Episode 4 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip

Some of the nation's favourite celebrities.

What if we were to say 150 for the two, then you've got yourself a deal?

One antiques expert each.

Da-da!

# Da da da da-da da-da da! #

And one big challenge.

Who can seek out and buy the best antiques at the very best prices...

LAUGHTER

..and auction for a big profit further down the road?

-Potential for disaster.

-Who will spot the good investments?

Who will listen to advice?

What you've just come out with, I cannot believe that!

And who will be the first to say, "Don't you know who I am?"?

Time to put your pedal to the metal.

This is Celebrity Antiques Road Trip.

Yeah!

Tonight, we welcome aboard two old hands of stage and screen.

I'll give you a clue.

Firing up the road in this 1975 Jensen Interceptor

is veteran TV presenter Michael Aspel.

And, everybody's favourite Aunt Sally, Una Stubbs.

It's a lovely noise, isn't it, that gurgle? That's the engine.

-LAUGHTER

-I'm having trouble finding somewhere to put my left foot.

I'll probably put it in your lap in a moment!

LAUGHTER

-Do you know this part of the world?

-Not at all.

I've never been here at all.

Look, it's so flat. You can see so far into the distance.

Michael has been on our screens for over 50 years.

From his early work on Come Dancing to his years hosting Miss World,

the newsreader-turned-presenter's career has seen him rub shoulders

with a long list of high-profile names.

Sue Johnston, tonight, this is your life.

Including those unsuspecting celebrities

surprised by his big red book.

That's interesting.

Dishwasher-proof, I'm afraid.

And he should know a thing or two about antiques.

I like pictures a lot. I quite like to fill a room with portraits.

-Dogs are popular.

-Ducks?

-Dogs.

-Dogs.

-And ducks, I suppose.

UNA GIGGLES

And Michael's competition on the road trip is his old mate Una Stubbs,

the current landlady to world-famous detective Sherlock Holmes.

Sherlock! The mess you've made.

A former dancer and chorus girl, Una shot to fame in Sir Cliff Richard's Summer Holiday,

but is maybe best known to most of us

as the apple of a certain scarecrow's eye.

These old chums may be taking each other on,

but they won't doing it alone. Guiding them through this challenge

are two absolute experts in all things antiquey.

James Lewis and Thomas Plant, currently getting to grips

with the trusty 1982 Citroen 2CV, which is back for another trip.

Er, overloaded?

-It's a bit tight, isn't it?

-Tight?

I'm going to be hugging you for the entire journey.

-This is where you have to be careful.

-I know.

-Whoa! That's reverse.

-I know! GEARS GRIND

-Oh!

-That's first!

-James?

-Thomas.

-I can't drive this.

Oh, dear. Thomas Plant started in the antiques business as a porter,

before quickly working his way up the ranks to auctioneer.

He believes that to make money in antiques,

one must have some knowledge. Handy.

But, also, a lot of luck.

Let's hope, for the sake of our celebrities, that he's brought Lady Luck along for the ride.

-Look, look, it's stuck again. Hello!

-Want a push?

Please, would you give us a hand?

-Gosh, they were fit!

-LAUGHTER

-Wa-ha-ha!

-Jolly giant!

James Lewis has a passion for all things quirky

and a reputation for buying the things that no-one else understands.

James's two great loves in his life are animals and antiques.

And he claims that he made his first auction bid

at the tender age of six.

Eugh!

Una Stubbs is just a goddess, isn't she?

I will be a little, sort of, "Oh, it's Una Stubbs!"

I'm glad we're being helped by experts, aren't you?

Well, it's a saving grace, isn't it?

I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to meeting them.

-Michael seems very sophisticated to me.

-Absolutely.

-You could imagine him...

-In driving gloves.

-Yes, driving gloves!

THEY LAUGH

So as our celebrities make their way to meet our esteemed experts,

any pre-match nerves?

I'm really quite nervous about haggling.

Haggling, that is the thing that is worrying me most.

-I usually agree.

-Yes.

Michael and Una have £400 each, two days of shopping and haggling,

and one auction to prove they can buy low

and sell high with the best of them.

Before we throw them in at the deep end,

let's look at the journey ahead.

This celebrity road trip will take place in the delightfully flat county of Norfolk.

Very, very flat Norfolk.

Starting in Holt,

we'll weave our way towards our auction showdown in King's Lynn.

The town of Holt was almost wiped off the map in 1709 by a fire

that spread so fast through its streets, it was virtually destroyed in just three hours.

-There we are.

-Well done, Thomas. That was not easy.

Time to match our celebrities with our experts.

Here we are.

-Hello.

-Michael.

-James, nice to see you.

-Una.

-Una.

-Tell us, are you looking forward to this? Excited?

-Yes.

-We're hoping you are, because you're the stars of the show.

-Oh, hardly.

Michael, don't you know a tremendous amount about antiques?

This is the terrible mistake that people make.

I just was the mouthpiece of the show

-and then watched like everybody else.

-LAUGHTER

I've learned very little.

I don't know anything about anything, so I'll be glad for your help.

You're with me.

-We.

-And, Michael, you're with me in the 2CV.

-LAUGHTER

Don't look disappointed. It's fine.

See you guys later. Have fun.

Michael, are you confident?

I'm never confident,

but, sometimes, it goes down to something like fear and loathing

and terror and all that stuff. I'm very uneasy indeed.

Fear and loathing in Norfolk?

Now that's a very different road trip to the one I had in mind.

-Don't feel like that, because I will look after you.

-Thank you.

And I will protect you from all the shopkeepers. Don't worry.

Yes, don't worry, Michael. Thomas will look after you. He knows best.

Personally, I'd like to buy some shoes.

If we can keep him out of the shoe shops. He's so sharp.

I've got a bit of a shoe fetish. But for men's shoes, to wear my own.

Yes, it's quite a healthy interest!

No, I don't go trying on my wife's. That's...that's...

-Not her shoes, anyway!

-This is it.

-This is it.

Michael and Thomas's first shop of the day is not a shoe shop,

it's Shirehall Plain Antiques, and they're looked after by Mandy.

