over till the fat lady sings, Charlie.

'Carlos's "much loved" collection of Capodimonte figures - not -

'are still to go under the hammer.'

-40 to go?

-Come on!

-£5 here. Five...

-They ought to be on a shy.

-So you throw things at them.

-Here at £10.

For the lot of them! That's not each. At £10. At £10.

Here in the sale room at £10. 15 anywhere now? Sold, then, at £10.

I loved all your other lots but, Charles, I have to say,

-I put my hand on my heart and say, they were awful!

-Yeah.

'And the saleroom seems to be in agreement, but chin up, Carlos.

'You've done well from this sale - just not quite as well as Charlie.

'Carlos began this leg with £239.50.

'He made a tidy profit of £62.70p and now has...

'Charlie, however, started with a narrow lead and £246 to his name.

'He made a storming profit of £164 exactly,

'and trips off now with...'

-It's dark.

-How long were we out filming for?

-Heck of a long time.

-Long enough for you to make a whacking great loss!

-Exactly.

'Er?'

Except you didn't. You made a profit!

'Quite. Do pay attention, Charlie.

'On the next Antiques Road Trip, Charlie's riding high.'

-Charlie, you can't do that.

-What?

-Get down!

'But who'll be smiling when the last gavel falls?'

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