-With shoes on.

-Hello.

-Hello, I'm Michael.

-Hello, I'm Mandy.

-Hiya.

Michael, how do you want to do it?

Do you want to have a look yourself or shall we do it together?

-I think that's good idea.

-I think doing it together would be rather nice.

-Yes.

Then any ignorant remarks can be swallowed up by something you would say.

-So that's good.

-I don't know about that. Let's have a look.

Michael have you got a particular style you like?

You're a very stylish man. Obviously, we can see your very dapper, so you obviously like

-the finer things in life.

-I'm an Art-Deco bloke, really.

There's also an emotional connection with when I was born.

That was the time, you know, when it all happened.

-It's my time, as it were.

-I'm pleased to know you're an Art-Deco guy.

-Not exclusively.

-No, because I love the Deco.

First the shoes and now the Art Deco.

Could this be the beginning of a beautiful friendship?

The cinemas I used to go to were all Art Deco.

How old did you have to be?

You had to be 16, so I borrowed my father's identity card.

They said, "According to this, you've just done six years in the Army, hop it!"

I was only 14.

While Team Aspel are getting to know each other...

Una and James pose for a quick photo with the local paparazzi.

-OK? Pleasure.

-I make you look like a giant.

HE LAUGHS Everybody makes me look like a giant!

So do I buzz off on my own?

-You can if you like.

-No, no, no. No, no. No, I'd rather be with you.

In that case, let's look together and see what we like,

-throw a few ideas around...

-Good.

-..and see what we can find.

-Lovely.

-This is it, this is our first one.

-Oh, oh!

-Da-dum!

-After you.

Una and James's first shop of the day

is Richard Scott Antiques

and Una is straight in there.

-Gorgeous.

-Straight-sided coffee cans.

-Yeah?

So, early 19th century.

-Coffee...?

-Coffee can.

If it's got a straight side, it's a coffee can.

-Why "can"?

-I presume it's like can of baked beans.

-Oh, I see.

-Whereas that one, with the curved side, is a coffee cup.

-That's lovely.

Very pretty.

James is keen to give his celebrity apprentice a lesson

in buying antiques.

When you're looking to sell at auction,

-you have to not think what you like.

-Oh!

-Because you're never going to own it and you'll never see it again.

-Yeah.

-It'll be sold at the auction.

-Oh.

-You've got to take, in a way, all of the emotion out of it.

-Yes.

Oh. Ooh.

Oh!

-Glass is popular now, isn't it?

-It can be, yeah.

-In the light.

-Very pretty.

-Isn't it?

-Yeah. 1920s, probably. 1930s.

At auction it would make £8.

-Yes. 28.

-Very unfashionable. SHE LAUGHS

Aw.

Mmmm.

(I'm going to make such a fool of myself. But I'd quite like to dare.

(Just to see if he's right and I'm not.)

Hm. Go on, Una, we dare you.

Back with the boys and something's caught Thomas's eye.

This is a beast. The Record Enlarger, it's called.

British made, so you can date that between the wars.

Or maybe slightly earlier.

Hm.

This is where the slide went in.

And they just projected it in large form. That's all it's saying.

They hid under that black shroud.

It's got the actual hood still on it, which is amazing.

-Yes.

-To have that still there.

Cor, they want a lot of money for it. £195.

What would they take for that, do you reckon?

-150?

-(A bit more than that.)

Well...

(Yeah, you want £100.)

-Mandy? Hello.

-Yes?

We like this, but we don't like the top price on it.

OK. I will have a chat with him and get the very best price for you.

-Thank you very much.

-I'll do it now.

Your own home cinema.

It's a big lens there, isn't there?

It's a whopper. Let's see you in those.

Oh, no, you don't want to see it - all those pores!

Right, I've had a chat with him. He said the very best on that

-would be 150.

-150.

-Yes.

HE INHALES SHARPLY

He wouldn't go bit more, he wouldn't go 120?

I could do another tenner, that would be it.

-So 140 we're talking about?

-140 is the best.

-Really?

Really, seriously best. That's what he says.

-It is exciting, though, isn't it? It's a fun thing.

-It's different.

-Shall we do it?

-Yes.

-Do you want to do it?

-I do.

-You've got a sale.

-Thank you very much. Very kind.

-Excellent.

-Good. Thank you very much.

-Thank you.

-Our first item.

-Yes.

-Exciting.

-We're off and running.

And we're off and running

to see if Una has moved away from that green decanter.

I must listen to you.

No, no. Keep looking, keep looking.

Ooh. (That is lovely.)

-OK, what have you found?

-An old Chinese pot.

Inside, there's all extraordinary markings,

-like writing.

-Oh. I don't know if it's writing or just dirt.

-Dirt?!

-There's something in there, though.

-It's a ginger jar?

Probably a ginger jar, lost its cover.

-Yes.

-An interesting thing. Very interesting.

-That's the sort of thing that is really speculative.

-Yes, I know.

And at that level, I think you might have found something.

-Da-dum!

-HE LAUGHS

That's lovely, too.

-A bowl, badly chipped.

-Yes.

It's had a very nasty... How about the one at the back?

-Quite bossy, aren't you?

-THEY LAUGH

-More crackage.

-More crackage.

Is it not worth getting if it's cracked? If I got it for tuppence?

If you got it would tuppence, it would. HE WHEEZES WITH LAUGHTER

-It's an interesting little area, this.

-It is.

What's that? The thing that looks as if it's made out of sand?

Now that is interesting.

Chinese.

They've been digging up these mass graves in China for years.

The most famous one is the Terracotta Army, so it's Tang Dynasty,

it's ninth century.

And would be used for incense, or...?

-Could be used incense, or could have just been buried with spices.

-Oh, right.

-With the body.

-Purification.

-Yeah.

Sometimes, they were brightly decorated and very vivid in colours.

But what happened was, because they were buried low in the ground,

the water level would rise

and when the water level dropped, it would take all the colours away.

This, like your pot there, is very, very interesting.

-And £85.

-Right.

It will give that one a bit of meat, to put the two together.

-It doesn't need meat, James!

-LAUGHTER

The current price tag on this little Oriental lot would set Una

and James back a grand total of £133.

My thought was

that it will be a very interesting group together.

-Right.

-SHE LAUGHS

What are you thinking?

Nothing, I have an absolutely blank Buddhist mind.

THEY LAUGH

OK.

Well, that's 24.

It would be nice to end up with it being at 15, something like that.

-Would that...?

-Done.

-Would that be all right?

-Done.

-OK. OK, there's that one.

50p.

-I'll leave you...

-50p, OK.

I'm doing well! Thank you.

We're going to have to make it up on this one.

Well, now...

-Gee, tell you what...

-It's the charm.

I'm going to go and I'll leave you... HE LAUGHS

-OK, the third one.

-Please don't say 50p again.

Una, would you be happy if we paid £30 that?

-Yes.

-My hand is here.

-Who is going to shake?

-Is it all right?

-Yes.

-Done.

-Thank you.

-Super.

-I think that's a really interesting first lot for us.

-I hope so.

Una and James have dipped into their budget and spent £45.50.

OK. Where next?

-Here we are, antiques.

-Ah, that would do.

At the other end of Holt, Aspel and Plant are off

for a poke about Mews Antique Emporium.

-Ooh, another den.

-And this big den is run by the lovely Jo.

Are you looking for anything in particular?

Whatever catches our eye, I think.

-That's where we're going to play it.

-Well, play on, then, boys.

What do you kind of get when you come in somewhere like this?

Well, confusion is the main emotion,

because it is such a mixture of stuff.

-You have to watch every corner.

-I view it as almost an assault

-on your senses.

-Yes.

Because A, your eyes just take in everything.

-You never know what you might find.

-Yes.

-You were in the military?

-Yes,

I did my two years' National Service in the infantry.

-The King's Royal Rifle Corps. Rifleman Aspel.

-Rifleman Aspel.

And I lined, not entirely alone,

the King's funeral parade in London as a National Serviceman.

-In 1952?

-Yes.

-Gosh. Quite emotional, really.

-It was extraordinary.

The procession was glorious.

-OK, Rifleman Aspel, back to today's mission.

-I've spotted something.

Look, it's like a little cricket pitch in there. Isn't that wonderful?

-It's very 1960s, '70s.

-Yes.

It's got its box, that's the important thing, isn't it?

It's got its box and I don't think it has ever been played with.

It's Lord's there. The old Pavilion.

Godfrey Evans Games. The great wicket-keeper.

You said you were in what cricket team?

We had our own little team called the TV Travellers,

-because we had no ground of our own, we just get moving.

-Did you play?

-Godfrey Evans. I played a game with him in our charity matches.

-Did you?

-He and Denis Compton, old pals together.

-So how good were you?

-I was demon bowler.

-Were you?! Fast?

Oh, yes, fast and extremely inaccurate.

Very dangerous, actually. Hurt a lot of bystanders!

Rifleman, demon bowler, friend of the stars,

this is beginning to feel like an episode of This Is Your Life.

Where's that red book, then?

-Can I help you with anything?

-I'm after a deal.

I know it's only seven, but a single note with be fine.

-Five.

-Five?

-Would you do for that for us? What do you think Michael?

-Perfect for us.

Absolutely perfect. At that price? Ideal.

So the price is right on the cricket game and it's time to see

if anything will bowl over the competition as they head for Shirehall Plain Antiques.

Watch out for the ladder.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-If we go under there, that's bad luck.

We need all the luck we can get here! Thank you.

Now, we're running out of time. Shall we wander through the rest?

Let's just have a quiet wander.

But while she wanders,

Una's mind is still on something that caught her eye earlier.

I think that little glass vase would have done well. I think.

-I'd loved to have proved him wrong on that. But...

-Hello.

-Oh!

-LAUGHTER

Which little glass vase?

-The little decanter.

-The green one?

-Yes.

I'd love to... Oh, I'd have been so thrilled, if I was proved right.

Ah, well, never mind, Una. There's plenty more pebbles on the antique beach.

What do you think to that?

-If you look at the base, the base is incredible.

-Beautiful.

Try and lift.

Oh, my...!

Oh!

That is so heavy.

-It's solid bronze.

-Gosh.

-It's a Regency period bronze lamp.

The originals would have been found in one of the excavations,

maybe at Herculaneum or Pompeii.

And this is a direct copy of an antique stick,

something probably made 2,000 years ago.

Excuse me, this can great big bronze lamp, is there much movement in this?

-I shall give him a ring.

-A lot of movement?

James and Una are quite taken by the bronze lamp,

but with price tag a whopping £295,

there's some haggling to be done.

He can do that for you for 195.

-195.

-And it's not yours?

-No, that's right.

-You had to get on the line.

But if you want me phone him back, you can speak to him yourself if you'd like to.

-0oh!

-Do you want to?

SHE LAUGHS

That's frightened her, hasn't it?!

-I could... I could have a go.

-Hello John, it's Mandy.

Would you have a quick word with Una Stubbs?

Hello, John. I'm admiring this beautiful lamp.

But it's still too high for us.

Is there a possibility it can go below 150, please?

I... I...

OK, just a second. 160.

-Ask for 155, go on.

-155?

Thank you. OK, bye.

-Bye. Oh.

-155?

-Yes.

Well done. Well done.

-I was such a creep!

-THEY LAUGH

-Well done.

-I think you'll find it there.

-Thank you very much.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, left. Not under that ladder.

So while superstitious Una and James celebrate their second purchase,

the lads of Team Aspel are leaving no stone unturned.

That's quite nice.

-Most of the tortoiseshell panels are here.

-Yes.

And these are bone.

Oh, look at that. It is tortoiseshell inside. It's had a hard life.

-It's missing two corners.

-A base.

-But this could be restored and it would be beautiful.

-Mm.

What do you think? Have a look.

I just wonder if it is too badly mauled by time.

Well, it has been mauled by time. You're quite right.

But with the tortoiseshell,

I mean, it's got to be 70-90, I would have thought.

Now, tortoiseshell and bone may not be to everyone's taste.

But as this piece was produced in the late 1700s at earliest,

it's perfectly legal now to buy.

I'm looking for...

-a wonderful price.

-We'll try and get him on the phone.

-You think he would like to speak to Michael?

-We'll try, shall we?

Right. What are we saying to him?

How comfortable are you with this?

-Well, I haven't really done it. I don't...

-Ever?

-No.

If I buy a car, they say what it is and I just buy it.

I've never haggled about anything.

But I can state a case, I suppose.

This is quite good. This could be, you know, a revelation.

-Mm.

-It's got 55 on it. Start at 30, 35.

-I think it's worth a go.

-Yes.

-And again, it's not a big-risk item.

-Yeah.

Time for Michael Aspel's introduction

into the world of haggling. Come on, Michael. Go for it.

Oh, hello. My name is Michael Aspel.

We've found it this thing, a trinket box.

55 is what she's got. It is in an awful state, of course.

Although it's very, basically very pretty.

And it would need a lot of restoration work.

So, we thought we might offer £25 for it.

40? Oh.

Is that your best price?

35.

-OK, 35.

-That's very good.

Right. Thanks a lot. Bye.

Well, Michael, for someone who doesn't deal,

who just gets the price and asks...

-There was nobody there, of course!

-No.

THEY LAUGH

You went in with the crushing blow of £25!

-I didn't actually mean to say 25.

-It just came out.

-Yes.

Is the killer Michael Aspel? Was it a bit like when you were bowling?

Yes, it was. A kind of madness seized me

and I just didn't care who got in the way.

-So if you want to go for it, we will.

-35 quid. We should do it.

-Yeah?

-Let's go.

While the boys celebrate their third lot for the auction,

thanks to the negotiations of killer Michael Aspel,

Una and James are back on the road.

Tell me, how do you feel after your morning's antique shop buying?

-Any regrets?

-Of course.

The little green decanter.

Oh! Stop it.

-Oh...

-I knew you loved it. You've got a choice now.

You can either put it in the auction

and see if it makes a profit, or you can just keep it.

-I'm going to keep it, James.

-Oh, good.

Aw. James, you big softy. How sweet of you to buy that for Una.

-And out of your own pocket money, too.

-Thank you.

-It's a pleasure.

-It's dear.

-It wasn't that expensive!

Una and James and her green decanter are heading to the village of Colby,

home to the Straw Works And Crafts Museum,

the largest collection of straw-crafted pieces in the UK.

-Wow.

-OK.

The museum is home to several hundred fascinating pieces

crafted from straw from all over the world.

The items on display include sculptures from Africa and Japan,

straw hats from Switzerland

and delicate items of clothing woven from strands of straw.

This photograph from 1951 shows a young Princess Margaret,

looking gorgeous, wearing a dress embroidered with straw,

designed by Christian Dior for her 21st birthday.

Lucky gal.

Heavy doors!

You're such a gent.

-This could be love.

-Ah, hello.

And the lady responsible for putting this collection together

is Ella Carstairs.

-Lovely to see you.

-I'm James. Nice to see you. Hi.

-My favourite man.

THEY LAUGH

-And I'm Una.

-And Una.

-Nice to meet you.

-Thank you, Una.

-All the girls love you, James.

-Here we go!

83-year-old Ella has been running the museum

single-handedly for over 20 years.

Her collection is housed in five large sheds

in the grounds of her cottage.

In here.

-Wow.

-Oh, my goodness. Look at this.

-Gosh!

It surprises everybody.

You've got an absolute cross-section from paintings to...

-They're not paintings. That's all done with straw.

-No!

-I've done all of these.

-You've done them?

-Yes.

They're all done with dyed straw. All you do is lay your straws

in a trough. When they've absorbed the dye, you take them out

and instead of laying them out on the ground, I stood them up.

Which meant that the colour ran down.

So can you see how natural?

-Yes.

-It looks great, doesn't it?

That's straw for you.

As well as Ella's own creations,

the museum is home to some very unique pieces,

including these boxes, produced by Napoleonic prisoners of war.

-200 years old.

-English?

-French prisoners of war.

So they have been captured over in France on the battlefield

of Waterloo.

They've been brought back to England and they've been put in an open camp.

And they were treated as part of the village

and they did this straw work to give themselves pocket money.

-It's as fine as hair.

-Yeah.

You'd think it would be so brittle to work with.

These are the things that you would expect a lady with great skill

and delicate hands to be doing, not somebody who spends his career

firing cannon.

As well as overseeing the museum,

Ella also runs classes in straw-crafting.

That's beautiful.

# Hello, Dolly Well, hello... #

Let's see how today's pupils get on.

Now, to make a corn dolly, you have five pieces of straw.

Place each bit nice and neatly side-by-side.

-You want me to help you with it?

-Have you tied... Oh, James.

-That should do it.

-Yes.

Lay your corn dolly out into five positions.

But they're standing up, they're not laying out, are they?

You haven't got your hand underneath it, lovey.

You've got it either side of it. You've got it perfect.

Hold it firmly and then swing it round.

And then the one behind the one you've taken over,

you take that over the next two.

-Are you with me, love?

-I'm with you.

-Are you?

-Oh, dear.

-How are you, James?

-Good lad, that's it. That's coming. It's coming.

Excellent. You're getting the hang of it, James.

I haven't had any good remarks, James. Have you noticed?

-I'm going to get a smack, I think!

-THEY LAUGH

-OK, points out of ten?

-I should say six, wouldn't you?

-That's generous!

With their corn dollies finished, it's class dismissed.

And as the sun sets on day one of our road trip,

I'd say Una and James have got off to a dolly good start.

-HE CHUCKLES

-Who writes this stuff?!

And with Norfolk's antique shops closed for the day, it's time

also for Team Aspel to turn in and recharge their haggling batteries.

Night-night.

As a new day dawns in the county of Norfolk,

the pressure is on for our celebrities to find

that special something that will bring in the bids at auction.

-Michael, how's your antique hunt going?

-There's so much stuff.

And in the end, your eyes start to water, your throat dries up

-and you think, "I've got to find something!"

-I know!

-You had James.

-How did you get on with him?

-You know, you feel,

"Oh, gosh, I'm really learning a lot about stuff I had no..."

But he knows about everything.

Una is amazing fun.

She knows exactly what she likes and what she doesn't.

I'm not going to get away with buying anything that she doesn't like.

How did you get on with Thomas?

Very well, thanks.

He gave me the impression that I knew what I was thinking

-and talking about.

-How generous.

-Which is of course not the case!

I have to say, I am with the most modest man ever in the world.

If I could be as modest as he is, I would feel...

Yeah, Thomas, you and modest(!) THEY LAUGH

And I didn't think he'd be a very good dealer and he was amazing.

-Was he, really?

-He was amazing!

The amazing... Ha! ..Michael Aspel

and his new number one fan Thomas Plant have spent

an amazing £180 on three lots for auction.

The projector,

the boxed cricket game,

and not forgetting the result of Michael's first-ever haggle,

the tortoiseshell trinket box...

We thought that we might offer £25 for it.

..leaving the pair with £220 to spend from their original £400 budget.

Mm.

Someone else enjoying the thrill of the deal is Una Stubbs.

James and Una have spent £200.50 on two auction lots.

Their Oriental pot collection, including Una's 50p bowl...

Please don't say 50p again.

..and the bronze floor-standing lamp that set them back £155,

leaving Team Stubbs with £199.50 left to spend.

Back on the road,

Michael and Thomas are heading for the lovely town of Aylsham.

We've bought very well and you never know what we might find now.

Yes. Well, I'm ready for it, I have to tell you that.

Well, that's really good news, because I think it's your turn.

-Well, I won't pick it unless I like it.

-That's the thing.

Let's hope Red Lion Antiques has a plethora of goodies.

-Morning.

-I'm Will Cotton. I like your Easter Island tissue box.

-Fun, isn't it?

-Do you mind if we have a good look?

-Please do.

Here's something unusual, isn't it? The old tortoise.

That's quite cute, isn't it?

It's just...dreadful. HE LAUGHS

But it's wonderful, though, isn't it?

A Chinese dim sum steamer.

-That's fairly modern.

-Fairly modern, but fairly fun, though.

I'm sure it would have been used almost sort of like a centrepiece.

I've not had it before.

Made from hardwood and cane,

this little fellow would be used to steam a variety of different

flavoured bite-sized delicacies, more commonly known as dumplings.

I can see a couple of dumplings from here!

It's eye-catching, isn't it?

You see, I never would have picked that up, Michael.

I never would've picked that up.

I think we'll take that down and talk to Will about that. Shall we?

-I think so. I think it's charming.

-I think maybe if we find a few other

little bits and bobs for him to be friends with...

-Yes, perhaps.

-Well, they do say the tortoise always wins.

James and Una are on their way to the delightful town of Fakenham.

Fakenham's weekly market still takes place in the area

of the original market of the year 1250.

Here we go.

-Shopping head-on?

-Definitely.

Having blown just over half their £400 budget

on just two lots for the auction, let's hope Fakenham Antiques Centre

has some hidden gems for Una and James.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-The centre is run by Jake the dog. Oh, yes, and Brenda.

Hello, Brenda.

-This is Jake.

-Jake. Hello, Jake. Hello!

-Aw!

-Hello.

What did you say? Lots of bargains? Hey?

So, that's how you haggle in doggy language.

Hm.

While Una focuses her attention on finding some treasures

for the auction, James is...

JAMES MIMICS DOG'S WHIMPER

James is... well, communicating with the dog.

I'm lost without him.

I don't know what I'm supposed to be looking... James?

James, we're supposed to be working today.

Oh, plenty of time for that. See you later.

Going to look...

How about those? A pair of boots.

They're a lovely tan leather.

-They've got the stirrups.

-Oh, my goodness.

-40. Can somebody...

-Is that a double zero?

-I would have said 140.

In fact, I thought they were £14,

you might've got away with £14 if you hadn't...

-Oh, James!

-I'll ring the dealer.

Could these boots be walking straight to the auction house?

Well, I guess that depends on the price tag.

I've just spoken to the dealer and he says £80 on the boots.

Mm... No, it's far too much. OK.

Now then, what have we got through here?

Pretty, isn't it? The Clipper. It's £58.

But...

it's quite a decent example. The condition's not bad.

It's probably prewar.

The sails are made from linen sacks,

-but it's got a look to it.

-Mm.

This 20th-century model is a replica of a 19th-century tea clipper.

These were the greyhounds of the oceans.

Built in American and British shipyards,

they were designed to take the trade routes between Europe

and the East Indies, carrying tea, of course.

The most famous of the vessels is our very own Cutty Sark.

Oh, all this talk of tea is making me parched!

Cup of tea and a slice of cake, anyone?

We need to get it for less than £30, if we're going to stand a chance.

-58, so it's about half.

-That's a big jump down.

-It is.

-But we're by the coast, King's Lynn.

-That's true.

How much could the boat be, please?

Um, he said 40.

Would 30 be a possibility for this?

Yeah.

-30. Brilliant.

-Well, that was fairly straightforward.

For £30, it looks like Una and James have their fourth lot

for the auction. Well done.

Back in Aylsham, the likely lads are still carrying on their quest

to find some friends for their tortoise dim sum steamer,

as you do(!)

What have you got there, another bit of Oriental?

This spoon is made from cow horn, and it's about 100 years old.

£15, this is quite a lot of money.

This looks like we've got a bit of a foodie lot on our hands here.

I do like Chinese food.

Not so fond of Indian food, but I do like Chinese.

-Is the Indian a bit too spicy for you?

-Yes.

Moving on, and Michael's on a roll.

Spring roll.

-That's quite a nice blue jar there.

-Oh, let's have a look.

-It is quite fun, isn't it? It's lovely.

-Cookie jar.

-Very popular colour, isn't it, too?

-It is a popular colour.

And it's a sherry thing as well. You can see the age on that.

I had a look under there.

So I think we need to beef up that foodie lot

with something a bit more substantial to it.

-I think that spoon is quite special.

-You like that spoon? Well, go for it.

Cos that will be showy thing.

-You can imagine the porter holding that up.

-That's right.

-The light...

"Oh, that's nice, isn't it? Oh, go on, bid for that!"

And we get a few more bids. It's good, cos it's a showy thing.

I think we've narrowed down what we want to look at, haven't we, Michael?

-Yes, we have.

-That was marked at 12.50. It's an attractive thing.

This is 18. And that was 15.

-45, 50.

-Erm...

-£40.

-I'd like to give you £30 on the dot.

-How about we split the difference? 35.

-I'd be really pleased at 30.

I expect you would, yes!

The thing is, I'm looking to try and make a profit.

Yes, of course. So am I.

Well, I know you are.

I'll tell you what, make it 32.

£30, go on!

-Please.

-OK, then.

-Yeah? Are you going to do it?

-Yes, I will do.

-That's very kind.

-Nice work.

-I think you got yourself a bargain.

So, with a little lot for £30, the boys have spent

just over half of their £400 budget on five lots for tomorrow's auction.

Back on the other side... Anybody there?

..Una is getting another lesson in antiques from Mr Lewis.

I collect snuff boxes, you know. They're great. It's a double one.

This is quite fun, because look.

If you are a great friend of the person,

you would open that and there's a nice, big snuff section there.

Your fingers go all the way in and you take a great wodge.

But if you didn't like them too much, you would open this.

And it was a little shallow and they call it a mean pinch.

-That they would think of that!

-And the brass ones were often

miner's ones, because they didn't spark.

So if you had a steel snuff box and you struck it with a bit of tool

or a bit of rock, it would cause a spark and all the gases

-down in the mines would cause an explosion.

-He knows everything!

That is such an interesting story.

It's fantastic.

I was just a very sad child that grew into a very sad adult!

HE LAUGHS

-Do you know how much his asking price was?

-Let me give him another ring.

-I don't think it would have been that much.

-No.

-25.

-Ah, 25. OK.

-OK, shall we say yes?

-Yes.

-That's 55 for the two.

-Yes.

-HE LAUGHS

-Sure?

-Not that sure, but...

-OK.

And the dealer said if you're really interested in the boots,

you could have them for 40.

-Oh...

-That's fair.

That's really kind. Thank you so much.

Una and James have picked up three more lots for auction.

The unusual George III snuff box, the model tea clipper

and the bargain boots, all for the tidy sum of £95.

So, with five lots in total,

they are calling it a day on their antique buying.

But Michael and Thomas have one more stop.

-A lot of sky around here, isn't there?

-There's a lot of sky!

They're heading to the town of North Walsham to visit Ian Clarke,

a private collector of World War Two militaria.

Do you think people enjoyed being called up for National Service?

Well, you were quite pleased to pass the medical

and be regarded as fit enough to fight for your king.

But as the day got nearer, we weren't quite so excited about it.

-People would say, "It'll make a man of you."

-Did it?

Well, I would have been a man anyway!

TIM CHUCKLES

Ian's collection, which he keeps at his family home,

includes a limited-edition replica

of a recently discovered World War II diary.

-Hello.

-Pleased to meet you.

-Please come in.

-OK.

This was hidden for years and years and years

and it only came to light when the member of the regiment passed away

-and it was given to the regiment.

-Wow.

The diary is one of the most astonishing manuscripts to come out

of the Second World War. It catalogues the story of the SAS

during the conflict

and includes previously unpublished details of top-secret information

and operational orders.

SAS War Diary. 1941-1945.

You don't know who actually wrote it?

Well, the regiment knows, but nobody's allowed to say who he is.

-Why are you involved?

-My teacher at school was Arthur Wood.

And he was called Chippy.

And many years later I bumped into him at a meeting of veterans

and I asked him what he did. He says,

"I was in the Special Air Service. And I dropped into France,

-"June 10th."

-1944?

-Indeed.

"And I was there for two months."

Arthur Wood or "Chippy" served in the SAS during World War Two

as a member of the secret signals operation Phantom.

Chippy was known for being one of the best operators in Morse code

and signals.

And they were seconded to the SAS for D-Day.

And this operation was called Houndsworth.

And this is the actual shot of them getting on the plane

just before take off. And there's Chippy just there.

-And how did Houndsworth go?

-Houndsworth was very successful.

It was to cut the German lines

and to stop reinforcements getting through to Normandy.

They'd gather all the intelligence,

which regiments were going here and there, relay it back to London.

And they did lots of attacks. What these guys did was incredible.

Every serving soldier was admired for what he'd done,

-but these chaps went one step beyond.

-They went the extra mile.

They were in a dangerous position, because in '42,

Hitler issued an order that any captured

Special Air Service parachuters or commando would be shot.

So these guys knew that they were really up against it.

-Do you remember any of your teachers?

-Yes, I do.

I remember quite a few. Mostly Miss Guppy, Audrey Guppy.

When I was seven years old I was evacuated during the war

and she was our favourite teacher. She also had very nice legs,

I was just the right height to appreciate them.

And then lo and behold, she travelled the world after the war

and she now lives five minutes from where I live in Surrey,

and she's 99, very nearly 100 years old.

Still taller than I am, straight as an arrow.

And wonderfully funny and good company. And I see her regularly.

-Do you?

-Certain people do stick in the mind.

Ian and his former maths teacher went on to become good friends.

When Chippy passed away, he left his collection of personal artefacts

from his time in the SAS to Ian.

And did all these men, heroes,

get the special reward at the end of all this?

The majority of them got the French Croix de Guerre.

Chippy also got mentioned on Dispatches.

-Your teacher, Chippy, you remembered him from a boy to an adult.

-Correct.

But he must have been quite special to you.

Yeah. He was.

Because we've lost him now and, yeah, it was quite sad.

Yeah. Very sad.

With the records of these amazing exploits now made public,

the legacy of Chippy and his comrades lives on.

Ian, thank you very much.

-Thank you.

-That was really interesting.

-Nice to have met you.

The teams are motoring on towards the auction at our final stop

of the road trip, King's Lynn.

-When does Sherlock Holmes start again?

-In the New Year.

Working with all those guys,

all those young guys together, must be absolute madness.

-Do you have fun with them?

-Serious fun.

-Do you?

-I'm really the cat that got the cream.

-Hopefully they haven't bought well.

-Hopefully they haven't.

But I've a terrible feeling they might've bought very well.

And as our contestants reunite,

it's time for them to reveal their antiques to the competition.

Shall I reveal?

Oh! You've bought lots of things.

-Oh, my goodness.

-Oh...

So, this is our main purchase.

JAMES: How much was that? THOMAS: It was £140.

Ah!

There's a lot of people out there who...

-know about these things and love them.

-Absolutely.

I wonder who they are!

This is a cricket game bearing the name of Godfrey Evans,

-the great wicket keeper of England fame.

-Isn't that lovely?

-It's quite fun, isn't it?

-It's a lot of fun.

You only paid £30 for it?

- Five. - Oh!

Now, I've got to... That!

-OK, James. No need to snatch.

-Oh, my word!

Yes, it's in a state, but it is eye-catching, isn't it?

-That's fantastic.

-What is it for? A trinket box?

-It's a beautiful...

-Box?

..late 17th-century, early 18th-century, tortoiseshell,

bone...

How much did you pay for that?

-30?

-Five.

35?!

This is the one Michael offered £25 for!

-No!

-Wow!

That's the best thing I've ever known you to buy on Road Trip, ever.

-I'm stunned. That is...

-You must be proud.

So, there we are. Come on, let's go over and see what they've bought. Oh!

-Oh, oh, oh!

-Have you got the Cutty Sark there?

What is the ship?

Is it something, after you've smoked a number of Rothman's cigarettes

you get tickets to go and buy the kit and make it up?

I think it could well be.

- They are quite difficult to sell. - Are they?

-Oh!

-But I love these, though. These little, naughty fellows.

And down there, they're down there, as well.

Yeah, those little devils. 295?! Now what did you pay for that?

-It was £155.

-Mm.

So, OK, 155. And what do we have here?

-We've got the boots! What size are these?

-I think about eight.

-That's your size, isn't it?

-No, it is not!

I had a pair, and they were really smashing.

You know how I like my... Oh, they're a bit small for me. That's a shame.

Una and James's little lot of china has caught Thomas's eye.

Really early! That's like Ming, isn't it?

Just after Ming, I think.

I mean, it's been through the wars, obviously.

Was that nothing, cos it's so broken?

Did you pay...?

I thought you were going to be surprised when I said, "50p"!

-50 pence?! Well, that's amazing! 50p?!

-Thank you!

Now that they've showed their wares,

it's time to find out what the teams really think of each other's booty.

-That box...

-If I'd seen that in a shop, I would have paid £350 for it.

-No?!

-Yeah.

-Golly!

-The boat looks like it's been sort of in a dirty house.

Maybe I'm being a bit pathetic, but there you are.

-The film thing, I would be surprised if it made a profit.

-Yes.

But I don't think it'll make as big a loss as our lamp.

-No...

-HE LAUGHS

Well done, you. I think you deserve a huge pat on the back,

-and I'll buy you a very big drink now.

-Oh!

-You know...

-It's the fun of it.

-It's the fun of it, and I think we will both do fine.

-Yeah.

So it's here, at Tawn Landles auction house,

that Michael Aspel, Thomas Plant, Una Stubbs and James Lewis gather,

each team hoping to make the most profit and, of course,

be declared the winner of tonight's Celebrity Antiques Road Trip.

-Have you missed the 2CV?

-This is an emotional moment. Mm-wah!

You'll get to drive her after.

Looks like an execution chamber.

It's not an execution chamber, it's fine.

£27, new bidder at the back, there.

Auctioneer Tim Landles

has had a chance to look over our teams' purchases.

The tea clipper is an interesting item. A little bit dusty.

They are sometimes considered by other halves

as a bit of a dust trap.

The dim sum steamer, we're not too sure about that item.

I'm not totally sure of how old that might be.

The bronze Ionic candlestand,

we think that is quite a nice-looking item.

It's got some good detail on it.

The top may have had a little bit of repair.

Today's auction is a furniture auction.

The items, whilst we're delighted to have them in,

are more the smaller items that would have perhaps been

in our sale tomorrow,

but we're still hoping for a good turnout today,

and we'll do the best we can.

And a good turnout, it is. Well done, Tim.

With you about, I think I've got the good card here.

All these ladies, you see.

You'll just have to hold up the items as the porter.

No!

And walk around with them up above your head. You'll be fine.

-Take my shirt off.

-Take your shirt off. Yes, absolutely.

Both teams began this journey with £400 in their pocket,

and two days later,

Michael and Thomas have spent £210 on five auction lots.

-It's the killer, Michael Aspel.

-A kind of madness seized me.

Oh!

Una and James, meanwhile, have parted with an impressive £295.50,

also for five auction lots.

HE CLAPS Well done. Well done.

-Oh, I was such a creep!

-HE LAUGHS

Quiet, please! It's time for the auction.

First up, it's Una and James' 19th-century pocket snuff box.

There it is, £10. Start me off at ten?

-HE GASPS

-What am I bid?

-At £5, then. Start me off at a fiver.

-What?!

A fiver I'm bid, sir, over there, at £5. Seven, is there?

At 13. 15.

HE LAUGHS

Take 18. 18, new bid.

20, I'll take it.

20. 23. 25. 30.

35, sir?

It seems no one shares James's enthusiasm for snuff boxes.

Ah-ah-atchoo!

Last time of asking, at £30. 38.

The double-compartment snuff box may have made Una and James

a small profit, but they still have commission to pay on the piece.

I wish I'd just put it in my pocket and bought it myself.

Next, it's Team Aspel's Godfrey Evans cricket game,

still in its original box.

If that makes more than my snuff box, I'm going to eat this.

THEY LAUGH

-Start me off at £10. Seven, I'm bid. At £7.

-Ooh, seven - profit already.

One more sir, at ten? ten? Can I say 12? At 12.

-Wow.

-Take 13. 15?

At 15.

Down here in the middle at £18. Can I say 20?

-They know quality!

-What it's worth!

Last time of asking.

£20, sir.

No, it's 18, was it? 18?

-Oh, no, it's all right, he'll pay 20(!)

-Sorry.

Go on!

THEY LAUGH

The cricket game has made the lads a £13 profit, minus commission.

Moving on to the dust collector...

Sorry, I mean the model tea clipper.

£30, then? Take 30?

Ten, then. At ten. I'll take 12.

-Ooh!

-13? 15. At 18.

20, can I say?

New bidder at 20. 23. 25.

27. One more is 30.

Oh, go on, it's worth that!

More tea, clipper? Vicar?

There it is, then, £27.

It could be dusted, I have to say.

Selling the tea clipper at £27 means a loss for Una and James.

Moving on to Michael and Thomas' second lot,

and it's the Art-Deco cookie jar.

-Start me off at a fiver? £5, am I bid?

-A fiver?!

-Can I say seven?

-Oh no, come on.

-A bidder there at £7.

Ten, sir?

Go on, a bit more.

13? At 13.

Is there 15? Last time of asking.

Well, so far, so good!

Yes, so far so good, indeed, Michael.

So on we go, with Una and James's Oriental lot -

the Tang Dynasty terracotta piece, the Chinese ginger jar

and Una's 50p blue-and-white bowl.

And James is giving the crowd a lesson in pottery.

These are terracotta pieces from another underground burial tomb,

like the Terracotta Army.

Chinese, Tang Dynasty.

700 AD.

1,300 years old.

She doesn't look very impressed.

Opening bid there of £30.

-Come on, come on.

-30, 30, 30. 35, is there?

40, sir? At £40.

45. 50.

55.

60.

All done, then. Last time of asking.

Hold on.

So, £60...

Aw! Boo!

New glasses, auctioneer!

HE LAUGHS

-Aw.

-Ah, well.

Even with the missed bid,

they've made a profit of £14.50, minus commission.

And on, to Michael and Thomas's taste of the Orient -

the tortoise steamer and the exotic bird-handled serving spoon.

-Start me off at £10?

-Go on!

-£5 for them, then?

Can I say seven? Ten. 13.

-£15, with you madam at the back at the moment.

-Oh, bit more!

Last time of asking.

Small loss, Michael. Don't worry about it.

-Did we lose?!

-We lost a small fiver.

Ah well, seems the tortoise doesn't always win.

Mm.

Next up, the early 20th-century cavalry officer's riding boots,

picked up by Una and James for £40.

-£30, then, I'll take.

-Oh, no.

-30, I'm bid, at £30.

40, can I say? At 40.

-Come on, guys!

-At £40.

-Oh!

-It should have a one in front of it!

Last time of asking, new bidder. £45, to you, sir.

Got a bit of wear in them yet, I would say.

-£50. Well, somebody has one heck of a bargain.

-I agree.

Well, I remember someone getting "one heck of a bargain" on the boots

in the first place, James.

Let's see how Michael and Thomas's home cinema gets on.

-Start me off at £50. £30 then. 30, I'm bid, at £30.

-Oh dear.

40. 45.

50. 55.

60. 65.

70. 75.

-£95.

-Go on, make 100.

-95. Go on!

-Go on!

At £95. All done, are we?

Bit more. SHE SIGHS

-No, it'll be fine.

-He finally cracked.

They've got a tough crowd in today,

with an upsetting loss of £45 on the projector.

I think both of our expensive lots are going to bomb,

but it's all about their box.

-Yes.

-If the right people are here for it.

-I think that could do really well.

-Yes.

And the next item is Una and James's big spend -

the bronze floor-standing lamp.

£100 for it? At 110, at 110. At 120.

130. 140.

150. 160.

170. The bidding here at 170.

-Go on, go for another one! Go on!

-At £170.

175.

-Whoa!

-Last time of asking, at 175...

I'm pleased that we got out of that.

Yes, me too, James.

The final piece is the result of Michael's impressive

haggling technique - the tortoiseshell-veneer trinket box.

Could this be Michael and Thomas's trump card?

£50, start me off at 50?

-Guys!

-50, can I say? Tortoiseshell casket.

-Aw.

-It's worth 500!

£20, start me at 20.

Let's hope the bidders are as excited as James,

and he doesn't own it!

25, can I say? At £25, I'm bid.

30, at £30.

At 35. 40. 45.

-No!

-It's at 45. With you at 45.

Can I say 50? 55.

-65. 75.

-Getting better.

85. 95.

-Go on, go on!

-New bidder. 100. 110.

120. 125, right at the back there.

-Keep going, it's worth it!

-Finish at 125.

I promise you, it's worth it!

-Back in here at 130. £130.

-It's his, it's not even mine!

Back in at 150.

155.

165.

Down here at £165.

-Last time... 38.

-Yeah!

Thomas, well done. Give us your hand.

-Well done. Well done, Michael.

-Thank you.

-Brilliant.

-Well negotiated.

-Fantastic.

-Oh, brilliant!

-Good.

So with the trinket box making a profit of £130,

it's a victory for Michael and Thomas.

Well done, Michael. How do you feel? Excited?

Yes, I feel somehow my living's not been in vain.

Oh, stop it, Michael!

So, both teams started their road trip with a £400 budget.

After paying auction costs, Una and James have lost £15.06,

giving them £384.94 at the finishing line.

Michael and Thomas, though, made a small but tidy profit of £40.92

after auction costs,

giving them a grand, and winning, total of £440.92.

Well, I never did. Well done.

All the money our celebrities

and experts make will go to Children In Need.

-I enjoyed that.

-Did you enjoy that, Una?

-In a nervous sort of way, yeah.

-Guys, I have to say, congratulations.

-Absolutely.

Absolutely fantastic result. Great find, great bargaining.

So close! So close!

Come on!

So, thank you, everyone. Especially today's winners,

Michael Aspel and Thomas Plant.

-Were you pleased with your results?

-Oh, yes. It is fun.

It was enjoyable, it really was. And seeing you again, that's nice.

Ah, yes. That's what it's all about, really.

Farewell!

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